Cousin Got Pregnant With My Husband's Son's Baby & Got Mad I'm Pregnant Too Bc Now I'm Her Stepmom

this is a doozy i 25 already know that my cousin will call her cousin 26 and i are dating two men from the same family last year i married my boyfriend so we'll call him husband 46 and her boyfriend boyfriend 27 i'll be up front and let everyone know that they are father and son i married boyfriend's dad this is half of where the problem started i met my husband through a mutual acquaintance three years ago and we immediately hit it off about a year into his dating i invited my cousin to a party at his house to meet him she was going to be the first in the family to do so this party is where she met boyfriend she told me she was pregnant with boyfriend's baby the day before my husband and i decided to elope i told her over the phone what we were planning and she seemed to sort of panic i didn't understand why and just congratulated her told her i'd love to plan the baby shower and all that if she wanted me to she agreed but harassed me my entire honeymoon telling me i was making a mistake i was too young i barely knew my husband and so on we came home and went to my parents house for a family dinner where we announced that we got married my parents were happy with us my mom made a joke about it being in the jeans because she also married an older man though she was in her 30s so her 22 year age gap was less of a big deal to people and then my cousin told the entire party she was pregnant i was a little upset that she stole that moment but i sucked it up because we eloped for a reason and i figured she deserved a special moment too husband offered to let them stay in our guest house and get ready for the baby whom they accepted and cousin and boyfriend welcomed their son into the world in march this year i planned the baby shower i helped her pick out names and sewed them a cute little yellow and green quilt for the crib cousin and i seemed to be doing better and we were hanging out all the time now comes the doozy i found out i was pregnant in february it wasn't much of a surprise considering i stopped taking my birth control but we were still using protection at the time and had agreed not to start officially trying until after cousin and boyfriend had their baby i didn't tell her right away we didn't tell anyone until it was absolutely the first thing people would notice husband wanted to do it sooner but i didn't want to step on any toes we posted it on instagram and facebook and within an hour they were both banging on the door demanding to know what was going on cousin started screaming and eventually crying telling me i was always doing this to her and that she deserved better i have no idea what she was talking about when i talked to my mom she said we could have waited and been more sensitive to the situation but i have no idea why i should put my life on hold for my cousin my husband and i had a little girl last month i don't think i could love anyone more than i love her but i feel like i'm not allowed to be happy about it am i the idiot for not waiting longer and not giving her more room for her moment edit someone asked in the comments so i'll clarify it here she's saying i purposely got pregnant to steal the spotlight away from her and the newborn you are not the idiot isn't she the one who picked up your boyfriend's son and announced her pregnancy as you announced your marriage projecting much sounds like cousin has huge issues like she's constantly trying to catch up with you be you not sure your husband and you were unkind for not telling his own son that he was having a baby sister super weird for him to find that out on facebook especially in these odd circumstances your stepdaughter-in-law cousin and your stepson were rude to announce her pregnancy at dinner after you just announced your elopement the whole thing is kind of a crap show but you're not an idiot for having a child during their kids first year that's ridiculous your pregnancy was an accident and regardless you shouldn't be expected to plan your pregnancy around them especially given your husband's age he can't wait forever you are not the idiot so i 18 female have had an acne problem since i was a kid one year ago i went to a dermatologist who told me my acne was very mild but he understood that i wanted a clear skin so he prescribed me a skin routine which greatly helped with keeping my acne in check my parents have always had this habit of making comments when i'd get some acne after days of having a clear face oh no you got two new pimples oh my god your skin is so irritated you look awful you should really squeeze that pimple it looks disgusting etc well i've grown sick of these comments i don't have a great family bond and i don't go out of my room often as i don't like being around them but whenever they catch a glimpse of me they will make these comments even encouraging ones get on my nerves your skin looks so clear today i don't care i cannot control it i don't want to be aware of it every time i go out of my room today it's clear tomorrow may not be it's none of your business today my mom did the same thing telling me i had such clear skin that day and after i put makeup on she immediately tells me oh no it's irritated now something snapped and i told her i couldn't understand how they could be so rude and where did they find the audacity to constantly comment on my appearance i was also talking about my dad i told her i was sick of hearing about my skin all the time that i couldn't control it i didn't want an update from her every day because i could see myself in the mirror i then asked how she would feel if i commented on her wrinkles every day she then got defensive telling me it's not the same thing and i was being cruel to even mention something like that i asked her how it was cruel i can't control my acne she can't control her aging and the only difference is that she was hypocritical and entitled i knew my mother had severe issues with the idea of aging and i purposely mentioned it i thought she would get a new perspective because she has never had acne i get it from my dad so she doesn't know how it feels either way she's hurt and not talking to me at all did i go too far i honestly can't tell am i the idiot edit i've tried expressing that the comments make me uncomfortable and set boundaries since forever but in their mind they have a right to as