cedric the entertainer presents

from Hollywood California it's Cedric the Entertainer presents with Amy Morrison Shaun Majumder Jamie smooth Wendy Raquel Robinson and the beautiful sensation dancer ladies was 30 I know I fell doing I came out I know y'all thought I was just about to Riverdance and something just be fool around and figure skate up in his room you know brothers figure skating that much good you see yeah I'm you know and I was feeling good I was feeling sharp not a shot I see some brothers in here real clean this brother back there all white on shabd at first day of school clean though you know be able to somebody house eating barbecue like welcome to my new show this is Cedric the Entertainer presents what we're doing here you can see it's a big old school live variety show a lot of comedy a lot of music beautiful dancing ladies these are the kind of ladies that danced in college study dance not dance to pay their way to college okay and stanlon saying so keep your singles dog eyes I got a lot of new fans now - lot of the people who start to know who I am people come up and they'll they know my face not not quite the name you know you're cute Cecily interrogator I like your nose tumors ball you shake up the beer good deal we got a great show we want y'all to enjoy yourself come on watch the show women hola and welcome to que hora s the Mexican soap opera for people who only had three weeks of Spanish in the fourth grade k-ras Oh Joe donde esta la biblioteca your no say yo no se Lunas Martez miércoles wave Feliz Navidad que hora llamo Derek dos coca-cola's palpable una cerveza para me Macarena I'm mucho tacos in the echo No boy oh it's muy deliciosa tres cuatro Cinco seis seis Lana ta keo carport amor por que siempre star a a lado - yo soy una parte de T nunca master and owner a sin t hey como se D say chill chill espanol yeah uh he's uh ha safe Rio has a free oh yeah yeah Frio partner que les you know como se llaman still be my Oh baby hey ustedes no habla espanol ce que hora s join us next week for more K or s when the healthy boost trike grannies tasty apple juice great we'll get back with you I was the last guy that was the last time all right so what do you guys think we ought to go in nice white wine aside about to be over I'm velvet Anderson this here's my girl Lolita and together with jingle feet but but we are actually out of it whatever we're not writing jingles we're working for singles down at the Third Street Promenade but you know what I think that's great but you don't have an appointment so I think you should leave oh come on now foxy mama give us struggling musician opportunity to turn let's move out oh boy sounds about with you let me hear say ah all right you got two minutes that's all we need to drop a sweet jangle on your head new apple juice jangle their car never knew you girl he never gave me a true I will drink your juice you know if there's one thing I know white folks like more than apple juice is Skinnygirl singing about pain and no lying alone that one actually we were looking for something a little bit more upbeat so we got something so upbeat is down here come planet I'll thank you tie stop breakage oh stop it was really nice actually we're looking for something a little younger young bee Oh I think that's it like you should make the call I think I should security that's our time for now we go get on out of here oh by the way through y'all validate now you bad you bad got 184 miles everybody get hold of one let me give you some extra mashed potato thanks cafeteria lady this misses cafeteria later Nathaniel okay unlike your mamas almost know how to keep a loose then let me give you some green beans cuz you need your vitamin I don't want you to grow up and be short like your rear dad yeah I think I'm gonna have some of those green beans too ain't no mo green bean there's mashed potato than corn ain't got the sense God gave a goat I can see the green beans right there I can see them young green beans for a cherry but you need is some mashed potatoes and corn to absorb some of that alcohol you've been drinking between classes come up here drunk as cooter brown here I brush them floss this morning how could you possibly know that cuz I'm the cafeteria lady I know everything now out there you might be a big math teacher or whatever in here you a substance abuser that can counter Tinian that's all you no no I'm a cup of coffee I'm hot black and strong today well I say they a lot like that dress you got on too small and recently picked up off the float you know what cafeteria lady I told myself that you aren't gonna get to me today I'm sorry you're so angry at the world but me in the world are just fine I'll be fine if I got freaky with the world every time my husband went out of town to hide you know that your federal you know what bitter would see yeah that's right that's