Shayne: No, you're my favorite pizza place. Alright Bye, Sexy. *hangs up phone* Courtney: UUHHH I'M SO HUNGRY! I wish I can just go on break and eat somewhere Shayne: You don't have to go anywhere. We got all this pizza right here! **emotional breakdown** Courtney: Yeah, I'd rather eat my own ass. Shayne: Yeah, same. EVERY DOMINO'S EVER Courtney: UUUHH YUMM PIZZA TIME!! Olivia: Here we go! Both: Sweet! Two pizzas! Courtney: Umm can I have pineapple on it? Shayne: Absolutely not. Shayne: Dammit! *Answers phone* Thank you for calling Domino's Would you like to try our inedible Monstrosity pizza? Keith: Uh, no thanks. Can I get a stuffed crust pizza? Shayne: Mh, that's Pizza Hut. Not Domino's. Keith: Okay, I'll do a cheesy bits pizza with buffalo sauce. Shayne: Also Pizza Hut, not Domino's. Keith: NFL sponsored pizza. Shayne: Pizza Hut. Keith: Pizza joint with the weird red roof. Shayne: That is Pizza Hut. Keith: Pizza made by a racist? Shayne: Oh that's Papa Johns! Keith: Let me call them. Shayne: Great. Keith: Bye! Ian: Oh HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT Noah: Yo, when's this pizza getting here, man? Keith: Ugh, I don't know but let's check the pizza tracker. Looks like he's leaving the store right now. Noah: Good! Keith: And it looks like he's driving really fast! Noah: Nice! Keith: Hold on, too fast! Yo, now he's being pulled over by the cops. This is not good. Oh, no. His license is expired and he has two warrants out. Yo, he's being arrested! And now the cop has our pizza! What the- *knocking* Voice through the door: Police! You got a medium sausage and onion? Noah: You got a little bit of um... Pizza sauce Police: No, that's human sauce. That'll be $12.50. Domino's! When you're here, you're high! Stacey: Josh! Did you find a place yet? I'm starving! Josh *sighs*: Stacey, the only place open is Domino's. Stacey: I guess we'll just have to get Domino's. Josh: Okay, fine. But just this once! *picks up phone* Hi Josh! Josh: Hi. Employee: Look who came crawling back to good ole' Domino's. Josh cringes: I know. Employee: You think you can do better but you never will. Josh: Yeah. Employee *pops lips*: Why do you only call me when you're drunk, Josh? Josh: Look, I'm sorry! Medium cheese? Just like old times? Josh: Yes! But this is the last time! Employee: That's what they all say, Josh. But they always come back. They always come back Wish I knew how to quit you Cool we'll get to you in 30 minutes. *hangs up* We got a medium cheese. Oh, garlic knots! Oh! *knock knock* Hi, I have two large double cheese pizzas! Customer: Thank you Employee: Have a good one. Customer: Uh, just so you know, this isn't all just for me Employee: Okay. Also, I worked out today so I kind of deserve it. Employee: Alright! Customer: Also have a job and I've kissed someone before Congratulations, dude, have a good day. Customer: Yeah! *closes door and cries* Sweet, cheesy goodness! Thanks for calling Domino's. What can I get you? Yo, can I get uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Right, that'll work Employee: This is Domino's, would you like to try our expired meat pasta? Customer: No, but can I order a chicken habanero sandwich? Employee: Excuse me? Employee: Chicken habanero sandwich *rose blooms like in Beauty and the beast* Someone did it! Someone ordered the chicken habanero sandwich, the curse has been broken *Screams* Thank you! Both: We're free! **lol** **ring ring** Courtney: Actually can I have that side? Olivia: I mean, I'm gluten-free so I'll have this side. Shayne: What are the launch codes? No you tell me. All right. I'll call back later Give me back my son Keith: Hello, Papa John's. Shayne: What's up? Keith: Yo, I heard you hella racist! Shayne: Yeah! Keith: Is that true? Shayne: Yeah. Keith: As long as you own it, I ain't mad at you. I hate you too, bitch. Shayne: Cool. Keith: Alright, bye Stop stop stop Thank you so much Deepak Chopra Could I also get the chicken habanero sandwich Yeah you can get the chicken habanero sandwich Thank you That's so nuts. Okay. Goodbye minister of another important country Bust down Thotiana SUB2SMOSH, Luv u. Translated by Beray Nil Atabey. Instagram: @nil_atabey. Youtube: Nil Atabey If you want to see EVERY SUBWAY EVER click the box on the left and to see EVERY FOOD DELIVERY EVER Click the box on the right. Bbbye! (don't forget YOU'RE MY FAVORITE PIZZA PLACE)
What's a break?
I’m dead. This is too accurate. I loved the animal fest pizza and expired meat pasta upsell.
clearly not written by anyone who ever worked at a Domino's
I'd like those 5 minutes back please
This is Smosh?