(Sci-fi music) (explosion) (sci-fi music) (water gurgling) (sci-fi music) (guns clicking) (sci-fi music) (phone rings) (sci-fi music) (indistinct chatter) (sci-fi music) - Hello one and all, and welcome to a new thrilling season of Dimension 20. I am your humble dungeon
master, Brennan Lee Mulligan, with me, as always in the dome, are our intrepid heroes. Say hi, intrepid heroes. - [All] Hi, intrepid heroes. - That's what I'm talking about, baby. - There it is, there's the juice. - There's the juice. There's what we love. - Finally the juice. Listen, me and the intrepid
heroes we want to say hi, we want to shout out back in the dome. First of all, to all of you, we are, of course, being incredibly safe and COVID compliant. Shout out to face shields and masks and all of our crew being kept safe. Thank you, Ash and the rest
of the production department for keeping us all safe. One may notice a couple
of things different in this season. I want to shout out a couple other people, because it's a new season in
a brand, brand new setting. And you know, we were looking, we were looking all over
the world for new settings to play in. I was like, we gotta find a Sci-Fi setting with the humor and grit
and wit, and wonder to take us and the intrepid
heroes to the stars. So reached out to noted author, Elaine Lee to use her setting of "Starstruck". Elaine Lee the noted
author of "Starstruck", "Vamps", "BrainBanx", many comics, also the author of me,
- Wow. - her son, Brennan Lee Mulligan. Mom, thanks for the galaxy. We will handle it with love and care. - We love you, Elaine! I can't wait to meet you one day. (laughs) And talk about astrology, baby. (laughs) - There you go. My mom famously sent
Ally my birth chart and-- - Yep, got all the juicy deets. (laughs) - What are his weaknesses? - Oh, I can tell you. I'll write it down. - That's the main thing astrology does, is list your weaknesses vulnerabilities to fire and poison. (laughs) Yes, we will be playing in the "Starstruck" universe,
the graphic novel series from writer, Elaine Lee,
and artist, Michael Kaluta. Shout out to Mike Kaluta, my godfather. And a world of hot suns, hot guns. We enter (trills) AnarchEra 220 and they'll- they'll do this. I'm doing with my mouth, but they'll probably add a noise here too. AnarchEra 220 Hecatoncheires
Asteroid Cluster, just outside the Phoebus system, spinning asteroids floating in space as distance stars glitter
on the face of mother void (vocalized explosions) yellow gleaming hyon beams (vocalized lasers) blast across the space as the Red Hot, a massive Amercadian modified retrofitted smuggler freighter races
through the asteroid belt as hyon beams from pursuing Roid Removers, (vocalized laser shots). You guys see a bunch of
clampers zooming in past you. Hyon beams skating across
the shields of your ship. Gang...roll initiative. (exclaims and laughs) - You don't even know who I am. - What? - It's a new season. We're back in the dome, no punches pulled. - I rolled a nat one, baby! - Oh, I also rolled a nat one, no. - One more nat one. (screeches) - You get tickled. (laughs) - Third nat one. - No, no. - Can I roll with disadvantage to try and get a nat one? - Yeah, roll with disadvantage,
you're gonna hit a nat one. - [Murph] Please don't, please don't. - Oh, I rolled better. (laughs) - Left out, dude, left out. All the cool kids are
rolling nat ones these days. - What did we get here, Zac? - I got a 19, I don't
know what the fuck's wrong with everyone else. - Incredible. What did we get here, Ally?
- Three. - [Brennan] A three amazing. - Are you serious, three
nat ones and a three? - These were given to me by Rick Perry. - Yeah, Rick Perry-- - Also rolled the dice
given by Rick Perry. - My Rick Perry gave me a dirty 20, with advantage a dirty 21, but I got disadvantage so just a dirty 20. - [Brennan] Just a dirty 20, incredible. - Wow, here we go. - That's right, for the first
time in Dimension 20 history, we will be leaping straight into combat. It's a tough galaxy out there, but somebody's got to live in it. It might as well be you. Gang, we meet the crew of the Red Hot when things are looking pretty bad. This retrofitted, old,
discontinued Amercadian Space Brigade, mess freighter is crewed by the following individuals. We're going to start, of
course, on the bridge. Where, of course, only
two of our crew members are currently active. Zac and Siobhan could
you please introduce your characters and describe them? - I am Norman "The Skipper" Takamori and I am the captain of this vessel and I am surrounded by morons. (laughs) Seriously, where is everybody? We're being chased by a
bunch of little freaks? (laughs) - That's right, as the
captain is so quick to notice you are being pursued
by a veritable armada of Armstrong Roid Removers. When it's time for you to
remove a pesky asteroid trust Armstrong, the number
one name in asteroid removal. Though, these ones seem
to have been outfitted with Space Saber hyon beams
that are currently blasting your shields away. I should mention you are not
currently at 88 shield points. Could you mark yourself down at a humble 18 shield points remaining? - [Emily] 18, we're down to 18? - [Brennan] You're down to
18 shield points, I'm afraid. - Great. - Brennan, bad baby. - There are more than
18 people following us. - Let's hope that they only do one point of shield damage each. So we see Captain Norman
"The Skipper" Takamori, what does he look like? - He is like half shaved. He has like a little
towel around his neck. He had his like two
minutes of peace and quiet where he didn't have to hear these morons jabbering away at his ears. And then of course we're
getting attacked by a fuckin' armada of drones coming in after us shooting their hyon beams. I'm in hell. (laughs) - Incredible, looking back over the hassled captain's shoulder we see in the center of the bridge an enormous glass sphere of water. And within that water, we see
the ships comms officer, Riva. Siobhan, could you introduce
your character to us? - Hello, I'm Riva the comms
officer slash unpaid intern. Riva's obviously my human name. My actual Aguatunisian name is, and then you get an image
of being deep underwater and finding a current
that leads you swiftly and perfectly to where you need to get to. So that's my real name, but
that's a bit complicated for most non-psychic life forms. So Riva's good for me, I'm
just here having a good time. I'm out on my gallivant. That's a thing that we Aquatunisians do. We go out and we live out in the world before returning back to
our home water planet. "Oh, this is so fun, isn't
it? Oh, it's so fun." - Riva, from your central water
ball on the bridge, you see (vocalized ping) a hailing signal from a nearby
class YNV Anolo Interceptor incoming from a ship
designation The Lady Pike. - Hello, hi how's it going? - You activate the screen
and coming up in front of you and the captain, you see a dull red bridge of a pursuing ship, this
larger, Anolo Interceptor. You see there is a very
old, like deep wrinkles, of almost she's like
maybe like 80 years old. She's got sunglasses on and a kind of like some kind of fangs around
the outset cowboy hat low as she's at the command bridge. You hear, "Oh hey in there, this is Captain Jan de la Vega of The Lady Pike. We're coming in hot on
your tail, friend-o. Noticed you lifted some Borinyum krystal off the cosmic veil
couple of banlons back. So here's the deal, amigo. You hand over the krystal
and we don't bust your ass back and forth to the Byzon Galaxy. How does that fit, partner? - Okay. We'll be right there. We'll hand it right over to you. - Absolutely not. We're not handing over
the krystals, goddammit! Listen to me. Space is pretty big and there are very small borders between
things that are unclear to a lot of people. I don't think we found that
where you say we found it. So we're going to take this krystal and we're going to get out of here. - Oh, he says we're taking the krystal and we going to get out of here. - She can hear me.
- Oh, right. (laughs) (vocalizes lazers) - "Well, I see about 20 Roid Removers. These clampers would love to
get in under those shields and buzzsaw away. So if you want to try to
run, hoss, be my guest, but we're getting them
krystals one way or another. Ain't that right, Needles?" One other com screen opens and
you see a Cranchian gunner. Who's this little lizard guy go, (laughs) "That's right
boss, let's open fire." - Lizard people shooting at me now. (laughs) - Norm, today's a pretty bad day. And we move back through
time to better days, golden fields of wheat swaying
in Kansas on Amercadia. Ranks and ranks of
Amercadian cadets saluting as you, in full dress
uniform, approach the dais. Beckoning you up is
general Analinda Weatherall of the Amercadian Space Brigade. Norm, on this day, as
you're being decorated, what's going through your head this- this many years in the past? - I think Norm is looking
around at just truly the most perfect, beautiful thing he
can imagine, a full military. (laughs) Look at it. Everyone's in
uniform. Everyone is uniform. Everyone is puffing their chests out, being the brave heroes that they should be and Norm is doing everything in his power to live up to the name and puff
his chest out just as hard. - "Cadet Norman Takamori,
please approach the dais. (laughs) - So many corners. (laughs) - As you approach the dais
"for outstanding service and gallantry in the face
of overwhelming odds, for your position as Ace
Tiger pilot of your squadron, we award you the Brass Tiger." And you see pins a medal to your chest (vocalizes gunfire) guns fire off, (cheers) everyone applauds
as you approach the dais. ♪ And through the course of history ♪ ♪ There was but one society ♪ ♪ That stood for might and liberty♪ Hat removed. ♪ The old green, red, and blue ♪ ♪ Amercadia ♪ And you see the banner waving
over Kansas: Amercadia, the Amercadian Space Brigade. Good till the last drops. - Just a little bit of a tear. - We've cut a couple of years later, you're in a dull brown office
with sort of the shades drawn, wispy kind of desert of New
Texas looking out behind you. "I'm sorry, we're not
going to put the squadron under your command." - But I, sorry. Sorry, sir. I am. What, what else is there anything else to do? Are there any other options? - "Well, you know, we discontinued." - The Space Brigade is kind of the best thing there is, right? It's the most, the thing
that I am most proud of and it feels a little like, well, I, I kind of don't understand what you're telling me right now. - "Well, we're saying that
this is where it ends, Norman. We're saying this is where it ends." You see that the officer
here just looks and says, "here's the best we can do. "We can bust you down to corporal and have you ride a desk or
you're discharged with honors. You take half pay on your
pension. It's not a bad deal." - I mean, I guess I could get out there, get that half pension and
try to find my own way. - You see the officer shrugs and goes, "Now you could cash out half your pension, get yourself a ship if you
want to still be a pilot, obviously, you know, you're foregoing a lot of future money." As the officer begins
to say this you look out and see an old mess freighter. It's been discontinued, this line. They don't make this anymore. And you see it's going
to go to surplus sale, but you see a rusty old hot
dog shaped ship out there on the launch pad, outside
the medical offices. "I mean, I don't recommend
cashing out your pension, you know, but because you'd
be cashing it out at half pay. So the life of the pension
is worth way more." - I'm cashing the fuck out. (laughs) I'm going to make my own Space Brigade. (laughs) - "The hell, what are you saying, Norman?" - I'm saying there's
gotta be people out there who can crew up a ship like
that and be just as good. - We cut to the present moment. (laughs) - I can't find any help. (laughs) - Zac, you are first to act in combat. - I am going to use evasive maneuvers, which is before my initiative, right? - Yes, absolutely. You can do this. - And roll a D6 and move
that multiplied by 50 away from these people behind us, right? - Hell yeah, we got to
give a huge shout out here first of all, to TaleSpire,
Rick Perry, Katie Mc. and of course our builders Hanan and Jonny over at TaleSpire, for the incredible work building out this Sci-Fi setting. Thanks for taking us to
the world of "Starstruck". Also to our friends at Hero Forge and Fox for hooking up all these rad minis. And also, as you may notice, we're playing with some wild rules. We'll be playing with SW5E. Shout out to Todd and Teagan, Todd Moonbounce and Teagan Jenkins over at SW5E for hooking us up. Check out Dungeon Jedi
Masters for the scoop on how to play this wild system that we're playing here. - That person's last name Moonbounce? - Todd Moonbounce and Teagan Jenkins. - The most perfect last name I ever heard. (laughs) - Bada boom. Go ahead and roll the dice and we'll see how many feet you move. - Okay, someone's got
to get us out of here and it certainly won't be my crew. He is gonna roll the D6,
five, so five times 50. So I go 250 feet straight away. And that is prior to my turn, I believe. - Yes, it's when you roll initiative. - Okay and I think, I just want to make an investigation check on what, it feels like we got to
get the fuck out of here versus we're fighting these. - Go ahead and give me
your perception, yeah. - Okay, my ship's perception or mine? - You could use yours with disadvantage or you can use the ship's. And the ship's would be a scan check. - 18.
