Mock the Week Series 14 Episode 3 - James Acaster, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Sara Pascoe

hello and welcome to Mock the Week I'm Dara Breen joining this week our Andy Parsons sarahpascoe and James a caster Ed Byrne Hugh Dennis and Kari Delaney we start with a round call if this is down sir what is the question on the board are six categories sera which category would you like I will have world news please okay world news this yes is 1.6 billion what is the question is how many immigrants are so lazy they haven't even bothered to come over here in decibels is Brian blessed when they go back to us how many drachma will there be to the Euro Scottish people now say they voted yes in the referendum what was the crucial missing ingredient from England's bid for the 2022 world is it how much your cat's owed in YouTube advertising is it when I went on Dragon's Den how much did I want for in my body Hoover business what is the count in Sesame Street up to now we think he's just somewhere in a bar just in a bar one point if you go and use a Glastonbury toilet easy how many people seem to have used that toilet before you what number when typed into a calculator and turned upside down becomes ooh gi after you've popped how many Pringles can you eat before you must stop since I started this sentence how much further as Greece got into debt this is the amount in Euros but Greece are supposed to pay back to the IMF by the 30th of June you have to do I think of it so fast I died the question I looking for was how much money in Euros is Greece need to repay to the International Monetary Fund by the 30th of June that's next choose dates or risk crashing out of the eurozone but he's alone isn't it what they've got is alone I think it might solve itself are we certain they haven't got PPI just on the day before they have to pay back Alexander Syd press the Greek Prime Minister gets a phone call saying we have been trying to contact you so coy he literally looks like that is the face that people do when you go up to and go where's my money that money raising money they want me I would have thought they've got money stuff they could they could have a big episode of the Antiques Roadshow that very spot they could use plastic plates at weddings and if they fail if they fail what's a term called for what'll happen to Gregg's it greg's it it's greater than like it being shortened because I like it when the papers call it a messy Greek exit because that sounds like a pornography description the Greeks have been warned of Gregg's like you know Gregg's it is this thing which is going to emerge from the sea in the categories I besides to read the scary nose in the harbour waters horrible tones just also sounds like the door on the way out of a grapes doesn't it that's what confuses me about above the door ingrates if you eat yourself to death on pasties that's a grexit Gregg's in Athens this this is people going hey my money please I've seen cues like that in Leicester Square on a Saturday night coming to a backwater presumably actually long queues of cash machines leave the hands of the European Commission and their misinformation essentially all these people are on a night out there there are crisis negotiations taking place between the IMF and whether the troika of different bodies have lent money to them and to the Greeks and I think the Greeks will win the negotiation I know wouldn't go on the line for this because with it with only some time to go during the negotiation was the Greeks going please give us a bale aside paint us a favor sighs all they need to do they've got one car to the Greeks can play which is they can play that music which means you will eventually because it starts it starts like it's just quietly in the background just slowly get somebody know give you some money no give us some money no and then over time slowly the pressure builds on this music until eventually it's like give us some money no give us some money no give us some money no an adventure I believe it gets faster and faster until you know leave me alone it's fine really I just wanted you to spend the rest of the evening going could you hear that as well this is all really confusing when it's like the money and the economics of it so actually it does become a lot easier if you convert it to alcohol and think that the ECB is a brewery and the EU is a pub and all of the countries put their alcohol behind the bar but we need more drink with anyway we can make more drinks if we water it down and Germany won't let us do that and they're in charge because they make the best drink which is beer Greece only have a ouzo which is the worst drink and we knew they only had ouzo we shouldn't let them we shouldn't have let them join the pub but we did because we were hammered drunk girls now I mean Greece has passed out it's too drunk and Germany's trying to sober them up and why can't we just kick them out of the bar because if started a tab and not on their cards like we all join accounts for some reason and this is supposed to simplify things in your home we should let Wetherspoons sort it out for billion euros or something last week they started hiding the money everybody started hiding cash and they say in secret places in our squad were hiding their money in frozen chickens this is the strange heightened base that had where they put them in the freezer and they put their money into the chicken we shouldn't know about that that does seem point of hiding if it's a secret we live in England and we know where they've hit their money to me we play the music yet only a little bit sure the people of Greece will be absolutely delighted there is no job here has been affected holidaymakers and British tourists going over there was a statement there they said they're there but that Holly maker should bring over cash well this is big and the statement came from muggers you suggested that people bring cash and credit cards or debit cards so there's my plan to use magic beans as currency holiday think about getting a passport arrived in Athens customs is that driver pass no but I have people are going on holiday to Greece and people going oh well it's cheap sunshine but you're thinking well Syria is cheap sunshine I mean okay you don't maybe get the level of service there but just think the number of people will be at the UK airport to greet you on your return home he's got a fantastic weather it's got beautiful beaches got fantastic food and if you are eating out in Greece my advice would be try the chicken now they're doing at the pincer dance now we play around call your greg's it's our here here and here this gave all James and Gary so if you could make your way to the performance area please this rounds the sound of challenge I launched the wheel of use and where we choose and stop when the performers must step forward and talk about that subject okay here we go the first subject is parties who are screwing us James I like to a surprise party recently my friend Daryl we're all in his living room all of us in the dark hiding this girl phone turn to a soul she went right it's gonna be here in a minute when it gets in everyone jump out gentle surprise and that will be really surprising I argue to be a lot more surprising if instead of that making all that commotion will we all just stood there in his living room in the dark just when you can seem to turn some lights on see how surprised he is then it's a good party are schmoozed I'm good at schmoozing buttering people up I'll give you some schmoozing tips why not a lot of people will tell you when you're schmoozing have a good icebreaker like break the ice well they won't tell you at the end of the conversation and break the ice you don't let anyone else sweep it in take me back to all the lovely little ice cubes that you created it's a freezer over again before you leave so if you leave me the slides something under the fence like death comes to us all some laughs so guys left let's see what topic you have Gary let's spin the wheel rounds hoping his childhood I didn't know what to get my little niece for Christmas so I asked my sister what she's into and apparently at the moment she's mad about frozen stuff so I got her some oven chips and peas every Christmas day we'd always have pigs in blankets or as you probably call them relative sleeping in the spare room winnie-the-pooh possibly the most vindictive chapter in Nelson Mandela's autobiography it was only after I shot the fifth Dombey but I