UNHhhh Live at RuPaul's DragCon 2017

[Applause] please help me welcome Katya and trick [Applause] [Music] [Applause] all right everybody everybody sit down we have a lot to talk about I want to talk to you guys about Squarespace I wasn't updating my Squarespace on my Bold and bran sheets at my Casper mattress waiting for my audiobook from audible.com my delivery from blue apron on my squatty potty you got every single one of them but what is this technology did we travel through a wormhole and it's this 1984 this show is sponsored by a karaoke version calm and Speak & Spell so give it up for them thank you guys welcome to our show welcome to our world welcome to the lives of two ordinary female women yeah you guys up for the second year in a row this appears to be the most well attended panel so clap for yourselves the attendance is so huge and overwhelming that they've decided to cancel all other panels and drag car in itself so after this let's just go to Denny's yeah and you guys there's a fashion panel right now where they're actually corseted and look good look at your priorities where are they Oh everybody does look good [ __ ] that's oh everybody hit the clap for the drag queens here whoo gotten dragged this everybody everybody oh my god [Applause] I thought violets testicle the left one that's that's the problems you get on drag racing you get semi rich and then you're expected to spend money but I fear me you go to Amazon and look for swimsuit cover-ups but but you buy like a lot of them wait a minute that is the beautiful fashionable moment you're featuring can you show the boots please oh my Joanne era oh my god please delivering the stage Joanne era straight people handle it every time if gay people did the sound here we don't have like bejeweled Dolly Parton my lady microphone a pretty mic please don't over the stage Britta microphone brittany joanne elizabeth microphone no wait we have an agenda not just political also sexual but before we get into that I want to just say stop bringing me candy that was done on the agenda but if you do bring me candy I will throw it at you I will throw it at your face and I will yell at you so stop bringing me candy stop bringing us candy listen I'm trying to be on Fitness journey and I want one time on YouTube we talked about dirt cake domi dirt cake say get a week it would be funny if your three-bedroom apartment was all floored with Turkey oh I'm bored I'm boarding my flight on Delta Delta and I'm oh i'm carrying four yes these are my carry ons it's for dirt pies yes i threw away all my clothes so i could bring home so wait Trixie i have a question for you yeah what's up um are you a country singer superstar by chance oh yes I am wow that is very sweet you guys it's very sweet of you and for you guys today I figured out finally how to run the music video at my booth god what a riveting music video it is it's a riveting music video and um you guys it comes out Tuesday thank you for plugging that for me and I'd like to plug her album oh listen she's a real musician [Applause] it's a concept album she's Elissa she's a real musician she recently received a royalty check for read you wrote you so she's a real musician I am a legitimate female songwriter I have crafted a hit from my soul and it was a labor of love and it's paid off very well financially and I'm just very happy oh if you searched me on iTunes it says Trixie Mattel and here's my two endeavors one is this self is this heartfelt folk album the other is Geronimo featuring Trixie Mattel and RuPaul are you featured on that yeah RuPaul was like Trixie Mattel I chose Geronimo for you because of your Native American heritage I was like Geronimo was a Native American war hero whose mother daughter were slaughtered in battle now make your booty bounce yeah that was a frightening uh what do you call that omen of things to come yeah we're slaughtered in battle and driver listen we thought of some really um weird off we're gonna start this off correctly one of our favorite ways of doing our show is the intro so we wrote some fun intros for you guys do you want to go first sure I'm the grizzled Specter of your old neighbor Karen who won't stop bugging her about those skittles you dropped in her porch the other day Pat yeah hi I'm the six extra characters that got you blocked by RuPaul on Twitter Trixie Mattel [Applause] she rollerskates in here with a gun just then I could finally just become one with jacket you know what I would if you if you met a horrible terrible demise god forbid when when I the only person I think suitable to take over would be Jodie Foster [Applause] do you not think so listen I don't want to harass her on Twitter boobs you guys go to a fleet toward doing a viewing party of contact with Jodie Foster quick where the Jodie Foster joke's on you at this point I'm never gonna see it out of out of hate so whatever it's by the way it's actually a good movie I'm like it's ruined for me no it's not that I think I could tell you the plot at this point yeah it's not that great but it is it's it's very special to me so anyways Oh moving right along I have another one if you do mm-hmm I'm gonna say it now go okay hi I'm the skin around your eyes that's gotten so thin and papery dubinina Brown wears it on her head on drag right [Applause] full paper moon fantasy and I'm the chewed-up bubble gum that's really just detoxes ballsack haaa which is on display now at the Fashion panel go ahead go there yeah hi I'm the beginning of the Jo Ann