- 18? You are overwhelmed with
these Armstrongs here, with these clampers and
buzzers from the Roid Removers. And you also are looking back, that interceptor behind you is definitely modded out. You can see them arming up
a tractor beam on the front of that interceptor coming after you. - Okay. I'm in hell. (laughs) Yeah. 250 feet away. I think I'm just going to use
the rest of my action to fly straight ahead and use a
bonus action dash away. - [Brennan] Incredible. - We're going as far forward as we can. - Four of these Roid Removers are going to take their reaction at this point. - Oh, god damn it. - They're going to make
four attacks on the ship. They make this as part of a charge. You see (vocalized whizzing)
a couple of these vessels swoop in, three of them, get
under your ship's shields and make contact with the hull. They are not using energy weapons. So they bypass shields here. They are using their like
construction asteroid stuff to just move in and clamp
onto the hull of your ship. Here's where we're at right
now. Those are some low rolls. I am going to need three maneuver checks using the Red Hot stats
from our pilot, The Skipper. - Maneuver checks are
dexterity checks, right? - That is correct. - Which is negative one. - Pull up, Skip, pull up. - I would like to give the direct. - [Brennan] Absolutely. - Action to give you an
advantage on that roll. - Thank God, that was a two
so it would have been a one. That's 11 so 10. - First check succeeds. (cheers) Now this next one is rolled straight. - Okay. 13 which becomes 12. - That is a success. - Natural one. (groans) - That'll happen. - The ship immediately
takes six points of damage to its shields and
reduces your speed by 50. - No.
- I hate to be this guy. Didn't you say it
directly impacts our hull? - It does. Sorry, not your shields. Six, hull points of damage. Thank you very much for keeping me honest. - Lou! Do we have any homework?
Do we have any homework? - It's the first day.
- Okay. - Amazing.
- Just because I had to ask-- - This is PVP starting now.
- Okay. - I attack Lou. (laughs) - Me the person, right? - One of them clamps onto the ship deals a small amount of damage,
but reduces your speed by 50 as it clamps on and like it
does to asteroids all day, hits its thrusters and
starts pulling your ship in the wrong direction. You, it is still your turn. As it uses that reaction, you can go ahead and
take whatever movement you're going to take. You said you were going to
take a fly action, correct? - Yeah, so I initially moved
for the evasive maneuvers and now I'm going to take the fly action and use slippery pilot
to, they're grappling? Can I disengage from them? - If you want to use an action, you can use an action to
make another maneuver check and try to shake that clamper off. - So we only have one clamping onto it. - You only have one clamping on right now. - Yeah, maybe I'll do that. - Give me a maneuver check. - [Murph] That negative one. - Four.
- Oy. - Four is not going to do it. You have movement and a bonus action. - I just want everyone at home to know that Brennan made our fucking ship stats. (laughs) - Yeah, we did not dream this up and we're like, this is what we want. - If we were creating a
ship it would have been so top of the line, you have no idea, absolutely busted ship. - It would have been a cheeseburger. - Yeah.
(laughs) - Full disclosure at character creation everyone was like we're
so excited to play bozos and made the most busted
characters I've ever seen. Unreal, okay. - Okay. So I still have my
movement and the bonus action. - That's correct. - So, I will use full
movement just straight ahead. - Amazing, so we're going
to move 500 feet forward on this vessel. As you come in proximity to that asteroid, give me one dexterity saving throw. (giggles) - 16. - You (vocalizes air whooshing)
try to shake this guy, zoom out of the way of this asteroid, (vocalizes air whooshing) as it begins to zoom past you. - Does anyone work on this ship but me? - Riva, you have used
your action to direct. - I have used my action. - Do you have any bonus
actions you would like to use on your turn or no? - I do not have any bonus actions. I have a reaction that
I'll use if I need to when I need to. - Amazing, Riva as you
sit there, looking at your screaming captain,
calling up these helpful things to grant advantage, where you are able, we (vocalizes bubbles percolating) bubbles move around in
your watery comms station. And we return to Aguatunisia many years ago. You look before you and
see two of your friends and loved ones. One of them is Cool
Water of the Shaded Reef. The other one is Rising Bubbles
from a Deep Volcanic Vent Many Fathoms Below Us. Both of those images
communicated to your mind. They look at you and say, "I'm so excited for your gallivant." - I'm so excited for my gallivant. - You see the other one
sort of crosses their arms and looks at you and goes,
"you know, here on Aguatunisia, we share one mind, one heart, and we hide nothing from each other. And there are no secrets
kept and no one tries to take advantage of anybody." - Exactly. - "And I assume that's what's
going on in the galaxy." - I don't have any other
thoughts about what else it could be.
- Amazing. - We can't be dishonest to
each other that's terrible. - "It's terrible." - It's the worst thing that you can do. (claps) - A couple of years later, you are looking through a pane
of glass through some water and you see Sister
Mildred of the Cosmic Veil who's a member of the Cloistered Order of the Goddess Uncaring looks up and says, "So, you're on your gallivant, right?" - Yes, that's right. - "Oh, that's amazing. What do you know about Pleasure Putty?" - Oh, I don't know anything
about Pleasure Putty. - "In addition to being
a nun, let me talk to you for a second, so I'm actually
a part of this business. It's incredible." - Oh, okay.
(laughs) - "You're your own boss.
You make your own hours." - No!
- "Yes. It's true." - Your own hours? What
do you make them from? - "Wait, oh wait, here's the best part. You don't even have to
make the Pleasure Putty. what you do is this. You make a small
investment and the company sends you Pleasure Putty."
- No! - "And then all you do
is you recruit people to sell the Pleasure Putty
and they make an investment. And basically not only
are you your own boss but you're also the boss
of these other people who are their own boss." - That's amazing. It's like a boss within
a boss within a boss. - "Within a boss, within a boss. It's a quantum state of people
being each other's bosses and also themselves."
- That's beautiful. - "And it forms this perfect structure. The strongest structure in existence is a three dimensional triangle." - Oh. That is strong.
"- Yeah. Really strong." - 'Cause all of the
corners support each other. - "All the corners support each other." - All the corner bosses are supporting the other corner boss. - "Yeah and the corner
bosses all support the boss at the top corner." - Right, but the top corner it is also, if you flip it around a
bottom, that's beautiful. 'Cause they're all the same, aren't they? They're all bosses. - "Yes, and whether it's
the top or the bottom, it's where we send our money." And we cut back. We cut back to you looking down through the water sluice deep,
deep down in the ship. You see many, many
crates of Pleasure Putty, which you had to pay extra
for to get waterproofed that are just waiting for
you in your living quarters. - I'm going to sell some any day. I believe in it because I'm my own boss. (laughs) And I make my own hours
and I don't know what I make them from, but I do
make them from something. (laughs) - From probably the putty. - Oh, you're so clever. - Incredible, as we look at the ship, we are going to zoom away from the bridge to the dual gunning
stations of the vessel. Emily and Murph could you please
introduce your characters? - I'm Big Barry Syx, ruggedly handsome, about 38 years old, six foot four, about 235 wearing some kind of
like skeletal armor over his huge body and is yelling to the other gunner down the hall. - And I am Sundry Sidney,
Jane of all trades, the Swiss Army wife. I am a beta version of a
discontinued multi-purpose droid. And I'm wearing like a
little 1950s diner uniform with little roller skates
and a little paper hat. But then I also have an
assault cannon for an arm and a cybernetic eye. (laughs) - Both of you are getting
communications from the bridge. You can see that one of the Roid Removers is clamped onto the back of the ship. The others are kind of
swarming in behind you and you can see way off in the distance, although partially you
have partial cover from it through the asteroid
field is The Lady Pike. What are both of you
calling out to the captain as you hear Norm cursing? - I'm calling out and I'm saying, "what how far away are we
from that big green ship? The one that looks like a shark." - It does kind of look like a shark. - It looks like a shark. - I think it's like 3,200 feet. - 3,200 feet, so I couldn't even do it with disadvantage. - 3,200 feet you could,
that's exactly the range. - [Zac] Is that right? - If it's 3,200 feet, I could do it. - It is, yeah. - I think I go to Barry and I'm like, "Barry, I can take a real big chance and try and get that shot." - Take the chance. - You think I should take the chance? - Take the shot, take
the shot Sid, you got it. Androids and steroids, we got this! (laughs) - Nuts and bolts, androids and steroids. - Nut and bolts, androids and steroids, we got this, take the shot. - Get off the chain, my ears are bleeding. - We're on the main channel, I'm sorry. - I'm sorry captain.
