The Doctor Takes A Wife 1940 Ray Milland & Loretta Young

so buy it i'm telling you after you read it you won't even look at harry she's a bachelor girl too and they say this book answers everything is this the book that shows you how to put men in their place yes ma'am look at that harrison every female from six to sixty will make this a best seller and you're worrying about a measly printing bill oh well take a straight wire miss june cameron lakewood lodge lakewood mass dear june i hate to cut short your vacation but uh imperative that you return at once have great idea for the sequel please wire time of arrival good morning somebody take my bags please having an awful hurry would you mind well i guess i'll have to take him where's your car okay i'm not driving you know well what you should have how are you going to get to the depot well the same way i got here you've still got that station wagon haven't you oh yes yes well but sits up in town getting supplies you know we can't afford to stock in the way the big places do oh no naturally not nevertheless i've still got to get to the station and don't tell me you can't afford a station around here because i've got to get to new york sure if you left five minutes ago you could have made it if you're gonna tell me there's not another train out of here off train in the morning we used to have two trains a day since they stopped making shoes up north i don't care what they've stopped making up north i've got to get to new york and that's all there is to it i beg your pardon but would you mind lowering your voice i'm phoning a bigger pardon thank you what was that that's all the inefficient ill-organized places i've ever seen in my please this is a long-distance call well then why don't you phone from a booth this morning i don't need the phone from a booth if there were a booth this happens to be the only phone in the place and it's costing me money right all right i'm sorry yes i what did you say dad i said a radiogram just arrived from that friend of yours miss marilyn thomas her boat gets in at noon tomorrow and she sends you her love you know if you can't take people to the station then why didn't you build your hotel please be quiet if you were a gentleman you'd wait until i got your treatment finished no bell boys no service will you please stop this childish conversation i can't hear a word you have no right to monopolize the entire life i can do that oh oh i i thank your pardon are you hurt what are you trying to do just trying to get to new york that's all well i wish you luck thank you very much i um i'm awfully sorry i shouted at you like that oh i didn't mind but really you shouldn't get so excited it's bad for your nerve centers which way are you going new york oh that's very nice of you thank you very much hey but look here i i'm not too bothered tall i'll take care of my bags oh why would you put these in the car please oh so you got a ride after all yeah this is fine gentlemen's going to give me one but you got in here anyway hotel clerks i'll get off what's the best road to lakewood highway 44. if it was open of course there's route 32 but the mud's awful annoying after you that'll be a pleasure my good man good day [Music] uh have you got a cigarette don't well oh i think i've got some of my code right here [Music] trunk murderer no you know he's a spitting image of my uncle chester oh you're fond of him aren't you cost 250 i'm sorry do you mind turning that box up no not at all there you are uh you two always travel together i use them in my work [Music] i i i don't mean to cry into your private life or anything like that but uh just what is chester to you well i teach neuropsychiatry and i'm doing some research and migraine headaches the head opens up just what is your theory on migraines in case i get a headache blood vessels in the head delayed excessively due to excitement and overwork causing a pressure on the nerve centers oh yes we travel at much too fast a pace especially women because they are not equipped to uh take an equal place in the man's world i'm just what makes you think it's a man's world well there's an accepted fact that the male is a superior animal now in spite of what you and little chesty here may think the modern woman can match you men fiber for fiber and have a rib left over i think you read that somewhere i did in the most wonderful book called spinster's aunt spinach oh yes the chambermaid at the hotel had a copy oh did she another one with no forehead well you shouldn't read trash like that i didn't read it well it's just as well i wrote it oh i'm sorry that's all right that's quite all right i didn't expect you or any other man to enjoy it you know marriage is no longer the answer to a maiden's prayer oh slaving over a hot stove all day is all right for some of the more backward members of our sex but there's a new kind of woman coming into the fore kind that refuses to subordinate her personality to to that of the egotistical domineering male seems to me the amazon's tried it i forgot to send that wire would you please stop at the telegraph office uh miss i'd like to send this wire please [Music] hey kid you want to make a quarter sure well you take this and put it on the back of that car which one oh that one down there [Music] best regards june cameron that'll be 62 cents and three cents tax please very well june cameron oh just a minute oh i've read it three times i think it's simply wonderful we're glad you liked it would you want to graph it for me [Music] you have no idea what this book has done for me it's changed me into a career woman well i'm very good i used to feel awful when men didn't insult me but now i don't care anymore that's very nice cameron bye bye a traitor and of course you may resent the intelligent womb you're used to the clinging vine who inflates your ego 24 hours oh good evening george would you take my bags please by telling you what a wonderful man you are oh no they don't marry you for love they marry you for security the independent but frustrated female i wish you drop into my class sometime i'd like my students to see you miss cameron miss cameron miss cameron well wait a minute where do you think you're going where's my head no how do i know i i left it on the scene you did not you've got it i have not got it and will you please get out of here not until i get my head but i haven't got it can't be on miss cameron yes george yes that'll be all thank you very much hey that's my hat box give it to me give it to me you're no gentleman oh i'm awfully sorry it looked just like my hat box look what you've done you've broken the nose you pulled it right out of my head oh yes i forgot the career woman is never to blame i'd rather not discuss it anymore if you don't mind and will you please leave you know you're really a specimen for a clinic i am all the ungrateful females you force your way into my car i drive you 400 miles buy the gas and all buy you a hamburger you ruin a 250 head well you're not gonna need that part chester won't get a headache in his nose [Music] all right if that's the attitude you're going to take you can pay for it trip cost me exactly 9.80 you can pay half which is 4.90 why don't you run along correct some papers or something i'm very busy ordinarily i'm a very calm and peaceful individual that's because i've got thin earlobes and rather thick eyebrows but you see these they're thumbs short thumbs which means i'm stubborn and i'm not going to get out of here i get four dollars or 90 cents fortunately my thumbs show no evidence of the pygmy ancestors however i too can have my obstinate