Funniest Roasts Found on Internet V5

stop saying your life is a joke it's not jokes have meaning morning of my dad's wedding i was 14 why do i look like a disgrace to you pip candidate [Music] tony hawk is the oldest teenager i've ever seen if you saw yourself getting sold on dark web and you decided to buy yourself how do you think they'd deliver you to you both of you to assume i have the money both of you to assume that you're expensive she's literally that one girl in class who bullies you then tells the teacher you hit her chicken doesn't need seasoning amazing how he resisted the temptation to devour that sign long enough for this picture to be taken given how much he loves the taste of cardboard tatty is like the kid in school that would start fights with everyone and then get their mom in the next day deadly brain eating a moba confirmed in florida poor thing gonna starve karen uses her underwear as a mask and says they told her to wear a mask because she wasn't black wearing a clean mask is easier than walking around a store having the smell of a salmon hatchery inside a porta potty pressed against your face shaquille o'neal what should i name her call it free throw so you won't ever sink it guys what's stopping you from dressing like this 24 7. i don't park cars at an italian restaurant [Music] in iowa the farmers would try to milk you please find a shirt i have eight pets oh cool what are they three dogs five cats you should get a lizard no thank you are you sure with your dry conversation he'll feel right at home she seems like the person to lick her finger before turning the page on a kindle kj apple and cole sprouse when they were actually seventeen kj apple man i would have absolutely crushed you at age 17 crushed coal sprouts you wouldn't even have survived the weight of my wallet beach they are telling you i don't want a relationship and two weeks later they are cuffed the with you is silent like the g in lasagna if they showed this movie on an airplane people would still walk out on it how are you not the a-hole here you're chaining your adult daughter for sleeping with one guy if you were any simpler your husband would have to water you twice a week this vid gives a niche at the top of my mouth only a double barrel shotgun could scratch he looks like captain america before the stem cells i have never been so visibly disrespected in all my life use your creativity for good not evil [Music] when you're basically the only person in the store not wearing a mask yes and even though miss biggie is merely a puppet made of cloth and wire mostly she still have more brains so two inch murder hornets are big but my two inches are small yeah okay one stings with pain and the other with disappointment middle of the night shreks the kind where you wake up and tangled in each other and no words are spoken caresses turn into kisses and kisses turn into passion i'd just be happy if she stops freaking snoring she's like an asthmatic yak drowning in custard i've been having trouble breathing lately and my doctor told me to get tested for this kung flu luckily i still have my oxygen tank from my cancer treatments to keep me going i don't need to hear what the liberal doctors say god will keep me healthy shouldn't she be harassing mike wazowski about his paperwork hey if your mask is working why does it matter if i wear a mask because masks are to prevent you from giving it to other people not protecting yourself from it you soggy piece of whole wheat nut loaf bread dudes shaped like an airpod any white girl that look like this will rob you and help you look for whatever she stole i'm reading all my comments today and i love you guys so much you all don't understand how much i appreciate all your support when aimbot misses and accidentally shoots your career to death not surprised rogerstone got away with it when he looks like the villain you see in the last scene escaping on a bicycle-powered plane someone tell riley we at the end wordpass isn't sure actually transmittable i'm a disappointment you're the kind of person to play the ussr ransom base boosted edition on the back of the school bus and wonder why no one thinks you're interesting that town's name is so long it's invading the netherlands introducing england's 81st test captain he's got the face of a victorian pickpocketer this man goes to the gym and does shrugs for four hours and then leaves ernie anime as lame as frick imagine freaking and you got a money you're the only youtuber i think should get a worse quality camera i hate everybody you always pose like a divorced mom [Music] this man would slap his own ass during shreks [Music] she looks like the type of person who reads all terms and condition then press decline i don't know if anyone has said this but charlie looks like he could turn water into weed 2020 has officially redeemed itself star wars reset includes kathleen kennedy stepping down too bad i don't know why that matters this beach ran the franchise into the ground harder than a pilot with no hands this what a twix look like when it's been in your pocket all day how are russian girls just the hottest people alive and why do they turn into potatoes once they reach 47. linguistic question from a non-native speaker why is it man in virginia here but florida man in other news virginia is a place florida is a derogatory adjective [Music] man looks like a rejected eminem concept what the frick man this is his mother that's scary you're like that gross watery liquid at the top of the yogurt give yourself a good stir and come back with a more positive attitude please and thank you such a great visual long [Music] it's because of this kind of people why the power rangers say their colors she probably looks down and up before crossing the street tell me which stocks to buy these nuts lmao0000 shouldn't they be dropping soon though i showed this to my therapist he walked into the next room handed the other therapist 20 and sat in the chair she