What Was "The Incident" At A Family Gathering? - (r/AskReddit)

our /oscar etic my planet reddit NSFW what's the worst thing that's happened at your family gathering grandma died sitting on the couch and we all thought she was sleeping so we went on with dinner we all ate drank and were merry until the wee hours of the morning until somebody tried to wake her up nobody knew what to think about the fact we partied next to grandma's corpse for like six hours this didn't happen to me but I watched it happen and it was awful my cousin was pregnant from a guy who she had only been dating for a few months but he was a good guy on Christmas Eve she invited him to our family gathering and when we were exchanging presents he grabbed a small box from the tree and was two seconds from getting down on one knee when that uncle jokingly says god I hope you're not proposing everyone laughs and this poor guys and a half bent knee half standing pose and just looks up at that uncle and slowly powers through it and slowly gets down on one knee and proceeds to ask her if she'll marry him she said yes and they're engaged but it was one of the worst 45 seconds of my life cheers to the first heartwarming worst story I've seen so far in this soul-crushing thread got what an ass I'm not one to hold a grudge but I'd be seriously peep about that moment for decades Thanksgiving about 1985 family gathering at my parents home mom dad brother sister grandma's aunts uncles cousins etc all watching football cousin picks up the remote to mess with the volume but turns on the VCR on accident full-blown porno fills the screen dad leaves grabs the remote and fumbles frantically to turn it off bible-thumper brother and sister-in-law snatch up their kids and leave cousin says boy that sudden death can really get intense this is like the equivalent of two kids playing with a gun they think isn't loaded always clear the chamber dad oh he cleared his chamber all right my step Minh never got along with her sister-in-law brother's wife they got into a fistfight one Thanksgiving at my grandparents house grandma got mad and called the police my dad was a police officer at the time guess who showed up to arrest his wife and sister-in-law so how did that play out did he actually arrest them or just tell them to smarten up I was really young so I don't remember why the fight started two other officers showed up with my dad and they had to arrest my aunt because she was flipping out and acting crazy stepmom just got a summons to appear in court and was eventually let off because it was obvious that my crazy aunt started it all we no longer speak to her law great grandma's funeral in Arkansas I have some distant third cousin named stormy again this is Arkansas and we are all gathered around the grave and as the preacher starts to lead us in prayer you hear this awful noise every turns to look and there is stormy swinging an armadillo around his head by the tail one of my other cousins got him to put the armadillo down so we could finish the service but I don't recall ever having seen him at another family gathering since then edit yes stormy is male he was about 19 at a time yes the armadillo was alive apparently it had a nest Hall was taking a nap idk what armadillos do in their spare time under a nearby bush sounded kind of like a cat rejecting the advances of an unwanted lover that sounds as country as it can get my grandmother tried to shoot herself in the front yard because my mother wouldn't let me into my siblings six-four and to ride sitting on the back hood of my uncle's classic convertible during their neighborhood fourth of July parade she was angry that no one would be able to see our outfits if we were seated inside the car and while trying to shoot herself accidentally grazed my grandpa in the process good times edit it's called the trunk thx guys I'm going to pick my favorite stories from this thread and write a Wes Anderson style dark comedy about a dysfunctional family this [ __ ] is gold was this out of the blue or did you suspect she was a bit mental before this oh I have one this happened like a week ago at a little get-together a family at my house my brother-in-law and his wife got into a huge argument about their new baby's medical care but the little one had a terrible case of psoriasis and he blamed his wife for not staying on top of it causing it to bleed during this shouting match bill declared that if he was going to be raising some other man's baby he was going to be calling the ducking shots from the norm they have been married for ten years and have two other girls we were all so mortified we left my house ten other people got into cars and went to the park quick edit this was my husband's brother and his wife [ __ ] has to get pretty awkward before you leave your own house to make things better it was brutal several of us had suspected she stepped out but this was a bomb my youngest brother got into my car with his salad bowl still in his hand proposed to my girlfriend at my birthday party and she said no then told me she had been cheating on me this was post cake bullet dodged think of it this way at that exact point in time that was probably one of the best outcomes oh yay I couldn't be happier now she ended up getting back with her ex guys she cheated on me with who had cheated on her I think it was four times fast-forward now it's five Beach during Christmas with the family we discovered the hard way that my little sister who was three years old was prone to febrile seizures everyone was freaking out while my little sister was blue and foaming at the mouth Edit febrile seizure not epileptic edit - this was ten years ago she stopped having them after a year or two she's now perfectly