Fantastic Beasts: Destroying A Legacy

fridge [Music] guys we need to talk I'm sad today okay I'm really sad sadly space ninja why might you ask fair question I'll answer first of all I'm out of Nutella so so that sucks but also I'm sad today because today I watch Fantastic Beasts 3 the secrets of Dumbledore and now I just want to cry if you're familiar with my Channel or more specifically if you follow me on Instagram which by the way follow me on Instagram I'm a terrible YouTuber I never advertise my social media you probably know that I am a huge Harry Potter fan but I mean huge I love Harry Potter I grew up with this [ __ ] it completely Matrix my brain when I was a kid generally the reason why I love film and television the reason why I'm so incredibly passionate about it is because my mother took me to the opening night of the first Harry Potter movie on November 16 2001 I had just turned seven years old and this movie blew my mind and it literally changed my life forever it's the first movie that made me fall in love not only with Cinema but with the craft of filmmaking and writing this movie is also the reason why I enjoy reading books I hated reading as a kid and after seeing this movie I wanted more of this story and these characters so I picked up the novels this movie is the reason why I love talking about Stories the reason why I make music today thank you John Williams and it's the reason why I am making movies today but that's something we'll talk about in 2023 the point is after November 16 2001 I lived Harry Potter I bled Harry Potter I ate Harry Potter wait no that came out wrong I even have a Deathly Hallow statue because I'm a [ __ ] nerd and I'm basic you get it Harry Potter is my [ __ ] I [ __ ] love it she's made it a little difficult to enjoy it lately but we don't need to talk about her that's not why I'm here the reason I'm saying all of this is simply because I want you guys to know and understand that I do not enjoy having to say all the things I'm about to say the Harry Potter franchise means a lot to me and don't get me wrong Harry Potter was always flawed it has plot holes a few inconsistencies that become hard to ignore with time and if you don't mean you know that I find it very important to be able to criticize the things you love so I get it but overall I think Harry Potter even with its flaws is timeless but today I need to address what followed the initial Harry Potter Saga on the big screen because says damn how the mighty have fallen I'll explain everything but first I want to take a quick moment to thank today's sponsor Bessie do you guys know about vesi no you don't all right it's okay I gotcha don't worry vesi is a super Innovative company that makes shoes that are a hundred percent waterproof yeah I know it sounds fake but I promise you they're the real deal messy shoes are these comfortable breathable and stylish sneakers that are made of diamond attacks a dual climate knit material that keeps you cool in the summer and warm in Colder Weather and that most of all is waterproof and honestly it's kind of amazing see lately I've been meaning to start running again but it's kind of tricky to do that in October because I live in Canada and it's excessively rainy during the fall here but Vesti knows that because they're from Canada and they offer the perfect solution because now I can just go on my run and never have to deal with the universal nightmare of having wet sauce sucks I'm protected and most of all I'm cozy look look it can't get wet it can you're in luck because the homies over at vesi are hooking you guys up yeah they're just cool like that if you go and click the link in my description and use the code FS Ninja at checkout you will get 25 off each pair of adult vessi shoes but all of that is in my description so make sure to go and check them out thank you so much to Vesti for sponsoring this video you guys are the best and let's get back to the video so the original Harry Potter Saga ended with the release of Deathly Hallows part 2 on July 15 2011. Yes you heard that right Harry Potter ended 11 years ago do you feel old yet after that though the question for fans of the franchise became what's next because see at the time it really looked like this was the end of the franchise as a whole there were no new books at all no spin-offs announced it didn't seem like anything was in the works and as fans we dreamed we dreamed of a beautiful new story maybe a sequel maybe a prequel maybe a story with new characters taking place in another country maybe the children of Harry Ron and Hermione would grow up and go on their own Adventures maybe you would get a movie trilogy about the four Founders and their Fallout with Salazar Slytherin maybe Neville Longbottom would finally be the hero of a crazy adventure maybe Luna Lovegood but instead of all that a few years later it was announced that a prequel to Harry Potter was in development at Warner Brothers a brand new movie about newt scamander the the guy who wrote a book for kids a book about magical creatures in fact it was also announced that this movie would be titled after the fictional kids book Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them and as a response to that announcement the entirety of the Harry Potter fanbase banded together in unison to scream a gigantic huh what yeah the confusion was real especially because they announced that Fantastic Beasts was going to be a five film series over the course of roughly 10 years and not a single person on this planet understood what story could be told about newt's Commander throughout five movies the general assumption given the title was that it would be a kind of Indiana jones-like Adventure film but with magical creatures and nobody really knew what to make of that but people waited patiently to see until the movie came out in 2016 and now it's six years later and oh boy from the jump as it stands the Fantastic Beasts franchise has absolutely nothing going for it and even that feels like an understatement I'm not even kidding I think it wouldn't be a stretch to say that fantastic Beast is currently the most problematic franchise in Hollywood because somehow the people involved in this Saga are plagued with public controversies JK Rowling obviously is the writer of all three of these films as well as the author of Harry Potter but um you know let's just say she is no longer the world's favorite billionaire Johnny Depp was kicked out of the franchise by Warner Brothers in the midst of the whole Amber Heard situation and if that's not enough Fantastic Beasts also has a pivotal character played by none other Than Ezra Miller do I even need to explain that one and all of that is only made