The Best Jobs for Lazy People - AskReddit

i spend most afternoons watching netflix or playing video games what's the best job for a lazy person i worked as a security guard for a trucking company on the weekends the rest of the company conveniently didn't work weekend so i had the whole place to myself i worked 12-hour days and walked around a small wing of the property every hour and documented anything that was out of the ordinary almost nothing was ever out of the ordinary other than that i didn't do anything it was actually really boring because the guard house was outside of the wi-fi area so i blew through my phone data really fast to cure the boredom and ease my phone bill i bought a portable dvd player and watched every dvd i had i used to go to the factory where they make giant rotating machinery for power plant generators it would take a week or more to machine these giant discs and the machinist just sat there watching this giant computer-operated machine do all the work if an error popped up the machine would stop sound an alarm on the computer and the machinist would pick up the phone and call an engineer to come fix it also they didn't do any of the removal or setup that was done by a team of engineers and transport folks thirty dollars per hour i majored in physics learned sql after college i got hired as a data analyst i just under three years ago i am now the most senior analyst on my team tied with my manager i get all of the high visibility reports and i have automated all of them with windows task scheduler 75 of my workday in the office i try to look busy i work from home twice a week and spend most afternoons watching netflix or playing video games also it's great time to do laundry i'm a backstage doorman at a broadway theater i sit around watching netflix and hulu and all that stuff all day if i'm feeling ambitious i'll read a book or write some stand-up material it's a pretty sweet gig and perfect for the laziest of people the person that sits on a chair in the museum they just sit there in one of the most quiet places i visit and when a person stands to close to 10n artwork they just cough a little and tell you to step back i had this job at a fairly popular museum my duties included clicking a counter every time someone came in and telling them not to touch the art i wanted to basically die after a while a guy on the surveying crew has the job of watching a surveying gps unit all day he gets dropped off with the unit sets it up and sits there and makes sure it doesn't get stolen and that the blue light is still on that's all he does every day day after day he thinks his job is the greatest thing ever a lot of id related office jobs at big companies involve a lot of downtime for one reason or another where you're just sitting around waiting for work to come in be careful what you wish for i did a six-month work placement at a place doing qc on medical data entry it was as riveting as it sounds and due to poor management there were massive stretches of time like more than a solid week where there was nothing for us to do we were literally begging for work because we were so bored if someone had asked me to start hovering the carpets i would have jumped at the chance toll booth worker in middle school i had a classmate who did a four-week internship at a company where they send him to the gate man we had some forms to fill for our report in school and this guy just wrote the most awesome stories the gate man had to tell about his job my favorite was when i'm bored and i am damn often bored i act entitled and punish those drivers who ring the bell angrily i then let them wait for an extra 20 seconds before i let them in answering my classmates question what was the most critical situation at your job the gate man said i once went to the toilet it was one of these boring friday afternoons where nobody comes in as folks are home early when i came back i found one of our customers with his whole entourage queuing up at the gate three vehicles i dropped my newspaper and hit that gate open button like it could save my life and boy at did they just drove past my booth lucky me and that's the story when my bowel movement almost cost me my job sysadmin i hate my life i've automated 85 of my job i'd be shocked if i worked more than four hours on an average week it sounds great but it's boring sitting here surfing tomorrow's reddit today someone replied had a job like that in change management i think i might have had two hours a week of work i leveled up a lot of characters in a lot of different mmos during that time luckily doing sysadmin for an msp now never a dull day because these idiots are like most at companies sell equipment for triple the cost make sure that you don't have a big enough team for what you're selling and have your salespeople promise things to clients that you can't make happen but ask your guys anyhow good thing i love my job and get paid pretty well my job i'm basically ignored by everyone and wasting all my day on reddit i'm starting to wonder how long it will last i'm working for a plumbing contractor as a project manager but 95 of stuff is managed on site so they don't need me most of the time i have this huge office with multiple monitors and nobody can see or want to know what i do so i wait for the phone calls and place some orders here and there and read it all day the salary is 65k per year cad get an office job figure out how to do it in a fraction of the time coast for a couple of years when a co-worker quits tell your boss that you can add their responsibilities to yours instead of hiring a new person for a 40 raise figure out how to do that in a fraction of the time get all your work done every day and also spend hours on reddit bonus literally nobody else knows how to do your job so they'll think long and hard before downsizing you it helps if you understand excel or whatever your office uses more than anybody else in the company [Music] i worked at a pool this summer after my senior year of high school i wasn't a lifeguard i just had to have the person show me their navy card to get in the pool and i had to check the ph levels of the pool at the end of every day only had to text my boss could be on my phone the whole day chilled with my then girlfriend and ate food didn't even have to clock out for lunch and got an extra half an hour every day the downside was working in the hot sun you'd be under an umbrella but the job could get boring hurricane debris cleanup crew safety monitor this won't apply to you unless you live in a place where you are hit by hurricanes at least once a year and don't minding working 12-hour days 7 days a week i promise you that 10 of those 12 hours per day will be spent sitting there doing nothing playing games on your phone if the battery lasts long enough i switched to crossword puzzles to try and save my battery keep in mind this job only exists immediately after a hurricane hits and then for about four to five months afterwards depending on the strength of the hurricane you will get time and a half on the final 44 hours of the week so you essentially get paid for the work of someone who is too decent entry-level jobs without actually performing anywhere near that amount of work in combat arms infantry artillery armor etc a significant portion of a soldier's time is spent on standby waiting for something to happen this could range from waiting in an airfield for two days for your unit's flight to waiting for a couple of hours for the enemy to enter your ambush site entire units will spend their whole deployment in reserve in regions that could become hostile at a moment's notice but