You CAN Have Financial Freedom!

nine eight seven six five four three [Music] live from the headquarters of ramsey solutions broadcasting from the dollar car rental studios it's the ramsey show where debt is dumb cash is king the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the bmw as the status symbol of choice i'm dave ramsey your host thank you for joining us open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five that's triple eight eight two five five two two five dr john baloney ramsey personality is my co-host today we invite you to be part of the program and i'll be answering your questions he's author of the best-selling book redefining anxiety the highly popular podcast the dr john baloney show where we talk about he talks about mental health boundaries relationships things that are going on so you can weave those questions into uh the show today if you want he's here to help and i've always got an opinion i'm an expert on my opinion the phone number triple eight eight two five five two two five delaney's starting us off in fort wayne indiana hi delaney how are you hi dave i'm good how are you better than i deserve what's up well my husband and i own 10 acres of property that our current home is on and we are considering parceling some of it off and building a new property a new home on that and my husband and i are just having a hard time kind of swallowing the idea of spending that much on building a new home so we were just kind of looking for some personal advice as far as is it appropriate for us to spend that much money okay well there's one of two things is telling you this either emotion uh from all the years of frugality to get to where you are and so the facts are not that you cannot afford it meaning you can't afford it or you're getting ready to build too much house and that and the arithmetic is telling you that and you just need somebody say it out loud for you okay so how much money are you going to spend on the house um probably about 800 000. okay how much money do you have um well between equity and our home um we probably have around 250 000 in equity and how much in your nest egg um about like you mean our like your 401k is your retirement your house yeah yeah um about probably about another 250 000 okay and how old are you i'm 32. oh okay and uh what's your household income about 350 000. okay well the guideline that we use is that can you afford to put the house on a 15-year fixed rate where the payment is no more than a fourth of your take-home pay and so the answer to eight hundred thousand is yes you can do that yeah now okay here's the trick 15-year fixed rate and a plan to go ahead and get it paid off with your fabulous 350 000 income even faster than 15 years the average millionaire in the ramsey research that we did 10 000 of them we studied pays off their home in 11.2 years so i want you to knock this thing out you have a fabulously large shovel your income is amazing what do y'all do i'm a nurse practitioner and my husband is a cpa you're both going to keep working yes you will what's wrong with your current house well we have four small children so we don't have quite enough bedrooms and um just like they're mostly desires we could we could definitely make it work um but it's mostly just you know desires for a little bit extra and that's where we're like you said we've been living frugally for so long um and now it's like okay are we okay with with taking this next step and spending this kind of money or should we you know use it to benefit in other ways now you said equity in your home is your current home paid for um no we have about 250 000 would you sell that property off when you do this yes we would good okay yeah then i i would do this okay uh now the the trick is four little kids you can't call me up and go oh we decided to cut our income in half because i'm gonna stay home yes yes and another we pay about forty thousand dollars a year in child care i know so in about three three or four years that won't even be you know on our budget at all so that's another area that we'll gain uh more cash flow too well the the the key part of this equation is just your income to your payment and you can make that work and not just make it work it shouldn't be any trouble at all and uh then you just keep working your baby steps but as you as you find money in your budget you're gonna keep working baby steps four five six four is 15 of your income into retirement five is kids college and six is all the other money we scrape together from something that any other money that comes up bonus money increases in income whatever's all gonna throw it at the house this house is gonna get paid off in sooner than 15 years and that's the pattern that you want to be on that that's where all the data points lead us and so specifically you would take that 250 put it against this house yeah so now we're at 550 yes and i'm looking at that against my 325 000 of your salary that's easy yeah that's a simple math yeah 15 15 year fixed rate and where the payment's not holding on a fourth of your take on pay you're easily gonna do that yeah and so they can reach over and knock that thing out pretty quick it just uh it is a little bit emotional but also really they're taking on a big chunk of debt yeah because i couldn't tell early in the call whether she like had two million dollars set aside or something i couldn't feel it so uh you know again the facts will lead you to say this is okay but the facts also say you know you have to you have to continue the trek that you're on you can't change direction on and you also have the emotion of selling part of your 10 acre plot and that that's your dirt right and yeah i mean yeah they're willing to do that i think that's that's pretty well decided now when john delaney gets ready to sell a piece of dirt that's a problem this is like the counselor will need counseling uh it will be hard for me to sell dirt yeah yeah you are you are a dirt maniac i do like land i am too i am too i one of my favorite places on the planet is my big old farm yeah ain't nothing on it but some grass and rabbits i remember going out to it the first time bunch of spent shell casings that's i went out there where's the oh no this is and i thought oh this is a happy place man there's nothing else here that's incredible nothing else here just a big old piece of dirt and somebody needs to hold the rest of the earth together and that piece of dirt does it so that's why i'm here that's my uh my calling no i'd have a hard time parceling but again everybody does their thing but uh you taught me this um when you start playing with bigger shovels and you start playing with bigger zeros and it really leaning to those ratios is important yeah it is a little bit like you know your trauma formula facts are your friends yeah yeah okay what's really going on not what's the emotion right you know and what's really going on is you do it you do the math and you know you look at a projection on that and you look at the facts and then you say okay why am i scared yeah why am i ashamed why then do i have these negative feelings when all the math indicates i shouldn't do you still if i go look at a new truck i still have a number from the first time i looked at a truck back in 97 and i look at new trucks now and i sound like a grandfather like what do they do you know what i mean because in my head it should be 17 grand you believe they charge them for a pickup that's a girl right yeah you can it just stays here your grandfather coming out of your own mouth i love it your great grandfather my great granddad yeah with these prices my tire [Music] one wheel that's all i can afford one wheel uphill both ways in the snow this is the ramsey show [Music] stop paying your overpriced wireless provider and switch to pure talk they use the same network as the larger providers for much less for just thirty dollars a month get unlimited talk text and six gigs of data with no contract the average family saves over seventy dollars a month by switching to pure top just go to puretalk.com and enter the promo code ramsey to save 50 off your first month pure talk simply smarter wireless [Music] so [Music] well if you listen to the show much you know we love our debt free screams they're fun a lot of times there's hardly a dry eye in the places these folks tell their stories but none tug at your heart like the ones we get where a mom or dad has passed away and now their family's debt-free because they took care of business and they had term life insurance in place before their spouse passed away now that will make you cry for sure and that's what it looks like when you have your act together your family is taken care of in the good times and in the bad insurance is your defense investing is your offense you gotta play both you're gonna win and it's why it's not okay to put it off you gotta get term life insurance inflation you do it right now and we've made finding a policy really easy for you with our term life calculator you can answer a few questions and give us a snapshot of your life and our free calculator will show you how much coverage you really need which ends up being about 10 to 12 times your annual income on each of you and how long you need to keep the insurance in place and all this takes less than five minutes and it's completely free and you find the best policy compare rates with zander our trusted partner and they'll shop a dozen plus top insurance companies to find the best deal for you it's easy to get your results completely free text term life to 33 789 term life two three three seven and find the best policy for you in a couple hours john deloney my co-host dr john dolone and i are going to be doing an entree leadership theme hour and if you would like to participate in that meaning you have business questions can be anything about business that you want to talk about people issues marketing issues money issues ideas whatever it is you're struggling with or got questions about in business we're going to take business particularly small business question uh that hour and if you want to participate in that email right now and kelly will make you a part of that hour and just email dave on air at dot ramseysolutions.com dave onair ramsey solutions dot com and uh we'll get you on the entree leadership theme hour coming up in a couple hours so jump on there and make sure you do that open phones at triple eight eight two five five two albert is in austin texas hey albert how are you i'm doing good how about you dave better than i deserve what's up so basically i have about 140 000 in student loan debt between me and my wife we make about 140 grand a year and we basically are in a position where we can either make monthly payments of 1400 a month and pay off all our debt in 10 years or we can enter into a repayment plan put about the maximum into our 401ks and essentially pay zero dollars for the first five years and then after 20 years potentially get everything forgiven so i'm trying to see whether we should just start to pay it off completely or whether the repayment plan could have some benefits that you know allows to save money and invest earlier because you know compound interest what's your degree in so i have a master's in finance and my wife she has a bachelor's of science in nursing i saw that one coming okay albert um i don't know what uh the greek word for irony is but i think it's finance degree oh in 140 000 well done man you're a smart kid aren't you well it most of it was actually for me so before i got my master's degree we had about 70 grand and then that program cost about an extra 70 000 but it did increase my um income by about 30 so i saw it as worth it so you increase your debt load by 100 and your salary by 30. yeah but the the amount of time it would take to you know kind of get that 30 increase in my regular career which was i did a bachelor's in accounting which took me about five years so i saved five years of time trying to move up the ladder by just going to school one year okay i i have a degree in finance as well and people that are wired like me and you uh have a tenant well you've ever you've always heard that your greatest strength is your greatest weakness right albert yeah and my i have a couple of tendencies because of my uncanny ability with math i'm very good with math and you are too i can tell because everything that you've talked about since you got on the phone is all about mathematical analysis and so the uh you and and john's right you're obviously a very bright guy those things are actually going to work against you in this conversation though um and because they've worked against me in my past and so being the old and older nerd of the two of us in this conversation i made the mistake of thinking that i could measure all issues like risk and strain and relationship messes with a math formula and you can't