i'm their child it's not uncommon in my country for parents to have this superiority complex but if it hurts them when i do it they should understand that they don't have the right to do it to me either not the idiot everyone has a breaking point there's nothing wrong in calling people out on their crap the comment on her wrinkles was a nice touch though bravo she'll get over it yep she's a hypocrite and she's mad that she got a taste of her own medicine you are not wrong not the idiot your mother is a clear hypocrite if she can't see the parallel between her wrinkles and your acne in this situation they're both skin related afflictions even i feel for you my parents have a similar habit of bringing up my weight every time i see them with similar comments such as oh you're chubbier than the last time i saw you you're going heavy on desserts aren't you and so on and so forth i wish parents would be more sensible towards their children's issues it's not cool to constantly remind a person about their looks when they can hardly have any control over the issue i guess this is the reason most of us end up avoiding maintaining contact whenever possible not trying to offend anybody here i 28 female have a sister who is married to joey thirties male we are not close for unrelated reasons but i recently saw them at a dinner party for the first time in a year for the record the event was for my dad's retirement and was 100 safe joey has recently finished his osteopathy degree and he was going around bragging that we now have to call him dr smith smith is just a placeholder name he and my sister have always been into sketchy and pseudo-scientific health things for example chiropractic and essential oils i judge that kind of thing but i keep my opinions to myself unless asked joey plans to open his own practice in our hometown and employ my sister as a receptionist or office manager when he approached me i congratulated him on his graduation and made some small talk about his school and how it's close to a popular hiking trail i thought we had a nice chat but my sister came up and interrupted i said something like oh i was just telling joey about this great trail joey gave me a dirty look and was like don't you mean dr smith i kind of laughed it off but he wouldn't let it go he kept making little comments for the rest of the night about me and how i'm probably jealous relevant i dropped out of a phd program a while back because i got a fantastic private sector job offer it was the right choice for me and i'm not jealous i'd had enough and i told him that osteopathy was a pseudoscience and i'd never put it on the same level as medicine i shared that in my opinion alternative health can really hurt people and take advantage of folks during the worst times of their life there wasn't much conversation after that so i retreated to the kitchen to help my mother prep dessert joey avoided me after that am i the idiot my family is divided my brother thinks i was right to explain my view but my sister is furious according to my mom [Music] everyone's wrong here he has a doctorate so absolutely he is dr smith that title is given to people with doctorates not just people who are mds medical doctors do's still go to medical school for four years and still have to pass three separate tests you're basically downplaying his accomplishment as for him he's your brother-in-law and i feel like the degree has gone to his head because he got upset you didn't use his title this makes me physically eye roll titles are meant for business or work related reasons not at a party meant for your father's retirement forcing family members to do that is pretty egocentric in my opinion no one wins here edit yes we are in the u.s no i won't tell you what school my brother-in-law went to even though i strongly disagree with the pseudo-scientific aspects of his education i now see that he is a doctor even if he's not a medical doctor i feel so strongly about pseudoscience and alternative medicine because it killed a dear family friend of mine she developed diabetes and tried to treat it with woo instead of medical advice she died almost four years ago but i miss her every day the unrelated reason why my sister and i are estranged she has a pattern of behaving recklessly and destroying my things in high school i worked and saved up for an old beater car she took it without my permission and totaled it then manipulated my parents so she wouldn't have to pay in college she dropped my laptop into a pool for no clear reason the final strike was when she took a bath in my first house left the water running and fell asleep leading to massive water damage i got my kids all their routine vaccines growing up but i was always on the fence whether that was the right thing to do i also used to be completely against the hpv vaccine it's so new that i didn't want my kids to be the guinea pigs all my views on vaccines changed when one of our kittens caught a virus at the vet's office and brought it home to our other cats i literally watched what happens when some are vaccinated and some are not the cats that were vaccinated barely got sick the young ones that weren't vaccinated and were healthy were pretty sick but made it out unscathed the younger ones with health issues and the older ones that weren't vaccinated were in bad shape i even had to hospitalize and then put one down all because i didn't have them all vaccinated yet it was a heartbreaking and eye-opening experience i am now pro-vaccine problem is my husband who's their dad has become so anti-government in the last few years that he's convinced that vaccines are just a money grab they're full of a bunch of unnecessary ingredients and he said something about them putting tracking devices in them i don't know he's just anti-vaccines my daughter hasn't had any boyfriends yet but she's almost adult and the time is nearing so when she asked me about it after a recent doctor appointment i told her it's your body your choice you are old enough now to make your own decisions about your body and your health i recommend you go online and do some research and decide for yourself whether or not to be vaccinated personally i would get it if i were you but that's just me she did the research and decided that she does want the vaccine she asked if i could make her a doctor's appointment to go get it i told her that i believe that we could just go to a pharmacy