- Back to gunner channel, back to gunner channel. - Okay, gunner channel. - I'm still on gunner channel, I really like you two chatting. - Hey Riva, how are you?
- Hey, what's up Riv? - Hi. - Then I'm going to, I have weapon expert to give me advantage. But so with disadvantage,
it'll just be straight. - Yeah. So it gives you advantage. This is going to be a
straight shot. Correct? - Okay. - [Barry] Come on Sid, come on. - Okay, heaven's to
motherboard I need this. - Oh.
(giggles) - It's an 11. - Ricocheting off the
asteroids in the mix. The hyon beams of your quad hyon cannon blast off the side of the ship. (vocalizes cannon fire) - Hey, I may be a droid,
but I am programmed with emotions to inhibit some
of my more rash behavior. And so right now I feel
absolute desolation and defeat. Talk me out of it, Barry,
because I'm in a bad place. - You gotta go for it. You got to grab life by the horns, okay. And you did that! Alright? And I love you for it! Alright? Now, I'm going to shoot these fuckers that are real close 'cause
that's an easier shot. - As the Red Hot wheels around to bring Barry's gunning station
into focus on The Lady Pike Sid, having missed, you enter
this deep place of sadness. And we zoom back through time
to the corporate boardroom of Handy Andy Android manufacturers. We zoom in on a screen
and we see Sundry Sidney, gleaming, smile, rollerskates
the candy striper outfit and the gun arm. "Presenting new top of the line from the Handy Andy corporation,
proud purveyors of fine androids all over the galaxy, Sundry Sidney. - How may I please,
pleasure, or protect you? - "Look, I'm a mover and shaker
of a galactic corporation on the go. I need a majordomo and executive assistant who can keep me safe from all the people who are trying to get my number. And with all of the amenities
of the top of the line companion droid, take that Erotica Ann. - Yeah, fuck Erotica Ann. (laughs) I've been programmed to say that. (laughs) - "Sundry Sidney, the
multi-droid for you." (vocalizes a screen blip) Little like the holo projection ends and we see a boardroom. A CEO wearing a kind of purple suit, sort of like holds the thing. He just paused the
commercial with looks around at the boardroom. You see R & D department, other executives and
sort of like, you know, marketing people, ad people,
and Sid you are standing there currently having been given the command to stay still. What's your sort of neutral
posture as you are frozen? - I think I have like the plastered smile of a people pleaser and
like a look in my eyes that's desperate for approval. That's like my natural
state so that people know that their status is above me.
- That doesn't resonate at all.
(laughs) - So you see this boardroom
filled with executives. There's the CEO of Handy Andy here who has just sort of clicked this button to stop the thing. You see him going and looking. "So this aired and you understand that Living Doll has already filed suit. Fuck Erotica Ann? That made it into the commercial? That made it into the commercial? Direct slander, fucked us, fucked to death." Why? Does anyone have an answer?" You see the CEO just kicks the chair over and it looks around and says, "okay, pull it up, pull
up the next slide." And you see, it says, "I want
to read this to all of you. Product testing, number one, 'I found the use of the
Sundry Sidney disconcerting. It's multi-functionality
left me often at a loss for what to do next. I tried to engage the
pleasure droid protocol, but as I became caressed
by the assault cannon, I found myself rapidly
leaving my state of arousal. The roller skates didn't help either.' Help me out to understand." You look over, you see that Max Griivar looks over and points to Dr. Edwina Caster who's sort of an older
R and D technician says, "we did our best to design the Android to specifications provided. The marketing department contacted us, the idea of a Swiss Army wife." And you see Max goes, "there's
a reason Swiss Army Knives are sold in gift shops. They are trash. When you are buying a tool, you don't want the thing
that kind of does it all. Anyone with real McCoy is going to get a Vercadian protector
droid, and an Erotica Ann, and a top of the line, majordomo. They're going to get an
executive assistant droid. Why would someone want to show, we're marketing this to people
who want top of the line and we're saying here's
a fucking grab bag." - Is that a good thing? - "Who left this on?" (laughs) He turns around and says, "I, fucking thing is still on. Look, the important thing is this, okay." Looks at the R and D department and says, "I know you did your best, all right. It's got the the assault
cannon and the eye. Conceptually, this was
wrong from the jump. Can anyone tell me why this
was never going to work?" And you see someone looks around and says "what you said about multi-tools." And you see that there's
another young woman here who raises her hand and says, "Well, there's, isn't there
something, sorry, sir. Isn't there something
sort of appealing about for all of us, all of
us feel like we kind of want to be able to do it all right? And so Sundry Sidney
was sort of the idea of you have, there's something
sort of aspirational about there's this assistant
who's protecting you and is a companion and
can provide hospitality." And you see where the CEO looks and says, "You're fired, you are fired. Get your shit and get out." You see, he looks around and says, "people want to be everything themselves. We're not selling people.
We're selling Androids. What do you want your coffee
guy on the corner to do? Do you want him to be an amazing poet? Do you want to know that he
has a nice garden at home? You want him to make the
best fucking cup of coffee. Melt it down for parts,
start again at zero." Sid, you feel something flick
in your krystal consciousness. All seven channels become
unlocked and you feel that you are no longer rooted to the spot. - Can I look at Dr. Edwina Caster with a slightly confused look? - Mm-hmm, she looks at you
with a slightly confused look. Are you, are you trying to communicate? - I'm like looking for permission. - She looks at you, give
me an insight check. - Okay, ah 13. - She looks at you with her eyes wide and you see a little twinge of a smile. She goes, "oh, everyone in this room, "we are in very real danger." - Okay. I'm going to cock my machine gun, but then shoot out the
window and rollerskate out. (laughs) "This database can interface
but it can also devastate." And then I throw a grenade over my back. (laughs) (vocalizes pings) - Oh, Jesus Christ. (vocalizes an explosion) Amazing, we cut back
to the present moment. Incredible. - What happened? Did that person who got fired unlock you? - We don't know. - Okay Barry, you're right,
I've overcome adversity before I can do this. Here's your shot. - Barry. Line it up, baby. - Put my sunglasses on as
Barry gets into the zone. Am I able to shoot the
one that's hanging on? - [Brennan] Yes, you were
able to target that one, yes. - [Murph] I guess I'll take-- - That one is going to have partial cover 'cause you've only got
like a profile on it as it clamps onto the back of the ship. - All right, then I'm
going to go ahead and take a precision shot, not that any of my shots
aren't precision shots. But I do miss sometimes. Okay, okay, please precision shot
help that roll, okay. 17 hit.
- 17 hits baby - Come on, yes. 12 damage. - You fully deplete the drone's shield and deal two points of hull damage to it. (vocalizes shots) as you blast through. - Nice one, Barr. - Thanks, almost got one. - They have shields. - It's okay, I took a
huge swing and missed. - Please Barry, do your fucking job. - I'm so sorry, Captain
Norman, I really let you down. - No, no, no, it's fine.
He's on the gunner channel. This is for us, Skip. (laughs) - Skipper, god damn it. - Captain Skip. - Barry, you (vocalizes cannon fire) as you're blasting away
at this drone behind you. And we zoom in on the six on your armor and we cut back many years ago. As you emerge, covered with
wires and goo, from a big vat and you see five enormous naked, wet men who all look
completely identical go, "Barry!" - What's up, fellas? - Yeah, dude, come on. - Yeah, Barrys, Barrys. - Yeah, come on, dude. Come on, we gotta go this way. - Dude, I know what way
you're talking about 'cause we're clones. - Yeah, we're clones. - I know what you're thinking of. - You zoom through and
you see that another, (gasps) vat opens. - Dude, another Barry, what's up. - "What's up, dudes?" A group of enormous
muscle bound, wet clones are all born from vats on the same day. And all of you are now in a locker room. You've been toweled off. (laughs) - Lot of snapping, I'm assuming. (vocalizes a snap) - All right, enough horse
play, enough horse play. You see there's one of you who shares the same general facial structure as you, but is a little bit
smaller, a little bit older. And you see he's got a little lab coat on with a little stencil zero one. And he looks around at 11
of you again, one day old, beautiful big boys. (laughs) And he says, "My beloved Barrys. I am you and I am me and I am all of us. - That's right, Barry. - "That's right, Barry." "That's right, Barry." "That's right, Barry." (laughs) My name is, as you all know, Barry. - Barry, my name's Barry. - "It is Barry." "Oh, my name's Barry." "Doctor Barry Bohunk, and this the Barry Battalion." - Yes!
- "Yes!" (laughs) "You may well ask why you are all here. And I think, you know why you're here. We are approaching the
200th cycle of AnarchEra following the downfall of the
Incorporated Elysian Republic and the demise of the dread
dictator in ages past. We have seen now a free galaxy. And what is the reward for a free galaxy? The encroachment of sectarian, corporate, paramilitary, and religious crypto sectarian, shenaniganerie. - We hate shenanigans. - "We hate shenanigans,
no more shenanigans." "So in a lawless galaxy, what
happens to the little guy when UFTP or John Q Brigade comes marching through, what happens to the little guy? - He gets fucked, sir. - "He gets fucked. And who unfucks the little guy? - Barry!
