Worst Tinder Dates in History (Part 2)

what is your tinder horror story my roommate loves tinder and she's brought back numerous visitors which is fine except for the fact that the apartment is tiny and we share a room and also the fact that my roommate doesn't really care what i end up seeing and as it turns out most guys don't care about having another girl in the room either some take it as an opportunity to ask me to join my roommate is my tinder nightmare finally started seeing a girl off tinder it was going well for about two weeks and thought she was pretty cool then things started getting weird she used to always joke about killing me i thought it was okay the first few times but then it got annoying i told her to stop and she kept doing it idk if it was because she thought it was funny that it freaked me out or what anyways told me she has a shotgun in her room yikes long story short i told her i didn't want to see her anymore she didn't like that for the next three weeks she's absolutely hounding me calls me constantly shows up at my work asking for me keeps coming over to my apartment she actually knocked on my door for 30 minutes when i didn't answer she went around back and started knocking on my bedroom window got really concerned for a while but eventually she gave up i went on a date with a guy and the entire time he was talking about how men are superior and how they have been scientific studies to show that women have an emotional reaction to the color red when they see it i wonder why he was single i'm probably too late but here it goes sorry for the wall of text my first and only tinder date i started talking to a cute guy we hit it off really well we'll call him greg greg lived in a town nearly an hour away so we texted for about two weeks before we decided to meet due to schedules during this time greg consistently attempted to wow with his food knowledge i work in the fine dining restaurant industry often telling me about what meal he was cooking for him and his roommates each night after several days of talking he then asks me to come to his house so he would be able to cook for me i oblige figuring what's the worst that could happen i've talked to him several times and felt okay about the whole situation the day comes and we meet somewhere neutral and i follow him to his house all the while i'm explaining how excited he is to cook for me we arrive at his place everything is going really great he's exactly as i pictured him and his personality fits me perfect dinner time rolls around and he tells me he needs to go downstairs to begin prep i become eager and say i'd love to help he insists i stay on the couch and relax we continue to talk across rooms and i can't see what's going on in the kitchen he put something in the oven and says it will be ready in just a bit and that he made extra in case i was hungry 15 minutes late greg leaps off the couch to a timer and runs to the kitchen he brings sauces first saying that they are the best part he lays ketchup ranch and barbecue sauce on the table i begin to get confused wondering what he made as he refused to tell me announcing that he wanted to keep it a secret greg returns to the kitchen to retrieve the plates he walks in and carries a turkey platter to the table i gaze into what had to be no less than three bags of frozen fries he had displayed on a turkey platter for our dinner he looks at me eagerly awaiting my reaction for me to lose it i begin uncontrollably laughing and his smile drops as i say this is great thank you assuming this was a gag meal and he had prepared dinner to follow no greg invited me to dinner to cook me his specialty frozen french fries they were delicious fries and the sauce was the best part met up with a really hot big curious girl i'm a lesbian this girl had only ever been with men and wanted to experiment with girls she was stupidly hot like hot hot we matched and we chatted for like two days i soon found out we had no common ground at all like none however she wanted to meet and me being the frisky les gremlin i am agreed just because she was hot and i could take a girl on girl virginity we agreed to meet one day picked her up and we went for drinks walked back to mine and chatted a little more over alcoholic root beer and breaking bad we started making out she took off my bra i took off hers she took my pants off i took hers off but we started kissing touching feeling she starts fingering me i can tell straight away she is a first-timer she starts jabbing at my poor bag with her half-inch acrylics i tell her to slow down a little and be a little more gentle about it all of a sudden she bursts into tears and says she's not ready i tell her it's fine blah blah she ends up staying at my place and we cuddle for the night until i sobered up enough to drive her back home in the morning later the next day i go for a pee and realize it stings like a bee and my pee smells dreadful and is cloudy run to the doctors because i'm a casual hypochondriac and take a pee sample doctor sticks the paper in my pee and yup straight away it shows i have a ut i didn't pee after