Finding Someone to Marry

we have a mission God whoa we have risen just as long as you want go image for the stars the power to conquer here that you're right shining sunroom what is costing today the topic finding someone to marry finding someone to marry and I almost take an interesting approach today because there's something the perspective way dimension or an approach that the Holy Spirit has inspired in my heart in proverbs 24 and verse 3 the Bible says through wisdom a house is built so what you use to build a house or to build a home or to build a business really is wisdom many people think it's money that they need many would think money is their greatest need money is important but I'll tell you this when you have the wisdom you also get the money but really it's wisdom that we need and wisdom is a function of maturity wisdom is a function of maturity so this is the thought that God inspired into my heart today that if you want to find the right mate you need to first of all become the right mate to find the right mate you need to become the right mate all of us human beings are magnets even magnet and you don't attract what you want in life you attract who you are as a man thinketh in his heart so is he you don't attract what you want your tract who you are so it all begins with vision there's a game that I like to play I read it in a book many years ago tried it and was an exciting experience a day in my life five years from now is it because marriage the is something that you go into for the future your decision today concerning who to marry is going to impact your life 10 20 30 40 50 years from now okay so it's about the future vision and that capacity to see the future before it happens is a function of wisdom which is a function of maturity okay the more accurately you can decipher the future the more accurate your decisions will be today if in your vision of the future you see yourself becoming a CEO that vision will help you to recognize the opportunities for becoming one we're happy to recognize the people that will help you to become one okay vision is the key to provision is it that's money everywhere money flowing around us but most people don't know because they can't see it if your mind is filled with poverty you will not recognize the opportunities for prosperity you will only identify with opportunities for poverty if your mind is filled with prosperity Europe you recognize the opportunities for prosperity so it all begins with you as a person and your vision of the future so this game which I play I write out what the date would be exactly five years from now and then I describe how I would wake up what the room would look like okay what my wife would look like what our children will look like when I get out of the house of course what the house would look like the kind of car I would drive to work what walk or office would look like and so on it's a fantastic thing to do because the best time to shapen or control tomorrow it is while it is still in fluid state and you can do that in your imagination today was set yesterday in our imaginations or in some people's imaginations because if you don't have a dream of the future for yourself you will have to leave somebody else's dream or vision okay so you have that vision of your future and that vision is what will define that kind of a person you should mark but then the kind of a person you should marry in that vision will depend on the kind of a person you are going to be okay the kind of a person you are going to be will determine the kind of a person you should marry now you have to define the future first it's interesting how many people never think beyond today so that you see someone he looks handsome she looks beautiful oh he has a good job he has a good job when he have a good job oh he has a fine car he's very comfortable with he becomes the web back in about 10 20 30 40 years of your life okay so that's why I'm saying you need to know who you are now you need to know who you are going to be then and then that can influence the kind of a person that you need to mark when you look at that picture of your future the most important factor in that picture is you you in that picture is the magnet that will attract everything else that you see in that picture every human being is a magnet so who you are going to become will determine the kind of people you attract if that vision will ever be fulfilled my encouragement to you become the person in the vision if in the vision you see yourself becoming a CEO of course everything else will adjust to that standard the kind of a house you will live in the drive at the task you will drive the kind of relationships you will have the people who will be your friends will all be defined by who you are in the picture so if you want to attract every thin as that is in that picture you have to first of all grow to the sides of that vision and that brings us back to this issue of you becoming the right mate first maturity wisdom now talking about maturity I want to use Luke chapter 2 verse 52 as a template because it described how Jesus matured Luke chapter 2 verse 52 it says and Jesus increased in wisdom and stature and was in favor with God and men four dimensions to his life where Jesus grew and experienced development one he grew in wisdom that talks about his mental development okay he got training he developed his sense of judgment he developed his thinking he developed he acquired skills and Jesus did he was at a Penta his dad was a carpenter his that groomed him trained him and he became a carpenter mark chapter 6 verse 3 says that people looked at Jesus and said is this not death kapenta and when isaac happened i don't you think that i'm talking about a furniture maker the greek word translated happened today's Tecton which implies more of a project manager because a woodworker in the days of Jesus would go into the forest fell the trees carried them or pull them into the city put them and use them either to construct furniture or to build houses there was more of a project manager so Jesus developed skill developed expertise so he grew in wisdom he grew in stature that means he grew physically he was in favor with God talks about his spiritual development he grew spiritually in my chart spiritually I mean to the extent that God the Father said this is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased and then he was in favor with men talks about his social development his emotional development is ability to relate with other people so my challenge today is this if you want to attract or to recognize the right kind of a person for you to marry you need to grow you need to match or you need to become that kind of a person that will I attract the ideal kind of person in first Corinthians 13 verse 11 Paul the Apostle said when I was a child I spoke as a child I understood as a child I thought as a child he said but when I became a man I put away childish things that's maturity in Galatians chapter 4 paul