- "Barry" - Barry! - We just smash cut
through a bunch of frames of you guys in like huge
Space Marine assault armor, like smashing through plate glass windows, grabbing a child from a burning orphanage, smashing out another plate glass window, just various like A-Team style, like, a small monastery of Teoman Monks is in danger of having
their monastery bulldozed by Crown and Scepter and
only the Barry Battalion can save them. And you see a glorious
series of adventures through the galaxy. Just sort of your memory
slows as you remember a fateful day, you wake up in
the morning and see Barry One, Dr. Barry walk in say
"Important mission today, Barry Battalion, hope all
you Barrys are ready." - Barrys are always ready, Barry One. - "Barrys are always ready." "Barrys are always ready." And you see he says, "Because
you've been working hard. I know it, supersoldier or not." - Playing hard too, sir. - "And that's what today
is all about because your mission is Dr. Barry
is taking all of you to Uncle Bob's Fantanimaland. - Yes, yes, yes! - Big hugs, the Barrys
grabbing each other, lifting each other up. "Yes, we're going, we doing it." - Everyone starts wrestling. - Everyone's wrestling,
big, big wrestling. And you go to Uncle Bob's Fantanimaland, which is a wild theme park
in the Griivar Worlds. You see this enormous, everyone's
like big ice cream cones walking through this
Fantanimaland together. And suddenly it starts, you're underneath a big awning at the central gazebo of wonder. (vocalizes laser fire) They hyon beams start. And Barry Syx, you come
back with an arm full of freezy pops and ice
cream cones for everyone and see a floor littered with 10 other Barrys. And you see a door closing
and a blood covered Barry Nine looks at you, "Barry". - The fuck did you do, Barry? - "I did what you would do." (click) Power cell at empty. He, out of ammo, hits the button (vocalizes an explosion) and blasts off of the surface and Barry Nine vanishes into space. - Barrys! Barry! Barrys! Barry! - Back to present. (vocalizes cannon fire) - It's like a Pokemon that
can only say it's name. (laughs) - [Brennan] Amazing, we cut to
the reactor core of the ship. And who do we find there? - You find Gunthrial
Miggles-Rashbax, aka Gunnie. I'm 4'11", early thirties, a beautiful black, bald head,
and a gorgeous cyborg body. A full cyborg from the neck down, just currently absolutely like busy with, plugging things in, trying
to get power wherever it needs to go, checking in on- "Did you guys say
something about a shark?" - Yeah, I think the ship that's chasing us looks like a shark. - Okay, it's just a ship
that looks like a shark. - Just a ship that looks like a shark. Not a space shark! - 'Cause if we
were dealing with a space shark that would be a big problem. - If I had time to analyze
it, I could confirm if it was space shark. - It's not a shark, it's a
ship with paint on its mouth. - So, just to confirm, we
are all on the gunner channel right now, we do have a main channel. - Well, I was talking on the main channel and no one was here. - Oh, are we supposed
to, Skip, are we supposed to be on multiple channels? - It's Skipper. - Gunnie, I'm glad you're
on the gunner channel, and actually it's quite
appropriate given your name. I wanted to make sure that
I sent down Handy Annie down there with you. - Yes, Handy Annie is
here and being very handy. - We see a sort of cybernetics,
a little mechanical hand, Handy Annie is here helping out. - It's also an allusion to a long, long, I mean, if this takes place in the future a long lost podcast. (laughs) - Hell yes. There you
go, exactly. Amazing. So Gunnie you are in the
reactor chamber here. You see the vast majority
of the ship's power is going all over the ship
many to like amid decks. You see one like double J emblem on one, another one's saying ME written over a crossed out escape pods bracket. Gunnie, what are you doing
on your turn in combat? - I want to check in with the Skipper. The Skipper, are we talking
on the gunner channel or are we talking on the main channel? - You don't have to call me "The Skipper." It's just Skipper, but--
- It's just "Big Skip." - Okay.
- Or "Captain Skip." - What is your question? - Are we fighting or are we running? - I'm trying to get the fuck out of here. - Great.
- I would appreciate any help at all. - Oh, his real name is Norman. Skipper is actually a nickname. - Got it. Alright, Norman The Skipper. Ah, I'm gonna, I'm going
to boost the engines. So I'll use the ship's strength. - Go ahead and give me
a boost engines roll. - I'm still gonna try to
hit that shark next turn. - "And look into some light-" What is it called? - Oh, faster than light. - Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah. - Oh, do you want to jump? - I want to get the fuck out of here. - Okay. So do I need to start
making Astro Nav checks? - You look and see the NavCom hooked up to the tachyon drive. That's your faster than light engine. - It's that bad? - Skipper looks in the
equivalent of a rear view mirror and sees a million little robots and a giant green ship. "Yes, it is that bad." - "Well, okay" I'd like to begin the process
of getting us ready to jump. - SQ comes on. "Hello, Gunnie. SQ here. Would you like to engage the NavCom's AI? - Yes. Please, SQ. (vocalizes beeps and crackles) - "Would you like to
engage the NavComs AI?" - Yes, please. (vocalizes power down) - The NavCom craps out
like it always does. - Great, so there's no, we're not jumping? - You absolutely can jump, but you're gonna have to
do everything manually. - Sick, Gunnie grabs the
nearest piece of paper, a pen and starts charting. - I hear a scribbling
on the gunner channel. - Furious as well. - We do actually have a
separate scribbling channel if you want to go over to that one. - Okay great, I'm going
to flip to scribble. Oh, I'm doing this by hand. Give me a second. - Handy Annie is wearing
a calculator watch. - Oh, good to know. Handy, 3.14172 times 2.71. - So, you start calling
out equations, 3.12. We see Gunnie here calling out equations 'cause the ship's computer is so outdated that it's easier for
you to do it yourself. 3.1 and we fade back in time to a non-cyborg, a fully organic non-mechanical
Gunthrie Miggles-Rashbax writing equations out longhand with chalk on a blackboard at the bottom of a very well appointed
university auditorium. You are a TA here in this room. You see professor Dora
Valentine seated at a desk gazing at you admiringly. What do you thinks going
on as Gunnie sort of clocks into these Astro navigation equations? - I think Gunnie's bored. I mean, it's like, I think this is like pretty rote for him. This is doing what I do most days. I don't know, nothing about this is particularly challenging or hard. - Professor Valentine looks
up and speaks to the class and says "what Mr.
Miggles-Rashbax's showing all of you is, of course, the equation
used most commonly in the conversion of plutonium energy into a ship's tachyon
drive, which facilitates faster than light travel. But of course, any fan of
pop music would be able to tell you all about tachyons." And you see this in a very
polite little bit of laughter at this like professor joke. You see, she goes "well, Mr. Miggles-Rashbax thank
you so much for your time. Class next week we will,
of course, be completing our assignments on the
folding of space time, quantum entanglement, and
as it pertains specifically to space travel. Gunthrie, can I speak
to you for a moment?" - Yeah, of course. - See the class begins
to let out and she says, "I would be remiss if I did
not say first and foremost, that what you did was extraordinary, which is incredible for someone
as emotionally checked out as I know you are." - I'm not, no, it's not. It's I'm not checked out. I just, you know, it's getting old this whole school thing. I don't know. You ever thought about
getting out of here? - Getting to where? Teach
at another university? - No, no, no, no like I'm writing the equation for conversions in a tachyon drive. Have you ever actually flown
in a ship with a tachyon drive? - Well, sure. They're pretty common on
a lot of ships, I think. I don't know for certain. Well no, the ferry I take
to work that doesn't have a tachyon--
- No, no, not on. Out there, in space. - I've never wondered, but I know this, real mathematics, mathematics that matters always comes from the heart. There is no numerology study of meaning quantitative value asset that is greater than the feeling of doing what you are passionate about and I believe that fully and truly. I think if you feel a
calling to something, that's something you have
to seriously meditate on. - I'm going to do it. - Those words echo in your
ear as you look through a massive plate glass wall bay window, overlooking the shimmering white sands of the desert planet of Mirage. And there's a fancy little
soiree happening here. You come from an extremely
well-to-do family. Your father, Professor Erwin Rashbax, is published bestseller many times over and your other father, Dr. Jeffrey Miggles works here at the university as well. And he's a full research professor, he doesn't even have to
teach classes anymore. He's just here working
in theoretical physics and xenobiology, like a true
savant in two different, extremely wildly disparate
fields of science. You see Jeffrey looking
out, sort of holding court and saying like, "and of course,
he's sort of fast tracked. We think he's going to
probably lock down PhD number three any day now. Gunthrie, please, please come
here and meet some people." - Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. - You see, it says, "this
is my son, Gunthrie, we should say academic superstar." - For now. - "What do you mean for now? For always." - Well, not forever, but maybe something, maybe a break, like, you know, in a couple like, you know,
soon and then maybe coming back. - "Oh, sabbatical. "Yes, well of course
you're not going to be in academia forever. He is also going to write a book one day." - Okay, well, I mean, you
know, I might take a gap year, do some travel. - Yes exactly, a gap year
for some sort of journey. - I'm going to space, dad. - You're not going to space.
- I am. - You are not going to space. - I'm going to space. - We cut to you in a dingy
office and you see a guy who literally he's like
bristle brush mustache, weird, dirty hat. He's saying, "Now, you wanna go to space?" - You need to see my resume? - Nope.
- Okay. I've got, I've got two degrees. - Yeah, what we need is a navigator. - I can do that, easy. - Listen, I'm sure you heard of me. It's Captain Dan Scrap
of the "Bad Call". Okay. (laughs) Now, I'm not going to lie to you. We've had navigators before. You don't, you're not on Kublacaine right? - What? - You're not. Well you gotta piss in a cup if you want to work on the ship. - I'm not on Kublacaine, no. - You sure you don't have any warrant? - What? Oh?
- Any warrant, any warrant out?
