The Real Reason You Get Irritated About the Small Things | The Oprah Winfrey Show | OWN

okay yes ma'am right there behind John I have a question with I I can feel compassion for somebody maybe a crabby waitress or something like that I can think well maybe she's got trouble with the kids at home but what I have no tolerance for is people making noise in a movie theater cracking their gum we don't go we don't go out to dinner we don't go to movies it's it's sad because people irritate us so much it's the two of you together as a couple you you're irritated by people yes an example would be like afford a restaurant and the cell phone situation where someone will talk loudly on a cell phone when you're in a nice quiet restaurant and you're sitting there trying to enjoy yourself and because somebody is just so rude and self-absorbed that they're infringing on our serenity yeah you excuse me for saying this but you don't sound like you're describing someone who's serene and what what I'm suggesting is that whatever the irritant is that the actual source of your irritation is far deeper than that yeah and you can tell that that's the case whenever your response to a minor irritant is out of proportion uh-huh if I may a state one thing is what you said earlier it kind of hit home to me and maybe I had a lightbulb moment that when these things occur that upset me sometimes I you said it's because you can't control it and I think that dad hits home with me because my biggest fear is losing people that I love then passing on and I think that's what gets me that's right it's it's it's fears at that level that are coming out in the irritation from somebody who's speaking too loudly or playing the television in the motel room they don't get that you don't get that no I don't get that one bit is anybody else not get that we don't get that we don't get how somebody on a cell phone has anything to do with his fear of losing people he loves I think a lots of people have that fear of losing somebody you love but I mean who hasn't encountered some person who was on the cellphone acting in a way that we felt was inappropriate when you judge someone the origins of that impulse to judge are deeper and different than the trigger okay I got that do you have your fear and your pains and until you look at them you will continue to be cold this is a point where I connect we're trying to connect does the cell phone have anything to do with his fear of losing people if I collaborate it's the it's when he mentioned earlier the loss of control so I'm going deeper what am I most fearful in my life of losing control over losing loved ones and because I have that fear then I figure if off I can control this situation maybe subconsciously affair I can control other things that I know if I can't I got it hi youtubers I'm excited to give you an update about our own YouTube channel now you can find new videos every day they're the kind of videos it will make you look at life differently they may even make you laugh a little bit who doesn't need a daily dose of that so here's just a taste of some of what you'll see

Channel: OWN

Views: 645,409

Keywords: own, oprah winfrey network, own network, oprah, oprah winfrey, Talks Show, OWN, The Oprah Winfrey Show, The Real Reason You Get Irritated About the Small Things, #oprahwinfreyshow, Oprah Winfrey Show, oprah show, oprah interview, maya angelou

Id: PBUUyOrVWwU

Length: 3min 45sec (225 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 27 2015