Trump’s Low-Quality USA Bibles | Ronna McDaniel Is Terrible | RNC’s Big Lie Litmus Test

thank you my friends and you are my friends Welcome to The Late Show I'm your host St colar today today ladies and gentlemen we got a we got a rare positive update on one of Trump's thousands of court cases yesterday this ruling was yesterday yesterday the judge in the Stormy Daniels hush money case imposed a gag order on Trump okay that's positive but raises a disturbing question how do you gag someone who speaks out of their ass the answer is very carefully and if you ever thought that this Avalanche of legal scrutiny would somehow shame Trump from his non-stop grifting of the Rubes you are a sweet sweet child one of God's innocence and should not be allowed in the room where daddy keeps his sharp things because yesterday Donald Trump announced a deal to Endor a $60 God Bless the USA Bible yes Donald Trump is now Hawking a Bible it's just like any other good book except in the middle of this one there's a centerold wow wow Mary was a Bethlehem 8 I wouldn't kick her I wouldn't kick her out of the manger for eating crackers now this has come as no surprise to anyone making a prophet is Trump's religion as his Jesus famously said it is easier for camel to go through the eye of a needle if you pay me four easy installments of 1995 act now disciples are standing by Trump made Trump made this announcement on Truth social where he also revealed his collaborator I'm proud to be partnering with my very good friend Lee Greenwood who doesn't love his song God Bless the USA yes who doesn't love Greenwoods God Bless the USA and his other big hits like thank you for blessing the USA God you know who really loves that song Lee Greenwood he has a different ad for this Bible that says this introducing the limited edition God Bless the USA Bible inspired by Lee Greenwood's hit song and the most recognized patriotic Anthem in America God Bless the USA yes I challenge anyone to name a more recognized patriotic Anthem in this entire nation a national sort of Anthem if you will I kid of course we all know it's Party in the USA thank you for your service Smiley long may you wrecking ball I believe the God Bless the USA Bible is the best Holy Scripture named after a country song since the take this job and shove it babago Johnny Paycheck did so love shoving things Trump explained what you'll be getting for your 60 bucks this Bible is the King James version and also includes our Founding Father documents yes the Constitution also the Bill of Rights the Declaration of Independence and the Pledge of Allegiance so you're spending $60 on public domain writing if you order now you'll get all the lyrics to Camp Town Races and a picture of Jesus most beloved disciple Steamboat Willie Trump trump continued to shill all Americans need a Bible in their home and I have many yes it's true many he has to have spare Bibles because every time he holds one it bursts into flames now I'm sorry did I do go on it's my favorite book it's a lot of people's favorite book I love this book I love the snake I love Jonah because whale I love Abraham Dragon his son up to the mountain for a Human Sacrifice by the way Eric want to go camping a lot of Bibles on the Shelf over here there's a lot of Bibles on that shelf Trump was sure to point out how you buying this Bible would single-handedly save America this Bible is a reminder that the biggest thing we have to bring back America to make America great again is our religion now I know a lot of people think that but I'm just curious what the hell is going on with that camera angle that is no way to cover an edit Jim Jim what is going on that is not my best nostril now if if you head to the God Bless the USA Bibles website you can find frequently asked questions and in there is this 100% real 100% weird query what if my Bible has sticky [Applause] Pages this is a frequently Asked question evidently the workers at the Bible Factory really get excited over the word be even though uh it just received the Trump bump the God Bless the USA Bible's been around for a few years now and the reviews are in 79% of reviewers gave it the lowest possible rating one star the one positive review said five out of five stars sticky just the way I like them Trump's not what's up what's going on buddy going to be there all night Trump's not just busy spreading the good news he's also truth thing the dumb news you see a few days ago he bragged a great honor to have won both the Club Championship and the senior Club Championship this week at Trump International Well turns out that Trump didn't win those championships fair and square and I'll will give you a moment to pick your jaw up off the floor because turns out sports writer Rick Riley who has golfed with Trump says his wins are as fake as Vita cheese how dare you sir Vita isn't fake it is full of all natural ingredients like yellow and rectangle Riley says golfers even famous golfers allow Trump to cheat for one simple reason and I've asked people how did you let him cheat he's cheated against Tiger Woods he's cheated against Dustin Johnson and when I asked him why did you let him cheat and take the 20 bucks they all say the same thing I wanted my own story about Trump cheating okay well then that's understandable because the only other way to get a story about Trump cheating is to marry him there's what I know oh there's news about former RNC chairperson and drunk sorority girl waving at an oncoming train R McDaniel in case you're unfamiliar with McDaniel she is terrible as head of the RNC R repeatedly claimed the 2020 election was rigged helped Trump's campaign assemble fake electors and even was on a call with Trump when he pressured election officials not to certify vote totals in a key Michigan County happy women's History Month gals it's 2024 you too can be morally bankrupt dictator enabling douche nuggets representation matters well on Friday we learned that NBC News had hired McDaniel as an onair contributor no surprise people got mad at NBC some surprise NBC got mad at NBC specifically their anchors you got to ask yourself what is she bring NBC news we weren't asked our opinion of the hiring but if we were we would have strongly objected to it the fact that Miss McDaniel is on the payroll at NBC news to me that is inexplicable don't hire anyone close to the crimes wow that is strong talk that is tough stuff I haven't seen onair Talent Rebel like that since Elmo said the Alfred peace loan Foundation can kiss Elmo's furry butt so can viewers like you NBC anchor Kristen Welker interviewed McDaniel and confronted her about her support of Trump's promise that he will free the January 6 riers do you disagree with Trump saying he's going to free those who've been charged I do not think people who committed violent acts on January 6 should be freed so you disagree with that he's been saying that for months R why not speak out earlier when you're the RNC chair you you kind of take one for the whole team right now I get to be a little bit more myself right yeah before I was carrying water for a fascist wannabe dictator now I'm getting bangs it's fun you know frames the face well late last night we learned that NBC News had fired R McDaniel so there she is she was fired by NBC reminds me of Trump's famous Apprentice catchphrase this this is just the most Rec recent time McDaniel's been fired she was also recently ousted as chair of the Republican National Committee which is now being run by Trump daughter-in-law and stunt double for Janice from the Muppets Lara Trump Lara and the Trump team immediately fired most of the RNC staff and are making them reapply for their jobs reportedly they've been asking any potential hires whether they believe the 2020 election was stolen yes if you want to work with the RNC you got to believe Trump's big lie the other interview questions include how sexy is Donald Trump on a scale of hubba hubba to boing and will you give me $60 for this flag Bible we got a great show for you tonight my guests are Lee n and fared Zakaria but when we come back meanwhile join us one [Music] [Applause] to [Music] a

Channel: The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Views: 496,944

Keywords: The Late Show, Late Show, Stephen Colbert, Steven Colbert, Colbert, celebrity, celeb, celebrities, late night, talk show, comedian, comedy, CBS, joke, jokes, funny, funny video, funny videos, humor, hollywood, famous

Id: crwjX4uIUFc

Length: 11min 11sec (671 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 28 2024