♪ (upbeat techno intro) ♪ - (React) So, I have a riddle for you.
- Oh, okay. Oh, no. Okay. - Ooh. Okay, Gollum,
give it to me. - (React) So, today,
I'm gonna show you something happy, but it might make you cry.
- Oh, goddammit! - (React) It's scary,
but it's also a cause for celebration.
And it's something that all of us in the LGBT+ community
do at one point in our lives. Do you know what it is?
- Uh... is it coming out?
- If it's all of us, it's going to be coming out.
- Is this a coming out video? - (React) Yes.
- Awesome. - (React) So, have you ever
seen anyone come out on TikTok? - Yes! I've seen a few.
- And I look at it as a parent now watching it,
and so I just see how scared they are, and that makes me sad.
But they're incredibly moving and incredibly touching.
And I just wanna hug them. - (React) Did it inspire you
to wanna come out when you're watching
these types of videos? - Yeah, definitely,
'cause I actually came out twice, being like, "How do I
tell my parents?" Not that I thought my parents
were gonna disown me or anything, but, you know, it's scary.
So, I came out to them the first time,
and they were like, "Cool." And then, I came out
a second time. They were like,
"Yeah, duh. We knew." (laughs) - (React) Anyway, so there
are tons and tons and tons of people coming out on TikTok.
- I'm interested to see the ones on TikTok.
I feel like they're gonna be a little more creative perhaps.
And I think you're right. I think I will cry,
so let's see. - (React) Let's watch
kinda the first one that kinda started
the whole trend. - Okay!
- (React) And I know this is really hard to see,
but it says, "Surprise, I'm bi." - I thought so.
I thought-- I was kinda reading that a little.
- (brother) Want me to come? - Stop.
- (Tatiana) Sure. Well... - (mom) "Surprise, I'm..."
- (dad) Bi. - (laughs)
- (mom) You are? - (dad) Racial? - (mom) You are?
- (dad) Racial? - Biracial! (laughs)
- (Tatiana) No, bisexual. - (mom) Awww!
- (dad) Is this a joke? - (Tatiana) No.
- (brother) Does it look like she's joking?
- (mom) Well, good for you! - (Tatiana laughs)
- Ahhh, yeah! - (mom speaks foreign language)
This is good news. - (dad) Awww.
We love you no matter what. - Dad was a little slow
to catch up, but he got there. He got there.
- (mom) Aww. - (laughs) That's really sweet.
The mom is super sweet. - They're so supportive!
- (React) And that's her brother. - I was gonna say,
that's her brother filming! - (React) So, that was Tatiana's
coming out. What are your thoughts? - Oh, it seemed like
it went really well. - (React) How do you feel
about her using a cake to come out? - I think that's really cute,
especially if you're nervous. - If you put it externally
on a cake, then they could regard the cake,
and it takes the pressure off of you a little bit,
and they just look at the message. And the worst case scenario
is that they get cake. - I was already living
with my wife at the time, and I had gone shopping
with my mom, and went to lunch at Taco Bell.
They thought we were roommates, right? And "What are you gonna do
if Laura meets someone and you have to move out?"
I'm like, "Oh, it'll be fine. I'll figure it out,"
blah, blah, blah. And she kept going
and going and going. I said, "Mom,
we're together. I'm gay." - (React) So, Tatiana's video
and videos like Tatiana's inspired a lot of other LGBT+ people
on TikTok to come out. Let's take a look at another one.
- Yay! - (React) I'm just gonna explain
kind of what you're seeing when you first see it.
- Okay. - (React) On the right,
that is Jamie. Jamie is non-binary.
That's Jamie. And Jamie's pronouns
are he/they. - Okay.
- (React) But it's a duet. So, on the left side
of the video is Jamie on right with Jamie's sister
on the left reacting to the video. - Okay.
- (Jamie) I wish I were a boy. ♪ (soft ukulele music) ♪ Not all the time, just sometimes.
I wish I could put on eyeliner and glitter and actually look good
and have girls whisper about my bookshelves,
'cause I look like a character from their favorite book.
And I wish I were a boy with dark, fluffy hair
that I love to mess up and shake and makes everyone
stop and stare. And I wish I were a boy,
so I'd finally look cute in dresses and skirts
and pants and suits. And I wish I were a boy
with a deep rock and roll voice that makes people stop
in their tracks, but I don't have that choice.
