THE BEST OF r/DANKMEMES

me trying to explain a meme to my grandparents my grandma why does the astronaut have a gun me a kid with two gay dads thinking i'm immune to yo mama jokes yo mama so ugly your dad had to get a husband oh man sodium an explosive metal chlorine a deadly gas table salt nine-year-old jimmy who skipped school yesterday teacher jimmy was sick yesterday so he could not come to school from jimmy's mom [Music] come on just believe him girls tend to stutter due to nervousness when speaking to someone attractive girls when they talk to me oh my god i've seen the clip of this guy saying that name and he gets it right me playgink easy mode is so unrealistic like who wouldn't wash hands and wear a mask during a pandemic also me after seeing america hmm me worthless piece of a new one my six-year-old pc that's given me literally thousands of hours of faithful service me the finger that isn't cracking the rest of my hand using wikipedia as a source schools using the same sources wikipedia used as a source schools pov you work in netflix damn got em sir isaac i do not understand how do the forces of nature work three days later when a girl tells you she lost her virginity so you offered to give her yours my mommy raised a gentleman no one babies once they enter the airplane screaming until i pass out challenge human comes home after disappearing for eight hours they smell like another dog are you enjoying reddit not really or i love it me about to press not really because i don't want to rate the app in the play store me slips out of fart the fart r slash i am a total peacemaker what are the mario brothers views on human trafficking mario says luigi says cha-ching your princess is in another castle sorry mario are you winning son yup having a great time thanks dad what was he doing playing an online game time for dinner son pause your game my mom and the mailman saying that they were only wrestling me who watches wwe daily but has never seen those moves sir our policy is every customer must wear a mask in our store but i have a medical condition that makes it hard to breathe and what condition is that sir coronavirus no one ambulances [Music] five-year-old me when my mom brings home a new guy but he gives me video games i'll allow it i'm tired me too losing streak enough already we stop here today one more game okay yeah yeah okay whatever yeah okay sure yeah invite me right way up nope upside down nope right way up sure yeah come on in me upset because we have the lowest score in the game my dad explaining how golf works we're last meeting we're first six-year-old me can i have some money to buy lego my mom say the magic word me the magic word me my mom my dad the lotion the napkins incognito mode the streaming button no u.s education system in the media 10 of all american adults who believe that chocolate milk comes from brown cows i really hope no one actually thinks that usa i'll end world war ii russia no i'll end world war ii hitler the first meme was created in 1921 and it looks like this how you think you look when a flashlight is taken how you really look it means that in one year it will be 100 years since the first meme was created then we must celebrate we will also have to pick the meme of the century yes officer i did have to run that child over it lined up perfectly with the beat drop all right fair enough you're good to go think 2020 has been hard for you look at what it's done to eminem poor eminem when you find a spider inside and you don't kill it because its web is full of mosquitoes we will watch your career with great interest bully calls me gay me and my boyfriend about to kick his ass germans have no sense of humor you guys can't have fun the last time we had fun the americans had to save you rtx off rtx on if you ever feel useless remember there are bus and taxi cars in the movie where everyone has a car damn that that that's deep ancient romans watch a guy getting mauled by a lion yeah that that's definitely what happened us which is about to ban tick tock india which has already banned tiktok north korea which banned tik tok from the first day my meme within seconds my meme for the rest of the day it feels bad man me puts tape on my laptop camera my fbi agent who was watching me from the laptop camera my chinese spy watching me from the toaster when a girl takes her top off in front of you but you're so into asses of pixar moms that nothing else arouses you anymore titties yes i remember when you buy a game for 30 and it becomes free the next day this hasn't happened to me yet but i know it will one day and i will be very upset reasons to have a kid lose virginity play with legos again my remote me about to spam the pause button so i can get this frame [Music] when the walmart guard takes my temperature with the wrong gun oh no reddit is the upvote button red or orange me an intellectual red orange whenever one after exam is disgusting if the answer was 2 times 10 to the 12th power or 2 times 10 to the 10th power but you know it was a syntax error that that frame is uh is very uh it's something anime characters when they're 17 me at 17. [Music] god boys with a time machine better change the past and create new timelines men with a time machine get your ass back in the water why two wild animals trying to date each other the nat geocamera cameraman who's waiting for them to have sex my foreskin when i hold it that's not this isn't this shouldn't be that funny please don't sort by new it's awful there someone has to girl touches my hand my dick erects me why though she only touched my hands my dick i am a bot and this action was performed automatically six-year-old me watching formula one when i grow up i want to become the greatest racist in the world mom the what dead america america america don't even get me started when they ask how did you become a coder i just kept googling stuff and it keeps working people on the equator be like reddit please confirm your email me confirms my email read it do it again girls boys don't know what true pain is like boys doc hudson does not appear in cars 2 as is voice actor paul newman died from lung cancer in september 2008 a conversation between mcqueen and mater indicates that doc died before the second film doc's memory lives on as the piston cup was renamed after him oh yeah i need a moment i just read the average age to lose your virginity is 17 years old i'm finally above average for something me googling the answer to a question finding the