Confronting My Body-Shaming Sister-In-Law! | KARAMO

foreign who say they haven't spoken in two years and now need my help Carla is married to shaylee's brother Jeremy she says Shaylee has never accepted her into the family and Shaylee is here and we will hear her side of the story later but first I want to welcome Carla Carla come on out how are you doing well don't you look fabulous you do too thanks for having me nice to meet you come on all right now so tell me Carla why are you not speaking to Shaylee so first of all I don't trust Shaylee trying to talk with her um so there's a lot that that goes behind that so let me take you on that experience yeah of what exactly happened so um to start things off with um Shaylee and me uh we went out to eat and I was feeling under the weather so I got a soup and so she started questioning me asking me like what do I eat it made me feel uncomfortable it made me question my body and then later on I found out that she would go behind my back and ask my husband what do I eat would if I work out how often I work out sorry this is hard no I didn't talk about all of this because it was like the whole thing about it is it made me question my body the way she handled all of it yeah um so and she was rude to you that first time outside of just questioning your body tell me more about that yeah so um so after that whole experience I had learned to find out that she had asked my husband who I was dating at the time if I was a virgin so she would ask very personal questions and I didn't like it so I would tell my husband how I felt and so my husband thought it was a good idea to reach out to her and say hey you need to say sorry to Carla I personally never needed a fake apology from her but she messaged me and she's like hey Jeremy told me that this is bothering you and I was like yeah of course like why are you gonna ask my husband these personal questions about me yeah and talk about your body which is the big one yeah yeah I asked her I was like why did you ask this and she got very defensive and she started throwing like Bible scriptures at me saying that I'm not a Christian she knew nothing about me ever um for her to like throw these assumptions about me so I want to know how has Shaylee talking about your weight and asking these personal questions affected your relationship not only with her brother who's your husband but also the rest of the family counters I've had with her because I didn't want them to see her in a negative light but she did the complete opposite she started telling everybody that I'm this terrible person and I'm sure other things that you know I know nothing about that she's told them I know this because she they started like messaging my husband saying you shouldn't be with her on our engagement night her husband messaged the group chat when we're all celebrating with my friends and family saying you guys shouldn't be together no one likes Carla you shouldn't be with her and so it really like kind of like downplayed our whole engagement party because we were just trying to celebrate and enjoy our time together so so my producers told me that you said that you and Shaylee have different opinions about body positivity what do you mean by that um so I'm actually learning a lot about body positivity and I'm learning that I am for body positivity but what I'm not for is a toxicity behind it that's what I'm not for so then why do you do you feel like Shaylee is hiding behind the body positivity movement do you think she's toxic when it comes to that um here's one example um she has said on several occasions referring to as skinny people or straight sized people where um you know are this and she kind of Compares and so I don't think that's fair because you're skinny does not mean you don't have curves I think everybody's shape has turned I think sometimes when we talk about body positivity we only think of someone who might be of larger sizes there's different ways we see our bodies no matter how it looks and you have to love your your body at any state so do you believe this relationship can be fixed between you two I don't know per K the last straw for me she had questioned me and this was the last time we went out to eat together she started asking me if I'm legal if my parents are legal and you know I'm a first generation American so for me that was super sensitive topic and I wasn't like trying to make a big deal out of it but I went home and my dad had like a noticeable accent so I asked him he's been in the USA for over 50 years so I asked him has anybody asked you if you're illegal if you're a citizen of the USA and he said Carla that's a really weird question nobody should ever ask that and then that got me thinking I was like she's she's asking these questions not to like get to know me because she's never said hey Carla what do you do for fun hey Carla let's uh let's you know meet up and go out to eat since you're in town and she's she's never made that effort and when I try to be a grown adult and tell her hey you know like this is what bothered me let's fix it she started getting defensive and telling me that I wasn't Christian I wasn't this I wasn't that and I even gave her my phone number and I said you know what just call me so we can fix this yeah and she never did let's meet Carla's sister-in-law and hear what what she has to say Shaylee come on out how you doing nice to meet you you look beautiful thank you both of y'all just today I met you yes you do all right so Shaylee we heard what Carla has to say she said that basically there's issues because in a sense you're bullying her about her body in a sense you're also bullying her about where her family comes from what is your perspective on that I wish this was a common conversation that we could have had on our own together but I had reached out multiple times to you and I remember one specific time when you came into town I said hey can we meet up for coffee it's really important for me to have a good relationship with my brother and it would mean so much to me if you could tell me what I've done to you because you were telling my whole family I did something that you couldn't forgive me for and I didn't know what that was I never said that I never once said I couldn't forgive you because your mom told your bro told my husband that I didn't forgive you like saying that I hate you and all these things I said where are these words coming from I never once said that and you never have I never have this this text message saying that you want to go out with me