and so for instance in the formula that you just used to uh justify your master's degree you did not have anything in that math formula for the extra risk you took on with a 70 000 extra weight all you did was just look at a simple roi and so you left life variables out of your formula called risk and thereby would have neutralized some of your mathematical conclusions but you learn that after risk knocks your freaking teeth out a couple of times and then you go okay the math formula missed that and that's what happened to me so and has more than once and so we need to do the best we can do with a mathematical analysis but what i'm going to urge you to do is to realize earlier rather than later because it hurt me i brought pain into my life that math uh does not measure common sense math does not measure risk very often there's a few places you can actually use a beta an inverted formula and you know what i'm talking about on an investment albert but but there's very few times that people actually plug risk into these equations uh which makes sure which makes our math naive it's it's um it's uh emotionally immature does that make any sense and so all of all of that to say no do not stay in debt 20 years and try to screw around and get rich with your 401 k while you do three versions of a two-step twirl around hoping some political thing is going to come along and bail your butt out of this ridiculous hole you dug yourself into no you take your 140 000 income and you punch this mess you made in the mouth and you get rid of this student loan as fast as you can because all the data that we have on millionaires says that none of them not a single one and as we studied 10 000 of them and this is statistically significant not a single one said i'm going to keep my student loan around as long as i can and dance with it so that i can invest in my 401k and it will offset and i understand mathematically how you got there but dude naive doesn't even touch this conversation please set the pencil down and go and just pay off your student loan get visceral emotional about it and get rid of the mess quit walking around proud about the fact you've got it it's a it's a mess now go fix it here's what it looks like in real life you got a wife it's a nurse albert you have a finance job as dave said there's any sort of correction in the market and they call you in because you're new and you're young and you're gone and suddenly your five-year acceleration turns into a seven-year deceleration that's number one right so and you're going to say that never happened to me i got a graduate degree cool live in that world step two is your wife who's a nurse after year seven says i cannot do this anymore the secondary trauma is wearing me out or you have a kid and you end up with twins and she says i want to stay home or or or one of them has needs you are yeah one of them's got special you are hedging a 10-year bet and i don't know if you know anything about the last 10 years i'm not betting nothing except the the turtle's gonna win every single time and i'm gonna take the the the small stuff and the smart step this is not a math problem it's a psychology don't try to spiritual trick life with a mouse formula yeah you're gonna get your face smacked off don't do it pay it off three years man three years three years you need to be debt-free in three years and then move on with your life [Music] life is full of firsts as the first and longest serving christian health cost sharing ministry chm has shared medical expenses for its members since 1981. we believe you should have the freedom to focus on your health while being supported by a community of believers giving you the opportunity to create many more firsts [Music] [Applause] [Music] dr john dolone ramsey personality is my co-host today open phones at 825-522 jordan and andrea are on the line in canada i see on my screen you guys are debt-free congratulations hi thank you we are way to go how much have you paid off we have paid off 129 575 in 26 months and your range of income during that time we started at 60 000 and we are at about 135 000 now 60 to 135 so uh did like somebody get a job that didn't have one how do you double your income in two years yes we were on a single income while my husband went 1500 kilometers away to school i supported both of us on one income and then he came home from school and he has been crushing it ever since love it got a new job what's his degree in uh he is a funeral director and what what's a field direction funeral director funeral oh i thought i thought what field does he do and what okay in funerals yes that would be the field yes that's right okay and what do you do i'm a nurse awesome wow and what was the debt the 130 000 oh you name it we had uh we were totally normal we had a truck we had a lease a pension buyback from maternity leave we had financed a water system for our house student loans uh credit cards line of credits you guys are like normal totally normal wow we're happy to be weird now what was the wake-up call that got you so intense to knock this out so quickly uh for me jordan was away at school and he had about three weeks left in school and we had burned through all of our savings and i said you gotta come home and work and he only had three weeks left um and that was just our absolute rock bottom and i was so blessed to have um a friend named sarah on instagram who um she took the time to sit down with me and do a facetime call and teach me how to budget and use the every dollar app and then i got started we read financial peace and total money makeover and we never looked back and you made it through the three weeks alive huh yeah he almost didn't but wow wow so earlier today we took a call from somebody who is interested in playing a finance game with their about a very similar debt number two years for about a decade to 20 years on the other end of other side of having this all paid off put into words what it feels like to not owe anybody anything relieving yeah it's um you know all the money that we have is is our money and we can do whatever we want with it and um you know it's a huge weight off our shoulders it's just it's so hard to put into words um the type of emotional emotions and feelings that we have but that would be the the best that we could put into words is it's just absolutely unbelievable and such a big relief for our family the horrible part of your story is also the most beautiful part of your story when you completely emotionally hit the wall at that three-week mark and three weeks from him coming home and uh what that does is you will never go back never never because of that feeling in your chest versus now there's not an elephant standing on your chest anymore that's right and you know no no regrets i'm so happy that um this happens to us when we were in our 20s and now we can move forward it would have been nicer to happen in our teens when we could have learned and moved forward a lot quicker but no regrets um just so blessed and so thankful that we were able to come across you and your team it's just been unbelievable 130 000 paid off in 26 months people are listening going okay what did they do what do you do what's the key what's the key for you sticking with it yeah sticking with it uh it was the hardest but most gratifying process um the hardest part for us was getting started like with anything else getting started educating ourselves and getting that written budget down it was a whirlwind but it was worth every stressor every you know every transaction we made putting that in that trend uh that app i still do that daily i was just doing that before this call um not a day goes by that we don't track our budget it's an absolute must amen hey man jordan what about your current line of work where you're a director what's that story what about that line your new line of work puts a little bit of urgency into the everyday yeah i mean it's it's definitely different than what i'm used to but it was a welcome change and along with new financial responsibilities it really molded together nicely but you get you get a ring-sized seat into knowing at the end of the day where this all ends right you're a funeral director and so the folks i know in that in that world tend to have a little bit better grasp of the importance of every moment of every day of the relational costs right yeah exactly i mean we're all going to end up in the same place so yeah yeah way to go you guys are studs man you guys are amazing thank you yeah so i suspect the second part of your sentence a while ago on andrea is um the uh very hard to get started but then every month and every death that went away it got easier and easier and easier to where the whole thing like was on a curve to where it went from very hard to ridiculously in a zone yeah absolutely and you know now it's become a hobby um now it's not challenging we it's it's habitual we do it every day we talk about it every day every transaction and now it's it's just life and it's amazing yeah it's part of the who's going to pick up the kids and where's the money and where does it go yep that's it tell me where it went that's what i want to know i love it you guys are amazing well we've got a copy of uh the legacy journey for you because that's for sure you've changed your legacy and that's the next chapter in your story you're going to be off to the land of millionaire now and and beyond and uh infinity and beyond it's the buzz lightyear of finance so yeah you're on your way and uh also a copy of the total money makeover for you to give to someone like the friend uh gave you her time and love off of instagram to step onto every dollar budgeting app and help you get going on that i'm very well done so great job thank you so much jordan and andrea from canada 130 000 paid off in 26 months making 60 to 135. count it down let's hear a debt-free scream ready three two one [Applause] [Laughter] i love it wow you couldn't have lined those numbers up dave between that and the last call oh yeah or a few calls ago right the almost the exact same income and the exact same amount of debt and his wife was a nurse and she i mean it lines up so you've got one person trying to finagle the math between ten and two decades now ten years or two decades or somebody who had that call right it's just it's a good warning for all of us that are math nerds that are really good with math is a is a wonderful blessing but it causes you to try to hide the pee under the shell and uh and think you can and and we have a little bit of arrogance in our approach to it that we think we can do it because the math works with the calculator i can i can i mean i i you you know the regular math guy can't do that but i think i can hide this pea but the stinking peas under one of those shells that's a problem it you know it's just a street game at the end of the day so yeah it's tough tough this is the ramsey show [Music] [Music] [Music] dr john dolone ramsey personality is my co-host today in the third hour we're going to be talking to business owners and leaders for an entree leadership theme hour if you have a business question go ahead and email kelly right now and she will put you into that hour oh you can just call call okay just call in now if you can get through the lines are full but anyway if you get in she'll get you set up for that third hour if you've got a business question the phone number triple eight eight two five five two two five couple of other show notes and things that are going on we're continuing to uh do shows about the americas what is what one guy calls america's greatest legalized fraud timeshares and uh yesterday i took calls for an hour from people the stories are just they're they're humorous because they're so freaking ridiculous give me one like a saturday night live skit so um if you're a time share owner or a time a former timeshare owner and you'd like to take this survey we're doing some research on the industry text timeshare to 33 789 timeshare to 33789 and if you want to participate in our next timeshare show meaning you want to tell your story about your interaction with the timeshare business let 20 million plus people hear your story we'd love to have you do that uh you can again use the email dave on air at ramseysolutions.com put time share in the subject line put a little bit about what's going on and your phone number and kelly will call and set up we don't tell you what to say but we need to get you scheduled for that particular hour so tell me tell me what you heard tell me one so the funniest one was the guy who uh i think the timeshare was in in the virginia area if i remember right and uh the guy came running in to do the presentation room full of people and late and jumped up on stage and goes i don't even know what i'm doing uh the guy that's supposed to do this isn't here and so i'm going to be your guy which is a