moments this is one of them well we might just want to make ourselves comfortable he might just as well you know that my first generous impulse was to give you a miserable 4.90 but since you've adopted this typical high-handed prussian attitude to the mail you you can just sit on those sawed-off digits until certain place freeze is over [Music] [Applause] we call it 75 cents which makes 4.15 [Music] silva nope well i'm sorry i'd like to give you more but i'm afraid the best i can do is uh which leaves three dollars and fifteen cents [Music] well 10 years old that's more than i can say for you [Music] despite take care of the balance let's be generous call it 40 cents a drink [Music] i'm wrong 20 cents [Music] mr pierce this is the morning express we just received word that june cameron got herself married how about the details married all right my dear fellow i'm afraid after midnight i lose my sense of humor if june cameron married anybody i'd be the first to know about it because it would probably be me i can't blame you for trying to keep it quiet i know that wedding bells means curtains for that bestseller of ours i extend my condolences but the other papers will have it in a couple of hours and i mean to beat them to it but this is ridiculous oh man well i tell you only a short while ago i received a wire from her and she never mentioned a word about it hold on a moment yeah here it is i've got it in my hand right now mabel yeah get june cameron's address and send max and a photographer over right away leaving a balance of um 60 cents would you like to take the rest out an aspirin don't interrupt marilyn never interrupts wonderful girl marilyn not like you at all i'm gonna marry marilyn as soon as i become a professor and what's more she's gonna marry me name's marilyn and i wouldn't trade her little finger for your well i just wouldn't it's all marion tomorrow this very day if i was a professor but i'm not i'm just a measly hundred dollar a month inspector and that's too much to ask anybody to marry one it's too much to ask no quite right hamlet this is too much to ask now that the bill is paid will you leave very well if that's the way you feel about it very well i have never overstayed or my company wasn't welcome now that's a very good boy good night good night [Music] good night hey wait a minute hey oh no you don't get off of that bed get up and get out of here or i've been thrown up this is the car md she married a doctor md1527 what a story well boys i'm glad i got here i miss cameron's publisher why the whole thing's laughable why don't you say that to the disappointed females but really listen the whole thing's silly well if john cameron's married then i'm the king of turkistan make way for his majesty congratulations where'd you meet him hold it please don't say a word just deny it deny what you now went on the couch now just a minute what's this all about what made you exchange the torch for the carpet sweeper cross your legs please uh yes again say wouldn't you rather i had on my bathing suit huh what made you desert the ship and jump into the sea of matrimony matrimony now wait a minute don't tell me what this is all about just let me guess i know a college initiation huh now look lady we're all losing a lot of sleep when where how why and who did you marry hey that's a very funny gig what is it you see how could she be married she doesn't know a thing about it stop that oh oh rice what's your husband's name i haven't any husband suppose that guy in there runs a chinese restaurant johnny throw these vultures out of here no it's no use june you might as well give them a statement i will give them exactly ten seconds to get out of here all right lady all right i'll just have to use my imagination oh wait wait that man in there really isn't my husband he's he's a a prowler lady i don't care what your husband does for a living well johnny do something they're gonna print on married you don't have to pretend with me why didn't you confide in me oh stop it will you there's nothing to confide so where did everybody get the idea that i was married what about the big surprise in the wire from greenwich oh oh that was about about my sequel and the surprise was that i had the first three chapters all finished and the just married sign and the partially dressed man in your bedroom dripping with rice giant but it's also simply explained yeah when you come to the man in the bedroom it better be good [Music] there i am [Music] [Applause] hello listen old man ms cameron's just explained everything to me of course i don't blame your reporters for jumping to conclusions on the surface it all spelt matrimony but um well take a colleague's word for it and forget the whole thing oh they're not married then we'll have to print that the gentleman in her bedroom was not her husband yeah they're married give me that phone but it was either that or else headlines screaming of strange men are running in and out of your bedroom it's all the fault of that migraine headache in there wake up wake up and get out of here oh you're responsible for all this you and your short thumbs and your 4.90 cents johnny maybe if he went down to the editor's office that's blocking the well-known barn the papers will be out in 15 minutes well we've got to do something this will ruin my career yeah and you can add my business to that spinsters on spinach is going to pay for my printing bill now all we can sell the copies for are door stops you don't seem to realize the enormity of the disaster oh johnny once my creditors get through i'll have to sublet my water cooler or will i hmm it might be filled with champagne what do you mean how many spinsters are there in america there are exactly eight million 423 000 who are not going to buy my book and how many married women are there exactly over 25 million you are going to write that second book a book about marriage we'll call it we'll call it um marriage ain't measles uh sorry are you sure you're feeling all right perfectly this is it this is our hall of plenty what you did for the spinster you can do for the housewife it's a bigger subject a bigger market do you get the angle you're converted america's number one bachelor girl tastes the fruits of marriage and loves it well even if i did want to write the book and i don't mind you oh johnny i don't know anything about marriage oh what's that got to do with it dante didn't have to go to hell to write his inferno wait a minute you mean you want me to stay married to this this thing only till you finish the book then reno and you can fake a divorce uh you must be pretty deeply attached to me to cook up such an idyllic arrangement with this medical pot roast here no thanks jeremy not for me oh listen june i didn't mean it that way oh my dear don't think for one fleeting second that my affections for you have altered because they haven't you know how i feel about you well you have a strange way of showing it throwing me into the clutches of dr jakel in there it'll only be a business arrangement when you come back from reno i should be waiting i know with an idea for a book called divorces of dynamite now no johnny i wouldn't spend one more minute with that man if the sequel went into more editions than the telephone book well it was fun while it lasted it's nobody's fault don't you worry about me i've been stuck with larger printing bills than seven thousand dollars oh you've worked so hard to get where you are i hate you no no no no none of that in this world you've got to think of number one yourself if you want to get anywhere you've got to be selfish i'm worried about you