And I wish that I did, 'cause every song I write
for myself never sounds right, because it was meant
to be sung by somebody else. I'm happy being me,
but sometimes I wonder what I would be like
as the opposite gender. Would I finally be happy being me,
because I like being a girl? But... - That was the most perfect, accurate, descriptive,
educational song about a non-binary person
I think I have ever seen. I am shooketh.
I feel like I am seen. - There was production value in that!
- You can tell that they're definitely an artist, and he put
so much thought into it. And it was very much
their emotion as well. - Ukulele in the background
and kind of vocalizing all these things
that you've been thinking. That's a super creative way
of coming out. - Although I am out and proud
and everything and I am, you know, not afraid
to show who I am, sometimes it's nice
to see other people like me and the trickle down effect
of all the categories under the rainbow.
And I love that. That's exactly how I feel, you know?
Some days, I do want to be quote, unquote, "girl,"
more so aesthetically and mentally than anything else.
But also, there's days where I'm completely fine
with being a guy. I feel like if somebody
ever came up to me and asked me "What is non-binary?"
or "What do you mean?" I'd show them that video.
- (React) So, not every coming out is planned in advance, though.
- Yeah. (chuckles) - (React) Sometimes
it happens by accident. Let's take a look at Sir Carter's
coming out story. - Okay.
- (Sir Carter) My coming out story was not as cute as some of y'all's,
let me tell you. I see y'all making
little rainbow cakes with "I'm gay" on it,
little five-paragraph poems just explaining--
that shit's cute! But you wanna know how I came out?
You wanna know? I was at a restaurant with my parents,
and there was this FINE-- when I tell you this,
FIIIINE-ass boy at the table across. And I was just eating my food, like,
looking back... - Like, just stare. The...
- (Sir Carter) ...flirting with the eyes a little bit,
giving the little Debby Ryan look! And I was just looking--
and the last time, I just...
Just a little glance. He got his ass up,
walked over to the table. I was like, "Oh, [censored].
What the [censored]. What is he doing, bitch?"
And he comes over. He's like, "Hey, I thought
you were cute, and I just kinda wanted to get--
I wanted to get your Snap!" And I was like, "Ooh."
And I looked at my parents. I was like, I have a decision.
I can either risk it all for the [censored] and come out
or have to turn this fine-ass man away.
Guess what I did? I got the Snap
and I came out, period! - Good.
- (Sir Carter) And do you wanna know what my parents said?
They said, "Good for you. He was cute."
- Awww. - (Sir Carter) [Censored] king
and queen right there, [censored]! - Nice. Nice.
That's my coming out kind of story. I like that story!
- Yeah, that's a-- (smooches)
It's mwah. Chef's kiss. Chef's kiss reaction
of like, "He was cute. Good for you."
- (React) What would you have done if you were in his shoes?
- I'd give him the Snap. (laughs) What it boils down,
my parents love their kids. I'll take a couple months
of them being pissed and da, da, da,
for that, you know what I mean? - Yeah, sometimes it takes
a little time, I think, sometimes for parents
to wrap their heads around it. - My relatives, again,
very Catholic, very conservative. You know, those things
are not really disgust. But we have figured out a way
to come out elegantly, where it's not an issue.
And that is, if you talk about your partner,
you just mention their pronouns. And that is usually enough
for people to go, "OH!" And then, if they're ready
to discuss, then they'll say, "So, how long did you know?"
And then, that's when you know you can talk to them about it.
- I remember when I first came out to one of my girlfriends.
I was working this job at a fashion show,
and one of the male models, this really tall,
super hot Brazilian guy, kept staring at me.
I was like, "There's no way he's looking at me.
Whatever. In my dreams." Plot [censored] twist:
Within the next hour, he's following me around
like a puppy dog. Next thing you know,
I have his number. It was because of that sort of spark
and just natural desire that I had to tell my girlie about it.
I went over to her house, and I was like,
"I am so into this guy." And she was like, "Okay,
so you're into him." And it was never like,
"So, are you gay? You're gay?" It was just, "All right." - (React) Coming out doesn't
always need to be a big production or an accident.
- Yes. - (React) It can also just be
super, super simple like the video I'm about to show you.
- Oh, I'm gonna cry. I'm already choked!
- (teen) Hey, Mom, there's something I wanna tell you.
- (mom) Yeah? - (teen) Mom.
- (mom) What? - (teen) I'm trans.
- (mom) Okay. Are you? - (teen) Yeah.
- (mom) Okay. So, what does that mean for us?
- That was a great question. "Okay, what does that mean for us?"
