We Tackle the Cats V Dogs Debate

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GUILLERMO, HOW ARE YOU DOING, HOW ARE YOU FEELING, TELL US EVERYTHING, ARE YOU MORE IN LOVE THAN YOU EVER IMAGINED? >> WOW, YEAH, SPEECHLESS, JUST, YOU KNOW, SHE IS THE GREATEST THING. JUST THE SWEETEST, MOST CRYINGEST-- NO, NOT AT ALL. SHE IS A REALLY EASY BABY, HAVE I COME TO KNOW. >> >> James: THAT'S SO GREAT. >> I LOVE HER SO MUCH. >> James: WE'RE SO HAPPY FOR YOU, WE REALLY, REALLY ARE, WE ARE SO HAPPY FOR ALL THREE OF YOU. >> THANK YOU. >> James: IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL ALTHOUGH I KNOW YOU ARE SITTING RIGHT OVER THERE AND YOU ARE HERE RIHT NOW BUT I AM ACTUALLY GOING TO SEND A SPECIAL MESSAGE TO YOU WHEN THE SHOW AIRS, OKAY. HI GUILLERMO, IT'S TWELVE-THIRTY-SEVEN IN THE MORNING AND YOU'RE UP WATCHING THIS SHOW, FOR THE FIRST TIME, BECAUSE YOUR NEW DAUGHTER WON'T STOP CRYING, HANG IN THERE BUDDY, LOVE YOU. YOU CAN WATCH THAT TONIGHT. >> THANK YOU. >> MY IN-LAWS WILL TELL ME ABOUT IT. >> James: THAT'S RIGHT, THEY DO, DON'T THEY. THAT IS WHERE YOU FIND OUT IF YOU ARE ON THE SHOW OR NOT. FROM YOUR INLAWS. HOW GREAT IS IT TO HAVE GE AIR MOW BACK ON THE DRUMSK BAND T IS JUST SENSATIONAL. >> Reggie: GROOVY, ALWAYS GROOVY. >> James: ABSOLUTELY SENSATIONAL. TIM, ARE YOU WEARING-- WHAT ARE YOU-- I. >> I DON'T KNOW, IT WAS JUST ON MY DOOR WHEN I GOT HERE. >> James: STAND UP, LET'S SEE IT. >> DOORROBE. >> James: THAT WAS HANGING ON YOUR DOOR WHEN YOU GOT THERE AND YOU NEVER THOUGHT TO QUESTION WHETHER YOU SHOULD WEAR IT LOOK, I LIKE IT. >> YEAH, I PEAN I LIKE IT TOO. >> James: IT'S GREAT, AN WHEN THE SHOW IS FINISHED, HANG AROUND AND FIX ANYTHING TAT NIEDS FIXED AROUND THE BUILDING. ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY FINE. LOOK AT THAT. NEWBORN BABY, WE ARE SO HAPPY FOR YOU, G, WE REALLY ARE, IT IS GORGEOUS AND GLORIOUS. I WONDER WHO IS THE NEXT PERSON ON THE "LATE, LATE SHOW" STAFF WHO IS GOING TO HAVE A BABY, WHAT DO YOU THINK. >> DIANA ANY MINUTE. >> James. >> CHRISTINA. >> James: NOT PEOPLE WHO WE KNOW ARE ALREADY PREGNANT. CHRISTINA IS ON MA TERNITY LEAVE, JOANNA NEXT WEEK. I'M TALKING WHO HERE-- YOU THINK, REG. >> YEAH, ROB. >> James: I THOUGHT WERE YOU SAYING YOU. >> I NOMINATE ROB CRABBE FOR NEXT CHILD. >> James: YOU THINK ROB, YOU RECKON. >> BE A BIG SURPRISE TO MY WIFE AT THIS POINT. >> James: WE DIDN'T SAY YOU WERE WANTING TO HAVE A CHILD-- WE NEVER SAID IT WAS GOING TO BE SARAHS. >> GOOD POINT, GOOD POINT. >> James: YOU KNOW, I THINK WHO IT COULD BE? YEP. TIM'S UP, BABY. >> YOU KNOW WHO IS IT IS GOING TO BE. >> James: WHO IS IT GOING TO BE. >> PATTI LUPONE ABOUT EIGHT AND A HALF MONTHS FROM NOW. >> James: YES, I THINK ARE YOU RIGHT, I THINK YOU ARE RIGHT, DAIFER? DAVE? >> THERE IS A FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING. (LAUGHTER). >> James: CARRY ON THE BROADWAY LEGACY. WELL, SHE'S HERE TONIGHT. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. >> James: WELL, IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN. THE NATION HAS BEEN WAITING. IT'S TIME FOR THE NEWS. THE WHITE HOUSE HELD A VIRTUAL SUMMIT TODAY, WITH PRESIDENT BIDEN MEETING WITH C.E.O.s FROM THE AUTO, TECH, BIO-TECH, AND CONSUMER ELECTRONICS INDUSTRIES. THE MEETING GOT OFF TO A ROUGH START. BIDEN COULDN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO TURN OFF HIS POTATO FILTER, THE SUMMIT WAS CALLED TO DISCUSS A SEVERE SHORTAGE OF SEMICONDUCTORS. THANK GOD THAT RENOWNED TECH EXPERT JOE BIDEN WAS ABLE TO STEP IN. HE WAS LIKE, OK, FELLAS. IS THERE A WAY WE COULD REPLACE THE COMPUTER CHIPS WITH SOME SORT OF PULLEY SYSTEM? BUT IT'S TRUE, THERE'S CURRENTLY A HUGE SHORTAGE OF SEMICONDUCTOR CHIPS -- THAT ALL STARTED WHEN PEOPLE BOUGHT TONS OF LAPTOPS AND OTHER ELECTRONICS TO USE AT HOME DURING THE SHUTDOWN. NOW, WHERE I'M FROM WE ACTUALLY CALL THEM SEMICONDUCTOR CRISPS. THE SHORTAGE IS ESPECIALLY BAD FOR AUTO MANUFACTURERS, WHO HAVE LOST BILLIONS OF DOLLARS AND HAVE HAD TO SHUT DOWN FACTORIES. THEY USE SEMICONDUCTORS FOR ESSENTIAL FEATURES LIKE THAT BLUETOOTH CAPABILITY IN YOUR CAR, THAT SO RARELY WORKS. YOUR BLUETOOTH WORK IN YOUR CAR, OF COURSE IT DOES, YOUR CAR IS AMAZING. >> YOU KNOW, EVEN PORSCHE CAN'T GET YOUR STUFF TOGETHER. IT IS LIKE, IT IS NOT CONNECTED. LET ME TURN IT OFF, LET ME TURN IT ON, IT IS NOT CONNECTED. >> James: THE PHRASE YOU CAN HEAR ME NOW STRKS THE STUPIDEST PHRASE WE AS A SOCIETY HAVE ADOPTED. BECAUSE YOU JUST DON'T NEED THE WORD "NOW." YOU CAN HEAR ME? YOU CAN HEAR ME NOW? WHAT ABOUT NOW? CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? >> CAN YOU HEAR ME FIVE MINUTES AGO, YOU CAN HEAR ME FIVE MINUTES AGO, WHAT ABOUT NOW. >> James: WHAT ABOUT NOW, CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW, CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? >> HOLD ON, LET ME GET OUT OF THIS ELEVATOR, 16 STORIES UNDER THE GROUND AND CALL YOU BACK. >> James: DO YOU EVER GET IN THE ELEVATOR HERE, MID PHONE CALL AND YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHEN IT IS GOING TO CUT OUT? >> YES. >> James: SO I ALWAYS TRY TO TALK JUST BEFORE THAT BIT AND GI YEAH, GO ON. AND YOU JUST MISS, YOU MISS