Get Married Young! w/ Fr. Mike Schmitz

I I have this advice now it's a bit hyperbolic but sometimes I like hyperbole cuz it ends up making a point I think these people should consider quitting College get married before they're ready move into a bubble and then have more children than they can afford and I can defend all of those premises that's great don't you think I don't know like maybe St in college but maybe not I chatted with a fellow here yesterday he might be out here he said he just got married he just got engaged good for you and he said he getting engaged in married in 2026 like that's a terrible idea you will fornicate it's a long you should quit anything and just marry her like next week what are you doing my first I think my first or second year on campus so it's 19 years ago um a freshman couple came up to me the fall fall of their freshman year and said father we're engaged can we do marriage prep with you and you marriage us marry us this summer I was like okay let's uh talk about this you know it's good that there were several months I mean you need to you need to take time to but I'm like they were freshmen they're and they dated in high school and so basically I was like okay well let me just check some boxes first like what do your your do your families know each other oh they know each other really well do they approve of this like oh yeah they actually they're on board they really like this idea like okay at least the people who are in their lives were like I don't know who you are I met you literally an hour ago right but they think it's a good idea the people who love them yep so they get married between their freshman and sophomore year of college they get pregnant their junior year of college she gets into med school the year after they graduate they went to med school they actually she was class based with my little brother because my little brother went to med school there too and yeah there they are they're the married couple with the baby who's like already two her first year of med school now they have I think maybe four or five kids and they've been married 19 or 18 years yeah and like yeah no one no one would look at that and say like that's a great idea because you're why because you're signing and here's the thing because you're signing yourself up for a lifetime of suffering and pain but pause what do you think waiting is going to do yeah it's not like that's without the cross exactly every vocation has the cross yep and no there's there's foolish crosses and there's wise crosses so I don't know if you know this about me I got fired on my birthday a month before my wedding which made me both unemployed and illegal oh really I didn't know the illegal part I KN I was illegal unemployed and I called my wife's Dad I'm like sorry so and then we got married it was awesome been very hard actually this day 18 years ago I proposed to my wife really is that cool congratulations and a bit of advice bit of advice the fellas out there you may have heard this but I called my mate Mark Bennett cuz I was having some really cold feet I'm like ah should I I asked for all these signs and I got none of them and I'm like I'm just a bit nervous and he these are his exact words over the phone to me he said are you what the freaking hell are you talking about you idiot she's better than you anyway you need to propose before she finds that out that's great that afternoon really today today 18 years ago that's amazing I'm so glad I did it there's something about though again I I especially something like this with our students with everyone here where there's there's a wisdom in making sure that the person you want to marry that you check some of those boxes right so typically uh even the secular world says the big four that you have to have agreement on the big four the big four are Faith you need to have agreement on faith family finances and intimacy issues like these are four areas where if you are going to saddle yourself with the other person and they're going to settle themselves with you you have to have some place of agreement you have to have the same worldview when it comes to Faith when it comes to family when it comes to finances when it comes to intimacy issues this is really really important if there's no red flags that's wonderful I think sometimes the image though is if we're in agreement on faith like we're United we're Catholics we're passionate about the Lord a Nothing Else Matters and B that means we're going to have a pain-free life that means we're going to have a marriage unlike my parents without all the heartache and all the suffering but the reality of course is that every vocation is a call to come follow Jesus and die in one way or another and so yes hopefully you have agreement on these four areas hopefully that you're United in faith and family and finances and intimacy but also that means so that you can weather those storms together with that Faith right it means so that um you're not necessarily alone in all those things because you're marrying a broken person and they're Mar marrying a broken person and like even mentioned like Cameron for the last 3 years and it's like amazing woman you're United so good I love her she's my best friend but it was brutal you having to carry the cross with her and that's what's going to happen I mean and a lot of the time I was just being dragged cuz I I wasn't man enough to actually walk when God was giving me the grace to walk I'd like to say I did this with such Grace I loved her well I was a A lot of the time I was not good and that's and I was frustrated I was angry I had these thoughts like I didn't sign up for this like all this stuff and then I would think that and I would realize that I thought that and I'd feel shame for that and when you're in shame you it's not like oh now I'm in a place to really love her well right so thank God for Bob shs and his good Ministry CU that helped us a great deal so so much healing that's necessary because but I think even having that that mindset of even if I make all the right choices we are going to have to pick up our cross yeah and we're going to have to pick it up together the problem is you don't know that until the cross has been thrust upon you like it's easy to nod sagely yeah and go yeah I suspect that this will happen but then it happens you're like I'm drowning like yeah that's what we meant Oh what do I do hey thank you so much for watching before you go do us a favor leave a comment let us know what you thought of the video like And subscribe

Channel: Pints With Aquinas

Views: 96,595

Keywords: aquinas, catholicism, catholic, pints with aquinas, matt fradd, theology, debate, religion, st. thomas aquinas, thomas aquinas, philosophy, women's rights, woke, feminism, feminist, pro-choice, pro-life

Id: 8Yr1EIQ2bgU

Length: 5min 41sec (341 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 17 2024