The Hidden Children of the Catholic Church | Foreign Correspondent

[Music] for years it's been an open secret as long as you have priests you will have children or Catholic priests Catholic priests who've broken their vow of celibacy to become fathers I knew he was a priest when I was a child but I couldn't tell them that I knew because it was a big secret we talked to the children who've been pressured to stay quiet and suffered in silence this is just the tip of the iceberg what we know at the moment I think priests children is a great one to be acknowledged they won't see be on the map they exist they're not collateral damage some are speaking out for the very first time and I can just remember rocking going I can't tell anyone I can't tell you when I have to keep the secret [Music] [Music] when Catholics seek answers they look to the Vatican the seat of power and decision-making for the church for generations if questioned about children of priests the church said they don't exist and if they do they're an exception [Music] it's hard to say how many children of priests there are around the world there could be thousands you might have heard about it but believe me they're talking about it behind these walls we're on a journey to uncover the secrets of the children who've been silenced for years [Music] we're going to the very top to get some answers and to understand the depth of the hurt and the scale of the problem this has been a very big deal hasn't it for the church yes yes we'll speak to children of priests in a number of countries but we start our journey at home the tourist guides boasts that Mount Gambier in South Australia offers unforgettable experiences and unique memories but it's where this story starts for a woman who is missing a lifetime of memories [Music] Linda lawless has spent the last few years delving into her past hoping for answers to the questions about who she is Linda is searching for her biological father so you gathered all of this together and what does it tell you nothing adding up more questions like I just not getting any answers and it's just getting more and more confusing when Linda was 8 she made her first holy communion and a family secret was revealed that was the same year I found out that my dad wasn't my real dad so I was a big gear the devastating discovery about her stepfather not being her dad hit harder when her mother admitted she'd almost had her adopted at birth it was such a scandal to be home where mother she was very ashamed so she went to Sydney to have me and she I was to be adopted out from Sydney this is a photo of my mum that was taken on the manly beach after I was born always reminded me of what I didn't know and the unanswered questions and what did she go through but at the very last minute Linda's mum decided to keep her newborn and take her home to Melbourne leaving unfinished paperwork Linda always knew there was more to the story but never thought she could ask her mother she used to have a look of fear on her face and you just knew in the end not to go there there was something about it that was just don't go there it wasn't until after both her parents died that she felt she could start looking she used the skills she developed as a part-time genealogist to investigate her own family history so all of this you are hoping was gonna bring clues yes and it's only given me more questions I stand a person to be good has a family name my certificate doesn't have that I don't have a surname I am still Linda Katherine nobody a DNA test came back giving him more information than she'd ever expected a strong match to a family called Kelly her aunt's reaction gave her the next piece of the puzzle and I just said - I said I do know one thing though I said I'm a Kelly and there was dead silence and next thing I heard her going oh my god oh my god she said I don't know how to tell you that she said but he's a cosmic priest [Music] Linda's aren't revealed how father Joseph Kelly was a great family friend back in the 60s he'd often visit the house and take Linda's mother and her sisters on picnics and day trips a romance blossomed with Linda's mum who was nearly 20 years younger than him they said he was a nice man but they said he was a charmer and he knew exactly what he was doing when I found out who my father was the stigma became even bigger again and I remember thinking I can't tell anybody I now have to carry the secret I realize from over a period of time that I can't keep the secret and I need to step forward [Music] Linda's been using social media to try to find out more about her father father Joe Kelly she wants recognition from the Catholic Church and she's discovered support for her quest from the other side of the world [Music] it's in Highland the children of priests are finding their greatest advocate thousands are using the internet and easier access to DNA testing to discover the truth about their parentage [Music] in the little village of Arda to the west of Dublin I'm meeting the man who's bringing them all together [Music] III think this as a child Vincent Doyle spent nearly every weekend here at the parochial house with father JJ the man he believed to be his Godfather it all seems so much bigger and I said when I came here first Isaac used to be better over the priests that know you used to be smaller JJ was parish priest here at the time and Vincent thought the world of him is amazing childhood with this man who spoke Greek Latin he traveled and you know we're in the context of Ireland at that time that was quite unique and there was a huge kindness to him it was a father and everything but the word JJ died when Vincent was 12 and it wasn't until he was 28 that he finally found out the truth JJ was his biological father sure tell me and she wanted me to know but to me I mean that was the antidote to the worst day of my life that I have lost him because that day I got him back I spoke to people afterwards about it and I thought I had this big thing where to hear this and they were like yeah we're kind of new and I was like I never knew but accept me even though it was now in the open people didn't want Vincent to talk about it all these little phrases it's a matter of privacy discretion what were they really trying to say shut up keep quiet bury this Vincent Doyle did the exact opposite he decided he'd set up a website which would help others in a similar situation he called it coping children of priests international I got a few months I was like there's all these countries logging on there was hits and Google search phrases and graphs and it took off thirteen and a half thousand people who come forward out of 175 countries what does that say to you it says that there's a math need there's people looking globally for information on this