Yizkor & N'ilah / Havdalah Experience (Sept. 16, 2021)

foreign [Music] oh [Music] so [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] um i love her [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] so [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] foreign [Music] um [Music] [Music] [Music] so [Music] we welcome you to this ysker service of memory and mourning this gist your service which begins with a musical setting of the 103rd psalm on page 546. [Music] so [Music] [Music] oh [Music] [Music] uh [Music] [Music] foreign [Music] is [Music] is [Music] oh [Music] we continue on page 540. [Music] hey [Music] i am [Music] oh [Music] to fear oh [Music] my god [Music] r [Music] oh [Music] page 541 this is the hour of memory and this is our house of comfort wounded by loss we retreat from life our synagogue gathers us in into this place we bring stories and prayers unanswered questions tears that need to be shed lives recollected and carried within us moments of courage and laughter and pain this day embraces them all this place embraces us all now the heart opens in sorrow for we are times subjects and all that we love we must lose so let us hold fast to the love that remains and cherish the light of the sun today all of us walk the mourner's path together may we find strength [Music] me [Music] she [Music] keep me [Music] we are [Music] [Applause] [Music] keep me [Music] me keep me [Music] this ysker service offers us an opportunity to reflect and to remember it's a time for us to gain comfort from the nearness and reassurance of our community and it is a time for us to dedicate our thoughts and our most heartfelt prayers to those whom we have loved and lost the service is constructed around seven lit candles an acknowledgement of the teaching from the book of proverbs the human soul is god's candle we begin with the first section of our service the first candle represents the loss of a loved one page 550. we die despite appointments and feuds while our toddler who has recently learned to say no opens and shuts drawers a hundred times a day and our teen braces for the rapids of romance we die despite the contracts and business trips we planned when our desk is untidy despite a long list of things to do which we keep simmering like a rich broth we die despite work we cherish marrying whom we love piling up a star-spangled fortune basking on the riviera of fame and achieving that human participle with no known object page 553 move to the front of the line a voice says and suddenly there is nobody left standing between you and the world to take the first blows on their shoulders this is the place in books where part one ends and part two begins and there is no part three the slate is wiped not clean but like a canvas painted over in white so that a whole new landscape must be started bits of the old still showing underneath those colors sadness lens those colors sadness lends to a certain hour of evening now the line of light at the horizon is the hinge between earth and heaven only visible a few moments as the sun drops its rested padlock into place in the middle of page 554 blessed are those who give meaning to our lives holy and precious is the example they leave behind we pray together may our sorrows diminish as we recall their strength may their wisdom protect us and help us to live blessed are you holy one who gives and renews life psalm 121 can be found on page 556 [Music] is [Music] my day yes [Music] i don't know [Music] oh [Music] may i turn they are true [Music] the courage that my mother had went with her and is with her still rock from new england quarried now granite on a granite hill the golden brooch my mother wore she left behind for me to wear i have no thing i treasure more yet it is something i could spare oh if instead she'd left me the things she took to the grave that courage like a rock which she has no more need of and i have page 559 in my darkness be a light to me in my loneliness help me to find a soul akin to my own give me strength to live with courage and give me courage to draw blessing from life even in the midst of suffering to hold fast against the storm and to smile at a loved one's glance page 560 at the bottom of the page blessed is the life force within us even in the worst of times like dew on the grass it renews and restores we pray together may courage come let the dark fears be gone with morning's light let grief give way to confidence blessed are you holy one who gives and renews life the third candle represents the holiness of memory malach is on page 582 562 562 [Music] foreign [Music] blessings [Music] page 563 the light snow started late last night and continued all night long while i slept and could hear it occasionally enter my sleep where i dreamed my brother was alive again and possessing the beauty of youth aware that he would be leaving again shortly and that is a lesson of the snow falling and of the seeds of death that are in everything that is born we are here for a moment of a story that is longer than all of us and few of us remember the wind is blowing out of some place we don't know and each moment contains rhythms within rhythms and if you discover some old piece of your own writing or an old photograph you may not remember that it was you and even if it was once you it is not you now not this moment that the synapses fire and your hands move to cover your face in a gesture of grief and remembrance page 566 at the bottom blessed are the memories holy and cherish the love they reveal we pray together may our sorrows soften and blessed are you holy one who gives and renews life the fourth candle honors our most precious