It Came From Tumblr 9 [Binge Compilation]

people in their 20s still refer to older people than them as adults when you think they stop and realize they are adults I am NOT an adult I am a child with a drinking permit 90% sure megundal retired the day she sent out James seriesis Hogwarts letter because no [ __ ] way she is teaching a boy named James Sirius Potter a blind named Jane series Potter whose mother was who easly a boy who is a mixture of Potter Evans and Weasley raised on the stories of marauders and Fred and George and his mother and father and their friends a boy with a map and invisibility cloak and probably no sense of personal danger yep sign me up for retirement Birbal Park grab huge orange maybe my personal favorite is Park I had a dream that you were my therapist but all you did was call me a [ __ ] [ __ ] dreams do come true three stages of life not the time for a dad joke oh he's ready a box of baby bangles what no I'm sorry I ordered half a dozen mini bagels no shut up we're keeping them my blog is not a safe space I put landmines everywhere and I have no [ __ ] idea where I put them please [ __ ] out mate let's have phone sex over walkie-talkies banned over things literally everyone regardless of gender looks good in suits lacy lingerie eyeliner ball gowns brothel armor the blood of your enemies flannel shirts with sleeves rolled up glasses this post went from zero to ten back to zero real fast they took the children they took everything and yes food what a shame what a shame the poor grooms bride is us more is this the Kidz Bop version if it is I probably listen to it the difference between the artwork of the lizalfos and the actual lizalfos models and ocarina time was it is still so [ __ ] funny to me artwork huge muscular lizard man that could crush your head between his thighs in-game funny little lizard the lakes the scream hey if you can't handle matters then you sure as hell don't deserve matters bro and now a presentation on thighs pros extra squishy super great pillow looking really good in skirts dresses shorts etc they jiggle soft could crush a watermelon literally anything else cons perfect look at them today my anthro professor said something kind of really beautiful you all have a little bit of I want to save the world on you that's why you're here in college I want you to know that it's okay if you only say one person and it's okay if that person is you I feel like a few people I know could stand to read this yeah actually I kind of needed that so thank you I was gonna end with the thighs bit but no this this is a nice way to end it so you finally arrived what the hell is that it's my ass-kicking outfit [ __ ] I put it down on the grill you've got to learn how to pick it up to link the hero of time has been dead for 100 [ __ ] 30 years go to hell I already exist on a level of Hell exists near mine let me see what you have don't do anything I would do and definitely don't do anything I wouldn't do there is a little grey window in there for you to operate in fact the tens of thousands of hylians refused to send me their rupees is sickening grow up your face looks familiar have I threatened you before I never considered you arrival I never considered you at all now that's just hurtful no matter how insecure shitty you feel just remember that my muscles are massive and I can punch through walls thanks Derek see ya I just killed a guy totally on purpose this time I'll just keep on going and not think about it oh my god it a while since I've done one of these today's space orc story is brought to you by the one and only the Impala Lord check him out on tumblr I remember the war with humanity it was our first and last mistake the last war of the drys the war that destroyed us I was barely a hat sewing at the time the war started barely enough to understand what the politicians were saying never mind understand the intricacies of intergalactic politics it was some dispute about colonization rights some big trivial and unimportant but something we foolishly thought was that destroying a human vessel was worth it I remember the first days of the war the propaganda on the big screens the pictures of our soldiers on the front lines winning victory after victory the comparison of the primitive human weapons to our advanced technology they showed us for draggled human prisoners after they surrendered made them read statements of aggression and war guilt for the news feats but those vids never told us that for every one human they killed they killed a tenth of us we took the world we wanted then got greedy and took some more the humans were professionals but we had numbers city after city fell beneath our guns enslaved human populations turned out weapons for use on their own kind what's even as we broke their fleet Ackley's on send their ships into that dying star we realized we were losing every world we took they made us pay in tenfold they sent assassins behind our lines to kill our leaders small units of soldiers to sabotage our factories we learned that we had stretched ourselves too thin against an enemy that refused to lose we fell back with nowhere left to go the only world select were ours I watched as the humans scattered our fleets in the upper atmosphere the burning husks of our ships filling the skies the smell of ozone as an orbital Lance annihilated a military base not ten kilometers from where I stood