Last week on Leo’s youtube channel: *insert
clips* Ah, I can already smell victory in this pleasant
sea breeze today. *starts humming the Marseillaise, cuts off*
What the … ? What is the french navy doing here? Did they think that I was going to take over
Bordeaux, this puny town? They aren’t firing, though. Napoleon: Who are you? Louis: I am Louis, the eighteenth. Brother of Louis, the sixteenth. And I hereby order you to stop your attempt
to overtake this land right now. The people may like you, but I do not. If you don’t agree, I am first going to
destroy your fleet, then burn down your pathetic village. Napoleon (to himself): That hasty-witted measle
knows exactly that I have no choice, but to comply. (out loud) If you ask so nicely, I can’t
refuse. Enraged, I went back to my base, only to discover
that Louis had put up a watch station. Yeah, that would go against all my plans and
it went without saying that I started an attack on the watch station the next day. It seemed that Louis had known that as well
and he decided to face me head-on. I had to admit that I admired the gesture
somewhat. Despite the unfavorable weather, my men effortlessly
stormed the station. Only Louis could escape , adided by the chaos
of the battlefield. The next day, I let out my inner pyromaniac
and set the watch station aflame. I also left Louis a little message in case
he would come back. I have to admit that I felt really content
with myself when I went to bed. That changed when I woke up, only to see Louis,
rush towards my town with his sword drawn. At first, I thought he had come to duel me
and I welcomed the challenge. Only when he deployed his army did I realize
that the threat back then hadn’t been an empty one. Desperate, I tried fighting off all his men,
but I was drowned in their numbers. Louis burned down my fields, blew up my houses,
and killed most of my citizens. No matter how many times, I threw myself at
the enemy, it didn’t make a difference. In the end, I could only watch in horror as
even my bed was blown up and I found myself back in the accursed jungle. After an arduous journey, I came back only
to find my army camp in complete ruins. The heart-wrenching sensation I felt at that
moment surprisingly came from having lost Ekil and Leche-potte, not the countless human
lives. After tending to the most urgent problems,
I finally noticed the enormous message floating in the air: I have Kil. I have Ekil? My sorrow immediately turned to anger. Dying in battle was honorable and the flow
of life, but dying in captivity was worse than dying by choking on a banana. On day 105, I fixed most of the damage the
attack had caused. To my absolute surprise, I found that one
of my four hunting dogs had survived. I named him vengeance to help me keep focused
on my newfound goal. The next day, I built a wall around the army
encampment. I also put down four of those sturdy gates
in each cardinal direction and built this enormous lookout tower. I followed the wise words of Nim Chimpsky:
“Give orange me give eat orange me eat orange give me eat orange give me you” and prepared
to steal resources to grow my army. I couldn’t yet afford to anger the western
countries, so I went to fight the jungle natives. On my way there, the last survivor of this
Italian ruin attacked me. When he realized his ambush had failed, he
pulled vengeance with him to his grave. If vengeance was in my shoes, he would have
wished for me to just carry on and so I did. Luckily I found out that there was an entire
village of natives in that jungle before I committed to the attack. With my troops, we wiped out their leader’s
hut pretty quickly, but as I had feared, they didn’t have any valuables. I was about to retreat and call this a failure,
but I accidentally fell in this sea of native warriors. After several attempts, I got only half of
my stuff and all of my men back. I then raided this nearby temple which actually
contained some noice loot. I had an awkward moment with one of my miners
when he tried to sleep with me. I couldn’t fault him for that, I had started
the “sleeping together trend” to increase bebe production after all. But, you know, I wasn’t into that kind of
thing. So, I built myself this house. You may now be asking yourself. Leo, where is the door? Let me tell you something: I don’t need
doors, because my citizens are way too stupid to get out of this hole. They will be like: Oh, I want to sleep. Maybe I sleep in Commander’s bed? Oh, no I am trapped in a hole and can’t
get out! And if I eventually arrive, I am going to
tell them that I would love to give them a bed *halt* covered in dung and Plutonium. On day 113, I hired a lot of miners and built
an improved mating hall. I kid you not. When I woke up the next day I found myself
staring into the eyes of the town healer. After some failed attempts, I figured out
how redstone works and I now have an unbreakable design. In theory. I also made two of my fishers into miners
