Thanksgiving Got Wild

what are you doing paint it on you me all right ready go charlie oh what god i thought you just got your finger oh baby wait wait it's extremely cool baby that's hot as [ __ ] without just some friends making thanksgiving what do you want to tell them about first well we're making thanksgiving food i guess and uh that's as far as i know i guess we should get it we'll get the yeah the turkey's going to take the longest right all right so find something to put here you want me to show them the bird yeah sure we got a prized bird oh god damn raised with nothing but antibiotics yes this is perfect it's an antibiotic bird i know i'm just oh i didn't tell them a temperature or anything for the future yeah i got you so is there like a preheat button or what's up with that i think i just need a pot first right yes there's like a pan maybe no that wouldn't make any sense so much no i think apartments i just need a receptacle to put the turkey oh you're going to use powdered gloves to touch a turkey they're not powdered oh powder-free nitrile example you're right these were made for turkey you did call them turkey gloves so you're probably right this bad boy and i put it right there all right that was a bad start oh god okay she's carrying a little water that's poisonous okay a bit swampy no it actually smells good do we have any like turkey scientists in here is it supposed to be like all brownies it doesn't smell good so charlie when you cook the turkey and it's ready that will pop out gotcha well you didn't know that either man you called it a nipple piece i didn't actually think it was a nipple here chelsea check that out look look at what's going on in there that's the prince yeah it's the business end of what the turkey mats what's all in there are you going to take yeah take the gibbs yeah a lot of the dribble it's not a good business we call them the jibs in the business you just gotta really get in there oh is that not connected to the giblets i think that's connected to the giblets isn't it i mean it could rip out its spine like a mortal combat fatality i guess right here i'll pull open her legs so there's kind of like yeah just really don't be afraid to think we pull this that's what i thought let me yeah you hold something's coming out the plastic is tearing i think maybe that's not connected to the giblets maybe this bag in here oh yeah the frozen giblets are right there oh yeah you get in there and get those out it didn't come with a tutorial for some reason just really get in there my hands imagine you're i think i'm gonna i got the jibs oh my god it's a thanksgiving miracle you want to make a wish yeah that's exactly what i was worried about are there's more jibs there's a lot of chips in there you get those chips they're uncovered let them cook a turkey in the microwave if he wants to no what are you doing what was that thought process i thought if i tilted it over they fall out remember that one guy who was a trooper he warmed up a turkey with slaps oh true we could just i don't it's poisonous just don't like it we've already had like water splash back on me oh god it's fun it's burning [ __ ] out of my hands go in you piece of [ __ ] stop complaining man it's thanksgiving right what am i thankful for my hands are on fire that's just a block of ice oh it's perfect i told you it would fit wonderfully please keep all arms and legs inside the vehicle all right all right now i'm going to wash my hands right you know what the problem is he knows he doesn't have to eat any of this right we should one time make you make what do you need yes i ate my parm chicken last night you couldn't eat your parmesan yeah it was impossible yeah but i ate a piece of it that was edible and i loved it danny i thought it was great that's going wild right now with the butter aren't they yeah this is no they're saying that's great you're saying no i eyeballed about a cup all right we're giving him too much help he's got a recipe go ahead charles make your butter gotta paint it on a little bit that's what the directions said right yes paint it on obviously you should probably just stick one put one stick in there for good measurable well it said it literally says to in this step it said uh you will use the remaining fresh herbs for stuffing inside the cavity of the turkey maybe this is a bad recipe it's making me look dumb wait chelsea you're white if you think this is how all white people cook turkeys because charlie stewart it's actually pretty classic technique i wonder what percent of the chats think you're joking are right you mean charlie's ability to cook a turkey i'm pretty good at it terrible if it was up to me there would be no seasoning on this [ __ ] thing i just throw it in the oven call it a day it is up to you this is your turkey i put the butter in its ass and i'm throwing it in oh yeah that stick of butter we're using is like a surfboard underneath them is gonna be really really nice i think yeah i think so too it's good oh my god that looks are you getting this chelsea look how good that looks amazing well i i didn't send it to you guys i could send them to you people are not [ __ ] no no why what happened i don't send them on this part they're saying no seasoning no tin foil what the [ __ ] are they doing that's all that's