Woke Woman in Prehistoric Island [ARK ANIMATED SERIES RECAP]

what do you get when you put Vin Diesel Russell KRA leonitis and this guy as a director with a smile that could save 10,000 puppies from ass cancer you get an ark anime we have Ark anime before GTA 6 wildcard launched a show randomly at 5:00 a.m. posted a tweet and called it a day the last draw was dropped when they announced anyone outside of the US or Canada can weigh 30 more glob spins to watch let's begin episode 1 we get a nice Arc logo popping up to remind us this is Art just in case there's any viewers with instant memory loss the first animal to show up is a fish why not I don't know a Dodo the next shot reveals Helena our protagonist floating unconscious in the ocean at least the game had the decency to spawn us on land the silhouette of a shark appears in this scene Helena is 2 square in away from respawning but a second later she's Michael Phelps herself 30 ft away from the shark but the 60ft shark somehow caught up to Helena Phelps when it gets interrupted by the screen Rider and a massive whale saves the day now safe in the beach she realizes she has an implant on her arm then a doo spikes her adrenaline so high that she begins to speak English with the bird a flying spear interrupts her cuddling session and a new character introduced his name is Bob and he's a World War II veteran Helena gives him a whole lot of vegan Greta thurberg mumble jumble of reasons to not kill the dodo Bob explains he got here the same way and that the question is not where are we but when a line I have never heard before Bob hands Helena some clothes and then gives the doto a smile that would get you 35 counts of sexual assault in today's age meanwhile Helena found an atino which she puts in her pocket animal rights only apply if you have feathers sorry Gary Bobby explains one second he was in normany the next here Helena is like wait that was in 1944 then Bob's like for me that was 2 weeks ago dramatic sounds cute but the only dramatic thing here is that Bob has a spear and a stone Hatchet in 2 weeks he then ask Helena where she's from she's like I'm from the future and reveals to him that the Allies won the war this brings a smile to Bob Bob don't smile often suddenly an ominous sound strikes the doo which has no visible ears has the audacity to be scared by this but a second later he's staring at the Horizon completely forgetting the sound that had him trembling apparently meob berries come with a sight of ketamine as they walk through the jungle they find the mesopithecus group chilling in the trees a mega Noir getting clapped and suddenly oh my God so epic two bronos taking a sip three trikes bathing and a Pteranodon flinging by at mach 10 in case you missed it the Pteranodon flies by once again breaking the sound of barrier or the barrier of sound apparently the only guy who they could find to draw some PS failed geometry and is still taking sixth grade physics to animate the PT's Wing flaps we then get a flashback to Helena a to do a speech in Australia then big farmer receives a massive shout out as she swallows some ketamine down to relax she gets a text from roria that could have been made by chat TB if a 5-year-old made chat DBT she is presented as Dr Walker and Her speech is well organized lines among the crowd she spots blue-haired Victoria this calms her down then her speech begins a speech that can only be understood if you look at least 95% like this Emoji basically in the future they will be able to bring back to life extinct creatures there I saved you from wearing glasses for two more years of course the blue paired liberal brings liberal flowers then they kiss to make any 10-year-old watching question their sexuality while also taking the gay scene box and claiming a fat paycheck from the LGBT qz plus Elite back to the arc they spot a parasaur on the ground with an arrow on its I think shoulder Bob thinks an arrow is enough to put down a parasaur and suggest putting it out of its mystery I have a feeling Bob applied the same thought process when a friend the Normandy got shot in the leg and he followed up with a head shot to put him out of his pain the arrow was made with the same material as Thor's axe because as soon as they pulled it out the parasaur could stand up on its own she then calls him scary the parasaur he walks away but before dipping he turns around and thanks Helena in parasaur knees Bob questions how Helena knows all these dinosaurs and she responds with their phds and Masters but I don't get the big deal all we had to do was download Arc and play for a few hours to become a dyo connoisseur Bob is then interrupted mid speech by a stone Arrow graphically going through his throat in a scene that could simultaneously demonetize 25 YouTube channels and end 45 childhoods at once an Archer on a Raptor appears and an epic Chase unleashes she runs into a village that's being online wiped presumably by the Archer this is an accurate depiction of a bigger tribe mauling a clueless tribe for the fun of it f guy with a hatchet gets dealt with five shots of technology and as soon as we're showing his eyes I knew it was Rockwell chilling on a