Dining Etiquette: how to master the basic table manners

[Music] hello I'm Thomas Alva an international social etiquette consultant and author of the book etiquette the least you need to know in today's video I'm gonna be telling you about what is the least that you need to know about dining etiquette before I get started let's address two questions number one what are table manners table manners is basically your behavior around the table so how you hold cutlery is how you eat even what kind of conversation you hold all make a part of table manners second question that people often ask me why do we even need table manners especially in today's world where our restaurants are casual dining places and we often have informal dining experience the truth is you need to have good table manners for your own good who feel more comfortable at the table and you'll put others at the table at ease with your good manners so whatever the occasion whatever the degree of her mouth of the dinner is make sure you put your best foot forward let's talk about seating arrangement where should you sit if you're a guest and you are invited by a host or you say your date then you would wait for him or her to gesture with this suit and take your seat afterwards if you're the host then you do the same with point 50 that's intended for your guests and he or she will take their seat so the rule of thumb is that the guests always gets the best seats that meaning he or she will be facing the main area the entrance so he or she will get the best view if you have multiple guests then one guests will be your guests of honor and you should save that best seat for him or her now that we have seated down we need to remember couple is number one don't slouch don't sit like this roll your shoulders backwards straighten your back and sit straight number two don't press your back to the back of the chair imagine we have a little kitten behind your back so you are not press the little kitten leave some space between the back of the chair and your own back number three do not place your elbows at a table when eating however it is acceptable to place your elbows at the table whenever you're taking break between the meal to have a conversation number four according to American dining etiquette you're supposed to leave your hands on your lap whenever they're not holding cutleries and French dining etiquette you're supposed to always rest your wrist at the table so your hands remain visible to your dining partners at all times this comes from an old outdated notion that you might be holding some weapon in your hand and you're hiding it on your lap underneath the table the question that I get asked a lot is what should I do with my phone on my back the general rule is that whatever it is not belong to the dining experience by itself should be held away from the table that applies to your phone and your back you should silence your phone before sitting down and put it in your pocket or your back for your back if it's a large bag you can place it on a special little chair designed for that back or you can ask for a back holder which looks like a hook and you can hand your back from there else you can also place your bag on an empty chair nearby or it's now it is acceptable to place about behind your back so but food in a very rare cases if you have a small bag that's like a clutch you can place it on your lap and cover it with a napkin whatever you do do not place your back on a ground level and some cultures and some traditions it seemed to bring back up and actually it shows that you don't respect the money that you're holding in your back so tip it always above the ground level let's now look at our dining table where should I start this is my dinner table setting I have a napkin a plate the soup spoons salad fork and knife main course fork and knife dessert fork dessert spoon the reserve box should be much smaller than this but this is what I'm gonna serve and I'll be using it next I have the bread plate where I'm gonna eat my bread and I have a butter knife so the interesting part about this knife is that unlike traditional knives this has a dull blade and it's used to scoop the butter and to spread it rather than cut it next I have my glasses so in order not to confuse which one is whose I'm gonna make this letters B and D with my fingers so where B is pointing that's where my bread plate and butter knife is and where D is pointing that's where the glasses are in order not to confuse it with that of your dining partners use this trick so now you are set it down you unfold the napkin if you're the host you do it first to indicate it to your guests you can do it in two ways one with fold lines facing outward like this or the other way around when you have the folded lines facing inwards towards you I actually prefer this way this is because I can basically have my fingers and leave the stains inside so from the outside my napkin looks perfectly clean once you place the napkin on your lap you would use it to gently wipe your fingers and also dab your lips with it if necessary if you are going to bathroom and you will be back you would place a napkin on the chair to indicate that you will be coming back if you are leaving the table for good and you're not coming back then you place the napkin on the left side of the plate and gently fold it no need to shape it back to its original shape and leave the table if you happen