The Purpose and Priority of Singleness | Dr. Myles Munroe

we have been driven by our culture to learn to relate to other people matter of fact our parents have literally taught us how not to be single our parents emphasize the idea that we should get along with people get along with the other kids get along with their neighbors get along we've been taught to get along with people so we've been built in our culture to always try to get along with other people that's the way we've been conditioned to think we've been forced almost to get to know people and so we grew up in a culture where we are really there's a contradiction because we want to get to know people but we don't know how to get to know people we need the baby to take off for many place because we're recording this thank you very much appreciate the baby but the baby is being recorded so I'll appreciate if you slip out for a minute and calm the baby down and then you can bring the baby back matter of fact that's my little cute little grandbaby that and they praise the Lord I adopted that kid I think the baby he heard my voice papa this point I'm telling you is very important we've been and the thing is this happened when you don't even know what happened you've been trained to focus on other people share with your brother don't eat that by yourself get along with those people why can't your kids get along with each other and everything is conditioned on other people and that's why we not equipped to have relationships here's why because the most important relationship in life should not be interpersonal relationship but that's what we've been taught get along with your neighbor get to know people go out girl move around get to know some people boy and they've been pushed but the most important relationship is the other one it is intra personal relationship you cannot have interpersonal relationship until you have settled the intra personal relationship but our culture doesn't teach that how many times have you ever heard your parents say while you were growing up boy why don't you love yourself girl love yourself never and so we almost grew up with the idea that we are not lovable likeable and shouldn't even be loved by our selves which is which is the foundation of our problems the reason is because if you don't know who you are don't understand who you are you don't appreciate who you are and have no knowledge of who you are then you cannot love appreciate or value other people so the most important pursuit in life is self-knowledge and this is what singleness is all about singleness is about finding yourself loving yourself valuing yourself putting the highest estimation on yourself accepting yourself understanding yourself and then appreciating yourself so much that now you can share yourself with someone else but our culture's don't teach that now let me give you five things to write down people think that they need to get married to be fulfilled and this is the pressure part of our culture if you are thirty-five and you ain't married they think something's wrong with you maybe you are homosexual maybe you were lesbian what do you do it an especially if your friends are girls or boys like yourself they begin to think all kind of funny things in other words they almost think that if you ain't married you are strange you are awkward this is dangerous and it's wrong you don't need to be married to fulfill God's will let no one put you under that pressure don't allow anyone to suggest to you that unless you are married you can't fulfill God's purpose marriage is not a requirement for fulfilling your purpose as a matter of fact marriage is designed only for earth and what I mean by that is you will discover in the biblical culture that Jesus was very specific when they asked him about life after death he said in the afterlife there is no marriage nor giving in marriage so hey boy say thank you Jesus let me tell you why cause some of y'all can't wait to get rid of that poison imagine living with them forever and ever for it as a depressing experience so thank God is only for Earth so marriage is really a temporary agreement between two people to live it in a context of holy Covenant but it's not a requirement to fulfill God's will and why is that important that means that you should get busy fulfilling God's will stop looking for someone to marry let them find you I know that that sounds simple and maybe it is tough for you but I have discovered that if you don't do that you're going to do some dumb things you can make some dumb decisions so don't feel pressured that you have to wait for someone before you get busy with God's will point number four failure in marriage can derail your purpose in your life not only is marriage not necessary to fulfill God's purpose for your life but it might interrupt the purpose how many people you know were doing well until they got married I mean they were own focused they got their life in order you know they were serving god they were building their business they had a good situation going building their house they were on a target and then they got married to some bum or some girl who don't know what she wants and then life just messes up it happens often so marriage itself could be a destructive experience so don't don't think that marriage is all that they painted up to be believe me marriages is a very dangerous thing there's some ended from who could tell you the dangers that they've been through the stress so I want to relieve you from that pressure and number five it is better to be unmarried unhappy say yes say goes come on go in here yeah well I tell you some folks are married right now and they wish they was you PMS a free at last they say free again free again Great God Almighty let me be free again you know but they say loose goat don't know how ty Goldfield [Laughter] write that one down as a good one remember it is better to be what unmarried than to be married and depressed listen and this is this is