- I'm a cult leader. It's called the First
Church of David Bowie. - No way! Really? How many members do you have? - I don't know, just like
four or five at this point. - Oh. (playful music) - My name's Carlos Dillard. - I'm Rain. - My name is Ellen Naquario. Oh my God. Like, not much. I'm like a drug virgin. - I'm done Molly, Ecstasy. Yeah, I smoke the fuck out of weed. I smoked before I came here. - Shrooms, LSD. I can't remember what it's called, but they told me it was like a horse tranquilizer or something. (laughs) - My mother was a drug dealer
in my house when I was a kid, which ended me into foster care. So I grew up around drug
dealers and drug addicts, pretty much the majority of my childhood. (laughing) - Hoo, ha. (laughs) Okay. - All right, come on down. - I'm Henry. - Henry? Carlos, nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you, Carlos. (laughs) Damn. What does your drug do for you? - Pleasure. Do you like having fun when you have sex? (laughs) (snorts) My drug I like to use... - Okay. - Has a lot to with sex. - Oh! - I'm kind of wondering
if you've used what I use. - Oh. - But I'm stereotyping you. - Because I'm black or gay, which one? - Gay. - You're all about that Viagra. - Ecstasy! - Oh! Poppers. - Right. - What the hell is this? - Poppers. - Poppers! - It's always in liquid form? - Mm-hmm. - And you just go, doo doo. - No, you don't drink it. - Oh. - No, no. You inhale it. - What happens to you if you do? - You can die. - That's why it says keep
out of reach of children! (laughs) How does that affect you? - It makes you easier to have sex... Well, anal sex. - Like, what, like-- - It relaxes things. - Okay.
- It relaxes your muscles. - I love poppers. I don't know why they are illegal. - They're not. - Oh, they're not? - Mm-mm, no. - But why do you have to
go to the shadiest places to buy them? Like, one of those glory hole places and it's kind of like really gross. - Buy your poppers, stick
your dick in a hole. (laughs) - Hi. - Hi, what's your name? - Mimi.
- Mimi. You have Xs on your face. That's hella creative. Like, bitch, come on. - I wouldn't be surprised
if you like huff spray paint or some crazy ass shit. (laughs) But yeah, you're good. You're fun to look at. - What would you say are your
hobbies during the weekend? - I go to drag shows. I go to parties. - So you're a partier. It sounds like-- - Oh, absolutely. - You're very active. - I love, yeah. - Okay. - The nightlife is for me. - The nightlife, you want to feel good. I would say the main two
would be cocaine and Ecstasy. - I would think DMT. - Why is that? - DMT is literally used to
open your brain, be creative. - My favorite drug is acid. - Why? - It's a way of getting
out of my head a little bit and thinking about my
surroundings and life differently. - Okay, I can see that. - 'Cause when you're on acid, it's like-- - Yeah, tell me about what it's like... I've never done acid before. - Well, I only do it every few months. I'm not like a weekly acid user. One time I threw up at the zoo on acid. (laughs) - That was good? - Yeah. - Uh... You're like a normal person. (laughs) - So when did you first do drugs? - Man, I was in seventh grade. - Seventh grade. I'm gonna lock my kids up. Seventh grade. They'll probably just
end up doing more drugs. - Probably. - Yeah, okay, never mind. - That's kinda what happened to me. I just had a rough childhood
and grew really bored. - Meth? - I like your boots. He has Doc Martens on
which are very expensive. He probably likes a higher class of drug. (laughs) Because--
- I guess, thanks. - You know, yeah, he's like
real put together, maybe. - You seem super chill, so I'd say your worst would be cocaine. - He does coke. - Tony, tell me what your drug... - Um, so I used to be
addicted to painkillers, prescription painkillers. - Oh! - Why don't you do it anymore? - It just ruined my career as-- - What was your career? - I was in the Army for six years. - See, that'd do it. - Are opiates addicting? - Yeah. - Like, chemically addicting? - Yeah. - Okay, I see. Shit. - I mean, even just talking
about it makes my mouth water. - Damn. Okay. What drug do you do? Let me guess. Like looks will tell me anything. - Common or not common? - Extremely common. - Is it social or is it
like a personal thing? - It's social in like getting
it, but once you get it-- - Then you go home-- - You like go home and lock the door. - Huh. - What's the worst reaction
that you've ever gotten from it? - They cut it with something really weird and my whole arm got these
welts and red spots all over it. - I'm gonna say heroin. - Are you addicted? - I was. - Oh, you were. Alcohol. - I was a heroin addict. - Whoa! - Yeah. - Oh, man. - Was there a spoon involved? - Oh, yeah. That's how you cook the dope so you can shoot it into your arm. My dad found me unresponsive
