Hey, on that note, good morning, New York. Has anyone seen that Christmas tree,
the one up in Gramercy Park? Get your asses down there now if you can. You might need some coffee.
It's got red, white... Hi, Mum. Who's this? What? ..your response to 17.1,
to get this deal across the line. You'll be on your cell phone, right? Flight 164 to Dublin,
please proceed to Gate 27 for boarding. Welcome aboard
this Air-É flight to Dublin. Our flight today is
six hours and 11 minutes. Uh, this is me, I'm told. Thank you. Your seat belts must be fastened
at all times when the "fasten seat belt" sign is on. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
This is Captain Murphy here. We are approaching a bit of turbulence, so I'm going to switch
the seat belt signs on for a while. Sit tight, enjoy the flight and I'll let
you know if there's any development. Are you going home for the Christmas? Are you going home for the Christmas? My mother's funeral. Oh. I'm sorry for your loss. I'm doing something similar myself. My brother...
he's in with the luggage. I'm sorry for your loss. Ah, I lost him a long time ago. We hadn't spoken for... 30 years. I always imagined him,
you know, with children... ..and grandchildren. It was three weeks
before anybody found him. He was in his kitchen. They put him in the ground
with no funeral, no headstone, no nothing, not even a grave. Just a white stick for him and the
hundred others that he was lying with. I mean, nobody deserves that,
do they, huh? - No.
- No. All I can do now is bring him home. We can be together in death
if we weren't in life. The first right thing I do for him
and it's the last. - What was his name?
- Thomas. Tommy. Oh! - I'm Pádraig.
- Daniel... Murphy. Would you go away out of that! Murphy is my name! What are the chances? Fairly high. And where is home? - My mum's from Clonakilty, Cork.
- Oh. Was. Um... My brother's still there. That's the strangest Cork accent
I've ever heard. I'm not from there. - I grew up in Boston.
- Oh. The captain has switched off
the seat belt sign... - Um... would you excuse me?
- You want to get out? - Yeah.
- All right. Right, off you go. All right. Thank you. - Sorry.
- Right. We will shortly be commencing
our in-flight duty-free service. A reminder for those of you
with non-EU passports to please fill in the landing cards. Those with EU passports,
please check now that you have them. Anyone looking for an Air Touch ticket,
please ask a member of staff. Excuse me, miss? What do I fill in here? Your next of kin, sir.
Your wife or your son, that kind of thing. Right. Tray table up, please. Your seat belt, sir. Can you tell your father too, sir? Mr Murphy? Oh, God. Excuse me. He's dead. Are... Are you sure? Well, he's not %*#ing breathing. OK. Don't move. You'll both need to stay in your seats.
We'll get you a blanket. - Is that man dead?
- Don't worry yourself, sir. This is Captain Murphy.
We're going to have to circle... - What's the matter with him?
- Well, he's not breathing! - Are you sure?
- Just give him a %*#ing blanket, Sinéad. - So you're sure you're no relation?
- Yes! I'm sure! Please, I...
I'm gonna miss my connection. But why would he have you down
as his next of kin if you weren't? I don't know. Keep your baggage with you at all times. Any unattended baggage will be removed
and may be destroyed. Daniel. I'm Frank.
We spoke on the phone. Yeah. - He's asleep.
- Thank you for watching him. - Is he OK?
- I don't know. See, I didn't know
what to say to him, so... ..so I Googled it and um... The website said it's... it's important
to be as clear as possible, you know? And um... And so... You and Mum... - You were...
- We were friends, yeah. Ah. Well, we were more than friends,
Daniel. Erm... I was her solicitor. And then we started to... Louis? Hi, Louis. It's coat weather. You know... it was peaceful, Louis. It wasn't like Dad. She died in her sleep. Sarah's gone forever. Yes. Now there's just you to look after me. Yeah. And... you're gonna come to New York. - To live with me.
- No. That's not a fact. Yes, Louis. It is. Breakfast is at 8:45 on a holiday. It's... ..9:37 now. %*#⚫️, %*#⚫️, %*#⚫️, %*#⚫️, %*#⚫️! %*#⚫️! The customer was sending
a deed of sale back to the ex. Then she have too much to drink
and included something she now regrets. I've done it myself.
The drunken text. Never posted, though, no. Uh-huh. Yeah, welcome here, thanks a million. All right, yeah, OK.
OK, bye, bye, bye, bye. No. I'm sorry, Mary. It's already left the depot. I can still fix this. OK. - How you doing?
- If... How are you, Seamus? Thank you. Please, Louis, it's just an expression. - I'm sorry.
- It's not your fault! Jesus, Louis. - I'm sorry.
- No, no, no, I'm sorry. Yeah, I could fly to America
for that price! I'm in work, I gotta go. Sorry about that. Hi. When my mum died,
I didn't want to talk to anyone either. I'm so sorry for your loss. - I'm so sorry, Frank.
- Thank you. Frank said Sarah
would want us to celebrate her life. Celebration's happy.
This is my happy shirt, Mary. OK. Well, I like it, Louis. I'm sorry for your loss. - I'm finished with the funeral now.
- Not coming to the grave? - Is it home-made?
- What? No. Louis, we have to talk about what's gonna
happen on Sunday, 23rd December. You're gonna get on a plane
to come to New York with me. - That is not a fact.
- Yes, it is. I've got you into a great school. It's the best school
on the East Coast for... ..um... Autistic people? Yes. I'm in a normal school. And look where that's getting you. I don't get on aeroplanes with %*#s. What the %*# just happened? Garda down. Garda Sheila O'Neill.
Sending coordinates. Are you all right? %*#⚫️! God, I am... I'm so sorry.
I have no idea what happened. I was just trying to make soup and... I dropped the spoon in the mixer
and it just... ..it just exploded. I think I might have to write this up. Was it your first time using a mixer? Can I ask you what you're doing
in our driveway, Garda? Mr Murphy. I'm afraid... I have very sad news
about Pádraig Murphy. Oh, for %*#'s sake! Listen, it's not you. But I've explained
this many times already. I don't know the guy. I was just sitting next to him
in the plane. We found this um... on him. I think it's a picture of him
and his brother. It just says here
that you're his next of kin. Is there anything I can sign
to clear this up? - Um... I'll look into that.