little miss bakeria scratched my insides out b gave me a ut and blue balls comma blue balls blue walls i dated someone i met from tinder for a month seemed good on paper master student yoga teacher cultured etc found out she was doing h and didn't consider that a big problem i actually had to explain to her the definition of a high-functioning addict because she felt that having a job and going to school meant the age thing wasn't a problem we broke up and she went back to her junkie xbf bullet dodged edit lol all the people peeming me trying to confirm if i was simultaneously dating their own crappy gf if you find yourself wondering if i'm describing your gf you should just break up with her immediately my tinder horror story is very funny looking back the girl comes over she couldn't get there until 7 30ish i had some pizza warming in the oven just in case she was hungry for some stupid reason i put the pizza in the box to warm in the oven it was a real pizza from a pizza place she wasn't hungry so we jump right into making out clothes gets thrown we head back towards the bedroom i go into the kitchen and turn the oven off but leave the pizza in there a few minutes later i am going down on her and i hear a beeping i lift up my head and say what was that she says i think it was a truck backing up i hop up just to check in the oven without my glasses on i had accidentally missed off by an eighth of an inch and my crappy oven went to broil the beeping was telling me it was preheated i stupidly opened the oven and smoke comes billowing out then the box bursts into flames i am standing there but but naked and i start yelling frick frick oh crap then she comes running in totally naked as i pull the box out thinking i am going to pour water on it it was stressful i don't know what i was thinking i set it on the stove and then she hits it with a dish towel sparks and burnt crap go all over my kitchen but the box is still on fire my sink is so full of crap that i can't get the box in there she yells bathtub so i pick up a goddamn burning box and run to my bathroom over the carpet my shower mat and pass the shower curtain all very flammable the entire top of the pizza box was either in flames or charred and flaking off as i ran remember we are both totally naked this whole time so imagine a naked screaming man running through his crappy apartment with a burning pizza box in his hands that was me this was a date i throw the box in the bathtub and turned a shower on she was so super cool about it she helped me clean everything up and then we got dressed and just stood outside for a while she could tell i was really freaked out and kept reassuring me all was well then we went back in and i went down on her again then we had sex we still hang out often and have a lot of fun together i still have burn marks in my bathtub and on my bathroom door como i stupidly opened the oven and smoke comes billowing out then the box bursts into flames to extinguish an oven fire just close the oven door and turn off the oven the inside of the oven can easily handle any flames and the oven door staying closed deprives the fire of the oxygen that needs to keep burning i had been on a couple of dates with this girl that i met on tinder and learned that she was really into the rockabilly scene i found out that a local nightclub was hosting a rockabilly themed night and so i took her she had dressed to the nines and we were having a great time in the club suddenly this guy accidentally tipped a drink on her 50s style dress the guy apologized profusely she storms over to grab her coat and bag and on the way out she just punches the guy in the face everyone in the club was shocked i took her outside and told her she couldn't react like that and that's when she took her heel off and hit me square in the face for siding with the guy blood everywhere i never answered her calls after that oh and she used to be a stripper and kanjiro this adds nothing to the story but i just like telling people pew pew i met this guy on tinder and we had a couple really fun dates i was pretty into him so on our third date i decided i wanted to have sex with him he took me out for a really nice date and then he invited me back to his place for a glass of wine one thing led to another and we started making out on his couch fully clothed but this lasted forever i was ready to go if you know what i mean i didn't want to make out the whole night so i decided to take matters into my own hands and i took off all of my clothes then he sits up still fully clothed and looks at me and says i can't have sex with you i have a std possibly most awkward moment of my life i tried to be super nice about it but i promptly got dressed and left and as many of my friends have pointed out i am extremely grateful that he told me that's really big of him nothing but props to that dude and route to the worst date ever this guy texted me from the burrito place we were meeting to tell me he'd already ordered me the salad i repeat salad at a burrito place also was this the past was i now incapable of placing my own food order anyway after