issue why would thirteen and a half thousand people in 175 countries go onto a search engine on the internet and type in things like my father's a Catholic priest alimony for priests kids help I am pregnant and the father is a Catholic priests no one knows for sure how many children of priests there are but Vincent has made his own estimates we know of 10,000 I could stand before Christ and set my knob 10,000 children are priests that's conservative that's very conservative [Music] Vincent realized that children of priests all share a common frustration that the church wants to keep them silent he's determined to go to the very top and demand recognition ultimately I'm waiting for one thing I want the pulp to say the word children of priests that's what I want and that will just be the beginning a loving relationship like Vincent oil had with JJ is exceptional for children of priests more often the experience damages the child [Music] in this peaceful English country village I'm gonna meet a woman who knows better than anyone the trauma children of priests go through I think it nearly killed me to be honest I think I internalized the hurt to the point where I'd stopped looking after myself [Music] I feel each what's in place Sarah Thomas is a mum now herself she still finds it hard to accept how her own mother was treated by her father a trainee priest when she told him she was pregnant he went in her words berserk and dumped her on the spot basically and sort of hid behind a more senior priest who in the end masterminded a plan of secrecy to stop her ever telling me anything about him they offered financial support but only if she kept his identity secret their intimidation worked for a while but eventually Sarah's mother told her that her father was a Catholic priest and at 14 Sarah wanted to meet her father the fact that he was biological father to me was what interested me and I was convinced that if he met me he would be thrilled and once he and sort of sad that he'd missed out on those years but really make up for it the reality was very different seeing him come into the room very cold I felt very full of shame and self-loathing that I was the object of his shame and that other wasn't anything I could do at that point I had to sort of sit this meeting out knowing from his actions and how he was speaking that it would never go anywhere that encounter started a spiral into darkness Sara drank too much and partied too hard to try to blank it all out I was injured in an accident when I was 20 and I had so many multiple injuries that I was in the hospital for a long time but it was almost like having a second chance at life I'm not gonna let my life be at all ruined by this but at the same time I've got a steady flow of creative rage what happened and what's happening right now to other priests children instead of turning away from her nightmare she decided to face it she's doing a PhD studying children of priests and has looked at how their experience compares with children who've been sexually abused her research is throwing up some startling similarities there are patterns and themes very large percentage of my participants feel the shame and stigma and the silencing that they've received from the church in communities has contributed towards huge mental distress I was absolutely staggered when I started analyzing my data to find that 56% of my participants heard either attempted suicide or had suicide ideation that are hugely high [Music] through Vincent's website coping international Sara and Linda lawless have forged a friendship and now talk regularly and offer one another support have you found out anything more yeah have you met any new people yeah fantastic oh that's amazing [Music] in London I'm gonna meet a group of people who've been brought together by coping they're starting to form a community and I'm joining their regular catch-up at the local pub I knew he was a priest when I was a child but I couldn't tell them that I knew because it was a big secret I found out so I'm the youngest of five children they're all the children of my parents and I was in my 20s when I found out that actually my natural father is my godfather who was a Roman Catholic priest Joe and Michael stories are forming part of Sarah's research their friendship has helped them unlock a lifetime of secrets but actually it's more the emotional side when you hear other people talk about the guilt because you feel guilty even though it's not your guilt you know that shame that secrecy that when I focus what was for me the game changer well you know most of the people around it they're all dead there's only a handful of people now but you still feel a little bit guilty for talking we're talking about yeah yeah okay I still feel shame and stigma even researching it and speaking publicly about it and it's something that I have to battle every day really with coping you know we've been able to get together with people and you know you can see it we're mirrors for each other and you know you can see things from a different perspective and you know you realize that you're not alone the big concern is how to help the next generation of children of priests do you hold out any hope that the church will recognize you guys is that what you want I don't I don't care what the catholic church thinks of me or but i but i care about as i say that those children now therefore it is really important that the church is an institution recognizes that there are children of priests and that there still children and Brittany children of priests want the church to be more active on their behalf and it's back in Ireland where they may have the best chance of that [Music] I've been coming to Ireland for over a decade and I can barely recognize the place on gay marriage on abortion on issues that were once dominated with what the church said that's no longer the case there's a real sense of progress here a momentum for change [Music] in a bid to reject the secrets and lies that have dominated church affairs in Ireland for centuries the Irish bishops are opting for openness Vincent got in the ear of Archbishop Dermot Martin one of Ireland's highest-ranking clerics and he came to tell me his his personal story about the fact that his father was a priest and that he was interested in in following up the question of the children of priests after Vincent's lobbying the Irish bishops hoped to fund his website and published guidelines for what should happen when a priest father's a child tell me about the Irish bishops guidelines the Archbishop's have produced guidelines which I think are reasonable guidelines just to say how you proceed on this there there there there is actually reasonable normal but I looked on some and soil is revolutionary and there's no need