relationships yesh ko havim can be found on page 567 [Music] me [Music] foreign [Music] r [Music] we take a few moments for silent prayer and meditation using the words of the book through page 577 and the memories in our hearts there are stars up above so far away we only see their light long after the star itself is gone and so it is with people that we loved their memories keep shining ever brightly though their time with a system but the stars [Music] these are the lights that guide us as we live our the days we remember we remember as we live our [Music] the days we remember page 578 in the middle of the page blessed is the life of every soul pure and bright the breath of god within us we pray together help us know the infinite wisdom that gives life and takes it away forgive us for anger bitterness and selfishness teach us the language [Music] the fifth candle stands for acceptance biado is found on page 583 [Music] is you [Music] [Applause] my sleepy [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] my [Music] thank you [Music] had i known that you were going i could have given you at least good speed but you slipped away so suddenly that i was left standing on the shore watching into space not knowing that you would never come back till i felt the waters of the incoming tide cold about my heart i do not ask for you again i know the cu sail does not touch these shores i only look for a distant all hail like the white crest of a wave against the horizon or a signal light flashing once far against the sky sail on my bright sturdy mariner let out a full sheet to your new winds taste the clear spray of your new waters you were made for flight and swiftness and eternal freedom nothing shall weigh you down we'll call you back to the warm earth or the shape we knew or the place that held you so very dear i have cut the anchor chain that bound you to me and the great strength of my love and the heavy ache of my loneliness which might bear upon you and hold you back i have fashioned into a shining silken fabric to the highest and strongest of your new sales page 584 god of pity and love return to this earth go not so far away leaving us to grief return eternal one return come back with the day come with the light that we may see once more across this earth's unsettled floor the kindly path the old and living way let us not give way to evil in the night let there be god again let there be light blessed is the path to acceptance very near and sometimes distant as the horizon we pray together that our moments of joy surpass the times of struggle that we taste the sweetness of each precious day the work of our hands brings fulfillment [Music] blessed are you holy one who gives and renews life the sixth candle inspires gratitude page 585 [Music] will [Music] [Applause] [Music] those who saw enjoy [Music] is [Music] is [Music] will [Music] in tears [Music] if some messenger were to come to us with the offer the death should be overthrown but with the one inseparable condition that birth should also cease if the existing generation were given the chance to live forever but on the clear understanding that never again would there be a child or a youth or first love never again new persons with new hopes new ideas new achievements ourselves for always and never any others could the answer be in doubt when we fear death's decree let these bring us solace the memory of loved ones who have gone before us a vision of generations to come through whom we reach far into the future beyond our own lives page 590. father today you would have been 97 if you had lived and we would all be miserable you and your children driving from clinic to clinic an ancient fearful hypochondriac and his fretful son and daughter asking directions trying to read the complicated fading map of cures but with your dignity intact you have been gone for 20 years and i am glad for all of us although i miss you every day the heartbeat under your necktie the hand cupped on my on the back of my neck old spice in the air your voice delighted with stories on this day each year you loved to relate that at the moment of your birth your mother glanced out the window and saw lilacs in bloom well today lilacs are blooming inside yards all over iowa still welcoming you in the middle of page 591 blessed is the pilgrimage from grief to gratitude precious are the sights along the way we pray together for humility to see all things the great artist for generosity to respond to the gift of life by giving of ourselves for strength to hold on to life and let it go blessed are you holy one who gives and renews life the seventh candle represents the journey toward finding peace page 593 [Music] foreign [Music] okay [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] oh [Music] r [Music] [Applause] [Music] hey [Music] i don't know [Music] i don't cry [Music] we pray together at the top of page 594 psalm of david the lord is my shepherd i shall not want he maketh me to lie down in green pastures he leadeth me beside the still waters he restoreth my soul he guideth me in straight paths for his name's sake yeah though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death i will fear no evil for thou art with me thy rod and my staff they comfort me and prepare before me in the presence of mine enemies thou hast anointed my head with oil my cup runneth over surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and i shall dwell in the house of the lord on the forever of page 596 blessed is peace for all blessings flow from it precious is peace for without it no blessing is complete we pray together for inner serenity for peace of mind for the