which pushed the already ridiculous mining speed even further. On day 115, I cleared up some problems with
the courier and gave the love corner a roof. I made this chunk loader which meant my people
wouldn’t even get to stop working while I was away. The majority of the camp was now made up of
miners, which meant that I would never have to worry about getting more precious metals. Still, my warehouse was now also overflowing
with cobblestone. This is why I decided to build a trashcan
that would automatically dispose of cobblestone and quickly got a prototype working. When I scouted out the surrounding area, I
found that the watch station was remanned once again and this enormous castle had seemingly
sprung up from the ground. During my scouting, I got attacked by a group
of Kermit-like frogs, and let me tell you I am booking sessions with my therapist right
now. Luckily, they got entangled with a french
knight and I escaped. In the meantime, the prototype of the cobblestone
destroyer had done great work and I expanded its capabilities the next day. The constant clicking of the Redstone clock
paired with the flashing of items being burned would provide a great place to sleep. On day 120, I destroyed the watch station
once and for all with only three lava buckets. I also found out that you could actually steal
the enemy’s siege equipment and I went to the pirate island I had already beaten in
part 1 and got their cannons. The next day, I found the old man responsible
for the warehouse in the trap I had set, but I couldn’t bring myself to make due on my
threats. Although this cannon doesn’t have any ammo,
it would act as a detergent. I tried to dabble in using waterwheels to
power a mine, but all my attempts failed. The only thing I could do was open up a new
mine and get even more miners. The recipe for a lot of ammo types needs wool
for some reason, so I captured some sheep. The next day, I set out once again to find
more siege equipment. I started a naval fight with the pirate ship
ankered nearby, only to find out that a ballista kills you instantly. Like, why the frick do you die to an oversized
toothpick, but not a solid ball of metal smashing into you at 500 kilometers per hour. For some reason, I thought that it would be
a good idea to light the boat on fire with the ballistae still on it. I baited the crew around for the next days
but was never able to get to the captain’s chest as new pirates continued to spawn in. The time wasn’t all wasted, as I found out
that the nearby town, Bordeaux, was quite unprotected now that Louis fleet was gone. When I dreamed of a titan Kermit frog that
night, I decided that I had to eradicate them. To my surprise, they were gone and I instead
had to settle on beating up everyone in a nearby supply camp. I also had to once again kill the new garrison
of the watch station. That guy never learns a lesson. During the expedition to kill all the Kermit
frogs, I had discovered a mine. The next day, I set out to loot it and killed
a Teletubby chilling in a pond. Our numbers simply overwhelmed the garrison
stationed at the mine. Bolstered by the easy capture I descended
down into the mine alone and fell into the enemies trap. But honestly, I didn’t mind. This mine had been a gold mine … Like a
literal gold mine. The one stack of gold I found would be enough
to build a second army division. Archers simply would cut it when attacking
an enormous castle. One needs cannons, catapults, trebuchets and
a battering ram to get into a castle or a walled town. So, I hired all the siege engineers willing
to join. Basically all siege vehicles, apart from cannons,
were torsion-based, so I went back down to my trusty spider spawner to get string. I then got some thick ballistae *insert plural*
After fully equipping all my new soldiers, I was ready to conquer my first city. The soldiers guarding the coat were kinda
stupid and I drowned the first and trapped the second in a boat. I knew that I couldn’t conquer the city
with my men in one fell swoop like I had usually done. This needed strategic planning. I first built this platform off the coast
of the city. This would be the initial base. My men could revive as long as the healer
stayed alive. And I would like to see someone try to attack
five ballistae, two cannons, and a trebuchet head-on. When all the troops were deployed, I would
then run towards the city, lure out the soldiers and my men would mow them down like wheat. Luckily, the army food rations only ran out
when we had just secured the landing, else the army might have been wiped out by the
time I came back. I tried to lure out the garrison in the walled-off
part of town, but they didn’t bite. During the entire attack, this anti-naval
tower had been constantly killing my men using powerful ballistae, so I decided to pay them
back in kind and I redeployed my siege engineers not far away from the tower. I breached their gate, disabled the ballistae. *insert music* and stormed their tower with
