HoneyDew #57 | Tim Dillon

this episode of the honeydew was brought to you by Omax health more on that later I want to tell you about some dates I have coming up here February 22nd I'm at the ice house in Pasadena out in Pasadena California February 22nd March 19th through the 21st I'm back in Phoenix at the house of comedy come on out Phoenix and April 23rd through the 25th I'll be up in Vancouver that's my first time up there looking forward to that so come on out check out the shows you're watching the honeydew with Ryan Sickler action mom's house [Music] [Applause] welcome back to the honeydew y'all we're over here at studio jeans doing it at your mom's house I'm Ryan Sickler Ryan Sickler on all social media Ryan Sickler com go to the website sign up for the newsletter go check out my dates I don't have my phone on me right now but February 22nd I'm a headlining the Ice House in Pasadena I will be back in Phoenix in March I think its Vancouver in April go to Rio Seco calm check out the dates I'll be in Edmonton this year Minneapolis I'll be back in Baltimore I'm coming to New York I want to see Chicago in Seattle this year I'm gonna get out there so make sure you go there for all the dates the website for the show here the honey-do podcast com that's where you can go get all the merch all the updates all the social media links make sure you're following us over there and subscribe to your mom's house YouTube page and as I say every week thank you for the messages they're coming in everywhere I can't even keep up with them and I [ __ ] love you for it I love this show I love that it's resonating with you and I loved it the people come on here and sit down and open up we're all going through some [ __ ] every everybody's going through some [ __ ] so if you can get away from it a little bit and laugh at it it's a great thing we highlight the low lights over here and as you know these are the stories behind the storytellers and today's storyteller is a return guest first time on video ladies and gentlemen Tim Dillon's on ah thank you so much thank you coming back look who's that your mom's house guy yeah I did it I made it I made it to the mecca it's uh you know how can you enjoy me without video you know that's a translucent Irish skin blister up in real time in front of you how could you possibly but you knew you hear my voice and then you hear the tragedy of what I'll say and then I think the physical just brings it all together it's where people got rounds oh oh yeah because that's what the show is right you want it you want to hear sad things from sad people that make it funny I mean that's what the show is it's an exercise in masochism it is and you bring people on and they talk about their horrible lives and you know and some of the people you have on a successful and some of the people like me that are just cloth we're still clawing you're now hauling and it's not it's nice to watch people look at a lot of your gas and go will they be people that I know in five years or will they be dead in the street that's what this show really is people are going hey I wonder if that guy will be a household name or they find of dead in a hotel in Tampa what the show is that's what the show is the best version of the show is let's bring these people on we don't know if they're gonna be successful statistically it's a real uphill battle and you know I give you longer than five yeah why appreciate Fame and if anybody wants to come see me Tim I think comedy mode every Tim Miller comedy calm you know February we're xanies in Chicago 5th through the 8th of February the grand jerrod Theatre in Ontario Canada the 14th and the 15th New York caroline's March 12 through 14 that'll be a big show it's my homecoming I'm from New York I live here now Corey and it's really gonna be fun Bloomington Minneapolis house at comedy April Phoenix Arizona has a comedy made comic strip in Edmonton something in Vancouver whatever Tim Dylan comedy calm Tim Jay Dylan di ll1 on Instagram and Twitter and I put all that stuff there too well thank you for coming back oh well thank you for having yeah you were you were one of my early audio guests only I didn't want to stop podcasting I jumped right in after Rafi scented the next week kicking off this honey bee it was a therapeutic time when I did the show that's the first time I really met you and yeah I'm talk to you or anything yeah we're so open and honest yeah if you haven't heard Tim's first episode you have to go back and listen because we'll be jumping off from there but you talked about your mom was a mermaid and yarda at what's it called again the Weeki Wachee mermaid so many people have sent me this yeah I know a lot of people it connects with a lot of people you know and there's a lot of people out there that have had it pretty rough yeah they know all about the Weeki Wachee mermaids in Florida which my mother my mother by the way very proud of that job it's not something that she is hidden and it's not something she has called at her favorite job real many times what is your mom done so wait that's in front of when we would go out when I'd have a friend as a kid we'd go out to dinner and my mother would go I'm was a mermaid in Florida and it was my favorite job and of course people would be that would be the last playdate people are in the same yeah your dad was a musician that's a musician met your mom there he met my mother loves awesomes and he was a Long Island really good musician but didn't take it to the next level because he never left Long Island because the the pull of a bacon egg and cheese sandwich ah is too much he didn't go further but like I knew he was good because he doesn't really talk about that he was good but I will meet other people from Long Island it were like Oh your dad was like really yeah he had a great band and everybody loved you super talented and you know but it was like you know I just think he never pushed it and then he had me and then he got you know he got a sales job and whatever and but I came from that like and as he I can't remember as he passed no he's still alive he's still alive and listens to most things I do but he he had a studio in our house when we grew up where he would make music uh and try to like you know he'd have a bunch of mixers and everything and he would do jam with his friends and everything so he was and then he would still play out in bars when I was growing up like he would play in bars on the weekends you know at the coyote grill and I you know in Long Island New York you know yeah so it never launched quite obviously it never went anywhere but he's still very good at it and and at a family party he'll take out his guitar and start playing so do you see him off wait so let's go back and get recap you your parents split your mom is I believe like my cousin a paranoid schizo or annoyed schizophrenic although a hostage you know an institution it's we kind of had enough with her you know well that's the thing with the phrenic it's fun for a while yes but like anything else starts to wear on you so we locked her up and she's good I visit her I visit her a lot Oh me yes and the last time I visited her she said I just I she sat me down she goes I hope you're grateful about all the great things Donald Trump is doing for this country oh my and I said okay and she goes she goes all Donald Trump she just she goes I don't know why everyone's mad at him he just doesn't want Muslims to kill us and she goes I don't know why aunt Donna's mad at him for that aunt Donna I don't know why maybe and I don't want some Muslims to come coach because I don't want Muslims to come cause I was like well this is and then she asked if I could get her and make America great again hat and I said no promises but I might so she's doing good she's hey well I guess she's not all wrong she's not all right I'm in a certain line live in a world of nuance that stand out from your first episode you said she mentioned something to you about your weight and you were like hey how about you worry about you yeah you're not you're in a she's also obese but when I when I saw her here's the thing about my mother she does understand things yeah the last time she saw me she goes I said hello this is true I said hello Merry Christmas and she said Oh Merry Christmas she goes and then the first words out of her mouth she goes you are too fat to be on TV consistently she goes they will put you on every now and then but you were too fat and she goes if you lose weight maybe someone will give you money to fix your teeth and I said I don't even know I don't even know if that would work I don't even know who would do that and then I was thinking maybe he's right if I lost 50 pounds would my agent fix my teeth I mean they're not bad but I could tap them but so she's kind of like brutal but not always wrong yeah no I know I talked to my cousin and I can see these by they're like these pockets of clarity yeah I'm like whoa whoa we're having a real one here yeah he's with it he's clear yeah I'm just he's thin it's not