normal my coolest grandparent had a seizure I was in late high school at a time and had to take all the little kids upstairs and distract them while everyone else waited for the ambulance etc I remember trying to teach them to count to 10 in Japanese because I just learned in school and it was the only thing I could think to pass the time good on you for helping in a stressful situation aunts uncles and dad start arguing over my grandfather's possessions after his passing in his house after his funeral lots of yelling pushing get the duck out that day eventually pulled my dad out of the house in an effort to save the family they never recovered my uncle passed away without ever speaking with my dad again and the others speak a bit to each other but we haven't had any family events it's been three years Christmas at my auntie's house with my whole extended family on my dad's side and their pets in particular these two dogs one of which was very fond of the other and this dog decided he wanted to have his way with the smaller uninterested dog long story short the large dog came all over the kitchen floor leaving a huge mess that we had to clean up before eating our dinner okay so not family related but my friend worked at a vet's in high school there was this pug that would get bored and lick his own dong until he came in his own face it did this many times my friend's pug Coheed its leg and started pissing while standing on top of a small hill lost its footing and proceeded to roll to the bottom of the hill pissing all over itself the whole way down ten stroked ten pugs are entertaining Thanksgiving back in 1998 I was eight years old and my wealthy grandparents decided to take the whole family to Maui for the week this included our five person family and around 15 extended family members all was great until Thanksgiving dinner my older cousins started bickering which turned into a pretty big altercation and some food throwing eight-year-old me out is loving it until the uncles get involved my 18 year old male cousin who was a total [ __ ] starts freaking out at my 15 year old female cousin calling her a horse for reasons unbeknownst to me at this point female Kazim's dad comes flying over and punches his nephew so hard that literally is thrown a few feet and nearly knocked out now the other uncle has to defend his son which results in a few punches between those two until my family can separate them there will never be a better Thanksgiving dinner and my grandparents will never take us anywhere again we gathered at my grandma's house where my mom and all her sisters had been raised my eldest aunt had done a bunch of dodgy stuff to glom all the Estates and the sisters had come and forced with their husbands and kids to try to talk sense into her it did not work they should have lawyer ed up but this was the 60s hell I don't know why they were all so weak all of us cousins had been kicked outside while the grown-ups argued I was just a little kid and I went in to get a glass of water she had put locks on the cupboard mean aunt came in and slapped me across the face so hard I was staggered I did not get water one of my older cousins found me crying and took me to town riding on his shoulders part of the way to buy me a soda at the drugstore and a few toys many years later my mom told me mean aren't most likely poisoned grandma and it seems true that's duct up I hope that the mean aunt is never invited to any family gatherings mean aunt has been dead for many years it took a number of years I guess for my mom to get hit with the idea of what happened to her mother she said it was something so awful she did not want to think it one day she told my dad that she had an awful thought and my dad answered I know what you are going to say and I have already thought it my grandma died in 1965 when I was five years old we came in from play and my mom was ironing clothes and crying when I was in my late teens my mom finally told me she thought her mom had been poisoned and after a bit of looking into what her symptoms were I think she was she lived with mean aunt who never married and was a real weirdo aunt taught first grade and spent part of the year in the tower we're the family home was the school year in a small city a few hours away grandma always came along and lived in an apartment with her on the face of it it seemed ok the widowed mother living with her unmarried daughter this was back in the day when medicine capsules could be taken apart and I think that is how she did the deed over a period of time grandma had many of the symptoms of arsenic poisoning and also thallium god this feels so ought to write this it sounds crazy she had nail changes some hair loss stomach pain vomiting she also was totally pissed that my dad did not marry her and threw a hissy fit on my folks wedding night I could go on telling stories but suffice it to say she was not a nice woman I remember he quite well my theory is that she was caught out by the town doctor and a lawyer and they blackmailed her both of them got stacks of cash and property from Maine and years later the lawyer was disbarred for criminally mishandling an estate sheesh while one of my aunts found out her husband was cheating on her with a 22 year old Chinese econ student he was 63 at a time so there's that what was the aftermath what went down I'm guessing the 22 year old Chinese econ student went down my mother-in-law's boyfriend randomly out of nowhere just says in case anyone was wondering I'm against gay marriage my mother-in-law to her credit looks at him and just said did anyone ask it was an awkward couple of minutes dude wanted a fight he usually does he's kind of a jackass my alcoholic uncle got so drunk out his own daughter's