whole answer sheet oh yeah the class clown at school the class clown when he gets home the quiet kid at school a quiet kid when he gets home that this is true i was very quiet at school but very active at home when you secretly hope that the grim reaper is a woman so that it will never come for you me my gf naked with knee-high socks is sexier than being fully naked i mean flash games school computers unblocked flash games school computers i think we all know where this is going so let's just skip to the end rule 34. when you realize toy story 1 came out 25 years ago don't remind me redditors when they see men paying for only fans and defending thoughts look at that simp also redditers when they see a girl holding an artwork teacher why do we see lightning before we hear thunder the smart kid about to explain that light moves faster than sound me who knows that the real answer is lag china bans youtube facebook etc usa bands tick tock vpn companies money when rich redditors see something they like me i have nothing to offer you but my love oni japanese word for demon girl japanese word for devotion slash duty o'negri japanese word for rice ball netflix is sexualizing children me checking reddit for the fifth time today yeah i know india is always ahead of america no america is the best why was he crying bro i said india is ahead of america due to the time difference my dad a very rich billionaire my mom a famous hollywood actress me who can't stop lying about my parents dad do you mind if i give your lego sets to your cousin you are 36 now i have to go texting a friend having walkie-talkie sex i'm coming over that's stupid when you're having sex and she moans your real name instead of your gamer tag no banner only hulk my wife with a time machine don't marry him he's a psycho okay me with a time machine my dad at 17. i'm gonna feed my family by working hard day and night me at 17 i'm gonna draw a meme by hand so i can get fake internet points people who put their own photos as their wallpaper psychopaths it's azure no it's turquoise blue greetings what is your name fat blob me trying to be funny fat blob yes you look like one getting roasted by the ai joaquin phoenix not realizing you won best actor at the kane's film festival because it's all in french i didn't get it me i'm sure this girl is the one god has chosen for me god planning to use her to hurt me for character development girls are boring and lame guys are disgusting and awful neither of us are perfect yes no one the banana that's been sitting in my lunchbox for the whole summer okay look if your banana looks like that you might want to just you might want to torch it burn it some drunk teens having sex at a party me after nine months bonjour when you've been playing with a random stranger online for the last seven hours but now he says that it's time for him to leave me him oh when you finally catch that mfr who caused the tornado in your hometown what a butterfly shut the up drug cartels secretly making drugs the netflix documentary crew i've also thought about this my pregnant mom has sex with another pregnant lesbian me and the other kid in the womb bonjour guten tag 11 year old in real life 11 year old an anime 11 year old in netflix i don't like it art teacher draw a horse me hey look don't you call me out like that again me after downloading nordvpn on my tesla and setting it to germany so that i can drive at 424 miles per hour legally yeah this is big brain time celebrity is having an intense mental breakdown the paparazzi outside the house man i hate this image so much teacher there's no job where you can google all the stuff you need don't use google programmers karen uses essential oils cancer cell oh no anyways yeah get used to this meme format it's in here a lot person looking for an empty stall me taking a poop yeah look away please when you visit a british museum and you realize that you paid to see the monuments the british stole from you hey what's going on here i don't like this one bit when no one believes it's possible to get free coins but you got 40k free coins after entering your mom's credit card info haha everyone's stupid except me all these memes about gender reveal parties me a european who just woke up oh my god what's happening boys making a boys versus girl meme without ever having interacted with a single girl in their entire life ah yeah i know what's up except i absolutely don't when your grandma gives you ten dollars and says don't tell your parents i gave you this ah thanks grandma you're the best when me medic tells you to upgrade to pro to remove the watermark oh no anyways yeah sorry me matic just it's not gonna happen when the dentist starts poking at your gums and says two three one three two three four one one two one one these numbers mason what do they mean it's the dentist's secret code none of us know when your alt account gets a free reward so you give it to your meme to make it look more popular ah you see i pulled a sneaky on ya when you go to see infinity war but the movie doesn't last forever oh man this is a total rip-off when a group project is due in 20 minutes and you and the boys haven't even started uh guys emergency meeting when someone on the bus blasts their music on a speaker but it's good music angry dancing kid are you gay me no kid it means being happy me did i stutter that moment when you're neither gay nor happy feels bad man feels bad disney what made you sell mulan for 35 dollars for disney plus users on top of the 8.99 subscription disney money i mean to be fair disney is a lot like mr krabs the company's like i gotta get me money me boy that's that's probably not a suitable back pocket the thread oh it is holding on for dear life women's rights got invented in 1920 women in 1919 yep they had no rights it was all left girls are like oh no i have nothing to wear with all those clothes guys be like that still smells good i'll just wear this shirt again i mean it'd do me like that sometimes australia being the upside down place memes south america and africa and antarctica yep they're the ones who are actually upside down someone shouts emergency dude named incy konichiwa i have emerged when the teacher notices who has a crush on who and pairs them up i am a generous god yes you are teach yes you are girls in class oh my gosh i'm gonna use these to highlight everything these glitter pens are so cute boys in class hey do you have a pen i was gonna ask you bro hey when two kardashians tried into a