trike behind Helena a with an accent starts yapping Helena saves herself using the reflection of a metal shield because apparently Raptors are sensitive to light Rockwell caught a glimpse of this 200 IQ play and smirks or grins I don't know what to call this Helena then beats a guy and Flacks senseless with a rock then gets bouldered but because Rock will saw her mogg play he spares her from the stone Arrow treatment she does however take a punch from Flack Tyson that sends her into a flashback they reveal a conflict is ongoing in China and blue hair chick has to go help Helena doesn't want her to go but Smurf hair decides to go anyway who cares back to Ark Rocko immediately gives off weird Vibes while he explains that nobody knows what this place is but he calls it the ark we're then shown their Village filled with Raptors and men in flak Prim Flack I presume she isn't pleased by how the animals are treated in this Camp however so so Rockwell holds her chin she moves his hand away and gets sent back to the 1890s then Rockwell says exactly this you're going to be a good girl Helena affirms her being from the 21st century displaying a perfect headbutt zadon in the World Cup style Helena runs around like post Malone in circles and is eventually stopped by a Rex the dodo is alive because KFC wasn't invented until 1952 the Rex roars and somehow this doesn't cause a flashback but we get a new character introduced nerva from the Roman Empire just 20 minutes into the series in H is already caged then shakas gets a cameo it's all right I had just run my plate Rockwell teaches Helena a lesson or in this case gives her an explor note by sacrificing shockist in front of her shock begs the devs to save him again this time but is denied nighttime hits and it's time for a flashback the police are here to tell Helena her blue-haired Victoria was shot by Andrew Tate after a heated debate over women's parking rights Helena then gets another sponsorship from the pharmaceutical industry and I assume she also dies from an overdose the Orchid Vase breaking and the liberal door opening where she reunites with Victoria is appar apparently what the director called symbolism we hear Tate's Gizzy go off women can't drive duh killing Victoria and the colors go from Blue to Red clearly signifying Helena is going to vote for Trump 2024 this is confirmed when back at the ark a blonde woman hands her the red pill and Helena devours it scary the parasaur makes an unnecessary appearance just to say that he's alive and then randomly goes away again by the way this whole time the snail has been in her pocket snail gets about 5 Seconds of fresh air until Rockwood appears and the snail goes back into solitary the blonde girl speaks gibberish as they take Helena away to speak with the tribe leader nerva they get to know each other and understand their time zones as much as a gladiator from the Roman Empire can understand science or a woman even knowing science apparently in ancient Rome nerva had spare time to study cartography and draw a sick map of Italy in his room while the average American today couldn't tell if Africa is a continent or a country Helena reaches for her pocket and then puts something on nera's cup I wonder what has been in her pocket since she spawned in nerva shows Helena his artifact because he has no clue what to do with it he then drops a bunch of artifact Exposition on us that we don't care about basically he thinks if he gets all three he can go back to Rome with his dinosaurs take down Caesar and the corrupt Elite without realizing he is the corrupt Elite of the Ark irony as nerva places his lips on the cup he taste or smells the vile akatina dookie laid on it but Helena has a degree in dinosaurs and knows he will be paralyzed by akatina dooki in 5.4 seconds then instead of crediting the paralyzing Venom to Witchcraft which half of these 16th century neander those would believe she gives away her Secret allowing them to use it against her in the future let's not let this Slide by the way she mentions he should be paralyzed for a few hours she prized the artifact off nervous hands takes his diary and walks free until Rockwell spawns in behind her but she had laid down raw meat all over the camp which hungry Raptors go berserk for her plan doesn't work all too well on itself so scary reappears to save her apparently in three scenes and 45 seconds hours went by and nerva is unparalyzed scary sacrifices precious brain cells to free a crowd of seven slaves including a blonde woman who just speaks gibberish the dodo is also somehow not a chicken nugget yet so he comes along after taking down two Raptors nerva chases down 21st century junky drunkie Helena and after a life's dedication to the way of the Spartan he is not able to catch up to a skinny woman that's also carrying a 50 lb DOTA she hops on scary who goes quickly from a reliable Mount to a hard carry and they escape the camp because the door was left open for some reason after failing to catch up to a 21st century female nerva still has the nerve to Chu a spear over 40 m and he actually hits her this man was born in the wrong era today he would have been first pick in the MLB