in my room a couple times and he revived me and... - Oh, my gosh. - After that, I told him
that I couldn't live anymore. And I decided to go to
treatment one more time, I had been about 13 times. - Oh, my god. Come here. (laughs) Wow. - And I got clean and then a
year later, I loved my life. (sighs) - Wow. - I'm so happy that you're past that. - Yeah, me too. (moans) (laughs) I feel like you need a hug more than I do. - I know, I need a hug! - Okay. (laughs) - I'm so glad you're okay! - What's your frequency of usage? - Once a week. - You're just go on a party once a week. Just whoo, let it out, and then let it go. - It's not a party. - What would you call it? - A ceremony. I'm a cult leader. It's called the First
Church of David Bowie. - No way! Really? How many members do you have? - I don't know, just like
four or five at this point. - Oh. - When you do drugs, what are you chasing? What kind of feeling are you looking for? - It's a religious experience. - Oh! He might be like a kombucha tea guy. (laughs) I'm sure it's not kombucha but like-- - Are you thinking of Ayahuasca? - Yes, that. (laughs) - DMT. - Mushrooms. - Is it LSD? I think that's what it is. - It is not LSD. - I need to do more drugs. - I can tell her? - Yeah! - I use psilocybin
mushrooms, magic mushrooms. - Oh! - I got it right! - Can you describe what it feels like? - It's kind of like stepping
into an open volcano and just getting blasted up. Like your whole body could be shaking. - Okay, I'm vibing with that. - And I get these visions
of black iron fortresses, sheets of flame, devils
dancing and everything because I am channeling
that energy and that spirit. - And you're feeling it. - You don't ever get sober
and go, that was weird. It was intense. - No, I've basically spent
the last year wondering if I was having a psychotic breakdown, but I've determined that
I probably am not, so... - Hello. - Hello, Kate. - Kate. - Yes. How's it going? - It's going, Kate. Shit.
(giggles) - Okay, let's get this rolling. - When's the last time you did it? - Um, this morning. - And what's your frequency at this point? - All day. - She looks hella normal. I think it's gonna be an internal drug. - Internal how? - Like a pill. - Oh. - Do you do Xanax? Are you the Xanax one? I had a lot of friends in
high school who did Xanax. It was like this. - What do you like to do on the weekends? - Party and I work a lot. - Is it a problem for you? - I think anything can be a problem. - Oh... Alcohol. - Coke. - Cocaine. Did I get it right? - I do do cocaine. - Okay. - But I'm actually here for weed. - Oh, shit, no way. (laughs) What are all the drugs that you've done? - Oh, my god. - Would you say? You know, list 'em off. - Um, weed, coke, accidentally
did meth, that was awful. - Accidentally did meth? - Accidentally. Crack. - So something was spiked, shit. - Mescalin, ayahuasca, ketamine, DMT. But mostly cocaine, mushrooms, and weed. - So you don't think it's a problem? - I think that sometimes the way that I do drugs is a problem. I don't think that I have a problem. - How do you do the drugs? - I do everything excessively. - Why? - To deal with a lot of
scars and emotional trauma that I can't really seem to get through. After listening to
everybody's stories today, it's like been really, really beneficial to kind of see how drugs are used, how they're perceived, and... - I can really feel your emotion. - Yeah, I'm emotional today. - I know, shit. (laughs) I could feel it. - So do you just wish you
did a little bit less? That's it? - Yeah, maybe. I wish I had more control. - Huh. You look like you're
someone in control, but... - Look good, feel good, you know? - I know, but doesn't that wear you down? - Absolutely. - Then what are you left with? (inhales) (exhales) - Um... Damn it. (laughs) You got me. (whispers) Ah. (inhales deeply) - I'm sorry. - It's okay. You did this! This is your fault. (laughs) - Well, if you ever want to
happily smoke weed with me, I would love to. Actually, that sounds like
a really nice fucking day. (laughs) It was so nice meeting you.
- You, too. - Can I have a hug?
- Of course. - Thank you so much for
sharing that with me. - Of course. - I'm much like her. I think, I just do a lot of weed and I use drugs to kinda
regulate my emotions. Sometimes it's toward the negative and you can use it towards the positive. - Um... No. Drugs seem to be more of
an escape for everybody. That seems to be the
common thing that I see. - There's some stereotypes with drugs. Like with heroin, you just
imagine losers in a way when that's not really the case. Anybody can be addicted
to any of these drugs. - I'm gonna go smoke a
blunt and call it a day. (laughs) (applause) - (laughs) Oh, my god. I'm supposed to go on a road
trip with the fucking kids. (laughs) Oh, my god.