narrow door the the other it's just like none of it's budging all right you can't you can't do it you're just gonna have to widen the wall it's just never gonna work adam and eve walking the earth for the first time queen elizabeth who was already there greetings don't mind me i've been here for a while me i'm ordering food you want anything girlfriend no her as soon as my food arrives hey so you're gonna share with me right your food you mean our food right babe me dad a boy in school keeps calling me gay dad then be a man and beat the crap out of him but dad he's so cute dad alright emergency meeting me poor snacks and a bowl cat doesn't want it me shakes the bowl a little cat is for me yes kitty it's for you boys in grade 12 physics i don't know what i'm doing boy's calculating optimal airflow for their rtx 3080. all right this has to be perfect my little brother i definitely know how to play chess i'm a pro at it also my little brother kasparov is conglomerating his pawns into a mega chesatron i mean clearly your brother knows what's up everything is eighty percent off on stream oh okay let me check this out oh it's the game everything huh okay well i'm packing it up king dies his eldest son oh no anyways i shall be your ruler maybe you should walk a mile in my shoes before you judge me or just walk a mile in general you fat whoa kyle's coming in strong teacher the test isn't hard the first question do i make it 4 20 or 69 oh god what do i do me being too lazy to stand up and get the remote my younger bro being nice to me for no reason here you go bro girlfriend why do you always say gg after every game me because that is the way old rich man dies his 40 years younger wife oh no anyways guess who's coming back from the bank sponsored youtubers explaining how vpn works uh you see the hackers get stopped by the vpn which protects your data right you guys see how it works now or did you just skip 20 seconds dang it they probably just skipped me gets bullied mom tell the teachers right away grandma how to commit war crimes and get away with it you see grandma's coming in with the real answers when your free award is about to expire nice meme random citizen hey i mean you gotta do what you gotta do and plus you're probably making that random redditor's day me with two gay dads thinking i'm immune to yo mama jokes you must realize you are doomed the bully oh i don't think so your mama's so ugly you think you have two dads freddie mercury mama anyone in a 10 mile radius ooh size large reddit user has an opinion the guy who disagrees and has 200 alt accounts do you want to keep the opinion or do you want to keep your karma uh no not the internet tough guys these guys are the worst me and my friend in an argument me okay let's check google to see who's right google search proves that i'm right my friend yeah well google isn't always correct me bro you think you're smarter than google out of my face youtuber i just put a few ads into my video what's so bad about it the video timeline you see all that yellow yeah that's all ads that's more than just a little ads if you ask me when the quiet kid changes his profile picture to the joker um emergency meeting everyone privacy that's iphone my mom who tracks my location debit card balance and search history literally all the time oh i don't think so jeez your parents really do that gosh that is that's that's a little too much for me youtube puts two unskippable ads before a video satan even i'm not into that and you shouldn't honestly it's annoying xbox has better hardware yeah but ps5 has better exclusives i will sell my kidney for an rtx 3090 yes i mean if we're being honest pc is the best i mean come on scarlet witch destroys the mind stone thanos oh no anyways wow they really brought back infinity war just to make this meme template you know what respect food company we can't reveal our secret ingredient customer what if i'm allergic to it food company some of you may die but that's a sacrifice i am willing to make when you are swimming and seaweed touches your leg level of stress 99 super critical video calls and movies oh that's some 4k stuff right there video calls in real life i think it's glitching communist russia and memes see it's so funny and beautiful communist china and memes everything is dark and nothing matters me i'll put my drink in the freezer so it cools faster me opening the freezer two days later oh no you see we all have to make this mistake at least once in our lifetime since the man under me doesn't need any light i'll shine it on the man with the book well technology has come so far i know right well that is a brand new sentence satan the guy who introduced letters and maths yeah so i invented this thing called algebra with variables and oh god please stop my friends no you can't remove the text from the meme people won't understand it me what i don't know what it's trying to say i i don't get it nah i'm just kidding we've seen this meme way too much to not know what it is when spotify plays a suggested song that you know and like i'll allow it when you add a rick roll to your presentation and the girls who do tick tock dances start saying cringe your boobs mean nothing i've seen what makes you cheer the perfect yearbook doesn't exist so i heard the ladies like bad boys lucky for them i'm bad at everything mwah brilliant school quote mom don't waste your time drawing silly memes me but i mom bunk hey come on mom let the kid make some memes clearly he's doing a good job at it i'll do the homework tonight i'll do it before school i'll do it while the teacher is checking it i'm not doing it ladies and gentlemen welcome to the circus when i'm trying to groove to some music but my mom says i shouldn't be dancing at dad's funeral man you just killed my vibe that's wiggity whack yo someone out there has the unknown world record of the most ding dong sucked now this is true and all in theory but i feel like the person who owns this record would definitely know that they've earned it even if it's unofficial one does not simply go about their life sucking the most and being completely oblivious about sucking the most it just doesn't happen me my dumb ass cow that just ate a flat screen hey you're not mad at me are you that was my tv man gunshots jet engines my dad sneezing seriously why is he so loud greek lo-fi girl exists and then along came zeus yeah zeus was the xxx tentacion of his time he just couldn't keep his dick in his pants american college students i can't