Alan Alda - He EXUDES Goodness - 3/6 Visits In Chronological Order

[Music] please welcome out with all that [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Applause] we didn't know we didn't know whether to do the hog or not I know I know it's awfully moving we've met but it's not like we're that close yeah so there's no make sure to save the hug too laughter we've talked yeah well tell you what we talked for a bit and then we'll huh gasps you know what yeah just before you break for the next segment yeah we'll hug yeah all right but we'll have to do that thing when guys hug then do that three times in the back three three hard Pat's yeah then I think possible I'd okay but you got to say it out loud otherwise it looks like come over here congratulations on the Oscar nomination now you'll be nominated for Emmys a lot of times in you what Emmys a lot of times is there a difference yeah it's been nothing like this that's why I was so surprised at how excited I was you know I mean you know everybody here seems very happy for me and they are I well I you know I say seems because you never know sometimes people are just trying to get on your good side but but they people come up to me in the street and they they're really genuinely happy for me and I I'm very touched by that and I mean it's just it's different it's different it's like a it's like a national advantage I don't want it I don't want to surprise you but this Oscar thing it's a very big deal Ellen it's a very big deal well I don't know it's it's it's bigger than they're like the the Christmas parade down Hollywood yes it's big Wow well depends on who you are but you are you get nominated for being a senator yeah you play a senator bad guy and the skies are very sleazy yeah I think sometimes when I see the clip played I scare myself yeah he's a real guy it was a real guy and and he was a senator in the forties a very powerful guy yeah and I'd never heard of him I didn't you know he's a long time ago yeah so it's Scorsese asked me if like being this movie and I was so flattered you know this bond Scorsese Scorsese you know and Asthma place seems with Leo DiCaprio leave the Capri oh great actor yeah he is a very good doctor the underestimate he's one of these magnificent in this movie yeah I felt so flattered and then I I'm in the movie they send me research and I see a picture of the guy I'm gonna play yeah the ugliest man I ever said ugly as he was inside it was worse on the outside yeah so I thought well uh I don't know how flattered I am now yeah if there's a saint if there's a lot now you did a Santa throw in the West Wing it's right on the West but this is see this is wonderful they're both Republican senators right there but completely different people which I love I mean people just because it's the same job right that's right doesn't mean it's the same kind of person and the guy in the on the west wing is very principled guy far more principled so far than the Democrat you're the establishment now you're playing establishment figures now when I first became with you you were playing anti establish and mash very anti-establishment no one not show play that in Breton I got tired you're aware of this I'm sure but not where Britain yeah yeah well Britain it's an island near France they mentioned it in school right and in Britain when that she'll played there was no laugh track on this no they played it just like it was a little movie everyone I know and I don't somebody said if you look at the DVD you can turn the left track off I don't know if that's true and really I can't afford you it's funny because when I yeah I think after the Oscar you'll be okay but the thing was that when I came to America and I saw mash with a laugh track I'm wondering what the heck is going on here that was make sense you know it's funny about that there was a laugh track from the beginning because the networks all think that the audience at home won't know it's funny unless they hear people laughing right this is great respect for the America but we have real people well the funny thing was that the show apparently was funny enough that the people at home were laughing and they didn't hear the laugh track and after after about three years somebody came up to me in an airport said what is this he put a laugh track in really they finally got to a joke that the Machine thought was funnier than they did yeah that was that it's funny no I always thought with Hawkeye Pearson much I don't know why no one's ever backed me up on this I mentioned that today when I knew you were coming on people gonna I don't get that I always thought he was a little bit Groucho Marx in there somewhere oh my crazy thinking that no what's that and one episode I actually did an impersonation of Marx all the way through the show man well maybe that's where I got it then I don't know but I would do you think of that when you're when you're gonna in a role do you create do you do I take actors to copy necessarily mr. coffee but you know I mean like no I don't regard for so long it just didn't work no no no I I think sometimes the rhythm that it was written in something came out I have a voice that sometimes sounds like Groucho Marx yeah at one time I was in a restaurant in Hollywood and this guy I hear this voice call out behind me a mask I and I thought I'm not turning around for this guy a mesh guy this guy I'm if I turn around I'm gonna say something insulting this is not a nice thing to do arrested and turned around it was Groucho Marx did he say why are you doing me on on my shirt no he didn't know he probably didn't think I was doing so you're okay I'll never mention it again sure take a break welcome back I'm here with Alan Alda know Alan yes now Alan yes we talked about who this is if it's not rehearsed if you've been here rehearsal now what the hell of I mean I know you haven't shown up for rehearsals all week well is it I feel so bad you know I feel so bad I've let you down that's all