There is definitely a large culture around
discovering bad movies. Ever film buff wants to discover the next
great bad movie. How Sweet It Is from the year 2013 is a very
unique kind of bad movie. (Song) First give me fifty bucks so I can
buy crack. Oooh. I was confused. I was stunned and at points I was horrified even though
this is supposed to be a musical comedy. The movie How Sweet It Is from the year 2013
stars former Saturday Night Live star Joe Piscopo. It also stars Paul Sorvino. This incredibly
talented actor is wasted on this material. (Scene) You looked into my eyes and you lied
to me. You treated me like a [ ] jerk. Like I was
never nothing to you. Paul Sorvino is an award-winning actor best
known for his roles in films like... Goodfellas, The Rocketeer, Dick Tracy, Cruising and many other good parts. There are actors in this movie that have starred
in many other good things. Their collective talent is wasted on a story
that barely makes any sense. "For the first time in a long time I don't
have the urge to drive into oncoming traffic." (wind sounds) Joe Piscopo was most famous in the 80's for
his impression work he would do on Saturday Night Live. He left SNL in 1984, and went on to have a
short movie career starring in films like Dead Heat. (Trailer Voice Over) Detective Bigelow... Is bringing him back alive. We have something on the monitor captain. What is this thing? It's very ugly. Get down! (gunshots) Remember the good days when guns killed people? That's it from now on I'm a vegetarian. (wind sounds) ... Joe Piscopo are "Dead Heat" (Homer Simpson) A maturing Joe Piscopo left
Saturday Night Live to conquer Hollywood. There are so many digs at Joe Piscopo in The
Simpsons, he was actually known in the 80's. (Marge Simpson) A young Joe Piscopo taught
us how to laugh. The Simpsons makes fun of him because he is
a cliche of a person to be the big leading man in Hollywood. (Bart Simpson) I miss Joe Piscopo. In 1997, he married Kimberly O'Driscoll and
sang her a love song on live television for all of us to enjoy. The song is called
Kimberly. (song) Oh I need you! Kimberly! Kimberly! Kimberly! Kimberly! I get it. Her name is Kimberly. How many times are we gonna say her name? (Song) Kimberly! Kimberly! Yes that is Kimberly. Kimberly! Kimberly. (Song) They say it's all wrong. We know it's
all right. They say it's all wrong. You know it's all
right. Cover me! Yeah! Three! Four! What was that? Three! Four! THREE! FOUR! Three! Four! THREE! FOUR! Three! Four! After more than a decade of trying to stay
relevant, Joe Piscopo finally released a comedy special. He had apparently opened a night club in Atlantic
City, New Jersey, called Club Piscopo. (Joe Singing) I'd like to thank you my friends
for being here at the show I'm your humble entertainer, Joe Piscopo He does the impression work he's most famous
for such as David Letterman. He tells stories about his times on SNL and
just name drops a bunch of people. (Joe) Do you know my dear friends I'm proud
to stand before you to tell you I went on to become a friend of the great James Brown. These are some of the incredibly talented
people he mentioned he was friends with Michael Keaton, who he refers to as Mike Keaton Danny Devito, Jay Z, and of course Frank Sinatra, who mentions
about one thousand times in this routine. Frank Sinatra, the chairman of the board. Old blue eyes. Francis Albert Sinatra For Frank Sinatra Frank Sinatra, Frank Sinatra Dear Mr. Sinatra Frank Sinatra, Frank Sinatra. On top of being a talented actor and impressionist, Joe Piscopo is a musician. Throughout the rest of this special he performs
a variety of musical acts Although he couldn't get rights clearances
to any real songs for this special So he just performs public domain songs like
Old McDonald Had a Farm. (Singing) Ee i ee i o All the cats came from miles around. (laughs) From miles around. And then there was one film I did where Treat
Williams and I play cops that die and come back to life called Dead
Heat and unfortunately that's what happened to the film. I was like in Japan and I swear to god I was
out of customs and the guy was going "Dead Heat! Dead Heat!