- Great. It's my first week assigned to a station. I'm in my second year. I'm a trainee Garda. Shh... Can't believe this. - Anyway.
- What's gonna happen to him now? I think we'll wait a year and a day
to see if anyone claims him. No-one will. He has no-one. It was a long flight. Then he'll be buried
by Cork County Council in a year. Cork? - He's from up north.
- They sent him here for you, like. And they cannot... send him back? Jeez, no budget for that. Anyway, thanks again. Sarah would've helped him. What's with calling her Sarah? Louis? Garda! Garda! I can arrange to get him sent home. - You're lovely.
- It's just a couple of phone calls. Father, please.
I've called every funeral home in Cork. They're all saying the same thing -
they can't get him to you until next week. 11am on the 21st
is his brother's funeral. Father, I tried my best, OK? Uh-huh. Get him here to me for then
and they'll be buried together. %*#'s sake. What I'm trying to say
is that's not gonna happen. No funeral home can get him to you
until after the weekend. The 21st is his brother's funeral,
do you see? Are you sure you can't postpone it
just a few days? In a word, no.
No, it's not possible. It'd be a shame to think
that after all this, he'd miss his brother's funeral. I've an inkling
he'd have liked the idea of Tommy and him being put
in the ground together, mm? Sorry, Father,
I have another call coming in. Yeah. Louis, can you get that? Hello, Mr Murphy?
Garda Sheila O'Neill here. So, listen,
I've checked the guidelines. And it turns out you don't need
to have him sent anywhere. In fact, you'd get me
in a lot of trouble if you did. I'm supposed to follow protocol. Is that OK? OK. OK? OK. Great. Thanks again, Mr Murphy. OK. Oh, come on, Eileen.
It's just three hours out of your life. - No, Mary!
- Any normal sister... There and back, it's six hours. I've three funerals this weekend. And any normal sister wouldn't drive you
ten metres for that man. I just don't understand
what you think you'll achieve by going. Well, in an ideal world, I'd get there
in time and intercept the post. And in the real world? It's nice of those two brothers,
helping him. Whatever that thought is, Mary,
%*# it in the bud. There's plenty of work
for solicitors in Cork. I could have a word.
I could introduce you. No. Thank you.
But I'm about to make partner. At least I will
if I ever get back to New York. - Fair enough.
- I have a huge deal closing on the 24th. So this school,
do you think this is a good idea, do you? I do, yeah.
I hear the teachers are brilliant. They have a state-of-the-art
photography studio. I think your mum would think
it was a terrible idea. Sorry. - And another thing - he'd miss Anna.
- Who's Anna? - His girlfriend.
- Anna. Look... I know your relationship with Louis is... ..complicated. What? I just mean... he needs to get to know you
in his own way. On his own terms, you know? I mean, you come back once a year,
for a couple of days... You're not his mum, Frank. Whatever, this has been very helpful. - I'll look over the papers later tonight.
- Right. And he loves the McDaid's soup. If he tells you he only eats home-made,
he's winding you up. Louis never ate home-made, ever. - Daniel.
- Louis, I just need a minute. Mary said that she can loan you a hearse
to drive Pádraig Murphy to Rathlin Island. - Who is Mary?
- The woman who was nice to me at the funeral home
where Sarah lay out dead. - She telephoned.
- I'm not driving to Northern Ireland. - Why not?
- Do you know how far Rathlin Island is from here, Louis? No, I didn't do Geography.
But I did History. I got an A. Northern Ireland was created
as a legal entity separate from the United Kingdom
of Great Britain on 3rd May, 1921. - Really?
- The Government of Ireland Act, 1920. Well, that's great. You see, this is us, Cork,
and this is Rathlin Island. - I want to go to Rathlin Island.
- You want to go there? I want to go to Rathlin Island. All the way across the country, there? But you can't have porridge at 8:45
if you're going to Rathlin Island. So too bad. Well, Sarah said to try and be flexible when an important opportunity
presents itself. How is this an important opportunity,
Louis? The way to tell if someone is your friend
is to spend lots of hours with them. On a car journey, you spend
lots of hours in a small space. I'm your brother.
I am your friend. That's not a fact. Well, if I... If I drive him to Rathlin Island... ..will you get on that plane and come
to New York with me on Sunday without arguing about it any more? Well... if I decide that I want to. No, Louis, this is the deal. If I drive him there... you'll get on a plane
and come to New York with me. It'll make it much more likely
that I will. OK, then. Deal? Deal. Jesus, Louis, this was your idea.
You said you'd get in. Reality can be different
from your expectation of it. I only ever travel in a Volvo. Louis, the Volvo is 19 years old. It's a Mercedes. Very safe. Well, the Volvo 940 has the best safety
features of any car in its class, Mary. It's won awards. What the %*# is that? Cardboard. - What?
- A customer had us order it. Eco-friendly, biodegradable. Wife saw it, she had a conniption,
so he was buried in mahogany. It would've killed him if he'd known. - Anyway, it's all I have.
- Great. Louis won't get in the %*#ing hearse
and we've got a cardboard coffin. Where the %*# does that leave us? Are they canaries? No way, did you know
you had a broken indicator? It's illegal to drive
with a broken indicator. You know, since it's a good cause,
I'd happily be your indicator. Provided we make a slight detour
to Ballyskenagh. I have business there. Thank you, but I'm happy
to make the signals myself. OK, but um... ..I'm actually
a really good navigator as well. It's about 30 minutes out of your way. - Deal.
- What? Deal, Daniel. All right, I mean,
if you can share the driving, - we could make it back tonight.
- Mm-hm. OK, much better for us
to get back tonight, anyway. Great. Mary, Jesus, whatever you do,
don't drive! Bye. You're %*#ed. It's broken. You can't touch my bag, Mary. Ever. OK, I won't. Do you know what?
The two of you are kind of like Rain Man. Although, Louis, you're a lot less... Erm... Sorry, Louis, I didn't mean... Dustin Hoffman's portrayal is accurate
in less than 0.0002 per cent of cases. All autistic people are different, Mary. Yeah, of course. So what do you do in New York? I'm a tax lawyer. - Do you like living in...
- I have a girlfriend. Well done. What's your girlfriend called? - Jessie.