and get it done there but i'd have to look into it my husband has gotten to the point with his beliefs that we can't even talk anymore like at all we are total opposites on nearly every single issue in the world so if i told him she wanted the vaccine it would certainly cause a huge fight i already have a million things going on and i honestly don't even feel like dealing with telling him but i feel like going behind his back and doing it anyways would be super wrong even though he's lived with me and the kids their whole life and he has been home nearly 24 7 that whole time he hasn't been an involved parent he spends his days and nights either asleep or on his phone which means i've had to play the role of both mom and dad to them so in many ways i feel like they are my kids rather than our kids which is the only reason why i'd even consider getting her vaccinated behind his back but even so it still feels wrong for some reason so would i be the idiot if i got my daughter the hpv vaccine behind her dad's back not the idiot i applaud you for changing your slight anti-vaccine on that one to fully pro-vaccine stance also you are being a responsible and respectful parent allowing your daughter to make up her own mind on that optional vaccine you have every right to want your children to be safe and healthy and lower their risk of disease and the risk of them spreading it to others even if this wasn't an optional choice for your daughter i'd recommend you doing it and wouldn't think you were the idiot for not telling your husband since this is an optional vaccine and since your daughter has asked for it and done her research i would say you would only be one of you denied her this and if you told your husband i think it would cause friction in their relationship so you are doing the right thing i'm confused about why you are with him still if all you do is fight and no longer agree on anything sounds like that's going to cause more problems than getting your kid one vaccine behind his back we've been together since i was very young plus due to some health issues i've never been able to work so i think most of it is just fear if i could find a way to 100 support myself financially it wouldn't be quite so scary my wife of three years 10 years together and have what i think is a solid marriage and intimate life a long time ago she asked me if there were any of our mutual friends i was attracted to i told her that i only had eyes for her she said she was serious and said she wants to know names i refuse to answer she's kept trying to get me to tell her and eventually i broke and said a name she then asked if i would sleep with her i told her of course not she then asked if i would if we weren't married i still said no my wife said i was lying and she kept pushing me to answer otherwise i again just gave up and said sure if i wasn't in love with her i'd sleep with her friend that was the end of the conversation over the last few months the friend has come up in conversation my wife specifically has been comparing herself to her like she'll make a comment on how said friend has a better butt than her or is more well endowed than her i'll always tell her that she's better looking but she won't believe me i get the feeling she's very upset that i said that and is now jealous of her friend because she caught my attention three weeks ago my wife offered to get me and her friend together i was taken aback and asked her what she was talking about she then said she knew i wanted to sleep with her and that i thought she was better looking than her and she would understand and wouldn't care if we slept together once i told her that she was speaking crazily and that i wasn't into her friend she then said that it's not going to hurt her feelings if i am and that she really thinks that i should accept her offer i told her no and she legitimately asked me if i would cheat with her friend i again said no i asked why she wants this she said it wasn't some weird fetish that she just wanted me to be satisfied i told her i couldn't sleep with another woman she had been asking me to do this for a while now and she even told me that the friend is open if i am which bothers me that she told her friend about this she really wants me to do this for some odd reason and isn't letting go i'm tempted just to do it so i don't have to hear it again but i really don't want to sleep with anyone other than my wife but apparently she's all for me banging a friend that she is jealous of this is such a strange situation i'm really at a loss can anyone tell me why she's like this or what i should do no this is some sort of very insecure trap the way she was talking before i don't know sounds bad i think you need to very firmly tell her she needs to stop this get tough it is not all right and it is hurtful to you that she thinks of you this way and is talking to her friend about all of this you feel pushed and pressured and uncomfortable if she is insecure she needs to learn to deal with those issues and stop projecting them onto you in crazy ways therapy really because this is pretty crazy sounds like she's trying to deal with her insecurity by proving it right not good to sum this up you gave in to tell her a name and regret it you gave in to telling her that you would have intimacy with her if dot dot dot and you regret it what do you think will happen now if you give in to having intimacy with that woman don't do that instead have a serious conversation with your wife and be stern that she tells you why she is so interested in you sleeping with another woman there's a reason for her request and it surely as hell is not that she wants to see you satisfied if she feels insecure about herself then you sleeping with another woman will only make it worse if it's not a kink it sounds like a test the second one could be entirely possible i thought i would have passed the test when i said i didn't find her friends attractive but she kept pushing and i just gave answers to get her off a topic she wouldn't let go [Music] you

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Keywords: askreddit, r/askreddit, reddit, askwomen, reddit women, askreddit real voice, reddit stories, justnomil, r/aita, r/tifu, reddit cousin, reddit announce pregnancy, reddit pregnant, reddit stepmom, reddit son in law, reddit daughter in law

Id: F2sQqbtjJ3o

Length: 18min 47sec (1127 seconds)

Published: Sat Apr 10 2021