looks like she's about to murder the one out of ten dentist that didn't recommend her toothpaste that first creep looks like a weasel that wished to be human but the genie was hungover so he didn't try very hard [Music] the wife looks like she would be a stripper in whoville he looks like if you microwave dylan for 25 minutes [Music] i swear charlie is the only person i've seen that can stand up and manage to look shorter a high school student has died after jumping into the tall river as a punishment for losing a rap battle even the river's flow was too strong for him this guy dead ass looks like a mechanical pencil edit my sincere apologies i didn't mean to disrespect mechanical pencils like that [Music] he gained a million dollars for every hair he lost my 16 year old son took an iq test and he scored an 87. i'm highly disappointed at him how should i punish him don't be jealous just because his iq is twice yours having you as a parent is punishment enough [Music] he looks like a higher budget more serious non-autistic version of tyler1 took a pic of my girl today if mona lisa don't get her ass back in the four horsemen of ndaq [Music] these guys could fix your wi-fi then frick your wife zuck would need an instruction manual for the second part feral looks like the final evolution of jaden smith looks like humpty dumpty went to harvard and got a degree in disappointing his parents listen here brad just because your brain runs at the speed of your foreskin growing back doesn't mean that your opinion matters in this standpoint crawfish are superior to lobsters down to their damn testicles that are somehow still larger than yours our sound card still relevant sound blaster xa5 lolli long named his son after a sound card [Music] this guy looks like if markiplier and jacksepticeye had a gay son twin sisters [Music] they both ninety percent plastic pokeman two out of ten this tweet freaking sucks and is completely unnecessary this tweet freaking sucks and is completely unnecessary if only you gave your daughter the same amount of attention you put into tearing others down on the internet you might be a decent father figure honey you need to use my tweezers to find your d oh sweetheart i'm a grown man with a beautiful wife and kids so little the insults have zero effect on me but if you'd like to send those tweezers over i'd gladly pluck a couple pupils out so you can sprinkle them on your head where your hairline used to be now kindly crawl out of my dmz freaking white walker question how do you tell the difference between brie larson and the ceiling in her house answer the ceiling has texture and more than one dimension these are the kind of people who would want a refund for m ms because they had w's on them [Music] why the first half of her arm looks like it's typed in all caps and the second half looks lower case [Music] he went for a tattoo on his neck and they charged him for a sleeve can't wait for you to visit barnsley i'll fill you in silly i'll chinese burn your neck buzzfeed this is not a drill dear men please stop wearing cargo shorts but feet shut hell up an idiot i would never vaccinate poison my kids i rather a dead child than an autistic one just don't want my children to end up scrounging benefits with one of these made-up mental illnesses i don't want weak children her actual father i'd rather a dead child than you not even my dog wanted to eat this piece of [Music] garbage only americans call football a game that is played using the hands well because when we start the game we kick the ball to the other team and they catch and run toward us to try and get to the end goal but that touches your foot once you create in a slice of rat infested bread mistakes make you stronger the person who told hitler he sucked at painting he looks like a leather couch owner admits to not cleaning her own diarrhea hotel hell the owner looks like she about to give you a poisoned apple ben shapiro the type of guy to remind the teacher to check last night's homework how much is two dollar chips it probably takes you an hour and a half to watch 60 minutes 5g is more than 10 times faster than 4g but saves 20 more energy than the industry average follow us to find out why 5g isn't just faster it's better for the planet no trials have been done on the long term effect that 5g will have to human health that's because they already know 5g and up is weapons grade don't worry it only affects brain cells so you are gonna be fine republican kelly lofla comes out against wnba's black lives matter plan her right eye came out against her left eyes plan what's the phase your significant other went through that drove you up the wall my wife went through this really weird phase where she'd dress up like herself and act like a huge freaking beach all the time [Music] why do i feel like houston's a type of guy to make eye contact through the crack in the bathroom stalls trump backs out of throwing first pitch at yank his game he's too busy dropping the ball to be able to throw it you simpering simple tongue she looks like a young punk rock version of the old man from up this dude looks so cool he's probably dating his girlfriend and her babysitter at the same time i have 12 000 games played a fortnight across three years i've died to cheetahs three times i've played warzone for four hours today i've died to cheetahs six times maybe they are not cheating and maybe you're freaking ass oh man you'd think you'd have a bigger brain with a forehead as big as yours but instead it's just filled with the extra fat that doesn't fit on the rest of your body two cannibals are eating amy schumer one of them looks to the other and says does this taste funny to you and the other says no charlie looks like a customizable character i made in skate 3. flip inside out and hand wash cold water so you don't ruin it like everything else in your life he looks like the word bra why should we care i hope your wife gives birth to a centipede and you have to spend