arriving with my salad ready beside his plate of tacos he spent the next half an hour telling me about his model ex-girlfriend and how passionate their breakup sex had been last weekend the final straw was even after telling him i wasn't a big fan of smoking he literally asked a stranger for cigarettes and then chain smoked them beside me way way way late to the party apparently but i feel obliged to share my best friend's story he you philosophy i think was his username died recently at age 23 from a massive seizure in his sleep but he loved to tell this story so i'll tell it here so at least if i ever forget it i know at least i can find it so this philosopher is a shy guy timid a bit neurotic dates are hard to come by for him but when he's on them he's nice and charming and fairly handsome i'll give him that so he doesn't do too bad once he's got a shot anyway all the slabs are on tinder at this stage and we all have the philosophy always swipe whichever way is yes so you get maximum matches and take it from there now there is this one girl who looks a bit rough a bit unkept i'll say in her description read i love giving bj's now philosophy was a very compassionate guy and talked to literally everyone he matched with and gave everyone at least one date he didn't match with many but bless him he dated them all including his gf up until his death may she never read this full stop he travels on a train to date this girl at her house he recounted that from being picked up at the train station the car was full of litter the football was 90 percent litter 10 his feet and the woman from the photo she had aged not too kindly either and the house was run down dirty every room doubling as a bedroom for some cava dweller from that part of town my memory gets a little hazy here but she asks him if he'd like tea he says he would and he has some chamomile in his words the one clean thing i had in this house was a teacup and a chamomile tea after a while of small talk and awkward experience she asked him if he wanted a [ __ ] assuring him she was really good at these he finds a spot on the bed among the rubbish cup of chamomile in hand his only refuge of cleanliness as the constant background dripping is drowned out by excessive slurping off his half mast he cuddles his warm tea thinking only of home man the way he described it was a very funny and less like he's repulsed oh crap my time to shine now i swear all is true this girl i've been sweet talking for a few weeks and i finally set up a date to meet up and go out to this nice restaurant and have dinner the night comes and she asks me to pick her up because her car is in the shop i head over to the address and it's this confusing apartment complex but quickly find her outside her building but she asked me to meet her family so i go and meet her mother who is the sweetest woman ever and her father who was quiet but kind after we leave she immediately turns to me and says can we pick up my cousin i'm shocked but say sure i didn't really question it we head to a really sketchy neighborhood in san jose and pick up this super skinny tatted up white guy and he asked who the frick i am and i was about to say her date but she cuts me off and says oh just a friend don't worry about him and he says all right babe he then guides me two cities over to this crappy house where this really nicely dressed asian guy meets us outside and takes us into the garage where a cracked out skinny mexican guy and pregnant white chicken sits us down in between then and ask tower poison my date said weed along with the mexican guy and the cousin the pregnant chick says i'm fine weed is bad for the baby and then pulls out a crack pipe and starts smoking something the asian guy said pay up and everyone looks towards me and i said all right and pulled 60 out of my wallet and asked if that's enough and the asian guy said it's fine he leaves the garage taking my get the guest soda and comes back 10 awkward minutes later and stoned with nothing saying sorry guys i'm out of weed but my dealer is on his way 20 minutes later he shows up screaming and throwing weed at the mexican guy and just leaving then the asian guy asked if anyone had a pipe and i said i did and they all got happy and i went outside to my car and drive off because i'm pretty sure i would have died that night i had been talking to this girl on tinder for a while and we decided we wanted to smash the problem is i had asked my roommate if i could of the room later apparently unlike the rest of the animals you people seem to have as roommates so when i went to sign this girl in we have a proctor in the lobby at my university's dorms my roommate and several other friends of mine placed a bluetooth speaker in my room and hid in the hallway waiting for me to get back i didn't see them and things started to get hot and heavy when let's get it on started playing from somewhere in the room i started searching and after five minutes while the song i just had sex was finishing playing i found the bluetooth speaker under my roommate's bed behind his dresser yes i had to move both of them i