Memorable Mom Moments | The Big Bang Theory

it's out of order yes I can read the sign I'm just pondering the implications I think it implies that the elevator doesn't work again I can read the sign but the sign and the tape are covered with a layer of dust which indicates that the elevator has been nonfunctional for a significant amount of time which suggests either a remarkable paiv among the I assume 24 to 36 residents of this building based on the number of mailboxes and given typical Urban population density or a shared delusion of functionality you must be Leonard's mother oh I don't know if I must be but yes um I'm penny I'm his neighbor oh Dr Beverly hoffstead oh nice to meet you oh you're a handshaker interesting uh why don't you come with me I'll walk you to the apartment oh all right would you like to exchange pleasantries on the way yeah sure I guess all right you start okay you know I've always been curious what was Leonard like when he was little oh I think you mean young he's always been little right okay what was he like when he was young you'll have to be more specific oh um okay like five or six [Laughter] five oh well at that age he was well in mesed in what Freud would call the phallic stage of psychosexual development an outmoded theory of course but the boy did spend most of his waking hours with a tight grasp on his penis oh yeah Leonard mentioned you were a psychiatrist well that is one of my degrees my primary field is neuroscience oh well I'm an actress why what what do you mean why well there are studies that suggest that many who go into the Performing Arts suffer from an external locus of identity yeah I don't know what that means well it means you value yourself only as others value you which is often the result of unmet childhood emotional needs oh well I had a wonderful childhood tell me about it I know my dad wanted a boy I I just I tried being good at sports but I hated getting dirty and then I'm assuming you entered adolescence uh he called me Slugger until I got my first training bra and then he just stopped playing catch with me I wasn't Slugger anymore your mother's here if you want to have intercourse with that girl find out what kind of cologne her father wor good to see you mother Leonard rarely talks about his incredibly successful brother and sister please don't go there Howard I understand that unlike Leonard they're at the top of their respective Fields boy you suck well Leonard's younger brother Michael is a tenar law professor at Harvard and his sister just successfully grew a human pancreas in an adolescent Gibbon so she's close to curing diabetes why else would you grow a pancreas in a teenaged Gibbon wow you must be very proud why they're not my accomplishments I have to urinate why are you doing this you know the rules you brought your mom to work you must suffer that was fast oh the middle stall was occupied I'll have to try again later it's totally understandable in bladder voiding as in real estate it's location location location so wait wait wait Howard lives with his mother and Raj can't speak to women unless he's drunk go oh that's fascinating selective mutism is quite rare on the other hand an adult Jewish male living with his mother is so common it borders on sociological cliche it's just temporary I pay rent he lives in the same room where as bassinet was you know both selective mutism and an inability to separate from one's mother can stem from a pathological fear of women it might explain why the two of you have created an air sets homosexual marriage to satisfy your need for intimacy say what that's basically what I just said you brought your husband to work you know the rules how head to the door I'm busy I'm busy too you answer it I can't I'm on the to VI God's sake I don't need to hear that can you just say I'm busy I said I'm busy but that wasn't good enough for you you know what I hope it's one of those home invasion deals and they show me in the head well if it's a home Invader don't tell them I'm on the [Music] toilet there's no one there you're hearing things you crazy old lady so Howard have you and rajes finally summon the courage to express your latent homosexual feelings towards one another what no why not because we don't have Laten homosexual feelings toward one another I see no really I have a girlfriend now and where is she this evening she had to go out of town her grandmother died I see her grandmother died you honest to God Leonard tell her I have a girlfriend I don't know what you're talking about you don't know what I'm talking about tell her I have a girlfriend all right he has a girlfriend her name is bernardet she's working as a waitress but she's going to school to be a microbiologist I would keep in mind that the more passionately you stick to this construct the more you're hurting your partner you really think your lips in my ear is helping hi sorry I'm late oh glad you're here sit down I'll get you a plate mom you remember Penny oh yes the waitress SL actress with the unresolved father issues has he finally come to terms with his little Slugger growing breasts well he sent me a football and a catcher mitt for Christmas so I'm going to say no if it helps we're all good with your breast classic overcompensation oh speaking a father's lard that reminds me I'm divorcing yours what yes he was cheating on me no with some waitress from the University cafeteria can you believe