a few of my trusted men. I killed off the rest of the enemies not in
the walled part of town and had to stop for a moment. Man, the founder of this town truly has a
magnificent dong. Now that the first part of the plan was complete,
I got more food and ammo. On day 143, we started our attack on the heart
of the town. Under the cover of my archers, I was eventually
able to find my way to the bank. A major point keeping my army camp from growing
was the fact that we couldn’t trade with any city. Now that I had access to a bank, I could finally
use all the gold coins I had amassed. As soon as I opened the way for my soldiers
to advance directly into the guards towers, the battle was as good as won. We cleaned out the last pockets of resistance
and I actually found a secret myth buster lab, where Jamie would first look me deeply
in the eyes, then offered to sell me this extremely strong diamond gear. I sailed home so fast that I could have competed
in the world championship, dropped off all my soldiers and got all my gold. And it was well worth it: sharpness five,
baby. I spent the days getting the army back in
fighting order, further improving my gear and killing spiders. With some new ballistae and mending enchants,
we were ready to take on the gigantic castle standing in our way. I set the forest surrounding the castle aflame
in advance, to produce a CO2 influx to weaken their minds. I also prepared a battering ram to break open
the gate, some cannons and a trebuchet. Finally, the day of battle arrived, no one
would stand between me and Ekil. While my archers and the ballistae men kept
the enemies near the battlements suppressed, I started destroying the gate. For some reason, there was a button at the
bottom of the gate which automatically opened it. Yeah, I have no idea, who thought that that
was a good idea. My soldiers were getting shredded by the archers
hiding within the castle, so I destroyed the second main gate and broke into their treasury. That would make them focus a majority of their
defense on guarding the corridors leading towards the lord’s chambers. Under the cover of my archers, I then simply
built my way up to the top. I gathered a few men the next day and let
the slaughter start. When we had gotten a firm hold on the top
of the castle and, hehem, I died once, I gathered all my men to storm the castle. Under the well-trained slashes of my men,
the enemies perished left and right and we advanced into the heart of the castle. A desperate counterattack by the last guards
pushed us back quite a bit, but their death was inevitable. We broke through the castle roof, into the
common room and finally into the chamber of the lord of this castle. I don’t know why the lord fought back even
though he was outnumbered 30:1, it might have something to do with the fact that we disturbed
him in his intimate affairs. I obviously said sorry to his wife, for killing
her husband and you know interrupting them and all that. Now that the castle’s lord was dead, they
wouldn’t pose a threat to my army. So, I left and decided to focus on increasing
the defenses of my base in case Louis decided to retaliate. I basically increased the height of my wall,
placed down several ballistae guarding each cardinal direction and built some windows
using iron bars. Through all my battles, I hadn’t forgotten
Ekil and my ultimate goal - To conquer Paris. I had already formed a solid plan and for
that, I needed to go into the nether. *small montage* I got some carrots from the
city I had conquered, I am sure they won’t mind. Now we have everything to initiate Mission:
Platypus. Do you see that enormous fortress? Yeah, I have to actually get in there and
gather key intelligence on its weak points, if I ever want to reach Paris. I was planning to use the eight minutes of
invisibility to their full effect. My attention was somewhat diverted when I
noticed this enormous castle/mansion. I was nearly 100% sure that it was one of
Louis’s personal ones. To my utter surprise, the guards actually
managed to look through the invisibility potion, but I didn’t actually care. A spontaneous plan had already formed in my
mind. Before the guards trying to encircle me could
react, I teleported up to Louis' personal room and killed his guards. With the two entrances blocked off, I was
left alone in a room with Louis’ wife. If I remember correctly, this is the armor
he usually wore to battle. aaand now it’s mine. I didn’t enjoy interrogating Louis’ wife,
but she eventually told me that Louis was keeping Ekil in Paris’s infamous dungeon
which is located under the largest tower. As fast as I had arrived, I left once again. Although I hadn’t found many vulnerabilities
of the fortress, the armor was well worth the trip and I enchanted it even further. I woke up the next day to the sound of my
archers ringing the alarm bells. I clambered up my lookout tower and immediately
saw the face I had dreaded seeing most. I ignored my beating heart and shouted: Louis,