found the power button but not before the wonderful sound of hardcore pornography filled the room but the two of us decided to call it so we threw on some clothes i walked her past all six of the bastards i never saw her again come up unlike the rest of the animals you people seem to have as roommates coma my roommate and several other friends of mine placed a bluetooth speaker in my room and hid in the hallway met this girl on tinder invited her into bed she accepts comes over we have fantastic sex a lot same thing the next night thing is she's moving to montana in a few weeks for a job a cook position in a national park she invites me out there i look into the job and eventually gets it we decide to start dating met twice known her for a month i'm an idiot to keep it exclusive at adult summer camp there in montana i get out there she freaks out and breaks up with me because she has cancer cancels the breakup does it again the next night i agree and say it's over proceeds to dong block me constantly throughout the summer and we scream at each other in the kitchen poor choices all around as a man in a long-term pre-tinder relationship i'm really living vicariously through these stories and they are outstanding bless you people this didn't actually come about through tinder but rather through an equivalent app so i meet the guy there and he's just incredible clever good looking funny you get the type the only catch is that he doesn't live in my city after a couple of weeks of messaging and phone calls we decide to meet up and we settle on that i would be going to him because i'd never been to his city and that seemed like a fun little adventure right wrong the big day comes and i embark on the 2.5 hour train journey and i get all excited and i can't wait to get off the train and then he's not at the platform when i get off try to call him to no avail and after four hours of waiting i decide to take the next train back home i haven't heard from him since tl dr met a guy from a different city relatively far away stands me up when i go out there to meet him i don't really have a horror story since i've gotten about one date out of tinder which went all right but i've been rejected plenty the highlight of which was this girl who seemed pretty interesting and was reasonably attractive so i swiped right and it turned out that we matched hurray so i sent her a message something clever along the lines of hey a match did we just become best friends though i can't take credit for that one i did steal that from ridic step brothers happily she responded rather promptly so i was eager to read what she'd sent cause for the most part women just kinda ignore me anyway i open it up and all it said was i swiped the wrong way that woman is a savage matched with a girl and she was quite pretty in the face all of her pictures were mostly of just her face upper body but i didn't pay any mind she initiated the conversation and she was immediately into hooking up so of course i invited her over she gets there and i answer the door and turns out she was about six feet five inches i am five feet eight inches on a good day i let out an audible holy crap and she picked me up and carried me to the bedroom like a baby no regrets advice welcome so i went on three dates with this dude and we hooked up the last time at his house things end with the typical fade away i was fine with it we weren't very compatible and i noticed a few minor red flags six months later he starts emailing me obviously looking for a reenactment of our summer fling when i turn down his advances he sends me a screenshot of myself in his bedroom while we were hooking up half a year ago so obviously this douche nozzle filmed us without my consent i reported it to the police and now almost a year after i filed the report i have to testify against the creep i have no legal rep except the state's victim advocate who only seems to have experience with dv cases has anyone else been through something like this i can't find a way to report him via tinder i deleted my account a long time ago my biggest concern is that he's still out there being a creep to other ladies on tinder downloaded tinder for quick and simple hookups first couple matches were pretty decent drinks sex etc the third girl however wanted to take things a little slower first date a little making out second date same thing but still won't go home with me third date we had some really awkward sex with the lights on and no music i was so nervous i had a hard time keeping it up and she was barely wet we've been dating for 10 months and she is going to meet my parents this weekend the horror happened a year ago met this guy similar interests looked great in his pictures we decided to meet up on a sunday for lunch i was so hungover from a friend's christmas party that i threw up upon arrival he didn't seem to mind he didn't order a drink and i couldn't order one due to the hangover once the hangover subsided i suggested we walk around and head into a bar he doesn't like the first bar had a bad experience at the next bar and keeps on passing on them until we finally