complete bit oh that was part of the game it's part of a bit okay and wally's and he's talking about how if you uh if you love your family you will bring them on vacation because families that do vacations you know they stick together and it's it's a loving act and if the only people who don't take their family on vacation is just don't love their families and while he's saying this the his phone rings and he answers the phone while he's on stage and it's his his mother who's getting chemo and she's calling in no way not his mom at all just another bit and so you know it's just like this is like a saturday night live skit this is like something you would like chris farley down by the river you know i'm at work how does what work so like so i i you know i'm writing a book right now you looked at an early part of it and there's a true story in there and you say the way that true story lines up metaphorically is almost too good to be true and so you and i are reading this like i experienced this we're reading it but we both see it coming 100 miles away how does somebody in an audience not realize bozo man well the guy calling he was like he said my wife and i are at the back laughing okay rolling our eyes but he said there are people buying every bit of it you know they're like a bass on the hook baby i mean anything that's shiny you go for it right and so wow yeah it's uh the old uh was it w.c fields or barnum one pt barnum says suckers born every minute that's right you know i think let me show you a little swamp land in florida here baby and i guess you've got modern baseball in florida is called uh timeshare that's what it is that's what it's called and why do you go the one that i can't figure out anybody of any level of naivete why you actually go and spend five hours with these slimy people trying and think you're gonna get out of there with your skin intact me and my closest friends after about two and a half hours were like hey you know that's enough for you like yeah i can't do five hours and you know and i had a granola bar and an orange juice and my blood sugar is getting low i'm getting ready to kill something here and it may be you but yeah it's like yeah yeah but it people do it they do anything for a free something and that's what it is i'll give you a free pass to the zoo if you'll go in the tiger cage and pat the tiger for three hours so one of the things and pray you don't get eaten right you get to go to the zoo if you live through it i used to do when i talked to parents of new students coming into college i would say hey and your kids get free counseling and by free i mean you give me 120 grand and they can have 12 free sessions a year and uh so if you give me 100 thousand bucks you can come to my house and use my laundry machines for free laundry if you want so if you are thinking about a time share how about this um you give me a quarter of your annualized investment and i'll let you come stay at my house for a few weeks a year how about that that's a good trade i'm in i'm in careful somebody i know they will i guarantee you they will chris is in los angeles hey chris how are you i'm doing great how are you guys good how can we help awesome so i'm single i'm in my late 30s i'm in baby steps four through six um i've not been contributing to my 401k for the past 14 months because i was out of work and just piling up cash from unemployment and severance um fast forward used a bunch of ken coleman's resources for resumes interviews landed a new job and so i've restarted my 401k roth contributions now that i'm working again wait a couple question is awesome yeah thank you thank you very much can ken's ken's resources are awesome if you're looking for a job everyone should check that out thank you um so my question is should i increase my contribution amount above the recommended 15 to help make up for the 14-month gap or just keep it at 15 and just focus on the road ahead that's a great question well um neither neither answer is in the dumb column okay because in either case you're going to be in great shape right yeah so uh the way i look at it is this um you did exactly what you were supposed to do you piled up cash and stopped your baby steps to survive the storm and now we're pushing play again which is 15 of your income towards retirement and taking care of kids college if that's applicable and paying off the house baby step six do you owe money on your house i'm renting right now so i'm in monetary markets so pile of money might be your down payment fund then and it can yeah it can sit there for a little while until you're ready to buy and you know you don't have to buy today but that's until when you're ready to buy it's still sitting there so here's the thing um if we unders you need to if you understand this idea it'll tell you it doesn't matter which one you do but it doesn't matter if you don't do an additional i wouldn't do an additional i just keep it at 15. here's why you're not going to be in baby steps 456 for the rest of your life you're only going to be in four five and six until the house is bought and paid off at which point you will escalate you will no longer be doing baby step four 15 you're going to max out all retirement at that point uh to keep the government's hands off of it and you're going to increase your investing because you're going to be a baby step 7 you'll increase your generosity you'll increase your investing uh because that's what baby step seven is build wealth and give and so um uh so there's a better than half of your remaining working years will not include a house payment and you will be doing much more than 15 percent so it doesn't really matter if you go to 20 now because you're still going to be over there in that baby step 7 land investing way more than 15 in the back half of this story to where you're going to be just fine so i wouldn't i would just stay at 15 and i'd let that money you piled up i would hold it aside for a down payment above your emergency fund uh and then just keep moving right along and then when you buy the house your next goals get the house paid off and when you do that you're at baby step seven and then the 15 no longer applies i love that question it's a really good thoughtful thing but um the thing that that we all have a tendency to do um with the baby steps or anything else is we say okay if i invest 15 of my income for 30 years well you're really not going to do that you're going to invest 15 until you're done because your income is gonna change right so you and we don't know what but it's most of the time most people's life is gonna go up okay uh it may go down and then go up but it's it's gonna all the average the trend line is going to be upward so we don't know exactly how to project that so if you run your numbers at 15 only on only today's income you're more than okay there but guess what it's all upside from that that's right because you're an a when you get out the backside you're not going to be doing 15 anymore b your income is going to go up so it just doesn't work out in linear fashion that puts us our the ramsey show in the books our thanks to john deloney my co-host james childs our producer and kelly daniel our associate producer [Music] have a friend or family member that needs a daily dose of ramsey advice in their life let them know about the ramsey call of the day podcast it's a quick hit of advice about life and money in under 10 minutes check out the ramsey call of the day podcast wherever you listen to podcasts [Music] live from the headquarters of ramsey solutions broadcasting from the dollar car rental studios it's the ramsey show where debt is dumb cash is king and the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the bmw as the status symbol of choice i'm dave ramsey your host thank you for joining us dr john dolone ramsey personality is my co-host today he is the host of the dr john dr john dolone show where he answers questions about mental health relationships boundaries anxiety and other things that are going on the show is uh it's a wonderful uh success and if you want to participate in his show you can email him at ask john ramseysolutions.com with a question for that show or leave a voicemail and kelly and the team will get back to you they produce that show the number is eight four four six nine three thirty two ninety one but he's here today if you wanna talk to him and the phone number here is triple eight eight two five five two two five triple eight eight two five five two two five courtney is with us in battle creek michigan hi courtney how are you hi i'm wal how are you better than i deserve what's up so i'm a family medicine pa i've been working in private practice and i in a leadership role right now but could foresee possibly an opportunity to buy into the practice maybe within the next five years or so so i guess i'm just hoping for some advice on potentially how to save up to buy into the practice and also kind of what to consider financially and personally making that big of a decision well this situation and a law firm are the two times that i have seen what is effectively a partnership work uh most of the time in business partnerships don't work uh we always with when we're dealing with entre leadership team in business setting we just tell them the ownership won't sales or partnership so uh but you do have even though they the vast majority of these medical partnerships do work uh they work because you've got very very clear clearly delineated rights and responsibilities and processes for death disability uh whatever default uh whatever happens or any of the ds that happen you guys they probably have very good agreement structure and that's what helps them to survive so but you do want to learn about all of that so kind of think about what are the worst case scenarios on everything and how is that addressed when a partner dies that's bought in what happens when they go through a divorce what happens when they go when they don't pay or do their part when they're no longer interested in showing up for work disinterest so disinterest divorce disability they lose the ability to come to work what happens to their shares your shares uh how do you get paid or not get paid what is your requirement to participate and so it's it is a bunch of d's it's divorce death disability disinterest default drug use you know all these what are all that stuff people tricks people can do dummy yeah every once in a while partner just is a dumb one that's just got a dumb dumb one okay i'm just trying to think of a good deal jump in here feel free john so uh but that you know that that but my guess is when you do investigate that and understand it you're probably going to find it's probably well thought out where in most two guys opening a heat and air store uh heat and air company it's never thought out and so that's where the disasters all come from but these but you guys are in a world that's very well developed in that area so that's thing one thing two is the way you save up is you say this is so important i'm gonna save up i mean i'm gonna i'm gonna treat this like i'm paying off my house i'm gonna pile up cash so fast and we're gonna live on nothing so that when this opportunity comes i can write the check because i'm not going into debt to do it i'm not good yeah not going into debt to do it uh yeah absolutely not so um and and then the the last thing is that um it is what the voting and governance structure is because you're going to be uh a minority shareholder you're not going to have the ability to vote by yourself and tell everybody what to do because you don't have 51 percent and how the voting process or the governing process works here because you do not have the ability to just stop something you don't have a trump card you don't have a you can't just stop bad things from happening and they're happening where you just paid x number of hundreds of thousands of dollars to become a part of this and you have no control so that's the yeah it's very emotionally uh strenuous to be a minority shareholder because you got really your life savings invested in something you can't control and that that's that's the dangerous part and that's why i tell people not to do it uh except in these situations i have seen you know i don't know what the percentages are but the vast majority are successful so uh versus other types of partnerships so i'm not going to tell you not to do it and were eyeing your shoes i probably would do it but with cash and i just need to understand uh the secret to happiness is uh lowered expectations i need to understand what happens in all the worst case scenarios including me getting out voted on something because they want to take a political stance with this that i'm perpendicular to with our whatever procedure internally we want to make a public statement uh that's perpendicular to my belief system uh and now i'm part of it