EDDIE WAS THE BEST
I EVER SEEN PLAY THE GAME. THE WHOLE TOWN KNEW HIM. SINCE BASEBALL HAS BEEN
TAKEN FROM HIS LIFE, HE HAS BEEN
COMPLETELY LOST. CHEERS. HE HAS A GAMBLING
PROBLEM. I HAVE A FEELING
I'M IN BAD SHAPE. HE'S STOLEN
FROM MY SISTER. HE STOLE
MY PARENTS' CREDIT CARD. TO LIVE OUT OF
A GYM BAG AT
32 YEARS OLD. WHAT YOU GOT? HE'S THE EPITOME
OF A SCUMBAG. MY DAD, TO THIS DAY, WILL THROW BASEBALL
IN HIS FACE. IT'S NOT RIGHT, EDDIE.
THIS IS AN AMBUSH. MY DAD CAN'T
GET OVER IT. WE GOT TO RELIVE
ALL THE THINGS THAT I HAVE DONE
TO [BLEEP] UP. ARE YOU EVER GOING
TO FORGIVE ME? THAT WAS LIKE
A KNIFE. WE WERE A TEAM. TO YOU, I POSE
ONE QUESTION. WILL YOU
ACCEPT TREATMENT
AND GET HELP TODAY? I NEED A MINUTE. [SNIFFLING] [EXHALES] COME HERE. I NEED--
I NEED A MINUTE. YEAH, GIVE HIM--
GIVE HIM A MINUTE. [SOBS] [INDISTINCT TALKING] THANKS. MY NAME IS BRIAN,
AND I'M EDDIE'S
YOUNGER BROTHER. SO, LIKE, THIS IS THE BEGINNINGS
OF BASEBALL STUFF. MY BROTHER FOCUSED EVERYTHING
INTO BECOMING THE BEST BASEBALL PLAYER
THAT HE COULD. THIS WAS WHEN
HE WENT TO THE-- HE PLAYED ON THE BABE RUTH
WORLD SERIES TEAM. VERY PROUD PARENTS THERE
WITH MY BROTHER AT A DUKE GAME. THIS IS WHEN
HE WON HIS FIRST TEAM, ALL-ACC CONFERENCE
AND ALL-AMERICA AWARD. HE DIDN'T MAKE IT
TO THE MAJOR LEAGUES, THIS IS HIS LIFE,
OR WHAT'S LEFT OF IT, OR THE OLD LIFE--
WHAT WAS LEFT OF
HIS GOOD LIFE. IF SOMEBODY WERE
TO ASK ME IF
I'M AN ALCOHOLIC, I WOULD PROBABLY
ANSWER NO. [GRUNTS] I DON'T FEEL THE NEED
TO DRINK, YOU KNOW. I ENJOY A COLD BEER. INITIALLY,
I FEEL GREAT. THERE'S ALMOST
A SENSE OF RELEASE. IT DOES HAVE
A CALMING, SOOTHING, ALMOST RELAXING FEELING
AND SENSATION TO IT, AND I THOROUGHLY ENJOY
THAT FEELING. THERE'S BEEN NO QUESTION
IN MY MIND THAT
HE'S AN ALCOHOLIC. HE HAS BEEN
IN DENIAL ABOUT IT
A LONG TIME. CHEERS.
CHEERS. BEER IS SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE. I LIKE TO DO IT.
IT'S NOT ILLEGAL. I DON'T FEEL LIKE
I'M NECESSARILY DOING
ANYTHING WRONG. WHEN YOU DO IT TO,
YOU KNOW, GET SO OBLITERATED
AND INCOHERENT THAT YOU CAN'T FORM
A SENTENCE? LIKE,
THAT'S NOT ACCEPTABLE. AND WHEN EDDIE DRINKS,
HE DRINKS TO GET WASTED. [LAUGHTER] YOU LOSER! [LAUGHTER]
[INDISTINCT] THE RATE HE DRINKS,
IT'S LITERALLY, LIKE, WOW, BUDDY.
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU CAN STILL TALK
RIGHT NOW. YOU KNOW? OR YOU CAN MOVE. THE VERY TALL GENTLEMAN
OVER THERE, I ACTUALLY BET HIM $100 THAT I COULD DRINK
A PINT OF BEER
FASTER THAN HIM. I BELIEVE HE HAS
A GAMBLING PROBLEM. HE SPORTS BETS. I BELIEVE HE GOES
TO THE CASINO. WHETHER YOU'RE BLUFFING
OR YOU HAVE A BIG HAND, YOU KNOW,
IT'S THE BEST. WHAT DO YOU GO? [INDISTINCT] Woman:
ED'S CLEANING HOUSE
A LITTLE BIT. [INDISTINCT] I HAVE A FEELING
I'M IN BAD SHAPE. HE'S STOLEN
FROM MY SISTER. HE STOLE
MY PARENTS' CREDIT CARD. [LAUGHTER] HIM AND
A GOOD FRIEND OF HIS GOT THEMSELF INVOLVED
IN A HIGH ROLLER GAME, AND WE HAD TO
WESTERN UNION
MONEY TO HIM, BAILING HIM OUT
OF BEING STUPID
WHILE HE'S DRUNK. DRINKING ALCOHOL HAS
CERTAINLY COMPLICATED
MY LIFE. I NEED
A SHOT OF BLACKHOUSE, AND I NEED A LAGER. I THINK ABOUT HAVING
TO SAY, "I'M SORRY" TO SOMEBODY'S FAMILY
THAT HE KILLS SOMEDAY, I FIND THAT HORRIBLE. Ed: WHETHER IT BE
A TRAFFIC FATALITY OR SOMETHING UGLY, I KNOW THAT
IF SOMETHING AIN'T DONE, I'M GOING TO BURY HIM. [CROWD WHOOPING
AND CHEERING] HE'S ON SUCH
A ROAD TO DESTRUCTION THAT HE IS
A LOST, LOST SOUL. I DON'T THINK I'LL EVER
UNDERSTAND, YOU KNOW,
WHY IT CAME TO THIS. I DON'T THINK I WILL. THE DAY EDDIE WAS BORN, PROBABLY ONE OF
THE HAPPIEST TIMES
OF MY LIFE. FROM THE TIME HE COULD--
HE WAS CRAWLING, IF THERE WAS A BALL,
HE WAS CRAWLING AFTER IT. WHEN HE WAS 2, HE WENT TO
THE PHILLIES WORLD SERIES AND KNEW EXACTLY
WHAT WAS GOING ON, COULD TELL YOU
EVERY PLAYER'S NAME AND, YOU KNOW,
IT WAS A BIG DEAL TO HIM.