it a waitress oh no offense dear no it sounded like a compliment when did this happen mhm well let's see Sheldon when did I leave Leonard's father September 22nd oh yes that's right the weekend after Leonard's dog died mit's dead she was old and blind Leonard what choice did we have I don't believe this why am I the last to know excuse me Leonard I am the one who's getting a divorce mity is the one who is dead why are you the one making a fuss you're right I'm I'm I'm I'm sorry I'm way out of line so Penny what's new in your life nothing not a damn thing leard sunny boy get out here your Mommy wants to talk to you the hell is going on you're in trouble why didn't you tell me you were tapping my home girl did I say that right yeah not bad not bad are you guys drunk well I hope so otherwise why would we have stopped at Del Taco now how could you not tell me you were in a relationship with this lovely Charming young woman oh thank you you're welcome is it because she's uneducated trapped in a menial service position what the hell happened to lovely and Charming how come you didn't tell me that you and father were getting a divorce how come you didn't tell me you had surgery how come you didn't tell me my dog died what I hear you saying is that you want a more intimate motherson relationship I do there it's late now go to bed I'm getting a warm feeling spreading through my heart that's the Del Taco why is Leonard softly banging his head against his bedroom door speaking of warm feelings come [Applause] here now I'd rather have the bus boy I honestly didn't believe Amy when she told me she had a boyfriend I assure you I am quite real and I'm having regular intercourse with your daughter what oh yes we are like wild animals in heat it's a wonder neither of us has been hurt Amy what is he saying you wanted me to have a boyfriend mother well here he is have to sign off now my Hunger for Sheldon is stirring in my loins oh yes it's time for me to make love to your daughter's vagina thank you Sheldon that went very well agreed Amy I find myself wondering if we should actually engage in Kus at least one time in our relationship Bazinga bedtime please show yourself out she's great huh she's a lovely girl cute as a button that's good to hear cuz I've got some news I hope it's good news because I've got nothing but disappointment in [Laughter] here bernardette and I are getting married Ma you too busy bearing down m ah oh my go M stand back I'm going to break the door down son of a M help stop yelling I'm not happy about this what's the last thing you ever happy about Prospect of fried chicken this is exciting back home the diner on Route four serves sushi but it's just cut up fish sticks and a side of Uncle band put it on the menu in those Kung Fu letters but that don't make it Sushi uh Kung Fu letters might not be politically correct Oh I thought the one we couldn't say was ching chong yeah yeah that too so Shelly what's up with you and your friend Amy if you don't mind a mother prying a bit well there's actually big news on the Amy front she's been studying the neurobiology of addiction in lower animals she is this close to getting a starfish hooked on cocaine you have any idea what's going on with those two it's kind of like the Loch Ness monster maybe there's something there maybe there isn't we'll probably never know uh sometimes it's fun to creep yourself out thinking about it how are you doing on the young lady front I hear you're in some sort of a long-distance situation oh yeah it's raja's sister it's kind of tough she's in India also her parents aren't happy she's dating someone white oh that's a funny turn isn't it cuz you you never think about it going the other way well you can't force things you need to figure out if you're in a relationship or if you're just calling it one it's like they say cat can have kittens in the oven but that don't make them biscuits that reminds me of another saying you can lead a chicken to Crisco but you can't make your mother fry it Sheldon you pest me one more time about chicken I will put you over my knee right here in this restaurant please P her please for me hey give me the flowers and pie but if we show up in you're holding them she'll think they're only from you you they are only from me you said the gift of you was enough yes but now that I've seen what the gift of me with flowers and Pie looks like there's no going back boy I can't wait to see the look on her face we're leaving right now what's wrong nothing sh tell me what's going on I Saw My Mommy with a naked man and she was trying to be a mommy again okay let's do this good luck you aren't you going to come with me while you confront your mother about her sex life I'd rather go back to that bar in assless [Laughter] chaps mother mother mother Shelly I'm so glad you're here I saw you having naked sex what are you talking about earlier I came here to surprise you I looked in the window and I saw you with a man oh Shelly I'm so sorry come here um maybe we should sit down and talk about this can you recommend a surface you haven't had kius on that's not funny maybe we should sit at the table well I'm sure that uh you have a lot of questions who was he his name is Ron I met him at my prayer group how long have you been involved with him a few months and of those few months how long have you been a demented sex pervert that is no way to speak to your mother perhaps not but