Have you ever wondered about what would happen
if you discarded a narcissist first? Would they be happy that they got out
of the relationship without having to do it themselves? Or would they be bitter that you did it to them? The true reaction that they have, which we will get to in just a second,
may actually shock you as this is maybe the most emotional that a narcissist
will ever become after discarding a narcissist. You may start to realize
just how abusive and toxic the situation was. But before you can fully move on, you're going to want
to shut the door on that person once and for all. The cycle of abuse from the narcissist
can be brutal and complicated. So make sure to check out our other videos
on discarding and the other stages if you haven't yet. If you've ever dreamed about pushing a narcissist
out of your life for good. This is the video for you, so make sure to stick around
until the end for our best advice. Number 10: Get ready for the rage. Narcissists tend to lash out when things don't go their way. And so when you go ahead and discard them, they may
respond in a way you aren't even familiar with. If you have had a strong relationship
with the narcissist, so far, you may not know what it feels like when they are done
showering you with affection or when they don't feel like
they have to perform for you. And this is when they are at their most dangerous. In this sort of situation,
the narcissist is done with the games and is either trying to break you down even more
or trying to manipulate you into going back to them. Either way, you want to be at your most composed
at this initial stage since things can turn ugly in a hurry. Number 9: They will start to deflect. After that initial emotional reaction. The narcissist will most likely begin to withdraw
and become much colder than before. This probably isn't the worst idea
for you to try as well as otherwise. You may catch some serious strays
from this toxic personality. You may start to get blamed for things
that you brought up or manipulated into believing that you overreacted. None of this is true, but it can be hard to not get tricked into believing it at the moment. When a narcissist starts to accuse you of things or is trying to shake themselves
loose of responsibility. It is best for you to stick to the facts
when you talk about your opinions or beliefs. It is easy to argue,
but when you are just stating facts, it can be really hard
for a narcissist to fight against. Number 8: They threaten to hurt themselves. Discarding a narcissist can be difficult
because these people tend to latch on fairly quickly
to their partners and friends. When you bring up boundaries
or threaten to leave, often a narcissist will try to use your own empathy against you,
which can be both jarring and more than a little scary. If you are feeling overwhelmed during this part,
you should try to focus on the things that you can control and try not to become personally
connected to their sob stories. As harsh as it may sound. This tactic is nothing more than a way
for them to regain control, and you shouldn't get too drawn into this act. Number 7: They will claim they've changed. Words don't mean anything to some people,
and the narcissist definitely falls into that category. These people can be tricky with their words. And don't really think that there is anything wrong
with saying anything to get your way since words won't hold them accountable. Your best bet is to either reject them entirely or even to require them to prove
that these aren't just false promises. Almost always, the narcissist will begin squirming away
from this form of accountability, showing their true face once again. Number 6: They may not respect the discard. One of the most unexpected reactions to discard is refusing to honor it,
despite the ridiculousness of it. Narcissists will often try this tactic
if they feel like you are weak enough to fall for it. They will attempt to claw their way
back into your life. All the while claiming that you just weren't
feeling like yourself when you tried to end things the first time. This form of manipulation is dangerous too, since if it worked it would really shift
the balance of power between you two. If you feel like you are struggling
to continue saying no to this individual, it is important that you take some time for yourself. In order to gather your thoughts and recenter yourself. People underestimate
just how much strain gaslighting and outright arguing can have on a person,
so don't feel like you have to do it all in one go. By the way, make sure to subscribe
if you've learned something new today. Number 5: They may play the victim after going through all that you have,
standing up for yourself and speaking out against abuse, you may feel as though
you should be rewarded for your efforts. Most people may even agree with you
and you should definitely be proud. But the narcissist is not going to cut you any breaks. It can be frustrating to hear them play the victim
after all the things you have put up with But if the narcissist
doesn't think they can argue against you, they may very well
try to get you to sympathize with them. It is worth noting
that you do not have to humor this behavior at all, and that this is simply
what happens when you discard a narcissist. Sometimes, once they figure out
that you are not tricked by their fake crying or blaming,
they will probably adjust course soon after anyway. Number 4: Weaponized incompetence. Narcissists are really versatile
and will often pick up tricks that they have seen work for others in a relationship. The term weaponized incompetence refers
to when a person will pretend to not understand something
so that their partner will take care of it for them. Recently, narcissists have begun to pick up on this behavior, and it is possible that they may try it on you
if they feel like you are discarding them. This may result in them pretending
like everything in your relationship is great, or them asking you to break down very simple concepts in order to slow you down and interrupt number three, they will go to others. Narcissists don't ever fight fair,
and they can be real quick to bring in support. When things start to look dicey, if you are going
through a breakup with a particularly toxic person, you should probably let your friends
and maybe even your family know. Since nothing is off limits to a narcissist, the last thing that you want is to discuss the details
of your relationship with your parents. Just because a narcissist started lashing out. So in order to protect both
you and your support system, you should probably give everyone notice
that something is up. Number 2: The home stretch. Near the end of the discard. You may start to feel like
things are finally looking up. The toxic individual in your life is leaving you alone and you are finally able to focus on yourself again. This is usually when the narcissist gets desperate as they start to realize that they are losing you
for good. As manipulative as the narcissist can be,
it is truly hurtful for them to lose you, but not for the reasons
you might expect for these people. Losing you is admitting to themselves
that they weren't good enough for you. And that feeling can be deeply traumatizing for them. They may try reaching out a few more times
in an attempt to get you back, but by now that door is most likely closed shut by you. Number 1: Moving on. Now that you have successfully navigated the first couple of weeks of the narcissist,
the rest is going to be pretty straightforward. Since you have had to deal
with a toxic person for so long. You may find the need to seek out emotional
or mental health services to shake off the rest of it. And that's 100% okay. Dealing with a narcissist
can be a tremendously emotional and difficult time, but you were fortunate enough to deal with it
head on and to get past it. If the narcissist ever presents themselves again,
you will know better than to fall for their attempts at love bombing and other gestures that you used to identify as love. The best part of moving on though, is knowing that
the future is going to be much better than the past and that you will be able to sniff out any narcissist long before they have a chance
to sink their teeth into you.