draft to left field for the Yankees Helena's reaction to a spear the size of a parasaur piercing her shoulder with an a that could easily pass as a stub toe Rockwell and nerva basically say are we have to get our artifact back flashback and I was wrong she is still alive barely a lot more pills and wine well back to Ark where she actually could be dying never mind another flashback and she dropped her phone assuming she died now for real and back to Ark where her real life death gives her a second wind in the ark she removes the spear and uses her cloth Gauntlet as a Band-Aid for the massive hole in her shoulder that works just fine because she has a master's degree don't forget the guy who animates pts decides to ruin the end of The Show by showing his awesome Wing flaps again the episode comes to an end with these words I'm going to survive episode two begins with Helena falling off scary who once again drifts away she is about to be recaptured when a new character is presented but before we meet them a flashback we get to see Helena's mother give a cliche speech and I quote if we can't walk we crawl okay Shakespeare Wild Card point me to whoever wrote that so we can have him or her never pick up a pencil again in their life Australia hears about BLM and drops their own protest this time AB BLM Australian black lives matter I like how One of the signs just says respect Australian white supremacist show up out of nowhere causing an interracial squabble finally back to Ark although an entire tribe is out searching for her Helena sleeps by a campfire in the middle of the she opens nerva Diaries and sees nothing unless the guy who drew lines for her speech back in episode one went missing and they hired a new guy who W uped them and said how about instead of lines we draw nothing then a round table full of wild card employees agreed stamped it and moved on trudon show up but we have a campfire and in the game they're scared of fire however the show wipes their ass with this information and the trudon run right past it attacking the parasaur they fall down a pit and now we're dealing with the saber-tooth I'm glad her way out of this one wasn't theasaurus P or Megalania drool this time the the screenwriter starts typing Chinese woman saves the day her name is mayin and she visibly cringes at Helena's lame excuse of Chinese this whole scene feels like the screenwriter messed up and realized next scene was entering the cave so surprised the pit Helena fell into by complete accident because of trudon is also where the cave entrance resides coincidences right Mayan explains a bounty is set out for Helena then Helena is like oh my God he didn't turn me in wow thanks the next scene and Arthur plera appears but it's the size of a compy in the show and May in drops an insane secret about them the spit acid they sit down and decide to chill relax because a long trip lies ahead and Mayan pulls out an otter she killed earlier if I was Helena I'd take this as a red flag who would kill an otter Helena asked why mayin didn't take the artifact from her while she was sleeping and mayin takes a chance to Gaslight Helena with a love and Trust speech but in reality mayen could turn Helena into a sushi at will before she even realizes then although nobody asked for it a flashback the flashback shows her mom talking about herself like she's a fighter but in reality she just holds up signs at Alm protest thankfully flashback ends and the journey through the cave resumes they go through a moon pool that is totally balanced and then we get a wide shot showing this cave is insanely op they should definitely add it to the game this is followed by some serious expositional yapping that goes on for 2 minutes Mayan saves Helena from falling into a hole but after a bunch of Onyx fly out we realize the hole is where they must go now coincidence Helena cracks the code for the artifact which is revealed to be the pack artifact the gay opens and they've unknowingly summon the brood mother in the game you need an army of 20 megatheriums or cap pumps but in the show Helena who spawned 2 days ago and may Yin have it under control we get another flashback and then Helena realizes that Arenal will turn on each other for liquid element it takes about seven tiny spiders munching on the broodmother to put it down this is gamma at most the real reward from this should be Tech tur engram but a tech rifle pops up instead Helena turns it on and decides to permanently Nerf my dream cave by blasting a massive hole on the wall Mayan says this weapon could restore the alliance and end nerva Empire the obelis then shines green telling the entire Island something's going on because scary is the only Real Genius in the show he pops up again with his buddy KFC men and ghilly popup the new character and mayin know each other then she doxes his name JN I was thinking more like Dances with Wolves but JN works just fine episode three Jon's goons are all aiming at Mayan's head but she pulls out the tech rifle like nothing and nobody is shook by this try pulling that off in front of an officer in the us with three Shades Darker Than a Twilight vampire but then a small girl pops up