right I'm a bicycle with the seat off I didn't you who you on the new gym teacher damned you ugly so what I guess they have you to make the meatloaf look good I never mind my Maris i'm so cruel ah ha what did this poor sweet woman ever do to you look I heard she was tough I'm just trying to get the first shot in oh you wanna take shots did you shot at me huh she going out the dome what happened why you ain't buff on her Oh flat-chested gym teacher I know she was a man or woman award just got me all confused I couldn't getting out of my insults out that's all right James you get some information on her cuz I'm gonna tell her ass up tomorrow oh yeah yeah I'm Colonel Sanders with attitude I Britt slap you okay you have a chair dance hey let's get a chair there's going y'all get it laughs oh did I rock what huh no huh y'all hug y'all put your seat belt on put your seat belt on y'all watch this then Janet Jackson now Britney Spears go freestyle y'all channel 6 Action News with your anchors Donald Blom Reagan's Cindy Jackson and with traffic tah-dah hi I'm Cindy Jackson and I'm Donna blue three gay our top story tonight let's bring your kids to work day across the metro area that's right Donald and it's really been a lot of fun for my little ones who are right here in the studio with us and for the staff here at channel 6 you said it Cindy it's been a blast even though I don't have children because I'm a bachelor in other news tragedy today as the 4th Street food bank burned to the ground there were no injuries but the estimated loss is two million dollars Cindy well that certainly is hard warming a new library open today on Main Street get off of that this is the city's fourth library the hours are from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. and Donald that should allow a lot of time for learning learning indeed Cindy Donald speaking of learning Cindy two burglars learned that crime doesn't pay as police foiled a burglary at Wally's pawn shop on Elm Street all of the stolen items were recovered Cindy Kishan and Sonny okay in other news the Fed will raise interest rates in response to the latest on a blunder get that are down for a happy scent this cleaning Cindy and now let's go to traffic with Tom Phillips and copter six dammit I don't have time for this I'm working like that that's oh mama what we not together anymore she said what Oh glob our job right now I think I feel like those banks we have now breaking news let's go live to this police shootout drop your weapon counseling is not gonna work well it better work Ted because this is our last chance huh well who is this guy means diplomas are all printed on velvet leaves when I was making love to a beautiful woman not once not twice but three times then completely lost track of time now how can I help you frankly the problem is that Ted wants his mother to move in with us she's my mother okay the only other options to put in her nursing home and you know what man stop right there what I think you both are forgetting is that love is and was and never more shall be you can't stop love because what it is just is and it's everywhere is your voice coming out of this speaker yes I enjoy hearing myself talk it relaxes me do you mind if I add a little more bass yeah sure you right so how are we gonna get Ted's mother into a nursing home over my dead body Ted what are you you're a man and what are you Stacy a woman right oh and a man was made to love his woman dead and a woman to love a man and Stacy knows what I'm saying I have to say I don't I see then let me break it down for you like this what's going on I'm about to solve all of your problems kid why don't you hold it oh the time yeah yeah yeah something's definitely working love is working Ted and it's a full-time job with benefits the love takes time you got to heat up the oven before you put in the bread Stacy knows what I'm saying I do show you around love is for ever never never more grab her take her hand me her to the promised land and you oh hey whoa Oh Oh chill look here you two I want you to fill out the medical claim leave your 250 dollar deductible in the nightstand Matteo BlueCross I'm treating you for chronic headaches and I want everybody everywhere to start giving you love everybody in the audience if you hit home alone love yourself love yo sound the time has come for me to go I've had so much fun entertaining yo til the next time or maybe the next show I'll see you when I see you Hollywood California it's Cedric the Entertainer presents we may Mira said Shawn adjuster JB smooth Willie Raquel Robinson and the beautiful sensation dancers lady Lomond more the sensations instead first there the girl someone welcome back to the show welcome back I'm having a good time everything's going well I just cashed my first check so you know trying to get life off of me a little bit I paying my student