true the loneliest people have ever met our married people do you know why nothing can be more lonely than being stuck in a marriage that ain't working man that's hell on earth you can't get out it's loneliness so please if you are unmarried give God praise I thought y'all excited yet man don't rush into stuff that people can't wait to get out of so don't pressure yourself into that write this down divorce is not the unpardonable sin the reason why I put that there because sometimes people go through a bad experience and they do experience divorce and then they feel that their life ain't gonna work anymore God doesn't want to use them anymore his purposing is going to be fulfilled anymore that is not true God forgives all sins including unfaithfulness or the broking of a covenant in marriage this is not an imponderable sin many great people have gone on to change the world after divorce Kathryn Kuhlman was a divorcee she changed the world what a powerful woman so sometimes we run on hard times and things don't work out pick yourself up and don't get don't just get custody of the kids that's what people do most of the time they missed the point first you get custody of yourself get yourself back and so don't be afraid to not be married it's not the solution to any problems sometimes it's the formation of great problems God said somebody was interesting and I want to put up here because I think this has to do with I want to frighten you away from marriage just for a reason right first of all the ultimate trauma in life is divorce Malachi 2:16 says what read it out loud together I hate divorce says the Lord God of Israel and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his common says the Lord Almighty not as he tries divorce with violence why because divorce is a violent act when you borned with another person bonding is a dangerous word bonding is like shooting webs at each other like a spider web every time you speak to someone you shoot a web every time you listen to you they get a web and the more you talk to someone the more webs are created and then the deeper the conversation gets the thick of the web's become if I say to you a good morning you say good morning but there's a web there's a born between us but it's a very shallow born if ice if I say to you good morning how are you doing and how's your family that's a little deeper bond I'm entering your life now and if I ask you okay how is your children how's your oldest child now I'm getting into a deeper bond and then I get if I get the questions like what do you want to do with your life the next 20 years that's a deeper bond I'm prying into your destiny now what what are the things that really hurt you the most in your life that's a deeper bond see and you got to be careful who you bond with and what questions you axe because there's certain relationships you got to keep them at the thin level you don't want to get too deep like if you married you got to be careful which you acts are the people of the opposite sex because you don't want certain bonds if we can connected or created if you're not serious about a relationship don't get into deep questions because people start bonding with you sometimes Union people say well you know I just took out for lunch I took him out for dinner and we were chatting and all of a sudden II think I like him that depends on what you're talked about this is serious you understand this you start talking to principal but what are you what are your dreams for the next five years right okay you telling me you want to get at a deeper level in my life that's a serious bond you want to connect I mean you know you are no see now you push it you you getting down into some thick ribs and once those words get thick night and that's why I marriage is so dangerous because marriage is not just bonding mentally and socially and psychologically and and and you know and emotionally but you get now into physical bonding which is sex and that's a deep bond because now I gave you myself and divorce is trying to break that bond all those bonds and and you can never break a bond if you are bonded at that level and some time is it not even marriage you might be good going along with someone for five years you have been you know close to each other and you've been courting or every quarter for five years there's some thick bones in there you you you isolated yourself from other people to bond with this person so then bonds are deep and you decide you can break it off it ain't that simple it's almost like a marriage and you cannot break a bond you can't even cut it you have to tear it and that is called a broken heart a broken heart is bleeding bonds they are open wounds they are they were they were ripped from your emotions from your psyche from your spirit and that's why relationships are very dangerous you don't want to to develop at the level that you can't be responsible for that's why God does I hate divorce divorce is traumatizing its the ripping of two people's bones apart no lawyer can give you a divorce impossible no judge can give you divorce impossible when they give you a piece of paper they cannot give you an emotional divorce that's why when you leave the classroom all hell breaks I mean when when you leave and when you leave the courtroom rather all hell breaks loose after that for months because it ain't as simple as you thought and the kids are involved the bond said twice as thick so he's saying before you even get into marriage think about this can I handle the rippy can I handle wounds that last for ten years I'm still licking them and then every time I see this place in the food store some blood comes out again and I see them in the scooping of the kids the blood you know there's this do you want that trauma or would you rather just be happy until you find the right person that you ain't never don't get divorce from that's what he's talking about that's the violence part of it it's it's violent to get a divorce and some