well i must be getting along knowing that printer i'll need a head start good night my dear good night johnny johnny do you actually think if i wrote a book about marriage it would sell i knew you'd come through of course it would sell women would love summer to tell them why they got married would they sure glorify the american home sing hosannas for the fireside and secure it yeah yeah that's it show them how to keep romance alive and uh and teach every wife how to be a sweetheart isn't it what about the other half of this deception junior will never go for it no i'll take care of him we'll uh we'll cut him in on the prophets you don't know junior he's got short thumbs ah well there's no use in talking to him now we'll let him sleep it off and i'll be back first thing in the morning good morning well we can't take him out now there might be quarters outside i think it was a gin marriage well everything's settled see you in the morning sweetheart wait a minute where am i supposed to sleep as if i didn't know [Music] um [Music] oh good morning johnny darling flowers oh that's very sweet thank you and how does america's favorite arthuris feel this morning i feel just like i slept in a cement mixer all night thank you well my plan looks even better in daylight it does harrison that's the printer is willing to play ball oh that's very good however i think you're gonna have a hard time getting junior in there to join the team and how does he feel this morning i wouldn't know come along and we'll wake up the sleeping beauty together well there is the human question mark and he's all yours wake up old man wake up bet you feel badly don't you awful terrible what are you doing in my room in your room that's right this isn't my room where am i you're a very lucky man you've made money while you've been asleep that's it break a turn gently hey this is me that's right but i couldn't be married to you for what madeline say this is a frame up where my pants don't look at me i'm not wearing him don't get out of here nah just a minute short thumbs if you don't mind i like to change my clothes at the beginning of each well i don't care what you do to the beginning of each day i want my pants listen do not explain the whole thing to him good luck thanks hey listen no man that's right you listen to me what am i doing i should be the only one the whole thing who are you now let me explain the whole thing's as plain as the nose on your face leave my face out of this where are my pants and then you see doctor they put two and two together and said you were mad and i'll make it worth your while to stay that way no wear my pants i you know he's stubborn that's an understatement where are my pants maybe i'd better give him ten percent of the gross while you're at it throw in his pants now listen doctor if you'll just do this tiny simple little thing for me i'll give you ten percent of the girl no it's all the cheap for business done for the trash that she writes i'm going straight down to the papers and deny the whole thing thanks yes dr and mrs sterling a wedding greeting from professor and mrs klaus hauser one two three here's success to the bride where are my parents [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] you'll [Music] congratulations dr stern oh youtube get out of my way you're off the family hearts when things they go wrong and here's to the pair with my head and there is cares of this world with my head far from your heart the troubles come you'll never be apart and here's to the groom so small wide and strong defender on the family [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] oh congratulations get the morning express in the herald get all the papers i want to talk to each one of them tim oh hello dad look i want to explain it what's going on you don't know how happy you've made me for a time you know i was afraid it was going to be mad on him you were look look at that your mother's chin all over again please listen to him fine well-shaped head the daddy gotta listen to him good scotch blood dad will you please listen to me and sit down i've got to explain something that it's going to be a shock i've got a little shock for you my body yes i know another person by now sit down tim sit down i just spoke to dean law congratulations professor sterling yes but that's beside the professor but but i thought hampshire was going to get the post well it was very close until this morning but you know how the dean feels about marriage and as you're a married man in hampshire isn't oh but it couldn't be just because i married all the deans always had a theory the chair of neurosecurity should be held by a married man man who lives a natural well-balanced life will have a much sounder approach to the study of the unbalanced professor sterling too bad what's the matter with you son don't you want the professorship oh yes dad more than anything else in the world but but father i've got to tell you the truth tim congratulations we are mighty happy for you tim yeah well look father something i've got to tell you dean lorton congratulations professor sterling thank you when can we see the bride oh anytime we'll all drop up tonight [Music] you know for a moment i thought junior was big well what do you want now you've ruined her career and you've ruined my business but i didn't tell the papers oh oh you're going on the radio no no i thought it over and i realized what it meant to you both i knew you'd come through why i was doing it just saying to ms cameron just now i know a gentleman when i see one oh that's very nice of you doctor and what suddenly made you change your mind now don't get the idea that i like this i'm merely doing it because i'm a gentleman and i hate to see you ruin your career i i hope you realize all the inconveniences you'll be letting yourself in for the doctor knows what he's doing everything's all right you've nothing to worry about why the book will be finished she'll be on her way to reno to fake a divorce even before you know it because oh that's one thing i want to get straight now when you go to reno you must take all the blame you must make the separation look as if it's entirely your fault why well my my position at the university oh of course of course it'll look like her fault why we're going to paint her so black that no self-respecting man will even look at her i can see chivalry is not dead of course he's not doing so well but it's not then oh and there's one thing more uh now that we are married i uh where are we what do we you know uh oh oh oh yes i i've taken a year's lease on this place you mean we'd live under the same roof your own brother would be safe with me but uh oh the boat maryland he's coming on the boat at noon how am i gonna explain this to her oh it's perfectly simple well then explain it to me but if i don't tell the truth i'll lose her forever oh but you can't do that the secret must be between us three you know what women are she might get plastered one night and go blabbit all over the town if it once leaks out that you two aren't married well then we can just kiss goodbye to her career but i've got to tell marilyn something well tell her for the next three months that she must trust you believe in you use blind faith supposing she's nearsighted and doctor if she won't see you through this well then she's not the woman you thought she was and we've saved you from making a terrific mistake yes but if she sees this before i can talk i won't even get the chance to explain that's right she shouldn't see this you know how to take care of women yes but why not how to take care of marilyn hey