loans off you know as I've had since 83 giving them later look $20 a month you know and trying to pay the whole thing 20 that's what y'all said y'all wanted this you know it's good you know the fame starting to come you know people starting to start the little scandals in the rumors and I'm concerned about that but it's necessary it's good to have a good scandal good rumor cuz I want my e true Hollywood story to be off the chain you know we all good woman so all the bad rumors y'all nothing bout me and some interns or so Hollywood hookers I y'all saw me woke up naked and somebody baby pool or something good rumors I want y'all to help me I'll just start I'm like tomorrow go to work you know like you know I heard Beyonce stalking say that's a good rumor right there so you just caught that with for me that we just get that one going around you know like I heard saying knock Lennox Lewis so hard he lost his accent ain't bad rumor right there now her say toe shoes nahi kisses hey there's a bad rumor right here oh sorry star whose garden hey we got a great show for y'all y'all check this out come on with me and now cooking with Chef revered please God and good cooking our recipe this morning comes from the book of Crocker Betty Crocker deacon if you will chapter 14 recipe 12 Cheese Souffle hmm ingredients butter eggs G stuff right there butter eggs and G butter eggs Ichi now the Apostle Betty gives us the ingredients well I remember when I was young in the ways of cooking brother Deacon I was headstrong I would give the ingredients and just uh it's out there y'all why does my souffle take so Nast like foolish pride right and God would call me up often he would call me he would say Cletus nationai reto pull mixture in pan and heat at 300 degrees well for 15 minutes come on VOD 15 minutes yeah I know what's going on in some of y'all's kitchen Oh temptation start creepy that was is always working always saying you can do it fast you can do it easy yeah what am I talking about yo the microwave is the devil's box use a microwave no with Chef Boyardee use microwave with Emeril Lagasse BAM lord have mercy using my voice no rat Baca use microwave anyway what a microwave makes such a divine blessing got to tell y'all one thing all wait wait loving me join us next week as we prepare our delicious baby Jesus back ribs right back yeah and welcome back everybody it's open bar here now my man called in sick but I got it hey how's everybody this section doing y'all good yeah meanwhile y'all check this out good we're betting at the 73rd annual Calcutta Golf Classic where Tiger Woods and David the ball are going head-to-head in the competition is really heating up who sure this happened I tell you so my guys who it's a hot one today I don't know Sun is really coming down app you look so so cool as a cucumber rush Vijay Singh with the sand wedge from the deep rough and he's only down by one stroke yes two strokes if you come to when I'm going to have him deserve like I am cooking oh that shot is up and down Vijay will be happy with that one Russ you not feel it okay gave it the ball now David Duval now getting ready to charity Oh Oh looks like he's pulled out on the ball is headed for the water that's boys in water nice who'll watch if I wish I was that ball right now I tell you it's nice and cool like a little fish in food HAP I can't feel my leg you're absolutely right Raj take the ball is any deep trouble now well it appears round she's dead don't go in we'll be right back after these messages oh I think that one likes you thank you slur ting with me are even it'll fit yeah you know I'm flirting with you holla back hey what's up dawg ain't seen you around here yeah what are you what am i I just got here I could tell judging by your bullet head it must have been a natural birth yeah I don't know what happened I was swimming it was dark and then I was pushed there's a bright light no like you you up here I need you down here all right I'm Malik seven pounds let mouses this here train your preemie hey it's not the size of the diaper baby is how you fill it so are those your parents that's Ted your mama look like you got a nice set of milk cart hey hey oh come on man we baby quit acting all like a little fetus you guys know a lot how long have you been here I just got out of my anchor baby I'm just kicking her here until I make four pounds is that your dad huh oh not it's just some security dude you sure don't cuz he looking at you like he know you damn we pull I think he looks nice you better get home look at that brother cuz you won't be seeing him again got tubes coming out of me I ain't got no daddy oh I'm gonna tell I'm going to jail it's alright man it's all right it's all cool you can come play with me right here I got a tricked-out nursery waiting on me I've got my career I'm sitting on boobs Oh oh that sounds great I want to come