- I'll piggyback off of that one. Did they know that you were a virgin? - Yeah, mine did. - Mine too. - Yeah, mine knew. - Mine didn't. - Hmm. Okay, you two switched
for that. (all chuckles) (upbeat music) - I here have a theory that I look like I've seen a thing or two. - Yeah. - And have been seeing a
thing or two for a while. But I was gonna say, I think
the same is true of you. I would even put you like ahead of me, but I love your aesthetic anyway. I think I expected people to think that I'm into hardcore, stuff like that, and have had a really colorful past. - You look like you have
demons, respectfully. - I love that. That's the goal. - I think- - I should go in your spot? - No, her. - Okay. - Me? (all chuckles) Right at the front? - No, not in the front.
In my spot right here. - Over here? Okay. - I feel like I would
switch places with you and go in the middle.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Just somewhere in the middle. - I feel as though you
should be back here. I think you're the quiet achiever. - I think so. I think she's... - So I would say even, yeah, maybe even at the front here, yes. - Even based on appearance, I think I would actually
put you ahead of me. - Okay. - I have a feeling that you
shouldn't be that far down. - Me? - You should pop down somewhere in here. - Like in the middle? - I don't know where to position myself. - I'd say maybe towards the
middle, right over here. - Okay. - I don't know where to put myself, so I'm just gonna leave
it, maybe, I don't know. - I feel like she's very confident in the fact that she should
be further up, so maybe- - In the middle. In the middle at least. - Put yourself where
you think you might fit. - I feel like here.
Here's good. (chuckles) (upbeat music) - Maybe we can talk about
like relationships status. Are you guys in a relationship
or married or you know. - I am single. I have a
couple side pieces but... - I go on so many different dates, and my longest relationship would have to be three or four years. - I'm single. I haven't been in one for
a little while, I'd say. - I'm married and I've been
with him for eight years, so- - [All] Wow. - I haven't been married for eight years. I've been together with my
husband for eight years. - I'm married and I've been
with him four years, I guess. I hadn't dated anybody longer than a year until I met my husband. - I am in the longest
relationship I've ever been and now we've been together
for around a year and a half. I wanna put you ahead of me because you've been in a
relationship for eight years. - Yeah, I'm not sure 'cause relationships, like they can be a starting point, but of course that
doesn't dictate everything in terms of losing your virginity. - So true. - I feel like I wanna wanna move myself. Am I okay to do that? - I kinda wanna switch with you. - Yes. - I feel like I'm the most
unstable in my relationships, so. - Do you guys feel, like you had an adequate sexual education? - My parents talked to me about it before, was share with me in sixth
grade, you know, in school. Did your parents talk to you about sex or did you find out from a
sibling or from a peer or? - I learned about it at school, and through my friends'
experiences as well. - I was around 11 or 12. My mom gave me a book about
puberty and everything, and was saying "If you have any
questions just let me know." - My mom talked to me
about it when I was eight. But unfortunately, in middle school, I really grasped it
because of the internet. - I feel like I had an
adequate sexual education. Between school and my
mom was really religious, so she was like wait till marriage. - I was really young, I
guess, compared to the group. I was in maybe second grade, and one of my best friends
in elementary school told me about sex, and her parents were very
open with her about sex. So she like told me in
graphic detail everything and I was really fascinated by it, but also would pray every night for years that God would make me forget what it was 'cause I felt really bad
about knowing what it was. Horny information. (all chuckles) - Yeah. I remember being grossed out. I asked my mom, I was like,
"You do this with dad?" And she's like, "Yeah, once a week." And I was just like, oh,
I couldn't look at my dad. - Okay, well, based on the fact that you had like confusing
mixed signals about sex, I would say I don't agree with
y'all's position in general, so I think you should be
all the way at the end. - Okay. - I don't know if I'm allowed to ask this but has anyone ever felt
like there was a time in life where they were afraid to have sex? - I was afraid being hurt, being vulnerable to somebody
taking that from me, so yes. - You know, people would tell
me, like different stories, and like how much it hurts, and mainly it was like
a physical fear for me. - Yeah, I was definitely
agree that I was afraid, more afraid of it not meaning
to them what it meant to me. - I was never, ever,
ever afraid to have sex. I wanted to have it as soon
as I found out what it was. I think, gonna scoot
down a little bit, yeah. Did a lot of y'all grow up religious? - I'm Christian. I didn't grow up Christian
but I became Christian. - I grew up as a dancer, so
everything was very sexualized. So obviously when I dance
I'm telling a story, and clothes I wear, I feel like I like to embrace
that femininity about me. - I think you should be a
little further down, here? - Yeah.