feeling of at-homeness in the universe and in our hearts blessed are you holy one who gives and renews life i'm sure a great many of you have watched the netflix netflix series diesel for those who haven't the series is about an orthodox family in israel the main characters are a rabbi who is the head of a yeshiva his brother and his son who is a gifted artist the last episode of the series is titled where does everyone suddenly go the three characters i mentioned are living together in the father's apartment and they get into a major argument at the end of the episode the son and the brother decide they've had enough and inform him that they are moving out since his wife has died the rabbi will now be left alone for the first time in his adult life no one living with him as the son and brother are about to leave to walk out the door the rabbi turns to them and says don't leave like this come sit with me a glass of soda sitting at the table the rabbi recalls a line from a book by an author he identifies as bashevis whom i assume is isaac bashevis singer he remembers reading a line from a book of his which says the dead don't go anywhere every man is a cemetery an actual cemetery in whom lie all our grandfathers and grandmothers the father the mother the wife and child everyone is here all the time as the episode and the series end the camera moves back slowly and the table lengthens and previous generations begin to appear around what was likely a shabbat or yant of table turning into vision what the rabbi had said the three men father brother and son are sitting together now joined by the generations who preceded them it was a beautiful ending to the series and a poignant way to express the idea of the sentence it struck me as i thought about the line every person is a cemetery that in what i call the scientific sense that statement is true the genes of all those folks who came before us are buried in us today we can't even trace them with dna testing the genes of past generations are buried with us within us literally discernible and even traceable and yet somehow buried doesn't seem like quite the right image because those folks those genes are not buried within us they're alive within us they are in fact what define us what shape us what make us who and what we are and in no smaller way are who they were and what they were and how they lived also alive within us it's not just their genes that make us who we are isn't it also their values and their character that are so very much alive within us shaping us defining us their love is palpable though they are gone their memories visit within us though they are no longer here but isn't that what yisker celebrates our tradition encourages us to remember the people who helped shape us most of the time we are so busy living our lives as we should that we don't think actively about them but on major holidays so rich with family togetherness judaism sets aside time for us actively not just to remember them but to celebrate them in one sense yes they are buried within us as the line from schtiesel implies but because they are really alive within us judaism sets a tie aside time and occasion to be grateful for their lives yisker creates the opportunity to remember not just that they meant something to us but that they continue to mean something to us as a rabbi i see how true this is not just at ysker i see it for sure at weddings and funerals namings unveilings it's symbolized by the grandfather's talit cradling a newborn child coming in for their breed mila or naming or wrapped around a bride and groom at their wedding for the priestly benediction i hear it in the tributes given by family members at the death of a loved one just last week i experienced it personally as i watched my three children interact lovingly with each other while we were here for linda's unveiling i've seen it at the shabbat table that i've shared with families as they lift up the kiddush cup their grandmother brought from russia or pesach that the family as the family seder plate from three or four generations back holds those three motzes and i've experienced that mitzvah when the talit that child is wearing is three or four generations old you see these are not just objects and they're not just words spoken they are all symbols of how alive our loved ones are within us even though they are gone even though they may even have belonged to people that we never met because they died before we were born truthfully truthfully they are alive within us every day in the phrases we repeat to our children that our parents said to us in the gestures that imitate them even though we may not be aware we are making them in the way we our head or give a knowing smile or move when we walk all of this all of this and more than we can account for are signs that the people we remember are alive within us all the generations who come before us come alive in us every day as we live our lives so today while we shed tears in remembrance of them hopefully we are also celebrating them being thankful for them being grateful we still possess memories of them and our love for them remains alive within us though they are no longer here each of us is a repository of the generations before our genes our behavior our strengths even our weaknesses our values we are the sum total of all who came before us and what greater honor could we do them than to be thankful for what they bequeath to us and live our lives as a reflection of what they willed us to feel their love to cherish their memories those are their true inheritance to us these are blessings blessings that remain behind within us and so may