- Jessie? - Do you live together?
- I... I should concentrate on the road. What do you do at the...
the funeral home? General dogsbody. I'm kind of in between things
at the moment. I was working for Save The Children,
in Dublin, and there's not many
charity jobs going in Clonakilty. So for now it's just Save The Stiff, huh? Sorry, that was a bit insensitive. - Holy Mother of...
- Can I help you, Garda? Erm... University Hospital morgue inform me that the remains of
Pádraig Murphy are at these premises. - How's he looking?
- Yeah. - Is he OK?
- He's grand. Thank %*#. Are you looking forward
to your new school? No. No. Hey, I think that's... Eileen, it is my life and I'm doing it. Wait, wait, wait, it's not about Br... %*#. My sister doesn't think that the business
that I have in Ballyskenagh is... good business. Right. The National Highway
Safety Administration agrees that Volvo is the leading company
in automotive safety. - It awarded it a prize last year, Mary.
- Oh? I can't believe that you haven't travelled
in any other car besides this, Louis. Oh, I have, Mary. - Seven times.
- And um... ..why don't you like other cars? Because of dying. If that's Mr Murphy's intention - and
we should always use an "if", Sheila - Rathlin Island is off the north coast
of Antrim, as in the North of Ireland, as in the United %*#ing Kingdom. That's Mr Murphy's home. So that's where
the other Mr Murphy's taking him. We need to sort this out before
it becomes an international incident. - Oh.
- We need to get our ducks in a row before they go waddling
across the %*#ing border. Erm... Uh... If that's Eileen,
will you just tell her that erm... - Hello?
- Mr Murphy. Detective Superintendent
Donall Crowley here. I understand that
you've been made aware that, not being
Mr Murphy's next of kin... - Jesus!
- ..you have no right to move... First you harass me
about being his next of kin and now you're gonna harass me
about not being his next of kin? I can't keep changing my plans based on
the whims of An Garda Siochána. The whims of An Garda Siochána? Sorry, Louis. - What's that banging?
- Cars shouldn't bounce! - Do you want a tissue?
- Yes, Mary. Mr Murphy, let me tell you
the law is not bendable to your whims. I appreciate your call but I'm fine
to get him there myself. Thank you. %*#ing lawyers, Dad. I'd say your mum has got tissues
in here somewhere. Oh. - Sorry, was that...
- Thanks for that! It's lunchtime now. Remember what we said
about being flexible, Louis? Lunchtime is at one o'clock
on a holiday. - It's 2:28 now. I have been flexible.
- Wow. Jesus, was that in there?
I don't want to %*#ing see that. Let's just leave Mum's things be,
all right? Just put it back. It's lunchtime now. Do they know your mum just died? OK, no, I'll look at it right away.
That's fine. Right. Good. You know, I'm trying to explain to you
that I cannot heat up your food. There is a microwave there,
I can see it. - I'll pay you for the electricity for it.
- It's not that. It's just soup. Yeah? It's messy. - 15.60.
- Louis, will you eat it cold? - No.
- Come on. 15.60, when you're ready, please.
I've a lot to do. - Erm...
- Have you the 60 there, please? - Let me see if I have some change.
- Mary! No, sorry. No, no, no, no, no! - Not allowed in here.
- Three minutes. - I'm asking you...
- Mary... No, excuse me.
Knight in shining armour, is it? No, no. - I want you to go now.
- One minute 15 now. This is a %*#ing scandal! One minute 15, we're nearly there. - Daniel, do you need this?
- Scandalous! Jesus! - Louis, what the %*#?
- Take whatever you want. - There's 28 quid in the till.
- No, no. That's our dad's old air gun.
It's been broken for years. That's not appropriate, Louis! I %*#ing told yis! %*#ing hell, Louis.
Why'd you bring that? - For protection.
- Protection from whom? You! You don't need protection from me.
I'm here to protect you. Louis, I'm your friend, OK? Friends are honest with each other. What do you mean by that? Huh? Louis? If you think about it,
it's the same as potato soup. It's just before the potato
gets mashed up. It's a chip, Mary. Thanks for that, Mary. Mary. The Boston Red Sox baseball
team texted. "Season's Greetings." That's nice of them. We had a great season,
didn't we, Louis? Boston Red Sox won
the 2018 World Series, Mary. - That's a big thing, is it?
- Yeah. Are you kidding me? That's huge! Let's get tickets next season, Louis. We can watch the Red Sox beat
the %*#s. Would you like that? Daniel went to
Watertown Regional High school, in Watertown, which is in
the greater Boston area, Mary. He won five medals for running. And his school was
a 12-to 13-minute walk from his house. - Go, Daniel.
- Thanks, Louis. I'm sure Mary wants to hear all that. He won 13 medals
in Clonakilty Community School, which is where I go to school, Mary. - That's where I went!
- It's a... a 13-to 19-minute drive,
depending on traffic. So that's no time at all. Well, no, it's between
13 to 19 minutes, Mary. Oh, my God! You were the American kid
that we all had to clap for in assembly. That was you!
You were in sixth year and I was in third. Why did you move
from Boston to Clonakilty? Because I was born. Louis, who told you that? Huh? - Dark soon. Bedtime.
- Louis! You grew out of that. - Out of what?
- He grew out of that. - Dark soon. Bedtime.
- Louis, you grew out of that. - Daniel!
- Hey! - Dark soon!
- You %*#ing grew out of that! - Daniel's not listening to me!
- Hey, stop that! - You grew out of that!
- You need to pull over. - Can we stop? Daniel, pull over.
- Hey! - Stop the car.
- I can't. I'm on the freeway. He used to be afraid of the dark.
He had to go to bed as soon as it hit. I think we're gonna have
to find someplace. %*#! My God, we're barely out of Cork. Here we go. The last two rooms. Double. And... the single. - Thanks.
- Yep. Thank you. Louis, is there anything
you want to say to me? Look, Louis. What? Jesus! For Christ's sake! I love you, Louis. I would never hurt... I didn't mean to do that.
That was an accident. Is everything all right? Yeah, we're all right! He's fine. Is Louis OK? Yeah. I don't know
what I was thinking, though. At this rate, it'll be next year
before we get there. This is a nightmare. Thanks. - Shots for everyone!