worse by the fact that even without all the controversies these movies just aren't really good and it could stop there but the issues with these movies go way deeper than you'd think okay I'll explain let's just break down the movies together all right let's go Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them at the time this movie came out it had been five years since the end of the Harry Potter Saga on the big screen so even if I didn't really know what to expect from it I was still incredibly excited to see it if anything for the cast alone Eddie Redmayne was a great casting choice for the lead it was just coming off of The Theory of Everything the Danish girl and well Jupiter Ascending but we just we just pretend this one doesn't exist Colin Farrell who is a massive win to any production that adds him Ezra Miller back when people respected them Catherine Waterson who was maybe not as famous but was fantastic and alien Covenant even if I didn't like the movie that much Samantha Morton from Minority Report like this movie was [ __ ] stacked with great actors I was really excited and so was the rest of the fan base so we patiently waited for the release date of November 18 2016. and then the movie came out and it was fine I'm not even sure if this is an unpopular opinion or whatever but Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them was a bit of an underwhelming experience for me when I watched it in theaters honestly because my expectations were admittedly pretty high I wasn't too on board with the idea of a prequel but it seemed to be disconnected enough from the story of the original Saga that I was fine with revisiting the pass for this one that said though while I was underwhelmed by the movie I didn't hate it like I said it was fine I think Fantastic Beasts one is just sort of okay there's a lot to criticize about it but I enjoy some aspects of it Newt scamander is a decent protagonist for this movie specifically and Eddie Redmayne is unsurprisingly really good in this role Colin Farrell is also incredible as Percival Graves who this secretly gathered Grindelwald and he's a genuinely threatening antagonist and in my opinion he should have kept playing Grindelwald in the following movies please anyways not too much to say about this one overall it's not the best story in the world it's quite forgettable all things considered and it has a number of issues but as a fun little Adventure in the Harry Potter World it works well enough it's completely harmless but that's the thing though it should have only been a fun little Adventure in the Harry Potter World and nothing more than that Fantastic Beasts one should have been a standalone film that would have completed newt's Arc and then this Grindelwald Saga should have been a separate franchise under a different name that would have carried over from the events of Fantastic Beasts or better yet a separate franchise That Never Comes to exist because yeah all things considered this movie is just there and it's fine the real problems come in the second movie Fantastic Beasts the crimes of Grindelwald as a society we approach crimes through statistics going up going down this movie was without the shadow of a doubt the biggest letdown in the history of this franchise I'm not gonna dwell on it too much because literally the entire internet has talked about how bad it is and I feel like it would be redundant everybody knows this movie is terrible but I will point out a couple things here and it's all encapsulated into one question and that question is why the [ __ ] is Newt the main character of this franchise everything about this story screams that it should be a franchise about young Dumbledore not newt's Commander Newt is probably the most out of place protagonist I've ever seen in a movie it doesn't make sense for him to be the main character of this story it's as if the whole story of Harry Potter played out the exact same way but instead of Harry being the protagonist it was Cho Chang a character that has nothing to do with this conflict who vaguely knows the main character and participated in a couple of plot points during which she mainly stood in the background silently and did absolutely nothing this is newt's energy in these movies during the most important moments in the entire film he's just standing there because the story and the conflicts that need to be resolved concern literally every character except for him every single storyline in the film is about other people the story of leader Lestrange and comma has nothing to do with nude The Dumbledore vs Grindelwald conflict this entire franchise is about has nothing to do with new the Queenie and Jacob storyline has nothing to do with new the Credence and nagini storyline has nothing to do with new the whole time Newt is just a tree he doesn't even want to be in the story but everyone around him is forcing him to be they're telling him he needs to pick a side and get [ __ ] done everybody is treating Newt like he is the answer to every problem in the Wizarding World but it makes no sense he just wants to take care of his pets why is everybody treating him like he's the most important individual to carry a Wizard World War anyways I needed to bring up this issue first because it's gonna be instrumental in talking about the next movie but long story short crimes of Grindelwald as everybody knows was a complete destruction of the Harry Potter universe and Mythos completely dismisses important rules of the universe it forgets about important details of the universe and it feels like everything happening in the story is a massive plot hole that should not be able to even happen due to previously established lore let me give you a few examples to explain what I mean this movie confirms that Minerva McGonagall was already teaching at Hogwarts in the 1910s which is not possible because Minerva McGonagall was born on October 4th 1935. this movie also shows us Newt using the Akio charm on a living being which according to JK Rowling herself is impossible the Akio charm only works on inanimate objects but that's not all crimes of Grindelwald also changes the nature of the obliviate curse in the Harry Potter Saga it's very simple the obliviate curse erases your memories plain and simple can't get him back they're gone it's a very straightforward spell it's it's not comp complicated however in this movie it's explained that the obliviate curse only erases a bad memory and so you can reverse the spell if you only have positive memories of the events that were erased which what that drastically changes the Canon of the entire universe it makes no sense all of that to retcon is seen and force a character back in the story he