for them to be revolutionary it's just common sense in many ways and and basic common humanity maynooth is best known as the training ground for islands priests this is where the Irish bishops traditionally meet and where the guidelines were published or thank God for the Irish Catholic Bishops they're doing is something that is extraordinary absolutely [Music] the Irish Guidelines he pushed for put the welfare of the child first and treat each case individually they stopped short at asking the priest to step down earlier this year the Vatican admitted it has guidelines too but won't make them public Vincent's read them and can't see why not why would they make the guidelines public because if you've got a solution then you've got a problem but isn't the church's view that the priest has to leave no person man or woman should be forced from the job for becoming a parent how is that Christological how is that practical and yet people buy into this argument of congratulations you're a father you're fired this is what's driving the secrecy B's men our fathers my father all these men are terrified so you could still be a good priest and a father absolutely how can a child contradict a priest's love for God the Father Oh nor does he want the church to use celibacy as a distraction so what are we doing home we're talking about shadows who are we talking about the adult my opinion is this let's take care the kids first and I think the distracts from the kids whether knowingly or unknowingly is wrong [Music] the children of priests we've met are frustrated and how hard it is to get the church to acknowledge them I've come to Rome to find out why it's so hard for them to get answers they're the victims here they've done nothing wrong apart from be born and yet their very existence is a problem the Vatican can't or won't deal with at least not publicly [Music] I've managed to secure an interview with the Catholic Church but before that I asked a longtime Vatican watching Nicole Winfield what to expect a lot of the adult children of priests still feel that there's a meant secrecy about it all are you seeing a change at all in the response from the church it is still a taboo issue even though they've acknowledged that it's a problem it's evidence that priests are not doing what they're supposed to be doing and I think any time the church leadership is confronted with that the knee-jerk reaction is to recoil and and not be fully transparent about it but coming to Rome to seek answers we may well be disappointed do you think if you can get the guidelines all power to you I would love to see them I think a lot of people would like to see them over the last few decades the church has been damaged and disgraced by its cover up of the clerical sexual abuse scandal I'm wondering if it'll be more transparent in its dealings with children of priests aundrea Toni le is the editorial director of Vatican communications he's agreed to be the church's spokesperson why can't the guidelines be made public questa Lina guida nonsence a great mr. Doyle a patoot allegedly persona intercept a potrebbero Brendon a vision no to touch okay in turn ok non viene public ATO non vult earache Asya segreto so the real in a guida Perot intern a Perla congregatio knee it's a time to consider relaxing celibacy don't we encase in Chile but Ronan DOMA pero / - tu de pontificio dono precioso II Duke where Elena de la Quezon on a per Camby erequest allege cheetah mentor or neurology de cambiar a pill emotive Odell facto catchy son operatic a mentor Ananda feely then finally a moment the children of priests have been waiting for an acknowledgment of sorts this has been a very big deal hasn't it for the church yes yes no not totally unfortunately that's all he not only these there is because the abuse cases is really painful and it's it's important to change mentality but this is another one is in a different level but so painful for for people [Music] back in Australia Linda lawless journey to find out who she is and more about her father isn't over it's been a while since we first met have you been going yeah really good thanks been busy researching family members and different people and today I'm going to meet Peter FINA who was a friend of my father's how are you feeling I'm really excited about it to me he's the closest person that I've come across to him yet I've offered her a lift and a bit of moral support hi Linda to meet you after this time to you thank you so much okay today that's a greatly appreciated conversation on the phone I really found that very valuable and just to be here today and talk to you was lovely and - you know for you to take the time so I couldn't learn more about my father is it's gonna be really really good Peter Finn is a former Catholic priest who worked alongside Linda's father father Joseph Kelly was a priest here in the 60s Linda's mother lived close by sin bridges was where they would meet so Joe came down really to relieve and fill in yeah for another priest that I was with had gone on holiday so it was very interesting times really because I got to know Joe in that period quite well we we sort of hit it off really really quickly and really easily so that was that was great they are very well and even in my eulogy at his funeral I was able to say a lot of things good things but you've got a copy off but then now to realise there was another side to him which I didn't know certainly affected my fam yes yes myself of course so I feel you would feel free to ask me anything you want and I will talk about just it oh no that's okay special ROG it's okay for Linda remembering how hard it was for her mother and finally being able to talk to someone who knew her father it's a big step forward but it's a difficult one the past is different for each of the children of priests I've spoken to but they all want the same thing for the future freedom to speak openly the right to be heard and for the Catholic Church to treat them as individuals not symbols of their father's failure I'm not doing the lies in the secrecy anymore I'm not carrying that shame I have to set pastor [Music] [Applause] you [Music] you

Channel: ABC News In-depth

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Keywords: foreign correspondent, abc news indepth, children of priests, coping international, priests having affairs, priests babies, catholic priests, australian priests, priests celibacy history, celibacy catholic, priests having children, church recognising children of priests, catholic church scandal, catholic church history, lisa millar abc, church babies, celibacy, catholic, should priests be celibate, should priests be allowed to marry, abc news

Id: PADNmpeZEeM

Length: 29min 11sec (1751 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 24 2019