Trump’s Bad Day In Court | The Bidenomics Goldilocks Zone | Stephen Colbert’s Vibe Session

welcome one and all to The Late Show I'm your host Steven colar we are right we are right in the middle we are smack dab in the heart of primary season and Donald Trump is out there trying to win over the voters that matter most his juries today today he was back in the Manhattan courtroom for the second defamation trial against him brought by egene Carroll you may remember last May a jury found that Trump sexually assaulted Carol and then defamed her by lying about it a crime known in Republican circles as presumptive nominee now I'll tell you all about it in the latest installment of our ongoing series road to the White House and or big house Donald Trump Fe the people America decides Andor con F we are an Institute and a powerful death penalty now Trump uh he actually testified today briefly of course the last time Trump was allowed to speak in court it went completely off the rails which did not escape the man overseeing this case federal district court judge and Batman's backup Butler Lewis Kaplan Kaplan set very strict guidelines for Trump attorney Alina habba seen here saying I don't know what happened to your couch as upholstery why do you ask habba habba limited herself to a series of yes or no questions which Trump failed to answer with just yes or no instead he did this habba did you instruct anyone to hurt Ms Caroll Trump no I just wanted to defend myself my family and frankly the presidency judge Kaplan broke in and instructed the jury to disregard everything after no which is fitting because the whole trial is the result of trump disregarding everything after no now Trump habba trump was supposed to testify on Monday right this past Monday but the trial was delayed after a juror got sick and Alina habba also said she was feeling ill and had a fever after being exposed to covid-19 of course her client right there could have cured her instantly with a little horse pace and a shot of bleach but it turns out she did recover kind of quickly because the very next day habo was photographed in New Hampshire at a trump Victory party busted reminds me of when I said my appendix burst then someone snapped a pick of me front row at Guns and [Applause] Roses some Axel Rose fans here the damning photo of habo was posted by a DieHard Trump supporter named Dylan quat truchi fun fact quat truchi is Italian for four douchebags now seems like Trump's team uh realized immediately this picture was not a great look for the defense because shortly after Dylan posted it he was kicked out of that party and he recorded the kickout live I'm getting removed from the Trump event why do I have to leave sir why are you removing me can you give me a reason why did Trevor tell you to remove me I saw Trevor and the guy just pointed like him to me and said I have to leave I'm like the biggest Trump guy here I was the deputy director of The Campaign this is how they treat loyalty in Trump World correct yes correct Che that is exactly how they treat loyalty in Trump World when will will these people learn ow wow after everything I've done for it how is this hot stove treating my hand this way I'll never do that with my other [Applause] one quatchi then took to Twitter to protest saying end the war on alpha males yeah brother you tell them cuz we all know the motto of alpha males can someone please find Trevor what I'm going I'm going if it was a bad day in court for trump it was even worse for his former economic adviser Peter Navaro seen here saying I'm open throw me the baby a quick reminder for those who have forgotten I don't blame me if you have Navaro was one of the architects of the false elector scheme to steal the election from Joe Biden well a few months ago Navaro was found guilty of criminal contempt of congress for refusing to testify about his role in January 6th well today he was sentenced to four months in prison consequences truth and consequences here's a little tip for Navaro on your first day in go up to the biggest guy in the prison yard and say hello Mr President lately lately Trump has been treating the folks at his rallies to an unlikely warm-up act he's been playing British indie rock band The [Music] Smiths hell yeah nothing gets the crowd riled up quite like a plaintive acoustic ballad I want to see him pump up a football team okay let's get down and get out there and put it all on the field field and win but first our fight song one two 3 Everybody Hurts tonight you can't do the you can't do the cats oh the [Applause] [Laughter] cats the name of the song they're playing there is please please please let me get what I want which for most Trump supporters is custody of their kids now sure no all right after seeing after seeing footage of the rally yesterday the Smith's guitarist Johnny Maher denounced Trump's use of their song adding consider this shut right down right now rock and [Music] roll rock and roll also copyright lawyers intellectual property our current president is also running and no one is suing him for his campaign's pre-show music pop goes the weasel yesterday did you hear about that mulbury bush wow yesterday he got some good news because the United Auto Workers indorsed Joe Biden that's right United Auto Workers United Auto Workers that's great guys but if you really want to help please build him an Optimus Prime body beep beep I'm a truck Jack so now with the uaw's endorsement alongside those of the national air traffic controllers Association and the Brotherhood of railroad signalmen Biden has a support of Planes Trains and Automobiles all modes of transportation time to pick a side roller blades Canal Boatman UAW president Shan Fain did not mince words when talking about the Republican front runner Donald Trump is a scab okay I I I get where you're coming from but the polite term is cold sore American oh there's good new there there's more good news for Biden the economy is cooking right along the Dows north of 38,000 today wages are up unemployment below 4% for 23 months in a row and today the Commerce Department announced the economy grew at 3.3% rate in the last quarter now what does that mean well it's a little technical but according to macroeconomic Theory number go up equal good now is that right can you check my math can you check me can you check me on that got you you check you got you got that okay for all last year bunch of people were predicting a recession but instead every economic indicator of biomics is positive or as the news people call it it's an economy that is cooling on the inflation front but still showing growth on the the spending front the Goldilocks perfect Goldilocks scenario we're getting some of that Goldilocks it is Goldilocks this is Goldilocks that's right jack things are going Goldilocks Now look up look here I'm serious folks I knew Goldilocks nice gal real particular real particular about her porridge not me though hot cold don't bother me I'll toss that bowl down too sweets soft foods doctor's orders the old mouth chicklets aren't was aren't what they used to be but Austin lost the words there a little bit can't can't win them every time but even though it looks like there's no recession and the economy looks good on paper people feel like it's not bouncing back and this bad feeling the media has dubbed the vibe session and I get it it but thankfully I have a foolproof way to bring the nation out of a Vibe session this is Steven Corell five [Applause] session what's cooking my fiscal cats you out there counting your duckets let me brighten your economic Outlook with my Bongo Sonic output hit it dig you're drowning in dough but you don't feel it cuz it's not yet bread I'm talking that sweet pumping nickel baby cuz I heard from a little bird that in the 2023 the US economy accelerated at a 2.5% annualized pace and call prices for personalized consumption expenditures Rose just 2% in the fourth quarter no wonder janets yes in so no need to go slow Joe the vibe session will be Jazz suit and if the economy starts this cooking in November we'll make Trump A Way Gone daddy we got a great show for you tonight my guest is [Applause] [Music] Martin [Music] oh

Channel: The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Views: 2,079,593

Keywords: The Late Show, Late Show, Stephen Colbert, Steven Colbert, Colbert, celebrity, celeb, celebrities, late night, talk show, comedian, comedy, CBS, joke, jokes, funny, funny video, funny videos, humor, hollywood, famous

Id: 4wllb4fpcog

Length: 11min 42sec (702 seconds)

Published: Fri Jan 26 2024