and they go from nearly ending each other's Bloodlines to inviting them over to stay at the village and shoot the [ __ ] so these guys live in the Redwoods and they travel on Diplo Jon and mayen talk about their old Alliance and she tries to convince Jon to reform it the little girl whose name I still don't know was basically adopted by John when she spawned in that's all you need to know we get a nice cut scene of the village don't ask me how the Diplo get up there okay they stay down there like The Peasants they are then a Rex casually pops up behind the tree May and reunites with their green Rex we don't even get a name for it but later in the show we're supposed to care when it dies anyways down the elevator like a boss is Henry the inventor this is probably the guy who leaves medium crop plot blueprints in your drops so this is your chance to root for his downfall Helena was just welcomed here and she's already walking into rooms Uninvited it's a room with a bunch of ill villagers suffering from Arc swamp fever AKA covid AKA AIDS they haven't figured out transferring to Scorch gets rid of it the girl walks in and drops swap fever L and Helena then the meeting John and May in were moves into the SWAT fever room Helena is told the blue flowers healed people from the fever but a big bird ate them now big bird lays blue eggs so in a safe bet Helena assumes she can heal people with the blue egg off they go on Blue Egg Expedition but not before we get a Native American flashback I'm going to be honest I have barely slept I rewatched the scene 10 times and I still don't know what happened but here's the flashback in 10x speed let me know what you can cook before they go to find the blue egg Helena hops in Arena the screenwriter then gives aberration the Finger by spawning in the climbing pick engram on island Helena then disturbs a deor on Nest the female Green Arrow saves a day with a couple of clean shots they pause the mountain climbing and Helena gets to draw some explor notes she also practices her aim and then Dancing With Wolves explains her face should be relaxed we cut to dinner and we're revealed that the girl has swap fever then her stepdad or adoptive dad realizes so we get another flashback showing Jon suffered the loss of his family and Village because he chose revenge over his family which is why he is so protective of his new stepdaughter there you go John low explained they walk right into a huge nesting ground of petties snatch the blue EG and dip but of course not without waking up every py in the mountain awesome escape scene follows with the stepdaughter saving the day hitting another clean shot things only get worse because now the P's figured out picking but then Helena relaxes her face and hits a 360 no scope to the P's neck meanwhile John figures out how to ride a Pteranodon with no saddle what a g we can always rely on the screenwriter to make some quick typing to save the day finally I figure out the girl's name alasie they need to give her the blue stuff that's inside the egg quickly so when we think we're about to witness a py abortion the egg cracks revealing a quo instead but inside there is Smurf juice that Helena drops on Al Lassie's lips Smurf juice saves her life the grandma is healed and proud of Helena's wit and now John lets alasie join the ccel meetings because she hit some sick shots everything was sunshine and rainbows until the blonde woman dies in front of them then guy in a palovia starts rushing towards Helena but he gets taken down immediately I don't know what his plan was the blonde woman utters her last words of gibberish dies confusing everyone a woman they can't even understand dies and now their entire objective is set around freeing the other slaves in the camp let's go hype episode four begins they give this woman a whole funeral and revenge purpose for Helena so they get to the mining camp and think of a way to infiltrate it but first they have to tame stegosaurus why cuz we want to see more dinos there's a juvenile stego in the field whose trust they must acquire to tame the entire stegosaurus family alasi somehow accidentally trips into a 40ft Stegosaurus and a Chase ensues but when the stegos realize she gave the baby a tomato that grows on trees they didn't know she was chill like that and rejoice time to infiltrate the mining camp so in this Camp the soldiers forc compies to fight for the fun of it I already like these guys her name is Domina our new villain who works for nerva alasi gets instantly recognized behind the mask and the plan fails in Olympic record-breaking times Helena is brought in for interrogation but we learn about Domina instead and how she's a gladiator too on the other hand elassi is dropped into a pit with two Dills at least Gladiators were given a sword in the game dillow have Aimbot but in the show they become drunk Stormtroopers Dominus says a couple of more generic evil things to make you hate her more and we cut to our protagonist and chains good thing Allan the arthro was vibing inside an Arms Reach hole and yeah yeah their spit melts chains oh and her next plan is to whip lashad doa's ass with a metal chain to escape the mines the