- Fáilte Abhaile, Peter! Fáilte Abhaile, Peter! I... - Fáilte Abhaile, Paul!
- Fáilte Abhaile, Paul! - Cheers. Sláinte.
- Sláinte. - All right, I'm good. I've work to do.
- No, there's one more. 28th floor. - Where?
- 28th floor. - No, but whereabouts?
- Midtown. Where's that? So if New York doesn't feel like home
and Clon doesn't feel like home, then where is home - Watersides? Watertown. Yeah, that's what I meant. Does New York not feel like home
with Jessie in it? Do you know what? Don't worry.
It'll feel like home with Louis there. Mary... ..about Jessie... Fáilte Abhaile, Michael!
Get them into ya, Cynthia! Fáilte Abhaile, Paul! - No, no, no!
- Yes, yes, yes, yes! - I'll do one, you do one.
- Sláinte! Stop spinning! Sorry, sorry, he's been drinking. Er, so... Er... what about Jessie? Oh... There is no Jessie. I just said it as a reflex. Why was that your reflex? I don't know.
I just thought you were a bit... A bit what? Keen. A bit odd. %*#ing %*#. - Mm.
- Daniel. Jesus! Give me a minute. Ohh. Louis. OK, Pádraig. Yeah. You're OK. OK. OK... No, we're not OK. Don't ever mix your spirits, Louis. Although no amount of alcohol can excuse
the fact that your brother is an %*#. To say he's an %*# is correct, Mary. To say he's my brother is incorrect. Sorry, what? What do you mean? Louis, this is coat weather. What does he mean
you're not his brother? Louis said that? Um... Just... Just give me a minute. Daniel... What does he mean, Daniel? My parents adopted him. So? From my girlfriend. So you're his dad? This is more EastEnders now
than Rain Man. Sorry. Are you OK? How... How'd you find out? That I was... - The truth.
- Sarah was organising my new passport. And it wasn't spying
because it's my birth certificate. Sarah is still Mum, Louis. Why do you need a passport? To come and visit you in New York. - You've never visited me.
- That's why Sarah said we should. I'm really sorry. - What are you sorry about?
- All of it. - I'm finished talking now.
- Oh, come on, Louis, I... I didn't... Do you want a cup of tea or something? I think this is a great moment
for you to take over the driving. I actually don't have my licence. What? You... You said yesterday
you'd share the driving. Yeah, but in the grand scheme
of revelations, it kind of pales in comparison. What are you listening to? Louis, what about your deal with Sarah that you wouldn't choose this song
as your song of the day? Sarah's dead. Louis,
how does song of the day work? Maybe you could pick another song? I download one song
each morning, Mary, and it's my soundtrack for the day. So it has to be... ..reflective of ongoing events. Good news, sir. The priest confirmed
they're on their way to him all right. - Aye.
- Yeah. And what follows on the heels
of good news, Sheila? Bonnie and %*#ing Clyde. It's a film, Sheila. Oh, %*#⚫️. That was our exit. Ballyskenagh is back that way. You can't see a %*#ing thing. It's a gun. Have you heard of H %*#ing D? APB on Volvo. Partial reg: 95 Charlie. On the roof is a blue tarpaulin,
covering a coffin. You can't miss this one, lads. I can just get out here. - No, I'll drop you off.
- Please. His parents are funny
about people driving up here. Stop. His mum hates people
driving up here. Just stop. - All right.
- Stop the car, stop, stop! OK. Be back in just five minutes. Who are you texting, Louis? Anna. Have you... told her about Mum, about... Sarah, yet? She's on her holidays. Jesus, Louis, you have to tell her. Otherwise she might find out
through someone else. That'd be weird. Why? Because relationships are about sharing
and supporting each other. And if you cut her out of this... It's... I don't know.
It's just weird, OK? Just tell her. - Hiya.
- What's up? - Did you bring the sale deed?
- Yeah. I need you to stop %*#ing with it, Mary. Mary, what... Everything OK? What are you doing? - What are you doing?
- Here, you can have that. I have loads. That is not appropriate, Louis.
That's not appropriate! Just drive and smile. Gardai are investigating an alleged
incident in a takeaway establishment outside of Fermoy yesterday at 2:45pm. The incident involved a local man being
held at gunpoint by armed aggressors. The Gardai released CCTV footage
of the man and woman shown here. Do not approach them.
They are armed and dangerous. What could you have
possibly sent him that was so bad? Hm? I remember signing the sale agreement
where I was supposed to. I remember dating it. - I remember drawing on it.
- Drawing? Drawing what? Oh, my God. Well, it wasn't flattering
to Brian and it was not PG. Then I wrote some things. Christ, I should be locked up. Will it still be useable? What, legally? Yeah, from a legal point of view,
absolutely. So that'll be in the file in the bank? Yeah. Oh, God. Oh, I can't breathe. - Hello.
- %*#! D-Daniel, what the %*#
are you playing at? - Frank?
- Have you lost your mind? Oh, my God, I'm so hungover. - I need some Hula Hoops.
- All right. Thanks. Yeah. We're being charged with armed robbery
and illegal possession of a corpse. - Excuse me?
- Game over, guys. We're going home. - What happened to our deal?
- You didn't hear what I said, Louis? What? Maybe he has drugs in the coffin. Maybe... he even has them
stitched into the... Oh. Here. - Hello? Detective?
- Hello. This has all been
such a misunderstanding. Look, Detective, tell us where to go
and we'll go straight there. Tell me where you are
and I'll come get you. So now you're offering me a lift? - I'm not leaving you with Butch Cassidy!
- No, it's fine. He's actually... - Actually what, Mary?
- Absolutely. - ..really lovely.
- Oh, Jesus. Probably be there in, like, an hour? Dark soon. %*#! Dark soon. I think my auntie lives near here. Louis, cut that out. We need to turn
ourselves in, this is serious. Dark soon! You know, we could always stop. And visit your %*#ing auntie, Mary?
Is that what you're suggesting? - Daniel's not listening to me!
- Louis, not today. - Jesus!
- Oh, for %*#'s sake! Louis! Louis! It's dark soon and you're not listening
when I say that. Louis... Mary! Oh, Auntie Meg,
it's so nice to see you. You're famous. We saw you on the news, Mary. Who's this guy? He's a gingerbread man? And are these edible?