HE LOVED IT. ABOUT 9 YEARS OLD,
GOT HOOKED. LOVED CATCHING
AND LOVED PUTTING
THE BAT ON THE BALL. MY DAD,
A BIG PART OF THAT, YOU KNOW, HELPING ME
DEVELOP MY SKILL SETS
AT AN EARLY AGE. I USED TO GO
OUT IN THE BACK YARD, SHOW HIM
HOW TO BLOCK BALLS, SHOW HIM HOW, YOU KNOW,
THE QUICKER TO RELEASE
DOWN TO SECOND MAKES YOU LOOK
100 TIMES FASTER THAN
WHAT YOU REALLY ARE. HIS FATHER,
HE WOULD JUST ENCOURAGE,
ENCOURAGE, ENCOURAGE. "THAT'S WHAT
I'M TALKING ABOUT. NOW, THAT'S
WHAT I WANTED YOU TO DO.
THAT'S PERFECT." I ALWAYS USED
TO SAY TO HIM, "I'M NOT GOING
TO PRACTICE IT
TILL YOU DIE, "BUT I GUARANTEE YOU, "IF YOU GIVE ME
60 MINUTES OF
YOUR UNDIVIDED ATTENTION, I WILL GUARANTEE YOU,
FROM MY HEART,
GOOD RESULTS." I WAS ONE OF THE BEST
LITTLE LEAGUE BASEBALL
PLAYERS IN THE AREAS. STARTED TO SET RECORDS,
LITTLE LEAGUE RECORDS, HITTING THE MOST
HOME RUNS IN A SEASON. MY EARLIEST
MEMORY OF EDDIE WAS
DEFINITELY BASEBALL AND BEING THE HERO TO ANYONE AND EVERYONE
THAT KNEW HIM. YOU COULD PICK
THE NEWSPAPER UP AND, AT LEAST ONCE, TWICE,
3 TIMES A WEEK,
SEE HIS NAME IN THERE. I MEAN,
THE WHOLE TOWN KNEW HIM. YOU FEEL LIKE
THE COOLEST KID
IN THE WORLD. PEOPLE THOUGHT THE FAMILY
WAS THE ALL-AMERICAN,
PERFECT FAMILY. NOT ONLY WERE ALL 3 OF US
TREMENDOUS ATHLETES, WE WERE
FANTASTIC STUDENTS. EVERYBODY SAW US
AS THE BRADY BUNCH, AND WE ARE THE FARTHEST
THING FROM IT. I ALWAYS DEMANDED... EXCELLENCE, AND I ALWAYS DEMANDED
100% EFFORT. IT WAS KIND OF LIKE
A DUTY TO BE THE BEST. THAT STRESS AND PRESSURE
REALLY STARTED TO,
I GUESS, TAKE A TOLL ON ME, YOU KNOW,
EVEN AT AN EARLY AGE. THEY NEVER
REALLY DID
ACCEPT FAILURE. FEAR OF
NOT PERFORMING WELL AND HAVING TO HEAR
HORRIBLE THINGS
FROM HIM, THAT I STINK, THAT I SUCK,
THAT I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH. YELL, SCREAM, HOPE YOU INTIMIDATE
THEM ENOUGH TO PERFORM
A LITTLE BETTER. IT HURT. EVERYTHING THAT
HE SAID TO ME CUT RIGHT TO MY CORE,
RIGHT TO THE BONE. AND I WANTED TO DO WELL
A LOT OF TIMES 'CAUSE I DIDN'T WANT
TO FEEL THAT. I DIDN'T WANT
TO FEEL THOSE EMOTIONS. OF COURSE,
THERE WERE TIMES
I WAS PRETTY HARSH. I'M NOT GOING
TO LIE TO YOU.
YEAH, I WAS. HE'S THE ONLY GUY
IN MY WHOLE LIFE THAT I'VE EVER
BEEN TERRIFIED OF
WHEN HE GETS ANGRY. I WOULD JUST SAY,
YOU KNOW WHAT? HARD WORK WILL PAY OFF. IT WAS HIS TURN
TO GO UP FOR BAT, AND WE WERE ALL
HOLDING HANDS LIKE--
[INHALES] AND, UH, HE HIT THAT BALL,
AND IT CLEARED THAT FENCE, AND ALL THE COACHES
TURNED AND LOOKED, AND THEY WENT, "SON,
WHAT ARE YOUR GRADES LIKE?" AND WE WERE LIKE, OOH! WE WERE SO EXCITED.