area except the audience actually likes at tricks in the towel you're okay with RuPaul jokes at RuPaul's Drag Con you must not insult the Gaga she will have materialized and vanquish you well like she died just like have a lot in common because like you know we work together and making her story so like you mean like you know each other so it oh the greasy tube of Vaseline that you keep on your dresser because you want to maintain some kind of relatability you know when you let this really disgusting annoying WeHo Queen named Jeremy that I went out with three times last week and he never called me back Katya that's not true but Jeremy if you're here I'm literally gonna beat the [ __ ] [ __ ] out of you Wow I'm the young white girl getting sexy in the city but I live in a bad neighborhood Carrie Crenshaw [Applause] that is a lovely drag down that is that lovely drag name oh my god I fell a specific what who cares oh and I'm Carol Burnett's older sister Carol brunette oh my god [ __ ] idiot hi I'm the lawsuit that you filed against your management cuz in a dramatic turn of events your bad music didn't make money and sky little me huh I'm talking about Kesha no I'm just kidding ah Trixie don't my cousin's name is Kesha he'll be fine warp it out warp it out moving right along hola it's me Valentina I'm feeling very full today cuz for breakfast I had a men's multi a what a what men's multivitamin Oh clap for that body on that runway last night oh my god no microphone no microphone mom I don't need no microphone that can we pause just for one minute and talk about that runway god damn these season 9 girls I can't even clap for them because I'm so envious I'm like your perfect body it's not look that great so now you're like young and flawless in Spanish whatever I think it was missing some kimonos but I liked it where were the casual separates in the bus driver wigs it was a little lacking um so high okay we didn't get a group oh yeah sorry we forgot that oh we're finishing the intros hi I'm the career opportunist waiting to replace Lady Bunny as RuPaul sorta friend and hi I'm Michelle visage and I and welcome to the show where we talk one that was a little long guys the show where we talk about whatever we want because it's our so and not your the live edition okay a live edition no I'm wearing a Heavenly Creatures nail polish from sugarpill available at I mean my jointer so I play my guitar the nails pop off what the hell is a Joe an Arab oh my god I only listen to German industrial member when Lady gaga did an unexpected yet heartfelt departure into country music I just tie up bags of meat and bang him again no you bang them bang them you guys I also think we should get this out of the way and it's a little thing that I like to call oh honey okay Wow hysterically apropos lackluster response it goes like this like I'm gonna say good so we're gonna go honey oh honey are you guys with me okay one two three Heidi oh honey honey meat market honey smells like my Friday night honey hi [Music] this character is the 50 year old gay man who wears the toupee yeah that's also true yeah um you guys I would like to share this with you as well um we created something very fabulous and special for you there's to drag con exclusive items one is this beautiful fan that says the warp if anybody has it please hold it up and you can get them at Katya's booth correction Courtney's booth that I'm squatting out oh yeah the wigs my vanity booth yeah way tonight vanities coming with a new color oh my god it's [ __ ] hot in here bunch of mouth-breathing Oh oh my god yeah she's almost 35 Sunday you're alive still alive I don't know how as we learned Koch is still alive and we don't know how still alive don't know how but you guys are gonna suffer for at least another year alright next on the agenda the agenda Katya stop bringing me candy you handled that yes okay bring me Centrum silver multivitamins but I also I have weak enamel this [ __ ] can hit the pipe for three years teeth are perfect never out of cavity I swear if I carry a jolly rancher in my pocket my jaw falls off I feel like I have been imbued with an impenetrable crust of salvation via some you know supernatural force that can withstand any disaster drug misfortune its I'm a special person the other item you guys's we finally have a shirt with both of our faces on it's available at my booth dry converse calm some of you guys have it it's so cool it is a cotton poly blend and it is $85 and worth every penny ladies y'all maybe the sage um this this section says when and why should you work oh well I can think of three reasons right off the top of my head one you have a lot of grocery shopping to do you're single and you don't know why three it's hot as balls and you're a delicate lady who needs to be cooled by the winds also listen if you do creep up on your 95 year old infirm grandmother and go like she will die so do her a favor and just give it yeah wake up pearl yeah RuPaul didn't have root Paul didn't have one but if he would have he would have woken her up in a gentle way if you are a devastating devastatingly beautiful seven foot tall glamazonian to television hostess and you need to wake up a Brooklynite contestant you just go if you ever yeah if you ever come across a barely legal barely alive in a full coma twink from Brooklyn you just now is that aza or pearl [Applause] don't open the Asda can of worms and you guys aren't ready for that there's kids here oh yeah who's underage all right let me get