You can eat these? - Happy with that?
- What about that one there? Have the plate. Grab that one up there. Are you...
Are you gonna be OK here? All right. - Good night.
- What happened to our deal? Well, Louis, things have changed
since we made our deal. I didn't know we'd get in trouble
for bringing him. I'm... I'm a lawyer. I can't get charged with anything. - Louis...
- Good night, Daniel. Good night. I like the hair. Mary? - One mattress or two?
- Two! Jesus! Sorry. Mary, it's for you. It's the cops. - So this is carte blanche?
- Of course not, no. Just asking for your understanding. He'd get upset if we wake him
or make him travel tonight. It's convenient, Mr Murphy. All of a sudden, you have
your brother's best interests at heart. Up till now, you've been content
to drag him all over the country, wasting Gardai resources
on a wild %*#ing goose chase. - Please, he's afraid of the dark.
- Two seconds. I'll ask him. He'll give you his statement
in the morning. Sorry. CUH Morgue say they can have
a van here for eight tomorrow morning. Oh, OK. Yeah. That's fine. - Yeah.
- Great. And we'll go wherever you want us
to go first thing in the morning. Oh, Jesus. You do not leave this house.
Understood? Yes, sir. Absolutely. Daniel, you are my father. Hey? Hey? How are you? Ohh! I am so, so sorry.
She's like the baby Exorcist. I'll ask Auntie Meg if she's got
something you can wear. - Yeah.
- There's um... - There's...
- Oh. - I think you got it.
- Yeah. Fine. I'm doing a poo! - Sorry.
- We'll be out of your way. That's OK. Right. Now, come on, lads, bedtime.
Come on. - Bedtime. Night, yeah?
- Night. It was nice to meet you, Daniel. Santa can hear and see you, you know. Oh, Je... %*#⚫️. - Probably should have taken Louis'.
- Give me one minute. I'll be right back. Just put a top on. Ohh! %*#. Yes! OK, I know %*# education in our school
was bad but... I gave my mum this for her birthday. It's lovely. I was 12. That makes sense. She still used it. It's all right. It's OK. - What time is it?
- We don't have to get up yet. You OK? You don't think I'm awful? No! God, no. It must have felt awful, though, at the time. Did you ever get that feeling as a kid... when you got in trouble and... ..it just felt like
the whole world was gonna end? I mean, we had to move,
we had to leave Watertown and... ..Louis never seemed to stop crying. If I tried to help, Mum would tell me
to go do my homework. I'd... I just... I don't know. Did you have Mr Ryan for Geography? Sure, no wonder you thought
the world had ended, so. Did you ever talk to anyone? - Like a counsellor?
- What happened with your ex? Oh, %*# me, smooth deflection. We were together... ..ten years. And then it just started to get %*#⚫️ty. He said we should break up. But he couldn't afford to move out
and we couldn't afford to sell the flat. So we just stayed living together. That was hard enough. And then... Yeah, yeah, listen... ..he started bringing other women back. Wait, while...
While you were there? I haven't... told that to anyone. Except Eileen. Hey. Oh... I saw nothing! Where did you move the car to? Louis? Daniel! He left his coat. Come on, Mary! - Daniel, just don't let her drive.
- I won't let her near. Have you got your phone
and everything? She's a liability. We'll fill her up
before we bring her back. Thank you so much. - Hello?
- Louis? - Hello, Mary.
- Hi. Erm... Er... whereabouts are you? Well, I can't talk on the phone
because I'm not very good at driving. Bye, Mary. Oh. He won't be able to handle the motorway,
Mary. He just won't. Hi, Louis. Hi, Louis. Can you stop the car? No, I have to practise my driving. Why? I'm taking Pádraig Murphy's remains
to Rathlin Island so he can be buried with his brother. The police don't want us to do that.
They told us. - Now, put your foot on the brake.
- Sarah said that sometimes you have to do what you think's right,
even though others say it isn't. I didn't know you knew how to drive. - Frank is teaching me.
- Well, you're doing great. Just put your foot on the brake
in the middle. Finished talking. I have to drive on the road now. What? No... - No, Louis!
- What are you doing? Stop! - Daniel, move.
- No, no, no, no! - Get out of the way, Daniel!
- Stop the car! - He's not frozen peas.
- Are you doing this to punish me? It's not about you. Louis, nobody gave me a choice. He's not Green Isle garden peas,
450 grams. - Daniel...
- Stay out of this, Mary! - Louis!
- Daniel! Jeez, Louis... I need you to help me here. Sarah said that you only ever
think about yourself. - She said that to you?
- I heard her say it to Frank. "New York is a very big place to be if the only person that's looking
after you is an %*#." Louis, I'm not an... I'm not an... OK. OK. Let's... Let's do this together. All right? - OK?
- Yeah. OK. Come on. Get out of the car.
We'll do it together. Thank you. All right. Maybe we should take the van.
The police are looking for this car. You don't know what time they left? No. APB on Volvo. - It's got a budgie coffin on the roof.
- A coffin for budgies? No, not a coffin for budgies!
A coffin with budgies on it! If you miss this,
you're a shower of %*#ing incompetents. Six safety awards, Louis. Which is apparently unprecedented. Just gonna go around.
It's easier to get in this way, anyway. - It's very high here.
- Yeah, but the views are great. APB on second vehicle. - Yellow Toyota.
- Yellow Toyota van. 1-6-1-Kildaire... 1-6-1-Kilo-Echo. ..7-8-9-6. Hi, this is Ger, don't leave a message,
I won't listen to it. Contact Carla at the off... Do you know what? When I woke up this
morning, I didn't think I'd be doing this. Now that I think about it,
I can't live with myself not doing it. Louis - the most decent man in Ireland. %*#. I'm just imagining Eileen's face
when she hears. I'm not sure I want to picture
Ger's face if I have to tell him I can't come in on Monday because I've
been arrested for kidnapping a corpse. - It's gonna be fine.
- It'll be fine. It'll be fine. Louis, Anna can come visit you in New York
any time and you can go see her. A long-distance relationship
isn't a real relationship. We're gonna make it work. - OK, Louis?