- (teen) I'm a boy. - (mom) Okay.
All right. So, new name?
- (teen) Oliver. - (mom) Oliver. Okay.
- That's awesome. - (mom) ...with Dad
when we get home and... and figure out how to make
that happen for you. - (Oliver) Thank you. (laughs)
- (mom) You're welcome. - (Oliver) Oh my god!
(laughs) I was so nervous this entire car ride.
- Aww, don't be nervous. Honestly, I always wonder
what the parents think watching their kid cry
or afraid to tell them. - That was like
[censored] textbook. - I love that.
I love how casual that was, the mom just being like,
"Okay, cool. What's your name? Okay, we'll get the process going."
- She asked for the name, which was amazing.
- And also, the music behind the video was perfect. I felt like
it was a gospel, like, ♪ Hallelujah ♪
- But I'll tell you what, man, that woman NAILED that reaction!
Nailed it! Mad props. - (React) There's probably,
you know, a lot of people who are contemplating coming out.
Maybe they're not quite ready to come out,
and that's okay too. - Yeah.
- (React) And I wanted your reaction to this video.
- Okay. (knocking)
- Hello? - Oh, hey, hey, hey.
I brought you some snacks. You got a hanger on your head.
Here, I brought you some snacks, though.
Here you go. Just wanted you to know
that take your time. And when you're ready,
you got a whole group of people that support you.
All right. See you later. - Oh, that's so great!
- That's really sweet. I love that. - Yes! That's so good!
Why did that one make me cry? Although, it was kinda funny too.
- I might copy that. I'm gonna copy that sage.
- (React) So, what advice would you have for someone
watching this, young or old, who's maybe considering coming out?
- As much as you wanna come out, it's gonna depend
on your circumstance, who you're coming out to.
You can sort of gauge based off of previous discussions
who might be a good ally. - For anybody who's just confused
in their self and their identity, that's okay.
You don't have to know. If none of the labels feel right,
that's okay. You don't have to pick one of them.
- Even before I came out as trans, like, "I'm too old.
I can't do this," 'cause, you know,
you look on YouTube and all these trans YouTubers are like,
"Oh, I started transitioning when I was in high school."
And I was like, "I would've loved that!"
But I've heard stories of people in their 70s
and 80s finally being like, "Hey, I'm trans,
and I'm transitioning." And I'm like,
(claps) "Yes!" It's never too late
to be authentic and live your truth. - Whether you find love or not
is always going to be up in the stars, right?
But ultimately, you look for who respects you.
And that is who your community and family is.
- Sometimes, your family, as a queer person,
isn't your immediate family. It is your closest friend.
It is the queer person who works at the 7-Eleven
that you frequent often who has amazing nails
and the coolest eyeliner you've ever seen.
And before you know it, this video will be old,
I will be ancient, and you'll be like, "LOL
remember when George was trying to convince me to come out
and now Kiking together at all the gay clubs?"
- But if there are people in your life that you know
you'd be unsafe, that you know would cause you harm
emotionally or physically or be that, you don't owe them the explanation
of coming out to them. - Come out to yourself.
Learn to appreciate you, who YOU are.
And once you can build that up, then maybe you'll be able to get
to the point where you feel so good about who you are as a person
that the other noise doesn't matter. - I thought, "Oh, I'm bi.
You know, that's a good label for me." And then, I went to my first Pride,
and one of the most fiercest women I have ever met in my life,
she explained to me what queer was. It's an umbrella term
that encapsulates the fluidity of gender and sexuality.
So, when she explained what that was, I was like, "Oh my god. That's me."
And that Pride weekend, I came out to my close group
of friends. - Don't feel pressure
if you're not ready. And if you are ready, then know that
there's a huge community here that will love you endlessly.
- Don't let any person on this planet try to dim your shine
or tell you that you aren't valid or you don't get to exist,
because, baby, you are here and you are [censored] queer! - (React) And on that note,
I have kind of a scripted little moment, where we can
tell our viewers about the Trevor Project.
- Great. If you're feeling sad or alone--
I'm gonna cry! Wait. I'll do it. I'll do it.
(clears throat) If you're feeling sad or alone,
there are people who would love to talk to you.
- Give someone at the Trevor Project a call.
- Or if you have a little bit of anxiety with phone calls,
visit their website. - Or you can even text them.
- They're available 24/7. - The Trevor Project has some
awesome coming out resources online. I encourage you to check them out.
- Remember, you are loved. And coming out or not,
you do you.