- Yeah. - Okay. - I grew up Mormon. - Okay. Extra fun. (chuckles) - Yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah. - Even though I grew up
Christian and still am Christian, I never felt like sex was damned, even masturbation was presented, I remember in a Sunday school class as like being optional,
you know, being okay. - I was told something that was
really triggering to my OCD. In church, I was told
that masturbating, sorry, that masturbating is wrong because it means that your
partner means less to you and that you're like
stealing pleasure from them. And it's like sad 'cause
I've loved my partners and that's not true. - You know, in a way if you
don't have a partner, it's like, well, what are you supposed
to do with yourself then? - So it's something that
I had explored previously. And as a Christian, I personally don't really believe that I should be doing that, so it's something that I try to avoid. I never want to hurt anyone's feelings or come across as like mean or rude, and I think it's just a different view, it's a different value. - I have a confession and
I've never watched porn ever. And I think it's because I
don't find most men attractive. - I guess that that brings up the question of like when we talk about having sex, are we talking about having sex with men? - You know, if penetration is
losing virginity for somebody or if-
- Somebody's a lesbian. - Yeah, somebody's a lesbian,
then it's like if you do oral, maybe they would say like, "Oh I lost my virginity that way." - Right. - But I feel like it's
more about the intimacy, like you said, it's like so how, when did you break your virginity? Where do we draw the line there? Going back to what you were saying. - And break, I love the... I heard you say that earlier,
"Break your virginity." - Yeah, break your virginity. So in Australia, we call
it breaking virginity. I think breaking my
virginity is more intense, so I feel it really fits my story. Yeah, losing isn't so hardcore. - I have a question. Were
you guys popular growing up? - No. (all laughing) We'll start there. - I was popular at school, I think 'cause I was a dancer and... - You look like you were
popular, like the blonde. - [Stephanie] The hair, the curly hair. - I was more of like a like academic jock, but still I never felt like I measured up to like the super popular crowd. - I think in regards to your story about how popular you were athletically, you get to know a lot of
people and be more social. I think you and I should switch spots. - Okay. - I was definitely a partier in college, and I started drinking
when I was in middle school but it was definitely mostly to fit in. - There was a comment made
that you seem really confident, and I've been observing you and
I totally think that's true. I kind of want to put
you between me and her. - Okay. (chuckles) - Has anybody in the group
taken somebody's virginity? - I know I've taken
one person's virginity. I didn't like it. (chuckles) - I try to avoid that situation, so if someone didn't tell
me that I wouldn't know. - It actually happened
to me pretty recently. I had taken somebody's
virginity and their first kiss. According to them, it was
a really good experience. - I still feel like you're
down here somewhere though. - Where? Where am I going? - Maybe. Yeah. (all chuckles) You're like the dark horse
that we have to watch. - Yeah.
- I feel. - When you all lost your virginity, was it to somebody who was also a virgin? - Yes.
- No. - No. - No. - No. - No. - No. No. - I'll piggyback off of that one. Did they know that you were a virgin? - Yeah, mine did. - Mine too. - Yeah, mine knew. - Mine knew. - Mine didn't. - Hmm. Okay, you too switched for that. - Okay. I feel like you were trying to bag one, you know what I mean? Like get it over with. - Hmm.
