Good morning, everybody, and welcome to an
incredibly nerdy side project. If you've watched any of my videos, you might be aware of two
things: #1, I like to play video games in release order. #2 I've played literally any Kingdom
Hearts games. Kingdom Hearts is a game franchise whose proper play order is slightly contentious.
Recently, I got multiple videos in my recommended feed claiming to have divine knowledge of the
correct order. Both of them were astronomically wrong in completely different directions.
If somebody wants to get into Kingdom Hearts and doesn't know where to start, they'll
inevitably follow one of these lists and thus play the games wrong, or, even worse,
just play whatever they feel like and have *fun*. Nobody deserves to have fun. Even when I
actively tried to play the games in order myself, I ended up making some critical mistakes. That's
where this video comes in: now that I've actually played every single almost all of the entries in
the Kingdom Hearts series, I've come up with my own play order. If I somehow had the ability
to erase my memory of this entire franchise, this is the list I'd leave for myself. If you want
to play Kingdom Hearts and you want play it right, this video will spell out step by step the correct
way to do it. And if you've already played Kingdom Hearts, you probably did it wrong and this
video will serve to inform you of your sins.
Before getting into the actual list, there's
some general ground rules to keep in mind:
First, as always, we're going in release order. If
two games are on the list and one came out before the other, we're playing the one that came out
before the other before the other. This is how I recommend playing any game franchise, but I
must stress that it's especially recommended for Kingdom Hearts. Almost every Kingdom Hearts
game assumes that the player has both played every prior Kingdom Hearts game and not played
every future Kingdom Hearts game. Inevitably, they'll make reference to a prior game under the
assumption the player knows what's being talked about, or make reference to a future game under
the assumption the player does not know what's being talked about. Even if the game technically
takes place five years before the prior game, there's always a scene where the characters go
"So, about that plan we had for me to pretend to be a duck for five years and then shockingly
decapitate that there Mickey fella?"
Now, don't assume that just because this list is
in release order you can just look at a series release date list and call it a day. Kingdom
Hearts is not that simple. Remember how I said I personally played Kingdom Hearts out of order?
I was actively trying to go in release order, religiously studying the release dates,
and I still got it wrong. If you tell ten random passerby to write down the
Kingdom Hearts series in release order, you'll get five different answers.
The other five will get a DNF.
In summary, Rule 1: we're going in
the ungoogleable release order.
Rule 2: for the purposes of this list, alternative
versions of games are considered the same entry, and it's always recommended you play the version
with the most content. Kingdom Hearts 1, for example, on the Playstation 2 alone, has at least
3 versions with distinctly different content. It's not technically possible to see all content with
a single version of any game, but some versions are just gonna have to be good enough.
Rule 3: extended Kingdom Hearts media is not considered in this list. You don't have
to read the Kingdom Hearts manga, or watch the Kingdom Hearts cartoon animatic, or go stay
at a luxury Kingdom Hearts hotel. Pinky swear, the only Kingdom Heartsing you'll have to do is
the Kingdom Heartsing that exists in the realm of video games, and even then, I don't count cameos.
If Kingdom Hearts isn't particularly significant to the game's identity, it's not a Kingdom Hearts
game. You do not need to play Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for the Nintendo Switch to play Kingdom
Hearts 4. Sorry, I have at least some sanity.
With the rules set, let's
get this list started.
#1. There should be no surprises here. The only
way to start your Kingdom Hearts journey is to play Kingdom Hearts. Hey wait, look, do I spy an
asterisk? Oh silly me, that's not an asterisk, that's the signature hairstyle of famous Final
Fantasy character Cloud Strife. And look at that other asterisk he's hanging out with: it's famous
character Hercules from the Hercules series!
What was I thinking? I forgot to mention Rule
#4: separate from this list you must read all prerequisite reading material. Before you can
even consider playing Kingdom Hearts, you have to play every single prior Final Fantasy game,
and watch every single prior Disney movie! "But Miss Gamerchamp! You just said you don't
have to play Super Smash Bros. Ultimate for the Nintendo Switch to play Kingdom Hearts 4!"