look of shame as the Grand Council transmitted our complete and utter surrender and I remember to the first time I saw you tall and upright a Giants of muscle and bone the eyes of a predator on the hunt I remember him gesturing me over to him and the certainty of my death filling my mind I was a child but I was prepared to die for the Driesell sacrifice to allow the humans to take their fully justified revenge upon us [Music] and I remember my first taste of the chocolate bar he gave me the human revenge was totally from the ruins they built schools and roads hospitals and sanitation plants the human engineer brought running water free of parasites to my family stack for the first time they annihilated us against diseases the council had never bothered to cure they wrought revenge with words we never heard democracy freedom Brotherhood they wrought it in the form of human rights and most powerfully of all forgiveness and their revenge was total within 10 years human children and Driesell were playing together on the fields outside school 15 they were fighting alongside against the shoe Lama 40 years from the day the humans landed on our worlds and the drives will no longer exist admitted to humanity nominated by Terrence and approved by unanimous decision of the human Parliament the six species to gain such an honor the drys will no longer exist but humanity grew stronger yes I remember our war with humanity our last and best mistake president Steven as illy of the Driesell giving a speech celebrating the 20th anniversary of the drizzles admit it's to humanity possible outcome 71 ending transmission this is but one of the many outcomes the human race could have on our universe sure they brought peace but at what cost computer keep searching for an outcome or all sides have a happy ending of course captain takes the next century I'll find one where nobody has to die as much maybe chasing a fool's dream but humans taught me how to be stubborn learn how to use it pray for me y'all almost there y'all mind if I I may be trash but I'm high-quality trash Premium trash great a trash the kind of trash your mom would look at and say should this be recycling yeah I'm that kind of trash my brother tried to pick up a banana to make it look like he was talking on the phone but all the bananas of the bunch came with it and he just looked at me I went I guess the conference call hey boss plus recovery don't encourage him where do you get Cheetos that big that's a chihuahua those are carrots this post is a mess do you ever eat some disappointing junk food and it's like I'm clogging my arteries for this things on this site are so oddly specific yet accurate so I went to the bathroom at Chili's and it was super air-conditioned in there I was by myself and said wow it's really cold in here and then followed it up with one might say it's chilly and I realized this is it this is why I'm single I make puns to myself in an empty bathroom if that is not the biggest mood I don't know what is one time we got a new kid in fifth grade and he walks right in and sticks his hand under the stapler and staples his hand and just looks at the teacher and goes I'm going to the nurse and leaves everyone who died at the Battle of Hogwarts missed all star by Smash Mouth released two days later so much to do so much to see why do you laugh when you say anything negative about yourself cuz honestly it's hilarious how incompetent I am [ __ ] look at me I'm sick of people thinking to your it is optional I'm sick of people thinking that they can judge others on normal bodily functions and that the only way they can be accepted is to wear something that's harmful / poisonous to your body just because some men and the 1880s decided bodily odor was no longer acceptable [ __ ] you stink you never been to an anime convention have you okay but did it need the lightening her name is storm not light showers with a Chance of Sun your toes sink deep into the sands it is quiet here it is soft you're safe in the embrace of the waves no bro bro bro bro that's that that that's quick said what no the floors just hugging me if you fancy get that there like button and he'll why are you here give that subscribe button a click - did you post this with the intention of making us all stop and actually read this in our mind with that voice posted this with the intention of porting you and the goddamn dirt real friendship is when your friends come over to your house and then you both just take a nap and /or flop somewhere comfortable and tumble and not talk much except to show each other some stupid thing you found online yep I feel sorry for this photographer he tried to make a nice scenic view of a pyramid and this Campbell comes along on his nestor bidding was smoking weed called master blazing no it's called hijack and guys know it's weed wagon no it's called disappointing your mother can you explain what fire has no idea what it is simplest terms please I can be an idiot sometimes hey first off don't call yourself an idiot second strategy RPG where characters can permanently die in game also filled with pretty people that sometimes you can make babies with who also travel back in time to fight in your army I mean it's a few installments there's some installments where you play is the second generation because the first generation dies how can you like Celica would have perfectly good kaguro is right