wait to turn 21 to buy alcohol europeans barely out of kindergarten haha stupid americans look googling gary oldman the r and straight men yeah because without the r it spells oh oh yeah yeah no the r is doing a lot of heavy lifting the wwe says please do not try this at home mom and the mailman i'll ignore that uh buddy yeah i don't think they're wrestling boys when they see big tits oh boys when they see small tits oh yeah it's literally the same thing we have simple minds okay some say heath ledger was the best joker of all time some say joaquin phoenix was the best joker of all time but deep down we all know that she ignored all your messages and you are a better clown than both damn what the microwave sees you know i've thought about that what does the microwave see and uh i think this might be accurate welcome to the gang kid we've got steel and steve murder and mike and red what did red do i don't know but he looks suspicious my favorite thing about the spanish harry potter translation is that instead of calling voldemort the dark lord they call him senor tenebroso which basically means mr spooky you were the chosen one i hate you anakin was the imposter yeah yay i graduated college what do i win a sad feeling no did you buy the new nvidia rtx 3080 yes what did it cost oh no what if you wanted to go to heaven but god said you are dead finish your tasks to win oh watch this paper here let me take a look gangnam style came out eight years ago oh god no when did words get genders am i a joke to you the smart kid arguing that the answer was 17 the asian kid arguing the answer is 22 me who got the gulf of mexico boomers this generation is the weakest they will never survive the real world four-year-old me who can lift two chairs at once are you sure about that my boyfriend is always there to back me up me who was called gay by the bully screw bullies the stare demon me the light switch ghosts following the imposter that killed them be like wait it was always a real image always has been boomer humor i hate my wife millennial humor i hate my life gen z humor me acting like i haven't stolen anything even though i haven't stolen anything [Music] exactly me asking for the name of the artist read it getting 100 upvotes no one schrodinger's cat god what is my head hurts looking at this dead body reported i'm sussing white no it's not me because i was with green yeah but red was near events so it's near him is red was not an imposter i tried my best i probably messed something up in that sentence hydrogen hydrogen oxygen memes then and then i says to her i says no i got your nose memes now uncle everyone mods bad mods gay the mod who let me post here even though i don't meet the karma requirement my ex texts me a 100 word text message about how she messed up and wants me back after she cheated on me with my best friend me cracks fingers cracks neck stretches okay when someone calls an emergency beating 10 seconds into the game and gets voted off i love democracy the whole lobby me who found the body the imposter dad he will be a football player mom no he will be a doctor me who already decided on becoming a ninja space cowboy the roman empire italy when you know who is coming down the stairs by the sound of their footsteps this is accurate teacher what comes after 360. me 361. teacher then why did you write noscope um coffee plants producing caffeine as a defense mechanism humans getting addicted to coffee and the caffeine when the teacher logs out of zoom because of bad connection and the host gets transferred to you revolution time with idiots 10 year old me after eating vanilla ice cream and realizing that it contains 0.00001 alcohol criminal when a zebra is getting attacked in a zebra documentary when a zebra is getting attacked in a lion documentary me and the boys reviving a meme in med bay nice i'm will you will what is this new meme i'm just now discovering when you email your professor at 2am and they respond within a minute united states hey russia lowell you should sell us alaska for two pennies an acre russia da okay united states you will all of you get out except you you stay welcome to the gang kid we got steel and steve murder and mike and deleted deleted but what did deleted do nobody knows my mom you don't want to end up like him the math teacher you don't want to end up like him the construction worker who makes double their salary my mom saying i should be a doctor my dad saying i should be a lawyer six-year-old me who wanted to be a dinosaur parents we're going to send you to an all-girls school their daughter who's actually gay you will so i saw this guy yup he came out of the vent yup i exposed the first imposter so you can trust me make sense to me then let's vote them out that's what an imposter would say orange was not an imposter teacher if you don't want to pay attention i'll honestly end this class right now the students you will cats i see on the internet cats i have at my home but still oh teacher what comes after five rockstar six teacher then why did you write five again um my parents takes my phone and laptop away to make me focus on my studies me a software engineering student me waiting for my teacher to stop yelling at my classmates so i can continue my presentation yeah when you spend half an hour searching for the perfect png and it ends up being a jpeg how dare you me in racing games only 350 kilometers per hour pathetic me irl 120 kilometers per hour is scary you're finally awake you hit your head pretty hard 2020 coronavirus wildfires you're talking crazy dude come on there's a blastoise down the stream we're going to bend stranger things later i'm gonna cry health experts please wear oxygen supply masks underwater americans oh imposter of the event what is your wisdom online schooling is just homework on steroids the letter k and knight the letter k and ok me introduces my friend to reddit two days later my friend man all i did was express my opinion in the comments and i got down voted by 1 376 people me when a kid catches you sneaking in but there can't be any witnesses crewmate there is one imposter among us oh no judge you'll be executed blue why the judge i don't know you seem kind of suss me and the boys on our way to find the imposter teacher if you disrupt the class one more time i'll talk to your parents the kid whose parents died in a car crash you will me explaining to my parents why my sister spends so much time in her room she's on facebook twitter myspace and when me