that that you know that lost ID glossy right away in the deep space yeah yeah um you also talked about and I will never forget this it is IIIi don't know why I curse you a little bit for cuz I think about it on random days yeah you talked about how you were a teenager and used to go to this crack house and you would do drugs but hold on yeah and there was a filthy cigarette burn stained blanket and a couch and you would hold that blanket up yeah and you would take naps on that couch and I was like oh that is so disgusting and you said what did I say you said you loved it I said I loved it I don't know I don't really trust anyone who hasn't done that I gotta be honest yeah I don't trust anyone who hasn't pulled a cigarette staying blanket over themselves a burned blanket you had a crack house you have to try to experience the range of human experience I don't know what to tell you like you know sometimes you people are in pain all over the place right we know that oh but there's also a lot of ther listen there was a lot of fun in that in that crack here there were a lot of positive people I mean I know I mean genuinely genuinely grateful and positive people like there were people there that if you gave them a cigarette would act like you paid for their college so to me it's like how bad can it be like they they were so I just remember how happy if you gave someone a cigarette they would be happy and it's like I know people with oodles of money and fame that just can't figure out how to be happy you're right about that and and there's something just so beautiful and simple it's a buying area being a drug addict is a binary existence you're either high on drugs or you're looking for drugs there's a clarity to that it's not you don't want to live like that I'm not saying do it right but it gives you a focus the honey of my friendo I once heard that that you know there's a it was on the internet somewhere but it said that that crackhead is gonna get up today and he's gonna go hustle for that [ __ ] crack and he's gonna get that crap absolutely are you gonna let a crackhead out hustle you what are you watching Gary Vee are you gonna let that crackhead out hustle you do you know what that crackhead does he grinds he hustles rides his [ __ ] teeth there's a business inside of every crackhead I watched him today though and he said the very thing you did he mentioned friends he has that have make $50,000 a year and they're happier than some of the people he knows that have 100 million in the bank from the silicon boom I know it doesn't buy happy it doesn't buy happiness I helps it how it [ __ ] L but living in that environment right not living in it but being in it you know and and and and seeing it kind of gave me an understanding of like you know what generational poverty was because a lot of those people had children that's okay so let's let's talk about that because you're how old you're a teenager I'm 17 right now God your whole life every front of you know I mean I'm 17 currently I'm very big on tik-tok I'm what they call young sexy Hollywood I walk down the street and Hollywood producers my mother said the other day by the way she goes there's a lot of Hollywood producers that try to have sex with children has anyone tried to have sex with you I said I'm I look like I'm 64 I don't know what how old would a producer have to be Stan Lee yeah someone has to be to be a lot easier 40 your child in eighth grade you're a child in a cryptographer yeah surrounded by mostly adults they're adults and then my other who I do have kiss Shea went with me and hung out with me and my also said you heard an adult one time say if one of them Odie's we have to roll him up in the rug and put him out back yep what do we yeah I mean yeah we laughed at that did we you know because it's of course like it's funny one of them said to the wife it was I don't to mention their names because I still on Facebook by the way everyone is on Facebook I thought they were all dead then I went on Facebook and they're all on Facebook but you know it's funny I did another podcast where I talked about being a subprime mortgage guy yeah everybody I was with was a thief it'll kill their mother-in-law and lie and cheat and steal and then they won't message my own Instagram and say brother I heard that podcast I love what you're doing you pegged us it was brilliant it was beautiful like I hadn't remembered those days and so long I felt things I was crying I was laughing I was like oh but it's enough because you can't you know yeah um but the thing about being young in that environment was we knew we shouldn't have been there and we heard the guy say to the trickled ayzik what if one of these [ __ ] kids are these what are we gonna do roll him up a like rug it's ramen a thing and you know we just left because it was like we got it we understood we shouldn't have been there you know I mean so how does it skew your view of adults as you then get that do you ever what would you how would you say they were cuz you said they had kids thirty was probably in their late 20s or early 30s and I was maybe 13 or 14 I was in eighth grade uh it was the year was 1999 I remember that I remember that New Year's 1998-99 uh they were living in my town in the mayor's son a house that Mayor son was renting or whatever it was maybe three to four rooms in the house and every family had a room like that's how you knew it was kind of was like one room was to peep to people right the other room was a woman and her three kids the other room and then and everybody at the house and some guy slept on the couch and everybody at the house you know would do drugs I mean well it was I say crack house but was mostly cocaine and there was a lot of weed and there was drinking I think some people were doing crack we weren't doin crap but it's like it was a drug house it was drugs being sold there were deals being made there were you know people getting in and out of jail it was just one of those houses where if you wanted to purchase drugs in my town and here's the thing we were 13 14 we had nowhere to with you know and it was cold it's it's no nilanium of all family well it's December I'm freezing right so in the fall yeah sure it's fun to walk around outside in the spring but in the dead of winter you got to go somewhere so we found this place and the people they were very welcoming and hospitable to us and we would buy weed there and cocaine there and do it there with them and you just kind of like have fun and meet people and it was kind of like a teen night for me and my friend and it was again it you know it was not you know my parents they didn't know we were doing this they thought we liked walking right my parents are boomers and with all due respect you know no generation has cared less about their children that boot they just it wasn't raising us wasn't part of the thing for most of the boomer generation teachers didn't they would go here's off some Wendy's now go get molested they didn't know just what it was they didn't really concern themselves it was all about them it was all about them so they would just feed it really was a fetus poison let's go to Pizza Hut yo here's a big pizza and then go walk around our town for five hours figure something out what they thought we were doing but we weren't you know I'm we were to cry I mean they didn't know we're in a crack house they thought we were like hanging out in the schoolyard or something and we were like you know we were just hanging out with these people but what it showed me was that adults weren't always authority figures which I kind of knew so that was a big thing right learning about those like adults aren't authority figures and then I also saw like there were kids are out of house I'm like [ __ ] how are these kids gonna have any shot at life being raised in this type of environment and then I also not to get political but I was like what could you do like as a government what could you do for these people now I'm sure there are things you could do but like I was always skeptical because then I would hear like I would go to like you're getting high school in college or whatever and people will be like here's how to fix poverty here's how to fix this and I'm like but you don't know anything cuz you've never been right so you have no idea you're just looking at them you know so I was always like yeah it's it's deep complex these issues or there's a lot of a lot of issues that intersect and and make it very hard I think not that I'm not saying the government shouldn't do more for people they should but it's very difficult to pinpoint exactly what needs to be done because these cases are very like complex like you have a lot of people with bad or no jobs very little education really addicted to drugs the only way they're making money is selling drugs you have kids being raised in that type of environment what can you do to truly break that cycle it's very difficult well what finally got you out of there um so my parents I was living with my mother my parents got