over I'm gonna come over we're gonna play whoa slow your roll I just met you though you know what what's with the attitude all right you know hey you're right man I mean you know I just got a little flash a diaper rash you know so but there ain't no room for player-hating so you steal my number-one rattle boo hmm it's all good dawg hiko somebody they want to take us to get a circumcision play like you sleep hey my man could you do me a favor and pass this note down to the guy on the end I see obviously you're meant to watch this No do I live with it is so wonderful when two ugly people find each other the room look like Joe Frazier with grit Birds dr. bride oh what a pretty little clown uh what somebody gave you the wrong shoes baby I wasn't dreaming aina moll green beans his mashed potatoes and corn now go ahead and wipe the makeup off or you get kidnapped by Mexican circus oh hello Reverend your sermon was so beautiful and so alone well I had intended to press Reverend Reverend Lord Jesus come on man I cannot handle another sermon right now then will it be mashed potatoes a call I was told let be salmon oh you mean lightly poached in a lemon dill reduction sauce served on a bed of risotto garnish with capers and rosemary sprigs ooh that sounded licious animal just mash potatoes and corn well I don't like mashed potatoes all corn well I don't like that you use tide money to get your wife new breasts yeah I'm all over the what listener would okay right I'm like on pay electric bill I put your lights out James's mother - bride oh you must be so proud your daughter finally married when those means to me and she had sex with yes some of the guests have complained that the menu items we requested aren't available but what about the eggplant parmesan well we made that last night a couple of squirrels ate it but will that mean even well then I'm going to want my money back ain't no mo money just mashed potatoes and corn you'll hear from my lawyer oh wait 10 minutes you'll hear from my food that's right I'm a thoroughbred in a donkey race hobby chance cafeteria lady I just want to thank you so much for catering our wedding well thank you baby so does when white mean some different nowadays um well I think we're ready for our cake James bring that cake out mashed potatoes and corn well look I'm like a double shot of Novocain I ain't really feeling for you you're listening to Tom lupus and Phyllis morning mayhem all right we are back here on morning mayhem and I am of course joined by Phyllis now Phyllis I understand you went on a date last night yeah really yeah we went to dinner and now did you do the dirty deed I am NOT going to answer that that means you did stop it good that's up when you sit through your date Oh coming up to the top of the hour and in the studio right now we're being joined by our brand-new award-winning anchorman give it up for good morning thank you very much our top story today Jim hang on Jimmy who are you saying there Jim I was about to read the news team is at you again yeah there's buddy buddy barks yeah I get it hey Jill how about this would you do Phyllis excuse me look at that rack Tim they're right here I have a rack Mexican President Vicente Fox declared okay why are you doing that because you said Mexican well it's totally inappropriate tell me about a ship on this Mexican food get it's in the beans the President of Mexico declared a state of emergency due to extensive flood damage many residents were forced from their homes and relocated here by centers completely journalists understand j/o the a journalist two things are gonna happen here you do your thoughts I'll read the news and when I leave you can go back to go see buddy okay President of Mexico the time has come for me to go I've had so much fun entertaining yow till the next time or maybe the next show I'll see you when I see you from Hollywood California it's Cedric the Entertainer presents with Amy Morrison Shaun Majumder JB smooth Willy Raquel Robinson and Amina bulls they should dancers the lovely sensations y'all perfectly all right we are celebrating Halloween around his Halloween time for goblins and ghouls you know the thing is as I've gotten older I realize these low you know things don't scare me like they used to Jason Friday 13 ain't scared of that kind of stuff no more you know what scare me dog you know what scares me now they prostate exam they're good that glove right there who won't scare me it's going to the new guy at the barbershop then stay right there I'll cut you up saying let me faint you know what's scaring me walking in the house and my wife got this look on her face you know hey tonight is the big Halloween Day Parade down in West Hollywood we have our man Raj bender at the scene we want to go and talk to him Raj how you doing brother uh well I tell you journeys getting hot down here at Santa Monica