IT WAS AWESOME. I WAS REALLY HAPPY
'CAUSE I THOUGHT
THE SKY WAS THE LIMIT FOR BASEBALL
AND MY ACADEMIC FUTURE. HE WENT TO DUKE,
AND HE DIDN'T
LET US DOWN. STARTED IMMEDIATELY
AS A FRESHMAN, AND HAD A TREMENDOUS
BATTING AVERAGE. WAS HITTING
HOME RUNS, AND STARTED BREAKING
COLLEGIATE RECORDS
AS A FRESHMAN. HE MADE FIRST TEAM
ALL-ACC. HE MADE FIRST TEAM
ALL-AMERICAN. WAS PROJECTED TO GO
FOR A SECOND ROUND IN THE MAJOR LEAGUE DRAFT
AT THE END OF HIS JUNIOR YEAR. WE ALL WANTED TO SAY,
YOU KNOW, "THAT GUY WHO HIT
THAT 500-FOOT HOME RUN,
THAT'S MY BROTHER." WE DROVE TO GEORGIA,
TO SOUTH CAROLINA, MARYLAND, VIRGINIA,
VIRGINIA TECH. WE DROVE EVERYWHERE
TO WATCH HIM
PLAY BASEBALL. AND I ALWAYS USED
TO SAY TO HIM, "EDDIE, YOU ARE
THE BEST DAMN
LEFT-HANDED HITTER I EVER SEEN
PLAY THE GAME." THERE'S SO MUCH PRESSURE
IN CONSTANTLY HOLDING UP
THE IMAGE OF BEING THE PERFECT KID, YOU KNOW,
THE ALL-AMERICAN
BASEBALL SUPERSTAR, THAT I WANTED TO GO OUT
AND DRINK AND HANG OUT
WITH MY FRIENDS. BEING OUT ON MY OWN
AND WITH NO MOM AND DAD
UP MY BUTT TELLING ME
WHAT TO DO ANYMORE, IT SEEMED LIKE
A FANTASYLAND. I FELT GREAT.
I FELT HAPPY. I FOUND OUT
I'M A PRETTY FUN GUY,
YOU KNOW, WHEN I DRINK. AND HE WAS SMOKING POT
CONSTANTLY, YOU KNOW--BEFORE GAMES,
AFTER GAMES, COUPLED WITH
THE EXCESSIVE DRINKING. I THINK DEEP DOWN,
HE FELT THAT OK, YEAH, THE COACH IS GOING
TO THREATEN ME, BUT THERE'S NO WAY--
THERE'S NO WAY
WHATSOEVER-- THAT THIS COACH IS GOING
TO GET RID OF ME. IT WAS THE HARDEST--
PROBABLY THE HARDEST THING THAT I'D HAD
TO EXPERIENCE AT
THAT POINT IN MY LIFE. IT WAS ABOUT 2 A.M. WHEN
WE GOT THE PHONE CALL.
I'LL NEVER FORGET. ALL I COULD HEAR ED SAY IS, "ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME?" MY HUSBAND,
HIS HEART WAS BROKEN. BROKEN. AND HE HUNG UP THE PHONE,
AND MY HUSBAND CRIED. AFTER THAT,
THERE WEREN'T ANY MORE
TRIPS TO DUKE. AT ALL. MY PARENTS STOPPED
REALLY RELATING TO ME. THEY DIDN'T CALL ME
AS MUCH. MY SENIOR YEAR,
THEY DIDN'T COME DOWN TO SEE ME ONE TIME
ALL SCHOOL YEAR.
NOT ONCE. HE FEELS THAT
HIS PARENTS
ABANDONED HIM BECAUSE
HE LOST SOMETHING THAT WAS HIS LIFE
AND THAT HE LOVED, BUT HE ALSO LOST
SOMETHING THAT, IN TURN, WAS THEIR LIFE
AND THAT THEY LOVED. IS THERE A PART OF ME
THAT QUIT? I AIN'T NEVER BEEN
A QUITTER. YEAH. YOU KNOW,
I STARTED DRINKING MORE
THAN I SHOULD HAVE BECAUSE I WAS UPSET, BUT IT NEVER AFFECTED
MY ABILITY TO BE
SUCCESSFUL. WE ENJOYED SPENDING,
YOU KNOW, A LOT OF TIME
IN THE RESTAURANT
TOGETHER. AND WE WERE SUCCESSFUL
AT IT. AS FAR AS
THE RESTAURANT
WAS CONCERNED, THEY SERVED GREAT FOOD.
THEY HAD GREAT SERVICE. WE GOT REVIEWED
BY CRITICS, ALL LETTING US KNOW
THAT WE WERE DOING
AN AMAZING JOB. WE ALL THOUGHT, "OK."
THE CRAZINESS, ALL THAT,
WE THOUGHT IT WAS OVER. HE WAS--
FINALLY FOUND HIS NICHE.
HE HAD IT. THANK GOD HE FINALLY HAS
SOMETHING HE CAN FEEL
PROUD OF AGAIN. HE FOUND A WAY
TO LIVE LIFE
WITHOUT BASEBALL, WE THOUGHT. AND IT WAS ALL FAKE. GUESS I WAS THERE TWICE,
AND BOTH TIMES, EDDIE WAS VERY DRUNK
THE ENTIRE TIME
WE WERE THERE. THINGS GOT TOUGH.