my that's so fun do you guys want to know why I started doing drag not to [ __ ] fraternize with children [Applause] tomorrow's God's day but come Monday hide your kids hide your wife hide your husband's oh my god moment of silence and respect that jazz and master snatch game snatched my wig so far off my head did you like it I'm torn like Natalie Imbruglia I just know you are laying naked on the floor that's true yeah beaten bruised um I don't like I love her jasmine is so unparalleled in this universe I just I mean she was she had a chicken bone earrings I don't know why chicken bone earrings did you see those I think we know I okay kid [ __ ] and racism get your judge get your if your and you guys don't follow jazz masters on Twitter and on Instagram you're [ __ ] losing out those bit wanted to just seriously be lifted to another plane of existence by pure poetry like it's just this dazzling gifts of human spirit in a one-minute format she's so funny by the way probably forty it does nothing but smoke weed and eat and has the body of a 16 year old male she great she has a 16 year old gymnast abdominals and she's never set foot into a gym I've never felt that she's fully appreciated last night I was glad she got a little more fantasy yeah yeah I think yes and Ola local your own your own la local soap opera corns next popper business what is oh okay I guess we started that sound it's sort of based on a sex noise in pornography I think if it is like a I don't know but I'll try it yeah [Music] yeah yeah we are we just kind of made it up because we thought the first episode should be an episode when we make up something yeah and also he wanted to go post verbal everybody talks that's yeah too much way too much we wanted to appeal to people you know across language barriers yes and also if it's hard to search for it that's how you know people really want to look at it yeah people that originally they were like you can't call that it's hard to search for it if you can't find that on YouTube you didn't want to find it and maybe you should stop looking for us and start looking for yourself yeah similarly if you can't find the fire exits in this building you didn't want to live not that that's why I called you should come home with me because I live like that we are now going to move on to a section where we talk about wait no we should you guys have any um do we talk about the editing oh I'd rather not know we don't you guys so many of the jokes that you like like the war so much of the editing the entire green screen video it's not like we're at computers editing it oh we have to a very special special people oh yeah there these are the people that make this show actually good I'm just an old gramophone playing with a yes we're good - she's like Dolly Parton doing a Christmas Carol it's a mirage okay Mirage I'd like to make this stage you guys we put a name to turn a face to the names the two gentlemen who really create a lot of the jokes Chris and Ron are here you want to meet Chris and Ron we are going to allow them maybe 1 2 minutes of screen time yeah but it don't ladies listen they're very handsome fellas they won we got one straight girl in that well - hey girl is that a rubber chicken she wants to know how to squelch oh my god now Justin Ron actually created the chicken she was never even holding one first you have to decide it's gender and it doesn't matter which yeah okay and then you locate the mouse that looks about right and then you insert your tongue like so as I just think you have to think more Rene Russo and Thomas Crown Affair unless Kathleen Turner and were the Roses okay so so there you go now that has certified let's see what do I got Hep C Hep B Hep one two three and her are you gonna touch it to your mouth now yeah are you gonna touch it to your mouth are you you don't have to you did see that - Dead - Dead [Applause] kids these days at my own panel thanks girl thanks girl I hope I hope your driver tries to talk to you it's very la we don't believe in God we're like I hope your uber driver tries to have a conversation with you I hope your cleaning lady comes when you're home you are okay should we bring Chris and Ron up I went yes but now I'm serious ladies there are handsome fellas in Chris it has a special place in my heart so if you touch them gonna [ __ ] kill you Becca yeah not any further ado are they're gonna drop from the ceiling or something Tandi best drag queen entrance ever remember like Tandy yes can you guys do a drum roll please drum roll free to the stage Ronald and Christopher I think part of the fun thing about our show is on we actually have two editors who are entirely heterosexual men well let's let's not jump to conclusions Tracy my sexuality is the state of mind that can be malleable with the right odor do you think after watching hours and hours of us unedited if they were in love with us they would have said something and it's a wonder you're not seriously like incapacitated at mental health facility how do you do it with the secret to editing - garbage idiots that's the right answer that's the right answer my life so much worse but thank you so much could you be more specific how much better what are you doing after this I am going to do a triple salchow open my legs 30 degrees suction cup through tingling onto my [ __ ] hole in there you've never done this before [Music] Ronald's please say hello hi he's shy oh is it not working Ron they've silenced you it sounds good the redheads always get the