That's because it's extended media. There's a big difference between extended media based on Kingdom
Hearts, and prerequisite reading material Kingdom Hearts is based on. Kingdom Hearts appearing in
Super Smash Bros. Ultimate makes Super Smash Bros. Ultimate extended Kingdom Hearts media, but
it also makes Kingdom Hearts required reading material for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. In the
same way, Disney's Hercules appearing in Kingdom Hearts makes Disney's Hercules required
reading material for Kingdom Hearts.
Now, I won't actually be including all the
prerequisite reading material on this list. It would be way too long if I did, and I know
realistically most of you aren't gonna go out of your way to watch a dozen movies and short film
series to play one video game. But even if you can't resist dipping into Kingdom Hearts early,
may I suggest a cheesy cheat code? The way I like to do it is I play a Kingdom Hearts game until
reaching a new Disney world whose movie I haven't seen yet. Then I turn the game off and go watch
the movie. Once the movie's over, I get to play through the Kingdom Hearts rendition with it fresh
in my mind, and confident I'll have literally any idea what's going on. That trick obviously won't
work for Final Fantasy, whose rep is less clearly segmented, so you're just gonna have to play
them all. I will not be making that video.
With an extremely short detour done,
let's get back to the list.
#1 - Kingdom Hearts, specifically Final Mix.
I will note, if you want the authentic first game experience, and happen to know Japanese, you
should go for the PS2 version of Final Mix. The HD releases changed up the controls in a significant
way, and swapped out both the textures and music. It's not enough to make it a separate entry, but
it does give the game a distinctly different feel and deceptively de-ages it. I personally think
a game's age is inherently part of its identity, so you won't really know what Kingdom
Hearts 1 is if you play any version off the PS2. The same applies to all the games
that were included in I.5 and II.5 ReMix.
#2 - Kingdom Hearts
V-Cast! Hahaha! If you didn't see this one coming, nice to meet you,
my name's Gamerchamp! I keep watching all these Kingdom Hearts play order videos and none of them
even mention the second Kingdom Hearts game.
"But Miss Gamerchamp, Kingdom Hearts
V-Cast isn't even canon, ga-huh!"
I didn't say this list would be the canon order.
I don't see why canonicity should be relevant. If you want to play all the Kingdom Hearts games,
you have to play all the Kingdom Hearts games.
"Oh but Miss Gamerchamp, Kingdom Hearts V-Cast
isn't even playable except on really old obscure phones! Um, uh, what does the Mickey go...
gu-huh?" Oh, so just because the game is hard to play means you don't have to play it?
Fans are already hard at work getting the game running in an emulator, and have actually
gotten it working for the most part. Go help them out and legally acquire the entire
game, yes, including the Wonderland episode, and play it, it's that simple.
Once you've done that, you can move on to Game #3. But #4 and #5 will
have to be explained simultaneously, so we'll reveal them all in a batch.
#3 - Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories for the Game Boy Advance
#4 - Kingdom Hearts 2: Final Mix
and #5 - Kingdom Hearts Re:Chain of Memories.
"But Miss Gamerchamp, you said we wouldn't have to play the same game more than once! Why
would we play Chain of Memories twice? Why did I choose Chip 'n Dale, I don't
think they voice them like this."
That's the thing. You're not gonna play Chain
of Memories twice. You're going to play Chain of Memories and Re:Chain of Memories. Chain of
Memories and Re:Chain of Memories are not the same video game. This isn't a Final Mix situation.
With Final Mix, things are often reworked a bit, but anybody can look at footage of both versions
and recognize them as the same game. Depending on how familiar they are they may not even notice
that they're different versions. When comparing Chain and Re:Chain, do I have to explain how
these are different video games? I will anyway, on the left is a 2D beat-em-up, and on the
right is a 3D hack-n-slash. My mom could tell the difference, and she doesn't even know
what a beat-em-up or a hack-n-slash are. Hi Mom, love you! These are different video games of
different genres. This is one of my biggest pet peeves in video game culture: remakes are not
interchangeable with the games they're based on. Would that fly in any other artistic medium?
