Stranded Offline

the following is a real footage of a man with no internet be aware that some of what you're about to see is disturbing viewer discretion is advised we're off the grid today no internet you never realize all the great things that you can't do until your Internet's actually gone I can't do star stable I can't do roblox I can't do toontown rewritten I don't even know what else there is in life but what do you do there's no internet you got to make a video how do you get around that I can't even google you ah T 90s I mean it still gives us things that we can do and this this is pretty even know how to hey there we go okay I don't think I've ever made of this far as a game this is probably something that you would have bought for like a hundred dollars back on the Atari and nowadays it's just a built-in web browser offline thing but as a metaphor it's actually kind of deep you see this dinosaur maybe it's a raptor maybe it's a Tyrannosaurus patter and it represents you know we're in the desert off the grid there's nothing here for us just clouds that guy but we can't stop and talk we're on a mission mission to make a video no internet and we got work to do and we can't stop and talk and it's nighttime and I didn't choose this I didn't know it did this just unlocked a really cool Easter egg can't play battlefield one can't play overwatch can't play and even though I had this can't plant or tail I just played these I can't do two videos on that but one after the other that be unheard of what do I have here what is this I have no idea what this is all right that was cool can always go back to the simple things in life like drawing at the very least sometimes you have to embrace your creativity to have fun this is one of those times see is not a good idea to let me get bored because I do some things I probably shouldn't do as you can see I do some pretty terrible things I've tried seeking therapy but at this point I'm I'm probably a little too far gone that's pretty sure you need to internet to sign up for that kind of thing so I don't always do things too crazy I mean windows used to have built-in games like solitaire I know you remember space pinball if you ever played that I don't know how to get to things like that anymore which is kind of upsetting do I have this I have this why do I have this okay no I'm not coming on consenting you do not have my consent please go away there's other games on here there has to be microsoft solitaire collection money maybe I was alone on this but you ever remember back in the day when you just you didn't have anything yeah of any good games to play or you were probably young and really picky and didn't want to play any of the games you had so you would you play these these games you play yourself some solitaire and that's about all that Windows had mine sleep does it minesweeper on here minecraft I didn't know I had that I don't mind sleeper you've got to be kidding me that's a classic you don't have Windows without minesweeper I am so good at this actually can't believe I bet that long oh you know what actually yes I have all the windows oh man I get a Stelter for this every time I start up last time I started up my windows 98 virtual machine was when I did sonic schoolhouse do I have the disk for that oh my gosh do I have this on here still okay this program has performed in illegal operation and will be shut down that's little intense okay I still have sonic schoolhouse and it's somewhere in this mess of everything that I refuse to organize [Music] oh did not think I'd beat hmm it's actually little bit heavy I think I'd be digging this thing out again that's broken that mint-condition sonic schoolhouse it's beautiful all right I don't even know if it's still set to run from the VM that answers that question why am I playing this again I can't click on it it's been too long Sonic good to see you again good to see you whether Sonic good to see you third Sonic by the way I don't think good to see you is the correct salutation Let Me In Sonic dude I have my drug money not going it did he erase all my data yeah yeah I don't have anything well forget this I did want to take a trip back in no I didn't but it's kind of kind of good to come back here and kind of just normalize this yes just going through and clicking on all these is just making it's it's taking away the power of this the stock meme started from my my sonic schoolhouse video and I was trying to this guy was Snoke I named I named him stock and everybody just started calling Sonic's knock so I just kind of went with it but this is the original stock right here this freak of nature I will applaud this game for putting me in the credits I feel like that's that's something games don't do that anymore remember wouldn't you be Mario 64 in Mario's like thank you so much for putting my game in other days it's just like good job beat the game wait by the DLC see these old offline games sometimes we need the internet to be taken away from us to really appreciate these old things oh I do have XP didn't that have space pinball on it unable to find virtual machine ok did Emmy have that it's not even there either I do with them no I don't have a nice over this one doggone it well no space pinball today I'm not upset it's fine well we could do some dark forces I guess [Music] sounds like one of those like tin whistle remixes that you would hear when someone's making a dank meme compilation oh my gosh spaceship thing dark forces you know how lit this opening screen would have been back in the ms-dos days all right so I