I STARTED EXPERIMENTING
WITH COCAINE, STARTED SMOKING POT, AND STARTED DRINKING MORE. HE REALLY STARTED
TO FALL APART AGAIN. ALL OVER AGAIN. [INDISTINCT]
PERSONAL BANKRUPTCY, LOST THE HOUSE,
LOST THE BUSINESS. THEN, THE MARRIAGE SPIRALED
OUT OF CONTROL FROM THERE, AND THEN,
SHE HAD HIM ARRESTED
FOR HARASSMENT AND BREAKING AND ENTERING
AND EVERYTHING AND
THE RESTRAINING ORDER. TO LIVE OUT OF A GYM BAG
AT 32 YEARS OLD... NOT RIGHT. SINCE BASEBALL HAS BEEN
TAKEN FROM HIS LIFE, HE HAS BEEN
JUST WANDERING DOWN
A PATH OF DESTRUCTION, COMPLETELY LOST. HOW MANY TIMES
HAS HE HAD DUIs? I THINK BOTH LUCK
AND STATISTICS ARE AGAINST HIM,
AT THIS POINT. AS TO WHETHER OR NOT
HE'LL GET ANOTHER ONE BEFORE KILLING SOMEBODY OR KILLING HIMSELF. [BIRD CHIRPS] [BEEPING] [TYPING] AH, YES. I WAS CALLING
IN REFERENCE TO THE, UH, THE TRAVEL TRYOUTS
THIS THURSDAY. BASEBALL,
IT'S BEEN IN MY LIFE,
YOU KNOW, FOREVER. IT'S PROBABLY
THE LAST THING THAT I CAN REMEMBER
DOING FOR MYSELF
WHERE I TRULY WAS HAPPY. I KNOW JEFF
FROM BACK IN THE DAY,
BUT YEAH. IF HE WAS LOOKING
FOR PLAYERS FOR
AN OVER-30 LEAGUE, I'M DEFINITELY
INTERESTED. EDDIE LIVES IN THE PAST.
I MEAN, HE WILL TELL YOU ANY DAY OF THE WEEK,
MORNING, NOON,
AND NIGHT, THAT HE CAN STILL
A BASEBALL 550 FEET. AND I TOLD HIM
TIME AND TIME AGAIN, WHO THE HELL CARES? HE'S 32,
AND HE'S GOT NO JOB,
NO CAR, NO CAREER. [INDISTINCT
CHATTER] AFTER I HAVE
A FEW DRINKS, I CAN ENJOY MYSELF
AND HAVE FUN. ♪ TAKE ME OUT
TO THE BALLGAME ♪ [MAN CHEERS] ♪ TAKE ME OUT
TO THE CROWD ♪ HIS INABILITY TO SEE
THAT THE HAPPINESS
THAT HE'S EXPERIENCED WHEN HE'S DRINKING
AND OUT AT THE BARS
IS SO TEMPORARY. HE CAN'T FIND HAPPINESS
IN THE FUTURE UNLESS HE PUTS
THE PAST TO REST,
AND HE QUITS DRINKING. [BAT CRACKS]
[WHISTLING] ♪ 3 STRIKES, YOU'RE OUT
AT THE OLD BALLGAME ♪ [CROWD CHEERING] [INDISTINCT] [DISHES RATTLING]
[WATER RUNNING] EDDIE--HE WAS LOVING,
HE WAS CARING. HE WAS
JUST A GOOD PERSON. YOU KNOW, I CAN'T SAY
THE SAME THING NOW BECAUSE,
AT THIS POINT, HE'S VERY GOOD
AT MANIPULATING AND TELLING LIES
AND BEING VERY,
VERY DECEPTIVE. I LOVE MY BROTHER. BUT I DON'T KNOW
WHO HE IS ANYMORE. [GROANS]
HERE. HE'S BOTH USING
HIS NEWFOUND FRIEND JACKIE FOR FOOD AND LODGING, AND I ALSO BELIEVE
HE'S USING AN EX-GIRLFRIEND AS A MEANS
OF COMPANIONSHIP. WHO KNOWS? MAYBE SEX.
WHATEVER. I DON'T KNOW. HE IS
A DIABOLICAL LIAR. THURSDAY AND FRIDAY,
SUPPOSED TO BE GETTING
TOGETHER LATER IN THE WEEK WITH
SOME FRIENDS AND STUFF, SO WE'LL SEE HOW
THAT ALL PLAYS OUT. I'M ASSUMING
YOU DON'T WANT ME THERE. WHAT'S THAT? NO, NO.
THURSDAY, YES. FRIDAY, I'M PROBABLY
JUST GOING TO, WELL, CATCH UP WITH
SOME OF THE GUYS. GUYS. [CHUCKLES] SO...
SURE. TAKING ADVANTAGE
OF PEOPLE LIKE THAT, I THINK, IS THE EPITOME
OF A SCUMBAG. I DEFINITELY HAVE
SOME RESENTMENT
TOWARDS MY SISTER. SHE WENT AND TOLD
SOME PRETTY HORRIBLE
THINGS ABOUT ME. HE SAID, "COME HERE.
I WANT TO TALK TO YOU." AND HE GRABBED ME
LIKE A CRAZY MAN. IT WAS HORRIFYING. I WAS AFRAID I'D NEVER GET
OUT OF THAT BATHROOM. THAT WAS THE MOMENT
THAT I REALIZED I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT
HE'S CAPABLE OF ANYMORE. Eddie: UH-OH.
Jackie: WHAT? MY PARENTS ARE HERE. THAT'S NOT
YOUR PARENTS, IS IT? YES, IT IS. SINCE THE DAY
THAT EDDIE GOT CUT
FROM THE BASEBALL TEAM, MY DAD AND HIM HAVE HAD
A RELATIONSHIP THAT, WHEN YOU COMPARE IT
TO THE RELATIONSHIP
THEY HAD PRIOR TO THAT, YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE
IT'S THE SAME 2 PEOPLE. HI, JACKIE.
HOW ARE YOU? [INDISTINCT CHATTER] WHAT HE'S DOING AND
THE TRACK HE'S TAKING
IN HIS LIFE RIGHT NOW HAS... NO REAL GOOD OUTCOME. WHAT'S GOING ON
TOMORROW? JOBS ARE GOOD, FOR THE MOST PART. MY DAD FEELS EMBARRASSED
THAT HIS PRIDE AND JOY
DIDN'T SUCCEED. AM I GILDING A--
EXPECTING
TOO MUCH OF HIM? I CAN TAKE IT
TO MY GRAVE,
I'LL TELL YOU NOW. I NEVER EXPECTED
ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT HE WAS
NATURALLY BORN WITH. MY DAD, I KNOW
THAT HE PLAYED BASEBALL
GROWING UP. I KNOW THAT
HE WAS PRETTY GOOD
HIMSELF. I'M NOT GOING TO LIE.