in front of you one beautiful red hair - possibly red from the blood of our enemies three damaged sprite is not a low no damage horror feed service for look at her she is a strong independent woman who don't need no arm and possibly Milla daily routine has basically become coffee email check Effie hero's auditions workout regimen workout dinner make videos and sleep what's your favorite voice acting job that you have had or have sorry if somebody already asked us I don't know if anyone has Q for Michaela laws male adaptation of honey pop on YouTube hunky pop oh that thirsty fairy I adore him I haven't played any of the Fire Emblem games yet give me a reason to cute girls that turn into dragons enough said sometimes it gets a little creepy where you can end up marrying and having children with some of the key of dragons because there's one game where you do that and looks like she's 12 and that's a that was a hot-button issue but the upside is she made one of the strongest children units in the game so I heard the words pre-order Assassin's Creed Odyssey and get your very own unicorn AC fandom the [ __ ] is going on with your game series who is the goodest boy all signs point to this one me after dark elf avatar keeps dying on skyrim legendary mode I am 100% dunmer so you think of persona cool story lovely characters without missing something if you must know I did have a lunch today I had a lovely bean gazpacho your breath smells like iced coffee like I said bean guess spot show what's your favorite show and/or song show Bojack horseman but also equally hate it because of how well it handles mental issues and song losing my mind of my mystery skulls and in case you needed to hear today you're gonna be okay keep on fighting you're a lot stronger than you think like I Travis on my street went from [ __ ] boy to comic relief to main antagonist so fast I mean two years but yeah you should do a Fallout playthrough but with a mod that removes the voices and you should fill them in yourself for the females yeah I know you're smart if I did that every male character would just sound like Patrick or Borden have you seen my son Peter this isn't a question but I am blaming the quality of your videos for my failed test great tomorrow you will live with this guilt on your heart forever north east south west for some reason these are the funniest things to me like let's take North and West between them is Northwest but you can go further between North West and West is West Northwest but if you go north from there you go Northwest Northwest oh my God my head hurts people love Tumblr and YouTube look at this good boy this boy can't have treat sadly I've gotten a total of 12 hours of sleep in the past week is that healthy I mean doctors say when you go 72 hours without sleep you go clinically insane refrigerators are just domesticated winter have a nice day wait how dare just how dare that's it oh my god spider-man spider-man does whatever a spider can everything's going dark I don't feel good mr. stark Oh No what is Seto Kaiba Chazz Princeton and Jack Atlas seem like a Pokemon that gets to see reached you know what really gets my goat El Chupacabra where does Captain Hook go to get a new hook this secondhand store or he can always Panhandle for one or find work as a handyman well I've really got to hand it to you guys I don't care if you don't like space puns I like space puns come at me bro unsure of how to confess your love to someone try this one acquire several dozen limes to go up to them and drop all the limes three start picking them up but keep dropping them the clumsier you look the better for keep doing this until you have their attention this could take out the thirty minutes trust me five gather up all the limes try looking a bit sheepish six look them deeply in the eyes and say sorry I'm bad at pick-up limes seven marry them soup that tastes great is super may I interest you in a bowl of canned you not name one fragrance commercial that has ever made sense what are you talking about they all makes sense shut the [ __ ] up how much can a whale ejaculate the average whale usually ejaculates as much as 300 gallons of semen thank you you're welcome the sexual tension when you and your crush are online on FB at the same time and you just stare at their little green dot and suddenly you know what Gatsby felt like ah [ __ ] get me making a new passwords like beef stew sorry password not strong enough oh my god I'm good at math you plus I equals 69 wait that would mean that I equals 59 because you sure are ten oh now you plus I equals 145 as the atomic number for uranium is 92 and the atomic number for I is 53 cuz we got chemistry for God's sakes why are all these people so smooth migraine where do you buy the Dark Lord at the Valda Mart my friend really changed when she became a vegetarian it's like I've never seen her before I sighed so loud my mom asked me if I was okay and she was two rooms away you know that there's a theory that no two people see a color the exact same way does that mean the color is like a pigment of your imagination you [ __ ] dudes I hate you all

Channel: P.M. Seymour

Views: 445,097

Rating: 4.9604931 out of 5

Keywords: voice, audio, P.M. Seymour, aphmau, mystreet, comedy, reading, minecraft mystreet, dollastic, Tumblr

Id: htCecBvG3yU

Length: 20min 17sec (1217 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 05 2018