because i'm an owner in this your name's on the back and i can't keep it from happening so those are the kinds of things you've got to kind of address and and you know if they're not written parts of the documents at least set your own expectations on them because when it turns sideways you know i took this risk on is there any rule of thumb for pricing out a buy-in like this you know it's some net present value it is it's it it's an noi thing in our net operating income so the income of the practice after everybody's been paid is the what the shareholders divvy up and so what are you getting on average if you own one-fifth of the practice i'm gonna it's five hundred thousand dollars i'm gonna get a hundred thousand dollars okay so what am i gonna pay for that usually not more than three or four hundred thousand so you're gonna look at just three to five years now you're you're gonna break even in three years probably and a lot of them break even faster than that okay because there's a a sense that they want to keep her because she's become such an integral part of the practice and so they're letting her buy in at sometimes 50 percent of what a stranger would buy in okay because if you want those partners all knit together because it's golden handcuffs then yeah then she can't just she can't just walk away or she can but it'll be ludicrous financially it becomes golden handcuffs so and for that reason they're usually priced very good for the buyer gotcha very good usually very cool situation to be in yeah it's uh it is again it's a an anomaly in business uh that the medical partnerships but it's important you just said that you don't pay off the front end line you pay off what has trickled through down yeah to the to the shareholder to the owners yeah absolutely i mean that's what all partners gets from profit but you know that's where we are dr john dolone ramsey personalities my co-host today i'm dave ramsey [Music] hey folks i got a great option to help you pay for your education the army national guard the army national guard believes you are the next greatest generation because you have proven that even in adversity that you have what it takes to succeed that's why they offer benefits like tuition assistance career training and a paycheck to help you avoid debt no matter what your goals are the army national guard can help you get there visit nationalguard.com to find out more [Music] dr john dolone ramsey personality is my co-host today if you're struggling to keep up with payments you know what it's like to be so scared and overwhelmed you can't think straight uh you don't have to live like that anymore when you pay off your debt as fast as possible you will never have that kind of stress again and you'll have control of your most powerful wealth building tool your income because you're not giving it to everyone else you know where you do this financial peace university almost 10 million people have been through this class guys and they learned how to pay off debt they learn how to work together if they're married take control of their money start investing you know it's a it is a proven thing you can stream all nine lessons right now or you can get some extra support by going through the class with other people and you know like live and in person remember when we did that and the only way to get financial peace university of course is your it's part of your ramsey plus membership and of course your every dollar premium is a part of your ramsey plus membership so that's the world's best budgeting app so we're going to give you all the tools and the lessons and everything but financial peace university gets you there you can get rid of the death that's holding you back you can learn how to invest learn how to be outrageously generous with a free trial for financial peace university at ramsey plus now free trial ramsey plus text trial to 33 789 text trial two three three seven eight nine our question of the day comes from blinds.com find out for yourself why blinds.com is the number one online retailer anywhere of custom window coverings this is an incredible company great texas company started out of a guy's garage jay is a friend of mine he built the company up and it it still runs with his dna good people free samples free shipping new promos they run all the time blinds.com use the promo code ramsey to get the best deal so today's question comes from victoria in texas victoria writes my fiance will finish his medical residency this year he has 150 thousand dollars in student loans nine grand in credit card debt and no emergency fund when we first met he always said that the best investment you can make is paying off your debt but his priorities have now changed he makes uh oh he makes minimum payments on the credit card deferred the student loans and allocates the rest of his money drum roll please to cryptocurrency i have a little throw up in my mouth it is crazy i promise he promises that he'll start paying off debt as soon as his residency ends but it worries me that he prefers to invest in something that's risky rather than paying off his debt should i be concerned about this new obsession or should i trust that he will eventually make his debt a priority man so anytime somebody says hey this is a important thing for me and you go great and then they change it on you and they do something different and then they say hey but next time but next time you can trust me and then that changes again yes you should be concerned about the integrity of the person that you're walking alongside yes you should be concerned i think i absolutely do actually in fact the more i think about this the more frustrating this gets because you've got a scared fiance here and you've got somebody who has some wisdom in one area of life i think you guys getting this straightened out prior to marriage is a deal breaker i agree um and that's sitting down with your pre-marriage counselor and coming to terms with a uh you're no longer aligned on how money is handled and b uh he's changed his mind i'll tell you what i think has happened and a good spanking in the marriage counselor's office will fix it uh because he's going to get to trade choose between you and crypto um if you're my daughter and um uh so not because i hate crypto but because of this whole the way he's doing this in his whole process so my experience of coaching is uh people with their finances there are more broke doctors medical doctors than any other thing i run into i mean we see all the broke athletes are broke music people they make all their money and then they lose it all but broke doctors hide it behind a bmw with a lease payment and so people don't realize how bad their finances are and when i've sat down with them over the years they're unbelievably suck at how they handle their money that's about to say you get there's an arrogance built in right that's exactly why i can take a heart out so surely i know surely i can do cryptocurrency right and so what i smell is a young medical student who took his class on i am now god i'm a doctor and i know everything and so the he got he got downloaded the arrogant download and uh that a good spanking in the therapist's office will fix that or a good spanking in the market we'll fix it too yeah but i don't want him i don't want to be attached i don't have taken her down you know you don't want to go down with a drowning guy here because he because but here's the thing it's not what he's doing but why he's doing it that's the deal breaker because if i'm right if he is doing if he changed from his common sense when he was humble to now i'm arrogant and so i can play things that other people can't play and i will come out which every time you play in a high risk thing that's that's involved right you have to think you've got the edge on something that no one else does i've got the ticket on this horse so i can bet the farm at this horse race you know and i've got an edge and and because and arrogance is what this is it's pride pride comes right before the fall so the the that's what's the deal breaker because when it's not crypto it's going to be something else it's going to be and it's going to be another thing and he's going to go buy into a pizza chain and that's going to go broke and then he's going to go buy fried pickles and then he's going to do because he's always because he's so freaking smart that is a deal-breaker right because you're going to live a life of bull crap sucky decisions to bullcrap sucky decisions to bullcrap sucky decisions it's just gonna be one after another until this pride is broken i know this guy because i was him as was i that's what i i keep saying victoria i am this guy right i know a lot of stuff about a really small this is how dave ramsey went broke because i am inordinately good with math i can see things i can see a deal i can feel math when it's on a piece of paper i i i'm not good at a lot of stuff but so i could walk into a real estate deal and ding ding ding ding and i can tell you today 35 years later exactly what i paid for that property what we spent on it and what i made on it they just those numbers are stored i can't get them out of my head i i see them they're on a chalkboard in my mind you know and so because i thought i was so such all that uh that i went and built a dadgum house of cards and it came crashing down on guess what my wife and my kids had so i often find when i'm in one of these arrogant modes or when i'm with folks like this and i've spent a lot of times behind closed doors with medical folks um they can feel or sense that deal they can't feel or sense the person they love sitting at them in the driver's seat suddenly feeling like they just their their lifeline just got yep it got got cut right yep and yeah i'm with you the scary thing about this victoria is this is a pattern that i've seen over and over and over and over so if he can become one of the smartest doctors that is humble and realizes he's good at medicine and sucks at money and needs to do basic grandma common sense with money if he can revisit that lying line that's an indication he has become humble and rather than prideful and that is marriage material yeah but it's not the detail of cryptocurrency versus paying off your student loans that's not the detail that's not the deal breaker it's the why under it that is a reason not to marry this guy absolutely until you get this fixed and so that that's because you're gonna you're signing up for a lifetime of heartache yeah and crap falling down around your head because i man i tell you the number of doctors who've earned four fortunes i only have one yeah um with three wives too right yeah yeah and two husbands and you we when we do this stuff when we're arrogant and we we drag our families through the same thing and they they get to go along for the ride and uh you know i say you know i used to say well you know sharon was really afraid when we were going through all this and she would go no the word is terrified not because of the situation because you kept doing it i terrified my wife victoria you're terrified i can see it in on the page here and you should be this is the ramsey show [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] on the phone in denver lane and kaylee are with us hey guys how are you well i guess if i pick up the phone then i could talk to him there we go hey guys how are you we're doing great how are you better than i deserve man i see on my screen you're debt free congratulations how much did you pay off we paid off fifty seven thousand dollars all right and how long congratulations yeah it took 26 months good for you and your range of income during that time time uh we started at 105 000. and currently we're at just over 135 000. good for you and uh what kind of debt was this uh so we had two cars a personal loan one really big credit card and uh cell phones okay cool what do you guys do for a living so i am a plumber and kaylee is a stay-at-home mom and does some property management on the side all right very good yes so how long you guys been married we've been married 12 wonderful years wonderful so what happened two years ago that was the wake up call 26 months ago yeah you know we had taken financial peace shortly before two years ago and it was really great class and we were like yes we could do that but we just couldn't figure it out we would go to financial peace and we'd go out to eat after and because we were like we're so broke so clearly that's what we should do go out to eat right well then just a couple months later we were taking financial peace and i went to file our tax returns and i we pull out all the w-2s and i say we make six figures did you know that elaine's like i didn't know that but why are we so broke if we make six figures so that was really what kind of kicked us into gear filing those tax returns and saying we were making way too much