the rest of your day slaving away to buy shoes for it luke combs makes music for people who taste the gas before they fill up their truck your videos suck lol i have spent countless hours exploring all the maps of pub g i have explored every single inch of arrangeable mirama sanhok the candy and even started to explore livik i've been in every house and every shack been in every warehouse and apartment been to the edges of all the maps but even after spending all these hours exploring and searching i still can't find who asked absolute banger of a tune but pliny looks like someone broke his lego death star in front of him i don't drink water because it doesn't taste like anything this guy has the library of babel written in braille on his head [Music] he looks like he walked in front of a school projector brashy even chose him over this hunk [Music] i'm sorry but he looks like john smith if you microwaved him for like two and a half minutes i can't even [Music] her lips look like the nickelodeon splat her lips have so much silicon you can build an i7 8 core they used him as an air raid detection system in world war ii because he could hear the planes coming flying from germany he's the type of guy to touch fire to see how hot it is he's the type of guy who would stand under the sun to dry his sweat prince philip looks several decades younger in latest snaps he doesn't look a day over iga mortis swim short when i jump in the pool swim short when i get out of the pool pp it's showtime who brings a microscope to the swimming pool he's got that tom and jerry she's on his head does your boyfriend have a nice d assurably nicer than whatever limp pen noodle you probably have homeboy looks like voldemort's gay cousin may your earlobes turn two a-holes and she's on your shoulders william finnegan barbarian days a surfing life florida man defeats grim reaper when you live in florida you live in two states one is florida and the other one is constant fear a tick tocker drank one bottle nutmeg spice this is what happened to his brain this is fake everyone knows tick tockers don't have a brain wow beautiful wedding photo based on her trigger discipline it looks like she is the little sibling who gets the broken controller so they feel like they are playing too scott wiener was the kid who used the urinal with his pants all the way down chainsmokers concert in the hamptons under investigation after video shows packed crowds this headline would also make sense if it never happened [Music] this should be in a birth control ad me for one night or one thousand dollars from trump if i drew an h on your forehead maybe kobe could have landed his helicopter got this as an ad all that money on the setup leaves no money for visits to an orthodontist [Music] carson looks like the character who gets his lips sucked by the machine on monsters inc man white y'all make us study science for 12 years in school just later tell us it's not even real i was grounded over some of those grades in school they told us we could be anything we wanted i just didn't think that so many people would want to be friggtards youtube terminates the massive and super creepy kids channel toy freaks one of the few things youtube got right youtube management decisions are like a dvd screen saver and every time they hit a corner they make a good decision amy schumer wore red lipstick for the first time and it was amazing she kisses someone and they get a paper cut a skilled surgeon could bring 90 of those burgers back to life i don't get anything that isn't sealed but i still worry cause this dude looks like he sucks on the cucumbers let's be honest he's not sucking cucumbers he sucks on sticks of butter i was worried when i started reading this comment but you ended it well [Music] his ears look like a rock climbing wall my man could eat an apple through a letterbox i wish i was as strong as this kid's mom imagine spending nine months constipated and finally pushing out this piece of shoes pyro in this video looks like a 15 year old sleep-deprived drug dealer woman gets abused he's a monster man gets abused well somehow he deserves it people like that need to tap dance on a bear trap your wife is the type of person who'd ask their biological dad if he's a virgin you look like you add please to the end of your google search you look like handsome squidward i really wanna date someone who's cuter than me but sadly i'm the cutest is more cute than you [Music] you must come up with a one question quiz that everyone in the world must answer if they are correct they live but if they're wrong they don't what would you question or answers be and why would you have shreks with me you just killed humanity [Music] his eyes looked like hamburgers y'all got fancy three monitor setups led lights three thousand dollar pieces and zero beaches lmf 800 i don't really like women i can fix pc issues in five minutes but fixing women issues takes me five years she's the type of person to cancel a doctor's appointment because she is sick he's trying far too hard to be edgy he is a pizza cutter a legend no point [Music] it looks like a rejected character from thomas the tank engine here is a picture of my ugly face because apparently it doesn't matter what you post in this sub i played you in skyrim she looks like if vin diesel and ariana grande had a baby [Music] that guy's voice sounds like my voice 14 years ago and i'm 13. she looks like a sponsor from the hunger games like the video and subscribe right now and watch my previous tank memes videos [Music] thanks

Channel: Clumsy

Views: 1,882,899

Rating: 4.9299855 out of 5

Keywords: memes, dank doodle memes, best memes, dank memes, memes compilation, dank memes compilation, best memes compilation, clean memes, ddm, tik tok memes, memes clean, reddit memes, pewdiepie memes, family friendly memes, internet roasts, roasts, internet

Id: sNnAjcegqeg

Length: 21min 26sec (1286 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 07 2020