Farm where everybody is celebrating the big Halloween Day party and I tell you the costumes are incredible you know Raj you know this is a very big event for the gay community in LA here tell me what percentage of the crowd would you say is gay and what percentage would be non gay people just having a good time showing support uh well you know what I'm I'm not really getting much of a gay vibe I mean the very festive very colorful but I wouldn't say gay at all you've got the gay thing wrong see hello cutie-pie oh he's hands are inordinate Roz bender we'll check back in with him a little later y'all meanwhile y'all watch this John amen hope you don't have first-day jitters no ready to go man okay good now just remember this is a 50s themed diner so try to keep that 50 state of mind with all that dialogue and the fun all right sir I am a classically trained actor watch as I bring the 50s to life before your very eyes great well that's your first station so let's get to work 50s 50s Oh boss sling use a whole so hope you find some you like this I'm sorry I I didn't understand what you said oh so my book learnin ain't so good on the [ __ ] I ain't never sleep the books they say seat I don't know I uh you know listen uh if you well if you just look at us maybe you could take our order oh no sir no sir I really got my eyes out with a butter knife then you look at okay scuse me gonna get a few millions over here what is still doing in here these tables is for white folk going oh you must be one knows up in a Negros Lucknow these APIs is good wait what are you doing fool I'm trying to save a life now come on back out in the alley I'll sneak you some food John what's going on yeah just trying to get the color folk to the back what you see what are you doing this is a 50s diner not roots I'm just trying to stay true to the era look I know that you're an actor but just tone it down a bit have a little self-respect and dignity oh you mean more late 50s oh hi is everything okay everything is fine sir good well I think we're ready to order we're gonna have a couple of cheeseburgers fries and two cherry cokes what now I will not get your cheeseburger nor your prize all your cherry coke I am more than a serve a white man I am a man they call me mr. Tibbs maybe I'm not being cool this is supposed to be fun fine what no black people having fun in the fifties I don't think it was one black person having a good time self a little rich it and ain't trying to have it kind of way okay okay I'll tell you what let's pretend that you've never heard of the 50s okay you're from another planet I don't know just serve food that's all you want to do is serve food got it got it thank you oh well look who's back where's our burgers what our burgers was my robot from the grip no that was great I really liked that I really thought those that was great you're fired get out coming right back y'all you having a good time you're feeling good well aware of gold that's height a little bit right here yeah massage would be nice wouldn't it that would be now I can make that happen okay yeah hmm I feel good doing it and what I can do hey meanwhile let's check in with our man Raj at the parade Rajah Zagora Oh Raj is kicking it Amy oh man meanwhile y'all check this out this is nice we're just the cutest little things I have ever seen yes you are yes you are don't get no cuter baby you like it when I smiled like that belch that's my new thing I've been working on Wow that's the fifth woman to come up to us this morning hey dot why you acting all surprised man we huge at this park man we like b2k at this park wait till we start recognizing shape that's gonna be off the hook I'm gonna be like that's like square it's a triangle as a circle I'll learn all my shapes oh ho it's gonna be bananas Wow Trey you look great how much do you weigh now I'm up to 9 pounds and six love it all Hey what you've been eating dog I mean breast the bottom mostly pool a beer and something called government cheese see that's your problem right there my breastfeeding is where is that it's like nature's krysta peekaboo Wow did you see that I made that woman disappear oh man it's called object permanence she behind our head fool you ain't David Copperfield Wow how do you guys know all this stuff I'm really bad so my nanny says so nanny all that lady who shakes you hey hey what's this I don't know man you have to put it in your mouth see if you can eat now you know baby we're acting all prenatal you weren't scared sure I was scared man I'm scared of a lot of things you know point is you can't show fear it's time for everybody to baby up against the world dog yeah I mean I am in Oh lies baby life like my daddy got you with bean time I'm too baby oh that's that I never mama catch you my children the end of the world is upon us in mere seconds the universe will vaporize and the Galactic being