You die and come back to life!" Wow. That joke didn't land. (Explosion sound) You also get to hear Joe Piscopo rap. (Joe rapping) I'm rapping facts Joe Piscopo. I was born a white boy but I like to rap black. (Beatboxing sounds) Music is supposed to be pleasant to listen
to. (???) Are we a bunch of funky honkeys are what? Can we get jiggy with it? Why is he facing away from everyone? For shizzle ladies and gentlmen. (laughs) For shizzle. Throughout this spectacular extravaganza of
talent Joe plays quite a few instruments. Saxophone, the guitar, the piano, drums And the flute. We love you, we appreciate it very much and
we'll see you next time. Goodnight everybody, thank you so much. Good get the [ ] out of there. Take a drink
please. Let us now get into the main subject matter
How Sweet It Is baby. Please give me fifty bucks so I can buy crack. It's been a while since I've covered a really
bad obscure movie and I thought this movie How Sweet it is was
the perfect material. Come here. I find the washed up Joe Piscopo character
endlessly fascinating. He takes a lot of pride in being an Italian
American, and so in this musical they have to cram in a bunch of references to Italian
things. The story just doesn't make any sense. Joe Piscopo plays a man named Jack Cosmo Who is a washed up theater director trying
to make his last great show to pay off a debt he owes to some gangsters. Jack Cosmo? What kind of stupid name is that? Jack Cosmo. Yeah just some grab some breakfast, go back
to my place... uh just... Jack Cosmo! I... I'm sorry is there something that you're
trying to tell me. Just look at the title card, it looks like
it's for a failed nickelodeon cartoon. There is a a short song over the opening credits. Jack Cosmo is hanging out in an alleyway and
he is approached by two gentlemen. It's implied that these two gentlemen are
gay. Which is cool, that's fine and all, but it
seems like from the dialogue they're trying to have some exchange for sexual
favors if you know what I mean. "Twenty to see it, fifty to touch" That's supposed to be the joke of the scene
is that he's prostituting himself or so you think. When they get to his apartment and he reaches
into his pocket, you think he's going to pull out his shlong. But he just pulls out a key to a trophy case
behind him. This movie is like an endurance test. A second later theres a knock on the door.
It's three gangsters sent by Paul Sorvino they punch him in the face. Then with the door wide open this gangster
puts a silencer on his gun. It's such a tiny silencer. Then he fake kicks this guy in the nuts and
jumps out the window. Just a horrible set, music choices. Just listen
to the music at this part. (goofy music) It turns out Paul Sorvino's character is a
huge fan of musical theater And he wants Jack Cosmo to write a stage production
for him otherwise he's going to kill him It's his last chance to write a great musical
for everyone to love and for him to be in the spotlight once again. Oh my the subtext. It's astonishing. Where did you go? I mean it's been ten years right since the
last production? Show business makes what you do for a living
seem like daycare. Another issue with this scene is that it goes
on for way to long And the only purpose it serves is to establish
his character and that Jack Cosmo owes him a bunch of money. I still commend Paul Sorvino's effort trying
to elevate this material that is total dogshit. You know what I'm gonna call it? How Sweet It Is! Like candy. Exactly. That is wonderful. You think? Guys, is this not a great idea? Everybody loves stories about candy. I love skittles. I'm glad you like it... I do. Because I want you to make it. I.. I'm sorry? Yeah you're going to produce and write and
direct my show. This is gonna be your comeback. I'm gonna
finance it myself. Where are we gonna stage this thing? I just took a strip club off a woman who couldn't
pay me back the money I lent her for her husbands penile surgery. He should already be working on the show but
instead we're slogging through this scene. Paul Sorvino is in a wheelchair and then he
just gets up and he's like "Ah I was just kidding I got that wheelchair
off a cripple who owed me a bunch of money" or something like that. There's a scene with Paul Sorvino later, he's
