Spiritual Perspective – Tony Samara: Fear and Freedom

hello and welcome to studio 12 today we are going to talk about fear and freedom both very much a part of our lives have you ever asked yourself what is fear is it a feeling and emotion and experience and where does it reside in our minds in our bodies and what is freedom why do we yearn for it and most importantly how do we get there we're going to discuss these topics with a spiritual teacher and author Tony Samara donee welcome to the show thank you I'm happy to be here let us start by oh we would really like to know what is your definition of fear yeah I think fear is a very interesting topic especially today and where we are facing all sorts of interesting challenges in the world and fear is difficult to define because we don't like it so we push it aside that I believe it to be and something that affects the physiology of our body our brain and creates a constriction in behaving or acting in a intelligent way towards whatever it is that we're facing so we are compromised in our attitude and our feeling in our approach to a situation and this was important previously you know is the fight-or-flight reaction to situations that we have to deal with and but life is more complex so fear becomes I believe subconscious and we have all sorts of thoughts and feelings that we are afraid of that we push aside and don't want to face and hence we have a buildup of fear reactions in our body known as stress and anxiety which is very common today in the world and we just don't know what to do with it but it's there and we have to deal with it and usually the way we deal with it is through forgetting who we truly are in this moment and pushing aside the qualities that make us beautiful human beings in the desperate hope that we can get away from this stress or painful situation which is supposedly somewhere but it's actually inside of ourselves so we can't get away because it's there so that's my definition up there um if someone is walking the spiritual path what do you believe the function of fear is on his or her path is it something to overcome or is it something that is always going to be a part of our lives and we're just we can just advance in how to deal with fear I think it's important to ground oneself and understand that fear is a physiological reaction so we have to deal with it in a real way you know it's not no good pushing aside the fact that the body is uncomfortable with stress and there are some very specific approaches to dealing with that and one is meditation which I teach here in Ljubljana in the school of meditation and that is how to deal with whatever is inside of yourself in a way that is more healthy so the first step is saying okay I have this anxiety inside of myself what what can I do with it you can't push it aside which is what most people do I have to find something that helps this anxiety relax and so meditation is a step by step process whereby we relaxed the physio no physiological aspects of the body that are stressed in very beautiful easy step-by-step ways that anyone can learn I wish people would teach this to children because they're so enjoyable and so simple and once learned is like riding a bicycle it becomes automated so this is the first step relax the physiological part of your physical being so that the fight and flight reaction that normally happens in the body isn't overwhelming you and once you do this then you can connect more deeply to parts of yourself that are really being communicated in ways to approach such a physiological reaction that is positive so yes then we have something to learn from here we we learn to empower ourselves and not be enslaved by the reactions that are based usually on the outside that then create an internal reaction where we are empowered to see that we can change our reality no matter what is going on even if the stress and the body is so bad that it makes us want to run away from ourselves or from whatever threat the tiger lion that is out there and and once we understand this we can we have more energy that is free to go deeper into communicating to what is really creating this situation and usually it is an attitude so I believe that fear helps us understand our attitude towards life so there is a learning yeah so if we are facing a fear with a certain situation for example a new job or a project or something would you say that fear is challenging us to overcome it and go in that direction or can it also be like a warning sign to go in another direction I understand what you're saying and I think the first thing to do is to understand if your attitude is negative because most people don't really see this because of course it's difficult to see things about yourself but a lot of what creates the reality on the outside is our own attitude and if we bring fear into the job for example if we're anxious because we look at the situation and think I'm not good I'm a victim to my own sense of can I manage to do the job in a way that people will be happy about or will respect me because I'm doing a good job and if the negative attitude of self-criticism or doubting or victimizing yourself pushes you to see things in a negative perspective then that attitude already will have so much energy it will create a negative on the outside so perhaps it is a warning but maybe the warning is not so much about the job this is what you have to establish first it's about you know maybe you are being challenged to open up to a part of yourself that is not victim that is not fair that is not an attitude of self-criticism so when you begin to do this and there is a process of doing this in a way that is very like meditation is very easy to learn and once applied