Casino Royale Pitch Meeting: Introducing The Blonde Bond

so you have a James Bond movie for me yes sir I do and for this one I was thinking we could do kind of a gritty reboot of the character what do you mean well Christopher Nolan did that with Batman recently and people went nuts so I figure we should you know do that with everything for a decade well that does sound like a pretty good plan but I thought James Bond was already gritty well in the last movie we had him kitesurf on a tidal wave that sounds gritty to me it wasn't he could have died well I'm just saying it could be interesting to make this one in a way that's not like a wacky cartoon okay okay so what did you have in mind well first of all I think we need to recast the character you don't think Pierce Brosnan as gritty I think he looks like if a comfortable turtleneck came to life he does look like he gives good hugs right so I think we definitely need somebody a little more gritty did you have anyone in mind to be honest I'm not super familiar with British actors the only one that comes to mind is Daniel Radcliffe I'm pretty sure he's busy with the Harry Potter films and also he's a teenage boy right right of course what about Michael Gambon he's in his late 60s and also busy with Harry Potter films Maggie Smith old female busy with Harry Potter Oh how come I can only think of Harry Potter actors well those movies have snatched up most of the working British actors in the world oh dang it tell you what I'm gonna call our British division let them figure this one out for us we have a British division yeah it's where we steal all of our TV ideas from hey we need a new gritty James Bond can you guys get back to me with an idea ASAP thank you yeah no problem all right we'll come back to this the Americans want another actor for a new Bond film but I was just about to get to the part where all the characters are wearing period costume for no reason we'll all their dialogue be thickly laced with sarcasm no all of the characters are going to say directly what they mean very sophisticated I was also thinking we could shoehorn a load of catch phrases into entire sections of the script shoehorning catch phrases into scripts is tight but isn't it going to be difficult to force them into entire sections actually it'll be super easy barely an inconvenience oh really yeah yeah can you explain how um oh no I wasn't actually prepared to back that up with anything it's alright if we just kind of move on well whatever then Little Britain got away with it seriously though we need a new actor for font and the movies come out ever so slightly before the release date in America so we'll need to act fast all right well if we're short on time then I'm thinking maybe a Daniel Daniel Radcliffe no he's not very gritty and he'll be busy with the Harry Potter films Daniel day-lewis possibly too gritty about Daniel Craig to blond kind of a blonde bond it's weird rhymes and I'm pretty sure it was outlawed by the Queen in the 70s all right Liam Neeson far too blonde Idris Elba hoove lon I don't think you know who it just Alvar I said too blonde what if I were to suggest Daniel Craig for a second time a second time yeah what if I just literally suggested him again well that sounds great thank you very much so they're going with Daniel Craig well okay and I have to say it was pretty uncomfortable just now how Hugh and I were just standing here in complete silence waiting for him to call back it was a little weird wasn't it yeah so who's Daniel Craig exactly oh he's done a lot of stuff like Road to Perdition and layer cake what's up with him having two first names though I don't know about that that is pretty dang ridiculous pick a first name you weird out anyway so back to the movie oh yeah what's gonna happen in this thing the bond is gonna be on a mission where he has to capture a guy alive right right and so he's gonna chase him using parkour oh that's popular on the Internet yeah that's literally the only reason I wrote that in here very smart anyway so at the end of the chase bond is gonna shoot the guy in the chest and blow up an embassy oh my god what yeah big big boob what happened to capturing the guy alive oh yeah I guess I got so excited about the parkour I forgot about that part yeah that's understandable anyway so then bond is gonna track down a guy that sent a message to the guy he just killed okay yeah they're gonna have a little fight in public and bond is gonna stab him in the stomach with a little blade and so obviously he dies instantly of course a little knife to the stomach is instant death and all of that's gonna lead to bond going up against the big bad guy of this movie this guy Lucifer the Chiffre yeah it's French for the number cuz this guy is really good with numbers is he French no oh also he has this crazy thing were sometimes