I WAS A VERY GOOD BASEBALL
PLAYER IN HIGH SCHOOL. MY DAD ALWAYS INSTILLED
IN ME-- AND EVEN THE NIGHT HE DIED,
HE SAID TO ME, "TAKE GOOD CARE
OF YOUR MOTHER, AND NEVER BRING SHAME
TO YOUR NAME." HE STAYED BACK
BECAUSE OF, UM, MY AUNT, HIS MOTHER,
NOT HAVING ANYBODY HOME. BUT I THINK
HE OFTEN WONDERS WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED
IF HE DID DO IT. AND THAT'S WHY
THERE WAS A SENSE OF... UH, VICARIOUSLY LIVING
THROUGH EDDIE. Ed: WE WERE A TEAM. Lisa: WHEN EDDIE
LOST BASEBALL, IT SHOULD BE EDDIE
THAT'S DEVASTATED... NOT MY DAD. AND MY DAD CAN'T
GET OVER IT. ANSWER ME THIS. WHY WOULD YOU GO BACK
TO THE SAME DEMONS THAT GOT YOU IN TROUBLE?
ANSWER ME THAT. Denise: THIS IS WHAT
WE DON'T UNDERSTAND. ANSWER ME THAT.
JUST ANSWER ME, WHY DO YOU GO BACK
TO THE BARS? BECAUSE IT HAS--
'CAUSE IT'S-- IT'S NOT RIGHT, ED.
YOU'RE NOT 18-- DRINKING'S
NOT ILLEGAL! [STAMMERS] I DON'T CARE
ABOUT DRINKING LEGAL. DRINKING
AND DRIVING IS. DRINKING HABITUALLY
AND DRINKING TO GET
YOURSELF IN TROUBLE-- I NEVER INTEND
TO GET IN TROUBLE. NO ONE EVER INTENDS
TO GET BEHIND A WHEEL DRUNK
AND GET CAUGHT. HOW MANY CARS
YOU WRECKED? GOD FORBID
YOU EVER HURT
SOMEBODY. THIS IS AN AMBUSH.
I MEAN, THIS IS
RIDICULOUS. I FINALLY DID
GOOD THINGS. I CAME TO GET CREDIT
FOR IT. BUT NOW,
WE GOT TO RELIVE ALL THE THINGS
THAT I HAVE DONE
TO [BLEEP] UP. ARE YOU EVER GOING
TO FORGIVE ME? EVER? LOOK, THEY WERE JUST--
THIS IS BULL [BLEEP]. I CAN'T BELIEVE--
AND I'M A LITTLE UPSET THAT YOU DIDN'T
LET ME KNOW THAT THEY
WERE GOING TO BE HERE. I DIDN'T THINK THAT
THERE WOULD BE A PROBLEM
WITH THEM BEING HERE. WELL,
THERE IS A PROBLEM.
BIG PROBLEM. HE--HE JUST
DOESN'T GET IT. THIS IS
AN INTERROGATION. [INDISTINCT CHATTER
AND LAUGHTER] I KNOW EDDIE LEARNED
ALL OF THIS. AND THAT'S
WHAT'S UPSETTING-- HE LEARNED
GOOD BEHAVIOR. HE KNOWS
RIGHT FROM WRONG. HE'S JUST CHOOSING
TO BEHAVE BADLY. I DON'T KNOW
WHY HE'S DOING THIS
TO HIMSELF. EDDIE HAS ROBBED
ALL THE ATTENTION. SORRY,
BUT IT'S TOUCHED A NERVE. LIKE, EDDIE HAS ROBBED
ALL THE ATTENTION
MY ENTIRE LIFE. AS A CHILD,
IT WAS ALL EXTREMELY GOOD,
POSITIVE ATTENTION, AND NOW,
IT'S JUST ALL NEGATIVE,
HORRIBLE ATTENTION. IT'S HEARTBREAKING
TO WATCH, AND IT'S HEARTBREAKING
TO LIVE WITH IT, AND TO SEE WHAT
HE'S DOING TO HIMSELF. MY WEDDING,
THE HAPPIEST TIME
OF MY LIFE, WAS OVERSHADOWED
BECAUSE OF EDDIE-- HIS DRINKING AT THE WEDDING,
HIS BEHAVIOR AT THE WEDDING. AND MY MOM MADE IT
SO THAT SHE COULDN'T
HAVE A GOOD TIME BECAUSE SHE WAS
SO WORRIED ABOUT WHAT WAS GOING ON
WITH EDDIE THAT DAY. THIS TORE US APART.
HOW MANY ARGUMENTS
HAVE WE HAD WITH ME TRYING
TO RATIONALIZE
WHAT HE'S DOING AND YOU BEING--
IT'S WRONG. ME TRYING TO GIVE HIM
THAT LITTLE BIT MORE
OF A CHANCE? WE ANNOUNCED
TO THE FAMILY
WE'RE HAVING A CHILD, AND IT WAS LIKE,
"HEY, GREAT.
CONGRATULATIONS. BACK ABOUT EDDIE BRIAN NEEDS
TO TELL HIS PARENTS HE DOESN'T NEED
TO BE CONSUMED WITH
ALL OF THIS DRAMA THAT IS GOING ON WHEN IT'S NOT
HIS RESPONSIBILITY. MAYBE IF I EVER HAD
THE COURAGE TO SAY, "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
ENOUGH ABOUT EDDIE
ALREADY. WE DON'T WANT
TO HEAR ANYTHING MORE
ABOUT EDDIE." IF YOU GUYS WERE IN
A PITCH BLACK ROOM HERE DOING A BUNCH
OF NASTY STUFF, AND THEN, I COME IN
AND TURN THE LIGHT ON-- [GASPS]
THERE YOU ARE. THE LIGHT IS NOT
THE PROBLEM. YEAH.