baltra will take us away in his spaceship he'll Batra the end will come in five four three two one well hey guys Elsa mmm that was a close one guess Balrog changed his mind you know he's like that sometimes so that's it no no apocalypse well looks like that's it duh you're right um I'll see everybody at the temple on Saturday are you kidding me I quit my job for this I gave my children away look man I didn't tell you to do that I said lay off the girls a little bit me you're a tree to a whole nother level because I believed in you you brought us to this mountain for nothing hey hey hey come on guys you're looking at this all wrong no end of the world yeah we're go celebrate I just got my pizza come on who's got a cellphone we want our lives back I want my pants back you had sex with my wife this whole last month hey that was her idea the world was anything I never had a black man I used to be a black man you're a lawyer Oh oh hey do you want to know why broach I didn't come it's because you have no faith and it's that kind of negativity that keeps the end of the world away okay all right all of you get on your knees and put your hands down to the ground and ash brought our to forgive you for all this slippy stuff come on let's do it come on yeah it's brought you our forgive us come on give us son of a [ __ ] let's check back in with my man Roz bender at the grave rods are you doing you having a good time you know why alcohol not my friend nope and I think I kissed a man on the mouth but other than that I've had a very good time yes Roz bender ladies and gentlemen y'all give it up for y'all watch this this is beauty she says her husband changed after they were married he's become lazy and refuses to get a job this is the beast he says she's straight up tripping and he's not giving her jack let's get ready for another edition of divorce porn Beauty and the Beast why do you want a divorce beauty because Your Honor he is not the man that I married okay he's like hey you selfie hi hey cheated on me okay to make matters worse hey still not housebroken hey I'll go on paper I'd go on the pokeo beast you'll get your turn to talk he never got a job like he said he would okay he just sits at the house all day but other in the neighbor's cat chews up all my shoes hands all over the place I'm a beast Jana okay I'm a beast that's what I do okay she knew this when she met me now says you got a problem with it if you lay down with the beach you're bound to come up with fleas one please for me now you say you're divorcing him because he's lazy and destructive and a cheatin dog ain't no dog don't call me no dog do not disrespect my people like this you act like a dog you're gonna be a piece you're gonna recognize I'm Abby I'm from Long Beach okay I know dog right your honor you write such a mouth accent I won't get a job well nobody trying to hire no beasts right now for nothing your honor the man that I married okay he may have been a beast but he was romantic he used to run me poetry to get me flowers and now I hate doesn't that guy is an ugly poem beasts yes hear your side of the story all right I'll tell you okay all right I'm gonna tell me please no I'm gonna say I'm gonna let you know ideas real you know Sam I don't know it's there but I'd like to know we we furs hair hair start dating I promised her Castle hey you know I used to talk more like this you know darling the flowers that you have their game I had game but you know we marry now you know and you and you know I can't keep all that up too beautiful please Beauty left you 20 years ago okay they should call us cute from a distance and the beasts a cheat on us you can use a little Mac lip gloss and take my day they why call us your sister a little bit cuter than you okay now after all you're not Denzel or something yeah you hurt my feelings no I know I look good for a beat so what help get smart then fine Beauty what do you want from this court the trailer and all the furniture the court ruled in favor of beauty and this case is adjourned oh hell no please do some right here if I write that what you lookin at man the time has come for me to go I had so much fun entertaining yow till the next time I may be the next you I'll see you when I see you Hollywood California it's Cedric the Entertainer presents with Amy Brissette Shaun Majumder JB smooth we'll be Raquel Robinson sensation dancer Zelda see relax a little bit gonna be here for me hey y'all doing I'm feeling good that was nice see that was all good right there all good men without one it's all good that used to be afraid it's all good though people used to use that when he wouldn't even right you know they hear my little cousin just got locked up man you got to do 15 years but it's all good no player that is not all good situation right there y'all like when people use terms like that all out of order you know like