it is a way to speak to a woman who quoted the Bible to me my whole life and then desecrates one of Ethan Allen's finest sofas I will give you one opportunity young man to apologize or what or I will send you to your room that's ridiculous I am a grown man I am a professional scientist and I currently occupy the moral High Ground go to your room but I occupy the moral High Ground go to your room but I'm a professional scientist go to your room I'm a grun man hello hello are you ready to discuss this calmly like adults I'm I am Shelly I'm sorry that you saw what you saw I know that this is hard for you I think what most upsets me about it mother is the hypocrisy doesn't this contradict all the religious rules you've been espousing your whole life you're right it does and it's something that I'm struggling with these days then why are you doing it because I'm not perfect Shelly and that man's booty is well this is confusing for me but I don't want to stand in the way of your happiness so I'll condemn you internally while maintaining an outward appearance of acceptance is very Christian of you mother if you're going to conduct your life in this fashion then I should let you know that the world has changed since you were a young woman you know it's not all sock hops Soda Jerks and segregation anymore how old do you think I am my point is that you're going to need to be careful you used to be protected by your pre-enlightenment mythology but now you're going to need a stronger friend named latex are you having the sex talk with me well someone has to oh dear lord what no don't look to him he's mad at you right now what are you doing here I thought you moved out oh yeah I was going to and then Debbie and I got to talking over dinner the other night I didn't have any place to go she likes having me around so we both said why leave at the same time is precious it's not that precious I'd like to back you up but it sounds like it was pretty precious sty I can't find my glasses be right there dab dab they're probably on her head or in her neck listen you staying here seems like something she would have talked to me about well maybe if you called your mother more often you'd know you lost my mother's ashes no I'm just saying that sometimes bags are misrouted all right fine where did you mis route the only woman who ever loved me the first what first I met first I just need some information uh what's the flight number 816 I really did mean first just drop it and can you describe the bag um well it's a black there's a red ribbon tied to the handle the world's greatest Mom is in the shoe compartment Mr and Mrs walowitz as far as I can tell your bag arrived in Los Angeles so where is it I don't know perhaps somebody took it off the carousel by mistake so some stranger has my mom is that what you're telling me my poor mother can be anywhere in Los Angeles right now I I wish I was telling knew that um but the passenger could have gotten on an international flight oh okay great so your entire job is to find lost luggage and you've narrowed down the location of my mother to the planet Earth I'm sorry would 500 frequent flyer miles help that could get you to Sacramento great news your bag was returned oh thank God it's okay she's here M's here here thank you so much Ma I'm sorry I didn't take you to the airport I just want you to know that I'll never forgive myself for being so selfish and I promise to keep you close for the rest of my life oh no that thing's going to end up in my bedroom Dr Hoffer I want you to meet my mother Mary so nice to meet you nice to meet you too how was your flight very pleasant and yours lovely almost almost as if someone not saying who was watching over the plane you're kidding right subtle mom real subtle hey sorry I got caught up at work hi Beverly hello oh okay sorry I forgot you remember my mother oh yes hi Mary good to see you again dear yeah and that's what I'm talking about so Mom you haven't seen Penny since we got engaged yeah let me show you the ring oh lovely must have been very expensive no no not at all no we uh found a place online that uh repurposes Diamond drill bits we did not that's not true can I speak to you alone for a second oh sure it came from Tiffany you mean the box right keep walking really doesn't matter to me how much he spent on the ring I think we're not in a rush we'll set a date when the time is right it doesn't matter sweetie the moment a man lays with a woman they are married in the eyes of the Lord the Bible is H to you no I'm sorry that was inappropriate as a psychiatrist I know how important people superstitions can be to them you want to talk about superstitions Sheldon sent me the books you wrote all that nonsense about super Egos and IDs what bull dropped that on the barn floor his name is Sigman Freud hey look at that you both believe in Jewish bearded guys stay out of [Music] this at least the bearded man that I believe in preaches love and compassion all yours talks about is why you hold in your poop and want to crawl back inside your mama it's fascinating how can someone as enlightened as Sheldon come from someone like you I know the answer you're not going to like it try me when I was pregnant with Shelly I was driving to church and I was praying to the Lord to give me a son smarter than his dumbass Daddy and I looked over and I saw a Jesus bobblehead in the Subaru next to me nodding yes what is that