of you divorce in the room no time talking about it is violent you know it upsets your life for years and so the question is why does God hate it you hate it because there's no cure for the broken heart no pill you can take for a broken heart and some of y'all tried you could drink all the key you want when it wears off your heart still broken that's the way it works it that's why God hates divorce because the wound that it creates cannot be healed by medication matter of fact the Bible says the only thing that can heal a broken heart doesn't give the only one thing on earth that can heal it only one it says and Jesus spoke these words he said the Spirit of God is upon me watch him now he says and he has anointed me and he listed some things but he separated one of me says to heal the brokenhearted you can only survive a broken heart with a personal encounter with Jesus nothing else he says you could take all the fens 'ok you want tylenol drink liquor take drugs whatever you want when it wears off you still curtain only he can fix that it's that it is that bad God says I hate divorce but he doesn't hate the divorcee so you are loved my dear you've been through a rough life it's been tough but it's okay he still loves you he never wants you to experience that thing again that's why a single seminar is so important again my purpose for this few minutes is to talk you out of the other marriage I want you to settle in try to look let me not rush into this thing anymore let me settle into being single right now because some of you're coming here looking for someone I know we can looking looking listen calm down he nothin wrong with that but you know that's not your priority right now yeah divorce is tragic because divorce is the death of relationship it's actually a death and the same thing that happens when a family member dies happens to you when you get divorce the same emotional problems the same psychological experience it's the same because something died it's traumatizing and so you go to the very same experiences it's just like physical death because divorce is dead but auto burial that makes it worse than a physical death when someone dies you can always bury them and get rid of them right go to the crazy I put him in the hole put some flowers on and go home and never go back the problem is our divorce you buried a person but you keep seeing them at the food store you pump to the gas station oh my god here we go again you know you got to pick up this just to do the school pick up oh my god there's a person so they keep resurrecting and every time to resurrect the pain hits again that's worse than death so you don't want to have that kind of life for rest of your life it's it's very very tough and that's why God says he hate for anyone to experience divorce now why do we talk about that because it's impossible to get a divorce unless you are married so I'm building something here the greatest and most horrific trauma is divorce it's worse than physical death but you can't experience it unless you are married so marriage is the prerequisite for divorce it's impossible to get a divorce without marriage and marriage therefore is only possible we're two single people get together so you can see the connection here if you don't want to experience a divorce you don't get married if you don't want to get married you stay single now if you get married as two single people you get marriage now if it doesn't wake he heading toward the divorce court so the foundation of all of that is singleness and that's why being single is the most important pursuit in life Matthew 19 one of my favorite statements jesus said these words that they asked Christ a question is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and what every sin as the Bohemians now but if it was for any reason you look at me funny I'm gaining the courtroom you burned the food forget that that's it I'm you it's out you that's it you know people just kidding it was all kind of stuff today he answered them haven't you read that at the beginning the creator made them male and female he ignored the question I went back to the recipe they accent but divorce he went back to something different he went back to male and female he said divorce is not the problem divorce is a symptom something went wrong with the product that fell apart and the product fell apart because the ingredients that we used were not right do you see the connection divorce comes from marriage marriage come from male and female he says if you're a divorced issue it's because if you go down to the lowest denominator something was wrong with the ingredients if your cake is salty what happened come on tell me people saw that before you bake it in other words it indicate don't blame the cake it's what you put in the cake so the ingredients determine the product we keep wanting the perfect cake and putting a lot of salt in the flour let me mix it we keep expecting success when we are building with failure we want perfection with defects somehow we think that a miracle happens at the altar you know that slow sign shoes and then big that big white dress we figure man that person got to be perfect that dress look too nice sometimes the greatest case is coming down the aisle or sometimes the biggest demon is waiting there with and you smile all your way up to the demon [Applause] and your father who loves you hands you over [Applause] [Music] [Applause] yeah nothing changes in that church nothing what came in goes out with you that's life so he says well he says the problem is something went wrong at the foundation level the male and female was contaminated he said something was not right with the individual with the singles so he took it back to the singles he said God didn't make marriage first he said he said marriage God in the parties not God's main issue Gausman issue is male and female he said that's what God began with so he placed the priority red belongs and he says for this recent should