the new one is player-hating you know you you a hater are you hating why you playing minute use it all wrong like man I'm Rob just dude man jacked him and took his car man go call the police on me why you gotta hate on me like that words words or something you just can't throw around you know P week trying to say words they can't say n start in on them had to back up and go another way right like what I was looking at that that is ridiculous that is rethinking that's crazy y'all a high-crime man we got a great show hola and welcome to que Ras the Mexican soap opera for people who only had three weeks of Spanish in the fourth grade Kaori señorita Becky como esta usted gracias Tito Senor Todd donde esta el aeropuerto fire con Dios menudo Marty Oh Manuel II wife you la Bamba two seconds no Rico suave Roberto durán new boss Oh me casa su casa Alison Cooper Chihuahua they talked no no and Chihuahua the [ __ ] Grande Santa Barbara Santa Maria Santa Claus STD ah no puede terminar Kamiya more tenemos que dar gracias a diós que podemos vivir sin miedo pero si te casa con el me rompers el corazon spent alone sorry I no comprendo el hambre poquito word is chips and salsa baby Wow hmm join us next week for more gay Laura s darling I must say that you really look fabulous tonight oh that is so sweet of you thank you I am so glad you finally unblocked my phone number why did we ever break up anyway huh Oh cash look why don't you just ask Gina Shantay right my bad that's all behind us now I mean I'm taking you to see Lord of the Rings that should let you know I'm serious right there okay Cassius you know what I'm gonna go get our seats why don't you just get me a Pellegrino okay honey this is not the symphony weird urban Magic Johnson's theatres hey doll get a cup of water puts him out cos L see no Wisner you said you cash hey hey what's up Tanisha are you doing ain't seen you in a while no since we hooked up at ray Ray's barbecue pool party yeah yeah that was why so uh I know you not here to see Lord of the Rings nobody I know gonna see these little tiny people bus of Captain so flying monkey eggs be a snoop and Cuban deader than a mug this movie off the heezy for sheezy nothing why don't you come with me Cash's come on the movie started Cassius right I see you got you some filet mignon Cassius but you know sooner lady you gonna want this here fried chicken Queens and thighs I'll be sure to bring the hot sauce golly this is just what I'm talking about man ain't there no black hobbits in Hollywood can you believe that guy oh dude lives in the ground but you know what I think is messed up do-rag wearing thugs who act ignorant in a theater Shh maybe it's not a do-rag maybe he's getting his chemo on no deader than a mug he's whack of in a mug you've got a pic once smoke we don't make movies honey are we in your house you know you were probably confused cuz the floors are a little sticky actually I have a shag rug in my bedroom you can act your man by day Cassius what is this ghetto hoochie talking about ghetto won't you everybody needs to calm down I'm trying to watch the movie is it's good Donatella Cassius look Tanisha and I used to kick it when we were broke up didn't mean anything have you been tested I would not use a bank pen after you no you didn't go there on my hygienic bring it out Oh and I wouldn't break it up but you got to admit this better than the movie now mr. burrows mr. dietrick I must once again remind you you are under oath can you please tell us what your titles are at the amalgamated Candy Company hmm we're food additive experts I see now what exactly does that mean um we're we're responsible for adding flavoring to candy okay now I understand that the both of you were in charge of the candy in question killer sour mamas yes and you do realize that 15 people died as a result of eating this candy yes did either of you test this product on yourselves before releasing it to the market yes and what happened I passed now what about you mr. dietrick uh the same but for a lot lot longer perhaps you could tell me what ingredient generally is used by candy manufacturers to make candy sour tartaric acid okay and and how much tartaric acid is usually used in one box of sour candy uh about ten milliliters and how much sir Tariq acid did you use in killer sour Mama's in one box yeah uh what's the thing above milliliters uh centiliters and what's the thing about that leaders yeah twelve of those you're telling me that you used over 100,000 times the recommended amount of tartaric acid yes why um because we're monsters you're monsters I'm sorry could you rephrase the question you're you're you're telling me you're monsters yes yes do either of you have any remorse for what has happened here um yes uh no all right then it is my recommendation that killers our mamas be discontinued effective immediately and that both of you be