tries to download an app from the play store play store you don't have enough space me but the app size is 2 megabytes and i have more than 500 megabytes free storage play store did i stutter me and my siblings who can't get past the level our older brother my god markiplier when he sees another stupid meme with his face on it yeah i can imagine third world country look we found a large deposit of oil america oil if you are depressed you are living in the past if you are anxious you are living in the future me the lady with a full cart of groceries in front of me me with only two items you can cut in front of me fall guys after dominating reddit but then being replaced by among us in less than a week you know i was god once mom go play all day i will do all your homework nine-year-old me who doesn't understand sarcasm you will how people who shouldn't have bred celebrate pregnancy how the greatest intellectuals celebrate pregnancy it is a baby rare look at among us servers oof my economics professor me explaining in the class how reddit giving free coins has caused an award inflation my teacher watching all the students clap for me because i got a 69 in finals which is more of a flex crayola 64-pack or airpods amateurs crayola uh 120 crayons yeah that's that is a big flex reddit when someone uses a template source the person who wrote ten paragraphs proving i'm wrong mew spotted that he used your instead of you are got em read man read foxes are just cat software running on dog hardware with a dolphin soundboard screaming no me making multiple accounts on reddit so that i can defend my when someone insults me the archaeologist trying to figure out what do the symbols on the cave mean the caveman who tried to draw him on the walls when the meme you created is so garbage that you downloaded yourself oh no buddy this is why i hate video games it appeals to the male fantasy i'm stuck in then step bro do you have to make rule 34 of every single female character rule 34 artists it's the law girlfriend's dad whatever you do to my daughter i'll do to you the bisexual boyfriend you will facebook and instagram absolutely no nudity whatsoever youtube you can have some nudity but it can't be straight up read it bro you can post every single video that has ever existed in the universe as long as you just mark it not safe for work when the two smartest kids get put in a group with the popular girl when you accidentally type jehovah's fitness instead of jehovah's witness cleaning my room by myself this is pretty nice cleaning my room after someone tells me to well i'm still gonna do it but i'm not gonna be happy about it me tells a joke no one acknowledges it me says it again as they probably didn't hear it uh didn't you say that before already yep just lemon juice on the wound that's pain the four horsemen of british spices no i'm just kidding there's only one bland and boring salt dad classic memes are back are you enjoying them i think they're kinda lame get out you're not my son her i think the earth is flat me how do i impress her how do i impress her oh i know me huh yeah i'm a freaking idiot too nailed it hero however will we know where the villain's lair is the villain's lair ah come on that is just screaming super villain trade offer i receive absolutely freaking nothing you receive a lifetime access seriously though has anybody ever paid for winrar i wouldn't be surprised if their programmers were homeless trade offer i received nothing you received 30 points 12 points for gryffindor if you're waiting for the waiter doesn't that make you the waiter it all makes sense now he not be jewish but his drip is real don't tell me jesus is wearing yeezys five no 14 no 22 no 40 year old me looking at lego sets i mean what can i say they just don't get old behold the discord mod throne i mean at this point it's basically a couch the dialogue option i choose what the character actually says oh no it's basically like you choose to say i disagree and the character just blurts out suck a lemon you chump and you're just holding the controller like yo what i did not tell him to say this beer companies after inventing my father oh dude they're rich rtx 3090 what is my purpose you're mining bitcoin oh my god when you're a cat and your human says it makes no nonsense compels me though how different countries award you for excellent journalism the usa gives you plaques germany gives you trophies and russia well maybe you shouldn't be a journalist in russia this show when i'm watching it alone well you know just a normal spongebob episode happiness all around the show when my parents walk in what the which episode did this happen in you'd be looking at your parents like guys it's not like this i swear trade offer i receive two pairs of socks you receive only one sock and no you can't have the other sock back google humans started using boats about eight thousand years ago people eight thousand and one years ago dudes just straight up running on water trade offer i receive your personal data you receive nothing so do we have a deal seriously i don't understand how we're all still being duped by a guy who looks like this he's an absolute mad lad a pokeman or something i don't know i'm not a simp a literal pokemane uh english kids in history class are we the baddies german kids in history class are we the baddies swedish kids in history class are denmark norway russia and poland the baddies chinese kids in history class we are the goodies and always have and always will be the goodies and nothing happened at that place at that time ah yes the best version of history is pretty much just shut up and don't talk about it lovely trade offer i received perfectly fine earbuds and you received a tangled up mess my pocket so do we have a deal youtube youtube isn't isn't for kids for kids youtube isn't for kids to monetize everyone who swears seriously youtube what the heck is this elon musk after making 721 million from tesla sales in 2020 nikola tesla after making zero dollars from musk sales in 1920. oh but this is an absolute rip-off the idea for light bulbs was such a good idea that it became the symbol for good ideas the ultimate shower thought i'll only ask this once who is sex and how did my dad offend them oh buddy you're not gonna like the answer i promise you that much hey so i think i like you wow i certainly don't recommend that dudes and they're like have you seen me i'm a mess spotify stealing my data hmm yes it's all here spotify trying to figure