a man leave his mother and father and be united to his wife and the two shall become one flesh would recent the word there is beginning male and female go back and find out what kind of male and female God used in the beginning that's what makes the thing work so any male after chapter 3 of Genesis and any male female HfG Genesis you got to pray hard because you got yourself a fallen male on a corrupted female and you still want God's perfect product that's what he's talking about you saying look God and stop it the junkie guys are y'all a junk you you're going to come back and get fixed up first then try God's product again mmm and this is why we need to come to the manufacturer not to be religious you need to get fixed because if you don't get him to fix you you gonna fix somebody when you marry them unless you got the people in your life they cause you more heartache than anyone could imagine you like the place will love you beating you up it's confusing so here's the issue then your marriage is only as good as your singleness write that down people come to me all the time I want you to pray for my marriage I'm sitting there going now let's see which one do I need to pray for huh or him because marriage ain't a problem you in the merit you if it ain't working you are part of this equation a lady came in town she says the devil is in my marriage I say yep you're right the two of them you bring to the marriage which you are as a single no more no less so don't walk around pretending that this you know this thing is his father hold this listen even in relationships I'm not talking about let's jump back from marriage and let's go by get to relationships can you are you meet somebody and you'll have interests in each other but listen it's still the same thing whatever you bring the relationship that's what it is where the other person break that's what it is it ain't no mystery in this so you don't you know you don't think well because we come together then there can be something better that we create no whatever you are that's what you create so it's more important for you to make sure you bring the best to the relationship which means that you got to become the best before you bring the best so you focus on yourself to become the best so that when you work on working you're together someone you bring the best contribution to them a lot of people are defects not assets they will devalue you by association they will destroy your value so here's what I think marriage is like an omelet it's only as good as the eggs I always say this because I think it gives us a clearer picture no matter how much you want to humble it to work it's only as good as the eggs in it so you can pray over an omelet all you want it depends on the eggs you use omelets are determined by quality of the eggs marriage is like the omelet it's already together so the question is what made this omelet I tell y'all about an experiment experiment I did years ago but or my mom firstly with everyone I intentionally took an egg and I took a pin and I cracked at the top of it in the hole because when you crack an egg put a hole in it bacteria get inside and it rottens the egg I didn't know egg smell so stink until that day it's the Fowler scent you want to smell because an egg is actually a dead animal so I cracked this egg and it was steak I put a refrigerator you couldn't smell it in it but it was still cool I was shocked to find out that the good egg was completely overtaken by the rotten egg and the omelet was completely stink [Music] you'll get a revelation yet no matter how good you are if the other person has cracks in their character bacteria in their emotions they got germs in their psychology and they smell in their room when you crack with them they win somehow we get this idea that after we get married I'm going to change this person doesn't work does it no so the best thing to do is don't crack at all don't be unequally yoked up with other people but here's the worst part of the egg once you have an omelette you can never get eggs again and that's the ripping part you can never be separated like you was do you know that folks in the from Wadi Wars are still carrying them all marriage with them it's phase with you your history is you God gives counsel so that you can enjoy your memories comprende when God gives you an instruction or a command he may even give you a warning he's really protecting your memory so God says do not fornicate that means don't have sex with anybody you ain't in covenant with in marriage now he doesn't explain a lot he's protecting your memory there are some things right now that you wish you could forget and they're not pleasant high school College sorry I didn't mean to take you back there but because it I'm saying it so when God says don't do certain thing he love you so much you don't want your memories to be a problem he wants to enjoy your memories because he knows what kind of creature he made you carry your life with you so make sure it's one that you want to carry so here's my big question you want people to marry you all the time but he has a question you ever asked yourself if you knew all you know about you would you marry you think about it I mean think about what you know about you the secret stuff you do it the private things no one knows about it's amazing how me we want people just take this thing with them take me home to you with you but what is you know what is you what is this I'm getting here would you marry you at all those habits you get spitting in the basin body brushing your teeth snow or massive is fit I mean you want someone to live with that your bad bread in the morning Jesus lord have mercy you take this breath home baby take it home you know what you can take it home and you see you know humans are strange they always look good in public look how nice you dress I wonder how you look at 2:00 a.m. in the morning I don't know you take your shoes off just take my shoes with you baby take my