[CHUCKLES] MMM. BUT WHAT
YOU'RE GOING TO DO IS YOU'RE GOING TO TRY
TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE THE LIGHT'S THE PROBLEM,
OR I'M THE PROBLEM, AND IF I BUY THAT,
I'LL TURN THE LIGHT OFF, AND THEN YOU'LL GO
BACK TO DOING
WHAT YOU'RE DOING. THE PROBLEM IS ALWAYS
THE PROBLEM. MM-HMM.
ABSOLUTELY. ALL RIGHT.
HE'S THE DEPENDENT. HIS DRUG OF CHOICE
IS ALCOHOL. CALL YOU CO-DEPENDENT
BECAUSE YOU START
BECOMING DEPENDENT ON THE DEPENDENT
FOR YOUR HIGH. YOU COULD BECOME AS
PREOCCUPIED WITH EDDIE AS EDDIE IS
WITH DRINKING. THERE'S PROBABLY NOT
A CONVERSATION THAT DOES NOT EXIST
BETWEEN OUR PARENTS THAT EDDIE
ISN'T BROUGHT UP. AND THAT'S NOT
JUST DAY TO DAY. THAT'S EVERY TIME
WE SPEAK TO OUR PARENTS. OH, GOD. MY SUGGESTION IS THAT
WHEN HE GOES
TO TREATMENT, YOU GO TO THE BETTY FORD
FAMILY PROGRAM, BECAUSE
YOU NEED SOME HELP, AND THAT'S WHAT FAMILY
TREATMENT'S ABOUT. EVERYBODY'S IN CHARGE
OF THEIR OWN RECOVERY, AND THEY NEED TO BE
WHETHER THE OTHER PERSON
RECOVERS OR NOT. I WANT TO, BECAUSE
I DON'T WANT TO FEEL
LIKE THIS ANYMORE, AND IT'S NOT FAIR
TO BRIAN AND LISA. AND THEY WANT
THEIR MOM AND DAD
BACK, TOO. YEAH. OK. COOL.
SO YOU'RE GOING? I'M GOING.
YOU GOING? OK.
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
SO HERE'S A NEW RULE. WE'RE NOT HERE
TO FIND HIM GUILTY
OR A TRIAL. WE'RE NOT HERE
TO MAKE HIM FEEL BAD. IF FEELING BAD
SOLVED ANYTHING, THIS WOULD BE SOLVED,
'CAUSE HE FEELS BAD. . SO WE'RE GOING TO TRY
SOMETHING ELSE. AND THEN, TOMORROW, DAD, I WANT YOU TO TELL HIM
WHY YOU PERSONALLY ARE HERE. NOW, TOMORROW, THE MOMENT
HE WALKS IN THE DOOR
AND SEES EVERYBODY, HE MIGHT DIG
HIS HEELS IN AND FIGHT. MM-HMM. HE GETS TO SAY "NO," BUT HE DOESN'T GET
TO SAY "NO" WITHOUT
LIFE CHANGING. Ed: MM-HMM. HE DOESN'T GET
TO DO THIS ANYMORE. IF HE WANTS TO DO THIS,
HE GETS TO GO
SOMEPLACE ELSE AND DO IT NOT TO US. RIGHT. [SNIFFLING] SO ONCE AGAIN,
IF HE ASKS HEY, WHAT'S THIS ABOUT?
WHAT'S GOING ON? JUST-- YOU KNOW,
WE'VE BEEN CONCERNED... FOR A LONG TIME,
AND WE'VE ALL TRIED
TO HELP YOU, AND... IT DIDN'T DO ANY GOOD.
DIDN'T DO ANY GOOD. SO WE BROUGHT
MR. VANVONDEREN TO HELP. OK. GUYS STILL GOING
TO BETTY FORD? WELL,
NOT RIGHT AWAY. I'M JUST CONCERNED
ABOUT MOM STARTING
A NEW JOB, OK? LET ME ASK YOU
A QUESTION. WHAT HAPPENS
IF YOUR FOLKS CAVE? I HAVE BOTTOM LINES
FOR THEM. WHAT'S THAT? I CAN NO LONGER DO THIS
TO MYSELF AND MY FAMILY. AND IF THIS CONTINUES, I'M GOING TO HAVE
TO CUT TIES. MM-HMM. 'CAUSE I CAN'T DO THIS
ANYMORE. WE'LL BE THERE.
OK. YOU HAVE MY WORD.
OK. SOONER THAN LATER,
MY SUGGESTION. THAT'S ACTUALLY... REALLY. EDDIE. HEY.
HI, EDDIE. WHAT'S GOING ON? WE JUST KIND OF WANT YOU
TO SIT DOWN AND LISTEN
TO WHAT WE HAVE TO SAY. OK. I DIDN'T EXPECT
TO SEE YOU. HI. WHAT'S GOING ON? YOU'RE GOING TO SIT
OVER HERE. SIT NEXT TO MOMMY.
NEXT TO MOMMY. RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE. AND I'M GOING
TO SIT NEXT TO YOU. OK.
I'M JEFF. VERY NICE TO MEET YOU. NICE TO MEET
YOU, TOO. AHH. WELL, UM, SO I'VE ACTUALLY
BEEN HERE
SINCE YESTERDAY. OK. AND I SEE
A BUNCH OF PEOPLE THAT
LOVE YOU LIKE CRAZY, BUT THEY FEEL LIKE
THEY'RE LOSING YOU, AND THEY WANT TO FIGHT
TO GET YOU BACK. SO TODAY IS INVITING YOU
TO JOIN THE FIGHT, AND THEY'RE GOING TO SAY
WHAT THEY HAVE TO SAY, AND YOU'RE GOING TO SAY
WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY,
AND THEN WE'RE DONE. OK.