out my music taste no this is patrick me opening clash of clans after three years that one building upgrade still not done yep definitely sensing some unfinished business here me defending my virginity from the horny milfs in my area stay back i mean good luck but to be fair there are way too many of them in your area to defend yourself with just that knife you know what they say if you can't beat em join em the ugly girl in a teen movie lets her hair down and takes off her glasses the guy that's always ignored her she really is beautiful and then she becomes prom queen and then happily ever after trade offer i receive fiona and you receive your swamp so do we have a deal i mean how could you say no to lord farquaad come on take the deal dad doesn't want a dog family gets a dog anyway dad and the dog people let me tell you about my best friend ah come on those shirts are adorable trade offer i receive lizard food and you receive happy chemicals oh you know what lizard you got yourself a deal porn site when i say i'm 199 years old porn site when i say i'm 17 years 364 days 24 hours and 59 minutes old wait a minute no literally wait a minute when you give 5 of the 50 dollars you just found on the ground to the kid who said he lost his money you see i'm a generous god when you and your friend try out a new game for the first time level 12 level 9 level 8 000 try hard oh no run for your life national tragedy happens reddit hold on i've got a meme for that benson open the window i want to inform the dog outside that i too am a dog trade offer i receive your personal data and you'll receive cookies websites do we have a deal me 2012 memes no no you can't die stay with me those efforts are stealing juan man you can't have crap in detroit oh poor juan calling a female teacher mommy professional idiot calling a male teacher daddy now that's a good way to get an a plus mum turning off the internet me playing an offline game your powers are useless here you know if you think about it god has the most toxic fan base well he's out of line but he's right you have 100 trillion dollars but there's zimbabwe dollars which equates to about 70 usd oh man dark germanic tales a few moments later yep and this is how they look in the disney films they just take away all the cursed all the bad natured stuff and it's like a magical fairy tale meanwhile in reality cinderella's just a straight-up serial killer like stuff gets crazy average image fan oh gosh average zero frames per second enjoyer uh-huh oh yeah wait wait zero frames per second that's that's the same thing i don't need a job to live i don't live with my parents i have sex three to four times a day i have lots of free time i read a lot of books and i go to the gym a lot can't wait to get out of jail when a girl probably gives you a hint but you're not sure it's a hint it's a sign it's oh it's my overthinking mind why are you like this trade offer i receive oil and you receive democracy wink wink america why is democracy in quotes why is democracy in quotes god okay your species is going to power cars in the future dinosaur oh cool we get to drive god oh no no no you're going to be the fuel what oh this poor dinosaur is just sitting there like what yeah the truth hurts superman has super strength the flash has super speed and batman well i'm gonna pay you 100 to screw off ah yes the power of money objectively the best power me switching between different weapons the boss watching my character pull 14 different weapons out of my ass and then back in oh gosh this guy means business adding by zero subtracting by zero multiplying by zero and dividing by zero oh gosh something's wrong here apple when a new product comes out oh yeah we're rich just rolling in the dough apple when they have to pay the kids who work in the cobalt mines yes sorry we only got a couple of pities for you sucks to suck when you're sitting on the toilet and the motion sensor light turns off i am a master of stealth imagine sitting in a pool of your own filth uh you mean taking a bath this post was made by shower gang okay what what is this mess of a thing let me try reading it tonight on bottom gear i will break the guinness world record for most children in a basement james used a sawed-off shotgun to test if queen elizabeth ii is actually immortal as said and hammond helps donald j trump get rid of mexican immigrants using techniques learnt from an australian art school dropout oh come on this sounds like the most interesting show out there the pilot episode has got to be something wild me mom i want pokemons mom your uncle larry has some pokemons you take his uncle larry's pokemon okay before we get too quick to judge uncle larry look at how cool his pokemon are these are the most dangerous animals and rodents to roam the street alright let's just let's be honest uncle larry was onto something f the fbi my browser history the fbi tastes like a secret me oh gosh this planet humanity people who hold their trash until they find a trash can they're our last tool to protect this earth hats off to these heroes quick animal facts the silverback gorilla is actually covered in hair rather than silver oh you see now this is true i once saw a guy trying to mine silver off a gorilla's back and uh it did not go well for him staying up until 5 a.m oh yeah waking up at 5 a.m oh no what happened to my life why am i awake this early it really does switch up on us naming your child after a fictional character hey there callisie how was school i hate you with every ounce of my being naming your child after the greatest meal on earth i'm so proud of you mcchicken i love you dad all great stories start with a morning arm stretch and a butt itch yep what can i say i mean this rings true me waiting for the shower water to get hot oh way to flex on us bro me shortly after joining reddit i don't know why fortnite is bad i don't know why john cena is invisible all i know is i must agree glow-in-the-dark condom meat saber oh now that's a superior name how sophisticated ai is going to take over the world meanwhile the ai hmm this is a snail ah no we're gonna be fine i am a grown man i'm a big adult i can do this dodo birds weren't actually stupid they just didn't have any natural predators due to where they lived in their size so when humans came to the dodo birds they tried to play with them and become their friend which is how they were so easy to catch and got hunted to extinction it's just so sad youtube is going to remove the dislike