Why Are Some People So Annoying?

uh quarantine haircuts need to be a thing actually quarantine gone needs to be a thing so haircuts can be a thing once again hi my name's father mike schmitz and this is ascension presents i'm not sure if you're someone who gets easily annoyed um i know that there was a time in my life when i was like really easy easily annoyed i have a number of pet peeves one of those pet peeves my um my family and some good friends know about this like i hate hate just like people who chew with their mouth open like that just um anyone it doesn't matter who you are unless maybe you're a child in which case i'm like oh that's kind of cute whatever i've gotten better at dealing with it another thing that was annoying i remember this happening all of the time in seminary um we'd be in the chapel maybe you've been there where it's like the adoration chapel you're kind of close to each other it's very very quiet no one's supposed to no one is supposed to be making any noise in this place they're supposed to be silent in adoration and they're like no but i'm praying the rosary so i need to like or even maybe not even worse but kind of just as bad where all you hear is right you hear that they're like dude you don't have to mouth the words and getting like so interiorly violently aggravated you know and you want to be that person who looks right maybe this happens to you like on an airplane or wherever it is you want to be you want to maybe you're driving and you see that person do the wrong thing and you want to look you want to look over at them so that they know they're dumb like it's not because they're dumb and they might have done something silly or i might yes be annoyed by the fact that they're making noises with their mouths when everyone in the room should be quiet or that they're chewing with their mouth open right but when it comes to being annoyed i think one of the first steps that i had to learn to get past a lot of this that's just it's such small stuff writes petty things the thing i had to learn was that it is a choice to be annoyed like if i'm annoyed by what someone else is doing that's because i chose to be annoyed and if any of us who are if you're watching this listening to this and if you find yourself often becoming annoyed maybe you need to hear this truth and i say it is a truth being annoyed is a choice and i know it's a choice why because well here's one one proof that being annoyed is choice we can have two different people do the exact same thing and with one person doing the exact same thing we're like we're fine with that doesn't bother me at all no actually maybe it's even adorable maybe it's even funny but a different person that maybe i don't like does the exact same thing and i'm like what the heck what the heck i can't even believe this person would do this kind of thing i'm so annoyed by them can you believe this person who said this or did this oh why was it fine when person a did it but i'm super annoyed person b did it it's because i chose to be annoyed because being annoyed is a choice in fact i remember hearing the story about these this group of men who were pows in vietnam they were put into a very very small room um with basically their quarters when they were not kind of allowed outside of this shack they were in this shack it was very very small terrible conditions where they basically had a in order to sleep they kind of had to they had to sleep touching each other essentially so really really cramped conditions and whenever a new person arrived they would say okay here's our agreement the agreement of all these men who are living in this very very small um environment they said we've agreed we've decided to agree that if i become annoyed with something you do like you're picking your toenails your whatever the things that could be annoying right i can go down the list but let's just spare ourselves from that if i'm being annoyed by something that you're doing i'm going to take responsibility and say that's my fault that if i'm annoyed with you that's my fault and i think that's such a such a freeing kind of a thing um i mean back in the chapel the person's making noise with their mouth when it's supposed to be quiet like well if i'm annoyed by that why would i let that steal my peace if someone does something terrible on the road that you know cut me off or whatever the thing is like yeah that could be wrong but why let that steal my peace like i can acknowledge that it's wrong but why would i let that lead me to a place i don't like being annoyed so why would i choose to be annoyed being annoyed is a choice i think there's three potential responses to annoyance one is i can rise above it that's the first one well sorry there's four one is i can just be annoyed like i can say you need to stop that or else i'm my day is ruined okay that's one but the positive ones are i can rise above it i can actively choose to rise above this thing um i can exercise patience and i can exercise understanding some of the people that i've been around who have shown chewed child chewed their food with their mouths open are people who i'm like what the heck you know when i when i did express this they were like well my nose is stuffed i can't breathe if i don't you know have my mouth open i'm like oh okay well i can i can choose to rise above this i can choose exercise patients i can choose to be merciful the second thing is i was thinking about this in terms of we were in our chapel a bit earlier this week and the smoke alarm in another room was going off it was beeping and it was one of those pieces where i was that's what made me think of this whole thing about annoyance because i was kind of getting annoyed but i was like no i don't need to be annoyed um the second thing i could do so first thing obviously is i get annoyed second thing i rise above it the third thing is i can do something about it in fact that's why the smoke alarm starts beeping you know when the battery is getting low it starts beeping and like that is so annoying well i can do something about it like i can i can allow this feeling of distress inside of me this feeling of annoyance to um move me in a positive way to address this in a positive way that makes sense okay so first i can give into the annoyance do not recommend number two rise above it exercise patience and mercy and compassion all these things number three do something about it like let it move you to positive action and the fourth thing is based off of a quote from i think saint jose maria escriva saying how's maria esquivas said this he said never say that person annoys me simply say that person sanctifies me because you know in in our world we're with our fallen hearts our broken human nature we always want what we want right like i i want what i want and if you're doing something i don't like well it annoys me but it's me having to put up with someone else someone else's will someone else's decision someone else's choices but to be able to let go of my will let go of my desire let go of what i would prefer in this moment is a dying to solve even if it's a small dying to self so it isn't just annoying it's potentially sanctifying so if i'm willing to say yeah no i yeah i wouldn't i would like it to be otherwise but you know what it's not otherwise lord use this i mean again it can be super small but the lord uses great things and uses small things so annoyance or being annoyed is a choice i can one choose to give into it i can two rise above it i can three do something about it and i can four allow it to sanctify me next time you get annoyed which might be because this video is going on for so darn long choose one of those four or maybe choose number two three and four anyways from us here at ascension presents my name's father mike god bless maybe that wink thing's annoying i don't know maybe the whatever annoying i don't even know all the annoying things that i probably do with my life i don't even know man the list goes on and on yeesh

Channel: Ascension Presents

Views: 116,166

Rating: 4.9648433 out of 5

Keywords: pet peeves, annoyed?, annoying things, annoying people, when people annoy you, St. Josemaria Escriva, Fr. Mike, Fr. Mike Schmitz, Ascension Presents, Ascension Press, grow in patience, positive action, getting annoyed, annoyances, what annoys you?, annoying, frustrated?, frustrating, offering it up, offer it up, small sacrifices, annoying things people do, dealing with annoying people, offering up suffering catholic, inconveniences

Id: XE07Jk2a6po

Length: 7min 38sec (458 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 29 2020