started to wonder why they were all carrying bags of sweets and ringing my doorbell I've been trying to recapture my lost youth I really must get that cellar door fixed one time when his kid I bought a chocolate bar on the inside of the wrapper it said you're a loser or in mind if they've been some sort of competition on make things worse it was a boost as a family we couldn't decide whether to have Nana buried or cremated so in the end we let her live my 13 year old cousins already started taking heroin it's amazing isn't it they shoot up so fast these days our next round is called picture of the week I showed the panel of topical image and asked them to tell me what's happening so what is going on here going do you want to know why I'm called Trump all my finger this is taken at comic-con and this is actually a guest appearance by sloth from the Goonies sorry now he got the money into the chicken they've asked him Donald how many Mexican immigrants is too many it's the caption what's orange angry and never going to be President Donald Trump has announced he's standing for the Republican nomination as president in the election this year did you watch the speech his magical glorious all welcoming speech really badly out of his speech were Mexicans about he is like he's like Nigel fried she's really worried about immigration so his plan if he becomes president is he's gonna build a 2000 mile-long wall between the u.s. and Mexico so he's going to build a great wall to keep people out and at the same time his next point was is not going to be influenced by China who's he gonna use to build the wall he said he said other super things he said to all of the women on the apprentice were either flirting with him consciously or unconsciously he said that a word of warning if they're unconscious they're not flirting it's gonna come down to Bush versus Clinton isn't it in a nation that fought a war to rid itself of hereditary rulers speaks fluent English fluent Spanish so two more than his brother George Jeb Bush is quite multi comfortable for a Republican overseas he's married to a Mexican which just goes to show that in America Mexicans do all the jobs that they don't want to do in other news which iconic building might need to be shuts investments that I never know the difference so the building needs repairs it does need repair so kind of falling apart and full of mice was originally a boil palace I don't know what tell me all this are we on a tour on London buses so pointing at stuff oh you do that and yeah and Parliament's incredibles talked about it's perpendicular gothic which was influenced by the yeah please send us more Sara this is where we came to watch Mock the Week it was influenced by a tiny bit of a Japanese tourists who have been getting anything outside are now going would you say it used to be a royal palace so the king other palaces that aren't royal yeah are there Crystal Palace that's down there my way I think what they found inside them it's infested with with vermin or at least that's what the rats say mots and foxes foxes are scavenging members of the Lib Dems who seem to have fallen away from the group a for me arrived here but one has been picked off minimum is 56 new SNP MPs who've been celebrating their asses off over the last two weeks so you thinking are those two things related three billion of repairs and a hell of a party from the Scottish MP you think that the scourge of 50 Scottish MPs have done 3 billion pounds of the damage back on the train if they hadn't but with big banner under their arm time to move the parliament to Birmingham yes and David counties all in favor of this because that is the hometown of the West Ham football club they suppose they don't see by the way the new master speaking of things that are luck with the new mascot for Partick Thistle Football Club JB strictly a martyr's Contemporary Art has a future and David shook these work has designed a new mask of a practice on the football club you know DG the fans along get them excited raise the moods this is the mascot just even just put some pupils in the eyes just to give them less of an unseeing cataract my voice is an important job like not lonely because you know your Jing the crowd up and you keep the one interchange but often and this is one of my favorite things on the internet people do Duke lecture these often the mascots will be required usually because there they have forgotten to get off the pitch in time to stand at the minute silence if a minute I'll have being held and there is a fantastic collection of mascot who had to look somber or grave respectful this is a particularly like this one that's the Bradford chicken Billy Bantam I think he's called looking very disappointed with it some Greeks have just stored money up his bottom is again very serious that's a buggy bird from West Brom give me one more respectfully changed his face a joyous bounty oh I'm a quirky hammer I'm Charlie hammer but you know there's time for reflection as well scenes we'd like to say so if everyone can make the way over to the performance area I'll be - this week's topics then we'll see what our panelists can come up with okay here we go the first subject is unlikely film trailers a man a man who only wants one thing strepsils in his toughest assignment yet Peter Parker has to pick a peck of pickled pepper go drama intrigue romance gardening spoons all these in other words in dictionary the moving all your favorite administrators are back in human resources to this time its personnel when a hairpiece gets possessed by the devil there'll be hell to pay we love sex but he has no arms which position will he choose missionary impossible if you see one film this year then you're probably a new parent it was a love story that crossed the species barrier he was a man she was a cow coming soon beef encounter coming soon a 3d film where you don't get bored halfway through a lip at the glasses just to see what the screen looks like without it every year I love you more starring Michael Jackson and Benjamin Button coming soon a story of premature ejaculation the grand Budapest hotel brilliant The Times 5 stars The Guardian the beds weren't made TripAdvisor part man part machine part bird part drum it's Roy by bongo cuckoo cop very much a group of Greeks trying to get away with their money chicken run my dad pictures presents your man I know him from something anyway him I think he was in here maybe was house she was definitely a doctor join forces to fight I know him he's got awful I was looking hasn't he it's the bromance of the year ed and David Miliband star in what the was the point of that then things you wouldn't hear on the radio mine I'm sorry for that small pause just at the end of that record they're only my took slightly longer than I expected this is top DJ's of the 1970s prison radio has never sounded so good a hideous car crash has occurred at the end of the a19 it's called Doncaster I never shipping forecast issued by the Met Office at 2 3 4 3 on Saturday the 8th it's going to piss it down you're listening to BBC wiltshire because your car radio has lost reception to what you were listening to and next up on the archers there's an axe murderer on the loose not really someone has an argument with their housekeeper Travel News a coach load of origami enthusiasts has broken down on the m1 and they're all currently sat on the hard shoulder making paper models of cars traffic is described as stationary you're listening to saga radio you're listening little Aldi later Tesco this concludes the shopping forecast have you been injured at work maybe you should turn the radio off and concentrate properly on what you're doing your debt we're all dead we've all been dead from the beginning you've been listening to the final ever episode of The Archers next up on garriga's question time I'll be trying not to laugh like a schoolboy when a woman comes in with a problem about her box hedge this is local radio it's 4 a.m. and no one's listening let's play say something racist roulette due to tomorrow's BBC strike tomorrow's Today program will be today's Today program but called yesterday sometimes when you listen to the radio there's a there's a tune that you can't get out of your head oh please again and again sort of gets faster and faster for the King sir daddy that's the end of the show this week's winners are out burn Judaism by the later commiserations to acne parson sarahpascoe and James a Carter thank you for watching good night