eating a bunch of spaghetti and he gets some sauce on his suit. And he says "This isn't the kind suit I wear
on this day when I'm eating this kind of spaghetti." Another character that takes too long to set
up is this FBI agent, his name is Ethan Trimble And to get to the Mafia they're going to plant
this FBI agent undercover in Jack Cosmo's new theater production. He knows who Jack Cosmo is. Ten years ago this guy was huge. So what? Ten years ago my wife didn't look
like her mother. This joke is also in the trailer even though
they use a different angle. Ten years ago my wife didn't look like her
mother. My wife didn't look like her mother! ...Wife didn't look like her mother. Hey, how do you even know about this guy? Minored in musical theater in college. Really what did you major in? Crying in the
shower? Jack Cosmo is auditioning a bunch of people
for his show. The entire joke of this audition sequence
is that every single person who auditions is bad. This persons issue is that he's a crack addict. (Singing) Please give me fifty bucks so I
can buy crack (Choir) That would be a very very very good
choice. Yes it would! A choir starts singing in the middle of his
number even though there's no choir present in the scene Due to copyright I cannot play the entire
song I can however read you the lyrics. So here are the lyrics to first give me fifty
bucks so I can buy crack. You cannot find the lyrics anywhere because
this is not a real song that has been heard by lots of people I had to view the movie and write down the
lyrics for you. My name is Clifton and I live down the block
I used to have a house, but now I have a box. I may be in debt, but I’ll pay it back
But first give me fifty bucks so I can buy crack Oooh
That would be a very very very nice thing For you to do
Because my insides are beginning to sting And it hurts when the other junkies laugh
at me Because I got my drugs from I crime family Fifty bucks will do the trick. I don't like this musical number we can move
on and I'll never mention it again. A character by the name of Kristina auditions
and she seems to do a good jobs except she has anger issues. I am the boss of you. This scene has to reference Back to the Future
for no reason. They found me I don't know how but they found
me Oh god they found me I don't know how but
they found me What the [ ] Why was that in the movie? Run for it Marty! Run for it! What does this have to do with Back to the
Future? Is there some kind of obscure Italian American
symbolism in Back to the Future That made them want to reference it in this
movie? Then the FBI mole auditions and he actually
does a pretty good job. Jack Cosmo already takes a liking to him. Getting the show together is a disaster. Joe
constantly drinks, his songs suck. Ethan wants the show to go on because if there's
no show then they can't catch the mafia. That's the logic of the plot, they're going
to arrest the mafia at the show So Ethan and the FBI hunt down Jack Cosmo's
daughter We're introduced to her doing aerobics with
her cleavage out. Wow look at that heat signature. She's hot. She opens the door and he stares right down
at her breasts. Want to... Hi. This is a great start to their relationship. Their interactions are so corny. Everyone deserves a second chance. Second? Try again. Third? Higher. Okay, he's really trying. And it's so obvious where their relationship
is going to go. With the help of Sarah Cosmo, Jack Cosmo is
able to get back on his feet, stop drinking and write a great show. Ethan delivers coffee in this one part and
he think's the coffee's expensive so he's like "are you going to spot me some cash?" To which they say "this is just part of show
business kid" and then they sing a whole song about it. We didn't need a whole song about this shit.
And the number itself is just [ ] horrible. Welcome to showbiz you cookoo kid. The climax of the movie is basically just
the show. Before the show even starts Ethan tells Jack
and Sarah that he's an FBI plant to which they have like a "eh" reaction. You lied to me? Yes. Yes, can get mad at me later. Don't tell me when I can get mad at you. Look look look I'm trying to make this right.