uh she likes flowers well maybe if i wrote fast enough we could get the books out to the dealer before the boat docks wait a minute perhaps i've lost touch with things but aren't you supposed to look like a man with a 7 000 printing bill i'm very unhappy i'm a very miserable man i don't get it [Music] i hope it does not come i hope he's taking out somebody's heart noise then i can take you home oh he'll be here i know tim you can always depend on tim thomas yes oh thank you merci and thank you so very much for making my trip so pleasant oh look flowers that's another reason i just love my team he's very studious looking he's brilliant what's more important he's reliable [Music] oh hello johnny hello darling any signs of our doctor friend nope and you know i have a sneaky hunch but our little headache is going to disappoint us oh i wouldn't worry about him thank you oh why next door neighbor dr sterling congratulations oh yeah you won't regret it i never did i'd be married 16 years next thursday uh friday that's it oh it's so nice to have married people next door my wife's away just now but when she gets back we'll arrange to set aside one night a week where we can all have dinner together and then play bridge all right we'll do that yeah oh and uh if any time you need a cup of sugar while you remember we're right here all right [Music] he's back wouldn't give me a chance to explain did you hear that she wouldn't give him a chance to explain well don't take it soda hard you'd make a lovely executioner now what's the matter well i opened my mouth to say something and i got the newspaper right in it oh i'm sorry doctor i'm sorry things didn't turn out all right well she'll get over it after a while sure give it about three months well nevertheless i think it's darn sweet in spite of all the trouble that that you're still gonna go through with this after all you're not getting anything out of it it doesn't seem quite fair well gentleman's word is a gentleman's word i if you just show me to my room i'll oh now don't you worry doctor we'll make you quite comfortable i'll take that we'll take your things and put them right in here uh johnny the doctor can have the two top drawers in the dresser we don't need three make it three oh well i'd better put all these things of yours in the bottom drawer yes and uh where will i put these oh i'll show you oh man come this way we'll put them in the closet over here how's this is it crowded uh we'll soon fix that june dear yes johnny oh you don't need all the space dear take these things out and put them somewhere else oh there's always the ice box besides it uh it'll be good for the furs oh do you think this is a good location for a branch library well if you have no objection i'd like to continue with my profession i'm preparing my fall course of study oh i see yes oh is this my bed well you should uh well no not exactly but we have something wonderful for you in the other room you'd really be surprised how comfortable these things are oh they certainly are see better than any bed they make why i slept there all last night and didn't even know i was sleeping that's fine then you sleep there i was wrong chivalry is dead yes can we get an apartment with two bedrooms yes yes certainly we could take the penthouse and have butlers and football and everything i think is very generous no no i didn't mean that you see with my salary i can't afford to there you are doctor it's all yours we've settled everything wait a minute where are you going with that well i thought you could work up on the balcony but i can't work up there johnny when i work i've got to pace and there's no room up there well you can pace like this give me that oh june don't take this attitude this is very trying for all it most certainly is you take my dresser my closet's my bed and i'll tell you why i forgot something give me your left hand why i'm pronouncing you man and wife i am going to write this book in one week [Music] the man you love [Music] uh relative hey pastor what is um is that thing your idea of decoration no it has to be there i keep referring to it [Music] oh look would you please take that thing down i can't look this is important work i'm doing you a favor for just being i know and i appreciate it very much i'm sorry i just got that kind of a stomach i can't take it all right you're an escapist that's your trouble yes my dear i'm so happy oh hello dad oh she's wonderful my boy i'm so glad we came early oh i forgot to tell you dear that some of the faculty wanted to drop in and meet you tonight oh that's charlie congratulations my dear i've known tim ever since he was a little boy well how sweet doctor and mrs nielsen how do you do it why don't you come in please thank you yeah it's so nice for you to drop in like this oh yes indeed it's certainly it's not much oh doctor you shouldn't have done it oh no you shouldn't have doctor i just love surprises why it's just what we needed i was telling tim only yeah don't you think you better pick some sandwiches before the others come others this isn't that wonderful with all she's had to do making fancy sandwiches tim will you take this for me please why no no certainly not it only takes one to call the delicious pimenton combined with epileptoid attacks and there we found a small fibro cartilaginous nodule half the size of a pea wonderful specimen in flame and sagnus sanus i mean sandwich thank you you've an adjustment initiated my dear that kind of talk used to bother my wife too doctor look do they always talk sharp like that oh i suppose they do take it pretty seriously but if they didn't there'd be a lot less people walking about enjoying this nice weather we're having yes i suppose hmm oh there's some cookies in there would he put two to each cup for me please i'll give three to the dean he has a coconut fixation seems to me that's playing politics a little isn't it well tim's professorship is worth an extra cookie i suppose oh you know it's pretty funny for years tim worked 14 hours a day for that professorship finally he gets it but not from his research oh dear me no no the thing that finally decides it is a little custom called marriage wait a minute you mean you mean that the dean gave tim the professorship because he was married to me i guess both kim in a chat called hampshire were up for the job tim was married hampshire wasn't another of the dean's fixation and i think he deserves next to a couple of cookies for that don't you by all means doctor yeah yes i could but where's the coffee everybody's having a wonderful time everyone but hampshire oh he's not here tonight no he's probably out committing suicide or uh getting married yeah a little late aysan uh-huh tim would you please give this to the dean look why so many cookies why you ungrateful thing that's a bonus for giving you the professorship doctor would you carry that tray for me yes my dad yeah you're not getting anything out of this you're only going through with it because you're a gentleman and you don't want to ruin my career gentleman's words gentleman's word dean thank you to timothy who yesterday was only an instructor and tomorrow who knows good night good night dean [Music] good night son but miss cameron i was going to tell you who you were were you if you don't so you were going to take my exam and three drawers in my dresser two weren't good enough for you oh no will you listen to me i don't care if you're nine foot six you're going to sleep on that couch if you have to do it in sections chocolate milk please chocolate malt with egg oh no egg just a plain chocolate malt yeah but there's no