my tojon home with you maybe maybe just take it for granted folks wanted Mario's are you the kind of person that I can enjoy living with for 90 years think about it prepare yourself to do that for someone some people don't pain I'm not talking to you now then nothing not in this room I know them they not in this room I'm sure that but when they pass you you can smell their glory follows them and they want you to marry them what do you have that I could live with forever and that's what we asked people to do so take care of your life first matter of fact here's another question could you live with you for the rest of your life I think that's why he trying to find someone but you can't handle it this is too much burden for me I gotta share this mess with somebody else but we never think about these things doing me like hey you know you love me you will love me I promise you will love me - take me home forever no they won't that's ten people's lives up are you a gift or are you a curse [Music] are you a promotion to me are you a demotion what what is it that you have that will improve my life stay single until you get it all sorted out because that's what singing this is it's about finding yourself here's one to remember and I call this myth you know this submit people think that being single is a bad thing but it's not a singles problem that you have it's being single that's your problem in other words we we we use this term single we throw it around don't even know what it means and I said I'm tired being single you ain't never been single let me say it again you say I'm tired being single I'm telling you you ain't never been single all your being is unmarried they're different you want to be single you don't want to stop being single so we confuse the two we we think that that our problem is that we're not we're not married well you're right never confused singable being alone the word alone means to be exclusive that means you're all the only one of your kind that's not true there are lot of males other females in the world so you're not alone now you might be lonely if you're never alone loneliness is a sign of a problem matter of fact singleness is a state to be pursued not avoided and to be single should be the goal of even the married person because it is the single this that keeps you marriage together it's a paradox let's see how that works the principle issue is being unmarried not being single never confused unmarried with being single a lot of people think that they are single you know there's something from singleness or something no you son from unmarried yes whatever that is what it is in other words we what we really mean is we want to get married doesn't believe let me say I tie it being single what we're saying is I want to get married you're using the wrong terminology and that's why we're confused because you get married and then you will never single and your marriage is a disaster because it is singleness that makes the marriage possible marriage is two whole people coming together if you are not a whole person and I'm a whole person and you marry me you can be a parasite you're gonna suck me to death it's like the life out of me because you ain't you you are not complete so you can use me to try to become complete you're no longer a blessing you are a burden now you suck my life out of me I'm there people who you know this is happening to right now the spouse is sucking their life out of them because they got defects they lack so much most married people have never been single and that is why unmarried is a state while singleness is a disposition you are in the state of not being married right now if you are not married as a state you are in but saying this is different it's not a state it's a disposition it is it is an assessment of your entity Who I am and most people have never achieved that before they get married so here's what I always say it's okay to be single but not okay to be alone the first thing God found that was wrong with Adam was it was alone God never told him it's not good to be single out of a single he was complete and hold didn't need it matter of fact the proof that Adam was whole and single was the fact that God had to decide that he needed to mate let me say it slow the proof that Adam was completely single was evidenced by the fact that Adam didn't even know he needed anybody God made the decision Genesis 2:18 God said it is not good for this man to be alone Adam had no complaint he never talked to God about it the guy was having so much fun naming animals walking on the water and talking to trees the guy was having fun he was taking over that garden dominating I mean he was in his purpose he was on the groove he was moving and God says I like this guy he needs to share this with somebody relationships are for sharing your victories and success with not to bring on new burdens and depression I mean let's be honest let's be honest if you know somebody is stupid dumb operative I mean frustrating they us they they they they they got all kind of disease in their bodies they didn't miss would you marry them but you do you just don't know until it's too late [Music] we need to think about the fact that we're not really having on a loan problem God made another human to solve their own problem but he never questioned Adams wholeness Adam is completely single so Jesus that they did they no longer two but one what God is trying to get him a man put asunder anyone who divorce his wife except for territory of course marriage another woman commits adultery and disciples said unto Him if this is the situation between a husband and wife is better not to marry Peter James and John said my God if that's the standard you might as well stay unmarried they heard something that frightened them and I want to frighten you with it too if marriage is that dangerous let me stay on there for a while let me make sure I get this right life is too short for you to miss the first time hit it right