doesn't have a place in and if we're gonna go into even more details this movie also teaches us that alpis Dumbledore was the defense against the dark arts teacher of Hogwarts before he became Headmaster in 1971 but that's also impossible not only because Dumbledore was canonically a Transfiguration teacher at Hogwarts but also because we know this movie takes place in the year 1927 so roughly about a year after the birth of Tom Riddle AKA Voldemort yeah fun fact when Voldemort dies at the end of Harry Potter he's only 71 years old which is incredibly young for a wizard whose ultimate goal was to make himself Immortal the reason why it's important is because we learn in book six that right after graduating from Hogwarts in 45 Tom Riddle asked Armando dipit the previous Headmaster of Hogwarts the position as defense against the dark arts teacher we learned that Tom came to ask for the position after the retirement of the previous teacher who held the position for 50 years 50 years so explain to me how Albus Dumbledore was teaching defense against the dark arts in the 1910s all the way through 1971 when he became Headmaster make it make sense please also this one isn't really a plot hole but I just think it's really funny that Dumbledore looks like this in 1927 but in 1943 just 16 years later he looks like that and damn time has been rough on Albus man so I'm guessing you understand what I mean now but the most egregious head scratcher of this entire movie is literally its most important plot point the very piece of story that sets up the rest of the franchise ah let me explain basically this movie ends with a revelation that Albus Dumbledore and Gallard Grindelwald made a magical blood pack years ago that makes it impossible for them to fight each other they literally cannot even think about hurting each other if they try to fight they will both die instantly so the whole point of the franchise now is that Dumbledore is the only wizard alive who is powerful enough to take on Gallard Grindelwald in a fight and defeat him so he needs to find a way to destroy the blood pack and undo it so that he can fight Grindelwald and take him down once and for all it is literally the point of this entire story story everything happening in Fantastic Beasts leads up to the final confrontation between the two dumbledees and grindelwees made a magical pack that makes it physically impossible for them to harm each other and we gotta figure out how to undo that okay now listen carefully for the quick backstory when they were young Albus and Grindelwald were in love and they had dreams to live together and become the most powerful Wizards in the world and blah blah blah however over time Grindelwald got greedy and dangerous and Albus no longer aligned with his vision of the future all of that culminated in a massive battle between Grindelwald Albus and albus's brother aberforth a battle that resulted in The Accidental murder of Ariana Dumbledore albus's sister now here's the thing we know this battle took place in the year 1899 and the story clearly states that after that battle Grindelwald fled the scene and went on the run and Albus and Grindelwald did not see each other for decades I'm guessing it was three decades to be more exact because Fantastic Beasts 3 opens with Dumbledore and Grindelwald meeting at a cafe in 1932 for what I assume is the first time since the big incident okay so here's my question when the [ __ ] did they make this bloodpath this makes no sense there's literally no moment where they could have made a magical blood pack to prevent themselves from hurting each other because with that logic it would mean they had to make the blood pack before the big battle that killed Ariana right because that's the last time they saw each other but that's not possible because if they had already made the pack then how the hell did they fight each other during the battle in the first place that event itself proved that by the time Ariana died they had not made The Pact yet so how does The Pact even exist if Dumbledore and Grindelwald didn't see each other between 1899 and 1932. you're not making any sense at all literally the main story point that drives this entire franchise is a plot hole the very pillar that holds this whole Saga together literally cannot exist it's canonically impossible for it to exist good job Joanne you're a disappointment on so many levels right now anyways I'm already losing my mind here um crimes of Grindelwald sucks everybody knows it so let's get to the next movie Fantastic Beasts the secrets of Dumbledore it's kind of unfair to come at Fantastic Beasts 3. I almost feel bad for it honestly this movie was sent out to die there was Zero Buzz for it nobody cared about it it was Dead on Arrival and the studio knew that hell for the first two weeks after its release I didn't even know this movie was out and once I found out I did not rush out to go see it I kind of didn't feel like watching it actually and I know I'm not the only one because at the time of this recording the secrets of Dumbledore is the lowest grossing movie of the entire Harry Potter franchise by a lot this movie kind of bombed which is significant because the boss of Warner Brothers has made it very clear that he was not on board with the idea of continuing on with the five planned films in the series and he confirmed they were waiting to see how Fantastic Beasts 3 would perform at the box office before green lighting the final two installments meaning as of right now it seems very likely that the Fantastic Beasts Saga will end up abandoned and unfinished just like the Divergent franchise all thanks to the secrets of Dumbledore and here's the thing I don't even think this movie is that bad I mean don't get me wrong it's a bad movie it's terrible it's not good and we're gonna talk about why in a minute but it isn't nearly as terrible as crimes of Grindelwald like crimes of Grindelwald was kind of embarrassing it still blows my mind to this day how unapologetically awful it is but secrets of Dumbledore is just painfully mediocre so in a way it is an improvement but not an impressive one it's probably due to the fact that unlike crimes of Grindelwald this movie was not written by JK Rowling alone she had help but even then uh it's not even close to being enough to save this franchise and the problems are really quick with this one right off the bat as soon as this movie starts it's already having plot holes it's immediately being stupid see the first movie in the series takes place in the year 1927 but in this movie Jacob says he's known newt's Commander for a year which means secrets of Dumbledore should be taking place in 1928 right well no because like I previously