Trevor Noah Live at the Apollo

good evening i grew up in south africa that's why i still live i enjoy it grew up there during a time known as apartheid uh for those who don't know apartheid was a law in our country that made it illegal for black and white people to interact with one another you know this was against the law and so this world was awkward for me growing up because because i grew up in a mixed family well with me being the next one in the family my uh my mother's a black woman plus a woman born in south africa that's one of the languages with the cliques sort of a black woman and then my father swiss but they didn't care you know there were mavericks fighting the system my mom was arrested for being with my dad she would get fined she would get thrown into prison for the weekend but still she'd come back and she's like i don't care i don't care come tell me who to love i want a white man whoa this is crazy my mom was crazy you know and my dad was also like well you know how the swiss love chocolate so he was and so and so they got together and they had me which was illegal so so i was born a crime which is which is something i don't think they ever thought through because as a family we couldn't live together you know like in the streets we couldn't even be seen together my father would have to walk on the other side of the road and he could just wave at me from far like a creepy pedophile well like a pedophile i don't have to say creepy like a pedophile because creepy implies there's some other sort of pedophile there's none there's no there's no classy pedophiles there's no need no like afternoon ladies afternoon after no no just browsing just browsing it's so classy no it's a pedophile and my mom could walk with me my mom could walk with me but but if the police showed up she'd have to let go of my hand and drop me and act like i wasn't hers every single time because we we weren't supposed to exist as a family so my mom would would let go it was like a little game we played police would show up like woo should be like oh i don't know i don't know no no it's not mine it's not mine oh no i don't know it was horrible for me i felt like a bag of weed it was a tough time and the downside of being light was that just that being light i was different people mocked me gave me names like a mixed breed half cast i hate that term half why half why not double or twice as nice i don't know people give you weird names i just wanted a cool name you know i wanted to be black to be honest that's what i ever wanted especially since one one day growing up i met an american and uh and he was shocked that in south africa we had all these titles and he he said to me said well you know trevor if you you go out to america though they'll label you as black and i said really he was like oh hell yeah yeah buddy everybody's black out there yeah you'd be super black sounds good to me super black yeah and i made a choice like first chance i get i go out to america i'm gonna get a piece of that black and i did bought it a flight it was an 18-hour journey johannesburg to new york i didn't sleep a wink i just sat there in my chair like a madman watching every single black american movie i could find just sitting there going crazy practicing like yeah yeah king kong ain't got [ __ ] on me yeah yeah sorry oh the chicken please the chicken thank you oh that's fine thank you yeah put it in your mouth yeah 18 hours of flying 18 hours of practice i landed in new york and i was fluent in my black american for shizzle my nizzle everything i had the walk i had the i saw black i was even laughing but i was like oh my man my man oh this you this you that means the coolest thing in the world black americans are so cool and and i was that black i was super black i was loving it until this guy walked up to me i don't know it didn't even know me tapped me on the shoulder yeah i'm talking to you man i'm just saying we made it baby we made it eh and now that we're here our kind we gotta stick together hombre our kind 18 hours of flying and i wasn't black i was mexican mexican so i started learning spanish if not why not then i've also started learning german i learned german to connect with my father you know lost contact with him for many years because of apartheid and so now we're starting to learn each other which is taking time but we're doing it slowly i think the language will help me you know because i don't think he's he's proud of me he loves me but i haven't earned his pride i think partly because of my job as a comedian i don't rank that high in the world of german any things comes across in the small conversations you know like one day we're having lunch my dad looks at me and he goes what do you want to do now you've got a job they work i said yeah dad i'm a comedian stand-up comedian he's like oh yeah yeah so the clown yeah no it's not whatever german's holding me back you know i dream of impressing him with his language i'll get to his house one day he'll welcome me at the gate like ah clown boy i'll be like father it's epic it's got that feeling so i've started learning i learn in different ways you know to watch german movies uh play german speeches on my ipod when i sleep your brain remembers things you don't even know it's beautiful the only hiccup was it turned out i downloaded some of hitler's speeches it's not like google warned me don't judge me google wasn't like oh not those ones no just let me download everything and um and so i learned some of his nuances not his philosophies it's just i've been told that when i speak german sometimes i sound distinctly hitlerish which i found out in germany which is not the best place to find out that you've got hitler vibes would have rather found out at home and it was actually it's funny now not so much then i was in cologne germany beautiful area i'll never forget i was walking around and i went into like a little sandwich shop you know like one of those subways where you make your own sandwich and i walked in the woman was really nice to me she was like couldn't talk can you see in here i looked at her and i thought confidence trevor confidence is and she shot herself i'll never forget the look in her face she went pale she looked me straight in the eye and she said the schwa hitler which means the black hitler i was so happy cause she said hitler but at least she said i was black you guys are fantastic thanks for having me

Channel: ArseRaptor

Views: 3,527,734

Keywords: stand up, comedy, funny, arseraptor, josh, widdicombe, eddie, izzard, trevor, noah

Id: vi7SeBI7z9A

Length: 7min 58sec (478 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 25 2013

Reddit Comments

[u/EquinsuOcha]

That was surprisingly entertaining.

[u/Setiri]

I like this guy, thanks for posting him op. I'll try to find more of his stuff.

[u/Carstoned]

DIS YOU?!

[u/death2monkey]

I've never heard of this guy before. New fan right here!

[u/maxcowdisease]

He's a great storyteller.

[u/Desembler]

the "Hitler" speech had the tone dead on.

[u/bfisher91]

That was fantastic!

[u/preorder_bonus]

Damn the title totally threw me off...I spent 66% of the video trying to understand what Hitler had to do with this guy. Amazing pay off tho.

[u/Metamorphism]

Clown boy. haahaha