button clickbait youtubers you will okay to be fair i mean after a video that youtube put out themselves became the most disliked on youtube i can see why they'd want to get rid of it just a clean slate the boss when you fight them the boss when you unlock them as a playable character oh hey how's it going you want to play with me yeah now this is just worse tell me science in two words nano and quantum you're hired hollywood ah yes hollywood with the most descriptive scientific language vegans when they go into a vegetative state at bliss teenagers in america i can't wait to be 21 so i can drink students in germany barely done with seventh grade oh yeah boys it's drinking time oh yeah seriously though can you imagine drunk seventh graders in america that's a whole new level of chaos me i screwed your mom friend what she's dead did i stutter yo pause pause all the way pearl harbor 2 403 casualties hiroshima and nagasaki approximately 150 000 casualties the united states were even now bitten yeah that was definitely an overkill my fat ass gains a bunch of weight during quarantine my wife calls me sexy what she really means he is 3.5 metric tons of raw sexual aggression hey well at least your wife is into it i guess water or toilet paper i will judge you i will judge you most of the world stores milk and cartons and bottles americans store milk and a large carton and jugs canadians bag it's a bag there using in drake format using walther instead because it's his birthday today americans after making a salad more unhealthy than most burgers around the world this is health my friend explaining how he robbed a bank me watching why he has so much milk and no money oh he robbed a milk bank ryan reynolds straight man being confident that they're straight no mr reynolds you're too sexy people who delete their comments when it's at negative one down votes people let 50 down votes and still keep their comment up billionaires be like ending the world hunger that's tempting but going to space for five minutes and barely making it there we go they hate being able to kill you every species on land being able to kill you spiders that eat birds vegemite considered a food source every species in the water being able to kill you australia please forgive my laughter he turned himself into a pickle a pickle all of our prophets will to go to benefiting the poo food for the poo president ceo robin mafude beautiful her i'm into nerds the nerd she likes yeah that's uh that means not a nerd that means oh that means an angel when you get multiple red shells in mario kart and now you're out for blood no ho suckers you're going down girls pretend that i don't exist i can attract girls by my intellect and humor girls don't exist anyway so yeah yeah me and my wife coming back from the market the house our pets uh where's thori average spotify fan average youtube to mp3 enjoyer oh it's like you read me like a book meme can't you do something about your superiority complex but i am superior i charge faster and i don't break off inside hey reddit i was feeling depressed a few weeks ago and met a girl in comment she reported me for stalking today anyway here's a pic of a cute couple i found on the internet i'm still lonely and sad trade offer i receive belly rubs you receive claw marks because that's all you deserve the chocolate bar when i buy it from the store beautiful the chocolate bar when i hold it in my hands for three minutes yeah it's dead it's it's dead overweight women oh hold them up super tall women let them drown short men you're sure didn't deserve to die i'm a grown man i am a big adult i can do this world's loneliest bird dies surrounded by concrete replicas he thought were his family oh god bill never gets sick but he takes proper care of his health also bill as a kid okay no offense hose water in the summer out of a rubber green hose oh it's so good it's so good man it's delicious duct tape sticky nanny surface duct tape sticking to itself hahahaha i am indestructible now anyone who liked or react to a post will be visible anyone who liked or disliked will be anonymous there we go with the real chance time to wake up awesome powers it's so evil with my penis rocket yeah baby straight up though i i'd beat the crap out of jeff bezos by the chance i might kill him he's that bad he's he's a terrible person just a terrible terrible person nah i'm kidding but i would beat him up joe joe who joe cool good ending good ending you don't see a lot of those religion in a nutshell do not question the elevated one [Music] wi-fi stops working meaning my photo gallery how you doing old memes i've missed your buddy babe can i come over i can i have a space trip with jeff bezos but i'm home alone person who paid 20 million to join jeff brazil's flight to space unable to go as they're busy well when you make 28 million dollars you can just blow it on a flight like that i guess yeah man sometimes you will be busy nicola tesla according to history channel evil nikola tesla according to you know facts he was a good man and he died poor which is sad god watching the indian guys video on how to make a universe in five simple steps oh so that's how i do it maybe that's why the world's so messed up he didn't watch the five simple steps only the four serial killers people who sleep in jeans well i guess i'm a person in the back because i do sleep in jeans sometimes and cargo pants when you see the skinny friend literally inhale six burgers and not gain a single gram how how joey my best friend joey same way but i don't know man humongous big chungus among us friday night funkin us i i don't know man that's the new among us i guess when you click on youtube video and it starts playing without any ads my god it's beautiful sucks for the creator who made it but beautiful ice cream truck six-year-old me my dad's saying it only plays music when it's out of ice cream oh man wait a second it doesn't do that taste of the food normally taste of the food after brushing your teeth it's bad going to work on a cold day woman men going to work on a hot day yeah i wear a hoodie around and like sweat and freeze to death all the same time mum lol can't believe they painted their face black with markers friends mom lol me my friend yeah how we get there these yoga poses are getting out of hand hmm volita flex blood more like violent flexibility because that lady got her neck snapped how germany pays for vulcans debt how japan pays for war crimes senpai how usa pays for war crimes it's