money to be so broke a healthy level of disgust yeah absolutely good for you now they just pop popped your uh family's picture up on the youtube screen right here and i saw it in the lobby how many kids have you got uh we have eight children and we have a ninth on the way in october all right congratulations where'd it go so you fed eight baby birds while you were doing this yes we did wow because sometimes i hear people say on social media when now you know you can't do that dave ramsey stuff if you have a big family it's true it's true i actually admin a catholic large family group on facebook and every time someone would talk about finances i would hear a lot of people say dave ramsey never works or you'd hear the other half say the only thing that works is dave ramsey then all of a sudden all these large families started breaking off into these facebook book groups and saying you know dave ramsey for large families because really it is the only thing that works yeah well i've heard the opposite too so yeah that's interesting all right yeah it's the only thing that works period not dave ramsey but these common sense principles it's not me but the uh and the only thing that works is when you actually work it's you guys are the heroes i'm so proud of you how's it feel to be free it feels amazing honestly um for the first time in our life we're you know not struggling to pay bills or living paycheck to paycheck and for myself um being you know a dad of eight and a husband of a wonderful wife um it's for me it's just exhilarating to be debt free like it's it's so much weight lifted off my shoulders yeah um yeah it's been amazing so what does sacrifice look like in a large family because it looks like you did about two thousand dollars a month average through that 26 months um and meanwhile feeding eight 8.3 kids yeah it was really a lot of lane using his trade and really so many people of our friends and family who referred lane and trusted him and really just sang whoever needs a sink or a toilet or a remodel or whatever needed to be done you know lane that was just really really great about going to work and then going to side job after side job and going to oregon and you know his his work was really fantastic about um when all the lockdown and all of the all of the like quarantine things came in their business actually picked up a lot of they service a lot of restaurants and so we were worried we thought oh restaurants we are dead in the water but there were a ton of restaurants who said hey all those big jobs that we never want to shut down our restaurant for let's do those and so that he was able to stay really busy and truly i mean every one of our friends and and family who hired lane and believed in him and referred him to their friends they supported this journey even if they didn't know it because they supported a family instead of a business and that was huge for us he got so many referrals how did the kids uh participate in this uh well they were you know they they listened to a lot of podcasts in the car not willingly sometimes you know they get a lot of complaints sometimes but um you know they you know staying home a lot eating at home was a big thing you know like katie said we like to eat out and so eating at home was a huge change for them so they uh they were very gracious about it that was very you know they they helped cook so that we when we were exhausted they stepped up and helped cook so that we didn't order food or go somewhere or yeah they were phenomenal and i'm just thinking of all of the generational shift that's just happened not only with the debt profile right but now you've got a dad who works a hard manual job with demanding people who's going to come home a little less stressed and you've got a marriage that's you know a little over 10 years old with basically y'all are about a a kid a year right that's a good turnover right and um there's gonna be a little less stress and over time that it's gonna magnify now you got kids who know how to cook and work together and do fun things and enjoy each other's company and you're talking about transforming a tree with a lot of roots on it right very cool it's not just paying off debt good for you guys very cool absolutely thank you one thing you know about most large families it's not 100 true but more so than uh small families is the kids are not entitled because it's not an option it's very true yeah something as simple as we come out here to take pictures at the break uh if if there's one or two sometimes the kids are running wild but if there's like four or five it's like being with with the military walk right up there like they know how to assume the position for the picture boom and they line up right because hands will come from everywhere and hit you right straighten up yeah so i'm sure they got on board i'm sure they did because they you have to get on board just to stay sane in a house like this this is awesome absolutely i'm so proud you guys are so impressive what a neat family what a great story well done well thank you guys for going out there and winning what do you tell people the key to getting out of debt is sticking to a budget is huge yeah the budget's key yes i would say learning to suffer well as well [Laughter] yeah lane was so great about suffering well the kids really got to see him work really hard and never complain and i was not always i had such a good attitude as lane did and i could just tell i was like even i'm annoying myself even stop complaining it's not doing any good um but the kids will really tell you that their their dad suffers really well he works really hard and he's just the last person to ever complain or or say anything negative he just always keeps us all going and he's made his year yeah that's awesome to hear a wife say that about her husband that's so cool well done it's interesting you know our 13 year old daughter she was really instrumental she would color in all of the charts and every time we get paid where are we at what are we doing how much longer and so i asked her this question and she's 13 years old and i and i asked her what's the you know what's the secret to getting out of debt and she said fortitude that was really so good and i i thought i had to share that touchdown all right lane and kaylee and the team 57 000 paid off in 26 months make it 105 to 135 count it down let's hear a debt-free scream three two one elementary wow school incredible that's amazing how impressive very nice this is the ramsay show [Music] [Music] [Music] dr john deloney ramsey personality best-selling author is my co-host today open phones triple eight eight two five five two two five draylen is with us in columbus ohio hey draylen what's up hey guys how you doing better than we deserve sir how can we help all right so basically um i'm finally in a position now where i can save i've been living paychecks to paycheck since i graduated um two years ago um but the fact that i can save now i have a car loan that is driving me crazy um my car alone i have ten thousand nine hundred dollars left for this car low and the 16 interest rate and i know that's pretty high but the reason i i the reason i accepted it is because i didn't have any american credit at the time right so i figured after a year i can refinance this but because i'm canadian by the way i know that might have sounded a little bit weird but um i i was gonna refinance it but i got approved for it based off my credit but my employment history isn't long enough so i just feel like i'm stuck what's your income um so right now i will be around 40 000 okay and you're working 40 hours uh no now i'm pushing it around 50 hours a week for forty thousand dollars yeah um so i just started um in home renovation and i'm in a labor so i'm a pretty low position i'm working my way up okay but you're paid by the hour 15. yeah you're paid so much an hour so if you work more you get more money yes exactly okay good all right can you get any more hours yeah i can get a little bit more hours but um at the moment i just made a partnership i'm about to launch a landscaping company as well so i'm gonna have more income coming in through that okay good okay and how old are you i'm 27. okay well here's what i would do if i were in your shoes i would say 16 every morning me being charged 16 interest pisses me off yeah and i stay mad all day [Music] you said this is driving you crazy it drives me crazy on your behalf yeah i'm just i'm just hearing it i'm going crazy so if that's the case then i could pretend i could make a pretend thing in my head and say gosh if i don't pay off ten thousand dollars in four months i'm gonna like uh die of a disease or something i mean you know just i mean what if you had to find ten thousand dollars in four months to stay alive you would find ten thousand dollars in four months you would work like 100 hundreds of hours thousands of hours you would not worry about anything except getting 10 000 right yeah that's what i want you to do okay you wouldn't recommend selling the car i would recommend paying your car off in four months because all you do is work and you don't have to worry you're not gonna die from hard work right before you die you'll pass out [Laughter] you're gonna be fine you're gonna be fine because here's the thing uh the good news is you did something really stupid you did it at 27 so you have the whole rest of your life to never do that one again yeah okay and that's the way i look at me losing everything when i was 28 and bankrupting i i you know there's a whole bunch of stupid stuff i did in that story that i spent the rest of my life not doing and consequently have been able to become very wealthy after that because if you can just not repeat the stupid stuff that is an accomplishment for most people in four months i like the idea dave just of putting a 16 in like a marker on your on your mirror every morning yeah it's just like because what you're going to work like an absolute animal yeah i mean you're going to go for but you can do anything for four months especially 27. you know anything for four months it's not four years it's not 40 years i don't want you to be a workaholic i don't want you to be out of balance with your life i don't want you to lose jesus and your kids and your family i'm not talking about i'm talking about four months pay your car off yeah and then you reverse this ridiculous mistake because the car is not ridiculous now if you told me you're 30 000 on the car and you made 40 i'd be going dude sell the car that's just nuts but it's not that expensive a car as a percentage of 40. it's just this glaring what idiot idiot it is it just reminds you every morning that reminds me of my stupidity it's like i get an email every morning you're stupid you know i hate stuff like that and it just it would drive me bananas and so yeah that's that's all i want you to do let this become a healthy righteous anger that causes you to drive through this four months and clean this mess up and that's how i would do it if i can't woke up in your shoes kyle is with us kyle's an amarillo hi kyle how are you hi i'm good good how can we help you so my question was how does okay so like how does a spender learn how to get in the habit of saving just because i i love to spend i have a habit of just spending and spending and spending and i'm since now that i'm 19 i got to get in the habit of saving while i'm young instead of keeping that habit of spending spending spending okay well i'm a spender too so i can relate to that are you a spender saver you're a spender i'm a spender you're a spender yeah sheila's a saver yeah so um there's a couple of things you need a reason to do it a why and right now you don't really have a reason other than this feels like it's wrong but when i went broke and i had to learn okay i know i'm not a natural saver but saving money seems wise versus being broke which is kind of what you're saying kyle right and so how do i do that well what i figured out was most spenders too by the way are generous are you fairly generous yes i love being generous okay so what i figured out is if i invest and save i have more money to spend and more money to be generous so it's like i i have a reason now to save and to systematically save to become wealthy because i can increase my generosity and i can increase my enjoyment with spending yeah and so i can spend now and not think uh anything about it versus spending and having this like financial hangover the next morning wake up with a headache and go what did i do last night practically speaking kyle there's been seasons in my marriage where i literally give my debit card to my wife because i take cash and put in my wallet so when it's gone i it is gone you set yourself a system to protect you from you put barriers in front of me until i it's like bumper lanes at the pool and i mean when you're bowling i'm starting