ALL RIGHT? AHEM. EDDIE,
I SPENT A HUGE PART
OF MY LIFE IDOLIZING EVERYTHING
ABOUT YOU, ALWAYS DREAMING
THAT SOMEDAY, I WOULD HAVE
THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE LIKE
MY BIG BROTHER. I CAN REMEMBER
WHAT AN HONOR IT WAS
FOR ME TO BRAG TO MY FRIENDS
ABOUT WHAT A FANTASTIC
BIG BROTHER I HAVE. THE FAMILY TRIPS TO
WATCH YOU PLAY BASEBALL WHEN YOUR BABE RUTH
BASEBALL TEAM WENT
TO THE WORLD SERIES, AS WELL AS THE TRIPS TO
JUST ABOUT EVERY STATE UP AND DOWN
THE EAST COAST WHILE
YOU WERE IN COLLEGE. [SNIFFLES] AT TIMES, YOU CAN BE
SO LOVING, GENUINE,
AND PASSIONATE. HOWEVER,
THINGS HAVE CHANGED. YOUR DUIs DISPLAY TO ME
THAT YOU HOLD LITTLE
VALUE FOR YOUR LIFE, AS WELL AS
THE LIVES OF OTHERS. EACH TIME I READ ABOUT
YOU IN THE POLICE LOG... [SNIFFLING] I TRY TO CONCEAL
MY SADNESS WITH RECALLING THE POSITIVE
HEADLINES FROM
YOUR BASEBALL DAYS. EDDIE, I URGE YOU TO
ACCEPT THIS GIFT TODAY, AND TO YOU,
I POSE ONE QUESTION. WILL YOU
ACCEPT TREATMENT
AND GET HELP TODAY? [SNIFFLING] I WANT YOU TO HEAR
FROM SOMEBODY WHO HAS PRETTY MUCH
DISAPPEARED FROM
YOUR LIFE. WILL YOU LISTEN
TO YOUR SISTER? YEAH. EDDIE, I'M HERE
BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, AND I REFUSE TO WITNESS
THE CONTINUAL DESTRUCTION
OF YOUR LIFE AND SOUL DUE TO YOUR ADDICTION. [SNIFFLES] EDDIE, GROWING UP,
I REMEMBER HOW
INCREDIBLE IT WAS TO SIMPLY BE
IN YOUR PRESENCE. YOU NEVER HAD TO BE
ANYWHERE SPECIFIC,
OR DO ANYTHING GRAND, BECAUSE AS SIMPLE AS
YOU TEACHING ME HOW TO SHOOT A BASKETBALL
IN THE DRIVEWAY OR TEACHING ME
HOW TO PLAY NINTENDO ARE MY FAVORITE MEMORIES
EARLY ON, BECAUSE ALL I WANTED... WAS TO BE AROUND
MY BIG BROTHER. THINGS ARE DIFFERENT NOW,
EDDIE. I'VE GONE FROM
ALWAYS WANTING TO BE
IN YOUR PRESENCE TO BEING FEARFUL
OF BEING ALONE IN
A ROOM WITH YOU. [SNIFFLES] IT SEEMS YOU LACK
ANY RECOGNITION AS TO HOW YOUR ACTIONS
IMPACT YOUR FAMILY
AND EVEN YOURSELF. I OFTEN WONDER
IF THERE IS
A BOTTOM FOR YOU OTHER THAN
KILLING YOURSELF. WILL YOU PLEASE... ACCEPT THE HELP
THAT'S BEING OFFERED
TO YOU TODAY? [EXHALES] [SNIFFLES] DO YOU WANT
TO KNOW THE PLAN? UH, I NEED A MINUTE. [SNIFFLES AND EXHALES] COME HERE.
COME HERE. [SNIFFLING] I NEED--
I NEED A MINUTE. YEAH, GIVE HIM--
GIVE HIM A MINUTE. COME ON. GIVE HIM A MINUTE.
ALL RIGHT. [EXHALES] IT'S A LOT
TO LISTEN TO. YEAH. I DON'T KNOW.
I CAN'T LEAVE THE STATE. ALL RIGHT.
WE'LL TALK
ABOUT THAT. I HAVE A COURT DATE
I CAN'T MISS. WE FIXED THAT. WE MADE ARRANGEMENTS
WITH THE DISTRICT
ATTORNEY, AND WHAT'S GOING ON
WITH YOUR COURT DATE
COULD BE NULL AND VOID IF YOU SAID "YES" TODAY. YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH. LISTEN TO ME.
CAN I TELL YOU ONE THINGS? [SNIFFLES]
OK. LIKE I ONCE TOLD YOU, THAT WATER THAT GOES
OVER THE DAM AT
SILVERLAKE IS GONE. OK? NEVER COMES BACK.
ALL RIGHT? YOU HEAR ME?
YEAH. THIS TIME,
IT'S NOT THE LOVE
OF THE GAME, EDDIE. IT'S BECAUSE
I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU WITH
ALL OF MY HEART. I WANT YOU BACK. PLEASE. I'M ASKING YOU
TO ACCEPT THIS HELP TODAY. START ANEW. [SNIFFLES AND SOBS] YEAH. LET'S GO.
ALL RIGHT. Denise: COME HERE. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. THANKS FOR COMING. I'M SORRY.
I'M REALLY SORRY,
LISA. WHEN YOU GET DONE
WITH TREATMENT, I'LL COME SEE YOU, OK?
[SNIFFLES] NEXT TIME I SEE YOU,
NO WORRIES. OK. I'LL MISS YOU. THANK YOU FOR DOING THIS
FOR ME, BRIAN. YOU'RE WELCOME.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. SAVING MY--
SAVING MY LIFE. YOU GOING TO DO THIS? YEAH.
I'M PROUD. REMEMBER THAT.