divorced and they got divorced in sixth seventh grade now they they announced they were gonna get divorced in fifth grade but then they didn't have the money to get divorced so they brought in a mediator they didn't have the money for lawyers they brought in a mediator who would sit at my dining room table to the house and divide up the divide up all of the all of their spoils and you remember this yes all of the things the day you know they would have a toaster oven and yet the beanie babies the collections of McDonald's toys Riyad lamp oh yeah that's right because your mom would I'm uh that's right you told that survivor yelling and get McDonald's toys and beanie babies and has trucks and everything so they wouldn't divide their estate I guess is the time you know my dad and Hurd divided up whatever I think she took most of that and he got a lamp or whatever and it was two years and was hellish you know in terms of like date again they just weren't concerned being parents I love both of them they weren't concerned with parenting it was obviously your mom had something going on quite a lot going on and my she was a schizophrenic yeah and even worse than that my father was in a band it's like what are you gonna do so and I again they were called you I mean you gotta remember this was a generation of people that were like they were at Woodstock and then ten years later my dad was selling office equipment like what the [ __ ] you didn't know what happened so I get it I mean my mother got married in a puka shell neck he had a powder-blue suit on and they got married on a beach and then years later Reagan's in office and they they're [ __ ] trying to figure out what a home equity loan is oh I get it I get how much it all turned okay oh well aware this is what happened so they why they got divorced and then I live with mom for two years and then as I lived with mom i drugged it up I was I was my dad was gone my mother was gone out of state or other in Jersey I was trying to figure out how to become a person sexuality was weird cuz I was like oh I kind of don't like girls like the way all my friends do whatever III hadn't you know coos when you're seventh grade eighth grade that stuff starts to yeah so then the drugs became a thing to like medicate and kill those thoughts and then also I was unsupervised because I had my grandmother was really trying to watch me and my buddy if anybody's trying to govern a teenager you know you just you're out you're doing things you're and what happened was I started to kind of spiral so a decision was made to have me go live with my father in ninth grade because your mom at this point she can't hold a job or anything yeah she's starting to have a real problem with holding a job it's you know it's very tough for her to hold a job because she'll swim though right she can still swim good talking about people that are following her she's talking about all these things that's what I would always also my mother I don't know how much I got into this my mother to keep her house Long Island rents the house out did I go into this I don't remember okay like she'll and people come in she rents rooms out in the house and who is renting rooms in houses crap deal move into my house and by the way if you've ever had your mother rent rooms to cocaine dealers when you're in eighth grade and you know how convenient it's just easy it's so convenient to buy cocaine at breakfast which I was watching a drug dealer may flip pancakes and then we would do like them so but it was a good time if it was all bad I would tell you drugs drugs work cigarettes work they were hats are like 90 dollars the package is like it kills you no one cares it just showed that no drugs don't work forever and there's other things you should do instead of them yes but I mean this was an era but are these people you know yes I know these from my time you know them from my town I remember hanging out my town one day and some guy going we're going to buy an ounce of weed we're going to 269 Madison Avenue which is where I used to live and there and I'm like can I get a ride with you and like are you buying something there I said I lived it and like really I was like yeah I would walk into a house and see my mother and and and big drug dealers from my town I mean not the Sinaloa cartel but big for long I like eating baked clam and this was the time to of really great baked clams really good really good Long Island seafood and I would walk in and be like hi mom hi drug dealer I've known for a long time eating baked clams you know she rented a room to a guy named Dennis who was not a drug dealer but he was he loved to drink and uh in my show that Tim Dylan shell I've told her story a bunch and it's become like the de-facto saying of my show life in the big city because Dennis no matter what you said to Dennis he would use goat life in the big city um and and like weep my mother said to him once you know your kids haven't spoken you in five years uh they called the other day you were drunk and you answered the phone drunk and they hung up and now they don't want to speak to you ever again and Dennis would go he would have a Burger King cup with wine in it and I wine and Marlboro Reds and he would go life in the big city you know my mother would go the house is gonna be foreclosed on you're gonna be homeless life in the big city he lived in her van for six months after six monix months after and he would say to us he'd go hey I'm living in a van that's life in the big city what was great about this I'm pretty sure dad had never been to a city no other than Vietnam or wherever he went but that's not a city but you know what I mean like the biggest city but he had a great attitude about the the trials and tribulations of life the waves that hit us all he would say life in the big city you know oh you lost your job life in the big city your brother hates you because he's accusing him stealing his money life he was a great like I I appreciated the way he looks roll right off of them breeze through it all you know it's it really isn't way to go and he died as most people that are like him do shark fishing in Montauk he just God he clutched his heart when they're on the boat and it was over and these are the things these are the deeds of the stories but show so ego is your mom also using it though she's not really not and she kind of knows that they are doing something she know you're using she's on bail he knows that I'm like smoking pot she doesn't know that I'm buying it there she hasn't inkling that I'm smoking pot but he's also schizophrenic so she's all over the place like I remember one time we had dropped acid from from the guy upstairs and and she was screaming what's wrong with your eyes I can't believe what heaps wrong with you and then she just started screaming I can't believe I'm with all these drug addicts drug addicts alcoholics Riggin and Dennis just open his door that's it patty it's just acid shut the [ __ ] up oh sure he got a you'd ruin anyone's trip get the [ __ ] in your room and I would this guy really is an advocate of mine it was just you know she was not happy that I was using drugs she was angry about it but she was trying to save her house and she rented rooms to these people did it work that she saved them how did it work yes Ryan it all turned out just fine all the drug addicts and her they all live half ever after what a great question did it work no yes it worked didn't it sound like it was worth how long but it work in a minute really worked for tears yeah so she basically so she sorry I had to text that's one of the drug dealers she's not kiddin she tried to hold on in this house ah I still remember you know being in eighth grade living in this house um living how many bedrooms was three upstairs three upstairs uh one downstairs you her and then she'd rent those two uh she had one room downstairs Dennis had a room downstairs I had a room upstairs and then she rented two upstairs and then then I then there was another little room downstairs and then eventually I went downstairs and she rented that third room she rented to a woman named Michelle once who was just a fun just a fun you know there are people that are just fun they're just fun and we would this woman at an old Lincoln Towncar never lost interest me and my friend would just get in her car and we'd blast lines of coke and smoke cigarettes and she would just drive around our town while you're doing the coke and smoking cigarettes yeah this woman Michelle how do you drive an Audi well do coke and we I was like 13 14 now we'd all drive around the town and and and she would just be like these people a real white trash and I'm like yeah [ __ ] those people they're real trash and and she was just fun again she was wild lady she was fun um I think that I don't know what happened her I don't know what happened a lot of people I they actually all survived they're all kind of amazing they do you know dies like good people you're right that's really the real right good people get bring happy more