not to pull when you're bowling so that i can learn i need these these guard rails and that's me as a grown-up i should know better partner with a phd in psychology i've got to put some barriers in in front of me so that i can get myself back on yeah put systems in your life that help you uh stay tuned to your goal right and uh you know and so okay my goal is uh i i want to be in that be a be a spender that's who i am but i want to do that with it with wisdom right and my goal is i want to be a saver so what do you do to what has to be true to cause that to happen and you know an example would be an auto draft uh out of your checking account directly into a mutual fund that automatically saves for you see that's a system that turns you into a saver because you might not remember to do it that's why you tell people to cut up their credit cards so you can't right chop them up that's right surgery the same thing works for um your marriage right i got a few buddies that a hundred percent of the time they call they will i know they're gonna ask hey man how's your marriage how y'all doing and there it's it's again it's a it's an accountability it's a check-in how are things going i know that's gonna happen every time we call right and so it's having setting up those systems in your life that none of us are perfect not all of us are trying to figure it out and but i know where i want to go so i know i've got to have these accountability systems in my life i'm so much of a spender that i used to think when you were leaving costco or sam's and they checked your receipt that they were checking to see if you really spent two hundred dollars no you were you want to know if you won that day would you check see if i won is this scratching off the biggest one just the biggest one today no dave sorry i gotta go but yeah i feel like if you don't spend 200 they got they point the finger back into the building and go go get the six gallons a month there was a family of you need six gallons of mustard everyone needs six gallons of mustard and you're not up to your 200 go back in there five gallons of peanut butter 55-gallon oil drums full of peanuts oh this is the ramsey show [Music] this is james childs producer of the ramsay show did you know the ramsay show is one of the most popular podcasts in the world subscribe or follow today wherever you listen to podcasts this is the ramsay show [Music] you can be intentional about your character you can have money and a career you are the hero in your story [Music] live from the headquarters of ramsey solutions broadcasting from the dollar car rental studios it's the ramsey show where debt is dumb cash is king and the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the bmw as the status symbol of choice this is an entree leadership theme hour what that means is we're going to be talking to business owners and business leaders all across america questions about your business how to operate it issues problems even the mental health issue having to do with leadership it's a bit of a strain for the last 18 months for sure uh leaders have been through hell in american business and for that matter around the world and uh you know if you're facing that dr john doloni joins me this hour and ramsey personality and of course uh host of the dr john deloney show where we talk about mental health issues and uh uh so so man we we dave we went to summit which is the premier business leader event that we put on right right and um by the way the phone number here triple eight eight two five five two two five if you've got a question about business particularly in that zone we're gonna kind of concentrate on that zone but we'll take your questions about anything triple eight eight two five five two two five so yeah we go to uh entree leadership summit which is the one of the premier leadership events in the world it is ours but it is legitimately top of the top of the shelf right and the best speakers the best teachers in the world on leadership and on business show up there and uh of course i spoke there of course you spoke there this year it was a pretty incredible event yeah it was really remarkable uh and a lot of that you know is about strategy and how to run your business and how to use data and how to hire and fire those important business things how do you operate this thing and then who are you when you're running it and man i i took a little bit different track and just want to talk about man behind the business owner is just a dad right just a guy trying to run a business and raise his kids and be a community member and or i'm just just a woman who's trying to keep her household duct tape together and then all sudden their community says you're not allowed to go to work anymore and she's got nine employees and i've been overwhelmed just with the response to i i i'm trying to balance all this stuff and man i'm carrying around stuff that from when i was a kid when somebody told me hey you're a loser you're not gonna work it's not gonna work for you and suddenly i look up and i got 17 employees well i'm a business leader now what's that supposed to mean and how do i manage this and manage this and manage that and then this guy comes in and says he's quitting and she's leaving and it's a lot for everybody and you said it best it's been absolute hell and one of the things my i got a cohort of mental health professionals across the country that we interact with each other um we talk and i'll call and ask them questions am i seeing stuff right and we were talking that 2020 was really like taking a two liter bottle and just shaking it up and there was two things that were going to happen people were going to be open that top slowly and let that air out [Music] or they was going to pop the top on that sucker and here we are seven months later after 2021 is kicked off and everybody's out of gas they got nothing left man and then we're not even done with the year yet right yeah we're just watching people fall apart yeah the um fact that we're all human beings and we all carry our stripes we all carry our uh scars yeah as you talked about in that uh talk you know every time you have trauma it's anything little trauma's a pebble all the way up to major trauma traumas a brick in your life and if you don't unpack your backpack and you carry all those bricks and traumas around oh and then by the way just go ahead and have a 20 20. right uh and yeah people are just on their knees even in 2018 you still got employee nonsense i mean you still had all that but somehow you you could function through all that but you were on your last nickel of energy at last your tank is you're using up but then you let's just go and put another weight on it right and try to shut the whole freaking thing down so we talk about this on this ramsey show and you've you've just done like a shapeshifter event over the last 25 years talking to people with about the margin in their life financially if you are leveraged out that the other end of that fulcrum comes due someday right and the same thing works relationally and the same thing works with your body right you got no margin that's right it's just it's it's sandpaper on sandpaper that's right man bone on bone yeah and it uh it's just gonna grind and and so yeah if you're a leader uh that is honest with yourself including me um that's what it's been this year yeah it's like um you know i was doing pretty good leading uh but then it put another thousand pounds on your back and you look at this and you go i don't know what the hell i'm doing yeah right and then and then oh you know what it's and it's the craziest thing dave because then the voice of that coach comes back from 20 years ago and says i told you so or that employee that left 11 years ago and wrote that letter to you you go they say and you're this kind of person you go you are evil see now it's proven right and you start finding proof of your own hurts everywhere you look right and so yeah give us a call triple eight two five five two two five man we'd love to talk to you triple eight eight two five five two two five steve is with us in des moines hey steve welcome to an entree leadership theme hour what's up hey thanks for taking my call sure i uh i so my situation is i'm a 22 year old realtor and i've been in the business for about a year and a half now and through the start of my new career i have been experiencing some new levels of stress that i just haven't experienced before and i don't know how to deal with this stress and it's starting to take some uh negative physical effects on my body yeah it usually does yeah the body's a remarkable uh ledger book it reminds you that you're overdue in some areas so i just started laughing when you said you started your business as a realtor in a year and a half ago i'm trying to think of an analogy that's like saying i got into the aviation business and they put you on the rocket to mars as your first trip right so how's it been man uh you know it's a pretty brutal business to get in um at the time that i did uh the market is just full of realtors in my area so the it's pretty difficult to penetrate but um things have really been picking up for me at the start of quarter two of this year um but before that um paychecks were really few and far between what's going on with your body when you say i'm experiencing stress my body's starting to pay the price for me what does that mean um so i've i've been losing sleep losing appetite and losing weight i have trouble breathing at times and uh experienced some digestive issues as well so what's that all mean i'm smiling because i mean i i don't know about you dave i've been there too like what what what is your body trying to tell you my man um well i think i'm i think it's telling me that i'm put in some positions that i've never dealt with before but i'm i i have to i feel like i just have to fail in order to figure it out but i'm scared to fail and yeah um hey let's do this steve hang on yeah and we're gonna hang on we'll talk to you a little bit more after this break this commercial is bearing down on us and a great question to pay our bills around here because we're dead free and all you know so this is the ramsey chef [Music] what makes our show unique is that we genuinely care about our listeners we're intentional about choosing the best advertisers to recommend blinds.com is no exception they offer high quality window treatments at unbelievable prices and they make it simple to shop blinds shades and interior shutters with easy online ordering free shipping and a guaranteed perfect fit go to blinds.com and take advantage of this week's special savings [Music] [Applause] it's an entree leadership theme hours we talk about business small business and leadership and one of the things we're talking about is the mental health aspects of leadership the things that we all deal with and we're talking with steve in montana or i'm sorry in des moines rather and uh going into the break he was describing to us he's a new real estate agent uh and um the the stress associated with that as it starts showing up in his body's losing weight uh digestive issues can't sleep can't sleep those kinds of things is that a fair summary of what you told us so far steve yep that's correct so man what's stressing you out what about the job is stressing you out so i've identified about three things um the first one is that i have a serious desire to move out of my parents house but i feel like i'm not generating enough income to make that possible the second one is that i can't relax in social settings because i'm too worried about my work and i feel that i i'm nervous that a client's gonna call me and i'm not present at the dinner table or with a friend and lastly i um i'm still learning everything that uh it is to be of the best realtor i can be but i've incurred a lot of failures recently and i'm i replay those failures in my head a lot how old i take them very personally 22. um when you say you've experienced a lot of failures what do you mean um well i think i probably blow it out of proportion and i uh i make it more than what it is but i guess like i think i said the wrong thing in front of a client and now they don't trust me or i uh said the wrong thing and now they're not going to be they're not going to want to work with me anymore and um so i've had that happen before but i think i'm blowing it up a little bit yeah no you probably did it yeah you screwed up but it's not it's not the end of time right yeah you're not gonna die from it but i mean i got my real estate license when i was turned 18. and i can tell you some serious butt stories of some of the stupid crap i said and lost deals between the time i was 18 and the time i was 24. or steve the first time i did radio was on this show and uh you want to know about saying the wrong thing and feeling the radiant heat from dave ramsey next to you