Would you tell someone "Aw, no, you don't gotta go look at the old Mona Lisa. They just released an
improved 3D Mona Lisa." The narrative is similar, and the gameplay makes use of similar ideas,
but actually playing the game is a completely different experience. Chain of Memories is one of
my favorite video games of all time. Re:Chain of Memories is one of my least favorite video games
of all time. If you want to play every Kingdom Hearts game, you have to play every Kingdom Hearts
game, and these are Kingdom Hearts games.
So, to reiterate: you play the third game, Chain
of Memories, the fourth game Kingdom Hearts 2, specifically Final Mix, then the fifth game
Re:Chain of Memories. Small note of trivia, Re:Chain of Memories was originally a
pack-in bonus with the Special Edition version of Kingdom Hearts 2: Final Mix. You
could argue that means Kingdom Hearts 2: Final Mix inherently contains Re:Chain of
Memories, making them a single entry on the list, but I decided not to be crazy today.
Now that you know remakes are considered separate entries, the next step in the list might
seem obvious. But seems can be deseeming. Time to throw in...
a Twister.
#6: The World Ends With You. Yes, I am completely
100% serious. If you want to play Kingdom Hearts in order, you have to play The World Ends
With You. And I'm not just saying TWEWY is prerequisite reading material because it makes
some silly little cameo. No no no, TWEWY is on this list as a numbered entry. I'm genuinely, for
real, making the argument that TWEWY is an actual real for real real Kingdom Hearts game!
The World Ends With You was developed as a cooperative effort between the Kingdom Hearts team
at Square-Enix and Jupiter. Gosh, that Jupiter logo is real familiar. Let's see, what else did
Jupiter make? There was Pokemon Pinball, there was the Picross series, uh, there was another game of
theirs I really liked, what was it... oh, oh yeah: Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories. TWEWY was the
Kingdom Hearts team's second collaboration with Jupiter, going into development immediately after
their prior collab on Chain of Memories. In fact, TWEWY was originally envisioned as a new Chain
of Memories where the card gameplay and the action gameplay were separated between the top and
bottom screens. When development actually started, this weirdo two-games-at-the-same-time Chain of
Memories ended up taking the form of a new IP. But even that new IP still breaths Kingdom
Hearts DNA. The general meta gameplay idea, of playing two games at the same time, directly
originates from the Chain of Memories action cardplay. You've still got card game inspired
gameplay on the top screen. You've got enemies that are the physical manifestation of social
anxiety, you've got a story that takes the concept of friendship and fully explores
it in the most anime JRPG way possible. The sprites even *look* like Chain of Memories
sequel sprites! I don't care if it happened to drop the Kingdom Hearts branding, that's a silly
little unimportant piece of trivia for nerds. The World Ends With You is Chain of Memories 2,
and that makes it a Kingdom Hearts game.
As you can probably guess if you know anything
about TWEWY, the Final Remix version is nonviable. They literally removed one of the
two games you play simultaneously. Seriously, it's one of the biggest downgrades I have ever
seen in a supposedly definitive version. They didn't just remove half the content, they
kept all the content but removed half of the video game part of the video game. Of course,
since Final Remix includes bonus story content, it can't be ignored entirely, and then you've got
Neo TWEWY to worry about. But I'll let you handle that conundrum; they won't be included directly
on this list since they sort of splintered away enough that I'd call them extended media, but you
can add them in manually if you feel like it.
With TWEWY done, we can move back to
the games that are actually branded Kingdom Hearts. Taking into account I've already
established remakes are separate entries,
#7 is Kingdom Hearts coded,
Pre-Install Episode
#8 is Kingdom Hearts: 358/2 Days
#8.1 is Kingdom Hearts coded, Episodes 1 through 7
#9 is Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep Final Mix
and #9.1 is Kingdom Hearts coded Episode 8
That's right baby, things are finally getting weird! I'm sure most of you are aware Kingdom
Hearts Re:coded is a remake of a Japan-only mobile phone game, but slightly less of you
realize that Japan-only mobile phone game was released episodically. Other Kingdom Hearts
games came out inbetween the releases of these episodes. And that's not just a silly piece of
trivia. coded, Days, and Birth By Sleep were all announced simultaneously as a cross-platform
Kingdom Hearts sandwich, with coded in particular acting as the bread that keeps it all together.