mentioned the movie then clings to be taking place in the year 1932. five years after the events of the first movie so how is it that Jacob met Newt in 1927 but five years later he's only known him for a year I I just I I don't know [ __ ] me for paying attention I guess look I'm not gonna sugarcoat it the secrets of Dumbledore is messy this movie is kind of all over the place the reason why is because like the last movie the story is not very focused at its core Fantastic Beasts 3 is a movie that is essentially about a rigged election and if that sounds insanely boring for a movie in the Harry Potter Universe it's because it is this movie is boring as [ __ ] it's also completely removed from the plot of the previous entry secrets of Dumbledore kind of does its own thing not in a fun cheeky clever way but more in a JK Rowling and David Yates have no idea where they're actually going with this story kind of way there are some threads that carry over sort of but only in a vague and flimsy manner yes Grindelwald is still the villain but his goals are suddenly not the same as the previous movie now that I think about it this move movie is not at all interested in any of the massive plot points the last movie established most of the characters ended the previous installment in a place that clearly set up their new arc for this installment except these arcs just don't happen for some reason every character that had a place in the story solidified in crimes of Grindelwald is somehow re-rendered useless in secrets of Dumbledore let me explain at the end of the previous movie Queenie joins Grindelwald and abandons the heroes meaning she's now one of the few main characters that have a reason to exist in this story and actively take part in it but in this movie Queenie does absolutely nothing he just stands around and you get some close-up shots of her looking worried and that's literally it she's here the whole movie and she never does anything and then she just goes back to the good guys and she doesn't face any consequences for leaving them them and joining the terrorist in the last movie so what was the point of her Arc the whole reason why Queenie joined Grindelwald in the previous movie is because she wants to find a way to legally marry Jacob who is a muggle but in this movie not only is that never mentioned again but at the end of the movie Queenie casually returns to the good guys with zero consequences and then she marries Jacob anyway you're telling me they could have just done that from the start I ask again then what was the point of her Arc it was amazing Tina also has a solidified reason to exist in the story now because her sister Queenie joined Grindelwald at the end of the last movie so you'd assume this movie would have her make a move to try and get her sister back at all costs it makes perfect sense that Arc literally writes itself she has a perfect motivation and has even more of a reason to try to find Credence and Grindelwald great she finally has a legitimate reason to be a main character I'm super happy with that give her the play she deserves in the story so imagine my surprise when I find out that Tina is not in this movie at all she's just not in it she appears in it twice she's in one shot halfway through the movie and then she appears in the final scene for about 30 to 40 seconds and the reason they give you for her not being a part of the story is that she's busy at work I'm not kidding Tina's not available um Tina's been promoted she's very very busy from well from what I understand it's been heavily speculated that Catherine Waterson who plays Tina was essentially written out of the franchise as punishment for publicly speaking out against JK Rowling's anti-trance comments and so they decided for some reason to write her out in the laziest way possible good job Joanne all of this effort to still be wrong in the last movie newt's brother Theseus sees his fiance getting murdered right in front of him by Grindelwald In Cold Blood she literally disintegrated like she might as well have been killed by Thanos so you would assume that his Arc in this movie would be about him grieving or attempting to get Justice for her murder you think there would be something related to the death of leaderless strange for him some storyline some kind of emotional turmoil that would make sense right but no in this movie The CS is here and he's part of the good guy Squad trying to take down grindel wall but he's like not affected by anything his character is left completely unchanged by the death of Lita he's all smiles and he's being witty and he's even flirting with other women he doesn't give a [ __ ] about Leta apparently in fact I'm pretty sure he doesn't even mention her once in this whole movie it's like she was never there so the Cs who had a perfect reason to now go after Grindelwald to either get revenge or closure for the death of Lita just doesn't have an arc in this movie at all even though he had the potential for a great one being laid right in front of him newt's brother is just a bad character he's mainly here to instigate Exposition most of his lines are like I'm guessing we're here for a reason or I'm guessing this is why you brought me here or I'm guessing this has something to do with Grindelwald just so that other characters can explain the plot out loud for us and I suppose you'd like to tell me what this is about would you I'm assuming that's why he can't move against him yes I take it where for a reason so this proposal I take it the children has something to do with it I take it when I have for the finger sandwiches it's so lame there's also no reason for Kama to be back in this franchise Not only was the reason for his presence in the last movie an absolute mind [ __ ] of overly convoluted storylines that ended up just wasting time and that for the most part made no sense but comma story also came to a close in the last movie he was here to kill Credence because he believed Credence was corvus lestrain but then he found out the real corvus list range accidentally drowned as a baby okay sure so now his story is effectively over I mean technically though he should have died because he broke an unbreakable vow but whatever he has no reason to exist in this story his thread is done except it's not because in this movie he shows up and he's just on the good guys team not only that but Alba's dumb Dumbledore personally selected him to be part of his Squad to move against Grindelwald and I'm sorry but that makes no sense the moment he shows up the movie tries to pull an air of uncertainty where everybody wanders hmm can we trust comma is he with us or will he betray us which on paper could be a solid idea I guess