like roaches yeah people are just around so I think it was a decision made by my mother and my father that we got to get him out of this environment and he's got to go live with my dad so I went to my dad and I went moved in with my dad in ninth grade and I went to Catholic school and I found out that nobody in Catholic school did drugs and then I sobered up and then every was fine kidding I was gonna I found out that drugs are actually better in big backyard swimming pools and people at Lexus's it was great and I learned about my love of real estate you know I would love property and I didn't know that until I met really rich kids I could do cocaine with in Catholic school so my parents introducing me to a better class of drug addict was very smart of them you know long term yeah so that's what I moved in with my dad and I went to Holy Trinity diocesan high school it was a it was a hip Catholic school like the teachers would make out with the kids I'm kidding but that did happen [ __ ] that it happened twice two times two times not to me to the hot kids we get it but so they get caught yeah yeah we'll have people got fired it was a problem I have women female teachers or was it all boys school all men nosey co-ed and co-ed rubbers school in Hicksville Long Island right by the village green with Billy Joel wrote that song you remember those days hanging out by the Village Green and it was his Long Island as you could get like it was just it was pretty I would say middle solidly middle class with a sprinkling of wealthy kids mm-hmm solidly middle class again for Long Island that might not be the middle class for Kansas but middle class meaning that you know my friends lived in Leavitt houses you know it would and a few kids had sprawling you know big one kid live next to Vinny Testaverde like some people had but pretty much it was a somewhat middle-class school it wasn't a Pratt school it wasn't a bunch of rich kids but there were a few of them and it was you know it was where I spent four years of high school and at that point I started to transition and you know I wasn't so what I did was like I stopped when I moved with my dad I you know during ninth grade I was still doing blow and during a little bit of 10th grade but then I started to just kind of I phased out of that and I phased into like just kind of drinking I found drink eleventh grade because that was what everybody else did you know came before drinko came before now you know which is my family crest low before liquor you know but what happened was I wanted to fit in with these kids so what happened was I wanted to fit in with these kids which means that I what Yuma call it that I wanted to do what they were doing god I wanted to do what they were doing and what were they drinking what was back then whiskey yeah anything we could get our hands on I mean I was never a beer drinker I never drank anything with bubbles so I was dragging like hard liquor I hate carbonation I drink don't drink soda don't do any of that so when eleventh grade I was like I want a drink and smoke pot or whatever these kids are doing so I want to fit in with them and I don't want to hang out with these you know and it by that time that the house had been broken up it'll moved upstate you know and I what about dating in high school for you did I mean not no real dating I mean I would hook up with girls because that was what I was trying to do I was trying to be straight so I'd hook up with girls but it wasn't like it was kind of to show off but you know trying to be straight for who for everybody I mean it was a Long Island Catholic school it was 2002 I knew just a different time now kids are like gay at four you know they're like trans at seven they're leading a march at nine leaving a mark not it's not you know it's different it's different now gay people like I'm a gender Van EULA cannot even get but they don't care it's like they're like but on Instagram it says aiyah it's like whatever so now people just like whatever identity we'll do you know as long as I don't have to have a personality so you're worried about the image at the time lead or all well all of it I wanted France yeah and I didn't think I would have friends if I was like you know and I also did you have any other gay friends at the time was it no no out at all or not he's quietly to each other people that were out in high school there were uh I and I was fine with them like it I wasn't but I don't think I wasn't friendly with them I was a popular kid like I tried to be popular and I got nominated for homecoming king in the beginning of high school I wasn't popular but that I tried to be found because I wanted to be popular and I wanted people to like me so I like got nominated for homecoming king in senior year like a popular person whatever the hell that means I was once a party's know that [ __ ] so I that was more important to me than living an honest life you know still is don't live in LA you know so the thing is I yeah I mean if I come out of the closet earlier I would went to a liberal arts college and been happier and not funny and I wouldn't do this for a living maybe I would have been able to control my drug use whatever I'd be like all the other gay comics who would suck I'm kidding I'm kidding but gray I'm Kay it's a joke but yeah it's when I look back I go yeah there were kids who were out so I always say like I don't blame the environment I could have been stronger I could have been more I don't blame the environment I try not to blame environments for things even though that's the rage I try not to blame anyone it was all about me because I wanted to just be popular kid I could have came out of the closet and had like three friends that are like using my daughter hard friends I wanted to be popular and you know so that was more important to me than being true so you have a lot going on there's a lot going on there's a lot coherence your hammer boil all the turmoil prepare like I felt like a lot of the problem with it's hard I think for certain gay people that don't identify like they're not the stereotype of what a gay person is so it's hard for them because they're like well I don't fit in here but I kind of don't fit in there either so it's like you're in this weird place and there's a lot of people I know now that are either more private about it or they're not like they're just whatever like they're just like hey I live my life I do what I want I don't because now there's this agenda of all these things you have to agree with and I don't think there's a lot of gay people that you agree with on all of those things like now it's like men and women don't exist and you're like whoa wait a minute well that that actually flies in the face of gay because if like if you're if you're attracted to dudes and there's a woman because why identifies it to you go well you could identifies whatever you want but to me you're a woman like so it's this weird contradictory space now where I think a lot of people are kind of confusing everything is very confusing now but back then I think it was just the same it was just motivated by fear and not wanting to you know being be uncool so did you have a girlfriend through through high school I would go out with girl I would go out with people I mean it wasn't like I saw there was a girl that I liked was very fun to hang out with who still a friend of mine I mean there there you know you would just I would just try to make out the girl at a party and have everybody be like yeah how cool is that well you told the story about the guy you had met online yeah I met a guy who's that your first experience yeah I think so yeah 100% when what age was that again and you don't have to know that whole story first year of college it was just a firefighter that I met in a hotel room in Brooklyn and he wasn't really a firefighter he was he was like he was in a firefighter training program or something when I was after not falling through dive no [ __ ] he was like oh yeah I'm gonna say you know I'm I was you know and then he he said he learned he was gay during a trip to Italy or whatever and I'm like but he was like a Guido guy who's ago you won't be kept saying I'm not going yeah kept saying I'm not gay I'm not gay you know which which if you blow somebody and they keep saying that you have to keep looking up a go no I know I know very strange it's an it's like an odd it's an odd interaction to have to beg yeah he was not that bright he said when we check in the hotel he's like he says to the guy behind the thing he's like yo we're not smoking crack in here or nothing and I'm like well why would you say that he's like I don't want people think it was smoking crack I'm like that's the best case thank people thinking about it that's our great cover story we should literally go buy crack right now and light it on fire in the corner of the room what is wrong with you but I haven't seen him since but I hope he's doing well probably not probably on Facebook something yeah they're all on face but all on face look