Look look look look That's our agent I need you to find a way
to get that guy away from Mike for the rest of the show. And you can't let that guy that guy and especially that guy get suspicious of
what you're doing. This FBI agent acts so suspicious the entire
show, he keeps talking into his sleeve. ETHAN! That's the most suspicious action you could
do. ETHAN! The show itself is supposed to be a metaphor
for Jack Cosmos inner struggles But what is Jack Cosmo learning from any of
this? I preferred A Night at Club Piscopo, I loved
when he was rapping. (Homer Simpson Beatboxing) I'm Mr. Plow and I'm here to say Ethan has a scene with Kristina. Jack Cosmo
gives her a thumbtack to press against her skin which will apparently calm her down. She has a thumbtack around her neck and she
presses it into her boob. This is great. That was a lot of setup for a lame joke. Just describing all of that gives the urge
to walk into oncoming traffic. I regret ever seeing this film. There are five songs in this movie that we
see performed. The opening which doesn't really count cause
it's just over the opening credits. The crack number, the welcome to showbiz kid
song and the final show has two songs in it. These
songs are horrendous. (Singing) To blow your mind! The choreography is really bad. Why the [ ] do
they have their asses in the air? The FBI try arresting Paul Sorvino in the
middle of the show And you're under arrest. Pop we gotta get out of here. No I've been set up, by him back there. Everybody
out of here! (Screaming) Oh no! This is why it was a bad idea to arrest him
in such a public setting. You gave me my life back man. (piano note) Please, don't take it away. So they arrest Paul Sorvino and he even thought
he was about to kill everyone and they entire audience left They decide to put on one final musical number
just for Jack Cosmo to enjoy And he is brought to tears by seeing the beauty
of his vision come to life. How Sweet It Is! By the end of the film I felt as if nothing
was accomplished and that's perhaps my biggest criticism of the entire thing. No one learned anything. What the hell was
the point of this movie even? A few of his cast members got together, Jack
Cosmo wrote one last great play? It seems like a light-hearted family film
for most of it, but then there's all of this [ ] bizarre humor. This comes off as an ego project for Joe Piscopo,
something that's supposed to put him back in the spotlight Ironically, kind of like Jack Cosmo. But the fact of the matter is this is a very
obscure movie. When I first saw the movie And I checked the ratings online there were
like forty ratings. So let's read some of the Reviews that How Sweet It Is got. I bet these
are gonna be a lot of fun. My mom wanted to watch this because it was
billed as a musical (it's not) And the musical numbers that there are in
the movie are kind of in the context of an audition Or a show. Just like this review says... "The rest of the numbers stem from auditions
and in scenes from the play ultimately writes How Sweet It Is." (Choir) Cosmo. Cosmo. That's me baby. Every single character in this movie is a
cartoon. The supporting characters in this movie are not resolved that well. For example, Clifton the crackhead. He's trying
to get over the memory of his dead mothers mole, which is why he smokes so much crack. There's a scene where one of the gagsters
dresses up as a mole and he confronts his inner demons, having to do something with
the mole. You've been smoking too much crack. You gotta
stop. Clifton basically just gets off crack. Just as long as the party tonight does not
include any crack. (Phone rings) Hello? I gotta take this, Clifton. He seems to actually be doing very well for
himself. Unfortunately during the show One of the performers has a giant mole which
scares the shit out of him And now he's most likely back on crack again. Every other character serves little to no
purpose aside from making lame jokes. The last we see of the FBI and the Mafia they
just walk off and go to jail. Not that I wanted more than that, that would
mean the movie would be longer. If there's one saving grace of How Sweet It
Is it's that the runtime is really short. I couldn't help but find parallel's between
Jack Cosmo and Joe Piscopo. Joe Piscopo with a Hollywood career behind
him was hoping to make comeback with this unfunny, ugly looking film. I burn inside for you! We're gonna make it girl. You and me. Oh I'm gonna make you. Kimberly! And Joe got divorced in 2006. You can find the Kimberly clip it's called
Prepare to cringe...Joe Piscopo performs "Kimberly." What really sparked my interest recently was
I saw a documentary with him in it. He makes a short cameo and he's dancing. Go Joe! Go Joe!
der he is
Joe Piscopo is such a joke. I learned about this movie when Opie and Anthony discovered it.