wedding that he pissed on the wedding cake in front of half the wedding party he quit drinking after that Lahey you drunk old duck time for some [ __ ] cake Bob Andy relatives showing off their weird-looking baby and people trying to not say anything awful about it being one of the first to greet them and thus having no warning all I could come up with was oh that's a baby I guess no blood was spilled but I felt like dirt afterwards this is any event with a new baby I second that very few babies are good-looking they need a few weeks to ripen i luckily miss this christmas cause me and my mom and dad were in disney my great-grandma had a dog can't recall what it was but it was super small since before I was born well one Christmas everyone is eating in the kitchen with a clear view of the dog in the back years in the middle of Christmas dinner a big Doberman came into the backyard and ripped the little dog's throat out kind of ruined Christmas whoa that sucks five years or so ago I went to my aunt and uncle's Christmas party my one cousin spilled some alcoholic eggnog and the family dog drank a lot of it before they realized to clean it up and the eggnog was powerful anyway the dog starts going through every stage of alcohol poisoning and we just had to watch and hope for the best because no vets were on call around us due to Christmas anyway me and a few cousins were in the garage and the dog is laying down with labboard breathing and we're comforting our one cousin who was younger and who was crying and we've got her more calmed down just petting the dog my grandma walks in and she has never been um too sensitive I guess she takes one look at the dog and says hark the dogs gonna die and walks out and my cousin starts wailing again and all as elder cousins were angry haha anyway the dog lived and is still alive today it was just shitty that it all happened and I cannot imagine what it would be like to witness a family dog being ripped apart in front of everyone I really feel bad for your family and glad you didn't have to be there the whole affair is ruined and somber as it would be because that is traumatizing and a horrible Christmas present to have your dog died a coal now I feel sad my grandmother threw her prosthetic breasts at me I was watching the American football game during Thanksgiving while my relatives mostly female was sitting at the table within view of the living room suddenly I hear hey name and as I tend to look in that direction this blob comes at me and I reactively catch it they start laughing and I realize that I'm holding my grandma's hid never has a breast been rejected by my hand so quickly we had a huge family dinner at a very fancy restaurant my great aunt decided to move a very fancy pot of flowers with some peacock feathers stuck in it out of the way in this case out of the way meant right above the candles it turns out peacock feathers burn incredibly fast and produce a lot of smoke the whole restaurant had to be evacuated to be honest it wasn't really that bad the dinner had been incredibly boring 14 um we certainly thought the fire made things more interesting 14 you who was right low 50 Y oh he thinks the same thing my extended family ostracized my parents there was a big rift in the family between one of my uncles and my mom he is very manipulative and all-around a huge a-hole they decided to sit down and gave my dad an ultimatum either it is amol my mom my dad grabbed my mom by the hand and left never looked back a dead rat inside the water tank this one day we woke up in a relative's house after a gathering night we found the morning water tastes weird sir my cousin and hosts check the water tank the rat was floating there everyone in his house headed to the hospital instantly edit a lot of people is asking me was a water tankers and why people would have one here where are live Rio de Janeiro Brazil sometimes we suffer with lack of water distribution especially in summer so we got a store the water we have in the tanks it's very common here that's it no biggie we once had a dead monkey inside our water tank we noticed something was wrong with the water but nobody bothered to look inside the tank me and my father took a peek inside the tank after like three days the smell was horrible the monkey was bloated to the size of a gorilla I have the smallest hand so I had to remove the monkey by my bare hands the monkey disintegrated upon my touch I was left with a handful of fur and skin scooped up the leftover fur skin flesh and whatnot by hand proceeded to use the same water for drinking bathing without issue it was too expensive to empty the tank and clean it so we took a chance this is a very common occurrence where I live the heat forces monkeys to climb into water tanks to drink water what in the dark well we have a family reunion annually in Virginia for some distant relatives on my mom's side the no one in my immediate family has attended until about seven years ago when my mother started driving my grandma to the reunion dad says that we could make it a family trip but mum brushed the idea off my parents divorced five years ago and the next year mom somehow cons me into attending the reunion with her and her new boyfriend everyone at the Reunion already knew her boyfriend turns out he had been taking him up to her family reunion for the last few years with my grandma I'm starting to believe my grandma never cared for my dad all that much my grandma was staying over with us at my parents house on Christmas Eve the evening went great and everyone was happy right as everyone's going to bed my grandma starts throwing up in her bed saying she feels horrible but she doesn't want us to call an ambulance because she doesn't want to