have nothing to do until it does essentially the soldier's job is to be ready for a fight much more than it is to actually do the fighting there's a ton of downtime in the military my job i make the ballistic fiber that goes in bulletproof vests i basically just watch movies and play on my phone all day long while the machine runs as long as everything goes smoothly i have around five minutes of work to do every hour and a half whenever the machines is ready to run new packages and i'm on break half of the day too because we do one hour on the floor then swap out with our relief for an hour so every other hour you're on break for an hour and i have a two hour lunch i make thirty dollars and 23 cents an hour and all the overtime i want i'm currently working as a companion for rich old folks with early stage dementia their kids feel guilty for not spending time with them so they pay me too much to go to the old folks home every day hang out drive their fancy cars and go out for lunch most don't wake up till after midday so i do whatever i want all morning my old guy now likes to go to this expensive restaurant every day for lunch full on three courses with a bottle of wine which to be honest has become a bit much for me every few days i send the kids a happy smiley pic of the old timer having a good time and they get the warm fuzzes i'll drive the jaguar rolls get them a paper but don't do any personal care at all it's a sweet gig i once had a job that required maybe 10 minutes of work a day essentially it was my job to rent people mobility scooters i'd sit in a small room surrounded by different colored scooters and i just read or watch movies with my feet up because we had maybe two to four customers a day if a person came in for a scooter i'd ask for their name and postcode write it down on a piece of paper and give them the keys when they came back usually an hour or two later i'd charge the scooter by just plugging it in that's all the entire job the work really slowed when the local government started charging for the formally free service then i'd maybe see three people a week and they paid me eight pounds per hour one time i had a sweet gig as an overnight caregiver for a sweet old lady neighbor of my mom's friend she lives alone is around 90 super mentally and physically with it she just gets scared at night and likes the company i would go over it around 8 p.m watch dancing with the stars or whatever with her discuss current events and would usually end up going to bed before her at around 11 she didn't mind as long as i was in the house i would wake up and have breakfast with her then leave around seven or eight the next morning she paid 100 a night i did this for a while when i was preparing for my nclex and for a bit after i passed i had to leave because i got a job as a camp nurse and then i ended up moving and getting a real job so i didn't try to get that job back i hope she's still alive and that someone else is filling in as well as i did they were some pretty big lazy shoes to fill working at a visitors center along an interstate my buddy works at one along i-15 and he just sits in a chair and points things out on a map to people all day he basically is on one long break he steps out back whenever no one is around and toki shazi pen so basically he sits in an air-conditioned little room and tells people where cool spots are and fun things to do on their trip plus you get to meet all sorts of interesting and creepy people all while being baked off his butt lifeguard at a retirement complex i did this every summer throughout high school and university and never once did i have to intervene or do anything my regular clientele consisted of four old ladies who would meet each morning to chat in sunbathe and one very fit old dude who would swim laps at the end of the day i suppose it would have been more work if any emergencies had actually happened though early in my career i was a county adult probation officer i got assigned to a town of 3000 people the local justice court wanted their own po assigned and the judge wanted me to live in the town it was slow to say the least but my last year was almost work free the average po has a caseload of 60 to 80 probationers i had two and i'd see them once a month with seeing them in office a once a month home visit documenting my efforts and court i worked maybe five hours per month my boss said i could stay home if i wanted but i had to have my cell on for a year i probably put in less than 60 hours of actual work i used to work for a juvenile delinquent camp my job was to sit in or by the cabin overnight and make sure none of the kids ran off the job requirement consisted of radioing in once an hour writing no issues or latrine on each kid's log sheet and keeping yourself awake it paid 50 more than a fast food job and as long as you did the job you could do pretty much whatever you wanted the rest of the time biggest catch was there was no power and up to a half mile hike to the cabin we have a specific security guard we've had for 13 plus years now and he is pretty useless the security guard lives there and has a tv he watches telenovelas most of the time all he does is open the gate and doesn't even bother to even inspect though since according to his logic 99 of people who can afford a car aren't bad harmful people he doesn't ask names or house numbers just opens the gate whenever he sees a car anyone can come in if they have a car he doesn't even inspect faces and do you know the worst part when moving into the privata you are supplied with your own control remote the gates are also automatic field engineer hear me out field engineers are often salaried and are given territories with a list of things that need to be completed as well as their due dates and barring a few emergency call-outs that's the full scope of their work or if they're of the flavor of fay that i am energy distribution they do global work but only have seasons where they are busy and occasionally deal with call-outs during off-season so as a field engineer you spend a few months out of the year busting your butt and working long days and once the busy time ends you sit at home for weeks and play video games or do whatever you want while collecting a paycheck i just spent the past 12 days binge watching dragon ball z replaying persona 5 and storyboarding my webcomic you can't really be lazy until you actually become a field engineer though something about being responsible for multi-million dollar equipment and such security guard i've been on reddit the whole shift just to answer a few questions it's a shipyard facility during the day it's checking out bags and cars coming in and out giving temporary passes and few phone calls night shift what can i say reddit cable tv or heroes 3 on my old laptop work schedule day shift night shift then 2 days off thanks for listening to radio tts hit the subscribe button and activate the notification bell for more videos about the best jobs on the planet click the right box for the career advice playlist let us know in the comments what you think about these stories

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Keywords: reddit, reddit stories, best of reddit, askreddit, reddit story, ask reddit, reddit cringe, askreddit funny, reddit funny, r/askreddit, top posts, reddit best, r/, reddit top posts, askreddit top posts, reddit top post, radio tts jobs lazy, best job for lazy person reddit, jobs where you do nothing reddit, paid to do nothing reddit, doing nothing at work reddit, job for someone lazy, Jobs, Careers

Id: eZdZELSdjbs

Length: 14min 48sec (888 seconds)

Published: Sat Dec 05 2020