becomes a habit and then you can see is my intuition still telling me that the job is a negative because sometimes we are intuitive people as we are and we have subtle senses that pick up on things that the mind doesn't quite understand and we sense that we are choosing the job not because we want to choose the job but because perhaps there is a program in our mind that says how you have to work doing something because you have all these commitments and things that you have to look after and work is the only way and the only way is to work in a certain hard push yourself down a path that's not really aligned with your higher purpose and you are composed out of obligations to do something so maybe your intuition is letting you know about this and then you can ask yourself is there a better job so it's not to be afraid but to look for something that is aligned with your true purpose in life with your qualities and with your strengths never simple mmm um okay so fear is very much something a tool to discover what lies beneath the fear inside of us but sometimes we live in a society that is the media are filled with titles that are supposed to attract attention and are inducing fear like alerts and you know stuff like that so where is the thin line between being aware of the real threats in the environment for example and making a stop of the negative fears that are sort of attacking us from everywhere yes yes I understand what you're saying and we live in a culture that I believe is fear-based and if you look at history our culture is based on a understanding of the world that comes from religion originally the way we see things means that man dominates the earth dominates its resources because man has to evolve in a way that is strong and powerful and not in cooperation with the energies of therefore the energies inside of oneself so our culture is always imposing this idea that you have to push yourself I believe it to be different I think you have to be in touch with yourself and that is what the true meaning of freedom is when you're in touch with yourself you are able to practice freedom in the world and whatever you are doing in relationship to the earth and its resources but the media has this thing and as you say where there is this subconscious or perhaps more conscious today definition of what life means and that is terrorists losing job economy getting worse be afraid there is a subconscious sort of attitude be afraid because we are living through famine and so our fear-based reactions of survival fight-or-flight overwhelm our sort of conscious way of seeing what is really going on and we get attracted to the negative simply because we are wondering how to resolve it so we listen more to negative news we listen to gossip around us and we disempower our freedom which is of course from inside I believe it is a state of non-attachment so you are free of your attachments to all these negatives that are being put out there not only in the media but even in the way people are reacting to each other nowadays you know there is fear I don't want to lose my job and then you're communicating this to your friend or what will happen if the economy is working in such a way where our company is not doing so well and there's just a whole mass hysteria about you know what we need to do but I believe we don't need to do anything we need to let go of that physiological reaction that creates an attitude of negativity so what to do as you were saying when all these outer states of mind and cultural belief systems are attacking us I believe that we have to be free of them and that is the freedom and to be free of them you have to understand where to go and if you're not out there caught by the manipulations there of whatever fear-based attitudes then you have to come back to be in touch with parts of yourself that empower you to be free and the process of doing that is quite quite a process but it's an enjoyable process because how can you be free if you're caught in fear and how can you be happy if you're caught in fear but if you are connected to what I believe every human being has a space of love and the space of happiness and a space of joy when in connection to everything to the earth its elements and people from that space of freedom than I believe happiness is the natural outcome because we are born happy so we can remain happy if we purify the environment from all these manipulations that you are speaking of we also born free and who or what is the thing or the person stopping us from feeling the freedom that yeah it's easier to answer who's the person stopping us from feeling frayed here and that is usually ourselves and I believe this attitude of self-criticism where we are always trying to be the best or number-one what I call the ego and it is fed by so many aspects outer and inner and to complex perhaps to speak about today but one of the main feeding mechanisms of self-criticism is this sense of trying to be number one trying to be something rather than being yourself and this is a tort attitude and also an emotional mental way of seeing things that is highlighted in social social situations family situations it's highlighted to be in touch with this driving force rather than being in touch with yourself so self-criticism I believe to be the number one reason why you know things are so difficult sorry I've forgotten your question I think self cruising is one of the obstacles from feeling free yeah exactly and you know one way to work with this if if I may um is to bring a positive aspect of yourself into the picture rather than focus on what you want focus on what you are and empower yourself with those aspects that are there that you're not taking notice of and often