- Mary. You look at Daniel
like Anna looks at me in photos. Jesus, thanks for that! Stop. Sarah said Daniel's
never had a proper girlfriend. Really? Never? - Not since...
- Katharine Reynolds. Katharine Reynolds is a physicist. Really? Go, Katie. You're really talented, Louis. Why didn't you want to be my dad? Would you be my dad if I was normal? Louis... It had nothing to do with... We didn't even know you were... - Different.
- Different. In the most amazing way. You know, you'd sit for hours with me
when I was studying, in your own little chair beside me. What other three-year-old could do that? You got me through the exams. Louis, listen to me, OK? We were in high school. Her parents
put a lot of pressure on Katie, your biological mum. And we were 15. Aretha Franklin was 13
when she had her son. - She raised him.
- OK. Katie was gonna put you up for adoption. And Mum - Sarah -
thought this would be best for all of us. So... I'm really sorry. Would you like to meet Katharine? Louis? - No headphones for a minute.
- Finished talking now. If my brother hadn't spoken to me
in 30 years, I'd turn in my grave if I thought
I'd be buried beside him. So you're saying
Daniel should stay out of it and let Pádraig Murphy
be buried in Cork? Oh, my God, they're talking about us! ..whatever his name - Daniel, is it? Just buried his ma a few days ago. So maybe it's like his reaction
to her death. He should see a counsellor, Joe, not go
running around the bleedin' country. You might have something.
But I understand he's with his brother. - Do you know what?
- What are you doing? I'm sick of this.
Someone has to defend us. If a charity did this, there would be
absolutely no questions asked. And there should be a charity to do this. What's gonna happen
to the next Pádraig? I'm gonna say that. Seriously, from a legal point of view,
anything you say... Don't, don't, don't. Mary, just give me the phone.
Louis, take the phone. - Anything you say will...
- Mary, put your seat belt on. Take the phone! - Take the damn phone!
- Pull over. We're the ones taking Pádraig home. Hello? - Sir, they're on Joe Duffy.
- Very good, Sheila. You need a sense of humour
to survive as a Garda. - Sir, listen.
..trying to do, Joe. Otherwise he's gonna be buried
in an unmarked grave miles from home. Exactly what he was trying
to save his brother from. But Daniel only met him on the plane,
right? I mean, what business is it of his? That's just the type of person he is.
He's kind and thoughtful. - Mary!
- Even if he doesn't seem it at first. Hang up the %*#ing phone! Apologies, everyone, for that language. I'd like to remind Daniel,
this is daytime radio. We shouldn't... I'll say this for her.
She knows how to pick them, God love her. - A bit of Christmas spirit, please.
- Mary, hang the %*# up now! Phones are lighting up with the story
of Pádraig and his brother Tommy. Mary, I have Detective Donall Crowley
on the line. Folks, listen,
we have a live hostage negotiation. A hostage negotiation?
You're joking me! This is a rescue! Would you call them fugitives,
Detective? We need legal advice here. - It's no negotiation!
- %*#ing listen to me! Surrender Mr Murphy's
remains immediately... - Give me the phone.
- Just one second. ..or you will be charged
with obstruction of justice and preventing the lawful burial
of a corpse. We're trying to bury him,
you %*#ing gob%*#⚫️e! Please top up your credit. - Thank God for that.
..buried in a trench. That's what New York Council does! We would do better for him
than a cardboard box. Cardboard caskets are eco-friendly
and they're not %*#ing cheap! It's a radio, Mary, not a phone.
They can't hear you. ..wondering whether Pádraig Murphy's body
is going to make it to his... The nerve of them. - So give us a call.
- The arrogance. Noble act or a shocking crime? I have to say I'm with Daniel and Mary
on this, not on the cardboard... Are they not, in their own way,
trying to do a decent thing? Why don't you come back to me
with your opinions when you're more than
a %*#ing week on the job? - How are ya, John?
- Donall, how are ya? - Is it that shower again?
- No IRA involved this time. - Thank %*# for that.
- As far as we know. Whatever you need, Donall,
the PSNI is at your service. Well, don't shoot, sir,
they're not armed! It's Northern Ireland, Sheila,
not %*#ing Mexico. "Don't shoot." Father, I promise you,
it's not political. It's all been a misunderstanding
and um... it's sorted out. Whatever it is, we've got
reporters asking a million questions. That was not part of the plan, Father,
believe me. Well... I'll wait as long as I can. Great. Thank you. Which, what with the weather
and the light, will be four o'clock. Get him here to me for then.
Good man. %*#⚫️, he said four.
What time is it now? 2:05. We're bang on schedule. We're like three trains, aren't we, Louis? We're people, Mary. We're gonna make it. - %*#⚫️.
- What? You weren't on the news, Louis.
They don't know what you look like. 2-4-8-2. You can do this. - 2-4-8-2.
- 2-4-8-2. - He'll be fine, right?
- Yeah, he'll be fine. He does this all the time with Mum. Did it. All right, he's gonna be fine. Uh-oh. %*#⚫️! You all right? - Are we good?
- It said cash only. Is he thick? I guarantee you
he's ten times smarter than you. Do you take euros? - Are you thick too?
- You little... - Da!
- Do we have a problem here? Your son is being very offensive, sir. Pay no mind.
He takes that from his mammy. Derek. Citizen's arrest, son. - Go, go, go, go, go! Run, Louis!
- You have the right to remain silent! - Mary! Drive!
- Anything you say can and %*#ing will be used
against you in a court of law! You %*#er! I'll break your legs! Come back! You have the right to an attorney! - Where the %*# is she going?
- If you can't afford one, tough %*#⚫️e! Come here, you wee %*#ers! - Mary!
- Come back and let me hit you! Mary's not very good at driving, Daniel. Come back!
I'll break your %*#ing necks! He's giving up. I've got to help Mary now.
You keep running, you're doing great! Mary! Mary! - Let's switch!
- Why? I'm doing grand. - Just hit the brake!
- The brakes are broken! The brake is not the accelerator! - They're broken!
- Mary! Fantastic Day PSNI just spotted them. This has now
become an international incident. He's OK. I'm so sorry. Louis! Turn off that %*#ing song! I'm so sorry, Pádraig. No, Mary. I'm sorry. This all got way out of hand. Let's carry him. - What?