right I can make the rehearsals I just can't make the performance you're talking about my entire career like you you play anti-establishment figure yes Hawkeye Pierce then you you had a bit of a career in between as well it's not like you just did that and then went straight to the Aviator right that's true you're playing the Senators do you think what do you prefer you it what can what do you feel suits you best anti-establishment or establishment what suits your personality what are you or my own personality I swing both ways hallo welcome to the UK that's a little work on Broadway I believe I have yeah no I what I mean is I on some tie sometimes I don't lie I don't get this red and blue thing no I agree with you I don't buy that either I I really do like I like Barack Obama's idea of being purple you know that this is do something good in in in both sides of the aisle as an argument to go yeah you want to hear what the arguments are right getting personal about it and rejecting people out of hand well that's why I always liked America for that because in Europe you know and it's particularly my part of it political differences people get hurt over them no Americans will shoot each other over cash or girlfriends yeah but they tend not to hurt each other for a long time over political differences and now it's getting worse no but they're they're very polite in in in England unless you're like at a soccer game job well that's a very there well that's something very important yeah you get caught up in that I kind of do I I know when I'm here I got Super Bowl fever just before you did yeah this is something you can take for that yeah yeah it's picking picking the Eagles this one I can take for it that then it goes away I wish for the Eagles even though I don't know anything about it because they were the underdog well that's I was for the Eagles cause they had the scariest looking logo oh they did didn't know that eagle is terrifying it is it's more it's more like a kind of vicious tyrunt it's like they pick a logo that will scare the other guy on the other side oh yeah I think so I think so all the Patriots have good that kind of Elvis thing yeah but see I I I was who the Eagles because I think patriotism is the last refuge of scoundrels aha that was dr. Samuel Johnson yes it was dr. Johnson dr. chauncey know what I did once I went to England and I took dr. Johnson and to Boswell and some stuff that Johnson wrote and we went in Scotland and in England all only to the places where they had lunch well I got to tell the some of the a some of the goods here may not know who Johnson and Boswell Oh Johnson and Boswell had an act in vaudeville go to joy dr. Johnson wrote the first English dictionary yeah and he was a very well-respected writer in the UK in Britain in the 17th through 17th century I think I think was even 17th or 18th I can't remember right and he had a friend called Boswell James Boswell cottage biographical and they used to go in little travels together yeah aren't you glad you're tuned into this guy you know I know when they phones if you can't be funny be interested or just frighten them the hell are they talking about I think Johnson and Boswell used to hug and give three like they did they were the ones who began the three paths yeah yeah so what do you do it what do you do now you're going back to your as soon as they finish this next couple of shows on West Wing I'm going back to New York to do Glengarry Glen Ross oh great Mamet play yeah on Broadway with Liev Schreiber alongside of Liev Schreiber and and Jeffrey Tambor it's gonna be Wow yes just wonderful back on Broadway yeah yeah I love you you act on the stage too right yeah not anymore I'm just this you know I'm I'm this now whatever that is this is it this is like being on the stage I mean you have to relate to the audience a little no no listen good luck with the pie Thank You Oscar nomination although everybody [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Applause] enough they seem very nice yeah yeah you even haven't hugged him yeah well they seem they seem clean you know did you pick that up when you were out discovering about chimps they're going to hug people hugs don't they do they ever I had one punch me in the face once were you in a bar drinking with it and then after he hit me knocked me over and he was just a little kid you know and then in any and then they he made some gesture and they said it was it like this he went like this and they said oh he's apologizing it looks a lot like the punch yeah yeah that's a black job I'm sorry I was apologizing friendly I don't know you were into monkeys not only are they not monkeys I'm not into them are you a big animal lover I will learn like animals yeah but I I mean I'm you know I have to meet a lot of as I've interviewed many animals on the same show oh yeah well you're very song like this one that you showed that clip room that's on tomorrow night yeah and and that's that's the that's the third of a three-part series and then this part it's all about how what makes us human yeah they look in my brain in MRI machines to find out what makes us human do we think about poop as much as chimpanzees how much time you devote to that poop no thinking about thinking about poop I know much if I'm honest yeah you know I I went to a Catholic High School and there was a priest who taught us who to just every few weeks would say you know the average adult only thinks about sex about ten minutes a day so you kids you shouldn't be obsessed with so I would think to myself well I'll get my ten minutes in now the average adult only thinks about sex ten minutes a day that's what he told I mean there's about 10 minutes a day I don't think about sex and that's only because I'm thinking oh I'm thinking too much about sex that's the 10 minutes man I'm trying to cut back yeah you got to yeah yeah Jay can give it up any time I want you know what sex no what did I what are we talking about did that jump