anky she hides by does nothing to help his tribe because someone whistled him passive we run back into Domina and they scuffle the blonde woman was called anaka if you even care alasi convinces all the Yankees to inside their tribe somehow and freed the slaves the bridge gets open and the stles begin to Russian that's when Domino reveals her pet U tyrannis who Roars the dinos to chill May in and Domino have a 1 V one and then a wreck saddled by Jon saves the day this poor guy took 10 arrows at once but only five men and Gilly show up they must know some reload glitch Helena gets thrown a bow Rex and yudi have an epic 1 V one over the bridge Helena strikes an arrow in domin's hand allowing Jon's Rex to bite the yudi's ankle apparently if the rider goes idle so does the dino Domina tries to make the cliche argument that the heroes are the same as the bad guys thankfully Jon ends the argument sending her down into the deaths the foreshadowing here is obvious we know water prevents all fall damage and Dinos only take fall damage while being ridden Helena is nearly stabbed by Ed Sheeran but instead of taking an easy kill she lets him get away after he begs for his life he whistle follows his Pria and dips second chance to shoot her shot but she imagines the people she's seen die as the Pria Rider and doesn't shoot a disappointed May in ends episode 4 episode 5 begins with nerva giving a speech that Shivers Rockwell's Timbers basically nerva is angry at his incompetence nerva grabs Rock by the neck and Bullies him more back at redwoods mayen is training the Slaves by making them do slave work the slaves that she just freed makes sense Helena brings her 21st century rights into this and stops their training to let them rest we get a Mayan flashback to her as a kid training with Grandpa and her brother back to Ark elassi claims that setting this war map took all day but all I see is four Dino action figures and three humans placed around the map the members of Council call this strategy mayen led the last Alliance into a Slaughter so Henry who I hope you haven't forgotten thinks mayen shouldn't lead the alliance so the council decides to debate over the alliance leader in 5 days time everyone leaves the council room with the gamechanging tech rifle in hands of Helena if there was ever a time for some nice character development it was now later in the kitchen the anky dossier is revealed to us and a Megalania Pops in the room we are given a reminder that the dodo is still not a chicken nugget Helena agre re to being trained while healing Mayan's wounds and so they begin to fight with sticks hide the stones before they break some bones Helena trains her weight sta by carrying two lros in buckets if I was a listro I'd take this as a disc is wild card calling them chubby she trains speed running with gamus and then she leveled melee again the quo's getting bigger John now says elassi has a mind for a strategy I'll call back to her action figure War map mayin and Helena play fight over her diary and Titanic music goes off in the background the SP powders are going off serious yapping ensues prompting a mayin flashback where grandpa gives mayin some SI CSO skins that dropped that weekend but when they were interrupted by ninjas who eventually take down Grandpa mayin Waits until grandpa is certainly slain to help killing all the ninjas and avenging Grandpa this is no doubt one of my favorite scenes so far this is an actual good flashback not the Australian lives matter protest flashback we saw from Helena constantly while walking around the village a fireball launches into a Hut m then drops mind warping information we are under attack nerva and Roa are pulling up on bronos the village Retreats while the main characters fight back Jon takes the tech rifle then asks elassi to tell him where the enemies are there she says Jon tells elassi to run and gives her a knife he's now coping Mayan's Grandpa Helena saves the old lady once again mayin takes down a bunch of men and Flack The Villagers are chased into the swamp by men on Raptors but John Tech rifles them out of Oblivion nerva spots May in and jumps down to fighter Helena the delusional tries to help this ends as expected Mayan smashes nerva hat and the 1 V one begins back at the swamp well things are going just fine get it off Rockwell then loads a Tran D onto a crossbow I thought we needed long necks for this Mayan and nerva keep sword fighting but then Rockwell shoots the dart and puts her to sleep ruining the honorable 1 V one they were having this makes nerva ma the villagers take a final look back at their burning home I hope they come back later for all that charcoal Fade to Black episode 5 ends episode 6 begins with a May Ying flashback where they celebrate a victory against the same Empire who killed their parents and grandfather her brother wants a diplomatic resolution but may just wants more blood back to Ark oh yeah she's in nura's Dungeon now nerva expresses his admiration for May it is revealed that nerva is the first face May in lays her eyes upon same face he tries to bite off but because nerva has a masters in geometry he stands right out of May yin's reach Rockwell