To account for this, we separate the individual episodes of coded, which isn't as complicated
as it sounds. You just barely start coded, play the entirety of 358/2 Days,
play almost the entirety of coded, play the entirety of BBS, and see the finale
to this trilogy in coded's final episode.
Unfortunately, following in V Cast's footsteps,
coded was only released on crappy old phones, and this time it went for extra credit and
released exclusively on crappy old Japanese phones. So, while it's explicitly required
you play it episodically between Days and BBS, you won't. You won't play it at all.
You're just not that good a person.
Luckily, if you want to be a slightly less bad
person you could settle for the unforgivable sin of watching a Let's Play. All the footage you see
here is a Let's Play by NicoNico user Hatosuke, who covers the game's story from beginning to
end, with an asterisk. She does not seem to have covered the Pre-Install episode, which was
basically a demo but did have unique content. There were two episodes in the Pre-Install
Episode: a Traverse Town one, and a Coliseum one. The Coliseum episode thankfully has its
own longplay uploaded to Youtube by 13th Vessel, with English subtitles. In fact, if you're
willing to put in a little bit of effort, you can even run the Coliseum episode
in an emulator and play it yourself, though it apparently isn't fully functional in
said emulator. The Coliseum episode also genuinely has an important nugget of Kingdom Hearts
lore in it, revealing a piece of trivia that is particularly symbolically relevant going into
358/2 Days. Don't even think about skipping it.
The Traverse Town Episode, on the other hand,
only has a partial video record. What we can see in the video suggests it was essentially
a shortened version of Episodes 1 and 2. I'm not completely certain how this should
be handled, since obviously I don't know what specifically is in this missing chunk,
but my very reluctant recommendation is to temporarily throw this list out the window,
and watch the Episode 1 and 2 parts of the main game playthrough as a substitute.
It's also worth noting that the Let's Play is unfortunately untranslated. It might be a fun
project someday to edit the remake's script onto this Let's Play so people could finally at
least watch the original coded in English, but I am far too lazy for that.
By the way, random fun fact, you know what's messed up? Hatosuke's Let's Play is like
the only record of coded on the internet, and Part 1 has a single like. She is a Kingdom Hearts
hero, preserving what otherwise would have been a completely lost game, and one person liked that.
Well, there's only one way to change things.
Anyway, back to the list: #10 or something,
it's somewhere in the middle or whatever, you have to play Kingdom Hearts Mobile. I think it
may have gotten periodic updates like coded did, but it's really difficult to do research on since
not only was Kingdom Hearts Mobile Japan-only, it's fully explicitly lost media. So screw
it, I'm not going to do any research into the correct order to play all its minigames,
that's your responsibility after you legally purchase the Square-Enix corporation and thus
legally acquire all their super confidential lost games. Don't think about skipping it, Kingdom
Hearts Mobile genuinely has an important place in the Kingdom Hearts play order. The artstyle
for its avatars is a re-occuring artstyle in the Kingdom Hearts franchise. In fact, it reoccurs
outside the Kingdom Hearts franchise, but we're gonna dodge that particular rabbithole. I'm also
being forced against my will to note that there are several other tie-in browser games and
the like which I'd consider extended media and will not be including on this list. Kingdom
Hearts Mobile just barely qualifies thanks to the Avatars and its direct connection to coded.
#11 - With games 1 through 10 done, the 11th will be familiar: Kingdom Hearts Re:coded. You
may have maybe possibly been convinced to play coded in episodic order, but gotten a silly
little idea that you'd fudge the numbers a bit and instead of playing the virtually unplayable
original coded, you'd skip ahead to Re:coded, playing the remake's chapters in the same order
you'd optimally play the original's chapters. I must be explicitly clear that such jumping around
the timeline is not an option. While the narrative might make sense if you substitute Re:coded into
the timeline early, gameplay is another story. Kingdom Hearts Re:coded fully dismantles coded's
original gameplay and replaces it with a system based on the gameplay seen in both 358/2 Days
and BBS. Meaning, from a gameplay perspective, Re:coded is an explicit sequel. I consider the
progression of the video game parts of the video game just as important as the narrative parts.