actually have a game I was playing through this and I don't remember why I stopped but I oh gosh this mouse Moff rebus Ribbit's oh this mission oh my gosh I hate it with a passion so if you think it's hard to see because these textures have about one pixel per million pixels on my monitor just look at all the hidden gaps and stuff like you can't even see these from half the angles this one's all about platforming and finally good aim here and no you can't look up and down so I'm taking blind leaps of faith here and trying to figure out where my distancing is with these jumps I didn't know that was a platformer my eye is hurt trying to look that deep into the screen to snipe that guy you stink at life hey you die it does have a little bit of an auto aim considering I physically and technically am unable to aim upward can I go down here oh there's a bunch of guys don't go down hmm get owned that butt though Hey nananananana it turned on who's shootin is doing your little cubbyhole here I can't look down to see these things know how to crouch see you shoot to see if you like seizures thing my eyes are actually dying right now I cast on here do i okay for those of you who haven't played this game it is the most underrated Star Wars game of all time look how many saves I have oh my gosh like most people I love Star Wars Battlefront I loved Rogue Squadron all the games in the series I thought were really good Republic Commando is fantastic but this game like gets nothing I never hear people talk about this game being a great Star Wars game I've probably done this first mission a hundred times don't you dare say that these characters look creepy because they don't they're beautiful okay this this is where it's at this was for me this reminded me a lot of a mixture of Metroid Prime you can hear the stormtroopers talking that's so cool while the game was kind of a mixture of like all kinds of really fun genres it's obviously a first-person shooter tip the Imperials key it's like a puzzle game you have to figure out how to get places which kind of reminds me of Zelda and there's a lot of platforming too which reminds me of Metroid Prime hey there guys don't worry I can't okay okay relax Jan save me please see this took me forever to find out you just you blow this thing up and then you go down here and that's how you progress there's all kinds of things like this it's kind of cryptic but it's really rewarding when you actually figure things out that thing you have to turn off or else you die as soon as it going here and if you don't know that you can save your game you are going to be in for a lot of restarting I'll admit this game has its problems everything being so cryptic in terms of the puzzles and the fact that it really doesn't hold your hand much it makes it really hard but it's super satisfying makes it well I feel like nobody has time to play harder games nowadays and so they always go for these easier newer games everything becomes more casual and then we just kind of lose track of how good it feels when you actually accomplish something in really difficult games one of the reasons I'm super excited about cuphead because yeah I like the art style like anybody else does but I also just love how it's a really hard game everyone's playing it and people are Oh case in point uh I feel like people are kind of getting back into that realization that hard games can still really be fun there's nothing wrong with easy games either I love like linear games that hold your hands and bring you on some kind of adventure but you just gotta remember both sides well that was fun I got other Jedi Knights games too but they're not quite as good and I'm just gonna be done with Star Wars for the day well I hate playing this and I ain't playing this oh I know something we can do actually maybe I don't even know I still have this let me check yes sock the Hedgehog 3d oh my gosh I haven't played this in so long I actually played through this entire game on my channel once the videos are probably private now okay it's mighty oh my gosh this is probably one of the better Sonic fan games I've played honestly have pretty good story the hand-drawn stuff is pretty good it looks like knuckles is a partner for this one I forgot he follows you around oh my gosh skills so many skills reminds me a little bit of Sonic Adventure a little bit of Sonic oh six a little bit of fan game so it's not perfect but I mean my teeth looks a little bit goofy I ain't complaining too much though there's the end boom mighty got through act 1 and got to Chaos Emeralds tougher I'm doing that alright though that's kind of cool to go back and play schoolhouse in that game and she had I nights sonic forces like those games I get really busy sometimes I don't have time to appreciate things like that well that's probably everything that I have to play offline so well if you're expecting more from this video but that's it I don't have internet so yeah [Music] how am I gonna upload this [Music]

Channel: Peter Knetter

Views: 4,091,122

Rating: 4.8641577 out of 5

Keywords: internet, no internet, offline, comedy, reaction, vlog, windows games, star wars dark forces, star wars, jedi knights, pc game, sonic, sega, sonic fan game, sonic the hedgehog 3d, solitaire, rendom games, game compilation, facecam, review, rant, funny moments, funtage, montage, commentary

Id: G0M-8DgK8k4

Length: 14min 38sec (878 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 17 2017

Reddit Comments

[u/AsheBOiiI]

Patter da tatter

[u/12345ayden]

Thasssssss steeeaaaaalllliiiiing.

....upvotes