charge for the egg it's a special today no thanks just plain yeah but it won't cost you anything besides it's good for you no egg damn you get out of here please you've got to make up your mind to listen to me i'm not married i never have been married but the papers i can explain the whole thing this is the way it started skyler764823 seven six eight four three they made me a professor because i was a married man but now that you are a professor you can deny it oh but how can i explain to reporters the fact that i passed out on her bedroom i mean that sort of publicity and i'd be boasting the university but when she goes to reno you're going to get publicity oh but that isn't scandal anybody has a right to a nice quiet divorce why even the dean himself has had three wives let's get out of here we're getting a little conspicuous yeah uh let's have a drink maryland idea over there over there marilyn i promise you the minute she leaves for reno we'll sneak off and get married yes but cookie this cameron woman uh are you and she living in the same oh but it isn't the same dear i mean we we seldom see each other but you're not living with your father now uh have you an apartment of your own apartment uh yes yes at the uh standish arms uh you know on the gramercy place oh fine cookie i'll be over to dinner tonight hey you put an egg in this you will but but the kitchen is awfully small it's big enough for cocktails i'll be there at 6 30. you'll be there at 6 30. well think of something what i mean something special what do you mean well i i mean someone to go with cocktails you don't want to come up and find just martinis just martini there are exactly seven million bars in this town and she has to have her cocktails up here she's coming because she's suspicious and if you don't hurry and she finds you here it'll be all up just tell her i'm a woman with good taste and therefore i would have no designs on you she happens to be the girl i love you've told me that before there should be any signs of femininity around here perhaps you'd better take the flowers out of the curtains then huh what's that that's himmelweiss he's always in my bedroom instead of a mattress don't stand there she'll be here anymore don't you yell at me you microbe hunter it's bad enough being thrown out of my own apartment i'll never get that book finished it'll only be for a couple of hours i'm not too trying to put in the closet huh miss marilyn what are you gonna do well uh i'll get into bed and you can tell her that i'm a patient no no no oh that's your green girl she sounds more to me like the village blacksmith hey anybody home it's dead hello well it looks like a big night for professor sterling yeah oh they're not here yet but you see dad we were just going out and and who's not here yet burke hearts in town very enthusiastic over your migraine work berghardt stringer's bringing him out relax what did you see tonight yeah we're planning on going down to uh uh hello hello hello pop what's this have you two had a quarrel yes yes he hit me you didn't yes he did well i i only pushed her you only pushed her tim i shouldn't have to remind you that this is not the neolithic age well how would you like it if someone said that your father was a pompous opinionated old windbag i didn't say that i would be honest enough to admit that the person was absolutely right he's lying i never said i don't care who said it my dear it's true i talk too much your mother always said that yeah yeah come on come on come on we're gonna patch this up oh no no pop i'm sorry i'm going home to mother but you better hurry you're not you're gonna stay right here no i'm sorry i can't pop i've got to leave i won't have that i tell you it was downright childish breaking up a wonderful union quarreling over me i won't have it i tell you let me see your thumbs your thumbs pops i miss him i thought so no use an arguing with you tim i see a slight improvement she's your patient yeah go on my mind go on what you're waiting for riga mortis sitting kiss [Music] go ahead [Music] i'll go i'll go dad no don't you go oh no no no no don't be nervous son you know more about headaches than any of these fellas hello sweetheart johnny this is uh tim's father this is johnny how do you do a wedding anniversary married you know eight days today and we thought a little celebration oh oh dr burkhardt welcome to come in come in my daughter enormous sterling dr burkhart mr uh mr uh pierce michelle yes mr pierce you know dr streeter hello look i want to talk to mr johnson next door on 14a yeah right away what they're not in oh that's fine uh i mean uh thanks very much tim tim where's tim oh i'll get him will you excuse me please thank you thank you hey i don't want to seem like a nagging wife but that's not the way to the living room you know well i'm going to sneak through the apartment next door then out at home then i can head and balance off at the elevator it's him tim you better go in there and see that first come on all right here he is dr burkhart my son dr sterling oh how do you do doctor i've been looking forward very much to meeting you i've been looking forward to meeting you ever since twitter sent me your paper on migraines thank you very much now you two better sit down here i know you have a lot to talk about oh no no no not just yet please um let me fix your cocktail first and tim you go into the kitchen and fix some of those wonderful cheese things that you do so well oh yes those things yeah no don't bother oh man you have your talk i'll fix it i certainly will you see i'm sorry but this is one of those things tim has to do all by himself hurry darling [Music] marilyn you got the wrong apartment oh but you said 14b oh did i whatever made me say that lucky i caught you isn't it yes well how do you like it this isn't your apartment huh this is your mansion oh oh tim it's exquisite that's the time being i never thought you'd have a place like this i'd rather die i'm sorry if it seemed such a shock but after all in your last place you only had one chance yes i did didn't i how can you afford it well you see i'm a professor now and uh practically makes me a head of a department yes but even so and of course i've been doing quite a bit of consultation work too well i need a drink now oh yes the martinis i don't know it's time to make them yet but i'll soon fix that don't you worry [Music] don't you know where you keep your liquor well as a matter of fact i never know where that button is going to put a thing but yeah that wouldn't surprise me a bit if you had them out in the kitchen right now you just pick yourself at home and have a cigarette and i'll attend the drink situation huh [Music] so this is the nation's number one career woman it was oh thank you thank you uh perhaps but personally mr sterling you look to him well don't be long i'm a silly doctor with cuisine you're very quiet for an amateur chef we hardly heard you in the kitchen at all everything under control dear well so far all on the fire but it just needs watching yes sir tim come back here yes dad what's the reason for this sudden affinity for the stove you never knew your way around the kitchen before marriage marriage has changed all that hasn't it darling dr sterling is this the anatomical head your father was speaking about yes i understand it's a replica of a glandular case you had at the clinic yes we covered it from caliper measurements it's uh uh oh something's burning i oh johnny would you bring me a drink or better still bring the shaker right hey take it easy old man i've got marilyn next door well that's not melon but you can't bring