Re:coded's gameplay takes place after 358/2 Days' and BBS's gameplay, and is thus a spoiler for both
of them. Sorry, you're just going to have to play the crappy old crappy phone game that is literally
unplayable, and save Re:coded for later.
One little note that I almost
forgot, #11.1: Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep Final Mix Secret Episode. I can't
show any footage because it's major spoilers, but this episode was specifically added to Final
Mix, which came out after Re:coded. There is of course other new content added to Final Mix, but
it's ingrained into the main campaign so the only perfect solution would be to have both vanilla BBS
and Final Mix BBS on the list in their entirety, which is a little much even for me. The Secret
Episode on the other hand is clearly delineated from the main game, so you're free to wait until
the proper point in the timeline to play it.
I should also note that the PSP version
of Final Mix is the definitive version, containing a robust set of multiplayer modes.
The later HD releases kept all these modes, but removed the multiplayer functionality.
Finally, with the codedverse past us, the list can start getting back
to some semblance of normalcy.
#12: Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance,
or alternatively, Kingdom Hearts HD: Dream Drop Distance. Similar to BBS, all multiplayer
functionality was removed in the HD version, in addition to a plethora of general gameplay
changes. I'll leave the ultimate decision of which to play, or if you'll play both, in your hands.
Now that we've played a single game in a vaguely normal capacity, back to hell!
#13: Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days 1080p 4k HD Full Game Movie. In layman's terms, that
means the cutscene compilation included in I.5 HD Remix. Yes, I'm serious. Even though you
already played the video game of 358/2 Days, you have to watch the 1080p 4k HD Full Game
Movie. Like come on, look at this cutscene in the original game, then look at the same cutscene
in the 1080p 4k HD Full Game Movie, and tell me they're the same experience with a straight face.
Of important note, you cannot play Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days 1080p 4k HD Full Game Movie PS3, it
must be Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days 1080p 4k HD Full Game Movie on any other platform. There's an
exclusive new cutscene the PS3 version was never graced with. Technically that cutscene wasn't
released until after other games in the series, but I'll let that slide since it is ultimately
just another alternative version of the same "game" in quotation marks.
#14:
SPOILER WARNING! Turns out, it is literally
impossible to tell you the correct order to play the next few Kingdom Hearts games without spoiling
the biggest plot twist in one of those games, and one of the biggest plot twists in video game
history. That's right, this entire video was a secret sequel to the Metal Gear one, I wasn't
even planning for things to get this meta. Just like with Metal Gear, it seems like the majority
of people, even those who played the game with the twist, aren't even aware of it. This is a
huge hot potato in the Kingdom Hearts franchise: everybody gets this aspect of the Kingdom Hearts
play order wrong, and it's impossible to correct the misinformation because then you'd be spreading
gigantic spoilers. But if I didn't include this giant spoiler, you'd definitely end up playing
the games in the wrong order and missing the giant plot twist in the first place. Remember when
I said I personally played the Kingdom Hearts series out of order despite following a release
order list? This was my most critical failure, and I speak from experience that you must play
these games in the order I'm about to tell you.
Here's how we're gonna do things. If you trust
me, if you really believe that I genuinely want people to play Kingdom Hearts in
the order I'd want to play it myself, and you don't want any more details, head to the
timestamp shown on-screen, and simply follow the listed order in the spreadsheet linked below. But
if you've got doubts, go ahead and watch this next section. Maybe I might manage to convince
you by going into more spoilery detail.
#14 is... Kingdom Hearts χ. I need to be very explicitly clear: you must play the Japan-only
lost media browser game Kingdom Hearts χ, and not a completely different video game.
I'll go into full detail as to why in a bit, though the spoiler warning probably
made it a dead giveaway. Until then, let's get something out of the way real quick.