to begin with I think I have the the right upper hand to say like I tried to have this adult conversation with you and you got very defensive and I didn't know what else to do I said why am I gonna have this conversation again is it because I'm married to your brother Shaylee do you have a problem with Carla being married to your brother I do not have a problem with Carla being married to my brother because I want my brother to be happy I am however very sad because since the beginning of them being together my relationship with my brother has dissipated and I wish that I could State my side to everything that was claimed here but I have a whole completely different side I have a different story so then what are your issues with Carla you tell me from the beginning I've tried to be friends with you I've tried to have some kind of connection with you I remember the very first time where you had complimented my brother and said how great of a husband he was and how awesome of a person he was again we're married and and you right and I said and I said I agree Jeremy's awesome and then I found out leader that you were offended by that because I didn't say anything about you but I didn't know you that wasn't that okay well that was the first anything about that okay no that was the first issue and then I feel like things got brought up to me later on the whole conversation that we had where I asked if you were legal that has been stretched to a different proportion you were talking about your fa you were talking about your family in Peru no no no no no no no no no you don't ever ever ask somebody if they're legal okay [Applause] you can do that but that is not okay context is important in this conversation and let me say why because you were talking about your family in Peru and you were saying how they wanted to come to this country and they wanted to become legal citizens because I never said that I never this was that conversation my family is they do have a citizenship where they can come so you're I think you're remembering things wrong so I want to hear about it we clearly have two different sides because I want to know so what she did say as well is that you were shaming her about her body yeah and I do not even remember that conversation I would literally my entire message I'm a body positive plus size fashion YouTuber my entire message my entire message is about loving our bodies as they are I would of course I would never purposely ever purposefully hurt somebody in that way ever and I'm sorry like I really I really am sorry that you felt that way I wish that you would have like said it in that moment like hey when when you say that that means that but I had no idea sometimes the thing was we were married at the time and you started asking him questions um does Carla work out what does she eat I don't remember asking these questions okay but do you realize when you ask these questions it makes me question my own body how are you gonna how are you gonna make someone feel that way and then have the nerve to be a body positive influencer and I agree with you Haley my producers Haley my producers told me that you said that sometimes you've been discriminated against yes have you ever been shamed by Carlo second-handedly I guess yeah I mean there was a public figure that had made a video um basically bashing plus size people and the body positive community and I had conviction in my heart to make a video about it so I posted a video and all I'm doing in this video as you can see is like rubbing my stomach and embracing my body for what it is because I'm proud of myself like it's taken me a very very long time to get to a place where I am and happy with myself I took a long time and you made me relive a trauma that I wasn't meant to I'm really sorry I literally I want to know what happened though when you said you posted you posted this video in response to this person who made a video and then you said I'm loving myself and then what happened and then this person who has millions of followers actually made a response to me was not expecting it at all but it happened and I was scrolling my phone and all of a sudden I was hit with thousands and thousands and thousands of comments messages all of these you have to worry about getting kidnapped we don't want to oh stop shaming comments like tons and tons and tons of fact so what did Carla do in that moment she had liked that person's post yeah and my my my response to that was I have tried so hard and my and my side I feel like I have tried so hard I can't hide that because you nonchalantly just said yes you liked a post yeah I did but it pain and hurt right she's getting attacked online we all know that can feel like yeah why would you then like it because I was hurt hurt people hurt I get that but but that still doesn't make it right no it was wrong because the thing is she's trying to own up to her behavior and saying like I'm sorry and and from my perspective because I'm on the outside and you ask for my help it seems like you don't want to hear her and so what I really do want to start and I think a great baby step is to at least apologize to each other for shaming each other on that body you've made comments about how she was she was eating that made her feel uncomfortable and you like the post when she's being bullied about her body online so can you both apologize to each other for that and allow that to be the first step I'm sorry I'm I didn't realize I appreciate that I didn't realize I hurt you like that okay and never do that on purpose thank you that means a lot that means a lot I appreciate that I'm really sorry that what I did hurt you and I didn't mean it to hurt you I'm so sorry I really wish I didn't do that thank you it's going to be baby steps for you because there's pain that you were experiencing from before and you just have to now acknowledge it and not minimize it and I think if you all can start doing that you can start taking the steps to move forward and be healthier as sisters yeah because I do believe she wants to be in your life I know it's going to be hard for you to believe and so I'm not forcing you to believe now but I do believe it yeah of course foreign [Applause] for the first time today I think a little bit right yeah hold on where you going I'll tell you where you're going right here to subscribe and right here to watch more period foreign

Channel: Karamo Show

Views: 92,280

Keywords: Karamo

Id: 0vJN4xMpna8

Length: 14min 26sec (866 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 21 2022