up anyone that you think is dead they're on Facebook there's memorial pages on Facebook good comment oh really yeah I go that guy's dead and he comment I'm like what it's like Tommy's memorial but he's Tommy's memorial likes your picture of an omelet it's like God Tommy's commitment to breakfast is wild from the beyond so when do you start dating guys regularly when do you I mean I don't know dating anyone ever regularly I'm well after that experience you stop seeing women yeah or no no yes I'm trying to thank I was still dating but I wasn't like I think I was going out with dudes in in in you know after college I came out of the closet how old at 25 okay 20 I'm 34 now so I came out of 25 she was very late so you aren't you're 12 years only you're a baby so you had internet and that's what people when I think that like a baby I had internet yes so is that how you're meeting men are you meeting him in Craig's burger I would meet dudes on Craigslist I think I went to Community College I met a guy there but still it was very like I was still very inhibited about it it wasn't a big part of my life it wasn't like I think it's hard to imagine now because things have changed so much and have been so progressive but now it really is like a different world from where you know it was that even if you were out and comfortable and everything yeah then it's still a different world in his last 10 50 % I would meet people but I wasn't like introducing anyone to my parents and then I came out of 25 to your parents your my parents yeah oh I would I thought I was I want grandchildren and I'm like yeah that's what you need I look it back in the cage my dad typical boomer always like just make sure you take time to golf son you know or just as long as he just didn't have to work more hours I don't think it bothered him but it's you know it wasn't liked and I told my friends none of them cared so that's what I wanted to ask you was there this buildup of like oh my god yeah I know there's a few people I'm not close with now but I don't think it has anything to do with that you just move on in his friends but I don't think it really mattered to anyone it mattered more to you obvious I think it mattered to one of my friends who I was close with who but then was just a weird guy anyway and just married like a Russian woman at City Hall or something so like he was on his journey of strange I was gonna say yeah so I don't know where he is I think it mattered maybe the one person I don't think it really matter to anyone else no one cared from what I remember right no one cared you know let's take a quick break and tell you about our sponsor Oh max health whether you're an athlete a weekend warrior someone who deals with constant joint pain back pain muscle soreness or author itis finding a natural remedy that instantly works might seem non-existent most over-the-counter pain relievers such as icy hot and Benguet they only focus on one basic cooling effect like menthol which temporarily takes your mind off the pain until that pain returns in an hour so if you're looking to get rid of nagging muscle and joint pain immediately while providing long lasting recovery then you need to try the natural breakthrough pain relief solution cryofreeze CBD developed by o max health this non-prescription triple action pain relief roll-on is specially formulated to block pain receptors reduce inflammation and improve muscle and joint flexibility the best part is this 100% natural CBD power remedy works its 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Island and to say that people are unmotivated at Nassau Community College really doesn't even begin to describe the level of human filth and trash I mean I'm talking about Long Island girls in like terry cloth sweatpants in flip-flops on their razor phones screaming at their boyfriends in class lighting cigarettes right outside the window blasting music you know not doing anything and that's where I met my friend Kenny who's doing he had a Range Rover and had spiky hair and he goes listen I sell [ __ ] mortgages he was my debate partner he was your good talker you should just start selling mortgages he just [ __ ] this place and I'm like buddy I'm I had any [ __ ] this place and he's like we're gonna sell mortgages it's this great business you know there's so much money out there for people trying to buy houses and everybody's getting rich and you should just hang out with rich people so I'm like I should hang out with rich people and and and then I won't have to come out of the closet I won't have to do anything I'll just be rich enough or I can do what I want and I'm gonna get rich selling mortgages on Long Island and that was my goal and that's when I transitioned from a college kid to a 45 year old mortgage broker with a drinking problem who had tax liens you know that that was when I that was when I left I was your shift I left childhood and I be listen the old episode I was a child actress was like I really left it when I was six years old I started acting but when I really looked back and I said oh I left childhood it was like I left what I left college and I just went into the world of like you know mortgage guys in Long Island it was like well now any any hint of a college experience your going away or being a kid or having any regular college-age stuff did it happen so then I went to into the mortgage world and started making Bank though I started making some decent money you know especially for kid that age I was never did 20s mid 20s I bought a house I had no money but I still bought a house for $600,000 cuz I'm like [ __ ] badass and that was foreclosed on and taken learned what I learned from that what I learned from that is that I really just had the balls to make it happen as garyvee would say so I took his advice and I just hustled and grinded and I bought a home and then you know right after I bought a home and again people don't understand the mortgage thing people think that we were all like like everybody thinks it were like boiler room like we knew that it was all gonna crack nobody knew that I was giving cars out to my family I took one of these mortgages like at the end of the day there was predatory lending there was bad stuff going on but a lot of people you know America is not a ky I hate to break it to everybody I know America is not a country of victims it's a country of criminals and it's a country of people that are have varying degrees of success it started on the Boston Tea Party and everybody would send their dirty generous to be Americans of the subprime mortgage crisis going back to talk to like victims of other things like the Holocaust or anything right it's like oh what was done to you they were like I was given 200 grand I didn't deserve what yeah yeah you you misrepresented how much money you made you got a bigger loan than you deserved and and and it's like yeah there was predatory lending some of it was I guess racial I'm sure there was horrible [ __ ] that went on but to me I was selling mortgages to people that lived in Long Island that wanted man caves and pools you know that's the reality you know I remember going to a house in the Bronx that was right next to Montefiore Medical Center was an older white couple that would very tan and they were had to land they had like a fly shrimp in their house and there were flies collect and they were like we want to refinance it like about if your medical Santa's gonna buy this house we're gonna million monitor kept offering them to buy the house offering them offering an offering and they were like we're not budging until it's over a million and they were offered the eight hundred thousand I said take it what's the difference between side done it loan for the min ago what's the difference between 800 just take it you have nothing and they waited their monic your medicine the mods with your medical senators decided we you know we're gonna expand the hospital in the other direction and said [ __ ] those people Wow AB and it was crazy and then they and and those people so it's like greed is just we all have it and people can facilitate like it was just I bumped into so many cases of people that were just like I want more I deserve more and can you help me get more I bought a house at 22 for no goddamn reason you know and it went bad because I bought it in 2006 at the height of the market and the market literally crashed in 2007 and I stayed in the business to 2010 I mean I really oh yeah I'm still able to sell no but I was still able to go to an office you know hung over and you know call people no hi this is Tim dealing with cap star mortgage are you interested in uh you know have you and then I people get shot up you people are the worst people I was like um it was a sad office it was like nine guys still left in the business we're in an office it was windowless you were in Melville Long Island which was the mortgage corridor all these big banks were but now all these banks had gone out of business all the Range Rovers and beamers were out of the