#15: Kingdom Hearts Re:coded 1080p 4k HD Full Game Movie. Unlike the 358/2 Days movie, this one
isn't just for watching the cutscenes with fancier particle effects: they added a new cutscene to the
cutscene compilation that is actually genuinely important in the overarching narrative, so even
if you don't care about the fancier polygons you cannot skip watching the movie. Although
hypothetically it'd be super easy to google Kingdom Hearts Re:coded scene 49, but what kind of
evil monster would pirate video game cutscenes?
With that completely unnecessary detour
done, we can take off our very coincidental eyepatches and play the spoilerrific
#16: Kingdom Hearts: Unchained χ, and Kingdom Hearts Union χ[Cross]. Despite
having two distinctly different titles, these are functionally the same game. Unchained χ
is the earlier chapters, and Union χ[Cross] is the later chapters. Now, you might be wondering why
in the heck I told you to play Kingdom Hearts χ instead of the mobile port, and now I'm suddenly
telling you to play the mobile port. After all, look at it! We already established that you
don't have to play every single port, and this is literally just a mobile port of Kingdom
Hearts χ! It's *marketed* as a mobile port of Kingdom Hearts χ! Golly gee, sure would be a huge
plot twist if this were a sequel, wouldn't it?
Here's the gigantic huge unavoidable spoiler:
Kingdom Hearts Unchained χ is not a port, or a remake, or a remaster, or an alternative version
of Kingdom Hearts χ. Kingdom Hearts Unchained χ is a *sequel* to Kingdom Hearts χ! And I don't mean
in some weirdo spiritual successor bullcrap sense, for once I literally mean it is a sequel in the
same way that anybody who hears the word "sequel" would assume: Kingdom Hearts Unchained χ's plot
takes place after Kingdom Hearts χ's plot. That may seem like it couldn't possibly be the case:
you're seemingly seeing the same cutscenes. Aladdin is telling super sexy canon main character
gamer girl Gamerchamp to go eat seemingly the same rats. But seems can be deseeming. Unchained χ is
a sequel intentionally disguised as a port. The game's very nature as a sequel is a plot twist
in the narrative. Unfortunately, since the game it's a sequel to was Japan-exclusive, the plot
twist went over most English-speaking players' heads. Which is a ridiculously huge shame: if
you play Unchained χ without playing vanilla χ, while you will see the in-universe repititions of
most of χ's cutscenes, the plot twist is the ones you won't see. Kingdom Hearts χ contains one of
the most important, most emotional story moments in all of Kingdom Hearts. Its effects ripple
through every single other game in the franchise, except V Cast, and the majority of Kingdom Hearts
players have never seen it because nobody puts χ in the play order. Except sort of, because there's
another asterisk, they ported some critical missing moments of χ into Union χ[Cross] many
years down the line as a noncanon Bonus Quest. But it was a little late, completely removed from
its original context with zero explanation of what the player was watching, and they didn't even
port the entire thing, destroying the point.
Now, obviously, χ is currently lost media so it'll
be a little difficult to play without corporate takeover strats. Unchained χ Union χ[Cross] isn't
technically lost media, it's still officially available and you can go download it on your phone
right now, but the last couple patches removed all the video game parts and shifted its genre into
cutscene compilation. Hilariously useless cutscene compilation. The cutscenes aren't sorted by
the order they play in the original game, they're sorted by the *location* the cutscene
takes place in. You'll go from a cutscene of John Hearts saying "Hello everybody, I am not
Kingdom Hearts" immediately into a cutscene of John Hearts walking into the room mortally
wounded mumbling "Ah jeez, I can't believe they found out I was Kingdom John." Anybody who
actually wants to watch the story play out in any intelligible order should avoid this thing at
all costs. Though at least it's not a genuinely immoral literal slot machine for children now.
Thankfully, fans have done longplays of both the original χ and Unchained Union χ[Cross], so you
can at least watch them being played in their entirety. And unlike coded, they're in far better
quality, and all of χ's cutscenes have been fully translated into English. I particularly
recommend the longplays done by Everglow: they're what I watched for χ personally, and
my only complaint is they made the immoral choice not to play as super sexy canon
main character gamer girl Gamerchamp.