but it just doesn't work in the way they execute it because that would work if we knew anything about Kama which we don't we don't know anything about Kama as a person so in the same way we don't have a reason to want him on the good guy team we also have no reason to doubt his values within the conflict at hand because we don't know what his values are comma is a complete stranger to the audience we literally have no reason to care about his presence or his Allegiance and then the movie tries to pull a Switcheroo where you think he's betraying the hero Rose and he joins Grindelwald but then he reappears in the third act and knocks out a couple bad guys so you can go whoa he was a good guy all along except why why did he do that stalling this whole time to then just turn around and flip-flop was stupid he didn't actually help the heroes it was not like getting them an advantage on anyone just slowed them down significantly this one plot line really bothered me because the movie treats it like this big twist and Revelation you should be thrilled about but news flash it's the end of the movie and we still don't know anything about Kama he barely spoke three words the whole movie he has the least amount of lines out of everybody whether he's a good guy or not is not gonna change the fact that I don't care about him you and your sister share an ancient bloodline shared that's the only thing we shared I don't care man Jacob is a fun character that I'm pretty sure most people will view as the best character of this franchise but he feels so forced in this movie his art ended perfectly in the first one and now they always have to find a reason to keep him around and he doesn't need to be here oh and by now you're probably noticing that I have not mentioned Newt once since I started talking about this movie and that's because this by being the protagonist for the third time Newt is still the least important character out of everybody even Kama is more relevant to this story than Newt is and comma is not even relevant to the story at all Newt is just as useless as he was in the previous film and he's still not doing much of anything as it's often been said he doesn't have anything to do with this story there are no Stakes for him so he doesn't work as a protagonist because he has nothing to gain and nothing to lose from this entire Mission there is no tragedy no conflict no sense of urgency so it's impossible to care about what he's doing because he doesn't matter if Newt is taken out of this movie and the previous movie entirely the events of this franchise will be the exact same he does not matter in fact none of the characters really matter to see is just here because he's newt's brother but he is also not concerned at all by the conflict at hand Lally Hicks isn't even related to any of the characters here she doesn't have a relationship with any of them and we never see her build a relationship with any of them and on top of everything we never learn anything about her throughout this entire franchise never has an arc she's just there talking weird you know what they say a book can take you around the world and back all you have to do is open it this side is a joint Keller Grindelwald in a stock Omnia followers who posed the single greatest threat to both your world and ours and full centuries anything you can do to Scotch that would be greatly appreciated it's my pleasure I shall welcome the challenge besides I'll have Jacob with me why is she talking like that she does not matter I literally just remembered she was in the previous movie I thought this was her first one this is her second movie in this franchise and we still don't know the first thing about her she's never been established she just appears in scene like I said earlier comma also has no reason to be here at all he only crossed paths with the characters briefly in the last movie while he was in the middle of settling an issue that was not at all related to Geller Grindelwald like as far as he's concerned all of those people are complete strangers on a suicide mission he has no reason to take part in it's just it makes no sense for him to now band together with them to take down Grindelwald he has no motivations no Stakes no reason nothing you could say his motivation was to take revenge on Grindelwald because Grindelwald could lead a little strange in the last movie and Lita was comma's sister but in this movie he literally comes face to face with Grindelwald and he goes hey you killed my sister and Grindelwald is like oh okay if you want I can just erase your memory and you won't remember that and he just goes yeah okay and then it's never mentioned again I swear he just erases his memory and then you never hear about it again it's just just like I said no motivations no Stakes no reason nothing he's only here because Joanne is forcing him to be Jacob is the only one who would have a legitimate reason to move against Grindelwald because his girlfriend is currently with Grindelwald and he wants to get her back okay that that makes sense but here's my question why the [ __ ] would Dumbledore want to throw Jacob in the middle of this of all the people Albus knows and Trust why would he choose him to go to war Jacob is a muggle he doesn't have magical powers he doesn't even want to get involved Miss Hicks says that Dumbledore needs Jacob on his Suicide Squad because Jacob is a good person okay but why there's literally nothing he can do here you want to know how I know that because Jacob doesn't do anything I witnessed it by watching the movie I I saw him as he did nothing he's the comic relief character yes I know I love him for it he's funny and Dan fogler is brilliant in this role but being funny is not justification enough for a character to take such a large portion of his story the only character that is legitimate to be front and center in the story of this franchise is the only one that isn't Dumbledore but instead of being the one in the front lines doing stuff he spends the whole movie giving orders to people he just stands around looking [ __ ] sexy because God damn Jude Law and he asked people to do things for him without ever explaining why they're doing these things assuming you're not otherwise engaged frankly even if you are I encourage you to attend tonight's candidates dinner take Mr Kowalski I'm quite certain there'll be an assassination attempt and that's it he never explains who is targeted for an assassination who would be carrying that assassination or why Jacob needs to be there he just blindly listened to him without question or without information see what I mean like it's impossible to care about the events taking place in this movie because for most of it