all a myth but that you know who needs we we don't need tin foil because charlie set it to 400 instead of 325 yes it really seeps in quicker so you're going to lift up the turkey why do you only have cookie sheets i don't cook caleb what do you mean should you not figure that out i know it looks like a rainbow fooling you i get this all right how close are we what's your favorite thanksgiving memory charles uh before covid when like my aunt and uncle would come over uncle larry had the craziest stories to tell andrew also used to come over i remember hearing that from andrew he would but his stories never have an ending so he'll start something that makes no sense he'll be like yes and he lives on a farm so he's like yeah i was riding my lawnmower around my neighbors or [ __ ] so i saw them out one day and that's the that's that's the end of his whole story perfect you never like there's never a climax or a conclusion it's just like yeah i was doing this yep perfect yeah that's [ __ ] great it's just like a perpetual cliffhanger every time he tells a story i'm actually very proud of him right now he's doing really well but there's a crucial stuff coming up here soon that i'm really waiting to see what he does i'm good at improvising these yeah no i don't think you have a [Laughter] [Applause] there you go that's a big boy there's a spoon he's winning we're doing this might be the best dish charlie's ever made it's also the only dish i've ever made with directions you just made a turkey with instructions and you skipped all of them i didn't have instruction that that wasn't those weren't it's still up easy no fuss thanksgiving turkey that's not a real recipe though you made it hard and fussy it was terrible that's not a real recipe this is her doing it here she's looking good it's never been happy 20 minutes i bet it's pretty close he did do the math you ready for turkey action yeah it's not going to be good enough i just want to pull it open you lose 20 of the heat every time you open it no i know but it's going to be [ __ ] like when you were younger and your mom was like charlie go clean the dishes that's how you did it and then she never made you do the dishes again wait did your mom ever make you do the dishes i used to love to do the dishes that actually makes sense i used to love it he's cleaning the thing yeah if she was like charlie go dirty the dishes oh my god no no yeah what are you doing do the dishes he throws them all away that's why he always uses paper just throw him on the floor all right we forgot this is what dana's eating later the mashed potatoes that's what it's about but that's fine it wasn't a bad purpose are you ready yeah i got you so i baked for 25 minutes and then it let's go start a timer no we don't need that i'll keep track of my head okay all right yeah you start one but i won't tell you don't tell them yeah just take it out is there an extra watch no no no you both have three you ready and then i'll insert one somewhere are you ready to do part of this stuff the hard part was giving them values okay all right yeah so sorry we need three between us one of us i think one of us starts with two so you you me all right ready go and meet and boom they didn't catch a single one that worked really well i think we were right on the cusp though ready oh oh i'm not throwing we're just you just let that hit the ground okay we're just playing catch at this point just work very well oh i'm not rolling my hands were moving but the potatoes weren't leaving uh did you set a time this is what it's all about just some friends making thanksgiving you're trying to break it in half a quarter that way that's probably good enough oh my god i thought i could get it i don't dress a cutting board i've literally never heard myself i know everyone's freaking out well that knife doesn't work what no i'm fine i have good technique that's how it's supposed to be that was absolutely close to you he grabbed the potato like this and then charlie's weakness tends to be the oven i think you're wrong that's true the turkey went wrong before it when it sounds like the first thing we cooked in the oven but he does make a fire burrito my burritos are dead i bet that i bet it's true now keep in mind that only uses the microwave of course fill up a warm sour cream did you do sour cream before or after the microwave before really you heat up sorry i'm choking up the whole thing baby you're not joking better is warm sour cream and cream and water i'm just gonna say do you heat up the guac too absolutely oh my god oh lord ready add potatoes and cook until tender but still firm about 15 minutes get those papa's in there 240. oh god yeah i don't want it to splash at me but i also don't feel like getting a utensil to make this easier do it here it's going to be a bigger carry here just hold it there oh good enough i was like if he was about to come down i was going to let him pull out well we could put it wait wait put it back in put it back in come on charles casserole's wow now he's garnishing him so these onions are the crunchy onions because they weren't baked that's right but the only thing i liked was my grandma's beans let's go to sam all right grandma's bean that's good [Music] one letter not even slicing the green beans yeah he decided to go with a