trouble anyone on Christmas Eve she's like the epitome of a sweet old lady my parents called an ambulance anyways and good thing because it turns out she was having a heart attack she lived ended up having a quadruple bypass followed by a full recovery and our Christmas miracle she is still alive and kicking and still smart as a whip a Cougar's showed up and we had to lock ourselves inside the house with a shotgun until the cops arrived edit this is getting way more upvotes than is acceptable edit to edit harder gold row you people have worse taste than I thought I thought you were talking about your aunt edit I get I T he was though hey hey Samir let me show you what good+ feels like mum get the shotgun my 60 year old aunt showed me her new boobies and told me she'd take my vCard and show me what good kitten feels like she did this at the dinner table man I have to know more is she just ducking nuts was she drunk just a massive [ __ ] or are you like a perfect 10 stroked end with a sexual reputation that even your family members are drawn to if it was so casual clearly she does stuff like this alert what happened afterwards did everyone freak out did they just ignore it I don't know I'm no prize she was a druggie alcoholic that was property of a biker gang at the time if that gives you a better idea introduce to a distant cousin for the first time who was attend she was beautiful and I was told that she was deaf I had never met a deaf person we were both 15 years old I shook her hand and said to my brother who was standing next to me she is a babe she started to laugh I read lips he said edit clarification holy [ __ ] when I first read that comment I thought you meant she was 10 years old relax he said distant cousin so it's not incest was celebrating an uncle's birthday and we realized about 15 minutes into it that grandma died everyone lost their mind because she was 75 and seemed fine ten minutes before died of a massive brain aneurysm whole family was devastated I still took some cake I'll piggyback off of yours because it's so similar down to being at an uncle's birthday party my 53 year old mother stood up said I don't feel well and dropped from an aneurysm in front of all her friends and family I wasn't there when it happened but the funeral was particularly grim because almost everybody they had just witnessed her death she was the baby sister to the uncle whose birthday it was and they were best friends it traumatized him and he no longer celebrates his birthday Jesus I'm so sorry this happened just a couple months ago my wife is pregnant and we were a few months in we had gone to the doctor to find out the sex and were throwing a family party to deliver the news her family is very well-off and very large I'm talking 50 people within a five-block radius to her grandparents house my side of the family is super small just my mom stepfather and aunt come to the party so I supplemented my side with some of our mutual couple friends about an hour into the party we had everyone go outside for the reveal we prepare these stalkers filled with confetti either blue for male or pink for female for the announcement I thought it would be hilarious to make one filled with the opposite color but my wife said no anyways everyone gets a proper lines up on either side of the driveway 3 2 1 pop pink glitter and confetti fly in the air everyone is Hootin and Hollerin in celebration we start receiving congratulatory remarks from my friends and her family I made the announcement that we had come up with a name right after I said the name my mother comes up to me and says are you sure it's not a boy yes I'm very sure the doctor confirmed at last weekend at air starts to roll down her cheek and y'all are firm on the name what about my middle name Shawn I'll get with my wife but I think we are pretty set on the name we picked out she left shortly after that exchange without saying goodbye apparently right after the pop she turned to my friend who had just gotten her PhD and asked how reliable those sonograms are at determining sex of the child she gave us the cold shoulder for the next three months and has a collection of boy names ready just in case three doctors and a handful of nurses along about having a baby girl in December TL DR mother is sour about the sex of my unborn child why good question I think it has to do with her past history she had an older brother who didn't treat her very well verbally abusive and generally a douchebag her mother favored him over her and let him get away with everything it's just my guess but I think her disdain for a granddaughter comes from her past relationship with her brother it could also be that I was an only child and she has no clue what to do with another female she likes my wife but I get the feeling that she doesn't really try to get to know her it's bothered me but living across state lines has put a strain on everyone I'm currently working on finding a job that will take us back to South Texas where everyone lives or it could be that she said that the family name won't be passed on I confronted her about the weekend a few days after and she couldn't give me a straight answer as to why she acted the way she did I figure her emotions were running high and that everything will work itself out in the end it was the first time that she had interacted with her family since the wedding if she wants to continue to be a child after my child is born then I will push the topic further and force her to deal with her issues or not see my child thanks for watching subscribe for 3 videos a day [Music]

Channel: Ask Planet

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Id: lKhuWaavncA

Length: 25min 13sec (1513 seconds)

Published: Sun Jan 19 2020