oh i'm just kidding it was it was it was a love heat you bless your little heart so hey steve here's the thing um you're you are in 100 fight or flight when you do that your brain has one detective mechanism where's the threat and it begins to identify everything as a threat and you can't sit down you can't sit still you can't enjoy anything and then your body won't let you sleep because that's time that somebody could be sneaking up on you it just starts to loop on you real real quick right so a couple of things you identified here you're not making enough money man right you're running and running and running and you're not making enough money and then when you finally get around somebody you overdo it because you're so tightly wound up and the one thing that's going to help you be well and whole which is hanging out with friends and laughing and putting the business down you're not letting yourself do yeah it's like it's like you you couldn't get a date couldn't get a date you finally got one and you were so excited you screwed the date up right and then when you're surrounded by potential future dates you're just staring at your phone hoping other dates call and you miss the whole thing right so uh i agree let me there's two things pop into my head and see if this matches what you're saying john one is um there's a reality to your situation you are 22 years old and you live with your parents and you're trying to convince someone to do a real estate deal okay neither one of those things are evil being living with your parents or being 22 years old or being 22 years old living your parents any one of those three possible mixes are not evil my point is that if if you're competing with someone who's uh got exactly the same knowledge and experience in real estate that you have but they're 52 you're gonna lose because the guy's gonna i don't mean this mean or anything but the guy behind the house is gonna look and go i'm not going with the kid i'm going with old dog and uh that's assuming everything's equal now if you're better you can whip the 52 year old's butt and get the deal right but you got to be better to do that but you have you are starting because you're young in a uh very expensive commodity business you're starting at a deficit you are you are you're starting with an uphill climb that's a reality and that's okay i told you i got my license when i turned 18. and uh and i sucked and i still made some sales in spite of that and i worked my way all the way through college selling real estate selling residential real estate so when i was your age i was still selling real estate um and coming out of college so i'm not saying you can't do it but having been there i mean it's hard for you to imagine me being 22 but i mean just magnum pi big mustache disc disco suit because it was the only suit i had and so john travolta meets magnum p i sells real estate at 19 years old knocking on your front door to list your house i mean and yet i still talk some people into it that's right so it can it be done yes it can be done but it it from personal experience it's a climb now that's thing one then thing two is the reason i get in that situation loads of anxiety is everything i turn i become a drama queen i turn everything into life or death because my i don't have good perspective because i think that one deal oh god i messed up that one thing and i turn it into a big mountain instead of a molehill and if you pan back and you go in the scope of life this next 18 months is probably not going to define me yeah and that that allows you to chill a little bit so but i'm with john if you were making 300 000 a year you wouldn't have called us right exactly right so this is a stress brought on by not making not succeeding enough to make an income you probably need a secondary career to get some money coming in yeah and that's that's one of the cornerstones man when you someone is completely frazzled out like you and man i've been there i've been there is you got to be real honest with yourself it's a it's a it's a great state right yeah right listen i i i think you're a whole lot better than you keep telling yourself you are but you are also in an uphill climb right that's a reality for a season right that's a fact yeah so hey a couple quick things take care of your body make sure you're exercising eating right man and sleeping do what you got to do if you're hanging out with your friends turn off your stinking phone lose the text message if you're going to spend a couple hours with folks and i know it sounds crazy you got to get an like dave said get a mentor get somebody who's been doing this for a while that will go to coffee you can buy them coffee and it's just going to give you for some perspective and the final thing here talk to yourself kindly be graceful with yourself man the last thing steve needs is steve beating up steve peter is an olympia washington hi peter welcome to an entree leadership female or how can we help hey thanks for having me on the show i appreciate that a lot sure hey dave i have a question here i run a small medium-sized company i started this company on 18 years old now uh seven years later um we're we're running we're going strong i you know i ran into you about them a year ago uh but thankfully i never did have any uh any debt with my business so debt so to speak right i use a credit i use credit cards for my employees um but you know of course i pay the balance off every every month um and i'm not so concerned about the credit card points because what are they buying what do you think uh material supplies at different vendors uh home depot supplies um you know you know we so what's your question my question is how do i run my business for my employees without giving them credit cards you know i had one have debit cards but what about just pulling out of your your checking account you know well that's what it does if you're gonna pay it off at the end of the month anyway you have the money right yeah they would have them no you would i mean if you're going to pay off the credit card that your employee is using at the end of the month that means you already have the money right correct then just use a debit card and let it come out of your checking account because you've already got the money yeah but what about the security side of it you know employees let's just say they go off and play for some dumb reason if they go off and do that with a credit card it's your credit card you're liable even if they ripped you off the credit card company doesn't go oh your employees charged something they shouldn't have charged we won't hold that against you you still have to pay the freaking bill and if you've got something so don't you know you're not getting trust yeah if you've got somebody you don't trust to run a credit card they don't need to be carrying a debit card if they don't trust them carry a debit card they don't even be running a credit card they shouldn't be the exact same thing it's the exact same thing debit card has the same fraud protection that a credit card [Music] so to do it's an entree leadership theme hour this day this hour dr john deloney is my co-host as we talk business owners business leaders from across america with all kinds of questions about their business certainly the mental health aspect of leadership is in play today because we have the doctor in the house if you're a business owner you know problems and issues pop up all the time sometimes there's an easy solution but a lot of times you don't have the answer and if you have all the answers that means you don't have the answer that should be a t-shirt man that was deep maybe you've got an employee who isn't uh working out maybe your top client decided not to renew maybe you're struggling to find the right person to hire uh maybe you're burned up maybe the grind's getting you i get it running a business is hard leadership's even harder but you don't have to do it alone that's why we created the entree leadership advisory groups when you join you'll get a coach and a group of like-minded business owners to help you navigate the challenges of running a business stop doing business alone we are meant for community dr d says that all the time and get answers that you need to lead with confidence get plugged into an entree leadership advisory group to apply for a group text the phrase get advice one word no spaces get advice to 4422 text get advice to 4422 allison is in phoenix hey allison welcome to an entree leadership theme hour what's up in your world hi family sure what's up and my husband and i we are blessed with the opportunity to do summit okay you're breaking you're breaking up you're gonna have to get where your phone's working try one more time allison yeah all right i'll come back to her uh let's go to lee and uh leah in cleveland ohio hi leah what's up hey john and dave it's such a pleasure to talk to both of you you too what's up um so my question is so i'm a small business owner and we've been in business for um it'll be five years in august and kovid kind of you know made us put a ton of our business like online kind of go through all of every make sure everything's really profitable so a year later we're kind of experiencing this like really crazy period of growth where we're growing and we're trying to catch up with hiring and putting processes in place my question is as a business leader that was already kind of exhausted before kovid and then covet happened i feel like it's hard for me to kind of enjoy our success we're in right now because i am just mentally and physically absolutely exhausted all the time and it seems like the seasons kind of even if they change from you're stressed out about not having money to stress out about not having enough people like it's just this constant cycle of exhaustion and i guess i'm just looking for like tips on kind of how to keep the perseverance going that's a great question dave i've got some academic answers to that you've experienced this stop in i'll follow um i think a couple of things happen when you have an explosion of growth two things number one think of this as your harvest season for whatever reason the last five year not for whatever reason i know why last five years y'all set yourself up in a position to be successful the integrity of your business the excellence in your work all those reputation things led to this moment when there was some sort of crisis and it paid off so in many ways your your fields grew a lot more you planted and all of a sudden you got you know two plants per seed right and so there's a there's a part of this where this isn't the moment to celebrate success this is the moment to get out there and work the fields as hard as you can right um i always think of exhaustion differently than fatigue fatigue tired is physical exhaustion is often philosophical it's existential it's that why and what i find with business owners and small business owners and even big business owners is you go from a business of six of us and we are ragtag and this is who we are and we're scraping by and everybody's pulling their weight and then all sudden you look up and there's 15 of you and you're getting a little more of a machine going and then you have to ask yourself a is this what i want this is cool it's everything we thought but it's just a different company now and so you got to stop and acknowledge it and you may have to put new systems in place you may have to ask yourself a hard question do we want to keep taking more clients is this as big as we want to be or if not we're gonna have to get some wisdom like you know dave just just read that we have to get some some coaching and help us level up but it becomes a philosophical question is this what we want to be doing because this is different than what we were even though we're still plumbing still serving customers still doing that we're doing it more of a corporate level we're doing it a little bit bigger we're doing it across the board we're busy or we're later we're missing games now do we want this new life right and at some point you got to stop the flow go go on a retreat go with your top leadership team go with your husband whatever that looks like and say who we used to be and now we are let's talk about that and there's just something about taking a breath and acknowledging it and the word i always use is grief and sometimes we think grief is what you do when somebody dies or somebody gets fired sometimes you just have to grieve the fact that we used to be a small nimble gang of seven of us and now we're a corporation of 50 or a team of 100 and it's just different you grieve it that's just acknowledging that what was is no more and now we're going to lean into what is and then you got to go do what the new thing is right does that make sense it does yeah and i think that's where it's like the pressure of we're not fighting for our lives