the first time after all you little bit too all right now you come forward to try it an error you will hit this thing right the first time say Amen if you agreed me yeah you don't want to know you know no trial and error here matter of fact when you'll get married I want you to call me I won't do the ceremony and one one of the vowels gonna be and I will not experiment with you this is it you leave me because I killed you Lord I take that back woah look at how he closes the thing he said Jesus said look she said not everyone can accept this word about marriage only those whom it has been what given nothing with not everybody can handle this standard it tough to become single take your time because if you jump before you are completely whole and separate and unique you got problems not everybody is ready for this he says and it goes on to say some even have become this way because they were born that way they don't want it on interested knee wrong with them they just don't want of any you know covenant between anybody just want to enjoy everybody have a good time and fulfill God's will but they're happy that's fine you don't got to be no nun to do that just decide I don't wanna get married ain't nothin wrong with that you want to put your energies in God's work and to help humanity and people do it all the time as a eunuch for helping nations others have renounce marriage because of what the kingdom of heaven some of them understand and look I want to serve God's kingdom and this is what I want to do and I need all my time to do it I can't share my time with nobody so that's a decision you can make and nothing wrong with that and look at it Jesus is recommending it actually so marriage is not a requirement to fulfill God's will so don't you feel pretty you go to here tomorrow I don't want to feel no pressure at all another body pressure you it's okay to be who you are right now and enjoy every minute of it the last party says the the one who can accept this let them accept it can't do it don't touch it so yes I want to close on singing this is the most important state of human development singleness is the foundation of God's human family he only made one human and everyone came of that one human God began this human race with one person not a couple sometimes we think that marriage is God's foundation of the human race that's not true he only made one person at the bottom a single person so God began all human relationships with a single person here's why that's important what he's telling us is every relationship begins with the single so you determine what happens in our relationship and I hate ever happens in our relationship the single qualities of those people so it's important you to focus on singleness and not try to create relationships without first building who you are garbage is images likeness he made of male and female and we have all these wonderful truths here the foundation of the human race is really a single person so the most important people in the world are those sitting in this room who are unmarried they're the most important and they determine what's going to happen to us in the future as a country and as a community and this is why all humans must begin a relationship with the single what's the quality of your life I encourage you to spend the next two days in every session coming to open up yourself to tap into what does it mean to be single because I have a definition in my book out there which you'll be happy to autograph for you if you buy it on singles the definitions would save me I got married to my wife we've been married for 31 years sitting over there and our key to our marriages are singing it the way you measure if you're single is whether you need to be married if you don't need to be married you're probably ready to be married get it yeah see we week sometime people make us feel guilty if you're not interested in marriage but you're the perfect candidate for marriage if you don't need to be married because you are obviously close to being home because it means that you are having a good life all by yourself and that's a sign of wholeness foulness made I don't need nobody to become somebody I'm somebody all bye come on somebody good with media see singing this means hey I don't need you to approve me I don't need you to make me feel important I don't need you to tell me how good I am because I know I could at this in other words wholeness means I am free from needing you that's why I am good for you because I'm not coming to take from you it's a mystery isn't it so if you need to be married you are dangerous if someone come here says I love you I don't don't you ever leave me run they said you know ever since you came into my life my life has been changed and you know I just want to thank God for you they get really spirit you know I want to thank God for you I prayed for you all my life and boy I'm so glad you answered all my prayer you know what what is the different pressure on you those people are sick and get a Western once with them prophecies you know the Lord told me that I was going to marry you you know I got a dream last night and the Lord spoke to me and says that any guy his name would be G Harlan and I'm listen stop lying if you'd like the fella telling that but don't lie and prophecy God doesn't choose any one for you he gives you a brain and a power choice you analyze them figure them out then choose and whatever you wake up in the morning with that's yours God look at you say for you you're in trouble God won't take your burden on for himself you will never do that yeah so this is what I want to define where this word alone means all in one and God separated Adam so that Adam could have someone to share with and that was the bottom line of that so this is where we get our definition from born-again single means that you are now focusing on these three things to become whole whole means first to be separate separate means you are apart detached and differ from