do you think this new suit of armor suits me? To my surprise, that made him so mad, that
he started throwing eggs at me. That totally didn’t fit his image of a dignified
ruler and he didn’t give up. I felt like something was fishy, so I acted
like I was hit, dropped down the tower, and closed all the gates. As fast as I could, I deployed my archers
and my siege engineers. My intuition was right and Louis had actually
brought his entire personal army with him. They didn’t beat around the bush and immediately
killed all my innocent miners. What posed the greatest threat though, were
the cannons stationed only meters away from my wall. I was fairly confident that the wall could
take a hit or two, but a frontal attack from six cannons? We of course employed the usual tactic of
letting hot liquids rain down from the battlements, but as I had feared, the cannons turned my
wall into swiss cheese in no time and the enemy used the breach perfectly to launch
the first attack. I couldn’t completely patch up the breach
now, it would only be blown up again. I needed to disable those cannons. My surprise attack on the siege equipment
using lava buckets was somewhat effective, but they soon ran out and I got suppressed
by the enemy soldiers. I went back to get more but I was already
too late. The cannons had completely wrecked the wall
and hundreds of enemy soldiers rushed into the camp. Desperate, I tried patching up the wall, but
I couldn’t hold my own against one hundred soldiers. I barely managed to flee and fell into this
pond where the enemies fell over me like wolves. The only way out was by burrowing through
the earth. This time, I successfully planted a lava bucket
in the midst of the siege equipment which turned the already chaotic battlefield into
anarchy. I used that chaos to get back to base and
try to patch up the breach. I constantly had to fend off enemy soldiers
and explosive shells and only barely fixed it. While the soldiers inside my base were focused
on killing my men, I started assaulting them. Soon I realized that even with them being
focused on killing my men, one blade simply couldn’t beat them all. So, in the heat of battle, I decided to found
a new battalion, the diamond fist. I grabbed all the diamonds I had, crafted
all the equipment, and then it was time to test my men in battle. Strengthened by the call to defend their families,
they made short work of the men inside the castle. It was time for a counterattack. Together with my men, we opened the gates
and stormed outside. You can bet that we drove them out like the
dogs they were. I left my men stationed back home in case
it was a ploy and followed the fleeing Louis. Our battle lasted for an entire day, each
of us not willing to admit defeat. I first thought that Louis was once again
trying to catch his breath when he disengaged and ran towards a nearby mountain. To my utter shock and horror, he actually
activated a pile of explosives nearby. I first thought that he was going to commit
suicide, but to my absolute shock, he actually survived and escaped. Although it was disheartening, continuing
to pursue would be pointless. I spent the following days, retrieving the
left behind cannons, requipping all my citizens, and otherwise fixing up the base. I also added additional turrets and thickened
up the wall. My soldiers obviously needed a reward for
their perseverance, so I gave each of them a shield. To conquer the fortress, I also needed a bigger
army which is why I killed more animals and crafted more soldiers. It took me quite a while to equip all the
soldiers and craft enough ammo, but I was finally ready to bring down the enormous fortress. I first took out this troublesome outpost,
then started burrowing into the foundation of the base to get a sense of the layout. I spotted this giant trebuchet and quickly
scurried out of my underground tunnel to destroy it. Now that the garrison of the fortress is thoroughly
in chaos, I executed the second part of the plan. My initial plan was to burrow my way up this
tower. With my siege equipment, I could rain down
bolts on the garrison. But the focus fire of the archers was heavier
than expected. Instead, I dropped down to the courtyard and
burrowed into a random wall to set up base inside the actual fortress. Defeating the enemy from within. I hit the jackpot this time and actually directly
entered the treasury. After getting all the noice loot, we stormed
the courtyard and their main tower. I set up a few cannons to keep them suppressed
and just before launching the attack the food ran out. So, I first had to disable all the siege equipment
one by one as it posed too much of a threat to my men. I then burrowed my way back out and got food. Under the cover of my men, I bashed down the
gate guarding the inner part of town. An explosion actually opened the way to a
wicked dungeon, but Ekil wasn’t kept here. While going through the houses, I actually