we don't know what the characters are doing or why they're doing it and the only character who knows all of that never explains any of it I think when they're trying to pull off narratively is this idea that Dumbledore predicted every single one of the events that occurred during the movie because he's just that smart I guess but it's not really possible and it doesn't really make sense like he gave Jacob a fake wand because he predicted that Lally Hicks would use magic to make him seem magical once the political dinner went South which means he also predicted the political dinner would go south but how why he also made newt's assistant build a copy of the suitcase and explicitly told her to not tell noon about it because I guess he predicted that Newt would fail at his mission so I guess he wanted her to then bring the real suitcase once he did but then how how did he predict that Newt would fail at this exact moment the timing was perfect how could he predict that how did he know she would be needed in this exact moment that would mean that Albus predicted every single event of the movie down to the minute and he anticipated every little hiccup the characters go through and that would even insinuate that he predicted that the Sears would get captured and that Newt would go rescue him in a German prison it's just so stupid and weirdly far-fetched and it still doesn't make the plan make sense I genuinely believe that JK Rowling thought that if she made the plan super vague and nonsensical and secretive enough people would just assume that they don't get it because it's super smart but no it's just lazy writing none of the actions in this movie are coherent none of it adds up none of it makes sense this whole movie is just a bunch of nonsense and I think JK knew it didn't make sense because when Newt starts explaining the plan to the other characters earlier in the movie he says that their best chance to defeat Grindelwald is to confuse him and to save our world to save your world Jacob then our best hope is to confuse him don't ask me what that means it doesn't mean anything he just says that and it's never explained but it feels like JK didn't really know what to do in the movie and she just needed plot and she just didn't know what to do so she wrote a movie that is entirely incoherent and hope people will just think nothing makes sense because it's meant to be confusing and the thing is I think one of the reasons this movie feels so weird is because it was entirely Rewritten very quickly like in a rush the reason I say that is because the first details we ever got about the story of Fantastic Beasts 3 do not at all match the movie we actually got in 2019 it was announced that Fantastic Beasts 3 was going to take place in Brazil but if you've seen the movie uh yeah no that's that's not true at all the movie goes to New York a couple times but mostly takes place in Germany not a single scene in this movie takes place in Brazil which leads me to believe that most of the script was Rewritten especially because we do see the Brazilian minister of magic throughout the movie but she barely has any lines and she doesn't do anything so it seems like her entire part in the plot was cut and same for Tina being written out the way she's written out of the story is such an afterthought that you can just tell it was a last minute decision the entire thing feels like it was written in 12 minutes by somebody who was late to work like okay let me break down the main threat of this movie for you like I previously mentioned in secrets of Dumbledore we are dealing with the rigged election basically it is time to elect the new leader of the Wizarding World you have a bunch of Ministers of magic from around the world and they're campaigning and doing rallies and they're trying to get the people's approval which doesn't make sense at all because this movie also teaches us that the leader of the Wizarding World is not selected by a popular vote but by a rare magical creature called a Chile this little Pokemon has the ability to see the future and recognize a leader with the Pure Heart well that's convenient so the way the Wizarding World elects a new leader is by kidnapping a Chillin bringing it in front of the candidates and wait for it to bow in front of the leader it deems the purest of heart I just foreign I know it sounds like I'm making this up but I promise you it's true you can look it up so Grindelwald now wants to become the leader of the Wizarding World so he can declare war on the Muggles important note in the previous movie Grindelwald says he wants to get rid of the Muggles because he had a vision of World War II and he was trying to prevent it but in this movie his motivation is completely dropped it's never mentioned again and now he says he wants to eradicate the Muggles and have the Wizards dominate the world openly because he thinks it's their Birthright anyway so grindelwald's plan to become leader of the Wizards is to steal the Chillin before election day kill it see the future in its blood it's never explained why he does that or what he even sees in the future but whatever and then reanimate it so that he can have a zombie chilling he can control and then bribe another elected official to bring the zombie chill in on Election Day in order to get great Angel wall to win by making the children choose him I promise you this is the real plot of the movie that's that's literally what happened but the thing is that Grindelwald doesn't know that there is a second Chilean a twin to the one he killed and that Chillin is in the possession of newt's Commander so Dumbledore recruits Newt again along with a bunch of other randos and he asked them to well actually I don't know it's never actually explained what Dumbledore's plan is so something something Dumbledore tries to counter Grindelwald something something and I will say that for a movie titled the secrets of Dumbledore um yeah we don't learn any of them Dumbledore's secrets you could say being in love with Grindelwald was one of the secrets but we've already known that for a while and Credence being a secret member of The Dumbledore family doesn't work either because Albus says in the movie that he genuinely didn't know about Credence and even funnier than that this movie just forgot the twist that set it up in crimes of Grindelwald Grindelwald reveals to Credence that his real name is Aurelius Dumbledore and that Albus is trying to destroy him but the big detail is that he tells Credence that Alba's Dumbledore is his brother that was the big reveal but I guess JK Rowling just kind of forgot about that or she just changed her mind in between movies because in this movie Credence is no longer