everybody else this is important a lot of people are not this yet they are 50 years old and still not separate they always need people around them to feel important they need people always in their company did matter of fact they hate to be by themselves because they are bad company to themselves separate means I am NOT my brother I am NOT my sister I am different from my friends and don't try to make me over I am me leave me alone I am separate from all your that's important because that's a part of your value the second one is what unique unique means I am original I've discovered that I have a distinct quality a distinct design by God I am NOT like anybody my fingerprint is unmatched anywhere and ain't nobody could be like me and I can't be like nobody leave me alone I like Who I am I am unique I am different from you I am special do you believe that about yourself yet and the last one is what hold the hold is a tough one big hold means that you are completing yourself you are unified with yourself all of yourself your body your mind your spirit are all connected you are in love with your whole self it also means that you are one with yourself that means you don't need anyone to complete you this is so important especially in the Bahamas culture where we've been taught that this is my better half well that's a dangerous statement it's my better half let's see me figure this out now okay I'm half she's half so I was half all these years so now when I meet her we both hold and so what happens is I try to make sure I take as much from you as possible to become hold you try to take as much from me as possible to become whole so for 30 years you keep fighting trying to rob each other of each other and that's why when we get a divorce you jump up the bridge or you can't go to work or you become insane why because you have a person listen relationships supposed to be two holes coming into the connection to each other if you and I are hold I was trying to find a glass that was to my glass and water thingy but but if you are hole let me tell you what the beautiful it might seem my wife it's just worked for us my wife doesn't need me and that's good for me and she I don't need her we really don't we can live apart we'll be happy okay now watch this but we decide by covenant to live together now if I'm home so I'm going to measure myself make her like a glass of water okay I'm full come baby sandy all right now my wife is standing next to me and she's also full cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo all right so we have two full people totally full that means whatever I do for her is not because I trying to get something why cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo I'm full whatever she does for me it's not because she needs something from me what goo goo goo goo goo goo she's full so whatever I give her is overflow it's me saying look I don't need nothing I just want to do this because I want to do this love is a decision to share with someone but she is helpful and I'm half full Oh goo goo goo goo then I can turn it upside down I'm far inside of me goo goo goo goo goo goo goo and put her back bomb but wrong with her MT she's in baby she grabbed me goo goo goo goo goo what's wrong with me now empty for 30 years we keep fighting each other trying to become whole because we're not saying oh yeah how coming into my life is an overflow you don't love someone because you need something from them I need a mind I better stop right there i'ma drink some water thank you take it out yeah [Music] come together all right so Tommy Jane Cedric meet Maybelline Junior Miss Bessie Mae whatever you wanna call it now Junior say I love you Bessie say I love you too let's get together good why cuz I am gonna be your better half I want you to fulfill me so Junior say okay so now Bessie Mae is full she's happy Junie got problems should you say what about me so he get my heart you take yourself back and what happened now she half empty so he say use water fulfill me too so now Bessie got problems she unfulfilled feel empty in this marriage so she get mad mad mad wait give me my self back buddy what we get in marriage is this big fight going on constantly constantly is frightened hey but if two of these are full and they meet each other whatever he gives her his overflow whatever she gives him his overflow and if he decide to leave her she still I rest my case so this is the secret to a good relationship it's not the other person is making sure you are becoming what are they you are whole when you don't need anybody to approve anything for you to feel good you need people's approval you got problems take your girlfriend shopping with you right you'll go downtown go in the mall you put on this dress you like this dress you put it on you come out of the dress in the fitting room what you think and she go now and you go how do you think so - ciao and you go take it off you lie and you like the dress your whole person you like the dress you buy the dress if she don't like the dress that's her problem it's your body and your money that's a whole person you ain't dressing for her but it's a sign that you are sick still see and most of the songs we sing our songs of defective eggs oh I'll be in I thought y'all were saved man in otherwise you telling this girl that if she leaves you he'll be in trouble that means you tie your entire peace and sanity to another person you are sick if you leave me now you take away the deep is far [Applause] oh boy you're another whole thing I mean the sound sounds so good put in satanic what you mean if you leave me now you think no no child you leave me care yourself I keep it what I got I'm a whole Stevie Wonder you are the sunshine of my life that's why I always stay around okay that's fine so use the sunshine in my life that means before you came I was in darkness and when you leave I can be in darkness again so I can't let you live you can manipulate me anytime it's a sign that I'm