- Let's carry him. - Louis, give us a hand!
- OK. Just go up. Up. Push, push, push.
Push, Mary. - Go up.
- OK. - Yeah, like that.
- Are we good? Jesus. Oh, God. OK. Yeah, like that. The Taoiseach's office
is asking me about this. The %*#ing Taoiseach's office, Crowley! I was led to believe you're not a moron.
Can you assure me of that? I need to hear you say it. - I'm not a moron.
- Then sort this out, for %*#'s sake! That is not the conversation
I expected to have with the Chief Superintendent
at this stage in my career, Sheila. Far from it. - Mary?
- Yeah? Will you come visit me and Daniel
in New York, like Anna, Mary? Uh, how long have you
been going out, Louis? Three months, eight days, and five hours. - We're having %*#, Mary.
- What? You're having what? - %*# intercourse.
- Jesus! Three months and eight days is not a long
time for you to be together to have %*#. Mary, help me here, will you? %*# is better
the more you know the person. She's my best friend. I have nine friends
including Frank and Daniel. She's my favourite one. Well, you obviously know about
contraception, which is good. Durex Extra Sensitive
are rated most dependable. You need an off button. But in terms of sensitivity,
reliability and comfort, the Crown Skinless Skin is unmatched
and is used extensively in %*# films. - We're talking about %*# now?
- Would you prefer to be a granddad? Not really, Mary, no. That's Rathlin. Slowly, slowly. Sorry, Pádraig. Where do you think the ferry is? We're %*#ed, aren't we? Just gonna take some photos. Be careful, Louis. Whoa. What do you think
will happen to him now? Not too close to the edge! We saw you on the news. Do youse want a lift? This trailer has not won
any safety awards. I know you can do this. Sarah would want us to help Pádraig,
wouldn't she? - Come on.
- Louis, I'm not driving, Helen is. Give me your hand. Just keep looking at me, Louis.
And remember why we're doing this. Cos he's not a bag
of Green Isle garden peas, 450 grams. Daniel, you have to tell me
what Sarah told me on days I don't want to
get out of bed and go to school. - I don't know it, Louis.
- OK, I'll say it to you. She told me that everyone has negative
thoughts and it's not just me. Some days they're a lot worse
than other days. I just... have to overcome them. And then I get out of bed
and go to school. Tell me that on the days I don't want to
get out of bed and go to school. OK. Come on, Louis. Just grab my hand
and then it's just one step at a... Urgh! We have another supporter.
Someone's gonna loan us a boat. This is mad! Pádraig, your carriage awaits. All right. Would you look, it's the lads! Go on, lads, you're nearly there! Do you want to swim over to them, Sheila? You're an absolute %*#ing hero! You got him here at last!
Good man, Daniel. In the name of the Father, the Son,
and the Holy Ghost... - Dark soon.
- It's OK, Louis. Look at the sky. - Come on, lads!
- It's gonna be OK. Let's be having you. You have to grab it from underneath.
One, two, three, up we go. Straight up. There we go. That's it. Got him. This is the story of two
brothers who were estranged in life now to be reunited... Father, my erm... Louis needs a quiet place.
Would you have a quiet place for him? - Sure.
- Come on, Louis. Two brothers traveling across Ireland
to bury two brothers. This is James Casey,
reporting live from Rathlin Island. Now back to the studio. I'm sure Pádraig wouldn't mind you using
his house while we get things ready. He spent every penny he had
to get Tommy home. It would've meant a great deal to him - what you've done for him,
is what I'm trying to say. The less you know the better, Father. - Thank you.
- Father. Come on in. We made it, Louis. - Daniel?
- Yeah? How far is the drive
from your apartment to my new school? Let's talk about all that stuff
when we get back home. The drive to Clonakilty Community School was between 13 to 19 minutes,
depending on traffic. Louis, we'll talk about it
when we get back, OK? Is it less than 13 minutes
or longer than 19 minutes? Because... I have my porridge
at 7:55 on a school day. It's quite a bit longer. How many minutes longer?
Longer than 20 minutes? It's about... three hours... ..to get there. That's too long. Yeah, but you see, the thing is,
you wouldn't have to do it every day. - Putting me in a home.
- No, Louis, it's not a home. It's a boarding school. It's a really good one.
You're gonna like it. I knew Daniel would do this to me.
I knew Daniel would do this to me. It's a really, really good school. Louis, you get to finish math,
you can get ready for college. %*# off! %*# off! %*# off! - Louis!
- %*# off! Just leave him alone. - No, no, no, no, no.
- Stop! Please stop, Louis, please. Get away, please. - Give him some space. He needs space.
- Yeah, I am. Go away. - It's not a home.
- %*# off. - It's a school.
- It's OK. Just wait outside, will you? Daniel, would you just please get out? Did you hit your head? - Donall, how are you doing?
- How are you? The sooner we get them buried,
the sooner we get this crowd dispersed. Get them buried? I'm taking Pádraig Murphy's remains
back to Cork with me. - Come on, Donall. Surely you're not?
- Come on, John. Surely I am. And I'm arresting Daniel Murphy
and that brother of his. Where are they? - Hello, Father.
- Ah. I'm with Detective Crowley there.
I'm Garda Sheila O'Neill. - I remember. We spoke on the...
- We did. Hey. - I think he'll be OK.
- Right, you're an expert now, are you? I'm sorry.
I'm honestly just trying to help. Yeah, well, don't. It's none of your business. You think I'm an %*#?
This is what's best for him. I don't think... What? Say it, Mary. Don't get shy now. - What?
- I'm just surprised. I'm just surprised that you think
this is what's best. He should be in college.
His teachers in Clon, they let him get away with stuff
and he's smarter than anyone. I know. What's best for both of you
is what I'm trying to say. Just leave me alone, OK? Daniel, it's gonna be OK. For %*#'s sake, Mary,
how can you know that? Huh? How do you know that? I don't know. Does it... %*#. Does it feel like
that this is a good idea? Yes. Yes, what else
am I supposed to do? You don't know what it's like
to have an autistic... - ..to have a...