the apostle spoke about someone who got a great inheritance but did not have the capacity to manage it because of immaturity galatians 4 verses 1 and 2 now i say that the hair as long as is a child does not differ at all from a slave though he is master of all i want to say this to you everything that you need to fulfill your destiny is already provided i'm the person you are going to marry it's alive already because I'm speaking to my Shore people it's not your prayer and your fasting now that we first got to remember that you actually need somebody to marry and then now he will create the person and put the person in his or mother's womb and then you will wait 20 to 25 years before you marry your husband is around your wife is around we only need recognition am i right God will never position beyond your reach what is yours the person is around Alleluia okay so he says he is master of all but as long as he is a child is not different from a slave he would be begging for what is his his thinking is not correcting not to manage the resources that have been provided for him so how do we solve this problem verse 2 what is on the Guardians and stee words until the time appointed by the father trailing development growth so my encouragement today okay is for you to become a good husband material good wife material and for you to be able to attract the person who will best suit the fulfillment of God's plan and purpose for your life you need to grow spiritually let's start from spiritual growth how do we know when you have grown spiritually number one you develop the ability to hear from God number two you put absolute trust in God number three you obey God hearing from God now the more you hear from God the more you grow spiritually the more you grow spiritually the more you develop the ability to hear from God Jesus said man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of the Lord okay so the wave physical food grows your physical body is the way Revelation grows your spirit when you hear from God it helps you to mature spiritually the more you mature spiritually the more accurately you can hear from God hearing from God trusting God because when you hear from God it but faith in your heart Romans 10:17 it comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God and when you put your trust absolutely in God you obey God even at the risk of your life you realize that's the only definition of success for you you obey God so you've got to grow spiritually develop the capacity to hear from God number two you've got to grow mentally marriage is not for boys and girls it's for men and women so it's obvious even in terms of physiology a twelve-year-old child should be getting pregnant and giving birth to babies because the body is not strong enough for that assignment so there is need for physical maturity very important next emotional maturity social maturity we call it emotional intelligence the ability to relate with other people got to develop the ability to love people genuinely to accept you for who they are you've got to sharpen your communication skills because marriage is 85% communication if something goes wrong with your communication something goes wrong with the marriage have you developed tax proverbs 15:1 says the soft answer turns away wrath grievious was there of anger attacked is your ability to know and feel how somebody will feel after you would have said what you want to say you've not said it but you can already predict how the person will feel after we would have said it that informs how you say there's a right thing to say there is a right way to say and as a right time to say it that's why Solomon said a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold and pictures of silver they say what that is feet but when we don't have it right in communication we create problems we run into problems in our relationships and if you're the one who is busy picking problems with everybody around you they are not the ones with a problem you are we need to match your social and emotionally okay so we have spiritual growth mental growth emotional growth physical and majority in the process of doing all that we become the kind of a person that will attract ideal versus the key factor here is vision vision you pray this is not about you controlling of what your future will look like you pray you get a sensing from God of your purpose in life and what your future looks looks like it makes it easier for you to identify your husband or to identify your wife I'm telling you recognizing your husband or wife is beyond an activity of your physical eyes your spiritual eyes you know the challenge I see a whole lot of the time with young people is they are looking for the ideal man they are looking for the ideal woman you know what your ideal husband is already married your ideal wife so ready married as well as some people fall in love with married people I'm they're not married yet but they fall in love with married people you know cuz oh he's such a nice man oh such an ideal man he has a good job he has money he has this is so nice he's so kind wonderful you know a lot of the time this guy who looks perfect or this lady who looks Buffett was not like that when he or she got married if in your vision your husband is the CEO can you recognize him when he is not yet a CEO that's what I'm talking about that's what I'm talking about you know when Passyunk and i married we were not the way we are now hallelujah it has taken investment and you know this is why I have an issue with guys who are always almost torn in bachelorhood into an institution what's the big deal and lots of you around town who are not getting married because they want to be able to get a mansion you know and to have some money and to have some cast ah how can you marry a girl when you are not yet set I mean financially you know you already have a job and they're waiting to have an ideal financial situation and I'm telling you if you're in the situation you've been deceived what a lady needs is not a perfect man in the present distant is about 10 20 30 40 years time what he needs is a man who has a vision who can define exactly where he is going on who is going to be that is what defines the kind of a wife issue Mary when pastor Nick and I got engaged if I was after we were 14 to be married that we now discussed our salaries and I discovered that her allowance as a youth copper was more than my salary as a pastor and the day I told her my salary I quickly told her you know what it's not going to be like that forever I am going somewhere I described the future for her and told her you know what if I even though we will help each other at the beginning but there's coming a time when I will ask you to keep your salary keep your pay I'll bear the responsibility for this family fully that's the essence of leadership you have a vision and you have the capacity to communicate it you should be able to sell your vision to relate listen lady if all of your assessment