through its poop on you at any point I did actually he was heaving rocks at us well that's no friendly no no not as friendly as poop would be around that's not even friendly unless in German you know you know I just realized you wrote a book it's wonderful yes somebody left it in my dressing room yeah that's how we get rid of all yeah alright you know I picked it up I was so glad to see it written look aside you're just such such a wonderful writer and I and I did what you know every thoughtful person would I flip to the back to see if I was in the index there's no damn index in the book how do you expect the big famous important person like me to read a book without if you two looked at the chapter listing chapter 14 Alan and the monkeys okay over then I'll take a bell you know I'll I read the first two chapters it was just great I just yeah it sends a pocketwatch left out loud what to pack allies I'd only yeah it's an autobiography exactly so yeah I read you but they never have your dog stuffed book thank you yeah what is it with the poop thing what is that never have your dog stuffed but then you said poop you said you said Buch [Applause] you it's a good thing sometimes like you you go back over and you call back on the joke because that's called recycling I'm very million because for about the first five minutes I didn't know what perky was Oh porky oh you know what perky is chimpanzees they're perky yeah you know listen you're not putting forward this ludicrous notion of evolution in your science no no no everything just was there you know right fossils are there for God to test our faith sailing in about trouble here have you got a science program about space no you want to do one about space you want to get your monkey said them into space didn't they do that already daddy dad yeah they did what he'll do it again what that would be like a rerun what what didn't they what happened to that monkey went in space what does a chimp or a monkey it was I think there's a chimp his name was that Stan I think and they they sent him in his base and he came back he was great you know he actually I think he lives in Marina del Rey you do sometimes know what you're gonna say never I figured if I keep talking something's gonna get me thirty million dollars you know what what's what's great I was thinking that we one of the things that's supposed to make us humans that you that the scientists told me but one of the essential things is that we read one another's minds that we're always watching to see how we're doing with the other person I can't have thought you were gonna say that yeah like like for instance thank thank God I'm not on NBC eh yeah [Applause] yeah boy that's that's something all of that and do you follow the follow that kind of thing well I it's it seems it's funny to me that it gets so much attention and I wonder how it I mean as someone who does it professionally or nearly so nearly I would I wonder sometimes how it must affect them you know before they go on first of all are people gonna laugh at somebody who makes 30 million a night you know II hope one day to find out that was a good joke about take the 300 million in by I Alex I like that hey hey you know what we're out of time all right no kidding yeah yeah it goes like that is there anything you'd like to plug [Applause] [Music] no well your darn book is real good I don't want to plug it that's unseemly huh no it is go the publishers get mad they say plug on your show I'm like come on that would be I was doing yeah so you should go on Jay Leno and plug it there wouldn't be a good idea I don't know I'm yeah yeah no maybe no the views expressed by Alan old are not those expressed by the somebody [Applause] [Music] my my first guest tonight is an awesome actor in a new movie called Tower Heist which is in theaters now take a look at this please welcome Alan Alda everybody [Music] yeah yeah yeah go [Applause] how are you pal fine do you look ya'll look sensational you look like you just had a vacation or something you know when I really did look good nobody said you look great wait I did I said it to my TV screen B she couldn't hear me no no you do agree you look like rested and slightly tan no it's makeup really where'd I get me some of that action I'm alright yeah I can't get mine undone that's and that's why America loves you that's yeah because you know how to wink in the right place never gets himself undone this movie looks good is it any good it is good it makes me laugh it's a funny movie that's what you want from a comedy yeah it is a comedy that's it is goodness for that part yeah because if you go see a movie and it's meant to be a powerful drama and you're laughing your ass off oh you thought I was winking I wasn't winking I said no they started putting some guy with a hit in a glass with a spoon and every time I wink apparently right now they've just started at watch see they dish came up with that tonight they just came up with that right now this is a historic moment I'm so glad to be on the show this historic you know now we know what Victoria's Secret is [Music] that's exciting have you ever seen any anyone Royal in their underwear I mean you've been in England you've been to France you must have seen somebody the Queen Mother once but she was lovely I liked her yeah Elizabeth yeah you didn't show up in her underwear anything she was probably wearing underneath that's what makes them royal because if you wear your underwear over your clothes you're a superhero yeah clearly different tight I know I know now listen I I don't think of you just as an actor not that there's anything wrong with that but I I think he was a writer too didn't you just lay yes I just wrote a play I didn't just drive it been writing it for over four years did you just finish it rained every comments on that yes I'm actually writing it now it's it's now playing at in Los Angeles at the Geffen Playhouse and I'm so excited about that it's very good it's about