- No, no. I, once I did get a, a
good telling to once, but no, nothing, nothing serious. We were swimming where
we shouldn't have been. (laughs) - So you know, you've never been arrested? - Never not one, not once in my life. - What the hell, kid? What the hell? Well, we got ourselves
a real greenhorn here. So, let me ask you a question here. Let's say you wanted to hyper jump drive from tachyon drive to, (snores) sorry. I'm a little drunk.
- Okay. That's space. - That's space, you want to
get a taste of space, huh? Sign here.
- Okay. - And he says, "oh, we offer, by the way, "we offer, the Spacer
Guild has an insurance. They, but they take a
percentage of whatever you make on the, on the trips. So they're going to carve out
probably 10% of your haul. Better you do a flat rate after the trip to pass clearance. And then, they don't get a percentage because if you strike it
big on a haul like this, then you don't want the
insurance company to come in and carve out. So what we recommend
you do is fly uninsured and then you come in afterwards
and you pay the flat rate after the trip.
- Great. So knowing, that's what-
spacers don't do insurance? We're not doing that? My dads would probably
be, they like are always, they always like anytime we fly, it's like they get insurance, they get insurance on the insurance. Well we, but spacers we're like, nah? - Well, it's up to you, right? You're the egg head kid, so why don't you run the math for me. It's a one in a million
that something bad happens. And it's a 100% chance
that the insurance company takes 10% of your haul. - I mean, well, I'm a true spacer. So no thank you insurance. (vocalizes explosion) - Your intestines are floating in space. - [Ally] Whoa. (yells) - Your ship is in tatters. You see Dan Scrap is completely uninjured looking out and he says,
"oh, I forgot to mention you want to get a zero grav suit." You see that he puts
a bowl over your head, which is giving you oxygen. But open void is freezing your digits and pulling at your skin. You see your intestines
just floating into space and hardening into ice as the wet of your own blood
freezes in the cold of space. You see a little ambulance
craft and there's (exhales) a person floats up to you
and holds something out in front of you. You see a space paramedic
floats up with a data screen in front of you and you hear you, "Are you insured?" - No. - Okay, we need you to sign here and here, - How? - There is out-of-pocket costs. Can you move your arm?
- No. - Use your tongue. (laughs) - Gunthrie has a very elaborate signature. (groans) - You are in full traction in
a hospital in a hospital room. And you are sitting in the hospital room with Captain Dan Scrap and also-- - It's really nice of you to come, Dan. - "You know, I feel bad about
everything that happened." There's a representive from
Acme-Ashmun here saying "The cybernetic organ
transplant, the blood processors, kidney replacement, limb replacement, leg replacement and keeping
the original organic feet, but giving the feet, the
cybernetic casing to interface them with the completely cybernetic legs, the replacement for your eye, all of that is going to come in at a total of 600,000 galactic credits. - Dan, we're going to
go on a lot of missions and we'll make a lotta...? - Well, I hate to tell you this, but I actually have to let you go. - What? - If we keep you on the crew, then we got to pay worker's comp. - Yeah, yeah that makes sense. - I also, if we let the
ship's insurance cover it, I get two points on my license and I can't get any more
points on my license. - No, I get that. I get that. - But, you're a good
egg, you're a good egg. - Thanks, Dan. - "Welcome to the spacin' life, buddy." We cut back to the present moment. - 27.144. - As you breathe harder,
the credit starts going up. You are charged per breath
because of your synthetic lungs. And as you breathe faster and faster. (vocalizes beeps) - Deep breathes, deeper
not shallow, deeper. (inhales and exhales slowly) 2.1 4 1 6 1 (inhales and exhales slowly) 6 1 7 4 3 4 1 1 7 (inhales
and exhales slowly). - A little message comes
up in the reactor core. A new, more dangerous
repayment organization has bought one of your medical loans due to your defunct or lapsed
payments on this account. But you continue charging forward. Let's go ahead and make
these Astro navigation checks and also a boost for the engines. Let's do the engine boost first. - The engine boost first. Great. That's going to be the
space. That's the ship's. - Plus three on the Red Hot for boost. - That's an eight plus three
equals 11. That will not do it. - Boost is plus three for the skills for the Red Hot, correct?
- Yes. But I got an eight. - You are one shy of boosting engines. You start to pull them off. (vocalizes beeps) - Come on, come on. Yeah. - Dear Mr. Miggles-Rashbax,
your loans have been in repayment, lapsed
credit, your monthly minimum 16,500 credits. Your pristine cyborg body,
which is top of the line, Acme-Ashmun, the best they make, and which costs you a fortune, you rent your ability
to live from the company you bought this from. Let's make those Astro Navigation checks to get you out of hot water. - Great. How many can I make? - You are going to make one
because the ship's computer, you can use the ship's
computer, but it's quite bad. - No. - We're going to go pen and paper. You're making this at disadvantage canceled with Handy Annie, this is a straight
- I got you. - mechanics kit check,
so it's proficiency. - Plus seven.
- Plus seven to the roll? - That's a 10. - Your calculations are
adequate resulting in one completed equation. It requires 10 completed equations to jump to faster than light travel.
- All right, all right. (vocalizes beeps) - These three Roid Removers
are going to double move to get in striking
distance of the Red Hot. The one who's already got you clamped is going to make another attack, that's a natural 20. That is a bad roll for it to
have rolled double damage on. - Oh right, I'm on ship HP. - 12, 22, 25 points of hull damage, bypassing shields. Up above Captain Takamori, you see, a buzzsaw cleave through the outer hull. You hear airlocks go off. You see popping his head
in, in a little sweater vest is Raymond Zam, who is the office manager for the Jib-Job coworking space that you rent out in the
lower decks of the Red Hot, which is probably one of
your best monetary sources. "Hi, ah, Skipper, sorry, pal. We're having a graphic
design quarterly downstairs and we noticed the ship, so
there's like a loud noise." - There's a loud noise, yeah. We're being attacked right now. - Could we just push
that back by 90 minutes? - I'll see what I can do. - Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Listen, it's just we only have, we only have these quarterly, so it's just once every three nargons, and it's kind of a lot of work. - Right, right. - "Yeah. Gosh, thank you so much. I appreciate it." You see Raymond heads off. - He just like drop kicks a chair as soon as he's gone. (laughs) - That wasn't truthful at all
what you just said to him. And he just believed it. - Listen, just go swim in
circles or whatever you do. - Okay.
(laughs) - This squadron over here
are all going to take 800 feet of movement. They're gonna move and move again, 800. These five over here are
going to move just 400 and then open fire with lasers on the ship.
- Are we dead? (laughs) - Yeah, I'm going to
say we're actually down to 27 hit points on the ship. - Out of how many?
- On the hull? - We still have a shield. - 27 hull points and 18 shield points. So, let's make 'em, let's
stretch them as far as we can. (dice rattle) - Oh my God, only one hits. - Whew.
- Thank god. - Astounding, (laughs). (groans) - This game is stressful. (laughs) - Shields take 11 points of damage from one of the lasers. - All right team, down to... down to seven hit points on our shields. - [Brennan] And The Lady
Pike is going to move. - She's too far away. I think
she's just like watching TV. - Yeah, they're probably
it's just a bad signal on the antenna for the TV. - Yeah, they're just
moving for better signal. - Somebody sends somebody out to move the rabbit ears around.
- Exactly. - She's watching like a game show, like celebrities dip themselves in paint. And an audience has to
decide which celebrity's under the paint. (laughs) - [Brennan] Amazing. - That's a future I want to see. (laughs) - I am going to need a
strength saving throw from the Red Hot. - Chill.
(laughs) - Very chill.
- Chill, sick, chill. - So, I'm going to add half
my dexterity modifier to this. - Minimum of one. So one, all right. - So, strength saving throw.
It will be plus six I think. - [Brennan] For the Red Hot? - It's plus five so I added-- - [Brennan] Yeah, now
it's plus six correct. (dice clatter) - 24. - Skipper you hit the turbo thrusters and just avoid getting target locked by the tractor beam on The Lady Pike. You've avoided the tractor beam here. I'm going to need you to
make an opposed check. Roll your scan. You're
trying to beat a nine. They rolled low. - Watch out. - Oh wait, I do have it. - Okay. - I have 11. - 11, they go to jam your comms. Riva you yell "watch out." Keep the comms from getting jammed. (vocalizes ship's thrusters) De la Vega comes back on. "Well, I don't know why you're being such a horse's ass about this Takamori. - Takamori just truly
doesn't know what else to do. (laughs) - Says like, "why do you
want to walk outta here with half a ship when you
could have a whole ship?" - He's honestly thinking about this. (laughs) - Keep the bun not the hot dog (laughs) if you have to choose.
(laughs) - And we cut deep into the ship to a funky little apartment
in the back of the ship. Margaret Encino, Ally, could you describe your character for us? - Absolutely, completely
separate from anything you've seen so far this episode, my name is Margaret Encino. I'm a 24 year old
entrepreneurial business woman and I work for UFTP, the
United Free Trade Planets. I'm an executive, I'm
actually very high functioning and today has been a mad house, okay. I had a revisions walkthrough
for the Morocain Project followed by a virtual round table with the Troikani partners board. I paused for 20 minutes and
checked my cell phone in. Okay, a little thing I like to do, 20 cell phone free
minutes where I then had a full body tea tree and matcha massage. And then of course
followed by my corner boss by cycle check-in. So yeah, I'm just kind
of like in the groove I'm answering phones, I'm just working from home, WFH. - WFH working from home. Hell yeah. It's very humbly appointed here. Like a lot of executives
that are very young. You basically for 850 credits a month, you rent this space on the Red Hot, which a lot of junior executives do because being on a ship
actually has advantages over being like trapped
on a planet somewhere. - It's also like kind of fun. Like these people are artists. (laughs) (vocalizes laser shots) "Oh my gosh, what is going on up there?" - Yeah, you actually
do, in your apartment, up above hear like (vocalizes buzzing) and you like look at your little porthole and see like a buzzsaw moving
into the ship behind you. - "Okay. That's not good. Oh, I have so much on my plate right now." Can I walk up and just
try to help really quick? - [Brennan] Yeah, for sure. - I'm going to throw my hand
in and I have a disruption that I can cast like from the ship. So I'll just do hack
communications as an action. I'm going to expend a power die and choose any number of ships that
I can see within 600 feet. So I think that would
just be all of these guys. They have to succeed
a wisdom saving throw, or they take ionic damage equal
to the number that I rolled plus our charisma modifier. And on a failed save all
of their communications are disabled until they reboot. - Wow.