he cries blood does that gonna affect the plot in any way no oh eyeballs that bleed for no reason or tights have you encountered those before yes oh very mysterious so anyway let's shift uses a warlords money to buy some options on an airline company and he plans on blowing up their new plane that they're unveiling and making a bunch more money right but then bond stops that plane from exploding Sola Schiffer is in big trouble with that warlord right I imagine warlords don't like when you lose their money yeah so he sets up this high-stakes poker tournament in Montenegro to try to recoup some of that money and so bond an mi6 find out about that exactly so they arranged to have Bond play in the tournament - wait why do that so he can get close to the chef and bring him to justice why not just go capture him though well if the bad guy loses of the tournament then he's gonna be desperate for protection so the warlord and his people would come attack him if he loses but he already lost their money yeah yeah yeah I don't see why he doesn't already need protection so anyway during the tournament the warlord comes to attack us so he does need protection oh yeah I guess he does they should probably just bring this guy in right away yeah and also because bond is using government funds if he loses they'll have directly funded terrorism this is a terrible plan maybe but at least this way the fans get to watch James Bond play cards for an extended period of time and people will like that I don't know feels like we should spice that up a little bit oh well I do have a thing where Bond's gonna get poisoned during the game oh yeah see that's exciting yeah and he stumbles out to his car cuz he has a magical resuscitation machine in there Wow and then he can't get it to work in time so he dies what oh just for a minute then this woman Vesper that's with him comes to save him why didn't he go directly to see her when he knew he was poisoned unclear huh well it's gonna be tough for him to get back into the card game after that actually it's gonna be super easy barely an inconvenience oh really yeah he's just immediately fine and carries on but he died yeah a little no big deal it feels like a big deal well it's not so absolutely get off my back about it well okay then anyway so eventually Bond wins the tournament but then he gets captured oh yeah the shipper has this weight on a rope and he just swings it and hits bond in the balls over and over and over again oh my god yeah and then a dude comes in and shoot the bad guy in the face and bond wakes up in the hospital so he died and then recovered but then he got hit in the balls and that was too much that's right huh anyway so then he wakes up and he has a nice love scene with Vesper they're gonna have a love scene while he's in the hospital for having his balls crushed yeah super romantic stuff okay and then he's gonna tell her that he loves her cuz they spent like three days together oh that was quick yeah and then we're gonna spend about 30 minutes on them being in love and just having a great time oh that seems kind of excessive well we really want to sell the idea that maybe James Bond is gonna settle down with this woman you know quit being a spy forever even though nobody on earth is gonna buy that even though nobody on earth is gonna buy that well okay then but then it turns out that Vesper was gonna steal the poker money because her boyfriend was kidnapped Oh plot twist yeah so bond chases her down and kills a bunch of bad guys and then she drowns herself why does she do that because she can't be in the next movie this is James Bond we're talking about oh well that's very considerate of her to kill herself for the sake of the franchise it is and so yeah that's about it well it sounds like a fun new take on bond I'll get this Daniel Craig guy on the phone as soon as possible no how do you think Pierce Brosnan's gonna take it I'm sure he'll take it well hey guys it's Ryan here hope you enjoyed that pitch meeting big thanks to ollie fuel for helping out on that one you check out his stuff on YouTube at Victoria sponge we also have over a hundred pitch meetings on this channel if you want to check some of those out you can let me know in the comments section what other movies you'd like to see pitches for and don't forget to like subscribe tweet to share on Facebook tell your neighbor about the videos and as always check back soon for a new pitch bye bye

Channel: Screen Rant

Views: 2,336,909

Keywords: Casino royale, james bond, daniel craig, gritty reboot, pierce brosnan, 007, Le Chiffre, poker, poison, Vesper, british, Pitch meeting, plot holes, how it all started, honest, everything wrong, Funny, super easy barely an inconvenience, ryan george, screen rant, screenrant

Id: N939PW6H6IY

Length: 8min 16sec (496 seconds)

Published: Wed Feb 27 2019