Now that we've gotten through the gigantic
spoilers, we can finally move on to number seven- just kidding. χ and Unchained χ... weren't
just video games. They weren't just video games, were they? They were EPISODIC video
games, weren't they? Oh dear god, coded was just the warm-up round! We have to
play χ and Unchained χ Union χ[Cross] alongside the games that came out inbetween. In fact, we
have to play Kingdom Hearts χ alongside Kingdom Hearts Unchained χ because Unchained χ starting
releasing before vanilla χ had finished. They were really committed to selling the twist.
Now, while you absolutely have to wibble wobble inbetween these games, this video would get
incredibly difficult to follow if I went through every single step out loud. So just know that
#14 is Kingdom Hearts χ.
#15 is Kingdom Hearts Re:coded
1080p 4k HD Full Game Movie.
#15.1 is Kingdom Hearts χ,
#16 is Kingdom Hearts Unchained χ, and then there's a fifty mile long list of wibble
wobblying decimal digits as you go back and forth from χ and Unchained χ. This list took me
way too long, and I know for a fact you're going to ignore it. You're welcome.
The process of swapping between χ and Unchained χ ends with the release of χ's
ending. From there, you can play Unchained χ exclusively up until Story Quest 645,
which was released simultaneously with
#17 - Kingdom Hearts 0.2 Birth
By Sleep A Fragmentary Passage
and #18 - Kingdom Hearts χ Back Cover.
These two were a pack-in bonus with the low depth version of Dream Drop Distance. Since
0.2 and Back Cover came out at the same time, the specific play order can be mixed and matched.
I must also note that Kingdom Hearts χ Back Cover, despite technically containing a couple remade
χ cutscenes, is *not* a cutscene compilation, which is one of the saddest and funniest pieces
of Kingdom Hearts trivia. Everybody just assumed since the prior two HD collections had a cutscene
compilation in 'em, this χ movie must be a cutscene compilation. Nope! It's a movie! It's
literally an actual Kingdom Hearts movie! I mean it still kinda feels like a cutscene compilation,
but that's because it's a movie made by people whose job is to make video game cutscenes,
they're just working with what they got.
With that done, we move into #18.1,
a long session with Unchained χ, now officially rebranded Union χ[cross]. After,
it's finally time for the game you ostensibly waited 14 years for. #19 - Kingdom Hearts
VR Experience! But sorry, you can only play a little chunk of it, because VR Experience
was also released episodically.
In the middle, you'll have to play #20: some
stupid little indie spinoff by the name of Kingdom Hearts III. But don't think just
because it's a numbered title that means it's just a video game and you can sit down and
play it like a video game: Kingdom Hearts III was released episodically. You are not permitted
to touch the ReMind DLC for another year.
#20.1 and 20.2 and 20.3 and 20.4 and 20.5,
you'll wibble wobble back and forth between Union χ[Cross], the second half of VR Experience,
and the good part of Kingdom Hearts 3.
Then, Game #21 - Kingdom Hearts: Dark
Road. An important note, Dark Road was released within the Union χ[Cross] app, but
it is a completely separate game. There are significantly less weirdos who think Union
χ[Cross] and Dark Road are the same game, but I have met at least one such weirdo so it's
important to clarify. Oh, and by the way: Kingdom Hearts Dark Road was released episodically.
You'll only be playing Episodes 1, 2, and 3.
After, you'll play #22: Kingdom Hearts: Melody
of Memory. Beyond all odds, Melody of Memory is genuinely just a video game where you play it,
and it's done. There is an exclusive free-for-all local multiplayer mode in the Switch version, but
literally no human being has ever touched it and you're under no obligation to be the first. After
that rhythm excursion, you go back to Dark Road, finishing it in its entirety, and... oh! What a
surprise! You are now caught up to this video's release date, and ready to play Kingdom Hearts
Missing Link releasing later this year. That's it. This is the Kingdom Hearts play order.
Just as simple as everybody says, isn't it?