supposed to mean it means I can't believe we're having this conversation well do it some more maybe it knock some sense into yourself how we all stop hitting ourselves and talk about something safe you know like shoes or how cute little Chinese babies are it is not my fault that your mother likes me better than she likes you oh don't flatter yourself she likes everybody better than she likes me I'm just feeling a little guilty about all the trouble I've caused oh so am I you made God sad today Mom Sheldon they haven't done anything wrong I think it's nice they're hitting it off that's still the reason to rush into anything I mean look at us we took things remarkably slow you and I we didn't even hold hands for two years it's a lot hotter than it sounds you're a patient young lady hey hey She's Mine take a cold shower Grandpa there's a lot of traffic are we going to be okay you'll be at the airport an hour before your flight good thank you plenty of time for you to meet another geriatric boy toy hey I will not have you be disrespectful to me yes ma'am Sheldon your mother's an attractive woman you need to get used to the fact that men are going to be interested in her and you need to drive the car and mind your business I will not have you be disrespectful to me but you're not my mother don't you be disrespectful to her yes ma'am you'll get there you just got to put some zing on it that's a nice one was it yours when you were little my dad built it for me W it's so cute this was the husband this was the wife they'd go out on adventures together cruising skiing horseback riding that was really me just duct taping them to our dog and did they have kids they did but the mommy and daddy didn't like them so they shipped them off to an orphanage I made out of a shoe box yeah that's not worrisome at all not every girl dreams about being a mom sometimes you think you're never going to have kids and one day you wake up and you're pregnant and it doesn't matter that your career's going great right now and that you and your husband never even got to go anywhere take you dog I skip spin class for this oh wait wait we shouldn't we just eat you know I mean God did take time out of his busy schedule to bless these Sloppy Joe's come on shley tell me your news right this is on you Amy and I are living together in sin like a couple of New Yorkers now while you scold us I'm going to get a knife and a fork Joe may be sloppy but Shelton's not well thank you for letting me know and I for one am thrilled what what where's the Judgment where's the fire and brimstone where's the part where you tell us we're going to hell and I say have you seen the size of the bugs outside we're already there obviously I would prefer if you weren't living out of wedlock but given your special circumstances I'm very happy for you and what special circumstances are those how do I put this by your third birthday you had memorized over a thousand different kinds of trains and I never imagined a woman getting aboard any of them what's you thought I was going to be alone for the rest of my life no just for the middle part CU at the end I assumed there'd be nurses well this is highly insulting Sheldon don't overreact I'm the child she was worried about I have a brother and sister whose combined intellectual wattage couldn't power a potato clock if I spotted them the potato blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah what I was in my room I couldn't hear what they were saying hi Pen oh hello Leonard hello Mother how are you fine and you I'm great well it's been lovely catching up wait hang on we need to talk oh brother I want to know why aren't you proud of me well isn't the real question why aren't you proud of yourself no that is a question and I ask it a lot but let's stick with the one I asked you but why do you think I'm not proud of you because you never say it but two days into chatting with Penny and you can't stop telling her how great she is she is great honestly of all of my children's spouses she's the one that I'm most impressed by seriously yes she's confident she's thoughtful and she never complained about you once I know what kind of strength that takes so Penny's your favorite I suppose she is you married well Leonard and for that I am proud of you I don't I don't I don't know what to say I'm also proud of how hard you're trying not to cry thank you would you like to hang up now yeah here it comes can I have a moment alone I have you calmed down no I'm not calm you really hurt me that wasn't my intention it doesn't matter what you intended what matters is the way you made me feel actually the way you've always made me feel I see so you're here to tell me all the ways that I failed you as a mother yeah and get comfortable cuz it's a long list is it happening soon you know what it doesn't matter doesn't matter you're never going to change if I want you to accept me for me then I guess I'm going to have to accept you for you so I forgive you I didn't ask you to forgive me too bad I forgive you anyway and I forgive myself for taking so long to do it oh my God that feels so good I must admit it it does feel good what does you forgiving me it means a lot thank you for

Channel: Big Bang Theory

Views: 1,802,199

Keywords: Comedy, TV, Funny, The Big Bang Theory, Sheldon, Penny, Leonard, Laughing, Warner Bros.

Id: 04jPLP7txKo

Length: 33min 17sec (1997 seconds)

Published: Thu May 09 2024