5 Signs You're Dealing With A Narcissist

there are people in this world looking to take advantage of others whether they are classified as a narcissistic sociopathic compulsive or pathological liars they operate differently from most people that you will encounter which makes them even more dangerous because they don't stand out in an obvious way so in this video you're going to learn how to detect it some of those types and we will be taking Elizabeth Holmes as our primary example she was able to raise nearly 1 billion dollars for her company theranos which promised to run full blood scans off just a few drops of blood from your finger this of course would have been a revolution in the medical industry if it were real behind the scenes Elizabeth and her boyfriend Sonny were hiding the fact that these tests did not and never worked they de frauded investors and over a million people who got those Thera nose tests expecting accurate readings which of course was impossible now unfortunately Elizabeth Holmes is not totally unique the NIH reports that 6.2 percent of the u.s. has narcissistic personality disorder and dr. Paul Ekman says that no more than five percent of people are pathological liars that's still potentially 1 in 20 people that's why in this video we're going to explore how you can detect these dangerous personalities before they take advantage since you're probably going to encounter some of them in your life and I'm not trying to label them exactly but they often exhibit behaviors that are consistent with narcissistic personality disorder so first off a large motivator for these types of personalities is having the world's view them in a way that strokes their ego they are hyper driven to maintain the persona that they have constructed so keep an eye out for people with an intense focus on their image for example Elizabeth Holmes wanted to be the female Steve Jobs so she wore black turtlenecks copied his live demo slow reveal of the product and hired a bunch of ex Apple employees at the beginning of her company now of course lots of people have idols that they emulate but a major tip-off that you're dealing with a dangerous personality is that in an attempt to maintain their persona they will lie about seemingly ridiculous things maybe they tell fantastic stories about their own life that never happened like the fire festival co-founder who insisted that he had purchased an island owned by Pablo Escobar when in fact they were actually kicked off of that island by the real owner for even mentioning Pablo apart name in the promotional materials now in Elizabeth's case one ridiculous lie she told all the time was about her voice listen to the baritone that she affected nearly all the time this is what happens when you work to change things and first they think you're crazy then they fight you and then all of a sudden you change the world and that clip is from the beginning of the interview she is collected and prepared but as employees later reported that baritone would sometimes slip at the end of a long day leaving her speaking in a fairly typical sounding voice for a young woman and you can see the same thing occur briefly in that same interview once the questions get tougher then they fight you and then all of a sudden you change the world San Francisco paper and fortune I talked about it in an interview I did with Forbes that we made a decision to expand our test menu since there's no real victim this type of lie to promote a particular image might seem quirky and forgivable but be very wary of these four they can be signs of a deeper need to control how people see them and which is a textbook narcissistic trait and these people are often very disconnected from the feelings of guilt or shame that would discourage other people from this fraudulent and damaging behavior these types also tend to have a very different relationship with lying in general most people have limits on how flagrantly we're willing to lie we prefer instead to bend the truth and the more egregious our lives become the more visibly uncomfortable we are not so much with the narcissistic type they can tell boldface flagrantly fossilised without skipping a beat listen for instance how Thera knows demoed some of their fake tests they would stage these demos they would prick the visiting VIPs finger they would put the blood in the cartridge slot slot the cartridge into the mini lab you know it's start worrying and then they would say it's gonna take a little while why don't you come and either visit the lab or and so the VIP would leave the room then a thoroughness employee would stop the machine take the blood out and bring it to the lab and and that little blood sample would either get tested at the back by one of their laboratory technicians or on one of the Siemens machines these demos happened repeatedly with extremely smart people including an ex Secretary of State and Silicon Valley investors whose job is to be skeptical but not one of them ever caught Elizabeth very likely because she doesn't exhibit the same nervousness around lying that most other people would so do not assume that a calm demeanor means that someone is telling you the truth especially if they are this narcissistic type if this person is for instance or even deeper on that spectrum into psychopathy studies that involve fMRI scans show that they might not even spend any extra time processing alive because their brains don't need to seem to suppress the truth to even focus attention or control body language all of that occurs naturally to them it's like they're inventing a world in their head with no effort and this is how many people get fooled by compulsive and pathological liars they assume that lying must stress other people out because it stresses them out and it makes no sense that anyone could lie so comfortably so they assume that comfortable demeanor means the liar is telling the truth a much better heuristic for you to detect pathological lies is the 10,000 foot view and this means rather than watching one individual's body language or even listening to their explanations of which there will be many you summarized their claims at a very high level and then you let your intuition tell you if that just makes sense in the case of Elizabeth Holmes this is exactly how the reporter who cracked her case was first inspired to dig into her story and that story that something that struck me as odd which was this notion that a 19 year old college dropout with just two semesters of Chemical Engineering under her belt had dropped out of college and pioneered groundbreaking new science you know that that's something that's possible in the realm of computers and computer software obviously with Mark Zuckerberg Bill Gates have done that but in medical science you need the formal training and you need to do years and decades of research to add value this is an important point it seems that psychopaths sociopaths whatever you call them and I'm not saying that Elizabeth Holmes falls into this particular category but whatever this compulsive lying category is these