natural slurp them like like spaghetti it's a rustic approach like some hole then in a small saucepan i'm heating up butter and milk that looked yummy yeah you did a good job i've never been this proud of you before i definitely thought i did a good job check the turkey all right you want to get a little trick get in here it's going to look good i can already see it by opening it yeah oh she's golden like a marshmallow it does have a little color they say a good turkey is the color of a marshmallow did you want to try your green bean casserole well when it cools off yeah i thought we were all going to try it all right everyone come try my green beans be careful with the glass touched it to see the temperature and burn my finger awesome broccoli in the microwave beans make me lean back what does that mean what does that mean i just followed the directions as they were written i think we're missing the soy sauce a little bit for some flavor yeah there's some some salt in there we're not salted we didn't i mean you put a little bit yeah the soy sauce is like charlie took this little shaker and put me once yeah i did two squirts yeah i can confirm he at the end corrected and did two you're gonna really like the chunks out of chocolate this is literally one here for my birthday instead of a cake i had a green bean casserole what is wrong with your bird are you okay no that's like every vegetarian's dream on thanksgiving is green bean casserole the best dish it really is oh wait till you try that i'm excited it's gonna ruin everything it's actually really guys it's not that bad it's a solid seat no it's not bad it just tastes like green beans that's what i said what everybody's eating eating it don't throw it away are you actually gonna finish it i'm well yeah i mean i'm not gonna pick it myself i'd be so happy if you guys actually hate it i mean it's not bad i'm sitting here eating it it's really not that's so i'm so tired look at what happens when you make food edible we eat it all right they're probably not soft enough they're not soft at all but i'm going turbo mode all right that was pretty good well the the milk will help too they're definitely not heated all the way through no they're not even close well some of the pieces are about three size times the size that's the other way yeah why did we take them off of boiling wrestlers i am chomping the [ __ ] out of these [ __ ] that's supposed to be a little stiff you know of milk yeah let's get some more and that's what we're doing ready yeah sure yeah all right stop that oh whoa just [ __ ] dump it oh baby wait wait no that's hot please don't mash hard enough that it sprays they're starting to really soften up now this lube the gears that's a jackhammer we are actually making great progress here that's what i was saying then i'll go in there with my fists and start looking pretty man whatever you put it on the floor and like steps it up like grapes smashing video oh man you're entering a new level that's much speed i've got 25 years of practice that's looking good look pretty good oh there's a piece nice i thought you could hide [Music] is the chicken okay let me check on that chicken chicken it was a chicken it would have been done four years yeah it smells good you can smell the apple actually yeah were you a fan of baked apples oh yeah [Music] it's looking like a normal turkey because that's exactly what it is i did not [ __ ] it up it's just a turkey that's going to taste like [ __ ] but it's not going to be poisonous though unrelated if anyone's hungry i wouldn't be opposed to ordering food either a whole thing of green green casserole here what do you mean it's creamy casserole yeah there's so much like i said i'm kind of full oh you're well we need this turkey dog yeah the turkey needs to finish cooking and then charlie's going to tell us a story uh the first thanksgiving tell us about it well you don't want to know about it it's it's a gruesome tale why well you know the pilgrims weren't really known for their hospitality especially not with christopher columbus in the mix that guy was it that guy what a that guy was a real [ __ ] let's check on the turkey this is how we compensate for it being at 400 we open it every 20 minutes whoa it's probably ready to eat well we have it open we should baste it so far his basting option was an ice cream scoop all right i'll get it up all right yeah who wants to see some basting that's going to be baked in the sheet it's going to be great all right you want something smaller no yeah just [Music] throwing the juices yeah all right let me get your something smaller this is so dangerous alternatively you could take it out and just turn it over until that's the worst i can get away from the oven you're scaring me speaking of which guys do not measuring turkeys like this look at that gloss all right danny do your thing all right i'm getting it night sweet prince see you in the morning i'm pretty satisfied overall me too we crushed it my mouth is watering are we actually going to waste all that good meat nope it's just going to take a long time to cook you just have like tupperware baby food is that what that is but what no it's soup it's squash oh yeah yeah of course butternut squash you idiot yeah yeah what do you mean sorry you got 14 tupperware bowls of