to drop your napkin you can pick it up if you're ok with that or you can also indicate to the waiter that you want a new one the glass is also often get confused which glass is for what there's no need to worry about it because the waiter or the son Leo would usually fill your glass so but it's good to know what is for what let's look at this arrangement here generally the taller glasses should be behind the shorter glasses or the glass are often arranged in the order of their height from the tallest the shortest look at my arrangement I can see that I have a glassware water and that's for white wine and a glass of champagne so let's start with a water goblet it usually doesn't have a stem like you see in this case and you hold the water goblet by the bottom of the bowl like this this is quite recognizable glass it's a champagne glass it's longer thin the shape assures that the bubbles in the champagne stay intact while you're enjoying your drink also make sure that you hold this glass by the stem so your fingers are not actually touching the ball and are not warming up the drink while you're drinking it this is a white wine glass unlike the red wine glass which are shorter and larger this bus is longer and thinner the width one glass is shorter and larger because red wines have much water taste notes and they need more area to breathe with the red wine glass booth hold by the bottom of the bowl so imagine this a red wine glass will hold it like this for the white wine glass you have to fill it by the stem so you don't warm up your brain while you're drinking it so let's get started with our low before you start watch your host to commence if he or she starts to eat then it's time to enjoy your meal if you're in a large group of people then you would wait for everyone to be served with their meal and then you'll start to eat so the bread plate is used to enjoy the piece of bread and I used a butter knife to pick the butter and spread it on their breath peace and then I'm gonna enjoy one bite at a time the first meal that I'm gonna be enjoying is a soup I'm gonna use the soup spoon dip it in the center of the bowl take it to the opposite edge of the bowl slide gently and then bring the spoon to my mouth in order to make sure that I don't get any spills on my lap for my second course I'm gonna have a salad I'm gonna use a salt Oregon salad knife I will show you two ways of eating and one is American which I'm gonna currently show you so you cut one bite of mozzarella and tomato at a time then you would place your knife and then you switch your work to the other hand and eat it like that the other way is the European or continental way of dining where I would just use the fork and knife and in the same way and use it to cut my tomato and mozzarella and then what's gonna happen I'm gonna leave the knife in my hand and eat it like that here I have my main course which is chicken breast with Parmesan I'm gonna use the main course fork and a main course knife to cut in the chicken breasts one piece at a time when you're done with the new you place your fork and knife in a position 12 to 6 o clock with tines facing upwards or downwards like the French dining etiquette does usually or you can also place it in a position of 10:00 to 4:00 o'clock just like this and with a fork facing tines facing down or facing up it's up to you once you've finished your main course it's now time to enjoy the dessert this is a perfect time to excuse yourself from the table and use the bathroom if you wish so so here I have a dessert fork in a dessert spoon I will slide them to the both sides affective sites I'm gonna be using a fork as a holder and a spoon to cut as a knife so I'm going to hold the dessert with a fork and cut it with the spoon that I'm gonna use the fork to push any remaining particles that I want on my spoon and use a spoon to eat my dessert once you're done eating your dinner it's time to indicate to the waiter that you're expecting the bill you can do so by having an eye contact with a waiter or by raising your hands at your elbow once you have paid the bill it's time to leave you should take your napkin fold it not too neatly and place it on the left side of your plate and leave if you're the host you do so indicate in to your guest that it's time to leave if you're a guest you watch the host to do so and you leave on a final note if this was a dinner you were invited to make sure you sent a thank you message to the host the next day if you really truly loved the dinner experience you might also consider sending flowers with a butyl handwritten thank-you notes I guarantee you a beautiful handwritten thank-you note will serve you a long long way thank you so much for watching this video and I hope you really enjoyed it as much as I enjoy filming this for you I'll see you next time bye you [Music]

Channel: Jamila Musayeva

Views: 2,769,860

Rating: 4.9244885 out of 5

Keywords: how to, table manners, etiquette, manners, good manners, dining etiquette, proper dining, fine dining, courtesy, dining, gentleman's gazette, english table manners, social etiquette, good manners for children, etiquette expert, etiquette lesson for children, etiquette class, table etiquette, etiquette questions, business etiquette, how to use a napkin, how to hold cutlery, manners and etiquette, dining skills

Id: zA2PfKRcm0g

Length: 11min 51sec (711 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 22 2020