her in here i'm not going to but you've got to get rid of her i'm trying to get rid of it now if they get suspicious knock on the wall we okay cookie yes dear well that's why there's an underserved time and will my cookie forgive me but what's that a forgive darling i never thought i'd be a suspicious woman but for a teeny moment i really was but you had every right to be darling every right in the world i see now you had to go through with the marriage well yes to get the professorship and in order to make enough money to take care of a professor's wife but the minute she goes to reno we go to greenwich torino uh what were his findings on high procedure of the scalp well i'm not quite sure he asked him to come here a moment will you please surely my hand it uh went to sleep what's that oh just myers where are you going cookie i i got a little surprise for you in the kitchen oh you're sweet oh and stay here for just one little minute and don't pee cause if you do never forgive you oh now professor you don't want to spoil everything do you that's a surprise recipe [Music] [Applause] take a good look these are your cheese surprises oh tim what were your findings on the oxygen treatment in regard to hyperesthesia of the scalp well i i can't say that i came to any definite conclusion but i'll say this that during july at the clinic out of 15 cases to which we administered oxygen we found that 13 of the patients had developed a yeah oh pardon me gentlemen it's a little woman here are your cheese surprises but don't offer me here hey wait a minute where are you going look call me on the telephone ten seconds but what about [Music] hello yes yes is dr sterling a what a seventh numeral gastric well i'll be right over oh cookie mustard yes dog or fate i must but i'll tell you what i'll do i'll put you in a cab and then i'll pick you up later huh hi put your hand head my what my head yes my hat hello doctor oh hello been keeping you busy we certainly have that's our new neighbor they want us to play bridge sometimes oh that's nice oh that train it's so good to be back again well it's good to have you back lydia i missed you something awful this time i didn't go anyplace i didn't do anything i just couldn't sleep like now with this thought in mind let us return to our microscopes and examine the specimen again the doc there's something on our minds you amaze me mr slapkovic what is it well the coach was just wondering if we're going to be eligible to play against fordham on saturday well gentlemen as you well know 75 is the passing grade and so far you can find all your passing to the football field well uh couldn't you give us some kind of an examination right now if we passed we'd be eligible to play on saturday all right here's your examination question number one how many bones are there in the human body mr o'brien uh uh well um couldn't we kind of uh think this thing over and uh phone yeah oh come come mr o'brien how many bones in the human body well uh well there must be dozens well i can't exactly call that wrong good luck on saturday oh gee doc you're regular we could offer ryder for you all right doc we'll murder him with that old xyz play yes sir sterling that's a miss thomas wants to see you in your office oh thank you very much june cameron's new recipe love hot milk and honey for hard-working hubby always look exciting girls says june hot milk and honey so it's only a business arrangement oh tim how can you do this to me but i didn't pose for this thing it's trick photography i'm the laughingstock of all my friends i can't put up with it any longer don't worry dog you won't have to this time you've gone too far oh johnny you promised don't blame me charlie must have done it i'll give you exactly three weeks to finish your little masterpiece and get torino oh she can finish the book in a few days but she can't go to reno for a month but immediate divorce would kill the sales i'd give her three weeks that's strange that sounded to me like an order not just the way i meant to the sound is that so yes well if that's the way you feel about it my pathological playmate we can put an end to this thing much sooner i think i can arrange to have you in maryland's arms by suppertime how perfectly simple i'll just call up the gentleman the press and tell them we were never married no no you came to that university a great hitter you don't think you should do a thing like that and ruin our own book do you i might if i got mad enough and i think i'm mad enough now you listen to me my microscopic friend you might be able to give orders to that barnacle you're engaged to but the last time a man tried it on me i was six and he was seven and for one solid hour i beat him over the head with my old a sucker now you're so brittle of one of these cold days you're going to break up into a million pieces and when that happens i want a seat right in the grandstand that's very funny you're like all the rest of these career women just an inferiority complex turned inside out don't bother i'll go oh pop what a pleasant surprise and dr street didn't come in thank you doctor would you mind well son you both look very happy the three of you oh uh may i have your hands no no we're adopting for a little just to give him a little advice oh tim streeter feels that when you talk to burkhart you ought to make it quite clear that you don't want him to use any of your research in his new book junior you'll be along see that he doesn't get too generous i will oh i don't think that i'm june dear i forgot to tell you but the burkhardt's invited us up for the weekend i think you'd better start packing because we'll be leaving in a few minutes oh will we well let me hold you up it's a good seven hour drive my best to burkhardt oh you're going to have a very interesting weekend they've got a 15 year old daughter she's just written a novel and she's dying to read it to you i'm dying too thank you now what is this all about well i'm sorry but i i forgot to mention it oh i see well it really doesn't make any difference because i'm not going anywhere but darling you must if you don't go then his father will think you're staying behind on my account johnny i'm going to finish the book over the weekend but you can work up there oh you can it might be yes but just to keep the record straight remember i'm doing this for him and not for you all right honey please hurry up i certainly will goodbye johnny and if the last chapter's as good as the other six then my wife will be as rich as she's lovely come on we'll never make it will you please relax my muddling medico this happens to be one of those tender moments that you wouldn't understand goodbye daddy obama sweden second cousins thank you oh i see chester's come between us again huh yes and don't call him chester oh there's maryland square right right there get get down will you please why hello marilyn how are you where are you going oh we're uh i i i am going up to burkhardt to do a little work uh burkhardt remember i told you all about berkeley did you tell her yet oh sure sure i told ann she's she's leaving for reno as soon as she possibly can oh she's better of all the disappointed old maids she takes the cake always look exciting [Laughter] you know what i saw in the paper it was the funniest thing it said she was 25 years old she's 40 if she's a day yeah i'm right while i'm talking i didn't mean it angel well all right cookie you know what i've been thinking about you know where we could go on our honeymoon tim that's very rude well what slipped there did well it's not at all nice i should think after knowing her you'd appreciate