Channel: Mock The Week Full Episodes

Views: 1,009,489

Keywords: James Acaster, Ed Byrne, Gary Delaney, Sara Pascoe, Mock The Week (TV Program), Mock the Week Series 14, Mock the Week Series 14 Episode 3

Id: T-wiDpl_nuk

Length: 28min 56sec (1736 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 25 2015

Reddit Comments

[u/fuzzyjedi]

Any show James Acaster is on is instantly a favorite of mine.

[u/Engineer_in_Training]

this might be one of the best panel show line ups ive seen in ages.

[u/[deleted]]

I would totally watch Sara Pascoe present an entire show about the Palace of Westminster, that'd be awesome.

[u/MartinSchou]

Can someone transcribe that Acaster joke that had Dara in stitches? I didn't get it other than it was some kind of play on RoboCop.

[u/TangledFireGarden]

I had to pause it after Gary Delaney's Mandella joke I was laughing so much.

[u/kendall1004]

One of the best episodes lately! Loved the film stuff :o)

[u/Tigerkix]

THAT SONG IS STUCK IN MY HEAD NOW! I need the name of that song!

[u/MartinSchou]

At 10:30 we get a rather awkward view into Dara's foreplay technique.

[u/thelegitsquirrel]

They really grilled the chicken joke in this episode