this yusker be atten a time when we not only remember but give thanks for all that is alive and within us that comes from them let every tear be laced with a smile of gratitude and appreciation and may god bless our remembering with gratefulness and appreciation amen we continue with silence page 599 and 601. [Music] so please rise for the almalei rakhami on page 598. [Music] is [Music] i [Music] is [Music] they [Music] merciful god god most high let there be perfect rest for the souls of our loved ones who have gone into eternity may they find shelter in your presence among the holy and pure whose light shines like the radiance of heaven compassionate god hold them close to you forever may their souls be bubbled up in the bond of life eternal may they find a home in you and may they rest in peace as together we say amen amen please be seated we pray together in the middle of page 602 we miss them at celebrations when there's an empty seat at the table we miss them when the community gathers and there's an empty place beside us we miss them today and every today with every year that passes as their life goes on without them their faces their voices the feel of our arms around them these are with us forever for it is written love is as strong as death the love that we gave and the love we received please endure the pain of loss we lovingly remember the following members of our congregation who died in the past year sybil belasco june bench henry burkett ann bruno raymond bruno joyce cohen ruth datz arthur dahm daniel drawer bernice feld jerry fachelle vicki greenberg jerry hooks mark kalish gloria pepper katz dawn kaufman ira kaufman cecile keeper william klein allen leon beattie lewis michael loeb bree pugh edward pilner lillian schaefer aaron schneider priscilla schube gail shapiro evelyn snyder marvin speer william spitz shelley stallero benjamin zukuletsky william tarniple leonard tarter fred tizer milton wagner hi warsha harriet zinn we remember as well these beloved relatives of our members who were laid to rest over the past year we remember jay abramson betty baggett richard bamberger jaime barrer andrew winkelmann barr donald neal bass sandy baum mary nell bleaker robert bronig nevin brown shelley cohen irving corbin seema davis michael donfield barbara dunn essie eisner donald epstein judith ehrlich bruce farkas leah fradken lewis fram selma ann galt michelle roth globin neil goldenberg curtis graves marilyn halpen betty hyman edward joseph jody hoffer harlan arthur hurwitz estelle jucker marlene kaplan stephen keeler natalie curtin lizzie lancare paul lazavich mark levy lauren libben renee maltz beverly manny jeffrey mark tripp mellier evelyn muntz joseph pellenberg nettie pogash jules pochette allen rouch arthur ribbon larry ricklin joshua nathan roberts carrie robinson william n roddy hillary rose francis roseman jennifer rolnick rosenthal kimberly sagion peter schmiel doris marie aaron schwartzberg david seligman paul sarens melvin sigmon face lusky catherine smallinski eugene solomon jarrell speer solomon stopnicky stan tenenbaum trina underwood sandra viedel judith vines janice ware ronald wolff and harry yaffi the memories of all of them are with us as we rise together and turn to page 606 for the mourner scottish page 606. is [Music] amen [Music] oh r is [Music] oh [Music] i we thank you for bringing your memories and your morning to this space our concluding service of ni'ila will begin in just a few moments but as we're preparing for that service if you're seated in the back of the room and are comfortable moving forward we invite you to do so so you can be a bit closer to the magnificent closing service of this yom kippur [Music] hmm so [Music] so [Music] roll into dark roll into light night becomes [Music] tonight [Music] is [Music] tonight [Music] we've arrived now at ila the closing service of this day of atonement the time at which we prepare for the gates to be closed and locked for one more year this service of conclusion is built around the ceremony of havdalah the service of separation the marker that we place between two different sorts of time holy time and ordinary time during the service the components of this hovdala ceremony wine and spices light and separation will be interspersed with other prayers in this service and so as we make our way through nila we will also make our way through havdalah separating closing and preparing to say goodbye to yom kippur for another year on page 613 we begin again the day rolls into darkness the sky spills its pinks and purples draining to blackness deep inside there is a closing a small gate swinging shut in the mind those few last thoughts rush through and a life is sealed outside the temple a lone bird sounds its call waits for response [Music] we read in the psalms that wine gladdens the heart indeed wine is the jewish symbol for joy and every bris and baby naming under the chuppah at the shabbat and festival table we raise the cup of sweetness as we celebrate joyful moments we link our habdallah prayer about wine to the next prayer in the nila service which ends with the promise of dietza madzohola joy and gladness as we move into a new year absolved of sin we create more space for joy in our lives [Music] i [Music] foreign [Music] 1 2 in the last verse on page 614. [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Applause] [Music] um [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Music] page 621 just a moment a shaft of sunlight in the fog a shift of mind and heart a breath of peace just a moment that's all i ask to feel you there to know your touch to see the truth beyond these words we speak at the end