get to his favorite bar he orders drinks and after a few more drinks i suggest heading to a wine bar he passes because he confesses that he's only 20 and while his profile said he worked at a local college it was a work study position because he is a junior there maybe it was the hangover maybe it was the exhaustion but i still brought him home things occurred and i found out he was a virgin he ran away in tears and threw up on my apartment stairs repeated the process once he was 21 and it was almost the same situation never again we talked for a couple of hours drank some wine watched a movie and we had sex then things went a little downhill we laid in bed and suddenly it looked like she was about to black out so i helped her sit right up and asked if i could help her get her some water and stuff but she didn't speak a word she just sat there with her hands in her hair for a couple of minutes and then puked all over my sheets at this point i wanted to get her to the shower asap but she was just stunned or something i didn't know what to do after a couple minutes i finally convinced her to get up and brought her to the shower so she could clean herself while i could clean the sheets and all that every five minutes i checked on her if she was okay but she would just sit on the floor with the shower running and wouldn't talk it was all very awkward after 20 minutes or so i brought her a towel and some clothes and we sat on the edge of my bed and she told me that she was born without a womb she cried i calmed her down and we finally went to sleep without a blanket or sheets i didn't have spare ones in my student apartment the next day i made breakfast and she went home weirdest date i ever had i matched this pretty cute looking girl she didn't look like she was in super great shape but she didn't look obese or anything well we exchanged numbers and i called her she agreed to come over to my house so i waited outside while she found her way over she pulls up in a super badass car so i'm like hey when she gets out it looked like her suspension let out a sigh of relief she was at least 300 pounds nice girl though she gave me a back massage then i told her i was tired afterwards and she left i'm a little late to the party but my first tinder date has been my most eventful date ever so i matched this absolutely drop dead gorgeous girl way out of my league and we arranged to meet in the city for a few drinks on a friday evening we meet in this little bar and share a drink the conversation is a lot of small talk to begin with but it's flowing well anyway we're there for about 30 minutes when she says she hasn't eaten anything yet and asks if i wanna grab a bite to eat i do so we finish our drinks and start moving outside to find some food as we're walking along the sidewalk i see this guy in front of me staring me down like he has proper shooting daggers at me and making me super uncomfortable i try to ignore him look at the ground look at the girl whatever we move to pass him and he spins around on his heel and slams me into a wall he has his forearm pressed up against my neck and is pushing so hard my feet are starting to lift off the ground i try and pull his arm away from my throat unsuccessfully and my vision is starting to go black i thought i was done for here in a last-ditch effort to not be strangled to death i used the wall as a board to push my knee up into him as hard as i can i hit him square in the groin and he relinquishes his grip my vision starts to return although it's giving me a splitting headache i splutter and try and get my breath back a bit while i watch this guy curl over red in the face with veins popping out of his forehead he stumbles over to the street and throws up all through the gutter i turn to the girl who's just watching all of this like a ruin headlights turns out the guy was her ex-boyfriend who heard about our date through a mutual friend of theirs i managed to wheeze out enough to ask her if she'd like to get another drink with me as i could really use one she declines and says she's just going to get a ride home and practically sprint away from whatever the heck this situation was i ended up leaving this other guy puking in the street and stayed out for a few hours by myself had a really good night in the end met a bunch of new people and a pretty fun story in hindsight went out with a girl and had a great time together i only knew her first name we were texting later that night after our date and i told her to add me on snapchat and gave her my username she added me and i popped a request from first name last name her last name being my mom's very rare maiden name she was my second cousin we clarified things briefly and never spoke again if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video bye for now

Channel: UE Studios

Views: 45,697

Rating: 4.8791113 out of 5

Keywords: worst tinder date, worst tinder date story time, worst tinder date ever, tinder horror, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh, reddit stories 2020

Id: 9ZYVT_AkjR0

Length: 26min 33sec (1593 seconds)

Published: Thu Nov 12 2020