not a war crime if you win how ussr pays for war crimes it's not a war crime if you win my friends 2003 i bet the rich illuminati have spaceships ready to leave earth during the apocalypse 2021 see your suckers later are sagada but you can't come with us ha nobody is born cool erwin except of course hey man you don't have to react every time i send a meme if you want to sleep on red i won't mind oh my god thanks bro he's he's a true hero when you check your friends list and the memories hit you online last online two years ago last online three years ago i'll miss you guys it was fun playing minecraft with you oh you're a virgin name every person you haven't had sex with easy everyone philosopher after all why not listen all i'm saying is if reddit didn't force live broadcasts maybe their servers would be more stable i'm just saying no one even watches those things the soundtrack the rest of the game the soundtrack when you enter the beach french fries when they're fresh french fries when they're reheated in microwave horrible terrible horrific terrific [Music] type c cables which can be inserted both sides type a cables which can only be inserted from one side nokia pin shape cables and laptop charging cables which are round in shape yes yes we do good no sun today boys got absolutely baked yesterday legs look like the baguette freak your zodiac signs what earth shape do you support i like the sea turtle personally that'd be fun just riding riding on the back of a giant sea turtle ah good times you got my order yes sir no problem red greeks out requests can you guys peel the cucumbers please if not no big deal but my girlfriend acts like a freaking snitch about unpeeled cucumbers like it's my fault i don't know man like please just peel them for me or at least like say you can't jeff bezos after taking off when he realized he was no longer the richest man on earth huh but i am the richest man in space my wife when she sleeps with her girlfriends my wife when i sleep with her girlfriends honey no but but you did it frex zodiac signs tall glass or short glass i drink out of a beer mug because i got big boy base when you're doing the dishes and feel soggy food touch your hand remove arm yeah yeah that's what i'm doing instagram models random girl working in coffee day yeah yeah yeah average farmer average karma farmer man that is one hot farmer though look at those abs and those arms how i imagine atms as a child here you are little one i legit did imagine this thanks to family guy lying president our president just lied the only time a politician tells the truth is when he says that another politician is lying calm down my underwear watching me spend 500 on meme coins cougar come on i'm pete your balls are peeking through the rips and your buddies nah nah they're good they're good no one sees me in them anyways this is a worldwide issue worldwide oh yeah it is yeah it is earth participating in the miss universe like whoa we're the only one with people that we know of heck yeah thick goth girls gothics edgar allan hoes [Music] yes lgbtq homophobes hating whatever the freak this is q force official trailer in all fairness i know some friends that worked on this as animators they use the worst scenes possible in the trailer just let the show come out i i hope it's not bad but just give it a shot frick zodiac signs how do you place your torches i don't even play minecraft so option four please korean music oh goody in movies dancing in the dark all alone i miss joji so much we need him to save the world my whole family watching me read my birthday card me trying to ignore the 20 that just fell out yup yup great thanks grandma you know anyone called junior means chances are your mother has moaned your name during sex sir this is a wendy's please go away the janitor the pe teacher the perfect ad doesn't exist viagra get it up with a muffler anyone with a brain you stay the flick back or i'll laser you god dammit people who think the age of consent should be lowered i'll laser every one of you i wish all who slept obviously in front of their own opinion a very pleasant frick you and jump off a cliff frick zodiac signs what's your favorite type of ice cream cone oh that's a toughy i i like waffle cones man but they leak the middle one's kind of a good mix of both worlds so i gotta go with that with with that scared people in earthquakes people who agree to have sex with me closing their eyes for 30 seconds yeah looks like i'm losing my virginity in an earthquake in good there's evil and evil there's good and then there's trevor trevor's amazing that's all i gotta say another icon ruined by drugs and alcohol the doge cloud turned into the low-key doge cloud pool buddy girls trying to steal my virginity me wearing my car sketchers haha i might be my team but you'll never take it from me i just ran into my wall trying to run away in a joke and i realize this is an audio medium not a video one oh well next meme here's a question for all you mind readers out there why yes yes indeed i would like to sleep with you i can read minds that's how i know writers when a female character needs to find out she's pregnant it's not just like uh oh i might be preggers from having unprotected sex my heel watching me use lotion to to whack off come on man i'm so crusty and dry i'm like an alligator elbow my immune system after making me feel miserable because i touched some plant yep sucks to be you me lonely butt virgin living in an oppressive community and haven't ever seen a woman naked random woman putting their nudes in not safe for work subreddits here you go have a taco many don't wipe their booty after crapping because it's gay rest of civilized society what is wrong with you why when you're having a shower and someone knocks on the door yes one second i was scrubbing my balls i like how scary this sloth looks you can only pick one choose wisely a cat girlfriend she loves you monkey spins well obviously you choose the monkey because like it spins the cat girlfriend she might love you but how do you know it's not like a real cat that's just your girlfriend now come on man

Channel: EzPz

Views: 221,027

Keywords: reddit, reddit top posts, reddit best posts, reddit top posts of all time, top posts of all time, top posts, best posts, posts, reddit posts, reddit funny, r/, subreddit, top all time, reddit true stories, dankmemes, compilation

Id: oGmZkdfZqWE

Length: 53min 35sec (3215 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 01 2022