parking lots the parking lots were empty I mean literally it would be like humble weeds like blowing through it was like life after people it was his post-apocalyptic hellscape and I was in this office with nine other desperate people sitting there with leaks it was leaking there was like fruit flies that he didn't work and we were all trying to sell a product that nobody everybody kind of needed but nobody five four and it was the year was 2009 and it was very depressing and we were having sales meetings at Taco Bell because nobody had money and people's mothers were dropping them off to work it was insane it was insanely depressing and people would just stand in the parking lot and smoke cigarettes all day and talk about you know conspiracies and people would come into the office and they would be like you know I think Obama is in al-qaeda and I'd be like well I don't know about that but who knows you know could be you know and and it was just as really depressing time and I you know it was you know the saddest you know sales guy supposed to have money confidence yeah we had none of that left we've been broke and beaten down and broken and the dude who was kind of a head of the operation was this drunk named Bob Bob Adler Bob had lost his license for D we so we had to take turns driving him home he was our boss everyone up yeah yeah yeah and when you you have to drive your butt and you would fall asleep cuz you drink all day at Chili's and then he'd fall asleep on the way home in your car and then wake up like at a stoplight to just deliver a cryptic message like he'd be like I think we're in big trouble and you go what and then he go no no maybe laughter Park Avenue and so he would just deliver his cryptic messages this is how that company started you want to hear how this is that company so I pitched this as a show and nobody bought it are they [ __ ] not Sickler yeah so here's what happened this is how the company started this guy Bob was a high-level guy and a major mortgage lender in Long Island he's a CFO he sees that this company's gonna kind of crumble he sees the writing on the wall it's like we're in trouble we're holding on to a lot of bad debt this thing's just gonna go it's going left we got to get out so he pulls his buddy his body and him instead of evacuating the business right this is such a Long Island [ __ ] thing they go we're gonna do it the right way we have all this know how we're gonna put together a small company we're gonna do it the right way so they go up to this guy's house upstate which is partially done they're getting sauced they're talking about the new company they're gonna have whoever this other guy is I don't know falls through a 2nd floor that's not completely done and die no die come on while they're up there talking about the rack instead of abandoning the project Bob then walks around at his funeral and goes I just wanted that you know I'm gonna open the company for your father he was a good man he believed in tight lending standards we're gonna open this company the underwriting well it was crude the partner he started in death yeah it started in death and I worked there for about a year and a half very sad Christmas party very very soft yeah very sad I think we all got like a hero from a pizzeria and cut it like six ways and then just and I was still boozing it up boozing it hard boozing it hard boozing and where are you living in the house I'm living in my foreclosed home yeah it's I've rented it to a family who lives upstairs and I've also rented it to one of my mother's friends that she met in a mental institution we call him derelict Hill okay derelict Phil was a lounge singer from Vegas who never took off my mother met him in the hatch the booby hatch and she was there letting fill out and Phil needs a place to live so I said he can rent one of the rooms downstairs so I would come home and Phil would be playing Mack the Knife on a keyboard like a Casio keyboard Black Mack the Knife and then upstairs I rented it too they were like ministers it was like a nice black family they were like ministers and they were fine they just were you know like they were just religious people mm-hmm they lived upstairs darling Philip downstairs I was sleeping on a couch at this point downstairs working this horrible thing waiting for it all to come crashing down at this point I'm I have a boating accident with my friend's father bud he was so fun he's so much fun I got into boating accidents with him what do you mean well he's just a fun guy like he'd never worked and I think he might have sold drugs but he's literally never worked and we just did my friend lived in this little house in Freeport Long Island and we use to have the craziest parties there and like his father would steal like his father stole a fly throwing statue from someone else's yard just brought it back to a party one day he would shoot he did a paint a father would have a paintball gonna just shoot beers out of people's hands it was fun he was just like yeah that guy you know and he then had this little boat and take people out on the boat I would go out on the boat with them and we'd have a lot of fun we'd get hammered and you just drive around the boat and then so we want the first time we crashed we ran up on a mart a marsh and it was like fast I got thrown out of the boat could've been paralyzed could've been killed the second time we just crashed into the piling of a bridge see that's when he looked at me because you got to stop hanging out with me I'm trying to kill myself you said that to me because you guys stopped hanging out with me because I'm really trying to kill myself oh okay I just smoked a cigarette bloody from the yeah that's that ain't great so he has liver cancer now walked into the doctor and went I'll do anything but I ain't stopping drinking he's just fun yeah it's fun a lot of fun and so at that point I started saying myself you know this is becoming a real boot booze and you know being a you know junk box is becoming a real problem I'm not really doing cocaine anymore but I'm just drinking I haven't done cocaine yeah what is your drink of choice at this martini a Beefeater martinis chain it's pretty much the highest proof alcohol behind the bar it's big you know it's a beast of a drink 80 proof and you drink four or five of them you get or kettle one on the rocks I always want hard liquor on the rocks or straight up marks will you like clear liquor clear liquor and that cuz the figure no and then and then and then I would do shots also on top of that I would just shots on top of it yet because I was like III don't know if you've listened to the rest of the episode I had prop yeah the you're running from some show at that point I was sitting in my office and I was really really hammered and not really hammered that day I was like hungover but I've been you know consistently drinking and I had gotten you know like you know I'd been you know it was like the foreclosure notice his kept coming and it kept coming in the bills kept coming and I'm not paying anything I'm not paying taxes I'm not paying anything I just have no money and I'm I'm closing a deal like once every three months there's just no money no money no money no money and so eventually I get a summons for jury duty and I I was I gotta go to answer this summons because I they'll put you in jail right and I got one of the red one yeah which is what you haven't answered that I just kept ignoring him ignoring him ignoring him and then I got one that basically was like you need to get your [ __ ] ass down here and then when I was never forget I went down it was a black lady behind the counter when I handed it she goes got one of those huh is that bad she's like that's Harlem but my argument was this is a summons it is not a subpoena I don't know why a summons is a suggestion that we'd like you to come to court I don't have to write but subpoenas you better have your [ __ ] ass there and she goes look you're not wrong but good luck arguing that right and then I got stuck on a five [ __ ] week drug case Oh interesting five weeks the last week of January all the way through February interested what was it like drugs it was these two gangbangers that had I mean done a drug deal in the jack-in-the-box parking lot in a Toyota [ __ ] minivan check the box by the way not good yeah and millions in cash millions in drugs automatic weapons in the washer and dryer in their apartment like it was they had phone tat everything they had it all it was I don't even know why we needed to do this for five what they did the defendants did was the old-school mafia cuz back then they would say well where you have you had to say your [ __ ] name yeah and where you lived and everybody would just say Los Angeles that give it where when why do I have to say where you need to say Encino now now you've given us a specific one to somebody and the old-school Mafia trick is for them to look at you like this and then they just write [ __ ] while you're talking they're just look and you say oh I'm Ryan