your baby a teeny bit more oh i do i do angel i oh i do angel honestly i do am i forgiven forgiven honest truly oh well i gotta be going well well i'm gonna be going goodbye cookie goodbye you call me the first teeny weeny moment to get back i will i'll miss you i miss you too oh cookie yes bye bye bye dr sterling i presume nearly ruined everything well in case you don't know at the bottom of your car is not the ideal place to spend a weekend well i'm sorry but i had to talk to her oh careful cookie why you just missed getting us killed by a teeny weeny little bit you are about the most obnoxious female i think i've ever met i'm sorry forgiving forgiveness honest and truly and adjust from one cookie to another you must admit that's pretty stale talk that cookie business you know it strikes me you're laboring under the impression that you're superior to maryland well maybe in sarcasm yes but when it comes to well you couldn't lure me out of a burning building you know johnny and i were discussing only yesterday how quietly repulsive you are johnny uh-huh no his devotion to you is really touchy yes i think so loves everything about you your books your profits your apartment your liquor your cigarettes you know you and that little bundle of boredom are gonna make a charming couple and when people don't ask you out don't blame it all on her [Music] [Applause] really officer just during a bed i spotted the md license on the car you a doctor yeah well come on there's an emergency case follow me [Music] well joe your luck's finally changed this is dr sterling you mapped him up on the pike minded kindly a doctor put yourself out she's upstairs she seems to be having a lot more trouble than usual well most of the time it just seems that way i got to get back on the beat joel hope it's a boy just so it ain't quitting tuplets next time some other time uh officer what's matter inside is anything serious well the baby seems like i just don't want to be born baby well isn't there a doctor in the community yes there is but i couldn't find him out on another case i guess uh well i got to get back on the beat a lot of speeders going up to the football game yeah we shot with one of them i'll bet how soon not for a little while yet get any hot water smell your foot sort of twisted it sit down let's take a look at it i think you're sort of broken then blame chuckles i stepped at one while i was plowing now you better keep off it [Music] where's your nearest neighbor mrs sawyer about a mile down the road on the next farm would you mind driving down to ghetto i need some help no no it's all all right honey hop off the car [Music] what's the matter with me [Music] how is she well nothing much i can do for a while where's mrs sawyer oh she couldn't come she um she scalded the ham with some boiling water [Music] the bed [Music] hey that's your new dress yes it is i was afraid it had too much lure for me all right [Music] well kids how is it it's okay coming from you that's pretty good hail gets cold billy hmm [Music] another president no i'm afraid there's another career woman never saw so much kicking and screaming in my life she'll get over it hey doc it's an indian it's all rain [Music] oh [Music] sorry where are we on the way home it's too late to go to burke hearts now oh that's too bad you're gonna miss your talk with him aren't you all is worth missing i mean after all an indian isn't born every minute besides there'll be other weekends aren't there you know a discussion on the myelin sheath of the cerebrospinal nerve fiber is good anytime where did you pick that up oh i've been looking through some of our wedding presents would you like me to drive for a while all that must have been pretty exhausting oh no no no it's all right i was a little scared it's the first baby i've delivered since i was an intern really he looked awfully good from where i sat never could have done it without the help of mrs sawyer [Music] come in oh sorry tim i uh just want to get a glass of milk that's perfectly all right june well here why didn't you ask me i'd have done that for you yeah thanks i forget your milk never mind i'll get it um would you like something well yes thanks i wonder who that can be don't bother i'll go well mr o'brien mr slatkovich how nice come in what happened oh oh nothing just a slight concussion hey doc we won the game yeah we scored all the points between us would you two like to celebrate with a glass of milk oh no thanks hey doc it wasn't for you we wouldn't have been able to play your victory makes me very happy you know how we piled up those points god no the old xyz play that's the one where i take out the two guards in the tackle pardon me doc then louie starts around there cuts right through center oh boy i wish he could have seen it worked like nobody's business i'm sure it did uh thanks for telling me about it tell you about it well doc weed get off our right arm for you when we slap oh yeah yeah yeah well some other time boys good night orphan nice to meet you to come in and tell me about your great victory and uh so long i'll bust in on you like this all right nice hey what's the matter something eating you did you see those flowers yeah pretty weren't they but you didn't see the note that came with it said something about love and was signed john what the doc's name ain't john you mean some guy's trying to get away with a doc's little woman and he's doing it too else why would the doc be sleeping on the couch oh no doc's such a swell guy and they were so happy together hey who is this skunk with a loving of flowers i don't know but the name on the card was john and if i ever catch him i'll turn him to small pieces you mean we'll tear them to small pieces you know i think those do have a schoolboy crush on you yes i'm afraid their devotion will end with the football season cookie what oh no no no i meant this kind i'm sorry it's all right [Music] yes i think you must be pretty tired hold on don't go to bed please i'm not a bit tired why i once sat up 72 hours in the straitjacket case yeah well i'm afraid i'd be pretty tame after that besides my schedule calls for work tonight oh but you can do it tomorrow no sorry i don't think i can you see i promised johnny i had the whole book for him in the morning oh are you finished all but four pages i uh i better run along and grind those out don't you oh but you shouldn't work tonight really you you must be tired yes i am pretty tired however the book's still got to be finished and i then i can go to reno tomorrow night well i don't want you to feel you have to rush your money no no i mean after all i can always no i know but i well i'd like to get this thing over with as quickly as possible but a couple of days one way or the other wouldn't make much difference no of course it wouldn't but we promised maryland you remember yes yes it seems we both made a lot of promises [Music] yes well uh good night good night good luck chester [Music] good night chester [Music] tim did your shirts come back to the laundry yes june [Music] well i guess that's everything oh wait a minute you're forgetting your friend oh yes he'll advise that i hate to see him go i'm gonna miss that radiant smile i'll send somebody around to pick these things up i take them myself and i'm driving up to maryland space in new london she's giving some sort of party tonight well that's all right you you can have them picked up anytime it doesn't matter i wish you didn't feel you had to rush off to reno like this well she wants it this way yeah i'm sorry sometimes marilyn's a little uh well i don't blame her i'd have done the same