about the man what we are looking for is who the person is today you will soon be deceived because the fact that he has a car now is no guarantee we'll have a kind five years time maverick is likely listen making a choice for marriage is largely a matter of intuition some people all they think about is the wedding day one day they invest all their thoughts or their energy or their preparation one day the wedding they are my wedding hmm the gown will come from Singapore if ah okay so on the wedding day then the pastor says say after me and then you say I D so after that what next that's what saluting him okay that's honeymoon that supposed to do on the moon after actually do honeymoon two weeks or three weeks of August and then after that so what next nothing no idea because all the way thinking about was a web somebody gave us a book when we were preparing to get Mario titled after every wedding comes a marriage so that we should prepare more for the marriage than the wedding okay so that's the point who is this person going to be and I'll tell you this the reason why you're becoming mature is critical your spiritual maturity is D keeping your greatest asset in finding someone to marry is your ability to hear from God nobody can accurately predict your future or guarantee what if you turn out to be 20 30 years from now except God no body no body can predict the future except God you need to grow spiritually and develop the ability to hear from God you need to take time to pray take time to pray catch a vision of your future and then you can marry someone who aligns with our future now once your vision of the future is defined your values will be defined your values are the things that are very important to you if you value spirituality the fear of God you've got to marry someone who also values spirituality or else you're going to crack that home up right from the foundation if you value honesty the person's also got to value honesty if you value family you need to marry somebody who values family your values need to align your basic values you may have a few differences but your basic values your foundational values your core values need to align that's why you need to grow and mature because when you are not yet much what your values are not yet defined let me read for you proverbs 31 proverbs 31 a story of a woman who was preparing her son for the future and it touched on his marriage remember you don't attract what you want you attract who you are proverbs 31 it says the words of King Lemuel the utterance which is mother taught him what my son and what some of my womb and what some of my vows do not give your strength to women no your way to that which destroys kings you see that she's telling her son you are Palace material look into your future so on you are becoming the king now that should define how you live your life define your principles define your value you can't go around sleeping with gals they will spoil your reputation that will spoil your reputation by the time you become a king you'll be trying to manage your reputation driving people here and they are not to talk to the press or the media so on you are becoming the king then she went on in verse 4 it is not for Kings all them well it is not for Kings to drink wine nor for Prince's intoxicating drink less they drink and forget the law and have at the justice of all the afflicted give strong drink to him who is perishing and wine to those who a bit of heart let him drink and forget his poverty and remember his misery no more son you can't play around with alcohol you can't play around with drugs had drugs says in verse eight open your mouth for the speechless in the cost of all who are appointed to die open your mouth George righteously and plead the cause of the poor needy because that's the essence of leadership it's empowering the powerless standing up for the helpless in fact it's like if she was to advise him to study any cost he might say look study law she was preparing him for the future but while doing that see how it continues in verse ten son as you prepare that you need also to prepare for who tomorrow who can find a virtuous wife for her work is far above rubies if you are kingship material or Palace material you need to marry somebody who is Palace material who asked the qualities of a queen that's what you want to describe once your future is defined who to marry will be defined its know everyone that is husband material for you not every woman is wife material for you if as a woman you are queen material your husband has got to be king material so it will make it easy for you to make decision there are guys who cut there are loafers we can't hang around okay because your future is defined you've discovered your purpose it helps so verse 13 he said charm is deceitful and beauty is passing but a woman who fears the Lord he shall be praised don't use natural phenomena circumstances to decide on who to marry you may make a big mistake things are not going to remain the way they are now if anybody looked at me with my few shades and trousers okay and the white pair of shoes no car and I twisted the person and the person refused it was the passenger loss because the person didn't of heights there are powerful guys in this charge there are guys who are going somewhere and you need open eyes to recognize them what you are looking for the ants outside you already have in their hearts because they discovered their vision there are powerful ladies in this church you know this woman said jingle my charm is deceitful beauty is passive don't look at this the way they are now you may look at the lady and look at how you know she's miss your hometown now okay was she going to be like 10 years from now where she's pregnant what with our attitude be when she has children to take care of what kind of a person is he going to be like that's why some people long many years after they've married be married and now the various promotional they want to divorce the person they mark now because this person now does Institute my position as the new Federal Minister for industries so you didn't see that before okay and there are little questions people ask maybe a guy is asking what if the lady is older than I I don't know if there is any portion of scripture that insists that the mom was always beholder the only thing is you are very careful if there is a wide disparity disparity in the age you may be in two different generations it may affect your understanding and perspective to life okay I profess I in the name of Jesus that today marks the end of delay these day marked the end of delay in somebody's life i prophesy miracles of divine connection in the mighty name of Jesus God will give you peace it will give you love your marriage it will give you joy in the name of Jesus Christ

Channel: SAMRACK

Views: 484,615

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Id: N4E4e6AdLY8

Length: 29min 32sec (1772 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 04 2012