REMEMBER THAT, OK? REMEMBER.
REMEMBER, I'M PROUD. AND I'LL ALWAYS BE PROUD. NOW, GO GET THEM. OK.
I WILL. LET'S GO. HE'S OFF TO
A NEW FUTURE. [CRYING] EDDIE, WELCOME TO
THE RIGHT PLACE. [INDISTINCT] GLAD TO MEET YOU.
GLAD YOU CAME DOWN. THANK YOU. EDDIE REALLY DOES KNOW
WHAT HE IS. HE'S HAD
A LOT OF EXPERIENCES
THAT HAVE DEFINED HIM, SUCH AS BEING
A BASEBALL PLAYER. WITH EDDIE,
WE'RE GOING TO BE WORKING ON MAKING HIM FEEL
LIKE HE IS IMPORTANT
FOR REAL AS OPPOSED
TO BEING IMPORTANT BECAUSE OF THE THINGS
THAT HE PORTRAYS. PLEASE, COME ON IN.
HAVE A SEAT. MAYBE I SHOULD LOOK BACK
AND SAY I PRESENTED
A LOT OF GRIEF THE LAST FEW YEARS
IN HIS LIFE, CONSTANT REMINDERS
OF WHAT YOU SHOULD
HAVE DONE OR WHAT YOU SHOULD BE. I JUST WANT HIM TO DO
WHAT HE LOVES TO DO... 'CAUSE I WOULD BE
PROUD OF HIM NO MATTER
WHAT HE DOES, AND I WANT TO EXPRESS
THAT TO HIM SOON. I AM EXTREMELY EXCITED AND EXTREMELY NERVOUS
AT THE SAME TIME. MY PALMS ARE SWEATING,
AND EVERYTHING JUST-- I CAN'T IMAGINE
WHAT I'M GOING TO SEE. HEY. HEY. OH, MY GOD.
[INDISTINCT] WHAT'S GOING ON?
THIS IS FANTASTIC. HOW YOU DOING?
GOOD. HOW ARE YOU? I'M DOING
REALLY GOOD. I'VE BEEN SOBER
FOR 55 DAYS, AND I FEEL
FANTASTIC. PHYSICALLY, I FEEL
VERY HEALTHY. EMOTIONALLY,
I FEEL LIKE I HAVE A MUCH MORE CLEAR WAY
OF LOOKING AT THINGS. HE JUST LOOKS HEALTHY, AND HIS EYES ARE OPEN, AND HE LOOKS LIKE
A COMPLETELY
DIFFERENT PERSON. HI, LISA. HI.
I'M CRAIG GIVENS. NICE TO MEET YOU.
NICE TO MEET YOU. PART OF ED'S RECOVERY IS
RECOGNIZING THAT HE'S MORE THAN THE SUM
OF HIS ACCOMPLISHMENTS, REALIZING JUST BECAUSE
YOUR BASEBALL CAREER HAS ENDED
AS YOU KNEW IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT
YOUR LIFE IS OVER. I WANTED TO KNOW WHAT
WAS THE HARDEST THING THAT YOU'VE REALIZED
AS YOU'VE BEEN HERE. I NEVER--I NEVER... KNEW HOW TO LOSE. AND THE LAST 5 YEARS,
I'VE DONE NOTHING
BUT LOSE. A WIFE, HOUSE,
BUSINESS, CARS... BUT MOST OF ALL,
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. IT'S THE HARDEST THING
IS TO KNOW THAT BY NOT--BY NOT
UNDERSTANDING
HOW TO LOSE, OR JUST ACCEPT IT,
OR ACCEPTING FAILURE, I END UP LOSING MORE. I LEARNED
HOW TO APPRECIATE LIFE AND HOW TO BE GRATEFUL
FOR THE THINGS
I STILL DO HAVE-- A LOVING FAMILY. I JUST WANT HIM
TO BE HAPPY WITH WHO HE IS,
AND, UM, BUILD A RELATIONSHIP
THAT'S JUST ONE-ON-ONE, BROTHER AND SISTER,
AND GO FROM THERE. WHEN I FOUND OUT
MY PARENTS WENT,
I WAS SHOCKED. AND IT MEANT A LOT TO ME. AND THE CONVERSATIONS
I'VE HAD WITH MY DAD
SINCE THEN HAVE BEEN GREAT,
YOU KNOW. HE ACTUALLY ASKED ME
ABOUT MY DAY INSTEAD OF INTERROGATING ME.
IT'S KIND OF NICE. AND IT MADE ME FEEL GOOD
ABOUT MYSELF THAT BY CHOOSING
TO COME DOWN HERE
AND DO THIS, IT'S AFFECTED
MY WHOLE, ENTIRE FAMILY
IN A REAL POSITIVE WAY. <i>♪♪</i> <i>( computer beeps )</i> Hey, Eddie. So good to see you. Well, I'm excited to be here. You look like
a different human being. Funny thing is I actually feel
like a different human being. You looked pretty overwhelmed when you walked in the room
that first day. It was a lot to take in.
I figured I'd try something new. Well, tell me, what are you
doing for work these days? I work as a project manager, but I also work
as the assistant baseball coach <i>at community college.
It's one of the things</i> <i>I get to look forward to now.
I get to be a coach.</i> When you were playing,
it was pretty obvious <i>that your dad was
your biggest fan, so tell me</i> about your relationship
with him right now. How's that? He's supportive of me coaching. <i>He absolutely loves
the fact that I'm happy.</i> I have a great relationship with each and every person
in my family. There are still struggles, but they're
much more manageable. It was great to talk to you. <i>I'm so happy to hear
how your life is going.</i> I'm honored to have
been a part of it. I can't thank everyone enough. I appreciate everything
you've done for me. - Sure good to see you.
-<i> It's good to see you, Jeff.</i> <i>Bye.</i>