- Amazing. - And then I'm going to get back to work. - And then I'm going to
get truly back to work. So first of all, in
order for you to do this you have to hack into the ship's systems. So a little com, this is
the thing that you like little comms open up. You see Margaret show up on screen basically to like ask permission. - It says, "Margaret
(she/her)" like a Zoom call. (laughs) - You see Margaret show up
on your comms screen here. - Hi Margaret. - Hi. Good morning. It's me, Margaret Encino.
- Good morning. - I'm noticing that
we're having a little bit of a disruption? - Yeah, there's a little bit
of a thing going on right now. Can I help you with anything,
do you need like hot water or something?
- No, no, no. I have all the matcha I need. Thank you. I'm just going to use a power die and I will be hacking
communications within 600 feet. Is that okay? - That is awesome, that is great. - Fantastic, you know,
before I went to school, I was studying to be an operator. So this is like. - Yeah, if you want like a job, like an actual job here, let me know. - Oh no, I'm absolutely
loaded with a maxed out 401k. I think I'll stick with what I'm doing, but it's so great to talk to you. (laughs) - Incredible, so within 600 feet of you oh my fucking god. (laughs) It's literally all of them
that are close to you. - The one competent person on the ship. - Someone's on hold right now. I'm like, "Hey, I'm so sorry. I'll be right with you in just
a second and I apologize." (vocalizes electricity crackling) - This EMP goes off. What you actually do is you go through the ship's like transmitter. You recognize these are
Armstrong Roid Removers, UFTP owns Armstrong.
- Incredible. - So you're just going to go
into your corporate database and like, this is effectively
you sending an email to someone to like remote
disable as many of these as possible.
(laughs) - Hey, I'm going to need
these model numbers shut down. - Incredible, go ahead and
roll a power die and add one. So roll one d6 and add one. (laughs) - That's a four. It
looks like to everyone. - [Brennan] Oh, pulling an Ally, we're back in the dome, baby. - I just, my hands get so sweaty. I'm having so much fun. - All of those droids take
four points of damage. As you watch all of
them start the sequence of getting shutdown remotely. It will take some time for all of them to get fully shut down in that way. Coming up on your screen as
you're doing that one handed you see with like sort
of metallic green make up sort of smiling at you,
hologram is Lucienne Rex, who is your sort of peer in a different department at UFTP. "How's it going, Marge?"
- Lucy! - Hey, Margie, how are
you doing, sweetheart? Are we excited for this four o'clock? - Yeah, definitely. I'm completely ready. How about you? - Completely ready. - I figured, right. - "Yeah, I figured, too. Good to see you." You see that she looks
over at you and says, "By the way, I just want it to holler about a couple things 'cause I know that we're going to be on with
them in like 30 seconds, but the Monarch of Rubien V contacted me, apparently they found out
that the moon they live on is made of pure lithium. Do we want to pay him off or
do we just want to call in some, you know, troopers and
take care of it that way? - Ew, I hate that. Wait, so they found out
that they live on lithium? - UFTP owns a tremendous
number of planets. on a planet that you guys technically own there is a monarch of that
planet who is actually you are several like notches
in the leadership above. So you could fire this
monarch if you wanted to, but they are claiming that
they want to have a rebellion because they've found out their moon is fully made of lithium. - Which is good. - Which is good. They basically found out that
they're getting a bad deal, that you guys are
excoriating their home world for the lithium it's made out of. - Okay. Okay. Then I go back to Lucienne, "You know what, let me handle this. We'll do something that will..." - "I mean, it's pretty simple. We can just sort of scrub
the problem if you want to." - "Yeah interesting. You already have so much
blood on your hands. I'm sure you'd love to do that." And while I'm talking,
I'm like filling out, like essentially this world's like Reddit and I'm like leaking
all of this information and trying to like start the rebellion. (laughs) - So there are like a number of like, kind of subreddits of like. - Incredible, so you're trying
to start the rebellion there. - Like that's so interesting. Yeah. We should definitely
take care of that. (vocalizes beeps) - "Conference call beginning."
- Great. - As you merge in this conference call you and Lucy go in and Lucy says, "Margie, your big heart is
going to get you in trouble." And you cut back through years of like business school, academic, like getting your first job out of business school, clawing through like corporation after
corporation after corporation. Your parents like kind of
becoming strangers to you over the years, just constantly
wind surfing somewhere. You don't know where.
- They love each other so much.
(laughs) - You have this memory
of years, years prior, you and Lucienne walking out
of business school together. She looks at you and
just sort of goes like, "Well, you have the degrees. UFTP, right?" - Yeah. - I'm glad to be doing it with you. - Same. I couldn't do
it if I was by myself. I mean, just. - Listen before we're like in the shit do you wanna make a promise to each other? - Yes. - It's a fucking grind
out there and you and me, we don't come from any of
the big families out there. We're not so-and-so Medea.
We're not so-and-so Griivar. Let's just keep each other's
backs the whole time, okay. - "That's so funny that
you say that because I got you this" and I pull out, I have like a matching
necklaces that have like, kind of like a little gear cog on them. - She takes it and goes, "Oh my God." - It's kind of tongue in cheek, but yeah, this is just to remind
us we're more than that. - "Hey, it's like that
leadership summit, right, What is it? The platinum cog?
- My god, - [Both] The Platinum
Cog Leadership Summit. - Whoa yeah. - "Hey, we might be cogs. We're platinum baby." (laughs) And you zoom back into
this conference call and you see your direct
supervisor, Damien Factor, looking out and saying, "All
right, it looks like we got all departments on the call here. Hello, Lucienne. Hello, Marge. Hello to all of you. Great, great, great. Marge maybe a little
noise, like a giant saw and some hyon beams firing from you. - "Oh, that's so great." I turn on like a filter
that I've like made. - Amazing.
- So sorry. - Get like a background so
the space battle isn't there. (laughs) - Amazing, "and by the way,
a little bit of personal news up top personal and professional, we have some congratulations
that are in order. We want to say congratulations
to our own Lucienne Rex for number one, her engagement" and you see a little round of applause. And she goes, "thank you, thank you." "And her promotion to
the Open Executive Suite for Crown and Scepter." (applauds) And you see Lucienne
directs her eyes down, does not look up at the
camera on her holo recorder. - I immediately, like go on the internet to find out who the fuck she's engaged to. - Oh, none other than Natalia Cicero Connie Lee Carter Bajar. - The owner of-- - The the original family of
the original dread dictator of the Incorporated Elysian Republic, who later took all of
their imperial earnings and founded Crown and Scepter, which is the parent company
of United Free Trade Planets. - "Oh, cool promotion." If there's like a message capability, that's like private message.
- Yeah. - I just Slack her "Cool promotion." (laughs) - You see, there is a ellipsis of typing in that message then nothing. - I think to myself, "coward,"
and then I mute everything, but I'm still on it. - You're still on the call. They start talking and you
see Lucienne very quickly takes over the call and she starts going, "So obviously I'm going
to be going into sort of a more managerial position
during these meetings. Thanks to Damien who now we're
going to kind of be splitting what used to be Damien's sole job, but it's a very exciting
time for all of us here. And my goal is to see a younger, hipper, I want to see a United Free Trade Planets with, you know, kind of a
more now modern attitude. You know, like, yes, we want
to acquire as many planets as we can and own them. How do we do that in a
way that is consistent with our mission and consistent
with our corporate values?" - I'm taking notes, and my note
only says young, hip people don't have to say they're young and hip. (laughs) - We are going to (vocalizes
air whooshing) move forward. All of the ships have gone. And now we are going to return into the initiative order back at the top. And we can take this turn all together. Can I get a reading of
how many shield points and how many hull points? - Seven shield points and 27 hull points. "Captain Norman, permission
to shoot the shark again?" - Do anything, please. (laughs) - Amazing.
- Yes. Looking at this we have one
attached to us currently. - I actually think I could do something about the one that's
attached to us, Captain. - "Okay, cool." I think the captain is looking at this and he's like quietly wondering to himself like could I trade my crew for my freedom? (laughs) - Riva, you fully
telepathically hear that. - And then I go, wait. I mean, la la la la la. (laughs) - Just on the gunner channel the captain is thinking about
swapping us for his freedom. - Devastating. That means
I've failed in my directive. - You all failed, anyways. - We haven't failed yet. We're
still alive, technically. - Okay, well I think it makes sense probably to disengage and
then take the full rest of my movement forward. - Do you have a thing
that you wanna try to do for the one that's-- - Yes, for the one that is attached I would like to probe the
mind of the pilot within, but doesn't have a saving throw for the just upper level thoughts. - Amazing. - And I would like to
very quickly understand how to work the buttons
and stuff in front of him. And then I would like to Quicken
power, psychic push pull, to just press as many buttons
that are just to get it off of us and away. - Oh my God, go ahead and
spend the psychic points necessary to do that. That is so god damn cool. Give me a, I will say
give me an insight check with advantage to read
the surface thoughts of how to manipulate the device on there. - Can we just agree that
I'm on a conference call where they're talking
about like, let's be cool and I have muted it and I'm
only listening to this channel. - Yes, absolutely. Absolutely, yes, yes, yes. - Okay cool because I want to be a part of this much more.
- Absolutely. - I got a 26 insight. - Incredible, you psychically reach out from inside this water bulb. You scan the mind of the person
and just psychically, boom, throw the push, pull with
your space casting venture, which allows you to cast
at that double range. The one Roid Remover clamped onto you unlocks its clamp. You are free. However, there are four on you that will get opportunity attacks unless you disengage. - Okay. I think that means
makes sense to disengage and then take as a bonus action and then take my movement away. - I think unless we can take them all out, but it was pretty tough,
just shooting the one. - Yeah, I starting to wonder if I should kind of pivot and do something else. - We could rapid shot and take a chance. - Also Margaret, are you on the channel? - Hey guys. - Welcome to gunner channel. - Do you need another matcha,
I'm kind of engaged right now. - Oh yeah, no problem. No thanks. - Hey Margaret, say
congratulations to your friend. - Oh yeah. I'll definitely
pass that along. Thanks, Riva.