ABOUT FIVE SECONDS OF THE CONVERSATION. AND IT'S FINE. >> Reggie: YEAH. >> THAT IS HOW YOU ENDED UP DOING CATS, RIGHT. >> James: IN THAT MOMENT, IN THAT MOMENT. ALL I HEARD WAS JUDI DENCH, IAN McKELLAN, AND WHAT I MISSED WAS YOU ARE GOING TO BE DRESSED LIKE A CAT. ARE YOU GOING TO BE DRESSED LIKE A CAT. YOU ARE GOING TO DANCE AROUND LOOKING LIKE A-- AND IDRIS ELBA, TAYLOR SWIFT, AND I'M LIKE YEAH, I'M IN, I'LL DO IT DAMN THAT ELEVATOR. >> OH MAN. AND DID YOU GUYS SEE THIS? IN HONOR OF NATIONAL PET DAY YESTERDAY, FIRST LADY JILL BIDEN TWEETED THIS IN HONOR OF THE BIDENS' GERMAN SHEPHERDS, CHAMP AND MAJOR. SHE SAID, LOVE THESE TWO. IT MAKES SENSE TO TWEET SOMETHING LIKE THIS -- AS WE ALL KNOW, DOGS COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND SOCIAL MEDIA. AND THIS IS NICE, ALSO IN HONOR OF NATIONAL PET DAY, JILL BIDEN GAVE MAJOR HIS FAVORITE FOOD, A POUND OF HUMAN FLESH. IAN, I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF YOU HAD SOME DOG TRAINING EXPERIENCE. WHAT'S THE KEY TO WHIPPING MAJOR INTO SHAPE? WITHIN I HAVE ACTUALLY ALWAYS BEEN A CAT PERSON. AND WHAT I FOUND WORKS WITH THEM IS NOTHING. >> James: YEAH. I ALWAYS TAKE A CAT OVER A DOG. EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK. >> ALL THE TIME, YEAH. >> James: CUZ I LIKE AN ANIMAL THAT COMES INTO YOUR HOUSE, CHECKS IT OUT, GOES YEAH, THIS IS NICE. GOING TO NEED MY OWN DOOR. I LIKE IT I'M HAPPY TO BE HERE, I WILL NEED MY OWN DOOR. AND THEN, AND THEN I WILL NEED A LITTLE TRAY, SOME PEBBLES IN, THAT IS WHERE I WILL TAKE A [BLEEP], AND THEN, AND THE FOOD WILL BE NEXT TO THAT GRATE, OKAY. DOGS, FOLLOW YOU AROUND ALL DAY. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW? DO YOU WANT TO GO OUT? YOU CAN COME WITH ME. HANG ON TO ME IF WE'RE OUT THERE, OKAY. I WILL LET YOU KNOW IF I WANT TO JUST HAVE A RUN BUT I LIKE IT WHEN YOU TUG. AND IF I GO OUT WITH YOU. >> IF YOU SAY THROW A TENNIS BALL A DOG WILL PRETEND TO GET IT, IF YOU THROW A TENNIS BALL WITH A CAT, IT WILL CUT YOUR-- . >> James: YOU ARE RIGHT, IF YOU DO IT WITH A CAT THEY WILL JUST GO SHALL-- I'M IN. JUST GO SHALL-- I'M IN. AND DID YOU SEE, THIS THE UNIVERSITY OF KENTUCKY SENT OUT A BUNCH OF ACCEPTANCE EMAILS TO INCOMING FRESHING MRN THE OTHER DAY. THE ONLY PROBLEM, BEING THE EMAILS WERE SENT OUT BUSINESS MISTAKE TO 500,000 STUDENTS THINK PLAIMED IT ON A DPEUTER. SOME STUDENTS WHO WERE ACCEPTED SAY THEY NEVER APPLIED TO THE PROGRAM, VISITED OR EVEN WENT ON ITS WEBSITE, WHICH IS CRAZY, THE ONLY SCHOOL WHERE YOU ARE ALLOWED TO GET IN AFTER DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING IS USC. IMAGINE NEVER A PLIING TO THE UNIVERSITY OF KENTUCKY, GETTING ACCEPTED AND THEN EVEN WORSE, GETTING REJECTED. BASICALLY YOU ARE WALKING DOWN THE STREET AND SOMEONE COMES UP TO YOU AND GOES I WILL NOT MARRY YOU. THIS FALL I WOULD LIKE ME AND YOU GO BACK TO FALL, WE GET A DORM ROOM TOGETHER, WHAT DO YOU THINK, YOU INTO THAT. >> ABSOLUTELY, YEAH, I'VE GOT ALL THE HOODIES, BASKETBALL SHORT COMBOS STILL SAVED IN A BOX SOMEWHERE. >> James: YEAH. SHOULD WE DO THAT. >> I WOULD LOVE TO DO THAT, YEAH. >> James: WHAT SHOULD WE STUDY. >> COMMUNICATIONS. >> James: EXACTLY. NOONE KNOWS WHAT THAT IS. >> NOTHING. >> 100 PERCENT. >> James: WE JUST SHOW UP, COMMUNICATE, GONE. >> AND THEN STRAIGHT TO THE CFETERIA. >> James: DONE. OR YOU KNOW WHAT WE COULD DO, RELIGIOUS STUDIES, NO RIGHT OR WRONG, NO WRITE RIGHT OR WRONG, JUST THAT IS WHAT YOU BELIEVE AND I BELIEVE DIFFERENTLY. >> WHEN JONAH GOT SWALLOWED BY THE WHALE, I THINK WHAT THEY WERE SAYING WAS THE WHALE WAS THE INTERNET-- INTERNET. >> James: AND WILL YOU GO I DISAGREE. I DISAGREE. FINE, DOESN'T MATTER. >> THE INTERNET WASN'T AROUND BACK THEN, GOD KNEW ABOUT IT. >> James: WASN'T T HOW DO YOU KNOW. >> GOD HAD THE INTERNET. YOU PAUSE, I'M OVER MY-- HERE, I DON'T-- . >> James: I HAVE NEVER HEARD THAT, I NEVER HEARD THE PHRASE I'M OVER MY SHEEZ HERE. AND AND FINALLY, TODAY WAS NATIONAL GRILLED CHEESE DAY. AND TO CELEBRATE, KRAFT GAVE AWAY INCENSE THAT SMELLS LIKE YOU GUESSED IT, GRILLED CHEESE. SO IF I UNDERSTAND THIS CORRECTLY, IT'S THE SAME EFFECT AS COOKING A BUNCH OF GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES, WITHOUT THE PART WHERE YOU GET TO EAT A BUNCH OF GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICHES? GRILLED CHEESE INCENSE. AND IF YOU'RE EXCITED ABOUT THIS IT WILL GO GREAT WITH YOUR TACO IS BAE THROW PILLOW, YOU BASIC BITCH. KRAFT IS CALLING THIS THE GRILLED CHEESE-CENSE, BECAUSE MY WIFE LEFT ME, I HAVE NOTHING, AND AM NOW LIVING IN MY PARENTS' BASEMENT FOR A WHILE UNTIL THINGS START TO MAKE A LITTLE MORE-CENSE WAS A BIT TOO LONG.
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Channel: The Late Late Show with James Corden
Views: 279,129
Rating: undefined out of 5
Keywords: The Late Late Show, Late Late Show, James Corden, Corden, late night, late night show, comedy, comedian, celebrity, celeb, celebrities, CBS, joke, jokes, funny, funny videos, funny video, humor, hollywood, famous
Id: abKxf1FijPg
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 11min 46sec (706 seconds)
Published: Tue Apr 13 2021
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