How to Read Female Body Language and Decode Women

[Music] welcome back to am Northwest our first guest is an expert at reading body language and says we can learn a lot about people by picking up on their nonverbal cues our focus today is on women and we welcome back the author of the human lie detection of body language 101 Vanessa van Edwards good to see you again Vanessa thanks I just think your segments are always so much fun and and sometimes we think we already know some of this and in fact some of it is it kind of an eight isn't it that we almost naturally do it without even thinking about it some of it is intuitive you know you're like oh that makes total sense some things are a little bit surprising I hope I can surprise you today let's talk about flirting because you say there are certain cues and this is for the male audience out there and actually for the female just in case they want to flirt and don't know how to exactly use one of the first things you say is women need to look up and to the side of the man so this is the come-hither look okay right and we naturally do this when we're trying to entice a male it's when we tilt our head to the side and show the roundness of our face and we kind of look up at a man that's a come-hither look and the reason is because it releases pheromones for men so when we tilt our neck up that's why men love the sort of neck area it's delicious for a man yeah that's why I say here's that here's a great picture of a woman she's tilting her neck up and that's very attractive to man because it also shows the roundness of our face which is why we're in there's the hand hand on the neck indicate anything right so touching our neck or flipping our hair is sort of another flirting move and this is because it releases pheromones it also draws a man's attention to our neck and this is a soft area of our body the estrogen of our neck they love seeing that roundness of our face because men don't have that right right we're just exactly okay so the tossing of the hair is oh yes I did not know that was a flirty wave I just thought that was a habit you know it actually is it becomes a habit because it's a attractive move and so it releases pheromones but it also shows the shine of hair men love and to it from an innate perspective we love the shiny hair because it shows that a woman is very fertile Oh Hellsing okay so you say tossing hair rubbing their neck women raise their eyebrows that lower their lids to entice a man yes so this is a very enticing pose that sort of looks like a woman in pleasure so that's why we do this you'll see Marilyn Monroe one of her favorite masseuses that sounds like a Marilyn Monroe photo and that is why she does it it was literally to cue a man that pleasure part of a man's brain okay you say when it comes to power now when women want power you say women pluck their eyebrows to look helpless and raise a man's Celestra exactly so let's first talk about the things that take away power we didn't tend to like to look submissive because it meant makes a man's testosterone raise so there's a reason why we pluck our eyebrows under here it's a terrible experience I mean every woman knows how awful that is the reason we do that is because it makes us look helpless and then for a man that raises their testosterone to take care of us so that is not really why we pluck our eyebrows so high up and we drop riri redraw our eyebrows high our forehead I had no clue that is why I thought it was just so we didn't look so hairy make it look more more vulnerable yeah that and also women expose their wrists to show their vulnerable you notice men smoke like this women's look like this yes there's a reason for that is because exposing our wrists shows I'm vulnerable I'm submissive which unfortunately in our culture means feminine all right and then the limp wrist kind of thing right but you share doing I know you write this you'll see this with women yeah it's also a show of I'm feminine or I'm submissive so men women are acting like lemon you notice they always go right that's why as it's just a sign of submission you say women can claim territory to show assertiveness so claiming our space spreading our arms out and then also when we're standing to actually claim our space firmly plant our feet a little shoulder-width apart that is a very that's a way to take back power if you want to show that you're powerful and you're feeling confident that's way to do now how do you do that on airplanes because I tell you what getting stuck in the middle seat on an airplane do you men just spread out and like you're stuck like this and I and I'm ready to do this right I'm and then I don't want to because I'm worried about how I was gonna make him feel cuz a man that right that's him claiming his territory you want that elbow room you take it just take it take it because that is actually a sign of the earth controlling your space or claiming your territory yeah that's just a gotcha socializing so use one of the things you say about women we that women don't like to be approached from behind right so I think nobody would like to be approached men don't mind it women whenever you're looking behind their cortisol levels shoot up it's a stress hormone men they don't mind it so if you're a man you're approaching home in a networking event always make sure you try to come in her from the side or lightly tap her her shoulder has a much better way to start off the conversation right otherwise she'll be on edge if you can't protect from behind her that makes a lot of sense also use likeable body language yes so if you're a woman talking to other women or you're a men talking to women likeable body language this is very important for women an expressive face showing your hands and leaving your arms uncrossed that's the way to sort of build rapport with other women if you're trying to just be friendly show that you're likeable that's how you do it show your hands leave your hands loose and smile the body language when you talk about especially women flirting is so powerful I can tell you from experience I've had a roommate who was really not that attractive if you were just to look at her but she did all of those cues that you're talking about the hair tossing the neck thing the looking down that sometimes I see an AK know this the movie cmus Abby's bat and the minimum that that is because for a man female attractiveness has everything to do with cues of openness there's nothing to do with the actual shape of a face so men view women who are more open and willing as more attractive subconsciously when I want to ask you about women's walk because sometimes it seems to me like women can really walk in a way that attracts a man versus another way that doesn't yes so the swishing of the hips men actually cannot do that their their hips are too wide set where they cannot swish their hips like that so when women do that is literally saying look how much estrogen I have it that is literally why we do it same with um swimsuit pictures if you look at Sports Illustrated right the way that women pose is it is a way that men cannot do because their hips are too set straight whereas women have the curved tips so let's say you're at a bar and you want to attract a man across the way I'm doing this for our single producers there's only one okay so you know just her if you're let's say you're out of place and you see a guy you're attracted to what should she do so men miss on average of three courtships courtship signals men so you have to at least three times do either a hair toss you want to look up to the side raise your I am so you have yeah and then you can look away and you have to do it at least three times because on average but look at him do you have a staredown no no I want to look up to the side right and show the roundness of your face perhaps toss your hair back and then look back so it's the side look that really has that come hither look from an evolutionary perspective and then so doing it three times we at least three times leisure time and then wait till he comes over to ask for your number exactly and make it if you're the man make sure you don't approach from the front very good but I say you're so good appreciate that well again the title of the book is human lie detection and body language thank you again always good to see you

Channel: Vanessa Van Edwards

Views: 1,526,133

Rating: 4.7636323 out of 5

Keywords: female body language, women body language, male body language, read a woman's body language, nonverbal tips, women, Female (Gender), body language, reading body language, how to read body language, girls body language, body language attraction, signs of attraction, how to tell if a girl likes you, signs she is interested, how to tell if a woman likes you, flirting, signs that a girl likes you, vanessa van edwards

Id: lV2RTqrJ354

Length: 7min 19sec (439 seconds)

Published: Tue Jan 07 2014