- You're so welcome. - Amazing. Let's get that boost engines. - Okay, cool. Whoop, what do I add to that? - The ship's strength,
which is plus three. - Oh cool, 14. - 14 engines are boosted. You gain 50 feet of speed. So now the speed I believe is 350. - Before we move, is it important for me to try to get that shark? Are we concerned about the shark catching up with us or are we just trying to put everything into
getting out of here? - Can I make a insight? - Yeah, give me an insight check and you have that pilot thing
so roll with advantage, yeah. (dice clatter) - Not great. Can I do perception? - [Brennan] Yeah. - Okay, so that would be 16. - 16, and what are certain
information are you looking for? - I'm just wondering
if it makes more sense to just hightail it out of here. - At this point, with your
points as low as they are there is no surviving
this in a straight fight. - Yeah.
- Yeah. - What are you rolling to do? What are you rolling on your ask? What, what type of check
is it, intelligence? - Yeah, I will. I'm using my mechanics
kit and my brain. Yes. - Okay, then can I, does
it make sense for me, instead of even doing anything with guns, to just cast enhanced
droid through Handy Annie onto him so that he
rolls all with advantage. - Handy Annie, already
grants advantage on this, but if are you doing more than one thing or what are you doing. - So I can make the Astro
Nav check, I believe. - As a bonus action, yes.
- As a bonus action. So I could use my main action
to either patch the shields or, you know, work on getting
some of the shielding back or I can do something about
some of this hull damage. - I think, yeah, any
sort of damage reduction. - Great, in that case,
I'll use Handy Annie for the Astro Nav boost check and then I'm going to do
a patch check as well. - Cool.
- For the ship. - Give me the straight mechanics kit roll for trying to get these equations. - Come on. That's a dirty 20. - A dirty 20. You get two more completed
equations, three out of 10. And by the way, if anyone has other rolls or things they want to add to that you are absolutely welcome to do so. - I mean, I think, I think
there's nothing for us to do, but to just keep gunning these guys. - All right, we're just
going to gun the ones that are close, I guess. - Hell yeah. And give me that if
you're doing shield regen or if you're doing a hull repair. - I'm gonna do hull repair.
- Cool. - We're gonna go ahead and
make constitution check with the ship. That's a plus three. Oh God darn it. That's just a six, which
means that I have disadvantage on this hull roll so I roll two D6. - Two d8 and take the worst of the two. - Great. How about two eights? Okay, an eight and a four. So we get four points back. - You rush through, into the reactor room. Start to repair one of
the burst pipes from, from this buzzsaw damage. Start patching the ship
up some four hull points. That's your ship's last hull point. - Hull die?
- Hull die, yeah. Go ahead and give me your gunning. - All right, I'm just gonna-- - First for me. - I'll shoot first, I can
try and give you distraction. Okay, so I'm going to
shoot a real flashy gun at whoever is closest to us. So just whichever droid is closest to us, but not the one that he softened up. - [Brennan] Okay. - And I'm going to do, oh crit baby. (cheers) - Not the one he softened up, correct? - Not the one he softened up. - [Brennan] Cool, cool,
cool, brand new one. - But, I'm doing distracting die so that he can have advantage on his next. - So we are using a power die. - We are down to two. - And I am going to use my
kinetic die to empower it. Does that mean that I
get to add that twice? - Yes, you get to use that twice. - Woo. - By the way, I forget your ship does still have shields. Your ship regenerated four
points of shields automatically. Four points used automatically. It also got a power die back. - Yeah, down to two, back up to three. - [Brennan] Cool. - Now down to two again. - She's rolling good. - Whew.
- Woo! - One at a time. - Hey.
- One at a time, gotta savor each one.
- Yeah. - 21 plus 3, 24 points of damage. (vocalizes gunfire) - 24 Points of damage. (vocalizes an explosion) One of the drones bursts
apart, it's metal-- - I knew I was good at what I do. - That's right, Sid. That's right. - Barry, I think I caused a distraction and you can have advantage on your roll. - I'll take the one that I
already hit and didn't kill. - Oh, actually it was one more. Okay, just one more, 25.
- Cool. - Sweet, so I will shoot with advantage. Yeah. That's like a 25 to hit. - 25 definitely hits. - Sweet, and this is just a regular shot unless you guys think,
should I use power dice? Do we have a power dice?
Should we go for it? - I just used a power dice. - Yeah. We're down to two. We got it. - All right, hang on. I
might use one after this. I'm going to take a chance on this one. Please roll okay. Seven, 10 damage. - 10 Damage to the one you hit. Okay. It's still up. - No.
- Power dice? - Hit it. - All right, precision
shot, please, please. One. - It's still up.
- What? - How much damage, I've
done like 27 damage. - Did it work? - This thing is hanging on by the barest. - I think if I bonus
action, I'm a barbarian. so I would get two. - It blows up. (cheers) That's what you needed. You crossed the finish line in a rage. It all adds up baby. Now here's
the question for the pilot. There's now only two left on your tail with opportunity attacks. Do you still want to take the disengage? - Norman is like looking into
like the black void of space, like at his own reflection and just seeing the like 50 year old version of himself, like disassociating. - You just hear Riva's
voice inside your head. "Believe in yourself,
Captain, believe in yourself. - Get out of my head. (laughs) - I didn't want you talking about. - You're talking constantly. - I'm not, I'm not lying. I'm lying, it's me. - I wish I had my guys. - I'm trying it out, I'm trying it out. - "I just wish I had my guys." He, yeah, it's just picturing himself with his Space Brigade. Just like, even though people
are doing good around him, it's overall an
overwhelmingly bad situation. Fuck it. I think he will do it without
the, I think the dash. - Oh, do it without the dash. - I mean, do the dash
instead of the disengage. - No disengage, we're
going to take the risk. So it's dash, move, and fly. We're taking three actions here. Now, hold on a second 'cause this is, because now all you're doing is gunning it and I believe you boosted
engines this turn, right? - Yeah.
- Mm-hmm, - So this is going to
be 1050 feet of movement unless they clamp you. So I think this is Box of Doom worthy. - Oh my god.
- Oh. - Get the Box of Doom out here. - Big roll, big roll.
- First episode Box of Doom. Okay, oh this is opposed. So here's the two numbers you need to beat with a maneuvering check. It's two eighteens, two 23s. - In what world? - We, I think, does that mean we have to roll a nat or is that? - What's your maneuvering? What's your bonus to maneuvering? - Negative one. (laughs) - We're going to need two nat 20s. - Fully dissociating looking
into the black of space. - I'm done. - It's a 10 and a 14. - Oh, watch out on that 14. - [Ally] Yeah, yeah maybe. - So, minus one. Oh no, because it wouldn't, it wouldn't be a crit then
still it would just be 20. - [Brennan] Correct. - Not worth it. - That doesn't mean we can't run though. That just means that there
stealing speed from us. - Stealing speed, so
instead of moving 1,050 each of them takes away 50 speed. - Wait, but what about
my hacked communications? Would that have, they're
the closest wouldn't that have affected them, wouldn't they roll with disadvantage? - Oh, let me see here. Hold on a second. Hold on one second. Something very wild and
cool is about to happen. - Margaret, you're very efficient. - You're very efficient, Margaret. You rolled a 10 and a 14, right? That's what you rolled.
- That is correct. So that would become
sadly a nine and a 13. - A nine and a 13, okay. - [Riva] A literal wiener - Have we consider our stats are terrible. - I'm going to use
also, can I use defiant? - Yeah. You can add. - And add a D4 to one of them? - Yeah, so do you want to add
to the nine or add to the 13? - The 13 I think, - Let's get the 13 higher, let's do it. Yeah. Go for it. (dice rattle) - Three.
- Cool. - It's now a 16. So a 16 and a nine. - Can I use defiant on
one of the other ones? - Yeah, absolutely. - I have defiant also.
- Yeah, absolutely. - Four, so that's a 13 and a 16. - So a 13 and a 16. - Or a 20 and a 9. - I wonder, yeah, I mean,
can you add them both to the same thing?
- Oh, maybe not. Okay 13 and a 16. - So hacked communications
does damage to them, but it doesn't give them
disadvantage on anything. - Okay. Yeah. I just thought if their
communication is disabled and it's someone operating like a-- - Maybe yeah, you know what? I will rule that that
can be disadvantaged. Is there any other actions
before we calculate this fly on this round? Anyone else doing any deployment stuff? - [Murph] I already shot. - Everyone's already done your stuff. Okay. You have a 16 and a 13. - And they have how much to theirs, plus? - They have plus five.
- Okay. - Do you want me to roll
against the 16 or the 13 first? - Do the 13.
- 13 first. - So we need a seven or lower. That's a seven. - We need it, that's good.
- That's good, good. - Yes.
- Okay, okay. - One misses.
- Okay, now we have the 16. - Now you have the 16, on a 10
or lower this misses as well. - Manifesting one.
- That's a 19. - No.
(groans) - Now there's one there. - We got rid of one. - Amazing, so speed's still 300. You take three move actions. The Red Hot has one clamped on, but moves 900 feet forward through space. - Cool. - 900 feet is exactly what
you needed for these drones to not be able to double move and get within striking distance again. Okay. The Red Hot surges
forward through space. You have all gone. The four drones, two of them
have hacked communications. Yeah. They're actually gonna
do attacks with disadvantage. That's a miss. This crew back here is going
to double move forward. These ones here are going to
double move forward as well. The ship takes 11 points of damage from laser cannons, firing down. All those drones are going
to start moving it forward, except for the two that had
their communications hacked. They fired one miraculously
managed to hit. The Lady Pike is going
to double move forward. I am going to need another
strength saving throw for the tractor beam. - Okay. (dramatic music) That is a seven.