(all chuckles) I don't wanna respond to
that right now. We'll see. - I think you're too far down. - Where should I go? - In between these dresses. - I actually think you're ahead of me, so I would like to put
you between me and her. - I feel like you should go ahead though. I don't know. I'm not sure. - You seem curious, I
feel like you maybe you, yeah, experimental earlier.
- Or maybe. - I guess since this spot's
empty, I'll come over here. - Hey, good humans. We know that conversations
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out SILA Cruise by LELO and use promo code Jubilee at checkout. And now let's get back to the episode. (playful music) - [Facilitator] So in
the 7th spot, Deanna. (playful music) In the 6th spot, Sidney. (playful music) In the 5th spot, Christina. (playful music) - Wow. - Sluts. - Yeah. (all chuckling) - [Facilitator] In the
4th spot, Stephanie. (playful music) So in the 3rd spot, Sarah. In the 2nd spot, Nicki. (playful music) And in the 1st spot, Amanda. (all chuckles) - So what's the tail? - I was 15. My friend wanted to lose her virginity so she was talking to this guy, and she was like, "Oh, he
always has this friend with him so can you come and hang out?" And I ended up liking him. He took his mom's van, and
we all went to the woods. I lost my virginity
listening to Pretty Ricky with my friend and his friend
watching us in the backseat. (chuckles) So, that's what it was. - I was 16 and I really
wanted to lose my virginity, and I found a boy who I thought was cute. We went to homecoming together, and then we kind of snuck away, and went back to his parents'
house and we did it upstairs. - I was 19 and I was having a sleepover with my then guy best friend. So one night he told me he loved me, but we were just kissing and I was like, I feel intuitively right about this now. And now we've been together
for like a year and a half. - I lost our virginity at 22. I lost it to my current
husband on our wedding night. - Oh my God. - And we waited eight years to do it. Like everyone was like,
"Oh, are you like pumped? Are you so excited? Like it's the night." Obviously, like pretty
expressive about like, "Oh my gosh, really
excited for the wedding. Multiple reason. One reason
being able to have sex, right?" - I lost mine at 22. It was from a person who I got into a relationship
with over a dating app. One night when we were at his place just cuddling and watching a movie, we talked about it a little
bit more and I felt ready then. - So I was 28 when I broke my virginity. So I'd waited my whole life
for that special somebody, and it wasn't for religious
reasons, like I said, it was something that I
wanted to give my partner. So I waited and I found
out he was married. - Oh gosh.
- Oh my gosh. - Yeah, it wasn't the
best experience for me, so now I have trust issues. - [Christina] Yeah. - I was 41 when I lost my virginity to the man that I'm now married to. I'm 45, so I literally
dated over a hundred guys. Part of it was like, oh, I
wasn't finding the right guy, but most of it was because I was chasing
like unavailable men. I mean, we flew to this
island called Huahine in French Polynesia,
had sex in a bungalow, and he brought along
these little sex cards, like different sex positions to try out. So it was playful and tried
it several times in that day and figured out what worked, and he did propose a couple days later. So, and here we are. - Wow.
- Wow. (light music) - So many people carry unnecessary shame about losing their virginity
too late or too early, and there's no right time objectively. - But I think there is a part
of sexual empowerment too where you can draw your own boundaries, and you don't feel like you
have to owe anybody sex. What I was looking for was a committed and loving
relationship, and it's hard, it's really hard to find that out there. And if that's what you're
looking for, don't give up. - Final thoughts? Hmm. Have sex. (chuckles) - How soon did you tell
your friends after? I just told my best friend. - I told everyone. It's funny. - I would say given my the situation, people probably assumed. - Definitely told my mom the next day. Anybody else tell their mom?
- Yeah, I told my mom. - I think my mom still
thinks I'm a virgin. (all laughing)
