SCTV Channel - Half Wits Championship!

this is Arthur Andrew Liggett he makes cardboard boxes and tonight with his partner Wesley Wilks a paperboy for the mecklen Gazette would like to make $1,500 in cash if they can defeat their opponents lines Ray Kellogg a housewife who loves working with plasticine and her partner Lawrence Orbach a 38 year old high school graduate who still has dreams of becoming a wealthy psychiatrist and they're all here to play on the championship round of half-wits and now here's the host of Alex Alex Trebek Thank You Johnny Ola and good evening everybody well this is it the exciting championship round of half-wits tonight's show marks the end of a long and particularly difficult season for me personally but let's not dwell on that we will get a winner tonight as you know these four contestants have not had a correct answer since they first appeared on the show a full season ago but we're all feeling optimistic and I'm sure that one of these two teams will emerge the new champions on half-wits tonight so now let's meet the teams [Applause] Arthur Andrew Liggett yes sir and Arthur you've got to be pretty excited tonight oh yes there that's right did you uh did you get any advice from your friends or family yes sir I did and what was that yes sir Arthur you you don't have to call me sir ad no sir I don't I've been doing that all morning calling everybody sir well good luck to you Arthur thank you sir Wesley Wilks and Wesley did you get any advice from anyone down at the mecklen Gazette I sure did Alex don't pick my nose and I think that was it good well uh I'm glad I asked whoa Leigh Kellogg that is correct Alex and Blanche uh what do you plan to do with that $1500 should you win tonight I plan to invest it wisely you play the stock market no I play the guitar but it's still time to invest it free do Blanche that was nice chatting with you and finally Lawrence or Bach right Oh Alex I've always been fond of traveling so I would spend some of the money on plane fare well that's nice to know Lawrence however I was gonna ask you whether you're starting to feel the pressure tonight I was before but since I loosened my belt I'm feeling a lot better thank you Alex then good and those are the contestants and we'll be back with the championship round of half-wits after this much-needed commercial break Oh commercials are coming to pay TV and not soon enough for some people's liking if you're like me you probably watch TV all day and sorry it's a little hot in here under the lights at an average of 18 commercial minutes per hour that's 432 minutes nearly seven hours of valuable time available to you every day thanks to TV commercials what oh I walk too far excuse me good time to make a sandwich read your mail check your answering service feed the dog put baby to bed why even use this amazing metal detector to find valuable buried treasure or maybe you'd rather listen in on private conversations with this with this parabolic microphone or maybe you want to just sit in front of your TV and not move play the converter box like me like an organ flipping from channel to channel watching several TV shows every hour I know I do but I still need commercials they break they break up a program allow me to sneak over to other channels to see what's going on without missing one second of my favorite show if you're like me and I know you undoubtedly are you probably love commercials for their own sake they tell you what's going on out there what products are available what you could buy if you wanted to leave your house but let's face it I don't want to leave my house you're just like me so you're not going anywhere either so sit back relax and don't get mad at pay TV commercials are coming let's face it FM radio didn't last without commercials and pay TV won't make it either now if you'll excuse me I've got some 60 second and 30 second spots to watch how was that was that it take is that a keeper is it welcome back to the championship round of half-wits and for tonight's championship match we the producers and myself had decided to alter the rules of the game instead of using our regular categories we've decided to let our contestants pick their own categories and three mystery items that fall under those categories in the hopes that bringing the game down to its lowest common denominator will ensure the fact that we will indeed get a winner tonight now each contestant will give a series of up to three clues for each mystery item the opposing team will have to guess the mystery item that each clue describes for example if the category is mathematics the clue might be a squared plus B squared equals C squared and the mystery item of course the Pythagorean theorem it's as simple as that now the categories were submitted just before airtime no one has seen them so it should make for an exciting Championship match so let's get started our first ramp it's Wesley Wilks against blind Trey Kellogg and before we start are there any questions yes Arthur yes sir Arthur you had your hand up yes siree well what is it am I at first Arthur I just said Wesley Wilton blintz ray Kellogg are up first and I'm not yes sir you did Arthur please stop calling me sir you don't have to call me sir I'm sure it's getting on everyone's nerves by now okay okay good Wesley you can now flash your category so our viewers at home can see by pressing the red button in front of you things that smell Wesley that that is your category you bet Alex Blanche I'm sorry just do the best you can on this Wesley let's have your first clue you have 30 seconds and go dogs make them mystery item is totally inadmissible we obviously could not show that to our viewers at home please move on to your second mystery item it opens and closes it opens a flower how are you spelling flower especially I don't think it matters an ocean spells that flower has nothing to do with your mystery item and to be fair to Blanche I do think she needs more information the clock is still ticking it opens and closes and is usually a bad looking guy inside our time is up for that round Wesley I must say your clues were particularly bad contestants please keep in mind these are your own categories are your clues must be concise and will finish our first round with Arthur Andrew Liggett pitted against Lawrence or box Oh Arthur please flash your category by pressing the red button in front of you [Music] [Music] different balls is Arthur's category Arthur you have 30 seconds let's have your first clue it's got two different colors I'm sorry Arthur Oh judges say there is no such thing called a red white and blue ball so please move on to your second mystery item um what do you call them yet Nick then wins in a big way Arthur please move on to your second mystery item your second item this is a tricky one a trick ball nope a fair ball Wow obviously getting nowhere ladies and gentlemen I am at this point going to arbitrarily give Laurence and Blanche 50 points which means they are 50 points ahead 50 points closer to the championship than these two over here and we'll now start our second round Laurence he'll be pitted against Wesley Wilks and Laurence the category is yours Alex I always had some trouble with this subject in high school but this year challenge of it maybe pick it as my category tonight just press your red button or it's thank you American history very good Laurence and good luck to you let's have your first clue Davy Crockett was there Philadelphia I mean when was he there the buzzer means shut up when that buzzer goes you don't talk now Laurence a Blanche you are still 50 points ahead and Blanche rate Kellogg if Arthur Andrew Liggett does not answer correctly on this next round and I'm quite positive he won't then you and Lawrence will end up our big winners in this championship match so Blanche press your red button and let's see your category blank press your red button so we can see your category thank you famous famous what Blanche I couldn't think of anything all right I've really had enough lawrence of blanche you will have to be penalized for not having a category judges can we get a ruling on that penalty deduct 50 points all right Lawrence why the hell are you cheering I'm not sure Alex what does the dunk mean [Music] and the siren of course means that we're out of time tie score what else is new no winners certainly no champions [Applause] [Applause] you

Channel: quantumcat

Views: 217,790

Keywords: SCTV, Second City, Television, Canadian, Comedy, Eugene Levy, Joe Flaherty, Andrea Martin, Martin Short, John Hemphill, Half-Wits, Game Show, 70s show, Spoof, Parody, Schitt's Creek, Alex Trebek, Alex Trebel, Contestants, Jeopardy!, Hi-Q

Id: 8HXyUg0x_mw

Length: 10min 40sec (640 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 23 2019