I ask people to do a simple exercise and just to make it more tangible and that is to find 10 qualities that they love about themselves and most people find it very hard to do this because they're so critical of themselves you know they they are always trying to do things that are beyond any obvious way of dealing with the situation and so to find those qualities I believe to be very important and but people can't usually find that because as you say there are situations outside that are so critical and inside that are so critical that it impedes that freedom to find this more beautiful part of yourself and honor this beautiful part of yourself I am creative I am and able to I'm so good at business or I'm so good at being a teacher or I'm so good at this you know the criticism impedes that and you're always looking outside for something better rather than honoring this part of yourself that is needing honoring to be free so then I say if you can't find 10 aspects of yourself that you love and that you want to explore more deeply by communicating this to people outside of yourself and people inside of yourself your little inner child than you're all all those interesting aspects then ask someone about your qualities and are someone to find 10 qualities that they like about you and that puts the whole perspective in a different setting you can begin to see that freedom is about not looking for something but honoring something that is inside of here and this gives you a map of those qualities that you can appreciate and if you look at those then the fear is not so important because you're looking at those qualities that are coming from inside the subconscious then moves into alignment with those qualities rather than with this fight-or-flight physiological reaction so you begin to feel happier because we are always happy when we're connected to those beautiful aspects of ourselves you know when you are living your purpose in life happiness comes naturally there is no need to try to find it in work when you're happy doing what you're doing and work and people around you tend to be tend to things tend to fall into place you're creating a different reality than a negative attitude so um this is a great exercise for adults to do what about when it comes to children from what you've said it seems it's very important and we that are already aware of the discussion we have here huh so I don't repeat myself what can we do when we are doing dealing with our children or maybe teachers in school to help children develop into a more free people well I believe children to be like very important in society and today they are neglected but they're neglected because people are too busy you know so they're too busy trying to be something that they're not and children learn best by being in front of someone who's doing what they truly are and honoring who they truly are rather than pretending and teachers probably know this and parents know this and but sometimes are too critical and too busy to apply this very simple knowledge of you know teach your child by teaching yourself first and then your child will learn as from the example that you're portraying very clearly to them not just in words or as concepts but in in your action you know so if if you don't have fear then the child will understand okay I can approach the situation differently because my parent is showing me that there is a different way to approach situations and children have fear you know fear is not a is something that is within our evolution because it helped us to survive so we have to learn positive ways of dealing with them and if our parents and social culture approaches fear from a negative that's for children learn and so that information is transmitted subconsciously to children because fear is subconscious so without knowing it parents even though they wish to be positive and they wish to do what is better for the child their real state of mind it is being shown as what it is you know if you're afraid and anxious and staying up at night and worried about this or worried about that your child will pick this up even to the degree where your body is producing pheromones because fear produces physiological reactions in the body and we know scientists know today that there are pheromones that are being transmitted into the environment and not only do you learn subconsciously but you also smell fear this is how native people and animals know when things are wrong because they are being on a subconscious level we don't even realize what's going on we are understanding that a situation is dangerous now if you say to a child look it's okay don't worry but at the same time you're exuding these pheromones or fear because you're stressed and full of anxiety the child will get confused here is my parent telling me one thing but my subconscious is telling me something else this is where we learn to dishonor ourselves because we then get so caught in concepts and the idea of what we want to do rather than being connected to what is really going on and looking at that as you say looking at fear or whatever criticism we have of situations inside or outside as challenge that we can transcend and showing that to our children many people don't do this and children are confused and hence why we have rebellious teenagers and unhappy actually I'm told very unhappy children to the degree where suicide today is very common in many Western cultures where children just feel that there is nowhere to go there is no meaning or purpose behind coming to university and getting life organized in that way where there's just fear the whole basis of creating a life is based on you know you have to do this in case there is a threat out there and