comes in with food but mayin is in Ramadan and kicks it away we also find out Rockwell insided May Yin earlier by putting narcotics in the alliance's feeding troughs instead of leaving him on red May Yin delivers spit to his left eye the good guys assemble for a meeting in a cave and discuss extremely advanced war strategies with four action figures and a generic map it's time to save May in but the walls are too high good thing there's a Megalania next to them that can climb it alas he makes a whole bunch of friia Curry or Enduro stew I don't know and I don't care alas he thinks she will be taken to tomorrow's battle but John leaves her behind cuddling with a quzo and a doo scary the parasaur is also told to stay but don't worry he magically reappears whenever the screenwriter runs out of ideas to save Helena Henry who avoids every battle gives Jon a bag of adrenal Chrome they shake hands and johon hops in the Megalania that Sprints towards nervous Fortress when another Vietnam flashback pops up Mayan is presented with a dilemma save her brother or kill the emperor who had her Granda murdered the bloodthirsty son of a chooses Revenge the emperor predicts this move which is why he brought every single last troop to the castle or Temple the director gives us a flashback within a flashback which triggers mayen into Super Saiyan mode while taking arrows in the back she jumps towards the emperor and stabs him in the heart then she also dies Megalania begins walking up the 200t vertical incline John gives Helena a flare gun and some spark pder to light the place on fire Helena spots May in crucified and forgets the entire Mission Helena is found by Ed Sheeran and they fist fight she then brings out a bow from a fist fight and takes the shot she should have taken three episodes ago Ed Sheeran then utters his last words Helena frees May in they smile and boom nerva shows up with 30 goons and Flack Helena then tells General nerva to surrender while she is surrounded by probable death nerva obviously Chuckles Jon announces himself instead of just attacking them off guard Rex is then Rush In And epic Avenger music takes over followed by a fight Montage Rockwell is watching this situation unfold from the comfort of his porch a horn is blown and apparently this can open a gate now a giga comes out of this nobody heard the Giga or saw it before it's a complete surprise it also looks nothing like a giga but we have to assume it is because it's three times bigger than the rexes Mayan's green Rex dies and she is sad but we only cry when dogs die in movies not dinosaurs that we don't even know the name of John cuts off Rock wolves hand but don't worry pal you'll soon have eight nerville and his Giga seem to have won the fight but Dances with Wolves is ready to dance this is also when elassi wakes up and reads A goodbye letter from John while he fights nerva 30 men in flax surround Helena and guess what scary or should we call him Carrie the parasaur shows up with a gem tied around his neck which he swings around to annihilate the men and flak instead of just helping John Helena dips and pops her flare gun basically signaling I'm safe you can die now peace Good Luck instead of chewing up John in one bite the giga gives him a love tap to the side Jon smiles when he sees the flare he knows that they are all safe and he can now go all out instead he just dies oh wait he shoots a flame arrow through Giga legs and blows up the oil barrels causing a nuclear explosion and killing the Giga yes the Giga was killed by this but nerva is chilling Jon Dies and reunites with his family in the afterlife basically to get to the ark you first lose loved ones then you die for those loved ones and then you spawn an arc when you die in Arc you go back to your loved ones in the afterlife Mayan wakes up and sees they kiss unexpected plot twist no we cut to an rgy landing on a mountain and the writer delivers the news that Dances with Wolves has been clapped by nerva so the generic King in generic Throne screams and finally I didn't want to spoil it but I have a cameo on the show generic King drops a whole lot of yapping and then pitch black we get a second season teaser the part two teases that fish lives don't matter bronos do neck curls Boby spawns unscorched Domina as I said didn't take fall damage monkey boss fights soon Tech B already Rockwell's turning purple he also drops a hard quote for what are the laws of nature yeah whatever nerva has a teex sword V diesel gets paid a lifetime salary for saying three words let's do this don't worry the flashbacks won't go anywhere overall this was a really enjoyable watch I'm hyped for season 2 this idea of people from different eras reuniting in one same timeline is actually a really cool concept thank you wild card for this series if this video hits 333 likes I will make a review for the season 2 as well peace so

Channel: Imian

Views: 181,230

Keywords: ark, ark the animated series, ark the animated series review, ark animated series, ark survival evolved, ark survival ascended, ark animated series recap

Id: nKDf6uLmzAg

Length: 26min 58sec (1618 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 23 2024