thing you know in spite of the camera and wisecracks i do think she's been pretty decent about this it goes for you too time [Music] you know without a husband this book never would have been written yes without a wife i never would have been a professor we made our little speeches haven't we bye tim take good care of chester launcher yep goodbye i hope you and john will be very happy thank you and i know you and marilyn will be oh uh i forgot you know when we first got married i asked you to take all the blame for the divorce yes well i'd rather you blame it on me oh tim i'm sorry bargain's a bargain but it wouldn't look good for you besides the other way is much simpler look i'm not going to do it because oh you are going to do it i'm not going to do it that's all there is to you win just tell him it was cruelly or something say i say i corrected papers in bed oh hello there old man microscopes all packed yes well our little marriage conspiracy worked out very well didn't it with nobody the wiser you know pierce you're a pretty lucky guy oh i know the book will be selling like the proverbial hot cake i wasn't talking about the book oh june oh sure she's a great girl and you've been pretty swell yourself through all this thanks a lot goodbye oh man goodbye oh and by the way you don't know what a comfort it was to know that she was perfectly safe with you well goodbye once again professor freda schultz live here oh johnny you and your gigs well we i thought we'd better use another name after all you've got to be in reno six weeks you know do i look like friday shows to you but darling if they discover the june cameron's in reno then it'll kill the book this way we can go on selling copies right after the very day you announced the divorce you know donnie i'm a pretty happy man charlie and i figured the whole thing out in six weeks we can sell 80 000 copies that's wonderful johnny what's the matter nothing oh there is something i said nothing's the matter i'm from the morning express i'd like to see miss cameron no no man no interviews today now if you're first i think should i see me yes oh miss cameron were you married at greenwich why uh yes yes i was strange i've just been talking to the licensed bureau up there and there's no record of it there isn't well uh as a matter of fact it uh wasn't actually in greenwich proper you see it was uh uh outside uh yes yeah it was at that little place uh by the fork in the road you know look let's stop kidding around i happen to know you were never married how dare you say such a thing if i'm wrong show me the certificate well you see i i left it in my safe deposit box oh so you did look i don't blame you for faking the marriage you needed that kind of publicity for your book and i hate to be the guy that kills a golden goose but my job is to get news this is a swell story wait a minute wait a minute you mustn't print that star you you really mustn't all right i'll give you a break we go to press at 12 midnight if you could show me before then that you're married i'll kill the story but he can't print that think of what it'll do to the book think what'll do to tim they'll throw him out well who cares i care why this thing came out he wouldn't be able to get a job as a horse doctor well i don't think that's important you don't think that's important after he's been so decent with us you all of all the selfish individuals i didn't mean it like just what did you mean then yes we was just wondering if we couldn't see the dock for about a minute not here now darling all i meant what a prize package you turned out to be did you hear that he called her darling and she called him john he must be the guy that sent the duck's wife them flowers let's give him the xyz certainly that's it profits are important not people why johnny you've got a cash register instead of a heart well here's the future of a really great man at stake and you're worrying about the carnations in your buttonhole oh you're in love with this bumpkin yes yes i am in love with him now what do you think of that well i might have known it living in the same apartment why are you [Applause] [Music] hello operator uh will you get a hold of miss marilyn thomas for me in um uh new london connecticut yeah that's right and and hurry it up will you please hello hello this is miss cameron speaking as soon as tim i mean uh dr sterling arrives will he haven't called me right away it's awfully important uh no no i i'd rather discuss it with a doctor if you don't mind and but it's very important to his career i am equally important to his career no i won't have him call you i'm announcing our engagement tonight engagement but you promised you'd wait why if you announce it now it'll spoil everything don't you i feel we've done more than enough for you engagement of all the double-crossing females i've ever heard of my how do you like that chester [Music] look you wouldn't want her for your mother would you no certainly not no one in his right mind would men certainly are blind is all i have to say about the whole chester if the telephone rings you answer aren't you and don't you worry we'll be right back [Laughter] my sweet you know forgive me for being so late i heard it just as quickly as i could and i'm not dressed but then you don't mind you're so understanding hello darling what you're up to but i'm going through this now it's going to be terribly embarrassing not look how sweet you look tonight oh goodness i hope i'm not interrupting anything actually i what i want you to meet some of the folks oh tim don't bother now i'll get to know them all later marilyn you know what i'm going to do i'm going to go and sit in that corner in that chair and i'm going to be just as quiet as a teeny weeny little mouse and you go right ahead with what you were doing won't you good evening good evening good evening quiet everybody quiet i have an announcement to make oh please marilyn not enough well all i want to say is oh mrs sterling is that for you oh isn't it lovely [Applause] tim and i are congratulations tim why did you keep it a secret you can't get away with this i know you're not married you mean that well you know one thing leads to another oh tim is this true oh there oh and then the reporter said that he was going to print the whole thing well can't you just see those headlines dr promises primary society girl desserts wife he was never even married to why it's awful yeah becomes father of a child you never even heard about kind of a mess isn't it putting it mildly well i give up only one thing left to do yes what is it well i've got to marry you you've got to marry me well sure then when you go to arena you can get a real divorce you you can drop me at the nearest hotel well what's the matter never mind never mind you just pull in right over there nice night pillar up regular anthony no nothing uh where's the nearest hotel well you're looking right at it nice clean bungalows soft beds dollar fifty up all right i'll take one [Music] no oh say would you like to play chinese checkers with me no no not right now please [Music] hello yeah yeah oh you haven't had a license yet yes yeah i can fix that too yeah yes i'll be right over [Music] henry has anything happened that's it [Music] who is it pastor open the door go away i don't want you june i want to talk to you no i don't want to see you [Music] june please will you open the door let me in [Music] june i promised we'd play bridge next thursday with with johnson and his wife do you think he could make it oh yes i think so you

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Published: Sun Jan 09 2022