people have an easier time tricking our brains than they do our gut reactions and it's partially because they have an explanation for everything here's one example my grandfather would go get a fair nose test done and he would have a needle in his arm you know it's like well I thought this was a single drop of blood and there'd be some you know excuse about why they needed to take a venous draw for him but you know for everybody else it's a finger prick and you continue to buy into that another thing you tend to notice about this type is that they often don't give up on the lie when most of us get caught red-handed we slump our shoulders in defeat all that is left to do is feel shame say we're sorry and hopefully be forgiven but this type of person who lies compulsively will continue even when the cat is out of the bag Billy McFarlane of fire festival and for me for instance ran a second scam while he was out on bail he offered his email list for the fire festival tickets to the Grammys to meet & Greets with celebrities like LeBron James of course which he had no access to if they would just send him some money now listen to what Elizabeth Holmes told investors just a month before Theron oh shut its doors after she had been barred from holding a position as an officer of a public company by the SEC in a letter to shareholders that day she basically explained that the company would likely be liquidated by the end of July Wow but the the interesting thing is that she is telling people that she is going to start a new company oh my god that is so deranged that's right even after being convicted of securities fraud and with criminal charges pending Elizabeth's maintained the idea that she would be running a company soon and again this just goes to illustrate that this type has a very different relationship with the truth image takes precedence over external reality and it seems to happen effortlessly finally in the event that you do raise your issues with this of person they're very likely to dismiss you and throw you off in one of two ways typically they will label you a hater and cut you out as Elizabeth Holmes and her boyfriend did when subordinates raised issues he received this email from sunny bhiwani that reckless comment based on absolute ignorance is so insulting to me but had any other person made these statements we would have held them accountable in the strongest way the only reason I have taken so much time away from work to address this personally is because you are mr. Schultz's grandson the only email on this topic I want to see from you going forward is an apology or if you're more powerful they'll Aswany concerns by appealing to some kind of conspiracy against them homes for instance said that no one could see the technology at their nose for this reason the only way that we were gonna get responses to our questions was if we signed NDA's because the Thera knows proprietary technology these trade secrets were so valuable that quest and LabCorp the two dominant players in the lab industry we're trying to find out answers to these questions by any means possible so when you start hearing with us or against us ultimatum or hearing about how secrecy is necessary for reasons that might make for a good plot in a John Grisham novel be on red alert in my experience it is more often the case that someone is trying to con you if you want to learn to be more charismatic and captivating without being a conman narcissist you might want to check out our online course charisma University it is a 30 day program that gives you exactly what you need everyday in about 15 to 20 minutes to maximize your confidence and charisma that comes complete with a daily action guide so you're not guessing what to do every single day now you can read all about the details of in the link below but I figure the strongest way to let you know what it's about is to just let the members speak for themselves so here are just a few of the things that Cu members have written in the first one comes from a guy who got promoted to a senior position early in his career he says I don't even have a Bachelor diploma yet they want me to fill this position and when I asked why this was the answer you have great social skills which is rare for an engineer you think quick on your feet and you are open and self-assured in or demeanor thank you so much for all that you have taught me you've truly changed my life because without Cu I wouldn't have qualified for that position in a million lifetimes now this one comes from another person who just started a new job says I want to let you know that I nailed those first days at work everything that I needed was right there at the right moment the confidence the energy the smile the positive mindset and with all your tips from last Tuesday in mind it could just not go wrong and he finishes by saying I just want to emphasize that what I did the previous day's would even not I would even not have come to mind if I had not discovered that charisma is a skill that can be learned thanks to your YouTube channel and university program and this last one is a comment in the course itself from someone who used it mainly to improve their social and dating life they say life changing in six weeks I went from being socially awkward with few friends to the life of every event I attend I also went from having serious girl problems to dating the girl of my dreams charisma university transformed me from a lonely introvert hoping to better connect with people to an energy filled extrovert who makes new friends everywhere I go I am so happy I joined and of course these are for you SIF 100% real did not ask for these people to write these things but this is what some of the things have been said you can see more in the comments if you decide to join the course if you do that it comes with a 60 day money back guarantee which is 100% for any reason at all and we have that just to make sure that every single member truly feels like they're getting a ton of value from the course otherwise you don't have to stay so if you want to check the course out go ahead click the link on screen now or below in the description if you'd like to check out another video we have those above as well either way I look forward to seeing you in the next video

Channel: Charisma on Command

Views: 4,184,873

Rating: 4.857657 out of 5

Keywords: compulsive liars how to deal, compulsive liars characteristics, can compulsive liars change, how to spot a liar, how to spot a narcissist, how to spot a psychopath, how to spot a sociopath, how to spot a narcissist in 3 minutes, how to spot a narcissist on the first date, how to spot a narcissist in a relationship, how to spot a narcissist woman, psychopath, sociopath vs psychopath, charisma on command, how to detect a liar, Charlie Houpert, CoC, CharismaOnCommand, Charisma

Id: Hg4ws1QPeNE

Length: 12min 34sec (754 seconds)

Published: Mon Feb 25 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/S-Vineyard]

Yes, it has Holmes again on it's cover. But you can't deny that a lot of points also fit with Musk.