Sickler I live in San Diego no and they write and stare and it intimidated the [ __ ] out of our jury and those ladies got worried and then courts open so they would have their [ __ ] gangbanger friends with face tats and everything just come and fill the seats and just stare at us time we were [ __ ] scared what happened they were so guilty I so I'm saying it was they had everything emanating in Vic yeah they got I have we had to well I you you think that's cool I had murder torture rape the ephra huh yeah I did torture Jesus yeah okay we we did it within two weeks - okay you know a five-week drug case five weeks of nope yeah you're a murderer torture we had a civil suits at the cops because this guy was a rat he was an informant jeez that's a good one they kept letting him out of jail so we could murder this chicken it was very bad at least i think he did I don't listen I didn't listen that closely but yet it weird eyes no I was so excited I tried to get jury duty as soon as I went there and heard it was murder and torture I was like I gotta get on this I need something in my life I can't afford to go to a retreat I'm sure I need this and I and and then they were like oh you know the DA the DA is like your license has been suspended don't you hate the cops I'm like no I hate myself for not being responsible she's like okay then the defense attorney was like you know they asked you to jury selection then she's like murder torture how could you be impartial and I'm like those are just words I've seen no evidence words mean nothing and I found out later I was a defense pick like the defense looked at me like he'll understand torture you know he'll get it sometimes you have a day you know I wasn't like a law-and-order pick I was like a defenseman yeah like yeah we want that guy we want that guy he's a scumbag think about what people have to think about you yeah nick is on a murder torture rape defense side they literally look at me when he's a piece of [ __ ] that guy would have done this crime he might have done this crime so that was an intense experience because you hear about mortality every [ __ ] day and at the end of that experience I was like oh I got a really get out of the job I'm in I got a sober up I shouldn't be honest come out of the closet and then I should do something I like with my life this is all a 25 years old 25 and the trial ended it was the spring of 2010 and then I went through that summer add one more summer of boozing it up and whatever softshell crabs whatever the [ __ ] I was doing and then I show in the late summer and then I started stand-up comedy I think in late August or the first week in September I can't remember I think late August and I started I did my first set in a coffeehouse tattoo parlor Long Island and it was my first set and I was in AAA and I brought some of my AAA people to watch me do my first set and at that point it was the fall of 2010 within two weeks three weeks I was driving into the city within two to three years I was living in New York City five to six years after that I had done jfl I'd done a Comedy Central special I don't want the Netflix specials I moved out to Los Angeles about I started coming out here heavily about two years ago and then I moved out here about a year ago so that started that whole journey but my life was going in this direction and then that that murder trial kind of just now I might have gotten there another way another time another place but that crystallised a lot of things in my head like [ __ ] I gotta just move on from this because otherwise you know and one of the guys in the jury was like you should try stand-up comedy I always thought I was funny I always wanted to kind of be a comedian or kind of be in that we hadn't even dabbled yet Apple had I think I did one open mic that didn't work out great in New York City before that whole thing I think I drove in once a year prior to that no I know I did I just can't I wish I could identify what mic it was but I drove into New York City I did one mic and it didn't really work I didn't really do it after that until this trial happened and it was still in like that 2008-2009 crazy mortgage time I drove into the city tried one mic and then coming into comedy 25 now having some of a comedic voice and some stories and some perspective to draw on I just hit the ground running I started doing comedy all the time and that was then it's just you know that's been the rest of my life so before from from from really 13 to 25 it was just drugs drugs and alcohol but once you hit that 25 point and you're now in comedy what is your relationship with like what is it like with your parents this point are you still seeing both of them are you still seeing both of them but he's it's it's the relationship that I think anyone has with their parents around 25 unless they're super close with them like it was fine but it was also like they were supportive of what I did but they were kind of again it's you know you go do it all you want to be a comedian great they don't know any comedians they're like I don't know anyone making a living to a nap but your mom's not in the hospital yes she is she what happened Charl 22 what happened where you finally said okay we now need to get my mother and my grandmother and aunt I tried to get her in for a long time it's very hard to get somebody into a hospital against their will be greeley even if you have doctors and yeah yeah because people can just sign themselves out of the hospital and it's very dangerous for somebody who is you know not mentally well to be able to sign themselves out of an institution and go do what they want you know so they had tried that for a long time but it's very tough because of the laws in New York State or whatever it's you know and they're I'm sure there's a good reason why it's not easy because then we just be everybody be signing everybody end up that guy but whatever it is it's very difficult and you know these things aren't cheap but I think they had to get state aid and all that so there's no mental health care in the country there it garyvee the closest thing you get to mental health inside be I have a joke about it my act like Instagram basic little hustler sir the closest thing mental healthcare is like you know it's just not really paid attention to that's why I love this show know people talk about this [ __ ] even still like guys for guys do you go to therapy have you gone I grown and I just did a big harangue on it on my last week of long as you don't like therapy here's what I think about therapy I don't I think you can waste a lot of time trying to get to the bottom of everything and I think it can be somewhat self-indulgent and I think you kinda like my grandfather for example grew up in terribly poor circumstances a lot of horrible things happened you know his brother was a drug you know but my girl father became a very successful guy and a lot of it was because he was will and it was you know Drive and it was putting his faith in things greater than himself it was very traditional religion for him but that doesn't have to be I think therapy could be very good for a lot of people but I also think it could be this weird indulgence where people don't move forward because they think I just have to keep digging and plumbing the depths of all of these things instead of just moving on accepting people for who they are accept people for being imperfect accept life is a cosmic joke to an extent accept these things to kind of move on and I think it can be very good for a lot of people but a lot of a lot of times it's just self-indulgent horseshit that a lot of people kind of you know you know it's like we do this thing self-care which is hilarious to me people like us self-care and it's like imagine visiting this country and looking around and going well I think the problems in America are because people are doing too much for each other I wish it was more of a selfish country imagine that I wish they were doing more for themselves and then self-care is never like becoming a better person it's always like masturbating with a candle or something like just I want to take more baths and it's like guys it's not about that it's we got to get away from me and self-care and it's all about me I think the greatest thing in the world is to realize that there's other people and try to like listen to them and help them or whatever you know you're not wrong yeah and I don't disagree with that right so but if you don't have your [ __ ] together I agree haven't figured yourself out [ __ ] help anybody else I like that you're a scream Oh Serapis are very stupid people I will have the ever met of that have you ever met one person that said they were getting a degree in psychology that you thought had anything I'm gonna be let's be very honest about it let's be very it's right up there with art history where you go none of you it's certain Annette it's never a guy I would rather listen to a [ __ ] old detective or I would rather talk to one of those people for an hour then