there is no joy anymore because there is no honouring in which you are it's a chasing of an idea so yeah I don't know if this answers your question but at least highlight some aspects you know of teaching children through example rather than just words or concepts and when we are creating our life if we're talking about the freedom to create their lives in the Western world in some ways we are much more free nowadays to create and they're like two sort of theories out there one is that we can create whatever we want we create our lives like the secret you know the book and similar theories and then the other theory is that life happens and we cannot control it but we can control our response to life what's your view on that how are we are we I like both theories I don't think either is right or wrong but I do find that the idea of positive thinking to be limited you know it's not the whole story for example I know that some people tell me you know you all you have to do is think your troubles away for example you are afraid you just say there is nothing to be afraid of or I'm not afraid but it doesn't work because we know that the mind as soon as you say I am not already the subconscious aspect of the mind is attached to that I am not part and is seeing the whole process as negative and so even though we are saying positive words the subconscious fear is still there it may seem on the surface to be going away but deep inside what is really causing the disharmony inside of oneself still comes up with excuses to justify its own existence saying for example oh is it really okay because you know it's not clear to me what is being said in words is not clear to me because the subconscious is so very clever it's like a little monkey jumps from one thing to another and some people say oh you have to say it in a more positive way I am calm or I'm free or fear but already the subconscious mind will ask am i fear am i free of fear you know it's clever so I say it's best to go even more deeply and imagine something that is truly positive and that the best is to imagine a quality within yourself that we've been speaking about and highlight that to the subconscious so that the positive aspect of yourself the virtue that you have or the quality that you have becomes highlighted in opposite to the fear that or the criticism or the negativity that is being experienced in that moment and the way we have to do this is very practical we it's not enough to imagine it as a concept or a positive thought we have to begin to sense it so we have to use the senses to smell taste feel the whole experience and this is a process of visualization or meditation which is practiced very very easily I won't go deeply into it just to highlight the specifics and then you can go further and it's not enough just to imagine and feel but it is important to interact with that feeling and bring an active feeling response to the negative that the mind is experiencing or the emotions are experiencing that I believed to be very very useful and that is the secret um I've gone a little bit deeper into you know the way to practice positive thinking and the other was life happens so you might as well how did you put it you might as well just change you are free to to choose your response to what happens yeah and this is more the work that I do and where we look at the qualities within your self human qualities that are forgotten and bring an attitude that's very positive from those qualities rather than trying to change it by bringing in concepts that change the fear-based thought or the fear-based feeling so it's not enough to say just calm but you you have to bring in something from yourself that changes your attitude to the situation and I believe that to be the core you know if you change your response to a situation but it has to be not out of fear you can't just change your response because you say I am not enjoying feeling fear so I just want to feel free or fear it has to be because you go deeper and find a quality that's inside of yourself that says there is a reason not to feel fear because I'm honoring this quality and it comes out in my attitude it comes out in my response to the situation for example calmness you could be just a calm person because you meditate or because you've learnt relaxation techniques or because you are not attached to those situations outside that create fear and that quality empowers you in many situations so your attitude already changes those things that normal people would not even think about changing because they just react to them but because you are calm radio a state of awareness is able to see that you are able you have choices you don't have to react to the situation you can do many more things but how can you have that choice if you'll not come and hence why it is important to find those qualities that give meaning to life and I believe that those qualities are universal so it's not something that is just taught but it's something that is highlighted through inner work and transforming whole paradigms to new paradigms where you can live your life from a state of joy and happiness which I believe you're born with well that's a very nice way to and this short conversation our time is up and thank you very much for this very interesting talk thank you and for you your audience as you heard maybe the best thing to do is to grab a pen and list those 10 qualities that lie within you and make for a very great start of dealing with fear and finding freedom thank you for watching and good bye you you

Channel: Studio12TV

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Id: 4oJMRP9R2LA

Length: 39min 40sec (2380 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 26 2015