anymore in a sense but it's like is this what we want and i think that like perfectly states it and it's good but then you feel bad about feeling bad about it no let me tell you where exhaustion comes from in this case because i've been there like eight different times over 30 years uh it comes from the business is running you instead of you're running it yeah who owns this yeah that's a question who owns it you i do yeah you and your husband you own it yes then freaking tell it what to do yeah it's not telling you what to do anymore stop it you got to tell it what to do you got to tell your business to freaking behave you you're killing me here this is like a misbehaving kid you're wearing me out i was putting up grandbabies to bed the other night and they were jumping around and i'm like girls y'all gonna have to go to bed girls you're all gonna have to go to bed girls are going to go to bed and one of them says papa dave's getting frustrated and when my mama gets frustrated it's not good you know and that that's what it is isn't it it's the same thing this business is jumping around on the bed and you told it six times to bathe and and you told me what to do and now you're gonna have to you're gonna have to manhandle this business woman handle this business and uh wrestle it to the ground and make it do what you want it to do you own it you grew it it was grown for you it's for your benefit and the benefit of your customers and so around here that translates like uh when i quit liking when i quit enjoying doing something we do here because i do so much of it i get exhausted at it it's something i formerly like doing but we just wore dave out with it i finally look up and go uh you stupid fool you own the business just look at these people and say i'm not doing that anymore and so i stop doing things i don't like doing and so they all pray i continue to like the thing that they're working on right well but then there's people like me who benefit from that right yeah you better hope i love your podcast that's right that's right but you know it's all it's got we're joking around but that's when i get exhausted when the stupid thing starts running me instead of me running it and i just have to throw my shoulders back and go nip nope nope nope nope so what's what's that means you're going to raise your prices and lower your volume i can run a bunch of your customers off by double your prices and suddenly you'll be peaceful and profitable yeah and i think that's where this like it's a little scarcity mindset of like oh if we raise our prices we won't have as many customers but yeah but you reach a point that i'd rather do that than feel like i feel right now right right absolutely and uh i'm i'm okay if you know and actually there's probably about 10 of those customers are taking up about 90 of your time anyway because they're freaking high maintenance anytime oh i just read your mail okay anytime you think the words but i have to go let me respond to this or they need me to stop and check in with your husband and say that's what we want to be doing yeah right yeah it's just you need to run this business it's running you i think i think a step away from reach over and smack it on the bottom tell it to behave yeah this that was like a paddling i was gonna say i said talk to your husband and you said reach over and paddle it i'm just gonna let that hang there for a minute [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] our scripture today proverbs 17 17 blessed is the nation whose god is the lord the people he chose for his inheritance benjamin franklin said where liberty dwells there is my country so here's the deal we have uh for those of you on entre leadership fans out there we have a free facebook group for you to join if you want to and you can bounce some ideas around there and uh the name of it is entre leadership tribe entre leadership tribe on facebook and so it's a free facebook group that is uh unique to the entree leadership group and you can get in there and bounce ideas around and then that'll lead you into one of the advisory groups probably as well and uh that that's the next step after that a little more formal than just to being in a facebook group bouncing ideas around but we're going to be there to help you either way so check it out free facebook group entree leadership tribe private facebook just for you folks that are doing business out there and want to share in our discussions on that allison's in phoenix i think we got our phone straightened out what's up allison hi so um my my husband and i we were able to go to summit about a month ago which was amazing and we came back with so many things that we wanted to add to our business and we've made a lot of changes um but the problem is i'm still having a hard time separating work and home just because our situation is a little unique what makes it unique um so i i started my business a year ago in march of 2020 which probably the worst time congratulations maybe ever yeah you think yeah yeah your timing sucks two weeks before the lockdown oh my god so i i didn't think it was going all that well until a couple months ago and it's really started to pick up um to the point that i'm i'm passing it off to my husband and i actually have another startup that i want to put all my time and energy to um but i'm training my husband and passing it all off to him and i'm still running okay so what is the unique situation and what's the problem um just that i am working throughout the day we're both working at home and we have basically three businesses um that we're running all out of our house and so we work during the day and then come home and work during the night um which we're totally fine doing for a while but at a certain point we want to have a normal life have kids all that um and it just is taking over our life yeah this is a it's one of those things you say how do you lose weight and you say diet and exercise it's simple but there's a trillion dollar industry right this is a very simple boundaries issue and it's going to be very complex for you to untangle it it's going to take a lot of discipline and a couple of months of learning and practicing how to do this um i'll to give him credit man not just shoot his own horn but dave and his family is a family business um they work together and i've seen him in meetings and then i've seen him hanging out at the house they do it better than anybody i've ever seen but this is about boundaries this is when you and your husband get very specific about when we are working and when we are being romantic when we are trying to solve business issues and then we take that hat off and then we get into building our marriage and relationships otherwise i'm telling you right now i've seen it it will drown your your relationship completely pull you underwater and you won't be able to get back up do you have a physical uh office in the house uh no we we have a one-bedroom apartment so the whole place is kind of the office and the everything okay um then you gotta flip that around yeah meaning you've gotta have your romantic you got to make proximity space you got to go somewhere you need to take one corner of the living room and set a desk over there and or two desks facing each other over there and then the other corner has a television or whatever and you don't have your your business paperwork spread over the coffee table in front of the couch in front of the television and on the kitchen table while you're trying to eat you need some physical boundaries uh because that'll cue your mind oh i just stepped out of the office oh i just stepped into the office and then you all you set each other up accountable and you say uh we're gonna work late on tuesday night and thursday night and monday night is off limits and wednesday night we go on date night and the only time we violate that is if we uh book a really lucrative appointment or something across one of those and then we switch a night meaning that that night we were going to work late becomes the date night and so you just set yourself up on a a rigid schedule to reprogram your brain and try to create some physical space to do that as well because you've got to have some visual cues and one of the visual cues is a clock telling you what time it is it's time to stop it's time to change from business executive to wife change from marketing executive to husband uh it's time to change from production to not working and being at home and that for sure means set any business screens like email and so forth aside screens will screw up your evening more faster than anything else well and they'll violate those boundaries and it may be something as simple as somebody calls the workday over and y'all go take a 20 minute walk alone to read directions yeah recently we come back to the house and now we're married we're not co-workers that's our drive home we went for a walk through and now now a podcast and now that i'm funny now that i'm home i'm dad now that i'm home i'm husband i'm wife um now that i'm home i'm not the other thing and that's what john's talking about that our family has worked so hard on because when we work together all day long on something we love yeah with people we love uh stopping is very hard and really like you know is there such a thing as too much ice cream no actually but work skills right being really good at my job here sometimes makes those skills don't work when i'm trying to be a dad they're different skill sets right yeah it's a different sword yeah yeah you need to take your sword off when you get home put it above the mantle yeah but take your boxing gloves off yeah and uh the one you use at work doesn't work on your family that's right and so take it off and just old fashioned set above the mantel you know put to put the musket we've been out hunting bear all day let's put the musket above the mantel right and uh you don't you don't turn that on your three-year-old that's exactly you know it's a different set of tools and um so yeah that's that's a beautiful question alison i love where you are the beautiful thing is is that you've got the things working um you you two of you in a one-bedroom apartment starting yet another business bothers me it sounds like you like maybe you should focus a little bit instead of being spread so thin but that's a different question and a different answer so it might play into this because you might be trying to do too much with too little uh there's only so many hours in the day as they say and uh but that that's a a way of looking at this so one of the things we did with um i recommended to folks who were homeschooling their kids who were getting those boundaries was something as simple as put a hat on when you're a teacher and when mommy or daddy's wearing the hat they are mr so-and-so are they our teacher and when that hat's off then we're mommy right then we're daddy again and it gives those kids a a physical cue yeah like oh i can go hug and be silly versus i gotta get that assignment done right yeah i don't have to take my uh my mom seriously but i better take my teeth better seriously that's right that kind of thing uh mama let me get away with this but the teacher never would that but it's a visual cue i mean even all the way back to when the dinosaurs roamed the earth and i was in college they um you know they said set your desk aside in an area inside the you're living you know where you're going to live the home you're living in set a desk aside and don't do anything at that desk except study so when you sit down at that desk your brain says okay time to study and the same goes for your bedroom right yeah don't don't do work in bed don't um don't re you know watch crazy movies like the bed is for just a couple of things man and not for work and other things because it's just it's all about the physical spreads you spread your receivables all over the bed that's a bad idea that's right it's not it's just you get it you just uh yeah you're exactly right there's something about our minds that is that simple yeah and it's helpful to just give us track give ourselves tracks to run intentionality is the key there good show john dr john deloney ramsey personality my co-host today that puts this hour this entree leadership theme hour in the books we'll be back with you before you know it in the meantime remember there's ultimately only one way to financial peace and that's to walk daily with the prince of peace christ [Music] jesus hey it's kelly associate producer and phone screener for the ramsay show if you would like to do your debt free scream live on the show make sure you visit theramsieshow.com and register we would love for you to come to nashville and tell dave your story [Music] you

Channel: The Ramsey Show - Full Episodes

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Length: 121min 45sec (7305 seconds)

Published: Thu Jul 01 2021