- A son. Son. Am I supposed to take advice from
someone who thinks so little of herself that she travels across the country
for some guy she lets %*# God knows how many women
while she's in the other room? %*# you. May I remind you,
you're out of jurisdiction here. That body is the state property
of the Republic of Ireland and if you touch it, you will have
a diplomatic incident on your hands. - For %*#'s sake.
- What? I'm... I'm sorry, sir.
But what's the crime here? Look, Sheila, we can't have people disregarding the direct orders
of the Gardai just... because. I have his solicitor telling me
he's acting irrationally because of grief. Yes! - If we all did that, where would we be?
- In a better place. - Detective!
- Ah! This is my fault.
Please leave them out of this. - I made a mess of getting him here.
- You made an absolute hames of it. Whatever I did, whatever you think of me, promise me you'll bury Pádraig Murphy
next to his brother. He belongs... He belongs where Cork City Council
sees fit. Now, you do not have to say anything
that may harm... Come on, he should be
next to his brother. He's more than a bag of %*#ing peas! Sir. What? If doing something good
for your fellow man is a crime... ..I don't think I have what it takes
to be a Garda. Oh, for %*#'s sake, Sheila! Here. Give me strength. Look at us - hiding from the world. Mary, do you think I'm a coward? God, no! No. I didn't mean... Navigating the world is hard enough
when you're... normal. Whatever that means. Louis, I think you're a hero. I want to thank Daniel... ..Mary and Louis
for bringing Pádraig home. And I want to thank each
and every one of you for coming. At this time of year,
we give a lot of things. But what you've given today
is your presence. In life, Pádraig had a difficult
relationship with his brother. It pained him that they were separated
by more than just the Atlantic Ocean. And then, in death,
Pádraig's brother Tommy... ..lay for 12 years
on an island cut off from life, ..hidden from society. But now he's being buried
on another island. And you need only
look around you to see... Mary... was it a bad thing that I didn't go... ..to Mum's grave? No. No, because she knows
just how much you loved her. You know that, Louis? - Hey.
- But their legacy is this. It's you. Whatever impulse
made you come here today... ..cherish it... let it grow. Because... that is love. And... that... is... life. In the name of the Father,
the Son, and the Holy Ghost. Take care. Hey, get in the front, will you?
I don't want to look like your chauffer. - Hello?
- Detective, this is Frank Delaney here. I've just come from
the Attorney General's Office. Lawyers' tea party, was it? I've a proposal they're happy with
if you are. He just donates to a charity,
and that's it? Thought you'd be happy. So does that mean they're free to fly? Yeah, I suppose. Thanks. - Careful using the mixer next time.
- Yeah. No metal objects. Hey, Carla, yes. Uh... I'm so sorry. Just please tell Ger that I'm on it, OK? Louis, I need you to come home
with me tomorrow, OK? I am home. - Hey, Louis...
- Daniel, %*# off! What about our deal, huh? %*#. Thank you, Frank, for everything. I don't know what your mum
would've made of it all. I think she'd have been
aiding and abetting. God, what I wouldn't have done to have
met your mum when I was your age. Not sure what my dad would've thought. Ah, no. - I wasn't thinking. No, I mean...
- Frank. Louis told me that Mum was trying to book
tickets to come and visit me in New York. Yeah, she wanted to talk to you about... Louis... and... with Louis...
and the three of you about... ..you know. I could've done with
a little bit of a heads up there. That he knew. That you knew. Look, Daniel, uh... I'm in uncharted territory here and uh... and it doesn't make what I'm going
to say next any easier, but... - Louis doesn't want to go to New York.
- Can we talk about this tomorrow? I've got so much stuff to pack. All this... He's asked me to speak to you
on his behalf. He wants to be free
to make his own decisions, make his own choices without you. Was that his decision or your suggestion? For %*#'s sake,
I don't want to be interfering but... So what, he's saying that he...
he what? Look, as a solution, I can move in here
with him and help him with his maths. I've grown very fond of him.
And he trusts me. And I think your mum
would've been OK with that. It's a solution. Hm? He may not get his maths this year,
but he'll get them next year. Then we can reassess
and we can talk then. I can get him into a day school. And, you know, %*# math.
He can just do a photography course. There are a ton of those in Manhattan. He can do whatever he wants. - But he just needs...
- Daniel! This is where he should be. He's not going. I'm sorry. - I shouldn't have said what I said.
- Yeah. Um... You know, I um... I have to pay a fine to a charity and I couldn't find the one that's right. So I'm setting one up
for people without next of kin - for the next Pádraig - and I was wondering
if you'd be interested in... You know, you could run it. - It was just an idea.
- It's a nice idea. You could call it Save The Stiff. I was also thinking that maybe...
Louis can help you with it? Yeah. Louis is staying here. With Frank. It's what Louis wants. It's... It's what's best for him. And I should've...
I should've seen that earlier. But I'll be back soon. Maybe we can just... ..get a cup of coffee, or... just grab a drink. You know, go out for dinner. I think we should just leave things here. Thanks for this. You know when you asked me
what I was sorry about? I wasn't fully honest. What I'm mostly sorry about, Louis, is that I never thanked Mum and Dad
for keeping you in my life. So I'm not gonna let you
negotiate yourself out of it, OK? Louis, I want to... I want to be here... to tell you that thing that makes you
go to school when you don't want to go. Will you let me? No, the other one! - The happy one!
- This was her favourite. %*#ing 83 and she drives that
like she stole it. Mary, you're going too fast. But I'm doing... I'm doing
all right besides that, aren't I? - Hi, Mary.
- It's pretty appropriate. You're a brave woman, Eileen. Yeah, well, you're in no position
to be making a joke at my expense. Sorry. If you're looking to practise,
maybe you can drop us home? I don't want a lift from you, Mary.
I'll walk home. - OK.
- I'll take a lift. I'm feeling brave. You'd want to be feeling brave
wearing that thing. - Oh, my God, is this our old PE kit?
- Yep. How does it still even fit you? - It doesn't. The arms are too tight.
- It fits me, all right? It's short on his legs.
You need a new tracksuit, Daniel. You guys don't know
what you're talking about. It fits fine! - Stretch your arms out.
- Like this? - Can you do this?
- Yeah, I can do this. Yeah, but can you raise them up high? This is an outrage!
It %*#ing fits! Right, Louis? Right?