not home so I tell people look the way supposed to be look I'm a son use the Sun let me get together we form a constellation baby sounds together now if you decide to leave I have some brother like me no problem I still got my own sunshine I'm a whole person hmm Shawn chapter one the last two verses changed my life it says and Jesus the people followed him and said you are wonderful you are great you are powerful they began to talk to him all these good things and the next verse says but Jesus did not believe anything they said because he knew what was in every man he didn't need man's approval of him for that was beautiful stuff come on give my hand hey that changed my life as a teenager and I'm still that way if you don't like me that's your problem use your energy some other way don't try to dislike me because I like me before I met you if you're full you can be a blessing but if you have a person everybody's in trouble because you now are a leech you're sucking on people you just sucking up that's why I moved from leadership to relationship to relationship is a sign that you are sick you are just sucking on people trying to find yourself trying to complete yourself by sucking other people sucking other people and sucking them to death some people are married and they are sick and and sickly and and they s depressed why they live with someone who's a parasite for 25-30 years man suck them emotionally suck them psychologically suck them financially something physically man and it's like you know god please kill them for me on top of that that's not close with this loneliness is magnified by marriage if you are not complete marriage will expose it can I say it again it's very important all your defects will show up in marriage so you think you okay now get married so you want to focus on yourself right now you want to say let me develop myself let me enhance myself let me read books let me focus on my intellectual development my spiritual development now my physical development let me get my hygiene sorted out hygiene let me get my my vision sorted out let me decide what I want to do with my my future let me get my preference define why because I want to make sure that when I bump into opportunity I'm not a parasite also we need yep so I hope that you open up your spirit and and and this week the reason why I have a single seminars and next year we plan even a bigger one it's so that you can be around people just like you let me tell you why if you stay with me for the next five years I guarantee if you stay with me if you a hold you can be hold like here's a good part of that by the time next three years come along they can grow to about 2,000 people no problem and all them in the room whole guess what that means for you plenty to pick from child right now I know it tough cause you're gonna find as much so what I'm gonna do I'm a create them for you you've got a hammer fix this up we can make this big time you you can walk in a place say let's see which one I want cuz all them hold anything you calm this because they've been through the process same and now yeah Marcus the stuff you got around you I know man all kind of parasites all over the place tough to find a real plant parasites everywhere that's why some of your live married yet because you can't find a replant and you know and that hurts me because y'all is so good you're a good people look at this young lady good woman I can shoot next year in the name of Jesus people people need choices that are quality I would tell him by the creek on ready lady rope and thing in our Facebook she said she said you know it's so difficult to fire I don't trust no man no more cos you know I'd get hurt and so I said look if you shop it in a store and you can't find what you're looking for go to another store that means you got to move around a little bit you know come to more events like this you bump into futures and you see what's important to is you want to bump into people who are going where you go in if they go in toward wholeness and you meet them you on the same road so you don't want to be picking up all kind of junk and then try to make something out of it it's just too much hard work you know it's hard work that's why I'm proud of you being are you being here tonight man make me so proud of it and I guess it guess what now I'm tell you now if your boyfriend here with you Griffin here with you boy hey glad for you all tonight because you're getting information you can't pay for come on claps or no one can look at you yeah ah that's too much stuff okay I just wanted to repeat this before we go everyone read the number one read when you're single yes you can do read mind you time number two number three number four number five - number six number seven manage your 8 number 9 number 10 number 11 and number 12 that's what you can do when you are single you can't do none of them when you married because now you get distraction so don't use your time looking for somebody use your time becoming somebody some people are so busy looking for who they want they ain't got time to be who they are so when they do find who they're looking for they ain't got no one to give them let me say it slow we're so busy looking for someone we want when you don't have time to become who we are so when we do find a person we were looking for we are have no one to give them if you hate nobody and you marry me guess what I married so you've got to become somebody your value you

Channel: Munroe Global

Views: 277,299

Rating: 4.8952336 out of 5

Keywords: myles munroe, dr myles munroe, munroe, munroe global, motivational, inspirational, motivation, inspiration, kingdom, leadership, purpose, character, speaker, author, consultant, bahamas, nassau bahamas, the bahamas, food for thought, educational, learning, self help, personal development, album, speakers, teach me, planning and change, crisis, Azusa, conference

Id: 5JG0S9jTp78

Length: 68min 14sec (4094 seconds)

Published: Tue Jun 20 2017