- Watch out. - Go ahead and add the power die. - Come on three, 10. - 10 does not do it. (groans) - Let's move. You are
hit by the tractor beam. Let's immediately move the
Red Hot a hundred feet back. - No.
(groans) - Which does bring you once again within striking distance of those droids, you are also going to get fired on. - By The Lady Pike? - By The Lady Pike.
- Oh. - Everyone please take
moment to be grateful for the shields that we
had before they leave. - Gunnie, go ahead and
give me a technology check. - That's going to be a 25. - You see incoming heat signature of some Magneto Boy Light-Seeking Torpedoes. - This is bad. - Maybe we can shoot them
out, maybe we can shoot 'em before they get to us.
- Are they slow? - I don't think, I don't
think they're slow. - Are they like coming now.
- Oh no. - These are the guys that come
down and they come down fast. Grab onto something.
- Why even tell us about it? - Seat belts on, can
somebody tell the people at the workspace to grab
onto a desk or something. - We're going to roll an attack roll here. I don't want to overdo it, but this is going to be Box of Doom. (groans) - It feels like every
roll has been Box of Doom this entire (laughs). - Plus five to hit, which
means they hit your armor class on a three or higher.
- It's okay, it's a one. - It's a one.
- It's going to be a one. - [Gunnie] Barrel roll the hot dog. - That's a five. (groans) - Skipper is just like looking
at the map of the ship. Like looking at where the escape pods are. - They don't work, right? - No, I don't think, I
think one of my apartment, my apartment is an escape pod, right? - I think we only have one
and it's your apartment. - [Brennan] The ship
takes 31 points of damage. - [Emily] Hull or shields? - To shields and then goes past them - So 31?
- 31 all told. - How many?
- 20 total. - Should I? Do we have
a power die left or no? - No, we are out. - Oh, yeah, we do. I can make one with my superiority die. - Is that worth it? I have this, like, I can like take a D6
away with a snap roll. - I think anything, any hit
points are going to help us because I think, yeah. - All right. If we can do that, yeah. - Cool, amazing. Go for it. - Three points, reduced.
- Okay so 23. - And shields are at zero?
- Shields are at zero. - You guys lose shields. Shield systems down, will
not regenerate anymore. You are naked metal in space. - All right.
- We're so fucked, it's episode one. - It's a tough galaxy, baby. - Riva.
- Yes? - You're in people. You're
in people's heads, right? - Sure, absolutely.
- Okay. I think Barry has a thought
to himself, just like, I wonder if like Riva's magic works where like, if you can see
like somebody on a screen, if like you could fuck them up. - No, it doesn't work like that. (laughs) - Can I pop out of my office and be like, "Hey, so are we being chased like for any particular reason?" - We've got crates.
- We have stuff. - Can we just dump the
crates and then maybe they'll leave us alone? - I'm personally inclined
to keep them because that's how we make money. And money is how we make grenades. - "For sure," I hear every
alarm on the entire system going off all at once. I do wonder if maybe--
- What if, what if we dropped most of the crates? - "What if this? I know,"
is it our turn yet? - It's your guys' turn. Your enemies have gone, crew
acts together on the ship. - Can I do a hologram that looks like we're dropping the shapes. - What is the maximum size
of hologram you can create? - Just got these, so--
- You regained one power die at the start of the turn. You do not regain shields. Shields are down and will
require a true refitting to replace your broken shields. - It is a 15 foot cube. - The crates are, you could
probably do one crate. - It just looks like we're shitting out one little pebble. - [Gunnie] How many crates do we have? - How many crates do we have? - You probably have about like 15 or so. - Keep the one?
- Let's just keep-- - One of them is a hologram? - Yeah. - We push out all of them
and one is a hologram. - It's a believable trick. No? How much is one crate worth? - I'm down for this. - It's worth a try. - How much is the one crate worth? - If these are full of Borinyum krystals this was a huge haul because each of them was 3K credits. You'd still have 3000 credits. - I can help find you guys
like work or something maybe. That's kind of the whole thing-- - Let's get rid of the crates god damn it. - All right, but keep the one. - Let's keep the one.
- We can keep the one. - That's a win. - We're doing one hologram
in order to keep one crate. - Skipper, you got this.
- Shit. - Skipper, the crew believes
in this absolutely 100%. - Assume you're going
to voice or video chat. (vocalizes beeps) - "How we feeling, Takamori? - I'm feeling fine we're
going to get rid of our 15 crates, or 14 crates. - No, way lower. - I better see 15 crates
shitting out of that bird or I'll boot your ass
to Byzon and back buddy. You better believe it. - Listen, what can I do to get out of this, myself? - Roll over, Fido. - That's not his name. He has two names. It's Norman and it's Skipper.
Or Captain, that's three. - Listen, you don't
have the chops, Takamori so why don't you just open your craw and let me scoop them little krystals out? (laughs) - I think Takamori would open it to let them-- - Jettison.
- I think he's giving up, he's just fucking giving up. - You're going to go ahead and jettison the crates.
- You're not even going to keep one crate, Skipper? - Skipper, that's all of it. - You gave him the brainstorm. - Captain Norman, my entire
directive is to please people well right now you have
severely displeased me. (laughs) - Do you want to, with this hologram plan, do you want to try to hold onto one crate or do you want to jettison all 15? - Sure, let's just keep
the one crate or whatever. - Cool, you guys hold onto
one crate of Borinyum krystal and jettison 14 crates and a hologram. You all see, "This is
captain Jan de la Vega of The Lady Pike saying it's
a pleasure doing business. Rough stars out there. Sorry for you luckless,
abandoned, and forsaked." Lady Pike comes in, scoops up the crates and the one hologram. You see that the Roid Removers turn around and follow The Lady Pike. And your shieldless, smoking
(vocalizes crackling) and with no hull dice
remaining, we exit combat. - Well, that could have gone worse. - I honestly thought we had 'em. - I did too, I think it was cowardly to give up all those crates. I do. I do. I know that I'm not supposed
to speak up against people, but there's other people right now. There's other people who want to do this. So I'm trying to please them. - You guys are so communicating over, you see that Raymond Zam
pokes his head in and says, "hi, we're supposed to
get an alert whenever the bay doors open 'cause
we were in the middle of a quarterly graphics meeting. You know, we only have them
once every three Nargons. And basically, you know, we had an emergency air lock
and just was like a loud noise in the middle of a presentation. So, you know, we do it's because
it's 10 credits per person, you know, to rent that space." - We'll just want to figure it out. - "Just a heads up in the future. Yeah." - "Great." He's just gone. (laughs) - We'll figure it out or whatever. - [Skipper] We'll figure
it out or whatever. - Should would go take a
look at the one crate we got? - Look at the one crate? - [Gunnie] Yeah, check the haul. - Look at the crate?
- Yeah, absolutely. - "Can I say something real fast." And this is pure,
obviously pure deflection on the part of the captain. "This is the most worthless crew I have ever had in my entire life. Not one of you know how
to do your job right. And that makes my job impossible." (sobs) "Yeah. Cry." - Tears join the water in Riva's bubble of a slightly different
consistency, refracting light. - Hey man, you're a coward. - I'd cry if it wasn't expensive. (laughs) They charge me for excess hydration, but that, that was mean. - I'll collect your hydration. Let it go. - No, it's fine.
- Let it go. - It's fine.
- I'll suck it up. - You don't have to suck it up. I can't put it back in,
that's not how it works. But oh, okay, yeah, I'm a coward. - I don't know what's going on over here, but we got to hit our shots. - I did actually hit one shot really well. I don't know if you saw
it exploded really big. And then it made it--
- Hey, you're a clone. I don't listen to you.
- What? - Right on, right on.
- Okay. (laughs) Whenever we get back
to where we need to go to fix this ship, I'm cleaning house. You're fine.
- Cool. - Thank you for your, you know, - We shake hands like really strong. (laughs) - Do you go to inspect the final- - Yeah, let's look at the crate. Let's do one last job. - You kind of took the fun out of it. - You know what--
- Maybe you could hold back and the three of us could go
- Maybe I'm not a fun guy. - Look at it. - You head down to the hold. Riva, you swim out of your bulb, a pane opens up so you can look out through the water system. Gunnie, you're walking through the ship, seeing all the areas
that are air locked off damaged for the hull. An incredible amount
of damage has occurred. Both gunners, come down here. - I stopped my wheels so that
I can skateboard over some of the damage or I mean
rollerskate over some of the, or walk over rather than-- - You can't roll over some of the damage. - [Sid] Oh my this damaged terrain. - You pop the crate expecting
stacks of Borinyum krystals. Some sort of parasite
clearly got into the crate. - Great. - And you see a lot of rotted sacks of imitation, powdered egg substitute. (applauds) - I love imitation
powdered egg substitute. - Isn't that fun, right? - Maybe we could sell
- What else could go wrong today?
- the parasite? "- Oh, look there were krystals in here. Oh, it's like egg sacks and shit. What else is in here?" And
it starts digging through it. (laughs) "What else, what could go wrong?" - As you dig through
some of the devoured bags that some parasite got in all of you watch and see a flash of green goo
fly into the Captain's face and shoot up his nose. That's all for this
episode of Dimension 20, "A Starstruck Odyssey". Tune in next week. See you in this stars. - See you in the stars. - Wow.
- Wow. - [Sid] He smushed his
face against the glass. - Why don't we do like a light mutiny. - Captain Norman, no one
tried to pickpocket you while you were unconscious. - This is where the ball
is rolling up the hill. - What do you want me to say? - I want you to apologize. - What is the Pleasure Putty?
- What is the Pleasure Putty? - Oh, I'm so glad that you asked. I have a, somewhat of a rudimentary grasp of human anatomy. - I look at Margaret so haunted. - I'm kind of doing a little dance. - Things are great today.
(laughs)
The first episode of A Starstruck Odyssey is now up on YouTube, for free, for everyone who (like me) doesn't have Dropout at the moment :)