of this long day one last chance to stand before you exhausted as i am i still have hope just a moment let me pray [Music] [Music] additional dimension of soulfulness that we possess on shabbat departs with the setting sun as we prepare to conclude this day of elevation of soul searching and soul reckoning we find consolation in the memory of our past joys and achievements and look forward to the new year of possibility lies [Music] foreign [Music] page 627 we pray responsively when greeting a friend after more than a year say praise the power that gives life to the dead when the prisoner is freed and the sick one is healed say praise the power that gives life to the dead when asking forgiveness and the other forgives say praise the power that gives life to the dead when words of torah unlock the heart and open the eyes say praise the power that gives life to the dead when evil is stopped and goodness prevails say praise the power that gives life to the dead when hope fills the spirit of one who despaired say praise the power that gives life to the dead when the hearts of the parents turn to the children and the hearts of the children turn to the parents say praise the power that gives life to the dead we praise you eternal power source of our immortal yearnings our undying hopes page 628. [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] page 659 we loved and we wept we were kind and spoke thoughtfully we were faithful and trusting we put forth effort we were mindful we embraced we took delight in the holy books we were creative and we yearned we fought for justice and searched out the good we tried our best and we were attentive we did what you commanded us to do we found meaning in torah and most of the time we did what is right we proclaimed your name we were accepting we were joyful and we cared kiana is back on page 650 let's sing together [Music] [Applause] [Music] they [Music] m [Music] we've arrived now at our final confession the last opportunity for us to confess our deeds and our sins over the past year one last chance before the gates swing shut we've said these words so many times over the past day maybe they're still difficult looking towards the closure of this day wondering if our confessions have had any effect on ourselves and on god we've done this work together for so long we've taken this long journey bringing us to this point the end of this road the time waiting to see if our repentance will be accepted we find ourselves here before the closing of the gates finding god waiting for us reaching out a hand preparing to hear our confession on page 653 please rise [Music] oh [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] here [Music] new foreign [Music] foreign [Music] news [Music] page 660 responsibly please go forth in gladness your heart filled with joy eat your bread and drink your wine god of glory high above hear the cry of those who trust you let your people know even the unkindest of your deeds i will forgive go forth in gladness your heart filled with joy eat your bread and drink your wine now as the gates are closing now as the sun begins to fade with waters of atonement bathe your people the ones you embrace in love go forth in gladness your heart filled with joy eat your bread and drink your wine as we prepare to offer our final avenue mulcainu of these high holy days we appeal to god to offer us the loving compassion of a parent and the majesty of a sovereign to hear our prayers and help us to return as the gates begin to close we continue on page 664. [Music] oh [Music] i say my face [Music] [Applause] is [Music] we continue responsively on page 671 as the sabbath of sabbaths ends we say from the heart living source you are ours we are yours from beyond time and space you hold out your hand to receive us the living source you are ours we are yours you are the sovereign of remembrance the voice of holiness your presence lights the way living source you are ours we are yours here the shofar witness to history thunder to our souls living source you are ours we are yours happy are those who love the sound of the shofar it's mystic chords of memory living source you are ours we are yours hear the shofar here is cry of freedom it's call of course cherish its promise of hope [Music] oh [Music] foreign [Music] oh [Music] i am [Music] hmm [Music] tequila [Music] hmm [Music] [Music] is the demarcation between the holy and the mundane tonight as we extinguish this candle let it mark an additional separation between what was and what still could be between the people we have been in the past and the people we have pledged to become in this new year page 600 675 [Music] is [Music] me [Music] um [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] is [Music] me [Music] this holy day is now ended and with it these days of repentance and a year unlike any other in memory we have made it to this place together we have brought our tears and our triumphs our memories and our mourning to make our way not alone but together step by step and hand in hand with the members of this sacred community and so may we go forth from this place to a year of health and happiness a year of goodness compassion and peace amen [Music] [Applause] [Music] is [Music] [Music] you

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Keywords: Yom Kippur, Yizkor, N'ilah, Havdalah Experience, Yizkor 2021, High Holy Days, High Holy Days 2021, Yizkor '21, Congregation Emanu El, Emanu El Houston, Houston Jewish, Reform Judaism, HHDs, HHDs 2021, Rabbi Roy Walter, Rabbi, Houston Synagogue, Yom Kippur Houston

Id: 5Pw9eKZcIT8

Length: 107min 53sec (6473 seconds)

Published: Thu Sep 16 2021