soup in there excuse me that's good soup he actually dips do you guys want me to make you a burrito make us a burrito show us yeah your pounded burrito tip your main cooking technique wash your hands first yeah show us your burritos all right i'll show you the standard burrito oops yeah of course that you're making it's a little thanksgiving burrito can you tell us where in like the first thanksgiving story the burrito fits in well christopher columbus is a big burrito guy i always knew it yeah dude it's simple it's not exciting and that's it i did it that's the burrito that's a good burrito yes microwave sour cream and guac i don't know why people are acting like it's like a bit of hot walk to tie the burrito together i'm excited to try it it's called the moisturita it's genuinely just a basic burrito i don't know why this heated sour cream thing is like an artificially made debate super normal have you absolutely apparently not if it really is you got me a burrito from chipotle once and the sour cream was in the burrito they don't eat it it's a big tub of cold sour cream that they sell everything at the end and everything is hot in the burrito right which means the sour cream on hot things but you don't heat it up but it still gets hot it's the same result to be fair and it is the exact same result he just likes to play devil's advocate when he's oh because because it's true it's just totally normal do do a pull making my abuela [Music] extremely oh baby that's hot as [ __ ] that's why you let it cool off i was joking like oh it's going to be warm that burned the [ __ ] out of my house very hot so i microwaved the burrito oh my god i should have basted it yeah should we check on the turkey water yeah let's see how it's doing let's give it a little look-see it's about the same color as three hours ago no that's looking good like i've never had a single person that was like my favorite things the turkey yeah turkey [ __ ] sucks let's be honest let's get a little cross-section here okay let's see smells good because it is good oh you got the tail end that's going to be that looks like a good mix there though it is a good mix that looks really good all right it's going to be pretty hot i might i know it's actually i might it's real hot in my hands here all right here we go exactly and it's really good very very good see i told you this whole debate on heated sour cream cringe is a lie what else in the burrito it's ground chicken red and green bell peppers onions all chopped and then i believe a little cayenne so he did like it he went for round two that is true there's like a burrito exactly do it no no the whole thing yeah yeah you should put it in a burrito in the microwave that is such a bad ratio that's just a little bit of meat no oh yeah so thanksgiving burrito a guac cheese oh baby we should turn on the turtle turn on the where's the fan fan it's the butter it's the butter burger the the smoke merits marinates in the turkey get that turkey out of the oven okay please please be careful doing this yes no we're not going to move it yet just closed happy thanksgiving why aren't they taking it out what's wrong there's a big there's nothing wrong no it's good we're just yeah admiring it safety first just in case there was a bond plant in it i guess yeah we're waiting for the bomb squad to come check it out do you guys have any cool thanksgiving turkeys or stories i have one right here stories to tell will we wait for the turkey i feel like i'm having four five if you count today thanksgivings this year four yeah wow sounds awful do you have any other really good thanksgiving stories no i don't have anything interesting thanksgiving's one of the most underwhelming holidays in the world what about black friday stories those that's also super underwhelming i go out every while i used to go out every black friday just to see if i could watch a fight but everyone's super like behaved oh that's your idea this is a horrible idea this was not my original one yeah technical pretty cool oh yeah now you're really flying you'll cruise through it now man you think you're better than me yes that's going to be a game changer yeah the sillier this idea because it's a pretty good so listen it's not that silly when you listen to me you just grab the turkey okay careful you said grab the turkey get it and then slit like spike it like a little ball and then throw it like a discus see that was so easy and dinner is served that actually looks really well cooked are we sure the thing didn't pop out yet i think it just needs a little more time all right so now it looks like it fell it's a two tone it looks like it fell asleep like a black and white cookie what do you want yeah that's the head dude or it's you didn't cut the head here lift the turkey a little no let me stuff it under it it's the umbilical cord let it take a nap this is all right we've defrosted it now now we can cook it now we can cook it we did it you know this will let me cook if you want to rip it off it honestly looks pretty good it really does happy thanksgiving everyone [Music] let's go all right bye everyone

Channel: penguinz0

Views: 694,049

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Id: p5g-L6SgRZg

Length: 28min 15sec (1695 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 26 2021