stumbled upon the lord of the castle - The infamous black knight. His name alone would strike fear in the heart
of any enemy knight. Yeah, I just let him bash his sword against
my shield which would then make him fall down the stairs. After ages, he finally broke his neck on a
tumble. His wife didn’t seem to like that and she
attacked me. Her shouts were sort of masculine, but I only
restrained her nonetheless. I gave their daughters a sincere apology once
again. Seemed like I had to do that a lot recently
and continued my search. Slowly, I made my way through the last unexplored
tower. I can’t describe to you the jubilation I
felt when I heard the barking of dogs. I followed the sound, only to find one of
my unnamed hunting dogs. Wait I can still hear another dog, maybe this
is … ? No, it’s only the other unnamed dog. I am happy, but am I? Ah, don’t look at me like that. I like all of my dogs equally. I just have a soft spot for Ekil. I was kinda surprised when the two of them
had a baby right in front of me after I rescued them, but hey I don’t judge. It’s just a bit weird. Ekil wouldn’t do something like that. Ah fine, I resurrected all my men and got
all the loot. I can already envision hundreds of uses for
this poison gas I found. I somehow lost the baby wolf while collecting
soldiers that had started wandering off, so I put out a search notice. When everything had been sorted out, I set
out to gather slimeballs for my final attack on Paris. Today was the day everything would fall into
place, the day of reckoning. I first took care of the guards stationed
outside the town and started deployment of the troops. I did that just in time as well as Louis actually
started dropping explosives on our position. Luckily, the archers managed to drive him
off. I continued fortifying my position using all
the siege equipment I had - All to make it look like I was going to attack them head-on. Finally, I towered my way up under constant
fire from the ballistae. One of the many potions I had prepared actually
came in clutch when I had to get back to the ground to get the rest of the materials. My Redstone engineer IQ is already close to
ten, but building Redstone while being bombarded by Louis cannons was borderline impossible. After days of constantly having to patch up
my little platform, I had finally finished this masterpiece. It was time to execute Mission gas gas gas
gas. Bap, bum, pow. Outplayed, the blindness effect should keep
him occupied for a while. Now I just need to find the entrance to the
prison. Using some poison gas, I finished of the town
guards. Hehe, you guys feel stupid now huh. Can’t do anything because you can’t stab
through the slits? Ah, sorry guys, I rethought what I said earlier. I didn’t even mean it that way. Come on we can come to a peaceful resolution. Sike, you thought, I am just going to block
off myself then heal up and … *sound of hitting table* This was a setback, but I hadn’t yet lost. I died over and over trying to approach the
city. Finally, I just decided to use up my diamonds,
craft new armor and use my brains for once. My stuff was already gone, but I was determined
as ever to save Ekil from the dungeon. Using some big brain moves, I managed to get
rid of the guards as well as get some food. All the horrendous equipment I saw only made
me speed up my step. When I heard the bark of a dog, I rushed towards
the main room and … there he was. Some sort of giant demon was guarding the
cage, but he was luckily stuck. Tears of joy were running down my face. Finally. What, what the? What was that just now? Where do you go Ekil? Louis? What are you ?? No!!! An indescribable mix of confusion, fear and
anger rose in me. I had no idea whether this had been Louis'
plan from the start, whether I should have brought my army or whether I should have attacked
at all. Only one fact remained: Louis had just killed
Ekil. He had to pay for that. Both of us threw all of our might against
each other. After our swords had already gotten dull from
the abuse, Louis fell by my blade. At first, I felt empty when I looked at his
remains and the place where he had died. Then I remembered that some of my men were
still fighting outside to distract the city garrison. With a heavy heart, I got back out of the
city through sacrificing my life, then gathered my men and left. On my way, I stumbled across this fellow. The only explanation I could come up with
why the guy was there is that it was the baby wolf I had lost previously. It’s kind of ironic that being lost saved
his life. Back home, I created him this dog hut and
promised myself that I would never let harm come to him. I could stop conquering cities all together. I named him, like by the way. Ah, editing Leo here. I just found out that the dog is most likely
a wolf I abandoned in part 1 during my chicken search. So, yeah. Kinda sad and happy? If you are still watching, let me tell you
a secret. We didn’t land Louis explosive escape on
the first try. *Elytra explosion outtake*