But wait a second. I can't help but feel like
I've missed a small little detail. Does the gameplay of Melody of Memory maybe look
a little familiar? Melody of Memory...
is a Theatrhythm game, made by the same
developers, featuring the same gameplay, it is a Theatrhythm sequel! Meaning it has
the prerequisite reading material of each prior Theatrhythm game. Hey, wait a second,
Theatrhtyhm is based on Final Fantasy isn't it? Good thing you already played all the Final
Fantasy games, otherwise that could have been a big- oh what's this? Theatrhythm Dragon Quest. I
guess before Melody of Memory you'll have to play every single Dragon Quest game! That's only like
a couple hundred video games, no big deal. Oh hey, what's this? What's this mysterious video
game that came out literally days before Theatrhythm Dragon Quest? Dragon Quest Heroes?
Gosh, this hack-n-slash strategy gameplay looks really familiar, doesn't it? Oh right, Dragon
Quest Heroes was developed by Omega Force. It is Dragon Quest Musou! You might know the
Musou franchise by its localized name, Dynasty Warriors. Dynasty Warriors has done a couple
crossovers. Before you can play Melody of Memory, you'll have to play every Zelda game! You have to
play every Ninja Gaiden and Dead or Alive game! You have read Fist of the North Star! You have
to read One Piece! You have watch every single Gundam anime! At this point why stop at Dragon
Quest Heroes' release? You are far too deep! You have to read Berserk! You have to play every Fire
Emblem! Did you know Fire Emblem is a spiritual spinoff of Advance Wars? Gotta get on that! Fire
Emblem crossed over with Shin Megami Tensei, guess you're playing Persona now! Oh wait you were
already playing Persona cuz they did one of those! Fun fact, the first Megami Tensei is actually a
licensed game based on the third in a trilogy of light novels. You're gonna have to read those!
And obviously before any of that you have to read the fourteenth century Chinese historical
fiction novel Romance of the Three Kingdoms specifically with the intention of playing the
dumb stupid Kingdom Hearts rhythm game spinoff!
Melody of Memory opened up an infinite number
of cans of infinite worms, right when we were at the finish line! Would you believe I've wanted
to make a video explaining how to play the Musou franchise for years, and then I make this Kingdom
Hearts video instead, only to discover at the last second that oh wait, it's the same video?
But obviously, none of that is technically going on the list. It's just prerequisite reading
material. I simply could not resist.
Once again, if you believe you're the chosen
one, the first genuine human being to correctly play Kingdom Hearts, the spreadsheet is linked in
the description and pinned comment below. Plus, when new Kingdom Hearts games come out, or, god
forbid, somebody points out I made a mistake, I'll update the spreadsheet. Hello, potential
new Kingdom Hearts fans of the year 2034, I'm so sorry about Kingdom Hearts V, but at least
you know to play it after Kingdom Hearts VI.
With the list done, there's one last thing I
want to stress. This list is not a joke. I'm not making fun of Kingdom Hearts. Kingdom Hearts has a
million different spinoffs on a million different consoles, and almost every single one of them is
important in the overarching narrative. I love that! I already try to play every game series
in release order! Every handheld card game, every crappy mobile tie-in, every godforsaken
slot machine simulator for children. I've gotten incredibly used to random spinoffs
that have nothing to do with anything, which are lucky to even get a wink wink nudge
nudge in mainline releases. But when I play a new Kingdom Hearts game, I can always be
confident that it will be a Kingdom Hearts game. The handheld card game has hands down the
best storytelling of any entry in the series, the crappy mobile tie-in can't help but genuinely
tie itself in, the immoral slot machine simulator for children has the most complex narrative
of any entry in the series with like two dozen characters all acting out their super secret
machinations simultaneously, and whose impact on the numbered titles is both explicitly clear
and yet to even be conclusively determined. People joke about Kingdom Hearts' spinoffs specifically
because Kingdom Hearts is brave enough to have spinoffs that aren't a joke. The most special
part of Kingdom Hearts is that every part of Kingdom Hearts is special, and I would never
recommend anybody skip a single moment of it. Special thanks to all
Patreon backers, including
Let me know how much this video sucks and
the actually truly for real reals truly correct play order in the comments below.
Kongming is my boy, and get out of my house.