brought to trial for murder now do you have anything to say would you like some candy and now cooking with Chef Reverend our recipe today comes from the book of open-pit you can read from in chapter 14 recipe to spicy barbecue sauce oh wow ingredients brown sugar now huh molasses Wow wall chest assistances since I saw brown sugar molasses and now I know Worcester dishes for signature size now the ingredients are clear are they not yet the temptation starts to creeping yeah and you want to put in all kinds of crazy spices like sister jinkies all we want to put cilantro and everything and then she comes to me saying Reverend why come my barbecue tastes like Mexican food the Lord is telling her to follow the recipe yeah follow the recipe rido when charcoal is hot place meat on grief when you place me gonna grieve with charcoal hey me minister godly cooking has emerged no and even idea that you can barbecue with less fat no oh yes a vile contraption that you can just set up on the countertop what am I talking about y'all George Foreman girl the George Foreman grill is nothing more than Lucifer's hot plate don't use this Greek yeah I don't think you heard me I said don't you real discreet Oh is there problem brother deacon chef Reverend my doctor says I don't need all that cholesterol in my diet and well I got one and I lost their vows do all of you have this devil contraction it cooks so lean Reverend I can't take all that grease grease grease is the Lord's meat nectar God made grease grease is good grease is the word what God giveth this grill taketh away gone gone now now now now tell me brother deacon cook the George Foreman grill make something as divinely tasting as this burger and now I know I gotta have that grease alright that's next week as we prepare our walk on water Chris site burning good cookie mr. Jackson Jackson witness arrest into your basketball career no comment mr. Jackson mr. Jackson why did you lock your naked wife in the shed did you see it happen did you see the lock and did you see him lock Rolando's in the same good to see you did you see it uh no okay well you just talked about to ask me Toby come on baby has this ever happened to you if you are the mother of a professional athlete there is always somebody have to get your baby mama now don't waste your money on these high-priced lawyers they don't know a lick about your boy watch me work Your Honor the prosecution will present 15 witnesses to say today wait a minute now Just Cause 15 guys told the same lie don't make it true if I suppose her gonna shoot you wouldn't call it a pancake which me Casey this mess come on baby ain't nobody gonna hurt you no more I don't care what go baby did i've defend him like he's my own because if it's my boy he didn't do it did you embezzle that man's three billion dollars you better tell me the truth I've stepped across I don't know I'm satisfied your ass down ha will whoop justice like a stove some the Law Offices of mama name accept payments and gold platinum diamonds or Bentley's don't even try to write no checks Randy Mouse call me the time has come for me go I've had so much fun entertaining yow till then it's time Livi the net show I'll see you when I see you from Hollywood California it's Cedric the Entertainer presents with Amy Merced Shaun Majumder JB Smoove Wendy Raquel Robinson has a beautiful sense gentlemen Cedric the Entertainer lucky ladies the said section job I'm sitting up here looking like Nate Dogg daddy on Easter actually leaves my church clothes and they look like now actually these might been out all night then just decide to go to church clothes you go to church see people you know they've been out so long they just been to the last little breakfast spot ending up at church smelling like Bacardi and syrup don't know how to act ain't been to church so long ain't being since Easter 78 goes up in Church in Rome talking all hip-hop language first of all I want to kill Big Ups to God Ram you bout it bout it uh Deacon y'all dropping bows on them you know the Jesus off the heezy fo sheezy mom into Christ Antipas we got a great show for y'all y'all come join me hi good morning tabby what are you doing here chairs Oh haven't you heard I'm teaching the 10 o'clock advanced class I'll be needing this room I don't think so Chaz I always teach the 10 o'clock oh really check the schedule I've been the master tap teacher here at the Cerritos YMCA for the past five years I think I know the chef you teach the intermediate I teach the advanced until now Tim's certified me so 8:00 a.m. this morning half of the advanced classes are mine is that so it is I don't think so oh really well what are you gonna do about it oh it is on challenge ouch

Channel: C2TIMES1104

Views: 1,666,502

Keywords: cedric, the, entertainer, presents

Id: rdlKbdjJMRc

Length: 90min 36sec (5436 seconds)

Published: Wed Dec 15 2010