Marie Curie you know they're ready to invented the x-rays No well she was one of the world's greatest scientists that's what I meant yeah yeah it was she French well actually she was considered a French scientist but she was born in Poland she had a lot of trouble from that they didn't think got mad at her at one point and then called her a foreigner and they're gentle to a lot of trouble well it plays for just in Polish yeah Bradley partly yeah what do you know partly what it was he she loved her husband very much unfortunately he died she got very depressed right and she fell in love with one of his former students and it would and it brought her out of her depression and she could go on with a working one the second Nobel Prize the only thing is he was married ah and his way I want to hear from that person who went ooh because I don't see what you think about this and in those days it was considered commonplace for a married man to have a mistress however she wasn't supposed to be of the same social class as the wife so it was this when they separated yeah the guy fell in love with a secretary right and my wife knew about and didn't say anything oh because he was a different class different class now how do you feel about that who said that raise your hands lingonberry p10 if you argue I can about you feel so listen tell me what station is this on I can't remember this is one of those one of those really local access yes No why did you become obsessed with Mary kind of assess whether I'm in love with her she's my hero is my you a big science bullfights well I am a science buff and I was gonna write up an evening of letters without actors would read about Marie Curie and let her letters write because they were probably very interesting I thought and then I find out that the letters are in the parish library right and there's still radioactive oh well you probably want to leave them for a bit well I said I I switched to Einstein after nice good idea yeah but but I get so I was so taken with her life that I decided I wanted to write a whole play about her you know and and hardly anything in the play is radioactive but you know I sorry I didn't mean the time no no no you went right ahead you just went but you know and then you went straight from a joke what's going on what's your secret so I what were we talking about something yeah probably we were talking about one of the great scientists who ever lived I asked you if you were science buff you said and then you started playing with my shirt and then do you watch do you watching this the Mythbusters are on TV that's my big sign you like the yes I do see the McKay I know I like Amanda there are smart guys they're scientists you know yeah yeah yeah ever think about doing that instead of acting like like when you were a kid you know not not long ago I did a science I did a science program for eleven years of PBS where I acted smart oh yeah yeah of course you did yeah yeah yeah and I love everyone in PBS that people assume you're smart because you're on PBS that's right what they don't know is you're broke because you're not thinking I listen I'm now that I'm a playwright I need the cash I'm looking forward to the $50 prizes oh yeah [Applause] real hand real cash single single dollar bills that I need singles cuz i buy very few things yeah but now what is that no you don't just get I don't just get it for being adorable what do I have to do you have to answer one question one question hand you can win the big cash prize like $50 only just holding probably no let's just say it might not be a Marie Curie related question so that's that I hope it is gonna it's the only thing I can remember don't touch it don't touch it all right all right all right so okay all right let's see Iceland is in the North Atlantic yes that's the end that's the thing that gets you ready for the quiz like that was the question really sighs I was like multiple choice no no it's like this is the instead of everything go dude oh yeah that it's like I start with I start off you know sentencing okay okay Iceland is in the North Atlantic its capital city is reka Vick right you just said the two things like no right true or false butterflies actually taste with their feet can I just ask you one just little question out of curiosity huh what the hell does that have to do with Iceland anyway everybody chop especially you it doesn't it does imagine in Iceland it's the quest the actual question that the power of Iceland was setting the scene but the scene is somewhere else I don't even think they have a butterfly in Iceland it's to that that's just where you're wrong they're famous for the Bjork but fly okay now all right you I mean you want to true or false the answer on that that weird with I'm gonna cover up the answer but it says it tastes they taste with the feet no with their mouths not with their mother now the problem is not with them now so like you know this is not working okay no not with their mouth so because you asked me a crappy question I get 250 right now no but you go for you got to the one chance I mean it's a true or false they taste with their feet or they don't but wait a minute you just gave me the answer no I gave you the spelling mistake they taste with their feet and not with their mouths you're right [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music]

Channel: The Jayleno Fly

Views: 41,080

Keywords: クレイグと女の子の女性, クレイグ・ファーガソン, ロボットをゲオフ, craig ferguson, craig ferguson and the ladies, flirting masterclass, funny late night, best talkshow, funny talkshow, talkshow compilation, talkshow moments, flirt talkshow, geoff the robot, the jayleno fly, funny moments, super happy fun time hour with robot and old man, alan alda, alan alda craig ferguson, alan alda interview, alan alda horace & pete, alan alda funny, best of alan alda, alan alda compilation, alan alda louis ck

Id: rXm7C8zbYSE

Length: 30min 9sec (1809 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 06 2017