somebody who couldn't hack it in anything and said I'll be a shrink well listen I don't disagree with that either - druh kidding loved room there are some shitty there yeah there are some shitty regular doctors there are some shitty everybodys and and therapy can be like dating in the in the sense that you have to find that right person for you and then the right there but all that but you know I it's even still but you I guess I'm asking you specifically because there's still a stigma and and I hear it all the time that that guys still don't go a lot of yeah don't go deuce are you do you stand by what you say because of the way you feel or as part of it also because you're a man and your ego doesn't allow you to go in there because I'm sure there is some of that but I also think that I'm lucky enough to do something I like with my life I'm lucky enough to have outlets to express myself I'm lucky enough to get to do something that's challenging and interesting that doesn't mean that it's medicine and that doesn't mean that comedy is fixing me in any way but I do feel like I feel like I'm able to kind of you know express myself and have outlets that other people don't have and I'm grateful for that I'm gonna against the idea of potentially going to therapy at a certain point I just I just don't know I I you know I don't know I think that like you can evolve as a person on on your own and you could do a lot of it on your own you can but I also want to say this therapy doesn't have to be in some office building or sitting there I'm alright my friends everything that happened to me when I was a kid I you know I'm 16 I have no parents my friend's mom became my mom and right she would sit down with me at night I mean other everybody else be out drinking whatever there be nights I sit with her and we would debate whatever was going on in the news or you know anything at the time just talk life and like what it was really like and that [ __ ] saved me yeah it was never this therapist I would go talk to you know like you said I could sit and listen to this is this show was therapeutic my the clarity I had a woman long so Howie who's one of my best friend's Mother's who told me as you do Stan it was funny we used to drink martinis together Long Island woman very funny and we used to drink martinis and you go nobody makes me laugh you make me laugh do stand-up comedy and and they were therapeutic for that was terrible I'm saying yeah and then I came back one day and I was really frustrated and I was like it's very hard socks I'm not making any money and she was it's what you're meant to do who cares if you're enjoying it it was such a great thing because sometimes what we're meant to do is not what we enjoy and she goes you just got to get back out there I keep doing it it's what you're meant to do because I see this for you you know what I mean Wow how were you then then she told me that she like been on earth for 2,000 years she was part of a cult with fairness I mean it doesn't matter she said Shirley MacLaine was a spiritual the point is this the point is this she was right I am funny and it was therapeutic and I'm I've just had some shitty therapists you know I've had ten I get that there are some picture of a tree I'm like will you will you shut up right yeah you know so I am for it but I also am wary of it only because there's a lot of hucksterism and I've spoken this at college it is a business I know for sure don't know what they're doing yeah a lot of people in this profession don't know what they're doing and he goes it's you know you know so I don't know I think there's a benefit to it but I also think maybe you just better talking to someone who's stocking shelves at a grocery store at that too you know while they're stocking shelves you start unloading on that that's oh yeah I was right there in the aisle yeah I've been doing a new thing at the end of the show and I probably should have gave you a heads up and I don't think you'll have any problem with this if you could go back to your 16 year old self and give 16 year old Tim Dylan advice and it doesn't have to be advice for when you're 16 it could be you know buy stock and Apple when you're 35 whatever what would you tell your 16 year old self with the benefit of hindsight that you have now start a YouTube channel earlier start a podcast earlier social media is gonna dominate be more attractive have more money be better your friends are all losers and your family sucks ditch them now don't waste time get thin be thin don't eating isn't that good like even though you think it is and you're gonna learn that it's the only thing you have left soon abandon it you know get out of get out of get out of you know no really here's the answer to that question here's truly the answer to that [ __ ] question nothing not one thing because you get to where you're going that's what and that is what you would say jack keep doing what you're get to where you go let it happen Oh like I don't I it's one of those questions where you're like what would my sixteen-year-old self even think if I came back to them now they'd be like what you know like who's fat pedophile get away what kind of advice are you giving me I should start it what tick tock it's like what do you say I would just you get where you're going I know brilliant people in this business that are doing arenas and they were always meant to do arenas and I know people in this business they're doing comedy clubs and selling them out and they were meant to do that and I know people in this business that wrote of a play and have a great play that no one cares about but it made them happy and they're meant to do that I just I don't know what I meant to do but I know that I really don't feel like you know what you're meant to do I know that I meant to be funny and I know that I'll keep doing that for the rest of my life but I you know I didn't know that I was meant to be sitting here in LA doing podcast I didn't know what that was five years ago right so whatever the hell I end up doing I I think it's kind of that a a [ __ ] even though I'm not like super like a prog guy all the time but like I kind of like get out of your own way like kind of like yeah that's great advice yeah I don't know how to your own way here's the way this isn't a been in my way a lot this isn't a a thing and it's gonna sound ridiculous and it's gonna sound people are gonna not understand it because it first it's like my life is none of my business in a way like my life I do the things that I think a right principled and whatever and I work as hard as I can what happens I don't control what I cannot try to manage and control every part of my life because that's when the resentments build up because things aren't exactly the way I want them to be and that's when I'll start going well how do I fix this how do I fix these resentments and it's gonna be with drinking and alcohol but if you just if you just say to yourself I don't know where the hell this is gonna go and you just hold on to that and you also hold on to your integrity to whatever degree you can I think I think you'll probably be okay when you are brother thing now coming on thank you for thank you thank you for being [ __ ] night I love you thank you so much I love you too thanks for having me man anytime yes you're always well tire will you please plug promote everything one more time Tim Dylan show which is my podcast if you want to hear more about how therapy's really helped me and it is good the Tim Dylan show on Apple podcast YouTube Spotify Tim Dylan show YouTube channel Tim Jay Dylan di llo in on Instagram and Twitter we put out some really funny videos in content and you know if you if this was fun for you then those are cool things to check out yeah definitely go check that out thank you again thank you come back whenever you best I appreciate it brother I am Ryan Sickler on all social media Ryan Sickler calm we'll talk to you all next week [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: YMH Studios

Views: 860,276

Keywords: ymh, your mom's house, your moms house, tom segura, christina pazsitzky, christina p, mommies, jeans, up, high and tight, what's with the jeans, denim on denim, podcast

Id: E-dawUo7LAk

Length: 75min 37sec (4537 seconds)

Published: Tue Jan 28 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/Ziribbit]

Dude on honeydew has a real talent of breaking it down. Should be a great listen, thanks for the heads up.

[u/[deleted]]

Saw this one - one of the best pods with Timmo!

[u/SWEAR2DOG]

Go to the first one they did before this one

[u/Curr3nSy]

the one linked is his second appearance; his first appearance was one of the first episodes of Honeydew before they got video.

if you already love Tim and haven't listened to these you will love him even more.

[u/hnirobert]

Would've loved to have heard Tim on the Crabfeast. This was still great of course.

[u/Avacados-Anonymous]

How I discovered Tim was him on the Ari podcast it was great.

[u/[deleted]]

Debatably laughs worse than Ben