short end of the stick in this world well when God when God decides you're ready to talk the thing will start working is it working Ronald little voices yeah little voice big dick [Laughter] so they created so many things um tell us what it's like to try to string us together in a way that makes it seem like we know what we're talking about listen let's not force the humility though because we have improved a great deal don't you think you've witnessed our progression from a couple of ragtag bunch of idiots Psychopaths to two glorious until human being Hey the final frontier well because we used to talk for like 45 minutes and then they would have to dub over us hire actors to play us just to like string anything together also we have a terrible syndrome of their like today we're gonna talk about high school and then instead we were talking about cucumbers anything else yeah how did you guys enjoy doing the green-screen episode was it difficult to just be I mean because I'm just putting myself in your shoes I don't want sure yeah like the contours of my body have a very seductive almost like hypnotizing effect on the male psyche what about the texture of your body changes full chub the whole time full chub at the moment I green screened it out then I was back to normal but too much contour I saw too much yeah I've seen so much of Katya by the way oh my god so much of kata and Trixie yeah like we don't always wear things under a nightgown no but I always do bend over and pull up in my butthole laughter yeah when you're doing a four-minute like stream-of-consciousness performance of st. hard with no clothes on yeah yeah it's my brand or whatever who invented that is your branch oh that's his claim to fame you guys well we're getting some shade for adding too much strategy you know Ronald is a visionary thinker he thinks outside the box but also tries to [ __ ] the box boys thing si oh my god I like boxes and he is the most gentle caring soul as you can tell he's a wonderful person he's probably never gonna kill or rape anybody the tragedy is that we would we we would truly scoop up each of them marry them and take them away with our drivers tevia money today good to be true kind of situation yeah it's the it would change the magic of the program like for example I hate her I can only see her she sees me once a month begrudgingly and then hits me well I bet what originally with our schedules I think our show was so fun to make because we only ever saw each other in that green room sometimes yeah but now she lives in LA and it's super fun now it's yeah I take these two fingers in a scratch outside or a bathroom window and I just say she won't take me to Universal Studios I want to play Harry Potter did you hear that jinx jinx was telling us that she got stuck at TSA because they were checking her wands didn't know what they were meanwhile jinx day-to-day dresses like a [ __ ] witch oh yeah so she was a witch at TSA like this is my Wang one time that [ __ ] was like Trixie Mattel did you tell people that I dress like a swamp witch meanwhile she was in a floor-length black gown and had wet hair and before I could answer she flew across the moon and she does this thing before she boards she like at the air at the airport she'll sleep on the floor face down yeah wet hair will sort of form this crust of a halo around her head she is a pristine creature if she if she falls asleep in front of a TV honey it's the ring honey honey the ring honey that's what I bend over honey there's the ring honey oh wait I have a question for you guys who would win in a fight near her and I'm talking like a UFC sanctioned you know all fist kicking everything it would be a drug-crazed bra oh my god got your eyes out and use them for witchcraft before she even knew a hitter you think I first Rumble with a crackhead no detox and I were in the same / pool today alright with on the agenda I have a real question - um my real comment also is I think part of the fun of our program is Chris and Ron are not gay so they don't believe in Oh watch drag race of course I don't think you knew but that is important that's like I feel like that's the key to the swirly success of the show yeah because we have lots of people who watch a lot of people's husbands and boyfriends who are not gay watch it right because it's it's comedy material but we just happen to be in drag yeah glorious beautiful stylistically challenging drag every savagely challenged do you think you actually we could get sponsored by Casper mattress and then have like the booth where we just lay in bed what'd you guys get in bed with us and not bring bedbugs not bring us I have a Casper mattress and it's actually in front you do I do the RuPaul hypnotism works on you it was Michelle now yeah I avoid aluminum in my deodorant and I sleep on a Casper she it's [ __ ] great and it comes in a little coffin or something it's really cute yeah yeah and your ghost for Casper on a Casper is perfect I love that vector so I'm having a barbecue after this it's for three people it's a 29 Chris and Ron I don't want you guys to get too famous so can you go away thank you Chris and Ron thank you thank you thank you not only it's not just the straightness it's keeping them and they will notice that that helps the you know and they will be performing a six hour free meet-and-greet outside no yes no it's okay I told them if they made like a shirt with I would buy a shirt with Ron's face on it I would I would use it as a rag but you know I'll