albus's brother but his nephew out of nowhere he's revealed to be the secret son of Abra 4th Dumbledore albus's older brother and before you ask no this twist does not mean anything and does not go anywhere oh God this movie is all over the place but I think the ultimate reason why these movies don't hit the same as their Harry Potter Saga is because the Fantastic Beast movies are lacking the most effective element given to the narrative structure of the previous franchise and that element is Mystery one of the strongest elements in the storytelling of Harry Potter is that each and every single one of the stories take place at the center of a mystery there's always an enigma to solve for the audience and that's one of the big reasons why they're so engaging Harry Potter 1 what is Dumbledore hiding inside of Hogwarts who is trying to steal it and why Harry Potter 2 who is the heir of Salazar Slytherin who opened the Chamber of Secrets why and who or what is attack liking children in the school Harry Potter 3 who is Sirius Black how did he escape from Azkaban where is he and why is he coming after Harry Harry Potter 4 who put Harry's name in The Goblet of Fire who is trying to sabotage him during the trial with her tournament and why Harry Potter 5 what is a department of mysteries what is Voldemort looking for in it and why is Dumbledore not speaking to Harry Harry Potter 6 who is the Half-Blood Prince who has been sending dangerous gifts to the students what happened to Dumbledore's hand who was Professor Slughorn and why are his secrets so important to the fate of the world Harry Potter 7 who is RAB where are the horcruxes and who sent a Patronus to guide Harry to The Sword of Gryffindor every single one of these stories have a solid point of intrigue to make the audience engaged in what's happening you want to know what happens next because you want answers you're engaged there's an edge the plot pulls some 180s on you in Fantastic Beasts though it's literally the opposite nothing about the story of this movie makes you engage there's nothing to care about there's nothing to surprise you there's nothing to look forward to at the beginning of the movie the characters stand around in a room and tell you out loud exactly everything that's going to happen in the movie and then it just happens there is no twist no surprise no struggle nothing the entirety of the dialogue is blatantly lazy Exposition so basically every single scene in this movie is just composed of people standing around and explaining what is currently happening out loud and then they explain what they're going to do next and then you watch them do it and then they regroup and they explain the plot again and then they say what they're going to do next and then you watch them do it and so on and so on it is the most redundant and boring plot structure ever and the only reason the plot advances is because the characters are just so dumb and incompetent like they will have villains with answers to their questions right in front of them and he could just like jog very lightly to catch up to them but they decide to just walk like really do you guys not know how to run there were like a couple steps ahead of you you literally let them Escape because you're stupid you also have wands and Magic that allow you to petrify people you know in case they try to run away from you anyways it's not like the villains are compelling either way most of them don't have names and even if they do they don't have lines grindelwald's right hand woman has been here for two movies and we still don't know anything about her I think she has a total of four lines in this movie and I could not remember her name even if I had a gun to my head and I gotta say despite all the drama with Johnny Depp and people being upset that he lost the role of Grindelwald the way he did I have to be honest here and say that mads Michael son is infinitely better in this role I'm sorry Max Mickelson is Geller Grindelwald was a brilliant casting choice I think he was excellent he's one of those actors who just owned the screen he has such a mystical presence he's infinitely more threatening as Grindelwald than Johnny Depp ever was mostly because Johnny's Take on the character looked particularly goofy it was kind of impossible to take him seriously but mads Mickelson in this role is just great the problem is that well Grindelwald in this movie just like in the last one doesn't do all that much he's kind of a lame villain no matter who plays it and look like I said I'm all about criticizing the things I love while I adore the Harry Potter Saga I also have no problem admitting that Lord Voldemort is just not that great of a villain he's very one note and he seriously likes layers long story short he's just evil for the sake of being evil and while it still works for what the story is yeah Voldemort is not the most compelling villain out there but at least he's doing [ __ ] he's like making things he's in the physical villain Grindelwald is so Bland that like the story needs to change out of nowhere to make itself interesting because he just does not carry the story at all as an antagonist and when I say the story changes randomly I mean that out of nowhere like halfway through the movie The Plot changes and it becomes about saving Credence or Aurelius because apparently he's dying now we don't really know why he's dying but he is he was completely fine in the last movie and he was completely fine in the first half of this movie but now he's dying because he's too powerful apparently and I I just want to point out how random credence's Arc has been this whole time in the first movie we find out that Credence is an obscurus a being that has repressed magic that kind of manifests into this extremely dangerous thing long story short he is destined to die he's super unstable his powers are out of control he's basically you're taking time bomb there's nothing we can do for him he is Doom then at the end of the movie Credence literally explodes he's attacked by the authorities and he becomes so unstable that he literally disintegrates himself and he's supposed to be dead that was the whole thing Newt comes to try and save Credence but he fails and Credence dies end of the movie then in the next movie they realized they wanted Ezra Miller back so Credence is just alive and like they never explain how he's alive he just is he explodes at the end of the last movie and then this movie starts and he's just there he's just here like nothing happened like you're you're just supposed to accept it then in this movie he's still here and he's still in good health there's nothing that ever suggested that his health was declining he's fighting and