Funniest Clinic Duties | House M.D.

[Music] you have some vaginal tearing sign of bruising no indication of trauma forced entry Ramona is you naughty girl got yourself an 18 year old boyfriend or an 80 year old with some little blue pills Myron thought he'd just try him out lucky you I guess you preferred if Myron was a little group here maybe a little we used to hold hands or read together or watch jeopardy I haven't seen jeopardy in almost a month let me talk to him about this you tried talking a 73 year-old out of sex with all these male enhancements the pressure to put outs incredible it's worse than high school he doesn't get what he wants for me he'll get it from Connie in the corner condo she's dying her hair red major league [ __ ] prescription for vaginal estrogen suppositories it'll help with the lubrication thank you maybe you could give Myron a prescription something weaker than he's got now tell him it's better for his heart he'd buy that you can't tell him the truth so you want me to lie to him would you close your legs I love cows any particular variety currencies Holsteins which is black and white ones I pass a farm on my way to school and they're so beautiful there's so majestic I dream about them leather shoes hamburgers how could anybody do that to a cow make love not balance beautiful I haven't actually relaxed doctor's deal with all the time I'm gonna write you the name of the drug you don't need a prescription it looks just like dipper Rivera but does it do the same thing oh god no sorts of nasty side effects it's real medicine completely fooled let me guess inflammatory bowel Wow yeah is it that bad yes it's also written on your chart bloody diarrhea gas pain took sulfasalazine but it didn't work then then IX tried steroid Emma's oral corticosteroids five si six my captive Puri impressed by my medical history by how well your last doctor charted it's one thing to have to go to the bathroom every hour but when the kids sit on my lap the store sent me home they're gonna fire me can't you put me back on five ay si maybe it'll work this time not likely can't be your prescription it's cheap which is good who's your insurance company won't pay for it Kojo rious cigarettes one twice a day and we're no less studies have shown that cigarette smoking is one of the most effective ways to control inflammatory bowel plus it's been well established that you look 30% cooler are you kidding me about the looking cooler yeah the rest is true isn't it addictive and dangerous pretty much all the drugs I prescribe are addictive and dangerous the only difference for this one is it's completely legal sore throat what's that lupus well everyone can operate his zipper of the up and down what comes next my new girlfriend never been with a guy who wasn't circumcised so she freaked and aha things you wanted reef gotta feel all at the would clicked I get it it's a shot dot oh I got some box cutters and just like Abraham did it i sterilize them which I was told used to stop talking I'm gonna get a plastic surgeon in the Twinkie back at the revver beautiful thank you it's dry who cares it's beautiful my lawn weren't half as well maintained as that pigeons wouldn't have the nerve to poop on it good grooming is important it's not a shot people do judge you on your appearance when you entered I noted your shirt hadn't been pressed you hadn't shaved in quite some time I extrapolated you are a person for whom detail was not a major concern I was worried you might apply that same standard in jury use toenail clippers up there they're longer so they allow me to better reach the upper hairs I'm wearing a rumpled shirt and forgot to brush my hair this week you've got athlete's foot in your nose I'm ready to be judged okay $50 to any patient who is willing to leave here right now the top of my head's killing me hmm we spent a week doing top of head in anatomy I know just where it is wow that was not the top of my head close enough for clinic your sinuses are clogged judging by the scratches on your hands I'm guessing a new cat yeah it was my mother's she's dead you keep a dead cat no my mother's dead oh poor cat you're allergic we can control it with a histamine one pill a day pills you don't like to swallow not surprised forget the pills I'll give you a nasal spray steroids is there something else you can give me well if you live by the river I got a bag it's really bad especially at night it's like my heart is on fire like it's I don't know like God hurting exactly mm-hmm it's almost like heartburn so can you give me something like its thesaurus what I take it you never mentioned this during any of your prenatal visits prenatal I'm not pregnant sorry you don't get to make that call unless you have a stethoscope Union rules I know when I'm pregnant all right I have six kids that's why my husband had a vasectomy and we use condoms vasectomies can reverse themselves condoms break okay this is what a woman is supposed to look like okay we're not just skin and bones we have flesh we have curves you have little people inside you okay okay I'm sorry SMS have just been brainwashed by the media and all those years of medical training damn right well if I could find some antacids while the nurse gets some blood blood why the heartburn I've got to make sure it's done spreading [Music] [Music] [Music] you

Channel: House M.D.

Views: 6,491,602

Keywords: Gregory House, House M.D., Dr House, House, Hugh Laurie, House Funniest Moments, House Best Moments, Allison Cameron, Olivia Wilde, Lisa Cuddy, Wilson, Best Of House, Thirteen, Foreman, Chase, clinic duty, house clinic duty, house md clinic duty, house md cows, house md circumcision, house md clinic duties, house md clinic circumcision, house md sexomnia, house md best clinic duties

Id: qifqa9-bH3w

Length: 8min 15sec (495 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 18 2017