rag I keep next to my bed I just kidding haha I don't have a bed I just where would I keep it or would I keep it I would blow up an entire town just to ride his face like the Kentucky Derby when I when I sleep instead of a bed I'll weave my long rat tail into a willow tree and just hang there's always time for a rat tail speaking of which we have job security that our future you know ourselves in the future gloriously played Mike he has better lace kasha Davis and tempest dujour did you guys see that before yeah yeah it was like eerily uncanny how well she impersonated me it was kind of a it was an insult in a tribute at the same time last year you guys on our panel we felt like I felt like we didn't answer enough of you guys's questions yeah I went I went it's like really good juicy curveballs you guys want to chat about the program math science nothing's off-limits there's also he doesn't get enough credit somebody sits behind the camera and moderates all this [ __ ] in the basement Pete does it you guys he makes the show yeah and he's gay and he's single and he's single and he has a rat tail yes yes Willem no that isn't well that is way too dressed up for Willem it could you look fabulous what's your question young man young lady I was wondering if Barbara throws her fan through the roof at 30 miles an hour yeah what is the chance that you two would have drag children well that's great two topics I love to touched on and let me figure this out let me figure this out human biology and mathematic Harry the one ladies gentlemen bring the stage carry the one the answer is the limit does not exist but like what about house of Mattel illogic OVA we don't really merge houses because it capitalism and communism don't believe me much yeah yeah I'm here I'm here to generate income she's here to just take yours to disseminate yeah I want to burn it in a fire what did you see on the show you bury your money in a hole yeah I bury my money in a hole knife what about one from this side yeah what's up oh you look okay girl fantasy coming up just between us girls don't tell anybody I see my pot every day but just a little bit of my it doesn't matter live in a cave for a month we're like a fun sparkly table go out to a balcony make sure it has like a tall railing so you don't jump and then scream at the top of your lungs ah somebody is gonna help you somebody's gonna help you or just call any number in the phone book and say I have a problem you got five minutes that's how AAA was formed you know also if you are you want my personal phone number after this show I'm gonna go get cupcakes with my friend Jocelyn no Oh excellent question Oh shakely shakely shakely yeah in a miraculous feat of bioengineering they'll they'll clone her twice more yeah and it'll be a clean sweep of the three but the ultimate thing is to break your leg and be asked back if I ever get to if I ever get to do all-stars three I'm gonna walk in find my light snap my femur and be like see you next year that was brilliant that really is she is she is a true drag genius and nobody thought coming she she just boots scooted down the runway and those crunchy Tonya Harding herself honestly listen if I walked in and saw some of those fierce ass [ __ ] I would broke my own leg I got I got to get out of here I think you should do it now too I think I think in my heart of hearts I want buy-in Tina it's so early to tell anything could happen you look good honey Amazon Prime yeah congratulations [Music] I think we're which one Katya she's hypothermic Sally obvious when hasn't she been hyper like well I had a brief two-headed moment wait would you do Siamese with me um I think that would get a little bit fraught with tension yeah I knock a lot plus when I inevitably die before you you want to carry the dead I wanna drag your dead corpse around you kidding me up that gives such a mystique I'm dead guy oh this I just wear a coat over it yeah what's your question beautiful I mean listen you get to be you we have to be us so you're sitting pretty you look fabulous it's good for you girl put that on a [ __ ] postcard yeah I know seriously the thing somebody mentioned that to me the other day and I thought like I had it like a real you know I on the Vinson Maya Angelou moment and I'm and I was like it doesn't [ __ ] matter I mean granted yeah there are people who will persecute people for being different of course but like at the end of the day people are so riddled with narcissism that they're so busy thinking about themselves oh yeah do it anyway yeah you look fab oh my god oh I wish everybody dressed like this every day what's up girl what would the first thing you would do trample you know I can't think I would want to be I want to be um have you guys ever seen a Clydesdale there's big ones I would want to be one of those giant ones cuz I think it's like being a drag it's gonna be a horse be the giant want to be the teeny one that I would get a custom horse human-like ensemble like a 3-piece tuxedo with a nice hat and then watch the Kentucky Derby from the stand and I just like sort of like whisper to the person next to me is this kind of weird oh my god what about a drag queen who's really dumb who wears big hats Kentucky derpy lucky people I like what's up handsome yeah cut and dry Coco Peru Varla and Oh a crumb crumb fatah who's here from San Francisco oh you guys thank you for having us they got to clean the room for the next one I'll be at my I'll be at my booth all day all day all day [Music]