stuff he has a whole fight scene with Dumbledore that is probably like the one scene in the movie that made me feel a little bit alive and then like he's just dying and by the way the same way the last movie never explains how he's still alive after disintegrating in the first movie this movie never explains why he's dying yeah at the end of the movie he collapses and then the story just forgets about him so we don't actually know if he died or not I mean I'm guessing he did die because if there is a fantastic Beast 4 which is very unlikely there is no [ __ ] way Ezra Miller is coming back anyways this movie ends weirdly long story short Grindelwald tricks everyone with the fake Chillin and he becomes the great supreme leader of the Wizards and literally the second he's chosen as leader he immediately declares war on the Muggles it's like his first sentence begins today quick reminder that all these people are supposed to believe he is pure of heart so they should be pretty confused right now but yeah whatever Newt and The Suicide Squad show up immediately after and they expose him for being a fraud and things go south very quickly but this this is where the ending gets really stupid because once again this movie decides to resolve things by breaking its own rules after being exposed as a fraud by The Suicide Squad Grindelwald snaps and tries to murder Credence in front of everybody Albus immediately intervenes and he casts a spell to counter Grindelwald now already that should not be possible Albus should not be able to fight off grindelwald's spell the blood pact would instantly kill him but okay I'll let it slide just for that time I'll let it slide you're being stupid but what I'm not going to let slide is the fact that instead of Killing Him countering grindelwald's spell actually destroys the blood pack it undoes it which what it makes absolutely no sense you're telling me that the magical blood pack that's impossible to break was undone by doing the exact thing it was created to forbid are you kidding me and it's so funny because the movie itself clearly doesn't have an explanation for it it's just as vague and nonsensical as the rest of the movie I thought you couldn't move against one another we didn't he sought to kill isil to protect our spells met let's call it fate hey bro the [ __ ] up but anyways so The Pact is now broken which means Dumbledore and Grindelwald can now fight each other and then we proceed with the very first one-on-one fight between the two most powerful Wizards known to the world Dumbledore versus Grindelwald and this has to be the most boring fight in the entire Harry Potter franchise [Music] this is the first time I'm turning my brain back on so it looks so Bland it's so unexciting and flat it barely feels like a climax it looks ugly as hell and I just I I don't understand I would like to remind you that this fight was directed by the same man who brought us one of the most epic one-on-one jewels in cinema history and in the same Cinematic Universe foreign [Music] this is the same guy both of these scenes were directed by David Yates I don't understand how that's possible it's like you're not even trying man whatever so after the most underwhelming fight scene ever obviously Grindelwald escapes because they can't have him be defeated now even if Dumbledore can fight him do you know why because this movie supposedly takes place in the year 1932 but we also know from the Canon that Gallard Grindelwald is finally defeated in a legendary duel against Albus Dumbledore in 1945. and since there's supposed to be two more movies in this franchise you know we're gonna be wasting a whole lot of time to get to that and then the movie ends with emo Dumbledore walking away from Jacob and queenie's wedding as the rest of the movie blatantly forgets to resolve most of its storylines [Laughter] third movie of the Fantastic Beasts franchise and most probably its last this Saga is almost certainly going to end as a messy incoherent and incomplete Trilogy with no real resolution and honestly yeah yeah that makes sense Fantastic Beasts is a franchise that spent most of its run time desperately trying to justify its own existence and after six years three movies and well over a billion dollars spent by Warner Brothers it never really managed to achieve that if anything this film series only contributed to further damage the legacy of Harry Potter outside of real world stuff and that's pretty sad yeah as much of a Harry Potter shell as I am I think I would be comfortable saying that Fantastic Beasts is probably the most useless Blockbuster franchise of our time it is the greatest example of one decent inoffensive movie that should have never had a sequel Fantastic Beasts should have just been one movie just like Jurassic Park Transformers saw taken or even Jaws up there with all these movies that should have never been turned into long last think franchises but alas Hollywood will always choose money look despite everything despite the shitty prequels despite the crumbling lore and despite JK Rowling being herself I still love Harry Potter it's had too big of an impact on my life I just can't bring myself to hate it with that said though I am now totally happy with the Harry Potter Universe being done I will never need another book another spin-off another movie let's not even talk about stage plays I am completely okay and at peace with this franchise being over for the rest of time I mean back in January 2021 there were reports that HBO Max was discussing making a TV show in the Harry Potter universe but it either got stuck in development hell or No Deal was ever reached behind the scenes because it's been almost two years and we haven't heard anything about it but let's not be naive here it is absolutely certain that Warner Brothers will keep on trying to capitalize on something as big as the Harry Potter franchise whether it's in a year or in five years or in 10 years it'll come back in some way shape or form nothing that's related to Harry Potter can be made without a direct approval of JK Rowling but if she somehow agreed to these shitty prequels and wrote them herself and if she somehow agreed to make Harry Potter and the cursed child Cannon I have absolutely no doubt she will bring it back again and again probably to make more money even if it means destroying the legacy of the original Saga in the process and so as a devoted Harry Potter fan my final words on this hurt to say but are necessary to be heard Let It Die [Music] foreign [Music]

Channel: Friendly Space Ninja

Views: 1,062,875

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Id: voHX_BsQdRQ

Length: 60min 58sec (3658 seconds)

Published: Sun Oct 23 2022