Shane Gillis' niece thinks he's "The Whale"

what do I do now and I go I'll watch a YouTube video I know one thing I can do true that's the that's the or eat I'm like a baby I'll eat or I'll feed then you whale out then I am the whale have we have I ever said that on here what my my bastard niece did to me I hate her there was the thumbnail for the whale was on TV at my sister's house of course my sister told me this really oh she just she didn't even say you I wasn't there that's my sister called me to go hey just so you know our [ __ ] three-year-old my three-year-old niece was looking at the television queue and the thumbnail for the whale was on which is just his fat face it looks a lot like me especially no I swear to God if it's just his face and if you're three years old and she goes Uncle Shane I got the phone call and it was like hey just so you know I I thought you were the whale I was like all right well thanks I said for real I was like all right good call I'll talk to you later thanks I haven't talked to you in three weeks I told you I got my belly looks like Peppa Pig's dad because of that I haven't watched that movie you have to watch it I can't watch it dude if I if I think people think I look like the whale look like whale you have to but Zaza thought I did dude dude I don't look like Peppa Google Peppa Pig's dad dude check out Peppa Pig's Dad's belly dude my belly doesn't look like that what the dude the other day we're sitting there and she like rubbed my stomach and she goes what are those bumps I'm like they're pimples why do you have pimp you got to get those off I look like d godam it let me he has a shitty goatee like me if I wore glasses I'd be ruined no you don't look like Peppa she said my belly looks like Peppa Pig's Dad's belly that is your family you got the Peppa Pig family that's why she thinks you look like that cuz the family Dynamic is perfect it's [Music] true I think they want us to wave George [ __ ] go I'm the whale dude I am the I watched the movie and I said that is me he just this is the whales thumbnail you could see it that's not true devastating did you Google it right away when they said no I knew exactly what it was I've seen the thumbnail you got to watch the movie dude I refuse watch you got a Captain Ahab dude you I will never watch that's the wh That's The elusive whale dude you have to watch it dude the open I don't want to spoil it for you the opening scene did you watch the whale no the opening scene is the best opening scene I think of every movie better than Saving Private Ryan and Gladiator 50 times better terrible thing it's it's more I would say it's more hair raising than the reenactment of storming D-Day yeah can I tell you what happens dude the dude is fapping the gay porn right off the bat that's yeah and he starts having a heart attack and someone walks in and he's so fat he can't close his laptop I was on the plane dude dying laughing he's gay wh whale's gay what the I know the whale was gay he's gay makes it worse Z you [ __ ] homophobic yeah he's fat and gay and he's so lazy he just talks about writing all the time he's going to be maybe I didn't even tell I thought I'd told Britney this maybe I didn't tell anyone but that's why I stay in Peak Physical shape so that when I'm not if but when I'm watching gay if someone comes in I go real quick yeah I practice all day I go time time dude he's like and the kid comes in he's like how can I help you and the kid just watches two dudes have sex in the shower and he's like are you okay dude it's the best beginning of any this thing got on here I can't turn it he has his little Grabber he picks everything up with it's the funny maybe I will have to see that is that is significantly more jarring than da oh dude it's crazy yeah but that is good that he's gay it's awesome as far cuz it's a lot easier to find dudes that'll get in there and start you if you're that size he's having a tough time oh he's can't find any Bros no there's no Bros he had a bro that's the whole the whole nature of the movie is he did have a bro and his you think a skinny black dude would come in there and bow him I mean maybe dude probably maybe he thick as [ __ ] he is thick as hell the pizza man now that you say that the pizza man's trying to smash I think is he really the pizza man just leaves two pies first all he do is two pies he leaves two pies on his door Dude too large too large on the doorstep and the pizza man's always like are you okay in there and he's he might be having him on his dick he's always like uh he's trying to like come in the whole movie he's like my name is blah blah blah and he's like thank you my name is he won't face the pizza man at one point he opens the door and the pizza man he wait he like tricks him as if he left and he's waiting he looks at him he's like just grabs his pizza and go can he walk barely okay barely with a walker he can walk with a walker but then he just gets two pies and Goes Ham on them bro I've seen clips of him feeding the feast he feasts at one point he breaks down and feasts and it's like like I was literally like like I there he was jerking off the gay porn and stuff and I was like whatever you started eating I was looking around the airport like or the airplane like I don't want anyone to see yeah that was you hiding your gay that's weird [Music] [Music] how can he not close his computer but he can jack off he set it up got into it's great wh position so he like set it up kind of a little bit get his wh position he put it he put it up I understand he put it up a little bit so he can get like a nice Vantage of it and then he chilled back on the couch he laid back far enough to get he if he had time he could have grabbed his walker stood himself back up but he started having a heart attack no he's saying how can he jack off how can he reach his penis he has to literally they kind of sh he like he's under his stomach just pumping probably feels great that's got to be awesome that's got to be of all the it's like a of all the problems yeah you it is a for he's in veg obviously there's a lot of cons to whing out true I'm might give this thing a shot lat true dude dude it was pretty tight but yeah I he was I guess like the exert you could gream pilot your own thighs oh yeah you could put your belly against right don't you think you could whoa I never thought about that give it a shot I never thought of that'd be kind of nice could be nice might have to chren this house with the thie cream with an exposed old cream pie get walked in on what are you doing out here I'm trying to simulate a cream pie with my stomach and my thighs that'd be nice yeah I guess I guess it was just a pure desire to procreate he just went in he probably had if I had guessed he probably had like a monthl long NOAB Sor up in him and you know they say gay is stronger than fat so his gay impulses are stronger than his fat impulses gay Stronger Yeah the movies movies on airplane really get you I'll watch a I'll watch a movie on airplane but that was one of the best movies ever yeah tell someone about it and they're like that sucked I could have done anything else well everyone was ripping on Frasier for the whale I thought he he was loved for that did he win cuz didn't he cry or something after he kept going around crying everywh yeah every shut up like everybody hated me since the mommy and now I'm a fat gay guy and Everyone likes me [Laughter] again

Channel: ShaneGillisfan

Views: 328,857

Keywords: Comedy, Podcasts, Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast, MSSP, Matt McCuscker, Shane, Comedy Podcast, Matt, Podcast Clips, Podcast edits, Funny edits, Stand-up, Funny, The Whale, Brendan Fraser, A24, Shane's niece thinks he's The Whale

Id: 2UpzMbe7nyM

Length: 8min 23sec (503 seconds)

Published: Mon Oct 23 2023