Channel: WOWPresents

Views: 2,452,925

Rating: 4.9499793 out of 5

Keywords: wonder, world, world of wonder, wow, wow presents, 2017, dragcon, live, rupaul's, unhhhh

Id: 8CdZkz_g7c4

Length: 37min 5sec (2225 seconds)

Published: Tue May 02 2017

Reddit Comments

[u/goodtobepharaoh]

Katya: Alright, who's underage?

Trixie: That's so fun! Do you guys wanna know why I started doing drag? Not to fucking fraternize with children.

[u/[deleted]]

WOW didn't make us wait a year before releasing a panel vid?? It's a Christmas miracle!!

[u/SassandtheCity]

Trixie doing Jinkx Monsoon's voice was so eerily spot-on.

[u/TaylorGenery]

me: am i really going to watch 40 minutes of Unhhh?

40 minutes later

me: apparently i am

[u/axestogrind]

The audience was NOT having it at Trixie's Joanne joke 💀💀

[u/NotQute]

I usually get second hand embarrassment from con panels. Is there any particular moment that will make my skeleton want to leave my body and run away down the street, or are the attendees mostly chill and asking good questions?

[u/KHRoxas]

The Geronimo bit ooh my god hahaha

[u/cvmxp14]

Trixie doing Jinx for Snatch Game on All Stars 3 CONFIRMED

[u/AsGarnYam]

"2nd year in a row the most well attended panel" It kind of amazing when you think they came from being 5th and 6th on the show to the most popular panel